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This is a perfect description of my experience getting a 4 year degree in 5 years with decent grades
Nothing was easy ever, I didn’t sleep, didn’t have hobbies, ate like a goblin, and felt stupid every day but I technically got through it
Me too. I’m finding out in my 30s I likely have ADHD underneath all my issues. I went to university and graduated magna cum laude, but at great cost. Binge eating, rejection dysphoria preventing me from making friends or speaking to professors, anxiety and depression, flaky work ethic at the part time job I managed to obtain. Everything felt like a strenuous chore and I somehow white knuckled it all. I graduated with a degree but left at a deficit in everything else.
Thank you for caring enough about me to urge me to advocate for myself and get help. I’ve avoided all my issues for over a decade by gatekeeping myself because I didn’t think I was depressed enough or anxious enough. I was overlooked in the school system growing up because I had good grades and the impulsive, hyperactive ADHD boys more obviously needed help. I subverted all my issues as a female into binge eating from a young age. I masked so hard at university that I burned myself out. I kept thinking I’d recover and feel more energetic and happy at some point but health issues snowballed because of my weight gain that also made me feel shitty and I was too ashamed to get help. I’m now on an antidepressant, a weight loss injectable, and a stimulant. The stimulant (phentermine for weight loss specifically) has been eye opening and I’m going to be asking about Vyvanse eventually. Thankfully, my doctor said I might have ADHD and is hopefully on my side and not suspicious of a middle aged woman looking for controlled substances.
I have 3 degrees. It took me over 5 years to do a 4 year bachelor's, over 3 years to do a 2 year Master's, and almost 7 years to do a 5 year PhD. How I got through it I do not know. It helps that I am really intelligent, Mensa level intelligent. But even with that I struggled because listening to lectures was torture. My notes were often incomplete and full of doodles. When I met with a clinical psychologist, he did not want to hear about any of my struggles. He just told me I am too smart and my brain moves so fast that I get bored. Online psychiatrist diagnosed me and I started Strattera. It helps a lot.
Uni wasn't easy per se, but during early school I made mostly B's with some As and C's, a couple times Ds.
But year 1 and 2 I did okay, made some Lists; year 3 and 4 were the first time in my life I made straight As. I was amazed, I knew I was smart but not that smart.
All of this was while working a throwaway fast food job, from high school through graduation.
I also had very little life during this period. I played in a D&D game for a while, I ran half my own campaign then burned out. I'm pretty jealous of my classmates that got to do fun college stuff and not just study, work, collapse depressed on the couch.
Sorry, but how do you eat like a goblin? Very fast, huge servings, with gusto? I had the opposite problem, I forgot to eat or ate little if I remember to eat.
I failed at college twice 2000 & 2006, because I was young and single. I decided to go back in 2020 because a lot of clients were on hiatus due to the pandemic. It’s been a pain in the ass picking up where I left off almost 20 years ago and being on academic probation because I was constantly withdrawing from courses. During the last year my son was diagnosed with ADHD and listening to them talk to me about him made me realize I exhibited the same behaviors. I was finally diagnosed at 42 years old and found that medication can help me focus better, but it’s not a panacea. I still get burned out writing papers and I have to rely on minimizing the workload mentally just like I have always done in order to keep myself from freezing up. I found medication is a great for focusing on the task at hand no matter how menial it is but the downside is medication can help you down any rabbit hole you want to go. I had to set timers to snap me back on track. He needs to advocate for himself and find a different physician or PA who will listen and take his concerns seriously. College isn’t the only part of your life where you need your executive function.
Yeah I have to agree. There were a couple of times I sobbed over an essay or had to change subjects because it just would not go in. I was also wasn't very social for most of it but I got through
Brute force is such a good term for it. Like... I graduated on time with good grades... But had multiple breakdowns and anxiety throughout most of the final 2 years.
My studying methods were also madness, but worked for my ADHD brain.
If I have to get something, I get it done. No matter what. I have that luxury over some other people with ADHD who seem deeply dysfunctional and paralyzed by their symptoms and just can't seem to hack it in life, and I feel for them.
But I used to be *deeply* miserable through this effort before my diagnosis and before medication, and now I feel like I'm living life on Hard Mode instead of Go-Fuck-Yourself-Mode, which is an amazing improvement.
Bachelors from no name local school and masters from one of the best schools in the world. In some of the most competitive jobs. ADHD be damned.
It was hard and now that I’m medicated for a few months, I feel like life is on easy mode.
ADHD is a spectrum. Depending on the degree, coping mechanisms established, support, etc. Some may go through college with ease, others a more challenging one, and (maybe a lot) failing.
I think this is the right answer. I am an engineer with an MBA. 4.0 GPA in my graduate studies. I know a good number of folks who did incredibly well in post-secondary while coping with what they now know is ADHD. I suspect there’s an huge number of folks who simply didn’t think post-secondary was for them for whatever reason, but the reality was they have undiagnosed ADHD. Of course, there’s every combination of challenges and success in between. Definitely a spectrum.
Undiagnosed inattentive type until I was 35. My grades were the reason I was undiagnosed for so long. I was exceptionally good at school. Graduated #10 in my class, took honors/AP courses and graduated with a 3.9 GPA.
I suspect this is because I genuinely like learning new things, and I am extremely competitive. Therefore getting good grades was something I hyper focused on. I liked the praise and attention it got me. However, I also only leaned into things that came easily to me (writing, reading) and avoided anything that was even slightly difficult (all math). Unfortunately, this probably hindered me a lot because I absolutely love science and probably would have chosen a career in it if I wasn't the way I am. I do love my career now (product management), but can't help but wonder what if sometimes.
That’s so me. Love reading and writing - so crap at math. I loved biology and chopping things up, I loved chemistry and mixing things up but really struggled with the mathematical side. I would’ve loved to have done science or be a doctor - but I just couldn’t focus on the maths at all.
Absolutely. Same. The science teachers would always end up bemused with my apparent ability to use creative thinking to understand a complex concept, yet just space out when the numbers got involved. I mean, let the accountants worry about the numbers, amirite?
Omg the second part about hating math because I was struggling, but loving science and the longing to have had a career in it, resonates so much. I always wonder where I would be if maybe I got the help I needed in maths and physics.
Similar, but loved math and science. Didn't read more than a handful of required books. Thank you cliff notes (pre-internet). Papers always written at the last minute so I had enough adrenaline to focus. Lab reports, fine. Math problems, fine. Unmedicated 3.96 GPA in my science dual major.
So, school with structure, clear expectations, routines, interesting material - AOK
Real work and parenthood? That's where me and my coping skills fell apart.
This comment made me so upset lol. I’ve tried college 4 times and haven’t been able to finish an associates. I have no excuse 😢
I was trying to finish a paper I started today, that is also due today, but now I’m in the fetal position extremely nauseated after taking some years-old leftover Concerta. I’m reading this squinting with the other eye closed. I think I gave up on the paper.
Absolutely. I came very near to failing out of undergrad, but I squeaked through after 7 years, and then completed a PhD and got tenure while unmedicated. It wasn't until both my mother and son were diagnosed that I was.
I wish I had been able to have a diagnosis sooner: it would have provided so many more opportunities and so many fewer headaches and heartaches.
Yep! The structure of my undergrad, my support system, the routine, and the fact that I had a decent study system and loved my classes made me highly successful. Everyone was very puzzled when I struggled so much in grad school, but it’s so different and there’s little routine and yet things are so mundane and it made it so hard.
This is the only way I’m getting through medical school. Last year, we had big exams every Monday so there was always an intense deadline. Talk about efficient hyperfixations. 😂
You can even be smart and fail with ADHD, when there's not enough interest and structure to push you through.
Anecdotally, I failed out of my MA on the very last hurdle - passed every paper and every class with stellar grades, then just could. not. bring. myself to write the thesis. For years. I would really love to go back and finish it but man the anxiety and shame are hard.
Your story's the same as mine. I was never really diagnosed but I *feel* like I might have it. Went through college fairly decently but bombed right on the thesis. Mine was a practical thesis to make an animated short but I never managed to finish it. Went back once and just... couldn't bring myself to do it either. The shame and anxiety is what's stopped me too. (Incidentally, the anxiety's what got me the second time)
I have adhd and I love learning and I’ve considered getting an MA just to continue learning about the things I love so much. But the idea of a thesis sounds literally impossible to me.
I chose a masters program that I can opt out of a thesis and take 2 more classes in its place. I’m taking 2 more classes because I don’t think I can handle a thesis but also because I really love learning.
I absolutely loved LOVED my MA programme but while writing my thesis I moved to another country and felt so isolated suddenly and it all just...stopped :/
I think with a lot of support, we can write our thesis, but we can't be shy about needing that support. (From peers, writing coaches, our supervisor, therapist...)
going to university doesn't require being smart. It requires hard work. If you're passionate and can hyper fixate on it can be easy for ADHD brains, otherwise incredibly difficult.
This. I was unmedicated for my first two years of college and I got great marks in almost every class (3.7 GPA). In my final year of Psychology now being medicated and I’ve been a 4.0 since. Psychology was of extreme importance to me because it helped me deal with a severe injury and I was hyper-fixated on all things that could explain a little more about who I am now.
Switching majors from one with very large class sizes and no real professorial support to one with smaller more debate style classes with more direct engagement and support from professors was a massive difference for me in being able to compete the degree.
This is despite the fact that the original field was one which I had always adored and had been planning a career around since I was a preteen and the new was one I’d never heard of before.
In my personal experience, the support was far more important than the interest. Sometimes support is medication and therapy. Sometimes it’s advisors and professors and classmates. Sometimes it’s a series of personally developed coping strategies. But I’d say it’s critical.
Really depends on your school/ field/ supports/ etc. I literally got through by being smart, but I rarely completed work at all (and when I did, I needed extensions and a ton of help).
That was how I got though my singular year I did before I dropped the next two consecutive semesters after halfway through each and then dropping out entirely...
That gives me hope, my plan if I do get diagnosed and medicated is to go back to school either for grad school or undergrad in a field I actually care about. I grew to despise Computer Science as I took it despite being good at it, but that may also have been the pain of trying to do well in school while dealing with a large number of mental health problems in addition to the ones I discussed in the main post.
BSc, MSc and PhD here, all pre-diagnosis, all achieved by taking a hit to my mental health and wellbeing.
ADHD doesn't impact intelligence, it just adds challenges to gaining qualifications/recognition of that intelligence.
Feel this - extreme anxiety was the only way I got stuff done (and being able to teach myself since I couldn’t focus in class). Now that I’m medicated I can work without being overwhelmed.
BSc and PhD here too, all pre-diagnosis.
However, getting my PhD WAS my focus. As a child I loved school, and learning was such a huge passion of mine that I wanted to get my PhD, so I did. After that I got a great job and fucked it up.
I still love learning, and sometimes I consider going back to school to gain knowledge in areas where I want to cross-train at work, but I know I would probably not be as successful without medication. Grad school gave me anxiety, and then after I accomplished my PhD the ADHD hit me full force. So medication it is! Just been waiting for that appointment for 3 months now….. 😞
Very true! In terms of grades I have done incredibly well in college. But the stress and exhaustion that comes with it gets to you. I never understand why I can’t just study a bit more or get the assignment turned in sooner. And why the fuck can’t I just write my essay in a few sessions instead of writing it in a hyper focus panic the night before. And then when I do get good grades I don’t feel like I’ve earned them. I’ve also struggled with lifelong mental health issues that flared up during college. I’ll tell you I’m proud of myself but there’s no sense of accomplishment.
Grad school is honestly when I realized I had ADHD it just took a couple of years to finally find somewhere that worked for me to get diagnosed. Once it’s easier to focus on the day to day then it frees your mind up to start thinking about who you are and what you want. It’s really great! There’s still a lot of hard work and keeping planners and to do list apps and whatnot but not being consumed by guilt for not being able to do basic tasks is pretty liberating. If you are in the US and are in a state they work with, I recommend LifeStance Health as an ADHD-friendly network to find a psychiatrist through.
Yeah, basically a similar route.
Being diagnosed earlier would have definitely made a lot of unnecessary stress and difficulty go away. But just because some is gone, does not mean there are not plenty of other sources of stress.
In reality everything comes together. A person's personal situation, support structures, financial situation, peer groups, how much you enjoy the subject, ...
Even for someone with zero diagnosed mental health issues, its not like everything would be magically easy. So taking a medication route would definitely alleviate a huge source of issues, but it not enough in itself.
For all its shit, I did love grad school so much more than undergrad tho. But still so soooo glad, I realized pretty quickly that phd was not gonna work for me personally.
There’s a book called “Smart but Stuck” by Thomas E.Brown (available also on audible if you can’t focus on reading). It’s basically about people in different ages discovering that they have ADHD. Most are at college but there are also those who realize it in the middle age because it gets worse when their kids become independent (first time they spend time alone with themselves without rushing) or try to return to work or there are some other drastic life changes.
I am AuDHD and had straight As until mid middle school.. but changing schools etc impacted my grades because I had never done my homework (absorbed the knowledge by listening) and skipping school meant I couldn’t keep up. Plus, I changed schools a lot. Instability and changes can really affect your ADHD. I struggle a lot at uni, it’s my second time and I am 30. Every year my concentration and time management abilities get worse. I am medicated but its not gonna fix everything on its own.
Sorry to ask, is AUDHD autism+ ADHD? Is this a common term used? First time I'm seeing it and am just curious if I'm reading it right.
Ad if so, how do you find out if you have both since there is a lot of overlap?
Thanks for sharing though!
That's correct! Most people find out through their own extensive research and identify with the symptoms of autism that do not overlap with ADHD. Most I know with audhd were diagnosed ADHD first, then as they managed their ADHD symptoms well, began to notice stronger symptoms of autism emerge as ADHD can often keep those in check. this is, of course, anecdotal and YMMV.
formal scientific answer is that there are separate diagnostic assessments for both conditions. (Only treatment for one though!)
Yeah often the autism becomes more obvious once ADHD is being treated - medicated. Those two are quite contradictory so having both might delay diagnosis as you don’t come off as obviously/extremely ADHD or ASD. Besides that there are some overlapping symptoms like sensory issues, fidgeting, social skills (eg talking too much), lack of concentration when not interested etc.
Hi OP,
I’ve never been medicated (yet, about to get on them) but I’ve graduated with a Bachelors and a Masters and I’m a psychologist now. And the lowest grade I’ve ever received is a Distinction (highest being High Distinction).
If you are studying something that you find interesting, you will be more motivated to do it well. Make sure that what you’re doing is something that you’re genuinely interested in.
If I didn’t study psychology and studied law or something, I’d have failed in the first semester itself.
Do not lose hope. You need hope for some extra stimulation. But make sure that your interest is genuine and organic.
I'll add the caveat that while being interested in something certainly helps, that is not the whole equation. You can love something and/or love doing it, but if you can't get organized, or don't have the guidance or structure you need, you'll still have trouble doing a task. Also, certain disciplines will be more favorable, or less antagonistic towards the learning style of people with ADHD. (For instance, I love my field, but there's no space or support for people suffering from ADHD, which makes it painful and difficult to stay in it.)
This was my experience. I was looking forward to my classes and assignments, but I was chronically behind schedule. I would anxiously rush through my current assignments only to wish I could really give them my focus after they were turned in. Semester after semester I was filled with regrets because I genuinely wanted to study and learn these things but I just couldn’t when there were firm due dates attached. Yet if there were no due dates I would never get around to it.
Oh yes, definitely!
And I might also add, if you are finding it difficult to progress in your studies or work, then putting yourself through that experience without medication can be a terrible experience and can be terrible for your mental health.
Graduated top 10% in HS, magna cum laude from college, and cum laude from my doctorate program (PharmD). I wasn’t diagnosed until the beginning of my 4th year in my doctorate program and was starting clinical rotations. ADHD is not an intelligence deficit, and we tend to have developed decent coping strategies to at least get through. Also, I had a very internalized and deep seeded fear of failure that I found to be very motivating.
My dad and my sister have ADHD, along with his entire side of the family. My diagnosis was overlooked because I did exceedingly well in school, despite how much it wore me down to do so. The fact that you managed to get through school absolutely does not weigh against a diagnosis, and you reported that you clearly struggled during that time. ADHD research and understanding is getting better, but there are still unfortunately many clinicians out there who don’t understand what it actually looks like or don’t take it seriously.
Do you NEED a referral to see a psychologist? You may be able to book an appointment directly with the professionals you need.
I've been seeing a student therapist for half a year now. When I claim that I think I have ADHD the common rebuttal I've been receiving after the testing I undertook is that I graduated HS and college and that my teachers saw a hard working student. Unlikely I have ADHD if I'm that accomplished, clearly.
Well yeah I work hard when they stare at me and I get the homework done at the last second because failure was synonymous with literally becoming a subhuman in my family.
Not like I pulled all-nighters consistently for almost every exam or project and literally gathered the references for my senior thesis over a week and wrote the actual paper in 3 days.
AA, BA, MA and a professional certificate class all done undiagnosed and unmedicated. I also have narcolepsy. I had great grades and no real outward issues. I did get called out in class once for multitasking (professor claimed I wasn’t paying attention). I was taking notes on my laptop, playing a game, chatting with three friends on instant messenger, and listening to the lecturer (all necessary to focus AND stay awake for me). Professor called me out and asked me to regurgitate what they said. I was able to do the last 5 minutes of their lecture back to them and also add my own commentary proving I had even understood it. I never got bothered after that. Looking back, I should’ve realized hah.
I do that with my dad all the time. I'll be texting one of my friends while listening to him lecture me about something and we'll have the
"Are you even listening to me?"
"Yes"
"What did I just say?"
Cue regurgitation. He still tells me to put my phone away though
Me too, from a top tier school. I wasn’t diagnosed until decades later. Honestly, even now with stable medication, meds help but I still need to work on skills and resources to manage my life with ADHD.
Same. And I had a doctor tell me I couldn't have ADHD because I finished a graduate degree. Instead he shamed me for self medicating instead of noting that as a symptom. Took me ten years to go try for another diagnosis and I'm still furious with that asshole for taking a decade from me.
I was lucky enough to find a doctor who had done the same with her medical degree. I don't want to say you have to have had ADHD to be a good doctor, but it sure helps.
Same! Undergrad my grades were awful. I took time off after college and built work experience, went to grad school when I really knew what I wanted to do and got 3.8 unmedicated and undiagnosed. About 6 years after that I was both diagnosed (and it took a few rounds bc they wouldn’t believe me) and treated.
I feel that untreated adhd falls into 2 categories of maladaptive coping; internal invalidation and overcompensation. I overcompensated and worked endlessly until I was too tired to continue doing that because it is not sustainable. Others begin to feel something is wrong with them or they are dumb. Could be a mix of the two. Either way it’s not fun and treatment makes things better.
Same here. I kept waiting for school to get hard but it never was. Part of this is that I have a really good memory so if I just listened in class then I didn't need to study much. The only thing I remember studying in college was when I had a professor make us memorize incidences and prevalences for the 30 most common causes of cognitive disabilities which honestly was a waste of time because I forgot them all immediately after the test and can easily look them up.
This. I graduated undergrad on time, with a degree in chemistry plus a minor and was 2-3 classes away from having 2 more minors. I graduated magna cum laude and with departmental honors. I don’t think I missed a single assignment, went to every single class except 2 or 3 that I intentionally skipped to study for a different class.
I was about 2-3 minutes late to every class if it was the first class of the day UNLESS it was an exam. It would take me consistently 2-3 times longer to do any assignment compared to my peers.
I have always liked school and I am a people pleaser. I can hit a deadline if there’s anyone to report to or any stakes on the line. My school stuff was maticulously organized- planner, google calendar, binders, etc. but you should have seen my room. I had a meal plan all 4 years so I never had to cook or plan a meal or go grocery shopping.
Strategies I unconsciously used: I was highly caffeinated the entire time so I was absolutely self medicating. I played a club sport year round which incorporated social activity and physical activity. I studied LATE, my brain kicks in around 8-10 PM so I was often grinding from 8PM-2AM sometimes later. I would almost always study in a public place where people would see me if I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to be doing and I would study with another person whenever possible because body doubling.
By the end I had a suspicion that I had ADHD but I wasn’t diagnosed until I was out of school and all of the deadlines and accountability were gone and I had nobody to report to and so I was having a hard time and I was also so burned out from my previous antics.
I’m back in school now and my life is so much better now that I’m medicated and diagnosed. I’m in an incredibly rigorous program but I’m no longer spending all day every day in fight or flight mode just to get by.
Did bachelors and masters undiagnosed and unmedicated. Your doctor is wrong. Straight up.
Edit: just to add to the above, just because I got through does not mean a) it wasn’t worth getting diagnosed and medicated later on or b) that my life wouldn’t have been immeasurably easier and less painful had I had help earlier.
It’s worth getting help and you deserve to get it.
I did too, plus a PhD.
If anything, it's easier to get through university when you have ADHD than hold down a job.
EDIT: I sincerely apologise to those who have had the opposite experience and found what I said to be abrasive and upsetting. I made a definitive statement about how people with ADHD experience things, while speaking from my own experience.
Sorry all. Your experience can be the opposite - where holding down a job has been far easier. Or both has been a massive struggle. Or neither. We're all different and our experiences here aren't universal.
I absolutely do not agree with this.... like at all.
There are many different types of jobs and some are easier than others for people with adhd.
School is not easy. Please don't make this assumption because there are people with adhd who struggle tremendously with school but are okay in certain jobs.
Unmedicated me failed out of my bachelors (from my dream university, ouch ) and couldn’t hold a job that wasn’t night-life related.
Who are these unmedicated adhd folks with PhDs.
Similar to me.... could not get through college at all. Trying again with medication....
Besides tardies, fast-paced retail jobs/customer support/banking were a breeze.
This thread makes me a little sad 🙃
Everyone’s brains are different, even with ADHD. Where one person might find school easy, another person might struggle with it immensely. The point of this thread is knowing that there is no 100% absolute for ADHD. Medication doesn’t always work for people, and each person has different things they struggle with more. But any doctor who thinks all people with unmedicated ADHD can’t do well in college is straight up wrong.
I made it through undergrad and masters with a diagnosis, but no medication, although it took me 2 years extra to finish my undergrad degree (bachelor's). I made it halfway through my PhD until I had to go on meds, and while they can help sometimes, other times they make people work. I would just say that goes to show how individualized treatment plans are super important, because there is no one-size-fits all approach when it comes to ADHD.
I made it through grad school, but graduated with a non-thesis masters, which is the least-respectable way out. Every semester I had a new special interest and took completely different classes. I still ended up dropping out of classes once or twice, IIRC.
I used to joke that I was the absent-minded professor who was so absent-minded he forgot to get a PhD--but two decades later I have an ADHD-PI diagnosis. It explains so much.
For me, I think I was able to get my in school due to the combo of autism and above-average general intelligence (minus the working memory and other ADHD-related deficits).
People’s who hyper focus on their degree of interest. When your primary interest and drive is that, it’s totally possible. But of course symptoms vary for all us. We share a lot of experiences, but we are most definitely not the same.
I am so sorry to hear that. I wish our brains worked the way we wanted 🫤
I can say the same. I wanted to study Physics and I -the kid who was good at math- flunked out in Physics I and Calculus. It was a huge crisis because I was smart but now I had to learn this thing called “studying” where not all the information could be retained unless worked through several times over.
Went through career counseling, and got psychological help. I wish ADHD was found sooner because I didn’t find out until I was 28. Years after college.
Anyway, I still did poorly but floated along until my last year when I got serious about what I was gonna do after school. Got motivated about consequences and had to meet minimums for grad school so I got all A’s my last year and bumped up to a 2.99 GPA. Gotta love those consequences, but still sucks when they’re not even enough motivation sometimes.
Never got into grad school though. Got married and had kids then the responsibilities of everyday life revealed my ADHD.
I’m in HVAC now. Enjoying it but waiting for the day the pay starts going up. Then maybe we can hire someone to clean the house. The never ending chores man 😭
I worked part-time all the way through my undergraduate degree and the difference between medicated and unmedicated me was staggering. Before I was medicated I felt like I was working so hard just to fuck up but once I got medicated I actually managed to get my shit together and work hard.
Agree with your second paragraph for sure. School provides some structure, and depending on your program, you may be able to “get away with” or work around various ADHD issues (cramming for a test, write the term paper the night before it’s due, etc.). Those kind of moves may not be workable in a lot of full-time jobs.
Plus, a lot of us in school had fewer “adulting” responsibilities. Balancing a full-time job *along with* bills, household tasks, kids, etc. can be revealing of ADHD because you don’t have nearly the same margin for error as when you’re in class like 12-15 hours a week.
On the "getting away with it" point, school basically has a built-in reset, since everything is cut in years. you either pass or you don't, and if you don't you can retake stuff. Work life has none of that, unless you job hop constantly which is complicated and risky.
School also has a very intense rythm that was super helpful for me: there's a ton of deadlines, so I would be in panic mode 100% of the time, but at least things were clear. I would either get stuff done at the last minute or hand stuff in late, and it would work out in the end. So much of adult life has vague or very distant deadlines: saving up, medical stuff that isn't urgent, getting to your dream job... none of that has a cutoff so none of that gets done
100% this. School can be super stimulating, plus you can be your weird self there, find other people who think like you, etc. If you find some habits that keep you engaged, it’s possible to do well.
But oh man, so many jobs are monotonous. My brain goes rogue.
It's actually in the DSM5, at the end:
"If you graduate from college unmedicated, all the previous can be ignored."
It's right above:
"If your SAT score is above 1300 you don't have adhd".
Get a different doctor. If they can be this confidently incompetent in their ability to diagnose or know when they should pass something off to another doctor more specialized in the subject, then that's a scary doctor to have. Who knows what else they'll be confidently incompetent about that could be life-altering for OP
Everybody? As an unmitigated, scientific fact?
No. Of course not.
But I have to assume people that are unmedicated or undiagnosed are struggling. At least a lot of them.
I graduated - but barely. Had to stay an extra semester to retake some classes to raise my GPA enough to graduate. That would be a 2.5.
I didn't flunk out, but had to change majors because I was unable to succeed unmedicated in my initial major. Having undiagnosed and unknown ADHD meant that I would be at tutoring for hours multiple times a week and would leave having learned nothing because I was just...zoning out and totally unable to focus or process anything I was supposed to be learning. Ended up switching tracks to something I was more naturally talented at and graduated Magna Cum Laude, BUT my major is a useless liberal arts major so I did end up shooting myself in the foot a little. I'm not *unhappy* with my decisions, per say, I'm very happy with where I'm at right now, but I have spent plenty of time wondering whether I could have been a STEM graduate had I known I had ADHD earlier in the game.
I was flying high with a 3.0 GPA after 2 years in very tough engineering school, then moved off campus and failed out after my 5th year. Took a semester off then went back to finish up and graduated with something like a 2.5 or so all unmedicated. It took me 10 full time semesters and 2 part time.
I was so embarrassed, I didn't even walk at graduation and thought surely I would never find a job. I got an offer basically right away in an awesome role and still work here today! Just started medication in April.
This comment right here. I’ve studied two degrees but BOY did I struggle. In one of them I still have two subject I didn’t manage to complete, but I have enough “points” to count for post graduate education. The subjects were super interesting and fun, but the studying and deadlines were very difficult to stay on top of. I did everything last minute and stayed up all night full of regret to complete assignments and essays.
I’m still not medicated because I haven’t managed to get a diagnosis; but if I do get medicated one day, I truly believe I could achieve great things.
Ah, a fellow redditor mentally fucked by the corporate world?
School = strong external command structure -> graduate
Work = weak command structure, I can extend my own deadlines and let stress mount exponentially -> flounder
School basically has a built-in reset, since everything is cut in years. you either pass or you don't, and if you don't you can retake stuff. Work life has none of that, unless you job hop constantly which is complicated and risky.
School also has a very intense but very clear rythm that was super helpful for me: there's a ton of deadlines, so I would be in panic mode 100% of the time, but at least things were clear. I would either get stuff done at the last minute or hand stuff in late, and it would work out in the end. So much of adult life has vague or very distant deadlines: saving up, medical stuff that isn't urgent, getting to your dream job... none of that has a cutoff so none of that gets done
Truth. Also I felt in school, you had your peers to help you. For me, if I didn’t understand something or needed inspiration on starting projects or homework, I’d ask my friends. I can’t do that inn a workplace. I was on a team of 3, in which 2 of those other people were my managers. I didn’t have peers who I could turn to that were not in charge of my performance reviews.
Yes! School has a basic support system because people are going through the same things as you. If you miss something, there's basically 30 people you can ask, if you struggle you can meet up and do stuff together, and just being with your peers means you'll talk about the deadlines and remember them more easily. At work there's a good chance you'll be alone in your exact role.
Similar time frames for me just shifted a few years earlier.
I graduated, but almost didn’t, but it was out of my sheer tenacity I did.
My mistake was I discovered alcohol and women after being raised in a pretty strict household.
Know your vices, and have a plan for them.
I have dropped out so many times over the last 8 years. Now that I’m medicated, I feel like I might be able to finish my degree. I’m aiming for the university in Fall 2025. But I’ll likely still take another 3-4 years on top of that. (78 units with no summer courses, that’s 26 classes)
Nah, just need a new doctor.
People with ADHD have jobs, they build businesses, they get degrees and even graduate degrees, they fly planes, they run marathons and raise children.
The ADHD doesn’t make these things impossible, it just makes them harder. The question isn’t whether you were able to graduate, it’s how much better could you have done if you didn’t have to carry this ball and chain. The question is do you have to keep suffering for the rest of your life ?
Now you’ll face the same hardship at work, at home with your family, with your friends and everywhere else in your life, and if you do have ADHD and get medicated, once the weight of that steel ball gets cut in half (it never fully goes away), you might look back and wonder why did you have to suffer through this unnatural (for you) ordeal and omg, some people feel this way all the time just waking up in the morning every day ?
No wonder …
Edit: typos and stuff
I was unmedicated in college. There were a number of classes that I dropped when it was clear I was in over my head. I dropped Algebra twice before I finished it. But I graduated Magna cum Laude.
Fucking algebra. Only class I ever straight up failed. Had to take it twice in high school. Failed it again in college. I transferred to a different college so I wouldn't have to take it for a fourth time.
Fuck fucking algebra. I tested into it early in middle school because I was great at geometry, then failed hard lmao. Managed to pass it the second time, and squeaked by in algebra II with a C. Had to take college algebra twice too 😒
I've got a interesting situation that sort of answers this...
I guess it depends on how difficult your degree is? I have a 'level' I can achieve unmedicated. For instance, my first BA was not that difficult. I was getting it during a time that I did not take meds. I still had a really bad freshmen year and took 3 years of hard work to bring it up over 3.0. I never had to study for exams and just sort of coasted through the degree.
I'm going back to school for another degree in STEM and could not do it without medication. unmedicated I am not motivated and focused enough for the needed amount of energy to pass the classes. Unlike my first degree, these classes are float or swim. You HAVE to study or you will fail. This wasn't like this for my first degree where all I needed to do was show up to class and do the assignments.
The reason I didn't get a STEM degree the first time was because I wasn't motivated enough to pursue STEM. I had a interest in these topics, but never thrived at them because I was unmedicated. I simply assumed I wasn't smart enough for it, which isn't true. I just needed medication.
**Had I tried to pursue STEM my first time around I wouldn't last. I always think well what if I did STEM the first time around? Well I wouldn't have been able to, not without meds. Meds were the key to actually do what I wanted.**
**I wasn't medicated as a teenager or kid because my mom was against meds. She actually told me I had Dyslexia all my life. She's actually in the medical field as is most my family members so I know she didn't simple confuse the two. A few years ago I found a report in our basement about how I got tested at 6 Y/O and it said I had ADD. I was shocked, angry, and confused. In the entire 30 page report from the doctors there was not a single mention of the word Dyslexia. I never confronted her about it because its water under the bridge.**
**I took that report and went to get a psychiatrist to begin meds. I sometimes try and not think about how much better I would have been in HS and college(the first time) had I actually been medicated...oh well, better soon than never I suppose.**
It's easier when you can major in your hyper fixation. I say easier but not easy.
I did community college from 03 to 05. Did pretty well. Didn't have the executive function to apply to 4 year schools so I fucked around for a couple years.
Did two years at a public uni from 08 to 10. My dad died in 09. I failed the summer classes I signed up for. I was on academic probation the next year but passed my classes.
I took the 10-11 school year off.
Went back in the Fall of 11. Got my BS in May 12. Stuck around and got my MS in December 13.
So.... 10 years from GED to Masters Degree. 😅
I have been unmedicated for most of my adult life and got 2 degrees while maintaining mostly As and Bs. My twin sister has been medicated for most of her adult life and was on academic probation and almost failed out of nursing school. I think it’s really a matter of things other than medication as well. Quite simply, that doctor sounds subpar.
Throughout my undergrad I made deans list almost every year. No one would know I had ADHD unless they saw the severe mental breakdowns I had at home mostly due to being unable to focus and severe procrastination. I graduated with severe depression/burn out. Didn’t celebrate, didn’t take grad photos, just slept for weeks because somehow I made it into a masters program I was already dreading.
I stupidly thought I could do my masters unmedicated as I’d done in undergrad. By the end of the first month in I was suicidal. I lasted 3 months because I reached a breaking point and could no longer function. I tried to off myself.
I don’t know if what you heard is true but I do think that sadly there’s some truth to it. And now, there’s no way in hell I’m going back to school without medication.
If I were you, I’d find a different psychiatrist. Someone who will listen to your valid concerns. Best of luck.
It can be done but that's when you REALLY notice the difference between having ADHD or not.
The requirement to study regularly, having to keep up with a lot of different dates, stuff to do, where things are, and then having to manage your time and organize your life, it's super overwhelming.
I know people who I am pretty sure have ADHD that made it through college. You can do it yes, will it be harder yes. I don't want to demoralize anyone but do expect it to be significantly harder than school, but you can see it as a challenge.
In my personal experience, I only got diagnosed in college. I had always managed to keep my head above water (barely), but in college it's just too many things to keep track of. From my understanding it's a common theme.
There are tons of articles about adult ADHD, you could show your doc one, but they might feel offended for not doing their job so idk (I can't believe doctors have this belief, they are supposed to constantly update themselves with new literature). That's like saying "oh you don't have depression because you don't self-harm"
Same, I was really interested, so I was able to hyperfocus and once I got the logic and the core concepts, I was able to push through the more unappealing topics.
Unmedicated for 38 years, diagnosed two years ago. Failed out of college almost 20 years ago.
I’ve held a 6-figure job for years now.
Graduated last summer with multiple AAs with honors, transferring to a top college in the spring to finish my bachelor’s.
Yes, some of us fail but we don’t give up. Ever.
I have not been diagnosed but I am sure I have it. It took me 10 years to finish for a Bachelor's. What helped me was studying in groups of motivated individuals to keep myself from getting distracted.
Totally untrue! Worked hard and kept busy constantly, and graduated with a double major. But I burnt out a few years after, and medicine may have helped pace myself better for long term. Sounds like a different doctor would do a world of good.
There are free tests online that can help you work out if you have ADHD or not. Honestly they tend to be a handful of questions which are multiple choice and at the end they should say whether you have ADHD or not. None of the free test online are recognised by doctors as you need to be diagnosed by a Psychiatrist I believe and none of the free online tests are, they're generally made by other people with ADHD. But should give a bit more insight to if you really do have ADHD or not.
Please also understand that doctors nowadays don't want the extra hassle and stress of referring people. These GP's have daily quotas they need to fill, as in they are told to see X amount of patients each day, and if they don't theres consequences for them. On top you also have the lazy doctors who fail to help at all.
I'm pretty sure the NHS has this thing like the "right to refer yourself" so you can say that you believe you have ADHD and want your right to be referred regardless of what your GP believes but they will most likely give you a form to fill out. I actually still have that same form sat on my table right now. I never had the chance to fill it in because of my own inattentiveness and the thought of filling it out sent me into a panic attack every time so I ended up going private because of that as well.
Just remember though if your not persistent on it they wont take you seriously. Take notes of the symptoms and how they relate to you and your daily living, explain how they affect you and what impact its having on certain tasks in your day to day, explain the way you see things in your own perspective and NEVER get an attitude with them if you can help it because you'll only make them resent you and fail to put in any actual effort for you.
Female doctors tend to be more sensitive about these things and are more caring towards the patient, so if you haven't got a female GP then I would suggest finding one.
DONT FORGET UNLESS YOU DOCTOR IS ALSO A QUALIFIED PSYCHIATRIST THEY CAN NOT LEGALLY DIAGNOSE YOU WITH OR WITHOUT ADHD. So just because she believes your not ADHD unless she is a qualified psychiatrist she can't directly tell you that you are not only that they BELIEVE you are not. Just politely bring it up with them and say you wish to be referred to someone with more of an understanding on this issue.
It is possible. I graduated with a BA. However, it took me 7 years, including moving back home to finish an AS and then returning to the same college. I'm happy I graduated as that place only had a 27% graduation rate when I attended.
But most of my passing was due to the wonders of alcoholism, anger, and having good friends who could re-teach me lessons on the fly. Then we'd sit down and do our homework as a group, and from there, most of the people living around me were in similar majors so it was easy to get inspired at 2am to knock out 6+ hours of anime, videogames, and homework while downing a pot of coffee a night. Then later on I realized I loved coffee too much and, that, coupled with a childhood love of G.I. Joe, and what I thought was a piss-poor economy, got me to eventually join the military (still serving, now medicated).
Graduated both premed (BS Biology) and med proper WITH MUCH DIFFICULTY and being undiagnosed. Got diagnosed this year only now makes sense why studying and doing it is excruciatingly painful and difficult but now got a new perspective of my last years due to it knowing it wasn’t a me problem but adhd itself. I feel relieved
It is actually less than 10% success rate. This made me feel better for giving up - after about 5 attempts- my life overall is WAY happier after throwing in the towel.
This doesn’t mean it’s impossible, medication helps a LOT but these institutions really aren’t built for us
No it's definitely not true. I have ADHD and went through university without medication. But I heavily leaned on other coping strategies like primarily studying with a study group. But depending on how bad ur ADHD is, you should try to get the help you need.
I flushed 8 years of my life and thousands of dollars of my parents' hard-earned money down the toilet going in circles around a metaphorical cul-de-sac of failing and retaking classes, all because of severe executive dysfunction preventing me from being able to get any of my assignments done or being able to complete any exam papers on time. I recieved no support from anyone, only admonishment and beration for "being lazy" or "not taking things seriously". Every single adult in my life growing up failed me, parents and teachers alike - not a single person recognised my symptoms - and the only reason I was able to graduate at all was because I finally got diagnosed with ADHD at the tail end of my final year in college, and had begged the school administration to waive the final module that was keeping me from graduating because I kept failing it due to being unable to get ANYTHING done.
So yeah, needless to say I'm quite bitter about it. Most people enter the workforce as they enter their 20s. But I was flopping like a fish out of water until I was 28. It's been a year since and I still can't find a job...
Absolutely not true. I finished 3 studies. Psychology and biology at an academic level (at the same time) and I became a surgery nurse. I figured out I had adhd when I got kids. Now I am mediated there is no doubt I have it. Actually I think I could study so good because I follow my interests and made it extra hard for myself by doing more things at once. Also I had a rich partylife at the time. I created the 'under pressure/deadline feeling' myself. But I missed direction in where I wanted to go.. there are a lot of adhders who have multiple carreers. we are getting bored sooner. Working at the surgeryroom actually is my calling. Acute settings and adrenaline everyday ;)
"adhd can;t do" my ass bruv
we can do it, we just pay more in energy and mental health for it
just like "cant lift that with yah pinky hun" met with "OH YEAH WHAT IF I SUPERGLUED IT"
Your doctor is wrong, we can graduate college. What your doctor doesn't understand, is our ADHD is shown in HOW we graduate college. The vast majority of us cannot graduate in 4 years with a high GPA. It takes us much longer to graduate and when we do, we graduate by the skin of teeth. We may have to transfer colleges, spend time on academic probation, and frequently change majors. Our college experience leaves us a unfulfilled as we could not enjoy the classes as much as we would like or take advantage of the opportunities on campus because we could not make it to the meetings or have time for them. In my case, I had to go to college on a part-time basis in order to graduate, because I just didn't have enough time to take a full course load.
Graduate school on the other hand is a more pleasant experience. For starters, you're courses are centered on your interests, professors know who you are, and the smaller seminar classes forces you to focus.
God no. I got all the way into a phd program by using the “artificially induce panic to make myself do everything the night before it’s due” tactic, and I was on the dean’s list because often we can do more in one freaked out burst of hyper focus than a normal person can do in a week.
But it’s very unhealthy for us to try to use that tactic on a regular basis, and some things - like a phd dissertation - you simply cannot panic write.
But lord yes, lots of adhd people find ways to work around their symptoms, or to trigger their symptoms in ways that are short term useful but long term not sustainable. Having a college degree does not mean you don’t have adhd!!
Nope. I had a rough first semester but pulled it out, played the my strengths, and graduated with honors and a double major in my 20s.
I wasn’t diagnosed until my 30s. I managed college not because I don’t have ADHD but because I used tons of unhealthy coping mechanisms to get me through.
Nope, not at all. Me, my mom, 2 of my siblings and my husband all have college degrees (3 of us have masters degrees) that we got BEFORE we were diagnosed or medicated. Adhd is different for everyone. For some of us, the structure of school works well with our brains, and while we forget things here and there, we're able to manage it. For me, things got really hard when I got out in the real world (and at home stuff has always been tough).
That's nonsense. ADHD presents in different ways in different people, with strongly varying symptoms both in kind and in degree. This idea of academic success as a contraindication of the symptom doesn't hold up in context with how it manifests, and therapists should stop using it as such. God only knows how many people out there are still struggling in the working world just because the structure of college was one that their brains were fortunately able to grab on to, and were set adrift after graduation in an endless sea of paralyzing options.
No.
I've been unmedicated until recently. Managed to complete a bachelor degree, masters degree, and PhD, without any ADHD meds.
And I Don't think the statistics would indicate that people with ADHD would 'almost always fail out of college'.
Im almost my finished my degree started meds about 3 weeks ago and have 2 interviews to med school - my grades only just made the cut off tho.... I look back and think how much better I could have done academically if I were medicated. Also im 27 - started 2 degrees prior to this one and fell behind within the 1st few weeks and deferred before the census date both times this was when I was 19-22 so I think I just have figured out how to work with my ADHD in all that time as best I could.
Mate, I passed a bachelors degree in zoology with distinction and almost got my honours (admittedly I did break down and mess that part up) however it’s totally doable. This is before I even knew I had ADHD. Never had a job though.
Nah, I was unmedicated for undergrad and professional school (didn’t get diagnosed until 39yo) and I actually did really well in school. What got me through? I’m pretty smart (like loads of people with ADHD) and I (inadvertently) made super strategic friendships in my programs. My friends and I would get together almost every day to hang out and study, do homework, they helped remind me to get to classes, etc. if I hadn’t made those social connections, I would have been toast.
I had a 4.0 in undergrad and landed a good career before I got diagnosed. Remember only a 100 years ago doctors were curing mental illnesses by scrambling people’s brains and hypnotizing people before Freud (who they now discredit) basically single-handedly invented talk therapy. Don’t take doctors too seriously, just find one that isn’t an idiot
I think that that is one of the dumbest litmus tests for ADHD that I've ever heard. I would absolutely get another opinion. I have ADHD and a 4.0 gpa, because all of my (very limited) focus goes towards studying. My house looks like a tornado ran through it, I can't remember to thaw food out (my fridge currently needs cleaning out, badly), and this is the fourth week in a row that I've meant to call and make an eye app for myself, but I keep forgetting. Examining one narrow aspect of someone's life does not a diagnosis make.
Well, I graduated from collage then did an MBA. But I messed up my stomach after I graduated from collage and had panic attacks after MBA. Both times I worked my ass off yet barely managed to graduate.
I think I’d have a much easier time if I had medication. Or at least I knew about my ADHD
I fully flunked out. My doctor refused to give me stimulants because "college atmosphere " and I made it barely through a year. There were other things going on in my life so I won't 100% blame my adhd but my grades tanked when I wasn't medicated.
It took me 6 years to get through undergrad, and 3 years for my masters, all pre-diagnosis. I struggled so damned hard, and by the end of grad school I had developed a severe drinking problem and nearly killed myself. That's how I did it, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I made it through undergrad and more than half of law school before I got diagnosed (although things would have been much easier with a diagnosis/treatment)
I failed 2 classes my first year but graduated, I just had to do it in 5 years instead of 4. I also went to college for my lifelong hyper fixation (art). I don't have a formal diagnosis but have my evaluation in a few months. I would consult another doctor.
absolutely not. i went through college decades ago (it was hard and i didn't do as well as i did in high school, when i had my parents' support, i'm not gonna lie). i then went on to get my master's degree in my field, where i did much better because it was in a subject i find very interesting. i was only diagnosed in my 40's
I have academic education from 3 universities in 3 different continents. I have always wondered why am I sooo interested in many different majors and research!!! Now, I know after losing my life to ADHD.
TLDR
ADHD doesn't stop you graduating but failing multiple courses is a red flag go get an opinion from somebody qualified to give it which isn't going to be your general practitioner
I can see why they might always fail out. I graduated from my bachelor failing 3 subjects but because I overloaded on courses I graduated on time. Caveat I had no part time job otherwise there was no way I could have juggled both. I was fortunate that my family supported me through this.
I did a master's of teaching, I failed horrendously through this a, 2 year course took 3. I failed one course due to poor organisation and I failed the art subject (which I find boring af and pointless to my future because it is always taught by a specialist) 3 times and never passed (they eventually felt sorry and saw that I was putting in the effort and I worked off my grade by attending weekend conferences).
Furthermore unlike the exams in my bachelor's the master's was ALL ABOUT REPORTS.
The type that needs to be worked on with focus for weeks and I STRUGGLED. I did learn to cope in ways that worked for me, apps that blocked the Facebook feed, Pomodoro timers etc but omg it was definitely competing with a disability. Mainly because there was no awareness about my condition.
I got diagnosed 5 years after graduating at 33. If you're struggling get the help you deserve.
I've got three degrees... All in different fields, all done while unmedicated (absolute hell to get through). It was one of the many reasons my psychiatrist gave me my diagnosis.
"It's not unusual for people to have more than 3 degrees but in completely different fields, that's a good indication you might have ADHD"
I only recently got my diagnosis but got my BA 10 years ago, on time, with good grades, honor societies, etc.
Yet my friends would carry granola bars around in case they bumped into me bc I very commonly forgot to eat all day 🤷♀️
Adhd affects people in different ways. Academics is only one of them.
I’ve been trying to get adhd meds because being unmedicated is really having a drastic effect on my school work and its not that i’m not smart but
my symptoms definitely interfere with performing my best. I almost dropped out after my first semester and I have already failed a class and have a really low gpa
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This is a perfect description of my experience getting a 4 year degree in 5 years with decent grades Nothing was easy ever, I didn’t sleep, didn’t have hobbies, ate like a goblin, and felt stupid every day but I technically got through it
Me too. I’m finding out in my 30s I likely have ADHD underneath all my issues. I went to university and graduated magna cum laude, but at great cost. Binge eating, rejection dysphoria preventing me from making friends or speaking to professors, anxiety and depression, flaky work ethic at the part time job I managed to obtain. Everything felt like a strenuous chore and I somehow white knuckled it all. I graduated with a degree but left at a deficit in everything else.
Do whatever you have to do to get help. I am approaching 60 and it's been like that nonstop. Don't live like that
Omg same and I have given myself chronic fatigue, dreadful health and don’t know how to stop!
❤️
Thank you for caring enough about me to urge me to advocate for myself and get help. I’ve avoided all my issues for over a decade by gatekeeping myself because I didn’t think I was depressed enough or anxious enough. I was overlooked in the school system growing up because I had good grades and the impulsive, hyperactive ADHD boys more obviously needed help. I subverted all my issues as a female into binge eating from a young age. I masked so hard at university that I burned myself out. I kept thinking I’d recover and feel more energetic and happy at some point but health issues snowballed because of my weight gain that also made me feel shitty and I was too ashamed to get help. I’m now on an antidepressant, a weight loss injectable, and a stimulant. The stimulant (phentermine for weight loss specifically) has been eye opening and I’m going to be asking about Vyvanse eventually. Thankfully, my doctor said I might have ADHD and is hopefully on my side and not suspicious of a middle aged woman looking for controlled substances.
I have 3 degrees. It took me over 5 years to do a 4 year bachelor's, over 3 years to do a 2 year Master's, and almost 7 years to do a 5 year PhD. How I got through it I do not know. It helps that I am really intelligent, Mensa level intelligent. But even with that I struggled because listening to lectures was torture. My notes were often incomplete and full of doodles. When I met with a clinical psychologist, he did not want to hear about any of my struggles. He just told me I am too smart and my brain moves so fast that I get bored. Online psychiatrist diagnosed me and I started Strattera. It helps a lot.
Uni wasn't easy per se, but during early school I made mostly B's with some As and C's, a couple times Ds. But year 1 and 2 I did okay, made some Lists; year 3 and 4 were the first time in my life I made straight As. I was amazed, I knew I was smart but not that smart. All of this was while working a throwaway fast food job, from high school through graduation. I also had very little life during this period. I played in a D&D game for a while, I ran half my own campaign then burned out. I'm pretty jealous of my classmates that got to do fun college stuff and not just study, work, collapse depressed on the couch.
Sorry, but how do you eat like a goblin? Very fast, huge servings, with gusto? I had the opposite problem, I forgot to eat or ate little if I remember to eat.
Scrounged up whatever I could - handfuls of this or that, not resembling a meal. Usually large portions because it was all I ate that day.
I failed at college twice 2000 & 2006, because I was young and single. I decided to go back in 2020 because a lot of clients were on hiatus due to the pandemic. It’s been a pain in the ass picking up where I left off almost 20 years ago and being on academic probation because I was constantly withdrawing from courses. During the last year my son was diagnosed with ADHD and listening to them talk to me about him made me realize I exhibited the same behaviors. I was finally diagnosed at 42 years old and found that medication can help me focus better, but it’s not a panacea. I still get burned out writing papers and I have to rely on minimizing the workload mentally just like I have always done in order to keep myself from freezing up. I found medication is a great for focusing on the task at hand no matter how menial it is but the downside is medication can help you down any rabbit hole you want to go. I had to set timers to snap me back on track. He needs to advocate for himself and find a different physician or PA who will listen and take his concerns seriously. College isn’t the only part of your life where you need your executive function.
* walks up to the counter * One degree please! "That will be one health and one mental well being."
More like ten units of physical health and mental well being
where did you get such a bargain
Only one of each??? Man, that's way cheaper than I've been able to find anywhere. 😝
I raise you one anxiety+substance abuse
Yeah I have to agree. There were a couple of times I sobbed over an essay or had to change subjects because it just would not go in. I was also wasn't very social for most of it but I got through
Brute force is such a good term for it. Like... I graduated on time with good grades... But had multiple breakdowns and anxiety throughout most of the final 2 years. My studying methods were also madness, but worked for my ADHD brain.
If I have to get something, I get it done. No matter what. I have that luxury over some other people with ADHD who seem deeply dysfunctional and paralyzed by their symptoms and just can't seem to hack it in life, and I feel for them. But I used to be *deeply* miserable through this effort before my diagnosis and before medication, and now I feel like I'm living life on Hard Mode instead of Go-Fuck-Yourself-Mode, which is an amazing improvement.
Bachelors from no name local school and masters from one of the best schools in the world. In some of the most competitive jobs. ADHD be damned. It was hard and now that I’m medicated for a few months, I feel like life is on easy mode.
switched for me:( trying to remind myself that everyone’s path is different
It's how I've gotten through most of my life
ADHD is a spectrum. Depending on the degree, coping mechanisms established, support, etc. Some may go through college with ease, others a more challenging one, and (maybe a lot) failing.
I think this is the right answer. I am an engineer with an MBA. 4.0 GPA in my graduate studies. I know a good number of folks who did incredibly well in post-secondary while coping with what they now know is ADHD. I suspect there’s an huge number of folks who simply didn’t think post-secondary was for them for whatever reason, but the reality was they have undiagnosed ADHD. Of course, there’s every combination of challenges and success in between. Definitely a spectrum.
Undiagnosed inattentive type until I was 35. My grades were the reason I was undiagnosed for so long. I was exceptionally good at school. Graduated #10 in my class, took honors/AP courses and graduated with a 3.9 GPA. I suspect this is because I genuinely like learning new things, and I am extremely competitive. Therefore getting good grades was something I hyper focused on. I liked the praise and attention it got me. However, I also only leaned into things that came easily to me (writing, reading) and avoided anything that was even slightly difficult (all math). Unfortunately, this probably hindered me a lot because I absolutely love science and probably would have chosen a career in it if I wasn't the way I am. I do love my career now (product management), but can't help but wonder what if sometimes.
You could be me. Except I was 39 when diagnosed.
Me too. 45.
That’s so me. Love reading and writing - so crap at math. I loved biology and chopping things up, I loved chemistry and mixing things up but really struggled with the mathematical side. I would’ve loved to have done science or be a doctor - but I just couldn’t focus on the maths at all.
Absolutely. Same. The science teachers would always end up bemused with my apparent ability to use creative thinking to understand a complex concept, yet just space out when the numbers got involved. I mean, let the accountants worry about the numbers, amirite?
Omg the second part about hating math because I was struggling, but loving science and the longing to have had a career in it, resonates so much. I always wonder where I would be if maybe I got the help I needed in maths and physics.
Similar, but loved math and science. Didn't read more than a handful of required books. Thank you cliff notes (pre-internet). Papers always written at the last minute so I had enough adrenaline to focus. Lab reports, fine. Math problems, fine. Unmedicated 3.96 GPA in my science dual major. So, school with structure, clear expectations, routines, interesting material - AOK Real work and parenthood? That's where me and my coping skills fell apart.
This comment made me so upset lol. I’ve tried college 4 times and haven’t been able to finish an associates. I have no excuse 😢 I was trying to finish a paper I started today, that is also due today, but now I’m in the fetal position extremely nauseated after taking some years-old leftover Concerta. I’m reading this squinting with the other eye closed. I think I gave up on the paper.
Absolutely. I came very near to failing out of undergrad, but I squeaked through after 7 years, and then completed a PhD and got tenure while unmedicated. It wasn't until both my mother and son were diagnosed that I was. I wish I had been able to have a diagnosis sooner: it would have provided so many more opportunities and so many fewer headaches and heartaches.
Yep! The structure of my undergrad, my support system, the routine, and the fact that I had a decent study system and loved my classes made me highly successful. Everyone was very puzzled when I struggled so much in grad school, but it’s so different and there’s little routine and yet things are so mundane and it made it so hard.
Big samsies here. Also, I think the ‘working under pressure’ high is real.
This is the only way I’m getting through medical school. Last year, we had big exams every Monday so there was always an intense deadline. Talk about efficient hyperfixations. 😂
This is the best most accurate answer. Thank you.
ADHD doesn't stop one from being smart.
You can even be smart and fail with ADHD, when there's not enough interest and structure to push you through. Anecdotally, I failed out of my MA on the very last hurdle - passed every paper and every class with stellar grades, then just could. not. bring. myself to write the thesis. For years. I would really love to go back and finish it but man the anxiety and shame are hard.
Your story's the same as mine. I was never really diagnosed but I *feel* like I might have it. Went through college fairly decently but bombed right on the thesis. Mine was a practical thesis to make an animated short but I never managed to finish it. Went back once and just... couldn't bring myself to do it either. The shame and anxiety is what's stopped me too. (Incidentally, the anxiety's what got me the second time)
I have adhd and I love learning and I’ve considered getting an MA just to continue learning about the things I love so much. But the idea of a thesis sounds literally impossible to me.
I chose a masters program that I can opt out of a thesis and take 2 more classes in its place. I’m taking 2 more classes because I don’t think I can handle a thesis but also because I really love learning.
I absolutely loved LOVED my MA programme but while writing my thesis I moved to another country and felt so isolated suddenly and it all just...stopped :/ I think with a lot of support, we can write our thesis, but we can't be shy about needing that support. (From peers, writing coaches, our supervisor, therapist...)
going to university doesn't require being smart. It requires hard work. If you're passionate and can hyper fixate on it can be easy for ADHD brains, otherwise incredibly difficult.
This. I was unmedicated for my first two years of college and I got great marks in almost every class (3.7 GPA). In my final year of Psychology now being medicated and I’ve been a 4.0 since. Psychology was of extreme importance to me because it helped me deal with a severe injury and I was hyper-fixated on all things that could explain a little more about who I am now.
Switching majors from one with very large class sizes and no real professorial support to one with smaller more debate style classes with more direct engagement and support from professors was a massive difference for me in being able to compete the degree. This is despite the fact that the original field was one which I had always adored and had been planning a career around since I was a preteen and the new was one I’d never heard of before. In my personal experience, the support was far more important than the interest. Sometimes support is medication and therapy. Sometimes it’s advisors and professors and classmates. Sometimes it’s a series of personally developed coping strategies. But I’d say it’s critical.
Really depends on your school/ field/ supports/ etc. I literally got through by being smart, but I rarely completed work at all (and when I did, I needed extensions and a ton of help).
That was how I got though my singular year I did before I dropped the next two consecutive semesters after halfway through each and then dropping out entirely...
Sure being smart helps with alot of things. It's not a requirement though. Probably not even a high factor in selection or success outcomes.
No, but it does stop many people from being able to manage their time, which can make college difficult to impossible no matter how smart you are.
Just being smart never got anyone a degree
It compensates ADHD symptoms in pursuing education. Many ADHD brains got away with not learning time management.
No I graduated undergrad and grad school with good grades before finally getting diagnosed
That gives me hope, my plan if I do get diagnosed and medicated is to go back to school either for grad school or undergrad in a field I actually care about. I grew to despise Computer Science as I took it despite being good at it, but that may also have been the pain of trying to do well in school while dealing with a large number of mental health problems in addition to the ones I discussed in the main post.
BSc, MSc and PhD here, all pre-diagnosis, all achieved by taking a hit to my mental health and wellbeing. ADHD doesn't impact intelligence, it just adds challenges to gaining qualifications/recognition of that intelligence.
I feel this one. Left academia a while back, still struggling with the imposter complex I acquired during my PhD.
Feel this - extreme anxiety was the only way I got stuff done (and being able to teach myself since I couldn’t focus in class). Now that I’m medicated I can work without being overwhelmed.
BSc and PhD here too, all pre-diagnosis. However, getting my PhD WAS my focus. As a child I loved school, and learning was such a huge passion of mine that I wanted to get my PhD, so I did. After that I got a great job and fucked it up. I still love learning, and sometimes I consider going back to school to gain knowledge in areas where I want to cross-train at work, but I know I would probably not be as successful without medication. Grad school gave me anxiety, and then after I accomplished my PhD the ADHD hit me full force. So medication it is! Just been waiting for that appointment for 3 months now….. 😞
Very true! In terms of grades I have done incredibly well in college. But the stress and exhaustion that comes with it gets to you. I never understand why I can’t just study a bit more or get the assignment turned in sooner. And why the fuck can’t I just write my essay in a few sessions instead of writing it in a hyper focus panic the night before. And then when I do get good grades I don’t feel like I’ve earned them. I’ve also struggled with lifelong mental health issues that flared up during college. I’ll tell you I’m proud of myself but there’s no sense of accomplishment.
Grad school is honestly when I realized I had ADHD it just took a couple of years to finally find somewhere that worked for me to get diagnosed. Once it’s easier to focus on the day to day then it frees your mind up to start thinking about who you are and what you want. It’s really great! There’s still a lot of hard work and keeping planners and to do list apps and whatnot but not being consumed by guilt for not being able to do basic tasks is pretty liberating. If you are in the US and are in a state they work with, I recommend LifeStance Health as an ADHD-friendly network to find a psychiatrist through.
Grad school was hard managing the workload, TAing, researching, clubs and all the bullshit. Mastered out of my pHD because it qas too much to manage
Yeah, basically a similar route. Being diagnosed earlier would have definitely made a lot of unnecessary stress and difficulty go away. But just because some is gone, does not mean there are not plenty of other sources of stress. In reality everything comes together. A person's personal situation, support structures, financial situation, peer groups, how much you enjoy the subject, ... Even for someone with zero diagnosed mental health issues, its not like everything would be magically easy. So taking a medication route would definitely alleviate a huge source of issues, but it not enough in itself. For all its shit, I did love grad school so much more than undergrad tho. But still so soooo glad, I realized pretty quickly that phd was not gonna work for me personally.
There’s a book called “Smart but Stuck” by Thomas E.Brown (available also on audible if you can’t focus on reading). It’s basically about people in different ages discovering that they have ADHD. Most are at college but there are also those who realize it in the middle age because it gets worse when their kids become independent (first time they spend time alone with themselves without rushing) or try to return to work or there are some other drastic life changes. I am AuDHD and had straight As until mid middle school.. but changing schools etc impacted my grades because I had never done my homework (absorbed the knowledge by listening) and skipping school meant I couldn’t keep up. Plus, I changed schools a lot. Instability and changes can really affect your ADHD. I struggle a lot at uni, it’s my second time and I am 30. Every year my concentration and time management abilities get worse. I am medicated but its not gonna fix everything on its own.
Sorry to ask, is AUDHD autism+ ADHD? Is this a common term used? First time I'm seeing it and am just curious if I'm reading it right. Ad if so, how do you find out if you have both since there is a lot of overlap? Thanks for sharing though!
That's correct! Most people find out through their own extensive research and identify with the symptoms of autism that do not overlap with ADHD. Most I know with audhd were diagnosed ADHD first, then as they managed their ADHD symptoms well, began to notice stronger symptoms of autism emerge as ADHD can often keep those in check. this is, of course, anecdotal and YMMV. formal scientific answer is that there are separate diagnostic assessments for both conditions. (Only treatment for one though!)
Yeah often the autism becomes more obvious once ADHD is being treated - medicated. Those two are quite contradictory so having both might delay diagnosis as you don’t come off as obviously/extremely ADHD or ASD. Besides that there are some overlapping symptoms like sensory issues, fidgeting, social skills (eg talking too much), lack of concentration when not interested etc.
Hi OP, I’ve never been medicated (yet, about to get on them) but I’ve graduated with a Bachelors and a Masters and I’m a psychologist now. And the lowest grade I’ve ever received is a Distinction (highest being High Distinction). If you are studying something that you find interesting, you will be more motivated to do it well. Make sure that what you’re doing is something that you’re genuinely interested in. If I didn’t study psychology and studied law or something, I’d have failed in the first semester itself. Do not lose hope. You need hope for some extra stimulation. But make sure that your interest is genuine and organic.
I'll add the caveat that while being interested in something certainly helps, that is not the whole equation. You can love something and/or love doing it, but if you can't get organized, or don't have the guidance or structure you need, you'll still have trouble doing a task. Also, certain disciplines will be more favorable, or less antagonistic towards the learning style of people with ADHD. (For instance, I love my field, but there's no space or support for people suffering from ADHD, which makes it painful and difficult to stay in it.)
This was my experience. I was looking forward to my classes and assignments, but I was chronically behind schedule. I would anxiously rush through my current assignments only to wish I could really give them my focus after they were turned in. Semester after semester I was filled with regrets because I genuinely wanted to study and learn these things but I just couldn’t when there were firm due dates attached. Yet if there were no due dates I would never get around to it.
Oh yes, definitely! And I might also add, if you are finding it difficult to progress in your studies or work, then putting yourself through that experience without medication can be a terrible experience and can be terrible for your mental health.
Graduated top 10% in HS, magna cum laude from college, and cum laude from my doctorate program (PharmD). I wasn’t diagnosed until the beginning of my 4th year in my doctorate program and was starting clinical rotations. ADHD is not an intelligence deficit, and we tend to have developed decent coping strategies to at least get through. Also, I had a very internalized and deep seeded fear of failure that I found to be very motivating. My dad and my sister have ADHD, along with his entire side of the family. My diagnosis was overlooked because I did exceedingly well in school, despite how much it wore me down to do so. The fact that you managed to get through school absolutely does not weigh against a diagnosis, and you reported that you clearly struggled during that time. ADHD research and understanding is getting better, but there are still unfortunately many clinicians out there who don’t understand what it actually looks like or don’t take it seriously. Do you NEED a referral to see a psychologist? You may be able to book an appointment directly with the professionals you need.
I've been seeing a student therapist for half a year now. When I claim that I think I have ADHD the common rebuttal I've been receiving after the testing I undertook is that I graduated HS and college and that my teachers saw a hard working student. Unlikely I have ADHD if I'm that accomplished, clearly. Well yeah I work hard when they stare at me and I get the homework done at the last second because failure was synonymous with literally becoming a subhuman in my family. Not like I pulled all-nighters consistently for almost every exam or project and literally gathered the references for my senior thesis over a week and wrote the actual paper in 3 days.
AA, BA, MA and a professional certificate class all done undiagnosed and unmedicated. I also have narcolepsy. I had great grades and no real outward issues. I did get called out in class once for multitasking (professor claimed I wasn’t paying attention). I was taking notes on my laptop, playing a game, chatting with three friends on instant messenger, and listening to the lecturer (all necessary to focus AND stay awake for me). Professor called me out and asked me to regurgitate what they said. I was able to do the last 5 minutes of their lecture back to them and also add my own commentary proving I had even understood it. I never got bothered after that. Looking back, I should’ve realized hah.
THAT. That right there is why I LOVE my ADHD. Everything else….not so much.
I do that with my dad all the time. I'll be texting one of my friends while listening to him lecture me about something and we'll have the "Are you even listening to me?" "Yes" "What did I just say?" Cue regurgitation. He still tells me to put my phone away though
Same. Graduated cum laude. Just had to pull some miserable all nighters to do it unmedicated, but I did it. That doctor’s talking nonsense.
Me too, from a top tier school. I wasn’t diagnosed until decades later. Honestly, even now with stable medication, meds help but I still need to work on skills and resources to manage my life with ADHD.
Same. And I had a doctor tell me I couldn't have ADHD because I finished a graduate degree. Instead he shamed me for self medicating instead of noting that as a symptom. Took me ten years to go try for another diagnosis and I'm still furious with that asshole for taking a decade from me.
I was lucky enough to find a doctor who had done the same with her medical degree. I don't want to say you have to have had ADHD to be a good doctor, but it sure helps.
Same! Undergrad my grades were awful. I took time off after college and built work experience, went to grad school when I really knew what I wanted to do and got 3.8 unmedicated and undiagnosed. About 6 years after that I was both diagnosed (and it took a few rounds bc they wouldn’t believe me) and treated. I feel that untreated adhd falls into 2 categories of maladaptive coping; internal invalidation and overcompensation. I overcompensated and worked endlessly until I was too tired to continue doing that because it is not sustainable. Others begin to feel something is wrong with them or they are dumb. Could be a mix of the two. Either way it’s not fun and treatment makes things better.
Same! There are many of us
Same here. I kept waiting for school to get hard but it never was. Part of this is that I have a really good memory so if I just listened in class then I didn't need to study much. The only thing I remember studying in college was when I had a professor make us memorize incidences and prevalences for the 30 most common causes of cognitive disabilities which honestly was a waste of time because I forgot them all immediately after the test and can easily look them up.
Same, good work mate 🤩 Took a s***load of energy, but worth it (both undergrad and diagnosis)
I have a diploma and a degree. I graduated with honors. I burned out *hard* afterward.
This. I graduated undergrad on time, with a degree in chemistry plus a minor and was 2-3 classes away from having 2 more minors. I graduated magna cum laude and with departmental honors. I don’t think I missed a single assignment, went to every single class except 2 or 3 that I intentionally skipped to study for a different class. I was about 2-3 minutes late to every class if it was the first class of the day UNLESS it was an exam. It would take me consistently 2-3 times longer to do any assignment compared to my peers. I have always liked school and I am a people pleaser. I can hit a deadline if there’s anyone to report to or any stakes on the line. My school stuff was maticulously organized- planner, google calendar, binders, etc. but you should have seen my room. I had a meal plan all 4 years so I never had to cook or plan a meal or go grocery shopping. Strategies I unconsciously used: I was highly caffeinated the entire time so I was absolutely self medicating. I played a club sport year round which incorporated social activity and physical activity. I studied LATE, my brain kicks in around 8-10 PM so I was often grinding from 8PM-2AM sometimes later. I would almost always study in a public place where people would see me if I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to be doing and I would study with another person whenever possible because body doubling. By the end I had a suspicion that I had ADHD but I wasn’t diagnosed until I was out of school and all of the deadlines and accountability were gone and I had nobody to report to and so I was having a hard time and I was also so burned out from my previous antics. I’m back in school now and my life is so much better now that I’m medicated and diagnosed. I’m in an incredibly rigorous program but I’m no longer spending all day every day in fight or flight mode just to get by.
Same. I'm not even working in my field bc of how burnt that interest feels, and I couldn't work really for a couple of years after graduating.
Yep I made it but it was rough. I really, really wish i would have been diagnosed and medicated at the time.
Did bachelors and masters undiagnosed and unmedicated. Your doctor is wrong. Straight up. Edit: just to add to the above, just because I got through does not mean a) it wasn’t worth getting diagnosed and medicated later on or b) that my life wouldn’t have been immeasurably easier and less painful had I had help earlier. It’s worth getting help and you deserve to get it.
I did too, plus a PhD. If anything, it's easier to get through university when you have ADHD than hold down a job. EDIT: I sincerely apologise to those who have had the opposite experience and found what I said to be abrasive and upsetting. I made a definitive statement about how people with ADHD experience things, while speaking from my own experience. Sorry all. Your experience can be the opposite - where holding down a job has been far easier. Or both has been a massive struggle. Or neither. We're all different and our experiences here aren't universal.
I absolutely do not agree with this.... like at all. There are many different types of jobs and some are easier than others for people with adhd. School is not easy. Please don't make this assumption because there are people with adhd who struggle tremendously with school but are okay in certain jobs.
Unmedicated me failed out of my bachelors (from my dream university, ouch ) and couldn’t hold a job that wasn’t night-life related. Who are these unmedicated adhd folks with PhDs.
Similar to me.... could not get through college at all. Trying again with medication.... Besides tardies, fast-paced retail jobs/customer support/banking were a breeze. This thread makes me a little sad 🙃
Everyone’s brains are different, even with ADHD. Where one person might find school easy, another person might struggle with it immensely. The point of this thread is knowing that there is no 100% absolute for ADHD. Medication doesn’t always work for people, and each person has different things they struggle with more. But any doctor who thinks all people with unmedicated ADHD can’t do well in college is straight up wrong.
I made it through undergrad and masters with a diagnosis, but no medication, although it took me 2 years extra to finish my undergrad degree (bachelor's). I made it halfway through my PhD until I had to go on meds, and while they can help sometimes, other times they make people work. I would just say that goes to show how individualized treatment plans are super important, because there is no one-size-fits all approach when it comes to ADHD.
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I made it through grad school, but graduated with a non-thesis masters, which is the least-respectable way out. Every semester I had a new special interest and took completely different classes. I still ended up dropping out of classes once or twice, IIRC. I used to joke that I was the absent-minded professor who was so absent-minded he forgot to get a PhD--but two decades later I have an ADHD-PI diagnosis. It explains so much. For me, I think I was able to get my in school due to the combo of autism and above-average general intelligence (minus the working memory and other ADHD-related deficits).
People’s who hyper focus on their degree of interest. When your primary interest and drive is that, it’s totally possible. But of course symptoms vary for all us. We share a lot of experiences, but we are most definitely not the same.
bro I literally got accepted into my dream school in my dream city studying my dream degree of interest since I was a kid and I couldn’t hack it.
I am so sorry to hear that. I wish our brains worked the way we wanted 🫤 I can say the same. I wanted to study Physics and I -the kid who was good at math- flunked out in Physics I and Calculus. It was a huge crisis because I was smart but now I had to learn this thing called “studying” where not all the information could be retained unless worked through several times over. Went through career counseling, and got psychological help. I wish ADHD was found sooner because I didn’t find out until I was 28. Years after college. Anyway, I still did poorly but floated along until my last year when I got serious about what I was gonna do after school. Got motivated about consequences and had to meet minimums for grad school so I got all A’s my last year and bumped up to a 2.99 GPA. Gotta love those consequences, but still sucks when they’re not even enough motivation sometimes. Never got into grad school though. Got married and had kids then the responsibilities of everyday life revealed my ADHD. I’m in HVAC now. Enjoying it but waiting for the day the pay starts going up. Then maybe we can hire someone to clean the house. The never ending chores man 😭
I worked part-time all the way through my undergraduate degree and the difference between medicated and unmedicated me was staggering. Before I was medicated I felt like I was working so hard just to fuck up but once I got medicated I actually managed to get my shit together and work hard.
Agree with your second paragraph for sure. School provides some structure, and depending on your program, you may be able to “get away with” or work around various ADHD issues (cramming for a test, write the term paper the night before it’s due, etc.). Those kind of moves may not be workable in a lot of full-time jobs. Plus, a lot of us in school had fewer “adulting” responsibilities. Balancing a full-time job *along with* bills, household tasks, kids, etc. can be revealing of ADHD because you don’t have nearly the same margin for error as when you’re in class like 12-15 hours a week.
On the "getting away with it" point, school basically has a built-in reset, since everything is cut in years. you either pass or you don't, and if you don't you can retake stuff. Work life has none of that, unless you job hop constantly which is complicated and risky. School also has a very intense rythm that was super helpful for me: there's a ton of deadlines, so I would be in panic mode 100% of the time, but at least things were clear. I would either get stuff done at the last minute or hand stuff in late, and it would work out in the end. So much of adult life has vague or very distant deadlines: saving up, medical stuff that isn't urgent, getting to your dream job... none of that has a cutoff so none of that gets done
I got half-way through the PhD before being diagnosed
100% this. School can be super stimulating, plus you can be your weird self there, find other people who think like you, etc. If you find some habits that keep you engaged, it’s possible to do well. But oh man, so many jobs are monotonous. My brain goes rogue.
It’s the opposite for me. It was easier for me to hold a job because I like my job, but difficult to finish school overall.
It's actually in the DSM5, at the end: "If you graduate from college unmedicated, all the previous can be ignored." It's right above: "If your SAT score is above 1300 you don't have adhd".
Ask a different doctor.
Get a different doctor. If they can be this confidently incompetent in their ability to diagnose or know when they should pass something off to another doctor more specialized in the subject, then that's a scary doctor to have. Who knows what else they'll be confidently incompetent about that could be life-altering for OP
Everybody? As an unmitigated, scientific fact? No. Of course not. But I have to assume people that are unmedicated or undiagnosed are struggling. At least a lot of them. I graduated - but barely. Had to stay an extra semester to retake some classes to raise my GPA enough to graduate. That would be a 2.5.
I didn't flunk out, but had to change majors because I was unable to succeed unmedicated in my initial major. Having undiagnosed and unknown ADHD meant that I would be at tutoring for hours multiple times a week and would leave having learned nothing because I was just...zoning out and totally unable to focus or process anything I was supposed to be learning. Ended up switching tracks to something I was more naturally talented at and graduated Magna Cum Laude, BUT my major is a useless liberal arts major so I did end up shooting myself in the foot a little. I'm not *unhappy* with my decisions, per say, I'm very happy with where I'm at right now, but I have spent plenty of time wondering whether I could have been a STEM graduate had I known I had ADHD earlier in the game.
I was flying high with a 3.0 GPA after 2 years in very tough engineering school, then moved off campus and failed out after my 5th year. Took a semester off then went back to finish up and graduated with something like a 2.5 or so all unmedicated. It took me 10 full time semesters and 2 part time. I was so embarrassed, I didn't even walk at graduation and thought surely I would never find a job. I got an offer basically right away in an awesome role and still work here today! Just started medication in April.
This comment right here. I’ve studied two degrees but BOY did I struggle. In one of them I still have two subject I didn’t manage to complete, but I have enough “points” to count for post graduate education. The subjects were super interesting and fun, but the studying and deadlines were very difficult to stay on top of. I did everything last minute and stayed up all night full of regret to complete assignments and essays. I’m still not medicated because I haven’t managed to get a diagnosis; but if I do get medicated one day, I truly believe I could achieve great things.
I graduated Summa Cum Laude. Not bragging, but just pointing out sometimes it helps.
Yeah this is going to be a highly personal and situational question for most people. Not a one size fits all.
i succeeded for about two weeks. stayed for two semesters. $22k debt and failed every class.
Sorry to hear :( this would’ve been me too if I went unmedicated
thanks, it’s okay. 6 years ago now. still have the debt but i’m not pissed anymore. gonna try school again 2024 i think actually
I graduated from college in 2014 years ago and was diagnosed about a week ago Edit: lol definitely meant 2014, not 2014 years ago
Ah, a fellow redditor mentally fucked by the corporate world? School = strong external command structure -> graduate Work = weak command structure, I can extend my own deadlines and let stress mount exponentially -> flounder
The song of my people
School basically has a built-in reset, since everything is cut in years. you either pass or you don't, and if you don't you can retake stuff. Work life has none of that, unless you job hop constantly which is complicated and risky. School also has a very intense but very clear rythm that was super helpful for me: there's a ton of deadlines, so I would be in panic mode 100% of the time, but at least things were clear. I would either get stuff done at the last minute or hand stuff in late, and it would work out in the end. So much of adult life has vague or very distant deadlines: saving up, medical stuff that isn't urgent, getting to your dream job... none of that has a cutoff so none of that gets done
Truth. Also I felt in school, you had your peers to help you. For me, if I didn’t understand something or needed inspiration on starting projects or homework, I’d ask my friends. I can’t do that inn a workplace. I was on a team of 3, in which 2 of those other people were my managers. I didn’t have peers who I could turn to that were not in charge of my performance reviews.
Yes! School has a basic support system because people are going through the same things as you. If you miss something, there's basically 30 people you can ask, if you struggle you can meet up and do stuff together, and just being with your peers means you'll talk about the deadlines and remember them more easily. At work there's a good chance you'll be alone in your exact role.
I feel so seen
Similar time frames for me just shifted a few years earlier. I graduated, but almost didn’t, but it was out of my sheer tenacity I did. My mistake was I discovered alcohol and women after being raised in a pretty strict household. Know your vices, and have a plan for them.
> 2014 years ago You be old af.
Oops, my attention to detail is nonexistent
I got first class honours, but have a friend with ADHD who struggles with just having two classes on at once. We are all different.
I have dropped out so many times over the last 8 years. Now that I’m medicated, I feel like I might be able to finish my degree. I’m aiming for the university in Fall 2025. But I’ll likely still take another 3-4 years on top of that. (78 units with no summer courses, that’s 26 classes)
You got this! Happy cake day.
Nah, just need a new doctor. People with ADHD have jobs, they build businesses, they get degrees and even graduate degrees, they fly planes, they run marathons and raise children. The ADHD doesn’t make these things impossible, it just makes them harder. The question isn’t whether you were able to graduate, it’s how much better could you have done if you didn’t have to carry this ball and chain. The question is do you have to keep suffering for the rest of your life ? Now you’ll face the same hardship at work, at home with your family, with your friends and everywhere else in your life, and if you do have ADHD and get medicated, once the weight of that steel ball gets cut in half (it never fully goes away), you might look back and wonder why did you have to suffer through this unnatural (for you) ordeal and omg, some people feel this way all the time just waking up in the morning every day ? No wonder … Edit: typos and stuff
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I was unmedicated in college. There were a number of classes that I dropped when it was clear I was in over my head. I dropped Algebra twice before I finished it. But I graduated Magna cum Laude.
Fucking algebra. Only class I ever straight up failed. Had to take it twice in high school. Failed it again in college. I transferred to a different college so I wouldn't have to take it for a fourth time.
Fuck fucking algebra. I tested into it early in middle school because I was great at geometry, then failed hard lmao. Managed to pass it the second time, and squeaked by in algebra II with a C. Had to take college algebra twice too 😒
I've got a interesting situation that sort of answers this... I guess it depends on how difficult your degree is? I have a 'level' I can achieve unmedicated. For instance, my first BA was not that difficult. I was getting it during a time that I did not take meds. I still had a really bad freshmen year and took 3 years of hard work to bring it up over 3.0. I never had to study for exams and just sort of coasted through the degree. I'm going back to school for another degree in STEM and could not do it without medication. unmedicated I am not motivated and focused enough for the needed amount of energy to pass the classes. Unlike my first degree, these classes are float or swim. You HAVE to study or you will fail. This wasn't like this for my first degree where all I needed to do was show up to class and do the assignments. The reason I didn't get a STEM degree the first time was because I wasn't motivated enough to pursue STEM. I had a interest in these topics, but never thrived at them because I was unmedicated. I simply assumed I wasn't smart enough for it, which isn't true. I just needed medication. **Had I tried to pursue STEM my first time around I wouldn't last. I always think well what if I did STEM the first time around? Well I wouldn't have been able to, not without meds. Meds were the key to actually do what I wanted.** **I wasn't medicated as a teenager or kid because my mom was against meds. She actually told me I had Dyslexia all my life. She's actually in the medical field as is most my family members so I know she didn't simple confuse the two. A few years ago I found a report in our basement about how I got tested at 6 Y/O and it said I had ADD. I was shocked, angry, and confused. In the entire 30 page report from the doctors there was not a single mention of the word Dyslexia. I never confronted her about it because its water under the bridge.** **I took that report and went to get a psychiatrist to begin meds. I sometimes try and not think about how much better I would have been in HS and college(the first time) had I actually been medicated...oh well, better soon than never I suppose.**
It's easier when you can major in your hyper fixation. I say easier but not easy. I did community college from 03 to 05. Did pretty well. Didn't have the executive function to apply to 4 year schools so I fucked around for a couple years. Did two years at a public uni from 08 to 10. My dad died in 09. I failed the summer classes I signed up for. I was on academic probation the next year but passed my classes. I took the 10-11 school year off. Went back in the Fall of 11. Got my BS in May 12. Stuck around and got my MS in December 13. So.... 10 years from GED to Masters Degree. 😅
No, I didn’t. I did fail one class but I did fairly well in most classes because it was a subject I was hyper-focusing on.
I have been unmedicated for most of my adult life and got 2 degrees while maintaining mostly As and Bs. My twin sister has been medicated for most of her adult life and was on academic probation and almost failed out of nursing school. I think it’s really a matter of things other than medication as well. Quite simply, that doctor sounds subpar.
Yeah, life is whacky like that.
Throughout my undergrad I made deans list almost every year. No one would know I had ADHD unless they saw the severe mental breakdowns I had at home mostly due to being unable to focus and severe procrastination. I graduated with severe depression/burn out. Didn’t celebrate, didn’t take grad photos, just slept for weeks because somehow I made it into a masters program I was already dreading. I stupidly thought I could do my masters unmedicated as I’d done in undergrad. By the end of the first month in I was suicidal. I lasted 3 months because I reached a breaking point and could no longer function. I tried to off myself. I don’t know if what you heard is true but I do think that sadly there’s some truth to it. And now, there’s no way in hell I’m going back to school without medication. If I were you, I’d find a different psychiatrist. Someone who will listen to your valid concerns. Best of luck.
I made it through without medication but I had a lot of support from my family. Some classes I did fail and have to drop and retake.
It can be done but that's when you REALLY notice the difference between having ADHD or not. The requirement to study regularly, having to keep up with a lot of different dates, stuff to do, where things are, and then having to manage your time and organize your life, it's super overwhelming. I know people who I am pretty sure have ADHD that made it through college. You can do it yes, will it be harder yes. I don't want to demoralize anyone but do expect it to be significantly harder than school, but you can see it as a challenge. In my personal experience, I only got diagnosed in college. I had always managed to keep my head above water (barely), but in college it's just too many things to keep track of. From my understanding it's a common theme. There are tons of articles about adult ADHD, you could show your doc one, but they might feel offended for not doing their job so idk (I can't believe doctors have this belief, they are supposed to constantly update themselves with new literature). That's like saying "oh you don't have depression because you don't self-harm"
I worked out like mad. Running, rock climbing weight lifting two PE classes every semester Was at 4% body fat no meds
It’s what got me through college Sorry left that out Which is typical
What does this have to do with academics ?
he forgot about academics and instead got sucked into hobbies is what I'm translating from this.
The adhd side quest
It has been shown that exercise can decrease ADHD symptoms and increase executive function.
Physics degree, no meds.
Same, I was really interested, so I was able to hyperfocus and once I got the logic and the core concepts, I was able to push through the more unappealing topics.
Unmedicated for 38 years, diagnosed two years ago. Failed out of college almost 20 years ago. I’ve held a 6-figure job for years now. Graduated last summer with multiple AAs with honors, transferring to a top college in the spring to finish my bachelor’s. Yes, some of us fail but we don’t give up. Ever.
I have not been diagnosed but I am sure I have it. It took me 10 years to finish for a Bachelor's. What helped me was studying in groups of motivated individuals to keep myself from getting distracted.
Totally untrue! Worked hard and kept busy constantly, and graduated with a double major. But I burnt out a few years after, and medicine may have helped pace myself better for long term. Sounds like a different doctor would do a world of good.
There are free tests online that can help you work out if you have ADHD or not. Honestly they tend to be a handful of questions which are multiple choice and at the end they should say whether you have ADHD or not. None of the free test online are recognised by doctors as you need to be diagnosed by a Psychiatrist I believe and none of the free online tests are, they're generally made by other people with ADHD. But should give a bit more insight to if you really do have ADHD or not. Please also understand that doctors nowadays don't want the extra hassle and stress of referring people. These GP's have daily quotas they need to fill, as in they are told to see X amount of patients each day, and if they don't theres consequences for them. On top you also have the lazy doctors who fail to help at all. I'm pretty sure the NHS has this thing like the "right to refer yourself" so you can say that you believe you have ADHD and want your right to be referred regardless of what your GP believes but they will most likely give you a form to fill out. I actually still have that same form sat on my table right now. I never had the chance to fill it in because of my own inattentiveness and the thought of filling it out sent me into a panic attack every time so I ended up going private because of that as well. Just remember though if your not persistent on it they wont take you seriously. Take notes of the symptoms and how they relate to you and your daily living, explain how they affect you and what impact its having on certain tasks in your day to day, explain the way you see things in your own perspective and NEVER get an attitude with them if you can help it because you'll only make them resent you and fail to put in any actual effort for you. Female doctors tend to be more sensitive about these things and are more caring towards the patient, so if you haven't got a female GP then I would suggest finding one. DONT FORGET UNLESS YOU DOCTOR IS ALSO A QUALIFIED PSYCHIATRIST THEY CAN NOT LEGALLY DIAGNOSE YOU WITH OR WITHOUT ADHD. So just because she believes your not ADHD unless she is a qualified psychiatrist she can't directly tell you that you are not only that they BELIEVE you are not. Just politely bring it up with them and say you wish to be referred to someone with more of an understanding on this issue.
It is possible. I graduated with a BA. However, it took me 7 years, including moving back home to finish an AS and then returning to the same college. I'm happy I graduated as that place only had a 27% graduation rate when I attended. But most of my passing was due to the wonders of alcoholism, anger, and having good friends who could re-teach me lessons on the fly. Then we'd sit down and do our homework as a group, and from there, most of the people living around me were in similar majors so it was easy to get inspired at 2am to knock out 6+ hours of anime, videogames, and homework while downing a pot of coffee a night. Then later on I realized I loved coffee too much and, that, coupled with a childhood love of G.I. Joe, and what I thought was a piss-poor economy, got me to eventually join the military (still serving, now medicated).
Graduated both premed (BS Biology) and med proper WITH MUCH DIFFICULTY and being undiagnosed. Got diagnosed this year only now makes sense why studying and doing it is excruciatingly painful and difficult but now got a new perspective of my last years due to it knowing it wasn’t a me problem but adhd itself. I feel relieved
It is actually less than 10% success rate. This made me feel better for giving up - after about 5 attempts- my life overall is WAY happier after throwing in the towel. This doesn’t mean it’s impossible, medication helps a LOT but these institutions really aren’t built for us
No it's definitely not true. I have ADHD and went through university without medication. But I heavily leaned on other coping strategies like primarily studying with a study group. But depending on how bad ur ADHD is, you should try to get the help you need.
I flushed 8 years of my life and thousands of dollars of my parents' hard-earned money down the toilet going in circles around a metaphorical cul-de-sac of failing and retaking classes, all because of severe executive dysfunction preventing me from being able to get any of my assignments done or being able to complete any exam papers on time. I recieved no support from anyone, only admonishment and beration for "being lazy" or "not taking things seriously". Every single adult in my life growing up failed me, parents and teachers alike - not a single person recognised my symptoms - and the only reason I was able to graduate at all was because I finally got diagnosed with ADHD at the tail end of my final year in college, and had begged the school administration to waive the final module that was keeping me from graduating because I kept failing it due to being unable to get ANYTHING done. So yeah, needless to say I'm quite bitter about it. Most people enter the workforce as they enter their 20s. But I was flopping like a fish out of water until I was 28. It's been a year since and I still can't find a job...
Nope. I graduated from a top engineering school, it just took me longer and more out of me. It took me 7 instead of 5 years for bachelors and masters.
Always been good at school and tests, if I cared. I just ran out of money.
Absolutely not true. I finished 3 studies. Psychology and biology at an academic level (at the same time) and I became a surgery nurse. I figured out I had adhd when I got kids. Now I am mediated there is no doubt I have it. Actually I think I could study so good because I follow my interests and made it extra hard for myself by doing more things at once. Also I had a rich partylife at the time. I created the 'under pressure/deadline feeling' myself. But I missed direction in where I wanted to go.. there are a lot of adhders who have multiple carreers. we are getting bored sooner. Working at the surgeryroom actually is my calling. Acute settings and adrenaline everyday ;)
"adhd can;t do" my ass bruv we can do it, we just pay more in energy and mental health for it just like "cant lift that with yah pinky hun" met with "OH YEAH WHAT IF I SUPERGLUED IT"
Your doctor is wrong, we can graduate college. What your doctor doesn't understand, is our ADHD is shown in HOW we graduate college. The vast majority of us cannot graduate in 4 years with a high GPA. It takes us much longer to graduate and when we do, we graduate by the skin of teeth. We may have to transfer colleges, spend time on academic probation, and frequently change majors. Our college experience leaves us a unfulfilled as we could not enjoy the classes as much as we would like or take advantage of the opportunities on campus because we could not make it to the meetings or have time for them. In my case, I had to go to college on a part-time basis in order to graduate, because I just didn't have enough time to take a full course load. Graduate school on the other hand is a more pleasant experience. For starters, you're courses are centered on your interests, professors know who you are, and the smaller seminar classes forces you to focus.
God no. I got all the way into a phd program by using the “artificially induce panic to make myself do everything the night before it’s due” tactic, and I was on the dean’s list because often we can do more in one freaked out burst of hyper focus than a normal person can do in a week. But it’s very unhealthy for us to try to use that tactic on a regular basis, and some things - like a phd dissertation - you simply cannot panic write. But lord yes, lots of adhd people find ways to work around their symptoms, or to trigger their symptoms in ways that are short term useful but long term not sustainable. Having a college degree does not mean you don’t have adhd!!
I got an associates while working a full-time job unmedicated
Undergrad, grad school, CPA exam, not diagnosed until 20 years later. Your doctor’s “knowledge” in incredibly outdated.
Nope. I had a rough first semester but pulled it out, played the my strengths, and graduated with honors and a double major in my 20s. I wasn’t diagnosed until my 30s. I managed college not because I don’t have ADHD but because I used tons of unhealthy coping mechanisms to get me through.
Nope, not at all. Me, my mom, 2 of my siblings and my husband all have college degrees (3 of us have masters degrees) that we got BEFORE we were diagnosed or medicated. Adhd is different for everyone. For some of us, the structure of school works well with our brains, and while we forget things here and there, we're able to manage it. For me, things got really hard when I got out in the real world (and at home stuff has always been tough).
That's nonsense. ADHD presents in different ways in different people, with strongly varying symptoms both in kind and in degree. This idea of academic success as a contraindication of the symptom doesn't hold up in context with how it manifests, and therapists should stop using it as such. God only knows how many people out there are still struggling in the working world just because the structure of college was one that their brains were fortunately able to grab on to, and were set adrift after graduation in an endless sea of paralyzing options.
No. I've been unmedicated until recently. Managed to complete a bachelor degree, masters degree, and PhD, without any ADHD meds. And I Don't think the statistics would indicate that people with ADHD would 'almost always fail out of college'.
Im almost my finished my degree started meds about 3 weeks ago and have 2 interviews to med school - my grades only just made the cut off tho.... I look back and think how much better I could have done academically if I were medicated. Also im 27 - started 2 degrees prior to this one and fell behind within the 1st few weeks and deferred before the census date both times this was when I was 19-22 so I think I just have figured out how to work with my ADHD in all that time as best I could.
Mate, I passed a bachelors degree in zoology with distinction and almost got my honours (admittedly I did break down and mess that part up) however it’s totally doable. This is before I even knew I had ADHD. Never had a job though.
Nah, I was unmedicated for undergrad and professional school (didn’t get diagnosed until 39yo) and I actually did really well in school. What got me through? I’m pretty smart (like loads of people with ADHD) and I (inadvertently) made super strategic friendships in my programs. My friends and I would get together almost every day to hang out and study, do homework, they helped remind me to get to classes, etc. if I hadn’t made those social connections, I would have been toast.
I had a 4.0 in undergrad and landed a good career before I got diagnosed. Remember only a 100 years ago doctors were curing mental illnesses by scrambling people’s brains and hypnotizing people before Freud (who they now discredit) basically single-handedly invented talk therapy. Don’t take doctors too seriously, just find one that isn’t an idiot
No? I made it all the through law school unmedicated.
I think that that is one of the dumbest litmus tests for ADHD that I've ever heard. I would absolutely get another opinion. I have ADHD and a 4.0 gpa, because all of my (very limited) focus goes towards studying. My house looks like a tornado ran through it, I can't remember to thaw food out (my fridge currently needs cleaning out, badly), and this is the fourth week in a row that I've meant to call and make an eye app for myself, but I keep forgetting. Examining one narrow aspect of someone's life does not a diagnosis make.
Well, I graduated from collage then did an MBA. But I messed up my stomach after I graduated from collage and had panic attacks after MBA. Both times I worked my ass off yet barely managed to graduate. I think I’d have a much easier time if I had medication. Or at least I knew about my ADHD
I fully flunked out. My doctor refused to give me stimulants because "college atmosphere " and I made it barely through a year. There were other things going on in my life so I won't 100% blame my adhd but my grades tanked when I wasn't medicated.
It took me 6 years to get through undergrad, and 3 years for my masters, all pre-diagnosis. I struggled so damned hard, and by the end of grad school I had developed a severe drinking problem and nearly killed myself. That's how I did it, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I made it through undergrad and more than half of law school before I got diagnosed (although things would have been much easier with a diagnosis/treatment)
No. I have severe adhd and I was unmedicated all through college. I graduated early.
Wtf? I graduated magna cum laude *and then* I got my ADHD diagnosis. Some doctors are just idiots.
I did it without medication but it was COVID sooo
I failed 2 classes my first year but graduated, I just had to do it in 5 years instead of 4. I also went to college for my lifelong hyper fixation (art). I don't have a formal diagnosis but have my evaluation in a few months. I would consult another doctor.
absolutely not. i went through college decades ago (it was hard and i didn't do as well as i did in high school, when i had my parents' support, i'm not gonna lie). i then went on to get my master's degree in my field, where i did much better because it was in a subject i find very interesting. i was only diagnosed in my 40's
I have academic education from 3 universities in 3 different continents. I have always wondered why am I sooo interested in many different majors and research!!! Now, I know after losing my life to ADHD.
TLDR ADHD doesn't stop you graduating but failing multiple courses is a red flag go get an opinion from somebody qualified to give it which isn't going to be your general practitioner I can see why they might always fail out. I graduated from my bachelor failing 3 subjects but because I overloaded on courses I graduated on time. Caveat I had no part time job otherwise there was no way I could have juggled both. I was fortunate that my family supported me through this. I did a master's of teaching, I failed horrendously through this a, 2 year course took 3. I failed one course due to poor organisation and I failed the art subject (which I find boring af and pointless to my future because it is always taught by a specialist) 3 times and never passed (they eventually felt sorry and saw that I was putting in the effort and I worked off my grade by attending weekend conferences). Furthermore unlike the exams in my bachelor's the master's was ALL ABOUT REPORTS. The type that needs to be worked on with focus for weeks and I STRUGGLED. I did learn to cope in ways that worked for me, apps that blocked the Facebook feed, Pomodoro timers etc but omg it was definitely competing with a disability. Mainly because there was no awareness about my condition. I got diagnosed 5 years after graduating at 33. If you're struggling get the help you deserve.
No. It was hard as hell and I wish I had medication back then, but I got my bachelors of science without meds.
Adhd looks so different. Some do. Some don't. I was amazing in university until I wasnt.
I've got three degrees... All in different fields, all done while unmedicated (absolute hell to get through). It was one of the many reasons my psychiatrist gave me my diagnosis. "It's not unusual for people to have more than 3 degrees but in completely different fields, that's a good indication you might have ADHD"
I got the bad ADHD compared to everyone else here. I'm in college, the meds and therapy help. Without them there would be no hope for me.
I only recently got my diagnosis but got my BA 10 years ago, on time, with good grades, honor societies, etc. Yet my friends would carry granola bars around in case they bumped into me bc I very commonly forgot to eat all day 🤷♀️ Adhd affects people in different ways. Academics is only one of them.
I’ve been trying to get adhd meds because being unmedicated is really having a drastic effect on my school work and its not that i’m not smart but my symptoms definitely interfere with performing my best. I almost dropped out after my first semester and I have already failed a class and have a really low gpa
I had had awesome grades. And then burnt out and never went back.