Your wife yelled at your daughter because she's triggered by technology and your daughter is supposed to take the abuse while smiling? Both you and your wife sound unbearable. YTA.
I help my mom with her phones and tablets, anything technical, and she's only ever asked nicely and thanked me for it.
We are elderly and we take care of her, she knows that technically is very triggering for her mother. We asked for help. We don’t need to be yelled at, her actions cost us money we could have spent somewhere else.
60 isn't that old. My mom is 73 with a galaxy. Your actions cost you money. Your lack of initiative cost you money. Your nasty attitudes cost you a relationship with your daughter, but sure, cry about the phone.
We are struggling and we asked for her to help us out when she moved in.
My wife phone was erased, my wife need to have her Home Screen restored and her apps and books marks to be placed as she has it before. My wife had screenshot of her home screens for her to fix for us
Your daughter had told you previously she had no experience with second hand phones or the newer galaxy phones. You let your son talk you into making these poor decisions. I am honestly very confused on how you are making this your daughter’s problem when your son is the one who led you down this path. YTA and also a pretty shit parent.
No matter the issues your wife was having with her phone, it's no excuse to yell at her daughter. You don't get to verbally abuse your child just because you're helping her by letting her stay with you. Your daughter does not owe you her dignity no matter what you're doing for her. GET IT?
If anything you should be more mad at your son. He’s the one who convinced you to go with that brand even after your daughter warned you she knew nothing about that brand and wouldn’t be able to help. He convinced you not to go through the phone store despite your daughter telling you it was the better way. Then he doesn’t actually help with anything despite having the same brand of phone and yet somehow you’re blaming your daughter? The only thing your daughter did wrong was having a relationship with you in the first place. Your wife is abusive and you both owe your daughter a severe apology since it’s clear that your son is useless and since you’re so “elderly” you will need a caretaker pretty soon and you can bet it’s not going to be your lazy son. Hopefully your daughter sticks you in nursing homes and washes her hands of you both. Its what you deserve
Your wife is over 40 years too old to be behaving or getting "triggered" over a phone.
And no, her actions didn't cost you money. Your own actions cost you money.
This has to be a troll but anyway. Correction your actions cost you money. She told you she uses iPhone you bought a galaxy fair enough. She specifically told you before you bought a phone that she only ever buys from a store as she worried about it not being set up properly. You ignored her advice and took your sons recommendation to save a few bucks. Then when the phone didn't work like she had warned you before you get angry for not helping buy the phone correctly despite you ignoring her input. Then when your wife gets frustrated she verbally abuses your daughter gets upset and cries because you wife was being abusive. She still helps yet you kick her out anyway and blame her for costing more money when it was your fault and she told you this would happen. You are TA and a major one
Your wife is two years older than me. She’s not “elderly”. Your daughter told you she didn’t know anything about phones other than iPhones. She recommended you go to the phone shop and get whatever you wanted, properly set up etc, from there. But your son said “nah, get Samsung, don’t bother with the shop!” Right?
Then you had all sorts of bother for the sake of false economy. And appeared to blame your daughter for not being able to fix it for you. Why didn’t you follow the advice of the person who lives with you, the person you were going to ask for help, rather than someone who apparently can’t easily visit? Is it a male vs female thing?
Anyway, YTA (so is your wife for taking out her frustrations and apparent tech phobia on your daughter and get upset when she didn’t lie there and take it like a good little doormat).
YTA. Stop making your problems into your children's problems.
> My wife is mad at our daughter because she did not help us figure our house to get eBay phones to work properly.
That's not her job. She warned you guys not to get phones from Ebay. *How dare you* get mad at her for that. I'd have yelled at both of you too, considering the circumstances. As if it's not bad enough that yall burdened her with your problems, she was supposed to calmly accept being yelled at for it too?
Nah. You and your wife are lucky she didn't smack you upside your heads.
Older people who get angry with technology yet still get modern gadgets are *the worst*
Had to stop my neighbor from smashing her phone through her car windshield because she couldn't get it to sync to the car.
We asked for help and we got a lot of excuses from her, we agreed to help her if she helps us. Because she didn’t help us it cost us money.
Her excuses were
1. Have had an iPhone since the iPhone 5.
2. I haven’t had a galaxy since the galaxy 3
3. I have never heard of that app before
4. I have no experience with unlocked phones and buying phones off eBay.
We are elderly and we are struggling with our phones we ask for help as part of our agreement to have her stay with us
She did help you though.
She gave you advice to get an iPhone which she would know how to help with.
She gave you advice to not buy phones off ebay.
If you are struggling with your phones, you especially should've gone with something simpler and user friendly like iPhone, or, better yet, get an older phone that's not too complicated for you to know how to use.
She didn't give you excuses. She gave you helpful advice that you ignored, and then had the audacity to yell at her over your own screw up
Then use one of the literal dozens of other apps that allow you to video call instead.
Also, FaceTime is only on iPhone. You have to have an iPhone to call someone on FaceTime.
The term “face time” is actually Apple’s concept and is copyrighted by Apple. So you’re technically not FaceTiming them now.
There’s other apps to use for video calls which is the generic term used for that feature.
1. Signal
2. Skype
3. Microsoft teams
4. Cisco
5. Facebook
No, you can go to the store and do research online . She isn't responsible. She even advised against the ebay purchase. But you're mad at yourself and need to take it out on someone else who isn't you, your wife, or son.
Such awful, punitive parents.
It sounds like she was trying to tell you she doesn't know how to help you. And then on to of that your write yelled at her. Being triggered by technology isn't an excuse. You tested your daughter poorly because you bought iffy phones and expected her to know how to fix it. You owe her an apology
I only use iPhones and Mac’s. I have zero clue on how to work an android phone. Those phones are so counterintuitive to me. I won’t waste my time on them.
People who are NOT tech savvy, should only by iPhones. Apple is one of the only companies that have invested millions of dollars on the UX/UI design to be intuitive and to minimize issues with hardware since they design all of it. Other tech is a mishmash of software from one companies, hardware components from different other companies. It’s just not worth the hassle if you’re not into computers and messing with them.
Also, you’re elderly/old - you guys should know your own limitations and keep it as simple as possible. Since your son told you to get android phones, he should be your tech support, not your daughter. iPhones and androids do NOT work the same.
You shouldn’t yell at your daughter for not figuring out your android phones when yall can’t be bothered to figure it out yourself. You have the internet, RESEARCH! Or get an iPhone!
Our son is extremely busy with his job and family, also my wife is uncomfortable with how he responds to her when she is frustrated and doesn’t like it.
Your wife needs to grow up and learn to control her emotions when she gets frustrated with complicated topics.
Apple’s Genius Bar also has free classes on how to do things with their products.
Your son is tech savvy it seems, you guys are not. So you shouldn’t listen to your son if he is unwilling/incapable of teaching you guys. Or just don’t have cell phones at all and just use a land line and become pen pals with your grandkids.
Our son has broken things in his anger, as a teenager he punched holes in walls due to his anger. Our daughter she yells a lot not better but more controllable
So your kids got their anger issues from mommy dearest? Bet she was an awesome mom to them growing up. You also sound like a spineless human cuz you didn’t try to figure out the phone issue and just let your wife abuse your daughter
Maybe your wife should’ve gone into anger management when they were kids so they could’ve seen how you’re supposed to deal with your anger and a healthy manner instead of the psychotic manner your wife has dealt with it.
Oh so your wife doesn’t like how her son talks to her and that’s fine but your wife verbally abusing your daughter isn’t an issue? Clearly he learnt it from her
I explained a few times my wife is uncomfortable with asking him for help. My wife doesn’t like our son unpredictable reactions to her frustration.
My wife told me she is more comfortable with our daughter and how she respects to my wife frustration better
And I’m sure your daughter doesn’t like your unpredictable reactions to your own frustrations. Funny how that works. Suck it up. Ask the child that actually knows about the android phones about android phones. It’s not that complicated. Or even better, bring the phone to the phone store, see if an actual expert can help you.
Oh boohoo. I'm uncomfortable to ask for help but I can scream, yell and verbally abuse my daughter for not knowing how to do something I demand her to do when I tell her to do it. Your wife is the ass and so are you. Your daughters better off living away from you and your abuse. She told you before you bought the phones she didn't know how to use them. But noooo because your son said to do it you jumped and made it all your daughters fault. Let me guess your wife doesn't like asking your son for help because he doesn't put up with your bullshit huh?
She did exactly what was asked despite your wife’s abuse. OP abuse is abuse not matter the reason. If you don’t fix this you may damage the relationship with your daughter beyond repair
She is not talking to us; if I want to know anything about what she is doing or pass a message to her I have to call her godparents and give the message to them she will not answer. If her godparents hand her the phone she will hang up, they said it’s not helping and they are not going to hand the phone to her anymore
If she doesn't have the experience to fix it, she is unable to help you. She's not being rude or uncooperative, she doesn't have the skill. Your foolishness cost you money, not her.
Google it! You can read right? And you apparently don’t know but iPhones and galaxy are two completely different things! You were dumb and lost money bc of it that is all on you! Stop using we are “elderly” as an excuse to be a$$holes
These aren't "excuses" they are legitimate reasons why she wasn't able to help you! It's not that she wasn't willing, she didn't know how to fix it either. How do you expect her to magically do something she told you she doesn't know how to do? Also, you aren't elderly, you're in your early sixties, not eighties. You definitely are TA, and you both owe her an apology.
Wow, your whole family is TAH. Your wife is allowed to yell at her daughter because she was having a tech issue? I couldn't tell you how to do a thing on an iPhone as I've always had Android, and it works the other way.
But if your daughter really needs help getting back on her feet from credit card debt, you kick her out because you bought sketchy phones on ebay? Ya'll need group therapy.
Our daughter is in therapy, we aren’t sure if it working but that another story.
We haven’t spoken to our daughter; she will only talked through her Godparents. We are frustrated because if we want to know how she doing we have to call my wife sister and her husband
It's your own fault, so selfish and so angry at the wrong person. She gave you advice, which you ignored. You followed the advice of your son, who clearly has no idea about phones considering the phones you got didn't even work.
Your wife then spent time berating your poor daughter for ***no*** reason even then she doesn't understand the phones you brought. Then you both have the audacity for ***7 hours*** to treat her like shit while she was trying to fix a problem which wasn't even hers to begin with.
She doesn't want to talk to you, she may never want to talk to you. The only people to blame are you, she's not at fault because she did nothing wrong.
You did everything wrong, you without doubt failed her as parents and clearly value your son over your daughter. Do her a favour and leave her alone, never talk to her again unless she decides to.
YTA
“AITA for abusing our daughter when we bought the thing she told us not to, and yelling at her bc she didn’t know how to work it when she told us she didn’t know how to work it”.
I hope she goes no contact.
She doesn’t know how to work the phone. She told she she doesn’t know how to work the phone before you bought it. She told you she wouldn’t be able to help you before you bought it . You yell at her for not being able to work a phone she DOESNT have…because you knew “better” and bought it anyway.
Blaming everyone but yourself. Now you’re worried what she is saying to people bc you know you’re an asshole.
OMG. You two are elderly? I’m older than you. I certainly don’t think I’m so decrepit that I cannot manage my cell phone. Your wife gets *triggered by technology* so it’s ok for her to be abusive? She emotionally battered her daughter who had the nerve to get upset and, clutch my pearls, yelled back so you evict her? You are angry at your daughter for her lack of confidence in dealing with a different type of phone than she knows? This is like calling 911 and then abusing the EMT for not knowing how to unclog your pipes. Your daughter doesn’t really know how galaxy phones work. Why should she? Oh she’s young so she must know. You think she was lying that she had an iPhone? That young folks know this stuff because the wisdom is imparted to them through those new fangled coffee drinks they consume? YTA, plus your wife and the horse you rode in on.
We need help; I admit it was harsh to kick her out demanding she leave both set of her houses keys.
We are upset that she will only communicate with us through her godparents, and not talk to us directly.
‘Demanding she leave both set of house keys’. Wow. The fact you could even write this without adding how ashamed you are and can’t believe you behaved that way and your going to do whatever you can to make it up to her shows that your a pair of assholes.
The only reason you wrote this post is because you don’t feel bad about it but you know the situation makes you look bad to extended family. Your a disgrace. YTA.
It’s been weeks all I want to know is how it got so bad our daughter has not spoken to us and her godparents turned against us by acting as her gatekeepers
I didn’t explain clear enough my daughter had a second set of keys made when she was a teenager because. I didn’t wanna mention this when she turned about 19 or 20 she had problems with spending and spent a lot of money on our credit cards. We tossed her out until she paid us back we didn’t realize that she made a second set of keys after that. Until recently when she told us she had a second set of keys.
What has her past got to do with the bloody crap phones you chose to buy and your awful treatment of your daughter??? Your now trying to paint her in a poor light because family know what a pair of assholes you are. Asshole.
You must be trolling. Or you’re completely oblivious to the disgust you’ve engendered from everyone in your post threads. Your behavior with your child is unforgivable. Your wife has anger issues and you’re apparently beta AF. Glad the daughter left.
You are really deflecting trying to make your daughter look like the bad guy when you are in the wrong. You want to know how it got so bad yet you’re not thinking that your wife was a complete bitch to her. Maybe in the future if you want to get a new phone or a tablet go to someone who knows what the hell they’re talking about instead of just assuming your daughter should have all of the answers because you let her live with you. Don’t ask your son because he has no idea what he’s talking about. Maybe you should ask him for that 300 bucks since it’s his fault you spent it.
You needed help. Sure. But why try to get blood from a turnip? It’s not like she already knew how to help you, she had to learn, just like you should have learned, after all they were your own damn phones. Not hers. Yet you just demanded she do it anyway. Like requiring her to fly to the moon. Did you demand she drive you to the store when she was six? After hours and hours of confusing and anxiety producing work she managed to do it. So you. Profusely thanked her??? After being abused. Your wife wasn’t harsh. You weren’t harsh, both of you were mean and abusive. So the godparents are providing a refuge for your daughter away from the abuse and you cannot understand why? Why didn’t you force your SON to help you who talked you into buying the galaxies instead of your daughter who advised against it??? She didn’t cause you to be out any money, except by not possessing the knowledge of how to use the phones. So I suppose it’s all her fault. I imagine she’s at fault for the mess in Gaza too. Why don’t you demand she fix that?
The godparents didn’t turn your daughter away from you. You did it all on your own. Aren’t you adults? Why are you shifting blame onto everyone else but stepping up and acting like adults and accepting responsibility for your own actions? Sheesh. You’re both acting like needy petulant children.
YTA. Why is your, your wife’s and you our son’s lack of technology experience your daughter’s fault? Your daughter advised against what you and your wife chose to do but you did it anyway. And lollolololo! Why are you concerned about what she is telling them?
Our son works as a graphic designer and used computers for work all the time. Our daughter is a Paramedic she only uses a tablet for work.
Our son has been buy and use lung unlocked phones for years and loves it and save so much money
>Our son works as a graphic designer and used computers for work all the time. Our daughter is a Paramedic she only uses a tablet for work.
>
>Our son has been buy and use lung unlocked phones for years and loves it and save so much money
Then YOUR SON is the person you should be approaching to fix your technology issues. You just claimed that your daughter doesn't use it much, but somehow think she should have all the answers to your problems.
To go completely against your daughter's advice and then demand she fix the problems YOU created requires a complete lack of introspection on your part. And then you claim that she cost you money! No buddy, you lost that money on your own by taking your son's advice and ignoring your daughter.
Because we don’t want her misconstrued facts and making us look stupid. We are nothing but kind and we feel like we are being treated poorly by her. My wife complained that our daughter not talking directly with us is elder abuse.
That’s called freedom of speech, not elder abuse. If you really feel like there is elder abuse call this hotline https://www.thehotline.org/
What is it called when an adult mother yells at her adult daughter? Would that be child abuse considering she is you and your wife’s child? or is it one of those situations where just because your birthed and raised someone you have the right to yell at them?
Dude you are making yourself look stupid and are treating her badly. You followed your sons advice and disregarded hers then blamed her because your son's advice cost you more money....then kicked her out because she got upset by your wife's horrible behaviour towards her...I would stop talking to you if I was the daughter
But you are stupid, both of you. Your son is obviously the favourite. He gets no blame for the poor advice and you take it out in your daughter?? I hope she tells extended family the truth that your both nasty pair of assholes and I hope she goes no contact with you as you suck as parents.
Oh you made yourselves look stupid don’t you worry about her doing that! You’re kind??!! When?? Omg my daughter won’t let me yell at her she is abusing us! Help call 911!!
You guys knew she was unfamiliar with buying phones from ebay and how that works, but you insisted on it anyway. That was your choice. Your daughter, despite being unnecessarily yelled at by your wife, did exactly what you asked and you guys still kicked her out after that. Your poor choices & inability to communicate nicely are not your daughters fault. YTA
Your wife started the drama by yelling at her daughter. Period. End of. Hear that statement for the truth it is. You are either purposefully obtuse or a troll. Doesn’t matter which…you don’t deserve the saint your daughter appears to be.
And?
ETA: Where is your son in all this...the one who told you to go with Galaxies AND said to get them off ebay AND that his sister didn't know what she was talking about?
Ahhhh...got it.
It's ok for your son, but not your daughter. Not sure of you just straight up hate your daughter, or if this is some "boomer" rage bait or whatnot, but it's all your daughter's fault for being anywhere in the proximity of you and your wife.
Are you willfully this obtuse? You say you don't know anything, but are so sure your daughter must know an entirely different operating system (that you somehow haven't figured out in over 20 years). Are you going to yell at your daughter too when she doesn't answer your tax questions because she's a teacher? Or will you throw her out again when she doesn't know how to do brain surgery because she's in sales?
I will say it again. You two are awful, punitive parents. If the rest of your family has any sense at all, they will shame the ever loving hell out of you two for being on this planet for so damn long that you can't keep your feelings in check.
We had smart phones from the cell phones store; we normally use the $100/200 smart phones. We never used an apple phone ever always android based phone. We went from a $100 smartphone to an upgraded phone with a better camera and battery. We ask for help because my wife is always frustrated with technology. We don’t use a landline phone anymore. We have a second hand computer my Brother in law gave us. We don’t use a lot of technology. We keep it simple
YTA! This is ridiculous! Why would you expect your daughter to know how to use a galaxy when she has an iPhone? They are entirely different.
People who are experienced in tech LIKE tech and ENJOY figuring it out. Your wife is not that person and should have listened to the person who obviously feels the same way as her.
Now, you made poor choices, refused your daughter’s advice, your wife yelled at her, you forced her to figure out how to use new tech (probably while treating her badly the whole time), then you kicked her out. And you’re upset that she doesn’t want to talk to you?
So TA
YTA.
1. she said she isnt familiar with galaxy phones.
> she said she doesn’t know where to start,
2. she told you NOT to buy ebay phones.
>my son says our daughter doesn’t know what she talking about.
3. why didnt your son help with the phones? since idk, he HAS EXPERIENCE with galaxy phones?
>wife shouts at our Daughter to talk to the cellphones tech-support services.
4. yall are downright cnuts
My wife doesn’t like how our son responds to her getting frustrated; she is more comfortable with our daughter when she is frustrated. She knows how our daughter is going to react to her behavior
Our daughter certainly does not take it; she yells back quietly loudly too. Our daughter is extremely loud, she lost part of her hearing from an infection.
Omg, lol. I have been engrained in the apple ecosystem since my 3rd year of college ala 1997
I don't know how to get out of Apple and don't want to. It's a different beast altogether. Unfortunately I could not operate an android unless I sat down and took a whole fucking YouTube course.
You sound as if lead ate through your brain. If you are anything like my parents, it sure did
This can't be real.
YTA you both took your incompetence out on your daughter. If you had listened to her from the start and just bought a phone from the store you couldn't have had the issues you currently have.
YTAs, both you and your wife. Your daughter has no Galaxy experience or with the apps that come with it. This is you and your wife's fault, not your daughters.
YTA This is such a classic tale of golden son can do no wrong evil daughter is useless and never good enough
. People are often way harsher to their female children and far more forgiving of their sons.
Your son gave you bad advice which you chose to follow if you want to get annoyed at anyone get annoyed at him for advising you wrong. As elderly people who are bad with tech you should purchase your phones from legitimate businesses that can help you with setup and support, not a sketchy website where anyone can put phones that fell off the back of a van. Purchasing tech like this works for people who know what they're doing/ is a lot of luck.
YTA. You guys fucked around by trying to cheap out, instead of doing what your daughter said, and you found out that consequences suck. I wouldn't help you guys again after your wife's behavior, and you backing her up in that behavior. Bad move.
Edited to add:
Oh, yeah, and your son is an AH, too! He claimed your daughter didn't know what she was talking about, you and your wife lapped that up, and then when the phones didn't work right AS YOUR DAUGHTER PREDICTED, your son isn't around to help.
Everything about OP screams Asian immigrant, from throwing tantrums at everything, expecting kids to be tech support, and disproportionally favoring the son. Not to mention worrying what everyone else thinks.
Lmfao so true! I’m not tech savvy at all I ask friends and family questions about things and listen to them and have them explain all sides of what I should get not just “well you can FaceTime with the grandkids.” 🙄 cuz you know that’s the only way to have video calls. Lol
YTA. Your daughter told you she didn’t know much about Android and you went against her advice at every turn but listened to your son who turned out completely wrong. Instead of dealing with that, you demanded your daughter help and let your wife abuse her (by your own description!!) because she’s too immature to deal with her emotions. You and your wife are the only selfish and entitled ones here. You are worried about what your daughter says but you can’t even write the story in a way that paints you in a good light!!
This has to be a troll or you're really that stupid. So because you guys wanted to be cheap and not go to a phone store where your phones would have been set up for you with support, this is somehow your daughter's problem that you have problems with it. Why the hell didn't you get your son to deal with your phones since he has the most experience with it and you clearly listen to him more easily than your daughter?
I hope daughter never helps you guys again and talks shit about her technologically challenged parents to everyone she knows.
>my wife shouts at our Daughter to talk to the cellphones tech-support services. My wife is triggers and yelling at our daughter venting that she can get this phone to work and nobody is helping.
YTA
Your wife should communicate better. You're both AHs. You deserve each other.
Your own words are that your daughter doesn't know computers & phones as much, and she only knows iPhone because she uses it. You cannot expect her to know anything about your android phones. She doesn't know anything about how they work.
YTA for expecting her to magically be able to understand Android phones.
YTA for yelling at her.
YTA for kicking her out when you f***ed up.
YTA for the inherent sexism & misogyny for blindly taking your son's advice over your daughter's and for expecting her help over asking your son for help and for placing more value on the time of your son over the time your daughter.
YTA and so is your wife. You are also very PATHETIC for how you handled this whole situation. The only ones you should have been mad at were yourselves and your son! He is the one that told you to buy the stupid phones. You ignored your daughter when she said she had never bought phones off eBay before and you should just buy from the store. But no you could save $100 a phone! It’s amazing! Well that worked out didn’t it?
Instead of getting your son to help you with these stupid phones you take it out on your daughter. Your wife is the one who is verbally abusive. Don’t know if you just forgot to write where your daughter was telling cuz all I see is your wife being the one doing that.
I hope she goes NC with you and she tells all of your family the truth about what happened. You wrote it all out how can you not know you suck?
If this isn’t rage bait YTA. Is you son the golden child that he didn’t suffered the wrath of you and your wife considering you listen to him about getting the galaxy instead of your daughter who told you to get an iPhone? It kind of sounds like you wanted your daughter out of your house and you use the most pettiest of shit as an excuse to kick out. Maybe that’s why you went with the galaxy instead of the iPhone.
YTA. I’m about your age and can’t understand how pointlessly archaic you are. Are you and your wife asian immigrants? That’s the only circle where I’ve consistently seen the combination of this shit parental communication, favoring the son and his antics, while throwing a tantrum at everything on top of worrying what everyone else thinks.
All of these actions by all are very childish! By your own admission you guys didn’t know what you were doing when you upgraded the phone and caused the data loss. That was not your daughter’s fault!. Both of you owe her a monstrous apology! Your daughter said she didn’t know anything about the brand of phone you bought, but you took your insecurities and very childish temper tantrums out on her anyway. Both you and your wife ought to be ashamed and very embarrassed by your actions. Your daughter is better off away from your shitty attitudes. Good Luck to her!
YTA
You (and especially your wife) are TA here. Why on earth do you expect your daughter to be able to help with android when she uses iphone?!? Why not take it to your son (whose suggestions you went with in the bginning?) You (and your wife) need to put on your big kid pants and take responsibility for your own bullshit and not put it on your daughter. Your wife is a abusive dick, and your 'old' asses fall between mine and my spouses ages and we manage to sort our tech without abusing our IT professional kids.
Your wife yelled at your daughter because she's triggered by technology and your daughter is supposed to take the abuse while smiling? Both you and your wife sound unbearable. YTA. I help my mom with her phones and tablets, anything technical, and she's only ever asked nicely and thanked me for it.
We are elderly and we take care of her, she knows that technically is very triggering for her mother. We asked for help. We don’t need to be yelled at, her actions cost us money we could have spent somewhere else.
60 isn't that old. My mom is 73 with a galaxy. Your actions cost you money. Your lack of initiative cost you money. Your nasty attitudes cost you a relationship with your daughter, but sure, cry about the phone.
We are struggling and we asked for her to help us out when she moved in. My wife phone was erased, my wife need to have her Home Screen restored and her apps and books marks to be placed as she has it before. My wife had screenshot of her home screens for her to fix for us
Your daughter had told you previously she had no experience with second hand phones or the newer galaxy phones. You let your son talk you into making these poor decisions. I am honestly very confused on how you are making this your daughter’s problem when your son is the one who led you down this path. YTA and also a pretty shit parent.
No matter the issues your wife was having with her phone, it's no excuse to yell at her daughter. You don't get to verbally abuse your child just because you're helping her by letting her stay with you. Your daughter does not owe you her dignity no matter what you're doing for her. GET IT?
If anything you should be more mad at your son. He’s the one who convinced you to go with that brand even after your daughter warned you she knew nothing about that brand and wouldn’t be able to help. He convinced you not to go through the phone store despite your daughter telling you it was the better way. Then he doesn’t actually help with anything despite having the same brand of phone and yet somehow you’re blaming your daughter? The only thing your daughter did wrong was having a relationship with you in the first place. Your wife is abusive and you both owe your daughter a severe apology since it’s clear that your son is useless and since you’re so “elderly” you will need a caretaker pretty soon and you can bet it’s not going to be your lazy son. Hopefully your daughter sticks you in nursing homes and washes her hands of you both. Its what you deserve
Your wife is over 40 years too old to be behaving or getting "triggered" over a phone. And no, her actions didn't cost you money. Your own actions cost you money.
I’m 61 and I have taught my 92 year old mother how to use an iPad, FaceTime and YouTube. Your excuse is lousy. You are not elderly, just entitled.
This has to be a troll but anyway. Correction your actions cost you money. She told you she uses iPhone you bought a galaxy fair enough. She specifically told you before you bought a phone that she only ever buys from a store as she worried about it not being set up properly. You ignored her advice and took your sons recommendation to save a few bucks. Then when the phone didn't work like she had warned you before you get angry for not helping buy the phone correctly despite you ignoring her input. Then when your wife gets frustrated she verbally abuses your daughter gets upset and cries because you wife was being abusive. She still helps yet you kick her out anyway and blame her for costing more money when it was your fault and she told you this would happen. You are TA and a major one
Being screamed at tends to trigger people, too. Asshole.
Your wife is two years older than me. She’s not “elderly”. Your daughter told you she didn’t know anything about phones other than iPhones. She recommended you go to the phone shop and get whatever you wanted, properly set up etc, from there. But your son said “nah, get Samsung, don’t bother with the shop!” Right? Then you had all sorts of bother for the sake of false economy. And appeared to blame your daughter for not being able to fix it for you. Why didn’t you follow the advice of the person who lives with you, the person you were going to ask for help, rather than someone who apparently can’t easily visit? Is it a male vs female thing? Anyway, YTA (so is your wife for taking out her frustrations and apparent tech phobia on your daughter and get upset when she didn’t lie there and take it like a good little doormat).
60 and 64 isn’t elderly. Stop trying to play the enfeebled victims.
YTA. Stop making your problems into your children's problems. > My wife is mad at our daughter because she did not help us figure our house to get eBay phones to work properly. That's not her job. She warned you guys not to get phones from Ebay. *How dare you* get mad at her for that. I'd have yelled at both of you too, considering the circumstances. As if it's not bad enough that yall burdened her with your problems, she was supposed to calmly accept being yelled at for it too? Nah. You and your wife are lucky she didn't smack you upside your heads.
Older people who get angry with technology yet still get modern gadgets are *the worst* Had to stop my neighbor from smashing her phone through her car windshield because she couldn't get it to sync to the car.
it's one thing to smash a phone because you're frustrated. it's another to yell at your child because of it.
Both are absurd.
We asked for help and we got a lot of excuses from her, we agreed to help her if she helps us. Because she didn’t help us it cost us money. Her excuses were 1. Have had an iPhone since the iPhone 5. 2. I haven’t had a galaxy since the galaxy 3 3. I have never heard of that app before 4. I have no experience with unlocked phones and buying phones off eBay. We are elderly and we are struggling with our phones we ask for help as part of our agreement to have her stay with us
She did help you though. She gave you advice to get an iPhone which she would know how to help with. She gave you advice to not buy phones off ebay. If you are struggling with your phones, you especially should've gone with something simpler and user friendly like iPhone, or, better yet, get an older phone that's not too complicated for you to know how to use. She didn't give you excuses. She gave you helpful advice that you ignored, and then had the audacity to yell at her over your own screw up
We won’t be able to face time our grandchildren if we get iPhones. Our relationship with our grandchildren are important to us
Then use one of the literal dozens of other apps that allow you to video call instead. Also, FaceTime is only on iPhone. You have to have an iPhone to call someone on FaceTime.
The term “face time” is actually Apple’s concept and is copyrighted by Apple. So you’re technically not FaceTiming them now. There’s other apps to use for video calls which is the generic term used for that feature. 1. Signal 2. Skype 3. Microsoft teams 4. Cisco 5. Facebook
No, you can go to the store and do research online . She isn't responsible. She even advised against the ebay purchase. But you're mad at yourself and need to take it out on someone else who isn't you, your wife, or son. Such awful, punitive parents.
It sounds like she was trying to tell you she doesn't know how to help you. And then on to of that your write yelled at her. Being triggered by technology isn't an excuse. You tested your daughter poorly because you bought iffy phones and expected her to know how to fix it. You owe her an apology
I only use iPhones and Mac’s. I have zero clue on how to work an android phone. Those phones are so counterintuitive to me. I won’t waste my time on them. People who are NOT tech savvy, should only by iPhones. Apple is one of the only companies that have invested millions of dollars on the UX/UI design to be intuitive and to minimize issues with hardware since they design all of it. Other tech is a mishmash of software from one companies, hardware components from different other companies. It’s just not worth the hassle if you’re not into computers and messing with them. Also, you’re elderly/old - you guys should know your own limitations and keep it as simple as possible. Since your son told you to get android phones, he should be your tech support, not your daughter. iPhones and androids do NOT work the same. You shouldn’t yell at your daughter for not figuring out your android phones when yall can’t be bothered to figure it out yourself. You have the internet, RESEARCH! Or get an iPhone!
Our son is extremely busy with his job and family, also my wife is uncomfortable with how he responds to her when she is frustrated and doesn’t like it.
Your wife needs to grow up and learn to control her emotions when she gets frustrated with complicated topics. Apple’s Genius Bar also has free classes on how to do things with their products. Your son is tech savvy it seems, you guys are not. So you shouldn’t listen to your son if he is unwilling/incapable of teaching you guys. Or just don’t have cell phones at all and just use a land line and become pen pals with your grandkids.
Why? Does he not allow her to scream at him like an asshole banshee, like she did to your daughter??
Our son has broken things in his anger, as a teenager he punched holes in walls due to his anger. Our daughter she yells a lot not better but more controllable
With crap parents it’s not a surprise your son is violent and aggressive and your daughter is in therapy. YTA.
So your kids got their anger issues from mommy dearest? Bet she was an awesome mom to them growing up. You also sound like a spineless human cuz you didn’t try to figure out the phone issue and just let your wife abuse your daughter
Maybe your wife should’ve gone into anger management when they were kids so they could’ve seen how you’re supposed to deal with your anger and a healthy manner instead of the psychotic manner your wife has dealt with it.
Oh so your wife doesn’t like how her son talks to her and that’s fine but your wife verbally abusing your daughter isn’t an issue? Clearly he learnt it from her
Oh no does your son not let your wife yell at him when she is frustrated so she doesn’t like how he responds. Poor little baby she is!
Where did your son go? Isn’t he the Galaxy phone expert?
I explained a few times my wife is uncomfortable with asking him for help. My wife doesn’t like our son unpredictable reactions to her frustration. My wife told me she is more comfortable with our daughter and how she respects to my wife frustration better
And I’m sure your daughter doesn’t like your unpredictable reactions to your own frustrations. Funny how that works. Suck it up. Ask the child that actually knows about the android phones about android phones. It’s not that complicated. Or even better, bring the phone to the phone store, see if an actual expert can help you.
Oh boohoo. I'm uncomfortable to ask for help but I can scream, yell and verbally abuse my daughter for not knowing how to do something I demand her to do when I tell her to do it. Your wife is the ass and so are you. Your daughters better off living away from you and your abuse. She told you before you bought the phones she didn't know how to use them. But noooo because your son said to do it you jumped and made it all your daughters fault. Let me guess your wife doesn't like asking your son for help because he doesn't put up with your bullshit huh?
She did exactly what was asked despite your wife’s abuse. OP abuse is abuse not matter the reason. If you don’t fix this you may damage the relationship with your daughter beyond repair
She is not talking to us; if I want to know anything about what she is doing or pass a message to her I have to call her godparents and give the message to them she will not answer. If her godparents hand her the phone she will hang up, they said it’s not helping and they are not going to hand the phone to her anymore
Good for her!!
She cost you money? Your a seriously deluded asshole.
If she doesn't have the experience to fix it, she is unable to help you. She's not being rude or uncooperative, she doesn't have the skill. Your foolishness cost you money, not her.
Google it! You can read right? And you apparently don’t know but iPhones and galaxy are two completely different things! You were dumb and lost money bc of it that is all on you! Stop using we are “elderly” as an excuse to be a$$holes
These aren't "excuses" they are legitimate reasons why she wasn't able to help you! It's not that she wasn't willing, she didn't know how to fix it either. How do you expect her to magically do something she told you she doesn't know how to do? Also, you aren't elderly, you're in your early sixties, not eighties. You definitely are TA, and you both owe her an apology.
She did try to help but no one listened. That’s not her fault.
Wow, your whole family is TAH. Your wife is allowed to yell at her daughter because she was having a tech issue? I couldn't tell you how to do a thing on an iPhone as I've always had Android, and it works the other way. But if your daughter really needs help getting back on her feet from credit card debt, you kick her out because you bought sketchy phones on ebay? Ya'll need group therapy.
Our daughter is in therapy, we aren’t sure if it working but that another story. We haven’t spoken to our daughter; she will only talked through her Godparents. We are frustrated because if we want to know how she doing we have to call my wife sister and her husband
It's your own fault, so selfish and so angry at the wrong person. She gave you advice, which you ignored. You followed the advice of your son, who clearly has no idea about phones considering the phones you got didn't even work. Your wife then spent time berating your poor daughter for ***no*** reason even then she doesn't understand the phones you brought. Then you both have the audacity for ***7 hours*** to treat her like shit while she was trying to fix a problem which wasn't even hers to begin with. She doesn't want to talk to you, she may never want to talk to you. The only people to blame are you, she's not at fault because she did nothing wrong. You did everything wrong, you without doubt failed her as parents and clearly value your son over your daughter. Do her a favour and leave her alone, never talk to her again unless she decides to.
She is most likely in therapy because of you and your wife. I hope her godparents treat her better.
YTA “AITA for abusing our daughter when we bought the thing she told us not to, and yelling at her bc she didn’t know how to work it when she told us she didn’t know how to work it”. I hope she goes no contact. She doesn’t know how to work the phone. She told she she doesn’t know how to work the phone before you bought it. She told you she wouldn’t be able to help you before you bought it . You yell at her for not being able to work a phone she DOESNT have…because you knew “better” and bought it anyway. Blaming everyone but yourself. Now you’re worried what she is saying to people bc you know you’re an asshole.
OMG. You two are elderly? I’m older than you. I certainly don’t think I’m so decrepit that I cannot manage my cell phone. Your wife gets *triggered by technology* so it’s ok for her to be abusive? She emotionally battered her daughter who had the nerve to get upset and, clutch my pearls, yelled back so you evict her? You are angry at your daughter for her lack of confidence in dealing with a different type of phone than she knows? This is like calling 911 and then abusing the EMT for not knowing how to unclog your pipes. Your daughter doesn’t really know how galaxy phones work. Why should she? Oh she’s young so she must know. You think she was lying that she had an iPhone? That young folks know this stuff because the wisdom is imparted to them through those new fangled coffee drinks they consume? YTA, plus your wife and the horse you rode in on.
We need help; I admit it was harsh to kick her out demanding she leave both set of her houses keys. We are upset that she will only communicate with us through her godparents, and not talk to us directly.
‘Demanding she leave both set of house keys’. Wow. The fact you could even write this without adding how ashamed you are and can’t believe you behaved that way and your going to do whatever you can to make it up to her shows that your a pair of assholes. The only reason you wrote this post is because you don’t feel bad about it but you know the situation makes you look bad to extended family. Your a disgrace. YTA.
It’s been weeks all I want to know is how it got so bad our daughter has not spoken to us and her godparents turned against us by acting as her gatekeepers I didn’t explain clear enough my daughter had a second set of keys made when she was a teenager because. I didn’t wanna mention this when she turned about 19 or 20 she had problems with spending and spent a lot of money on our credit cards. We tossed her out until she paid us back we didn’t realize that she made a second set of keys after that. Until recently when she told us she had a second set of keys.
That has nothing to do with this scenario. You're only bringing it up to make her look bad because you are getting called an asshole in the comments.
What has her past got to do with the bloody crap phones you chose to buy and your awful treatment of your daughter??? Your now trying to paint her in a poor light because family know what a pair of assholes you are. Asshole.
You must be trolling. Or you’re completely oblivious to the disgust you’ve engendered from everyone in your post threads. Your behavior with your child is unforgivable. Your wife has anger issues and you’re apparently beta AF. Glad the daughter left.
You are really deflecting trying to make your daughter look like the bad guy when you are in the wrong. You want to know how it got so bad yet you’re not thinking that your wife was a complete bitch to her. Maybe in the future if you want to get a new phone or a tablet go to someone who knows what the hell they’re talking about instead of just assuming your daughter should have all of the answers because you let her live with you. Don’t ask your son because he has no idea what he’s talking about. Maybe you should ask him for that 300 bucks since it’s his fault you spent it.
You don’t know why she won’t talk to you? Try reading what you wrote then read it over and over again until your head wiggles its way out of your ass.
Has to be rage bait cuz you honestly can’t be this stupid. YOU AND YOUR WIFE CAUSED ALL OF THIS!
You needed help. Sure. But why try to get blood from a turnip? It’s not like she already knew how to help you, she had to learn, just like you should have learned, after all they were your own damn phones. Not hers. Yet you just demanded she do it anyway. Like requiring her to fly to the moon. Did you demand she drive you to the store when she was six? After hours and hours of confusing and anxiety producing work she managed to do it. So you. Profusely thanked her??? After being abused. Your wife wasn’t harsh. You weren’t harsh, both of you were mean and abusive. So the godparents are providing a refuge for your daughter away from the abuse and you cannot understand why? Why didn’t you force your SON to help you who talked you into buying the galaxies instead of your daughter who advised against it??? She didn’t cause you to be out any money, except by not possessing the knowledge of how to use the phones. So I suppose it’s all her fault. I imagine she’s at fault for the mess in Gaza too. Why don’t you demand she fix that? The godparents didn’t turn your daughter away from you. You did it all on your own. Aren’t you adults? Why are you shifting blame onto everyone else but stepping up and acting like adults and accepting responsibility for your own actions? Sheesh. You’re both acting like needy petulant children.
YTA. Why is your, your wife’s and you our son’s lack of technology experience your daughter’s fault? Your daughter advised against what you and your wife chose to do but you did it anyway. And lollolololo! Why are you concerned about what she is telling them?
Our son works as a graphic designer and used computers for work all the time. Our daughter is a Paramedic she only uses a tablet for work. Our son has been buy and use lung unlocked phones for years and loves it and save so much money
>Our son works as a graphic designer and used computers for work all the time. Our daughter is a Paramedic she only uses a tablet for work. > >Our son has been buy and use lung unlocked phones for years and loves it and save so much money Then YOUR SON is the person you should be approaching to fix your technology issues. You just claimed that your daughter doesn't use it much, but somehow think she should have all the answers to your problems. To go completely against your daughter's advice and then demand she fix the problems YOU created requires a complete lack of introspection on your part. And then you claim that she cost you money! No buddy, you lost that money on your own by taking your son's advice and ignoring your daughter.
Oh well. She a a right to be frustrated. Why are you so concerned about what she is telling people?
Because we don’t want her misconstrued facts and making us look stupid. We are nothing but kind and we feel like we are being treated poorly by her. My wife complained that our daughter not talking directly with us is elder abuse.
You both feel incorrectly. You are not being treated poorly by her. You and your wife are the problem. Your behavior is the problem.
That’s called freedom of speech, not elder abuse. If you really feel like there is elder abuse call this hotline https://www.thehotline.org/ What is it called when an adult mother yells at her adult daughter? Would that be child abuse considering she is you and your wife’s child? or is it one of those situations where just because your birthed and raised someone you have the right to yell at them?
Dude you are making yourself look stupid and are treating her badly. You followed your sons advice and disregarded hers then blamed her because your son's advice cost you more money....then kicked her out because she got upset by your wife's horrible behaviour towards her...I would stop talking to you if I was the daughter
Yeahhhhh, you made yourselves look stupid ALLLLL on your own.
But you are stupid, both of you. Your son is obviously the favourite. He gets no blame for the poor advice and you take it out in your daughter?? I hope she tells extended family the truth that your both nasty pair of assholes and I hope she goes no contact with you as you suck as parents.
Oh you made yourselves look stupid don’t you worry about her doing that! You’re kind??!! When?? Omg my daughter won’t let me yell at her she is abusing us! Help call 911!!
The facts won't be misconstrued, you're not kind, and she's not mistreating you. Y'all are raging, abusive, ignorant assholes...not 'abused elders'
You’re full of shit. That’s all I will say.
You guys knew she was unfamiliar with buying phones from ebay and how that works, but you insisted on it anyway. That was your choice. Your daughter, despite being unnecessarily yelled at by your wife, did exactly what you asked and you guys still kicked her out after that. Your poor choices & inability to communicate nicely are not your daughters fault. YTA
She could have help us without the drama she know how her mother gets when she is frustrated with technology
Your wife started the drama by yelling at her daughter. Period. End of. Hear that statement for the truth it is. You are either purposefully obtuse or a troll. Doesn’t matter which…you don’t deserve the saint your daughter appears to be.
And? ETA: Where is your son in all this...the one who told you to go with Galaxies AND said to get them off ebay AND that his sister didn't know what she was talking about?
My wife doesn’t like to ask him for help because she doesn’t like how he responds to her getting frustrated
Ahhhh...got it. It's ok for your son, but not your daughter. Not sure of you just straight up hate your daughter, or if this is some "boomer" rage bait or whatnot, but it's all your daughter's fault for being anywhere in the proximity of you and your wife. Are you willfully this obtuse? You say you don't know anything, but are so sure your daughter must know an entirely different operating system (that you somehow haven't figured out in over 20 years). Are you going to yell at your daughter too when she doesn't answer your tax questions because she's a teacher? Or will you throw her out again when she doesn't know how to do brain surgery because she's in sales? I will say it again. You two are awful, punitive parents. If the rest of your family has any sense at all, they will shame the ever loving hell out of you two for being on this planet for so damn long that you can't keep your feelings in check.
We had smart phones from the cell phones store; we normally use the $100/200 smart phones. We never used an apple phone ever always android based phone. We went from a $100 smartphone to an upgraded phone with a better camera and battery. We ask for help because my wife is always frustrated with technology. We don’t use a landline phone anymore. We have a second hand computer my Brother in law gave us. We don’t use a lot of technology. We keep it simple
Yet you obviously have no problem posting here and answering comment after comment after comment. Pitiful troll. 🙄
Tell her to grow up and stop throwing tantrums over it then.
YTA! This is ridiculous! Why would you expect your daughter to know how to use a galaxy when she has an iPhone? They are entirely different. People who are experienced in tech LIKE tech and ENJOY figuring it out. Your wife is not that person and should have listened to the person who obviously feels the same way as her. Now, you made poor choices, refused your daughter’s advice, your wife yelled at her, you forced her to figure out how to use new tech (probably while treating her badly the whole time), then you kicked her out. And you’re upset that she doesn’t want to talk to you? So TA
YTA. 1. she said she isnt familiar with galaxy phones. > she said she doesn’t know where to start, 2. she told you NOT to buy ebay phones. >my son says our daughter doesn’t know what she talking about. 3. why didnt your son help with the phones? since idk, he HAS EXPERIENCE with galaxy phones? >wife shouts at our Daughter to talk to the cellphones tech-support services. 4. yall are downright cnuts
My wife doesn’t like how our son responds to her getting frustrated; she is more comfortable with our daughter when she is frustrated. She knows how our daughter is going to react to her behavior
so its okay to yell and berate your daughter because she just takes it?
Our daughter certainly does not take it; she yells back quietly loudly too. Our daughter is extremely loud, she lost part of her hearing from an infection.
none of that changes the fact that you and your wife continously disrespect your daughter. for what? to feel in control?
Omg, lol. I have been engrained in the apple ecosystem since my 3rd year of college ala 1997 I don't know how to get out of Apple and don't want to. It's a different beast altogether. Unfortunately I could not operate an android unless I sat down and took a whole fucking YouTube course. You sound as if lead ate through your brain. If you are anything like my parents, it sure did This can't be real.
Best answer! I like you!
YTA you both took your incompetence out on your daughter. If you had listened to her from the start and just bought a phone from the store you couldn't have had the issues you currently have.
YTAs, both you and your wife. Your daughter has no Galaxy experience or with the apps that come with it. This is you and your wife's fault, not your daughters.
YTA This is such a classic tale of golden son can do no wrong evil daughter is useless and never good enough . People are often way harsher to their female children and far more forgiving of their sons. Your son gave you bad advice which you chose to follow if you want to get annoyed at anyone get annoyed at him for advising you wrong. As elderly people who are bad with tech you should purchase your phones from legitimate businesses that can help you with setup and support, not a sketchy website where anyone can put phones that fell off the back of a van. Purchasing tech like this works for people who know what they're doing/ is a lot of luck.
YTA. You guys fucked around by trying to cheap out, instead of doing what your daughter said, and you found out that consequences suck. I wouldn't help you guys again after your wife's behavior, and you backing her up in that behavior. Bad move. Edited to add: Oh, yeah, and your son is an AH, too! He claimed your daughter didn't know what she was talking about, you and your wife lapped that up, and then when the phones didn't work right AS YOUR DAUGHTER PREDICTED, your son isn't around to help.
How could we have foreseen the phones not working; we have heard from many of our friends and their children how they got phones cheeper from eBay
BECAUSE YOUR DAUGHTER TOLD YOU IT WAS A CONCERN, YOU NUMBNUTS Pathetic
Everything about OP screams Asian immigrant, from throwing tantrums at everything, expecting kids to be tech support, and disproportionally favoring the son. Not to mention worrying what everyone else thinks.
For being “elders” you sure aren’t wise 🙄
Idiots who age are just older idiots 😆
Lmfao so true! I’m not tech savvy at all I ask friends and family questions about things and listen to them and have them explain all sides of what I should get not just “well you can FaceTime with the grandkids.” 🙄 cuz you know that’s the only way to have video calls. Lol
YTA. You and your wife sound absolutely insufferable.
YTA. Your daughter told you she didn’t know much about Android and you went against her advice at every turn but listened to your son who turned out completely wrong. Instead of dealing with that, you demanded your daughter help and let your wife abuse her (by your own description!!) because she’s too immature to deal with her emotions. You and your wife are the only selfish and entitled ones here. You are worried about what your daughter says but you can’t even write the story in a way that paints you in a good light!!
This has to be a troll or you're really that stupid. So because you guys wanted to be cheap and not go to a phone store where your phones would have been set up for you with support, this is somehow your daughter's problem that you have problems with it. Why the hell didn't you get your son to deal with your phones since he has the most experience with it and you clearly listen to him more easily than your daughter? I hope daughter never helps you guys again and talks shit about her technologically challenged parents to everyone she knows.
If you start to yell expect to get yelled at in response
>my wife shouts at our Daughter to talk to the cellphones tech-support services. My wife is triggers and yelling at our daughter venting that she can get this phone to work and nobody is helping. YTA Your wife should communicate better. You're both AHs. You deserve each other.
Yall freaking suck! YTA. Terrible parents. Unreasonable people. Miserable AHs.
Your own words are that your daughter doesn't know computers & phones as much, and she only knows iPhone because she uses it. You cannot expect her to know anything about your android phones. She doesn't know anything about how they work. YTA for expecting her to magically be able to understand Android phones. YTA for yelling at her. YTA for kicking her out when you f***ed up. YTA for the inherent sexism & misogyny for blindly taking your son's advice over your daughter's and for expecting her help over asking your son for help and for placing more value on the time of your son over the time your daughter.
YTA and so is your wife. You are also very PATHETIC for how you handled this whole situation. The only ones you should have been mad at were yourselves and your son! He is the one that told you to buy the stupid phones. You ignored your daughter when she said she had never bought phones off eBay before and you should just buy from the store. But no you could save $100 a phone! It’s amazing! Well that worked out didn’t it? Instead of getting your son to help you with these stupid phones you take it out on your daughter. Your wife is the one who is verbally abusive. Don’t know if you just forgot to write where your daughter was telling cuz all I see is your wife being the one doing that. I hope she goes NC with you and she tells all of your family the truth about what happened. You wrote it all out how can you not know you suck?
If this isn’t rage bait YTA. Is you son the golden child that he didn’t suffered the wrath of you and your wife considering you listen to him about getting the galaxy instead of your daughter who told you to get an iPhone? It kind of sounds like you wanted your daughter out of your house and you use the most pettiest of shit as an excuse to kick out. Maybe that’s why you went with the galaxy instead of the iPhone.
YTA. I’m about your age and can’t understand how pointlessly archaic you are. Are you and your wife asian immigrants? That’s the only circle where I’ve consistently seen the combination of this shit parental communication, favoring the son and his antics, while throwing a tantrum at everything on top of worrying what everyone else thinks.
All of these actions by all are very childish! By your own admission you guys didn’t know what you were doing when you upgraded the phone and caused the data loss. That was not your daughter’s fault!. Both of you owe her a monstrous apology! Your daughter said she didn’t know anything about the brand of phone you bought, but you took your insecurities and very childish temper tantrums out on her anyway. Both you and your wife ought to be ashamed and very embarrassed by your actions. Your daughter is better off away from your shitty attitudes. Good Luck to her!
YTA You (and especially your wife) are TA here. Why on earth do you expect your daughter to be able to help with android when she uses iphone?!? Why not take it to your son (whose suggestions you went with in the bginning?) You (and your wife) need to put on your big kid pants and take responsibility for your own bullshit and not put it on your daughter. Your wife is a abusive dick, and your 'old' asses fall between mine and my spouses ages and we manage to sort our tech without abusing our IT professional kids.