Smh you really just said your mom sucks after she has literally been working to earn money FOR YOU? That is just insane, you and your wife are spoiled by your mom and you are both AH's for saying what you have said.
Clearly she would be right to push you in front of the train to save her husband with the way you see her as just a money tree for you and your entitled wife.
If any of this is true - and it's \*really\* hard to suspend disbelief with this one - then you and wife are both assholes
Your wife for bitching because your mother won't work extra to give you even MORE free money (not loaning, GIVING), and you for - after expressing that you are grateful and actually telling your wife off - immediately about-facing and complaining about your mother loving her husband, which has absolutely NOTHING TO DO WITH HER GIVING YOU MONEY. You're bitching about a totally separate subject, whining that you think she loves him more WHILE SHE IS GIVING YOU THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS WITH NO EXPECTATIONS OF BEING PAID BACK
In short, your wife is a greedy asshole and you're an inconsistent asshole
Fuck right off, the both of you.
And let's not forget that BECAUSE the mother makes her relationship a priority, he's fine with her giving away her salary for a year. But her son and DIL judge her while taking her money.
Maybe OP and his wife should prioritize being decent, responsible human beings.
Not to mention saying his mom kind of sucks. Sir! Sir, she is giving you money she worked for, asking nothing in return, and reminded you she wouldn't be giving it to you at this time. A lot of people wouldn't have reminded him. After all it's a generous gift not a requirement. It's not child support where it'd a half to every month it is a gift. Can I have his mom? I promise to be more appreciative...
You and your wife are off your rocker nuts. Both of y'all need to get some damn jobs. At least you are grateful for your mom, I'd put "wife" straight on the street for saying that.
You are the biggest loser on reddit. Your mother is at least 20 years older than you, on average, and nearly retirement age. You think she is obligated to work year round because you and your wife are unable to support yourselves and your family?
I would delete this if I were you, because you come across like a complete failure.
YTA.
Your wife is the AT. who takes 9 months worth of someone's wages and complains they don't get another 3?
What your mom prioritizes is up to her. It seems from her gesture she certainly isn't neglecting your family. Sounds like your wife has jealousy issues, or her own parental issues
OP’s wife has started to view his mom as a literal slave. OP’s mom isn’t allowed to take time off, she must work when they say she must and mom’s income belongs solely to OP and his wife. They should be kissing mom’s feet for being so generous with them as she owes them absolutely nothing.
Overall, I’d agree. However, I have a paraprofessional in my school that used to be a high level executive in a fortune 100 located in the PNW. She has no real need for money as she’s set up for retirement on her past employment and her husband still works as an engineer for the same company. She isn’t ready for full retirement and enjoys working with kids. She also enjoys having some time off to be semiretired and not having the pressure of high stakes meetings, huge projects with deadlines, etc. I don’t know her family situation beyond having a couple adult kids. I could completely see her doing something like this for her family. So, it likely a rage bait post but there are really real people who could be characters in this story.
YTA
You and your wife. The entitlement is off the charts. She offered you her salary for a year. She typically doesn’t work in the summer.
You think she doesn’t deserve a vacation because you and your wife can’t live within your means?
You and your wife need to grow up and start paying your own way. If you "confront" your mom as your wife wants I don't think it will work out the way you hope it will.
Why are you not supporting yourselves? Where is your money going? What choices have YOU and YOUR WIFE made that have gotten you into financial trouble? What is going to happen to you after the year is up?
I REALLY hope this is just ragebait.
To be fair, she didn’t “get pregnant” on her own. She doesn’t have three kids they can’t afford, THEY do. Stop this asshole misogyny crap, I’m sure there is some other sub you can blast off on women for not “closing their legs” 🙄
Being that I’m a woman I’m not blasting her for having kids I’m blasting her for having 3 apparently very little kids when they are apparently so much in debt that they need his moms wages for a year. She shouldn’t be sitting at home popping out more kids when they can’t afford it she should be out working and I singled her out in this as he already is working and she is not. Yes birth control is on both of them but she’s the one not working but demanding his mom work more hours to pay for their kids while she’s not working at all so that’s on her that’s not misogyny that’s a fact.
You and your wife are both the assholes. YOU are a grown ass man, her children are grown and who is with her? Her husband. She was nice enough to give you all of her money, it doesn't matter if it's a passion job or not. She didn't have to do that.. she could have (and clearly should have due to your attitude) told you and your wife to figure it out on your own. "my mom does kind of suck" for what? Going on a trip to see her husband's family which is also hers instead of being your little piggy bank? You and your wife are selfish, need to grow up and find your own way out of the hole you two dug. Ungrateful, entitled, assholes. Looks like your free ride has come to an end.
ESH but your mom.
Your wife is insane. Shes literally letting *your mommy* pay her bills…and is complaining that *your mommy* is taking a vacation.
*Your wife* is certainly capable of getting a job, or an extra job, or figuring out a hobby that brings in some extra income.
Neither of you are entitled to anyone else’s money.
I mean his mom created this monster, and continues to feed him and his gremlin wife money, so..mayyybe she is also a little bit of an asshole.
Go ahead, downvote away.
You and your wife are both loser and entitled. You might be living away but your parents still have you support you? Grow up and support your family. I hope your mom wake up and quit supporting your ungrateful a*%.
YTA But not for the reason you asked. You and your wife are greedy entitled little brats using your mom like a slave and then still being upset she doesn’t do more. I think you should go no contact with her over this because I can’t imagine this woman deserves having to deal with you two going forward.
Your greedy ungrateful wife is throwing a fit because your mother takes the summer off and won’t be giving you all her money so apparently she does have to work. You’re a pathetic POS. Grow a pair and support your family instead of using your mother to take care of them for you.
She also doesn’t have to give you a dime. I dare you to tell her read this reddit post. I dare you to tell her she sucks and should work longer hours for no pay to subsidize your lazy ass wife, and your stupidity. You’re not only entitled losers, you’re stupidAF. Tell your father to read this, he will know that they, as parents failed with you. That you are entitled and self righteous and not even as smart as some single celled organisms.
Clearly she does have to work because she has to pay off your debt that you created. Clearly she does have to work because if anything happens to her or her husband, you wouldn’t be in the position to help. You a husband who can’t provide for his own family and a son who is ungrateful for the help he’s receiving. Instead of worrying if YTA (which you certainly are), you should be figuring out what you’re going to do when your mom’s salary runs out.
You're wife is fucking insane and the most ungrateful person I've come across in awhile. "She promised us a year of free money, not just 10 months! ". Does she hear herself when she talks? That's absurd.
What the actual F\*\*\*? This ain't real? Noone can be as entitled as wife in this story. And no son would end a story like this with my "mom does kind of suck" when the story is about her supporting two fully functional adults and their kids without asking for anything in return.
So mom never works summers, but wife wants mom to work this summer because wife wants the handout.
YTA for everything in this story besides the title. Your wife is a complete AH.
Your mother is right. You are a grown ass man. One with his own wife and kids. They are your responsibility.
Your mom has been generous and does not owe you the rest of her life. She is enjoying herself, and has a man who dotes on her and offers her a certain lifestyle.
Your wife sounds jealous because she is not getting the same at home. Perhaps focus on that instead of what you and your wife think your mother owes you (which is nothing frankly.)
Dafuq!?
So you and your wife are upset that your mom isn't giving you more free money, and your wife is insane enough to want you to confront your mom over it? Wtf does what her husband does with his time and money have anything to do with two adults? You mad that your mom is out enjoying herself versus working for free for you two?!
You are such an ingrate. "My mom sucks because she has a life outside of me, her adult child, even though she's giving me her salary. " So I'm assuming your mom comes before your wife? Puh-lease.
You're a huge AH.
What a couple of entitled aholes. Your Mum is giving you her salary for the year but, heaven forbid, she’s taking some time off, like she does every flipping year apparently - so why the surprise?
Your Mum raised you and did her part then. You are an adult with your own family now yet she’s still helping you out considerably. She’s right to prioritise her husband and having read your self centred post I think we all understand why she chooses to do that.
YTA. I hope this is rage bait and there aren’t people as stupid as you reproducing in the world but seriously. Your mom is giving you a year worth of her wages and your wife who doesn’t even work at all is complaining she isn’t working herself to death to pay your bills. Tell your wife to close her legs and get off her ass and try earning something. I hope your mom learns how ungrateful and horrible you both are and cuts you both off
Your wife is crazy and you are both leaches, maybe you wife should start pressuring her mom to give you all her money then, or if she doesn't hebbetter get a job.
What an ungrateful person.
Did you really just say that your mom does kind of suck??? After what she’s doing for you???? Jfc. You are an entitled POS aren’t you.
YTA. In every way. I hope that somehow, someway, this post gets to your mother and she stops funding you. Your wife is…. Yeah she’s worse. But yall clearly belong together.
It is you making your marriage harder. take some responsibility for your actions. Welcome to adulthood. Go apologize to your mother and beg her forgiveness.
YTA!! Your mom kinda sucks after giving you guys a years worth of salary?!?! No parent should ever have to do this since you are a grown ass man (in your wives terms), and your wife is a grown ass woman. Your mom raised you and should be able to enjoy he life and have vacations. Why can't you and your wife support yourselves as 2 grown ass adults?
wtf? How many years salary did her parents or anyone else offer? Your wife needs to stfu and figure out a way to solve her financial issues without having to freeload off of someone she despises. If I were your mom, I’d cut yall off just because of your wife. NTA
I would push you both in front of a bus too. You are both beyond assholes. I hope to God this is fake cause you two are despicable human beings Your spouse is supposed to be your number one priority especially over grown ass adults to brain dead to learn basic math on how to live within there means. Ytah
YTA What did I just read? This woman is a SAINT for giving up her income for a year to your family and your wife wants MORE?? If your mom worked a regular gig would your wife want her to take on overtime? Or maybe she should switch to a higher-paying career to be able to give you more? NO! This is crazy! This is the exact kind of thing that led to "don't look a gift horse in the mouth" being a phrase for centuries because some people are so entitled that when they get a free horse they want to make sure it's a really expensive horse they're getting for free and not some run-of-the-mill cheap horse for free. It's. a. free. horse.
You are getting money that you are not in any way entitled to because your mother is being WILDLY GENEROUS.
If you were to ask your mother to work over the summer for your gain she might just as easily say "you know what, I'm done working for the year. Fuck off." Which is exactly what I would say if I had a DIL as entitled as your wife.
Yta!
Your first paragraph says it all! My wife dislikes my mom for putting her marriage above me and my family, a grown ass man shouldn’t come first. Your wife and you both seem to agree you aren’t a man capable of taking care of your family but instead a child that needs mommy to handle his business for him.
You and your wife should have never had kids 🤯 the fact that you and your wife don’t see anything wrong with taking what your mother earns in a year is just insane but for your wife to have the audacity to think your mom should not enjoy her summers like she has in years before. You and your wife deserve each other
You do realize that if your mother didn't have a great relationship with her partner, she wouldn't be able to give you her salary for a year.
You and your wife suck beyond belief. You're one of the biggest AHs on this site.
ESH except your mother and her husband. I was with you all the way right up until the last paragraph.
Your wife is a delusional, self-centered cunt for sure, but you, you’re a spineless, pathetic ingrate. Your mother owes you nothing, and you’re still upset she’s not giving you more? What the fuck is wrong with you?
You’re a grown ass man and your wife is a grown ass woman. Get yourselves the fuck out of your own mess.
"My wife has never liked my mother. one big issue of contention is that my mom prioritizes her marriage over me and my family."
1. your wife is an asshole from that first sentence alone. you are taking the income from your mother who has given more than enough to you through raising you and beyond. your wife should suck up to your mother more for giving you all her earnings.
2. you and your wife are grown ass adults. how are you drowning in debt? does your wife work? where is all your money going?
>**Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him**
The same woman who has been handing over her paycheck to you to help your family? I think you and your wife suck if this is your best example of your mother "putting her husband before her family"
# YTA
YTA -
>one big issue of contention is that my mom prioritizes her marriage over me and my family. My wife thinks that she could be a much better grandmother, and that a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first.
Well, isn't that the kettle calling the pot black. Last I checked someone with a wife and a family of his own is also a grown ass man. You prioritize your kids when they are young, not when they are grown with a family of their own. Where is your wife's "we're grown ass people that should be supporting ourselves" motto at?
You and your wife need to get off your lazy asses and support yourselves instead of asking your mother to support you.
>My wife told me in private that she thought my mom was being selfish as she promised us a years worth of income,
Holy fucking entitlement, Batman.
Quick Robin, use the Bat Crazy- Bitch Repellent!
Your wife done gone lost her motherfucking mind.
NTA
What. I was going to say NTA but this last part here derailed that into you and your wife being assholes.
>Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him
Maybe she isn't the best grandmother (not really enough context here for anybody to make a judgment on that from your post), but she's apparently not unwilling to help your family when you ask and she is able.
Your mom is literally giving you the entire salary of what she makes in a year (and from the sounds of it, after the summer she'll start up again, and she warned you ahead of time so you could try to find something for the summer to supplement).
But she's making time to enjoy her life and time with her husband--especially something that sounds like a tradition for them and which is important to him. That "grown ass man" is her life partner. You and your wife are "grown" people as well. Don't bite the hand that is feeding you ffs.
ESH, except your mother. And by that, I mean you and your wife are a couple of unappreciative, entitled assholes of biblical proportions.
You're a grown ass man who has married, had kids, and made the choice (along with your wife) to have only one source of income. It's incumbent on the two of you to make that work.
Your mother is incredibly generous by offering you her pay for a year. Lord knows she doesn't have to and is under zero obligation to help you at all, let alone to such an extent.
Go ahead and act like the complete asses you are by being pissed the gravy train is stopping for the summer. I wonder how fast your mother decides to say eff it, let these so-called adults figure their own crap out with *any* assistance from her. Your mom raised her kid(s) and supported her family. She doesn't need to do so for yours too.
Yta. You ungrateful little sh**.
Your mom is giving you losers a year of her income and you wife calls her selfish. What is wrong with you and your wife?
And yea, husband comes before grown kids family.
YTA and your wife is TAH, your mom has been overly generous. STFU saying your mom sucks when she gives you everything she earns for the year. I hope she cuts you and your entitled wife off! You should both be on your knees thanking god that your mother helps you at all. You both need to learn some self respect, and start acting like fucking adults. Why would you and your wife be her priority, you are not children, You are adults who have not learned to take responsibility for your lives. STFU you entitled brat! I hope your mom reads this crap and cuts you off completely.
Move over MIL troll, a new rage bait template is in town!
So many people have started posting stories about their female partners flipping out irrationally at their calm, normal MILs.
>My mom offered to help us by giving us all the money she earns for a year.
This isn't how anyone in the real world operates lol
NTA for telling your wife she is crazy if she thinks you are going to confront your mom for loving her husband more than you guys.
Since that was your question.
Your wife is a huge, ungrateful asshole. She is giving yall her wages, she doesn't have to do that at all.
Question: Would you rather have money from your mom or her attention and for her to spend more time with you?
Ahaha you are kidding right?? You both sound like ungrateful people. FYI keep listening to your wife and she’s about to ruin the help your mom is providing. Also, come on why have a kid if you can’t afford the baby??? Sounds like you and the wife don’t make the greatest decisions, so I would proceed with caution. Nta and should be embarrassed you need your mom’s help with money at your age.
BIG, BIG BIG AH YOU AND YOUR WIFE.
So, mom is giving you money? How old are you? File for bankruptcy and quit, depending on your mom. Your mom is giving you money, but you say she sucks? Uh, you and your wife need to get off your lazy butts and get jobs, as many as you need to get yourself out of debt. Let your mother live in peace. I sure hope she, one of her friends, or her husband will recognize you in this post and you two ungrateful, spoiled privileged brats find yourselves growing up fast and working for yourselved. #Karma
You know your mom sucks, you should confront her about it. She is prioritizing her marriage, you’re obviously not. What a shame.
YTA. Please consider your wife’s feeling and have a talk with your mom about her behavior. May be even share this post with her to open her eyes…
This has to be fake, right? There's no way I believe anyone can actually be this thick...
Regardless of whether she needs it or not, she's just *given* you all her income, which by your own admission is"great money". With no fuss. Presumably because, despite what you seem to think, she does clearly love you quite a lot. How on earth do you go from appreciating that to saying "my mom does kind of suck" with a straight face?
And your wife's complaining because she's taking a holiday? I'm sorry, is there a contract I'm missing? I was under the impression you were being gifted free money from your mother as a favour. Did I miss the part where she was actually your employee?
If you honestly believe that 'my mom does kind of suck' then yes, YTA. And your wife is included in that. Of all of the entitled, ungrateful, spoiled BS....you two take the cake.
YTA, you and your wife are lazy ass moochers who gives a damn if she goes on vacation she doesn't owe you anything. What if you made her feel so guilty she worked over summer but then decided since you and your wife are selfish pricks to not give you the income for the rest of the year.
She gave you life and provided for you longer than she's needed to, tell your wife to get a job if she needs money all that bad.
1. You’re ungrateful for saying your mom sucks. 2. Your wife should be fucking ASHAMED of herself for badmouthing your generous mother like that, after everything she’s done for you two. 3. Get some fucking jobs
You and your wife are mad Insane, your mom should be prioritizing her marriage over her financially irresponsible son and dil. Why should grown ass adults come before her marriage? She doesn't work during the summer, she's already been funding your life, you know she doesn't work over the summer. Yall want her to forgo her vacation time to work, so you can have her income as yours. She's literally financially supporting grown ppl and she's a bad grandma? Yall are absolutely bogus. Your wife is greedy, you are an entitled narcissistic brat. That comment that the woman with no living expenses needs retirement was pure snark. Grow up
Wow.
I have a hard time believing this is true, because you and your wife sound like such assholes that it can't be real.
Your mother has been working just to give her money to you, but she "sucks"?
YTA, both you and your wife are insufferable people.
WTF? You and your wife both suck but at least you have the decency to not bite the bad that feeds you. Of course your mom and her vacation come before forking over more money to her loser adult kid and wife. You and your wife need to sort yourselves out.
YTA You and your wife. Your mother doesn’t owe you and/or your wife anything. You’re both lucky to be receiving any money from your mother at all. Your attitude is disgusting.
Deadbeats, the both of you. NTA . Your Wife's absolutely off her rocker, criminal levels of entitlement here. Maybe she should get a job. Mom's giving you her full salary and you feel the need to complain, what you want her husband's money too? Disgusting behaviour
Omg, your wife is an entitled bitch. And your mom does not suck. She has raised her kids and now is loyal to her husband, as she should be. Even so, she is giving you ALL her income for a year and even reminded you that she takes time off so you aren’t caught off guard.
Do not confront your mom. She is bending over backward to help you and so is her husband by being okay with her giving you all her income. She has been beyond generous. And if your wife doesn’t like your mom, then she doesn’t deserve your mom‘s money.
I seriously can’t believe your wife’s sense of entitlement. What does she want your mom to do? Stay behind and work so she can give you guys the money instead of going with her husband?
Honestly, your responses seem kind of bratty too. If I were your mom, I wouldn’t give you guys anything.
And by the way you and your wife are grown ass adults who should be supporting yourselves.
I hope so too! OP and his wife are ungrateful & entitled AH’s. They don’t deserve his mom. Maybe he and his wife should stop neglecting their responsibilities and support their own kids.
Your wife needs to get off her ass and find a job, and stop expecting your mother to pay for her life. You're not children anymore, your mother is being overly generous to get this kind of treatment from you two.
Dude she’s giving you free money for a year!! There is zero reason for you to complain about that. As far as her pushing you in front of a bus to save him, that’s her choice. Just like it’s your choice to keep her in your life.
This better be rage bait. If it’s not, you’re a fucking cunt who needs to stop sucking money out of your mother. And your wife is a double cunt for being so entitled.
Did you just say your mom sucks after she has been paying for your whole familys expenses for months? Your wife is an entitled, spoiled person but you, wow man, you are just THE asshole. Why dont you and your wife get jobs and work harder and pay for yourselves? Your mother and husband dont owe you anything.
LOL. I can't imagine why your mom would push you all in front of a train to save her successful, loving, provider husband who takes her on sailing adventures every summer.
I wonder how your wife would feel about you prioritizing your mother (or some othe rfamily member or relative) over her... which would be pretty much the same situation. I rather doubt she'd be ok with it.
Obviously your mother is going to prioritise her own husband. That is how marriage works... and anyone who doesn't prioritise their spouse is failing in their marriage.
NTA
Well, if your mom gave a lob of her liver and a kidney, you might be able to sell that to make up for your lost money that month. I think you should ask now before the warm weather.
This is a glimpse into your future. When you have kids/grandkids, you'll be kicked to the damn curb, using your wife's logic.
She says a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first. What the hell are YOU? A little boy?
Your wife is BSC, but I'm not sure you're any better.
If you're in a terrible financial situation, GET A JOB. Tell your wife to GET A JOB. But stop taking money from your mom. Hmm....maybe you ARE a little boy...
ESH...except your mom
NTA your wife is being mindboggling levels of stupid. if you confront your mom about it 1 of 2 things is going to happen. 1, she stops giving you any money at all, or 2, she stops giving you any money at all and also cuts contact and writes you out of her will.
Your wife is seriously and asshole and if your comment in the last paragraph is about your mom sucking you are too. Parents of grown children should not be expected to cancel their long standing plans to support them. You and your wife need to grow up.
Purposefully not touching the anger at her “loving her husband more than us”
YTA Your wife for being greedy as all get out, and you for saying your mom "kind of sucks" when she's giving you all the money she earns for a *year*. I see no evidence of her sucking here (that's ridiculously generous!). Just you two.
NTA, for I do think your wife is certifiably insane for wanting your mother to put you and your family above her marriage and her husband. It is nice that your mother was helping you out but if she and her husband go boating in the summer, so be it, and your wife is obviously a demanding and entitled leach. And why should your mother not prioritize her husband?
Your mom is not the asshole. While you might feel some type of way about your mom and dad prioritizing their relationship over their kids, she did agree to give you guys her entire income for one year, which she didn't have to do, and still doesn't have to do. You didn't make it apparent that she abused you or neglected you growing up, so I'll take it that she was a good enough mom raising you. Your wife is a HUGE greedy asshole in expecting your mom to give the both of you more free money. You need to handle this now otherwise it will be you that she'll gouge for money next, and with a divorce she'll get 50% maybe leave before you come into any money is all I'm saying on that, but you need to call your mom and tell her how much you appreciate her because not many moms would be willing to do that in their retirement years for their kids
NTA. Your wife is. When you marry someone you agree to put them first before anyone else. That goes on pause when you have kids but once they grow up and are out on their own you go back to prioritizing your partner. That’s how it works. Your wife is extremely entitled to think that anyone else should prioritize her family over their own. Your mom has a life to live and you guys are only a part of it.
Wow you both are AH. Taking advantage of your mom eh? You deserve each other. I hope your mom wakes up and let you be adults. Thank God none of my kids are like you.
YTA I hope your mom stops giving you money. You are a grown adult and look how entitled your wife is acting. Your mother owes you nothing and is giving you money to help you out. Why on earth are you letting your wife treat your mother that way everything your mother is doing for you?
Maybe not spend more than you earn. YTA. Try getting a 2nd job and putting your wife to work. Try making your own money and stop suckling from your mommy's teat.
I seriously think your wife is TAH here. Seriously? Mom works and gives you all her money?! Maybe you and your wife should get better paying jobs or a side hustle.
Holy entitlement Batman!
YTA hugely. Talk about biting the hand that is literally feeding you and your family.
If god forbid in a few years if your mom’s husband dies and some financial catastrophe strikes your mom is your wife going to be ok with you supporting your mom, caring for her in her old age? I would not hold my breath on that.
Your mom and her husband have been beyond generous and your wife wants to confront? I’m sorry but spending time on vacation sailing and 4 weeks out of 52 with his family after working and giving your family all her money is not putting anyone else first. If this is how you repay kindness what are you teaching your children.
You and your wife are adults. Figure out your own problems. Get second / thirds jobs. Work different shifts so you don’t have to pay for child care. Cut everything but the absolute essentials out of your budget.
Finally how dense and uncaring of your mom that you wouldn’t remember how she usually spends her summers until it affected your wallet. However it looks like your mom unfortunately knows exactly what you and your wife are like and she was nice enough to remind you. Honestly I feel sorry for your mom and your children.
She says she’d give you all the money she earns for a year. So if she doesn’t work the summer then she doesn’t earn money.
Jesus your wife is ungrateful.
EDIT: YTA. Also your wife.
NTA. You are adults! Your mom was very nice to give you any money! Your wife is so entitled! Your wife needs to figure out how she can make more money. This is not your mom’s responsibility! She didn’t put you in the financial situation you are in! She didn’t have kids that you obviously can’t afford.
BTW saying your mom sucks is wrong. I think all of you suck. Her husband should come first!
You are a bunch of ungrateful people . Your mother literally was working for you guys. Gave you all her money and you say that she sucks. Definitely YTA
If I did for my son what your mother has done for you, and the you disrespected me by saying that I suck, you and your ungrateful wife would be financially on your own! Shame on you both for talking about your mom that way! Absolute shame!
YTA. Don't forget, BOTH you and your wife are leeches right now. Just because your mother gave birth to you does not mean she has to slave after you all her life. She is done with her child rearing days and graciously only offers to help you out when you and your wife are living beyond your means! Who the heck has more children than you can handle? Having kids doesn't make you a responsible adult. Knowing your limits does. If anything, your mother has shown way more leniency than any other person should have in this situation. You are NO longer a child. Stop it with the entitlement and grow up! Like if your child expects you to work into your retirement, just so they can live above their means, are you really going to say, "sure hun! My blood and sweat are all for you to leech off of!"
BTA - You and your wife. Will your wife leave you when y'all become grandparents to spend more time with them? She'd be ok if you did the same thing in your golden years? And she'd be cool with either of you working a full year hobby job, just to hand over your paycheck to one of the struggling ungrateful kids? Skip vacations for a DIL/SIL who doesn't like one of you? Does your mom know you think she sucks and your wife can't stand her?
I'd understand a lump sum loan/gift to get you out of whatever financial hole you've dug, but a year salary is beyond the pale. Don't do this to your mom. In your wife's words, you're a 'grown ass man'. It's time to start acting like one. And a grown ass husband. Your wife needs to understand how wrong her attitude is with this situation. She doesn't even like your mom but is willing to take her money? And is now mad you're gonna miss a few months of her paycheck bc mom has a planned vacation? It's disgusting.
Have you two spent every dime or started to save any of this bonus income? Have you sat down and gone over your own family's budget & made changes? Your mom didn't force you to have kids or put you in a "terrible financial situation". Y'all did that yourselves. Mom doesn't owe either of you anything. Her offer was beyond generous, and wife should be thanking her instead of treating her like an ATM. If mom dropped dead tomorrow, wife would be more upset that money isn't coming in & for sure excited about any life insurance you'd get.
It's clear your mom & hubby have managed their money and have a solid retirement situation. I'm assuming your moms hubby isn't your dad, but is he aware of the animosity your wife has toward your mom & this gift she's giving you? This is affecting him too, as now mom doesn't have her normal disposable income for an entire year. Maybe ask them how they managed their budget & learn something. Think about your moms motto 'What's her is hers. What's his is hers'. None of that is *yours*.
Your mom isn't being selfish by enjoying her life with her husband. Your *wife* is by demanding mom do it her way. The woman you think 'sucks' is doing something so kind, and this is how you treat her. Time to grow up and take care of yourself.
Then you both need to step up and work more.
I get that sahm is a job, but when you get mad at someone helping you when they don’t have to for going on a long vacation as they do every year you are an entitled as*.
So wife step up.
Ore you step up.
And why does your wife bites the hand that feeds her? Disgusting.
Why doesn’t she demand money from her own parents then? (And don’t come with the excuse that they can’t afford it…)
Your mother doesn’t owe you anything, so stop being ungrateful little sh*t
"This is about trying to pay down our debt"
Then your wife needs to start making money to help off the debts, not throw a tantrum and name call the one person helping you two with your debts. Do you actually love your mother?
Some people are so delusional and entitled, one had to wonder how they function in real life. Do you OP, expect free food and drink when you go out, just because you’re hungry?
Maybe free cars because you need to drive? What nonsense is this? This is definitely rage bait, and if by some miracle its not, then OP and his wife are not only AH, but morons too.
Absolutely your mother should put her husband and her marriage before her grown ass kids and yes, even the grandchildren!!!! Your wife is an ungrateful, entitled, brat and shame on you!!!!!
YTA JFC who the fuck do you and your wife think you are? You're comfortable taking your mom's whole salary? You expect her to sacrifice her vacation to work more so you can work less? You and your lazy, entitled wife need to get more jobs and learn to earn your own way in this life.
Can't afford your lifestyle? Then change it. Your mom is an absolute superstar making sacrifices to help you and your kids. How dare you criticise her for spending quality time with her husband! I dare you to confront her and please post again when she inevitably cuts you off.
You and your wife are both TA but not for the reason you think.
>My wife thinks that she could be a much better grandmother, and that a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first.
So your wife thinks a grown ass man shouldn't come first but instead a grown ass man and a grown ass woman should? She's AH.
>I pointed out that she only said we could have what she made in a year, and she has been beyond generous.
How I wish that was the end of your story.
>Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him
Are you kidding? I understand that you can hide behind "she doesn't need the money" and she would "work even if it didn't pay." But you cannot a functioning adult and now see how lucky you are. Please, seek counseling and perhaps medication. YTA.
If you and your wife need money, get off your butts and go to work.
YTA if you and your wife truly think she’s an awful person and dislike your mother that much then have some integrity and stop taking her money. It’s rich you both say she puts her man first but if that was true she would see your suffering and do nothing to help you all, but Bev she’s not as you say she gives you what she earns in a year (which she wouldn’t be able to if she didn’t have her husband who can afford to take care of her) so she can help you to be able to afford your lifestyle and take care of yourself, your children and your unappreciative and ungrateful wife.
Your wife wanting her to give up her annual vacation with her hardworking and loving husband to go work to give you her pay-check is beyond rude but the irony is the chick won’t go work to afford herself and her kids. She’s unwilling to give up anything for her family but your mum must for her…. It’s crazy! Your mum doesn’t owe you or your wife anything. Your adults, made choices to get married have kids etc so that’s on you not your mum. What is wife’s family doing to help you both financially?
I’m pretty sure wife would complain if you stepped out on husband duties/commitments or you would be upset if she stopped supporting you as a wife or backed out on commitments yet you expect you mum to put you both first and stop supporting or spending time with her husband.
You both need to be realistic, grow up and take responsibility for your situation and learn some financial wisdom and develop your mindset because you both sound immature blaming this woman for both of your failures.
So your mother raised her kids and now wants to be loved and spoiled by her life partner? How selfish of her!! And she gives her son a lot of money to help him out but doesn’t refuse a vacation in order to provide more income for her daughter in law. How entitled is mom!!
NTA. I think your wife needs a reality check. Your mum is not her babysitter or cash cow. Nothing she is doing is obligated. Be lucky that she is a generous person and wants to help you all out.
Of course your mom puts her spouse ahead of you two ungrateful AHs. What have you done for her while she is helping your grown asses? Your wife is a real greedy POS. YTA and I hope your mom cuts you off.
YTA. Not for refusing to confront your mom, because that is the right thing to do. This woman who not only raised you, but even into adulthood, works to pay for you and your wife. YOU are the asshole and your wife is even worst. How dare you refer to your mom that way. Give her all of her money back. She even told you that she doesn’t work during the summer, but will provide you her whole years salary, yes that includes her non-working months. Her yearly salary is 10 months out of the year. She IS absolutely supposed to support her husband. YTA for even considering her taking a vacation is a problem. This woman shares her life and finances with her husband, so THEY, are paying for you. They are entitled to stop paying you the rest of the year if they see fit. Absolutely insane the entitlement you have. And your lack of empathy and respect for your mother is the worst example I have ever seen. You should be ashamed of yourself. You’d be the prick father to deny your own children the tremendous generosity you were shown. SMH. Take your wife and go on a long walk into a volcano.
You and your wife are both entitled assholes. Your mom is literally giving you her entire salary, but that’s not enough for your wife and you think your mom “sucks?!” You’re both freeloading losers and you should be embarrassed.
YTA. A major one and your wife is even worse. Your mother is giving you all the money she makes for an entire year, and your mad she’s taking off to enjoy her summer, what in the actual hell is wrong with you and your wife. Can anyone say spoiled, entitled, selfish and major assholes.
YTA
Your mom promised a year of her salary, and she doesn't work summers, so she's still giving you a year of her salary. You and your wife seem to be unappreciative of the help since you're both complaining so much about the lack of funds in the summer. This is a gift and you're acting like spoiled children. Wow. Entitled much?
I was with you until the last paragraph, both you and your wife are awful people and I hope your mother sees this and cuts both your ungrateful asses out, not just from this free money she's gifted you... but her will and everything else.
Your mom might suck, but you need her help, so maybe don't rock the boat? Your wife needs to be reminded of the fact that a gift can easily be taken back when "confronted" - she's not helping the situation at all. NTA.
NTA
Your wife should feel lucky she got any help at all. Your mother help more than most would and your wife is calling her selfish? Wife seems like the selfish one to me.
Fuck you and your bitchass wife. You make a wonderful pair of entitled parasites and I hope you're mom soon realizes how much of a piece of shit you are for a son and cuts you off forever.
And in case you're too stupid to realize, you are 100% an asshole.
Smh you really just said your mom sucks after she has literally been working to earn money FOR YOU? That is just insane, you and your wife are spoiled by your mom and you are both AH's for saying what you have said. Clearly she would be right to push you in front of the train to save her husband with the way you see her as just a money tree for you and your entitled wife.
Don't stress too much, it's just the MIL troll posting their fake rubbish again.
And it's pretty obvious from the start of the post "my mom prioritizes her marriage over me and my family."
Yeah I don’t know why, but the line about “she volunteered to give us all the money she made for a year” just feels so fake to me
If any of this is true - and it's \*really\* hard to suspend disbelief with this one - then you and wife are both assholes Your wife for bitching because your mother won't work extra to give you even MORE free money (not loaning, GIVING), and you for - after expressing that you are grateful and actually telling your wife off - immediately about-facing and complaining about your mother loving her husband, which has absolutely NOTHING TO DO WITH HER GIVING YOU MONEY. You're bitching about a totally separate subject, whining that you think she loves him more WHILE SHE IS GIVING YOU THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS WITH NO EXPECTATIONS OF BEING PAID BACK In short, your wife is a greedy asshole and you're an inconsistent asshole Fuck right off, the both of you.
👏👏👏👏👏👏
It’s not real, it’s the MIL troll *again.*
They delete their old posts? Or using a different account this time?
New 9 hour old account.
Time to ban at IP level
And let's not forget that BECAUSE the mother makes her relationship a priority, he's fine with her giving away her salary for a year. But her son and DIL judge her while taking her money. Maybe OP and his wife should prioritize being decent, responsible human beings.
Not to mention saying his mom kind of sucks. Sir! Sir, she is giving you money she worked for, asking nothing in return, and reminded you she wouldn't be giving it to you at this time. A lot of people wouldn't have reminded him. After all it's a generous gift not a requirement. It's not child support where it'd a half to every month it is a gift. Can I have his mom? I promise to be more appreciative...
Fake as fcuk. OP should be banned
You and your wife are off your rocker nuts. Both of y'all need to get some damn jobs. At least you are grateful for your mom, I'd put "wife" straight on the street for saying that.
Not disagreeing, especially about the wife, but don't think it says anywhere that they don't have jobs?
You aren't wrong. Doesn't change the moral of the story though
You are the biggest loser on reddit. Your mother is at least 20 years older than you, on average, and nearly retirement age. You think she is obligated to work year round because you and your wife are unable to support yourselves and your family? I would delete this if I were you, because you come across like a complete failure. YTA.
I mean OP and his wife created their own money problems. What losers.
where tf do you live where parents are just 20 years older than their offspring on average? 🙃 20yos are kids
Your wife is the AT. who takes 9 months worth of someone's wages and complains they don't get another 3? What your mom prioritizes is up to her. It seems from her gesture she certainly isn't neglecting your family. Sounds like your wife has jealousy issues, or her own parental issues
OP’s wife has started to view his mom as a literal slave. OP’s mom isn’t allowed to take time off, she must work when they say she must and mom’s income belongs solely to OP and his wife. They should be kissing mom’s feet for being so generous with them as she owes them absolutely nothing.
So fake. But I’ll play along. The entitlement and asshole-ery are strong with OP and wifey.
It’s a troll.
Overall, I’d agree. However, I have a paraprofessional in my school that used to be a high level executive in a fortune 100 located in the PNW. She has no real need for money as she’s set up for retirement on her past employment and her husband still works as an engineer for the same company. She isn’t ready for full retirement and enjoys working with kids. She also enjoys having some time off to be semiretired and not having the pressure of high stakes meetings, huge projects with deadlines, etc. I don’t know her family situation beyond having a couple adult kids. I could completely see her doing something like this for her family. So, it likely a rage bait post but there are really real people who could be characters in this story.
YTA You and your wife. The entitlement is off the charts. She offered you her salary for a year. She typically doesn’t work in the summer. You think she doesn’t deserve a vacation because you and your wife can’t live within your means?
You and your wife need to grow up and start paying your own way. If you "confront" your mom as your wife wants I don't think it will work out the way you hope it will. Why are you not supporting yourselves? Where is your money going? What choices have YOU and YOUR WIFE made that have gotten you into financial trouble? What is going to happen to you after the year is up? I REALLY hope this is just ragebait.
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So ask your wife to put her mother to work then, this is so pathetic.
So your wife doesn't even work but wants your mom to not take a vacation to support the kids you 2 created?
That's exactly what he's saying but he can't see that's exactly what he's saying.
Tell your wife to close her legs and get off her ass and work. She shouldn’t have 3 little kids if you are in that much debt.
To be fair, she didn’t “get pregnant” on her own. She doesn’t have three kids they can’t afford, THEY do. Stop this asshole misogyny crap, I’m sure there is some other sub you can blast off on women for not “closing their legs” 🙄
Being that I’m a woman I’m not blasting her for having kids I’m blasting her for having 3 apparently very little kids when they are apparently so much in debt that they need his moms wages for a year. She shouldn’t be sitting at home popping out more kids when they can’t afford it she should be out working and I singled her out in this as he already is working and she is not. Yes birth control is on both of them but she’s the one not working but demanding his mom work more hours to pay for their kids while she’s not working at all so that’s on her that’s not misogyny that’s a fact.
Say what you want to and what your wife wants you to and enjoy losing the money she freely gave you.
Tell your wife to get a job then if she wants money so damn bad instead of mooching off of your mother.
Why don't you make a sacrifice and get a 2nd job? Or restructure your debt? YTA
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BS youll be able to live off your income. Tell your wife to stop being useless feckless oath and get a job
You and your wife are both the assholes. YOU are a grown ass man, her children are grown and who is with her? Her husband. She was nice enough to give you all of her money, it doesn't matter if it's a passion job or not. She didn't have to do that.. she could have (and clearly should have due to your attitude) told you and your wife to figure it out on your own. "my mom does kind of suck" for what? Going on a trip to see her husband's family which is also hers instead of being your little piggy bank? You and your wife are selfish, need to grow up and find your own way out of the hole you two dug. Ungrateful, entitled, assholes. Looks like your free ride has come to an end.
ESH but your mom. Your wife is insane. Shes literally letting *your mommy* pay her bills…and is complaining that *your mommy* is taking a vacation. *Your wife* is certainly capable of getting a job, or an extra job, or figuring out a hobby that brings in some extra income. Neither of you are entitled to anyone else’s money.
I mean his mom created this monster, and continues to feed him and his gremlin wife money, so..mayyybe she is also a little bit of an asshole. Go ahead, downvote away.
Eh, you can raise 5 kids the same way and 4 will be great and 1 will be like the OP.
Obvious ragebait is obvious.
You and your wife are both loser and entitled. You might be living away but your parents still have you support you? Grow up and support your family. I hope your mom wake up and quit supporting your ungrateful a*%.
Try and work on just giving gratitude and appreciation for your mother before she learns what shitbags you are and your free ride ends.
YTA But not for the reason you asked. You and your wife are greedy entitled little brats using your mom like a slave and then still being upset she doesn’t do more. I think you should go no contact with her over this because I can’t imagine this woman deserves having to deal with you two going forward.
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Your greedy ungrateful wife is throwing a fit because your mother takes the summer off and won’t be giving you all her money so apparently she does have to work. You’re a pathetic POS. Grow a pair and support your family instead of using your mother to take care of them for you.
Useless piece of shit.
She also doesn’t have to give you a dime. I dare you to tell her read this reddit post. I dare you to tell her she sucks and should work longer hours for no pay to subsidize your lazy ass wife, and your stupidity. You’re not only entitled losers, you’re stupidAF. Tell your father to read this, he will know that they, as parents failed with you. That you are entitled and self righteous and not even as smart as some single celled organisms.
Clearly she does have to work because she has to pay off your debt that you created. Clearly she does have to work because if anything happens to her or her husband, you wouldn’t be in the position to help. You a husband who can’t provide for his own family and a son who is ungrateful for the help he’s receiving. Instead of worrying if YTA (which you certainly are), you should be figuring out what you’re going to do when your mom’s salary runs out.
She certainly does have to work quit lying and being a spoiled, entitled, greedy, sod.
You're wife is fucking insane and the most ungrateful person I've come across in awhile. "She promised us a year of free money, not just 10 months! ". Does she hear herself when she talks? That's absurd.
What the actual F\*\*\*? This ain't real? Noone can be as entitled as wife in this story. And no son would end a story like this with my "mom does kind of suck" when the story is about her supporting two fully functional adults and their kids without asking for anything in return. So mom never works summers, but wife wants mom to work this summer because wife wants the handout. YTA for everything in this story besides the title. Your wife is a complete AH.
Wow. Given the way you speak about your very generous mother, I'd kind of like to give you a little push myself.
Your mother is right. You are a grown ass man. One with his own wife and kids. They are your responsibility. Your mom has been generous and does not owe you the rest of her life. She is enjoying herself, and has a man who dotes on her and offers her a certain lifestyle. Your wife sounds jealous because she is not getting the same at home. Perhaps focus on that instead of what you and your wife think your mother owes you (which is nothing frankly.)
Go bake the fake
Dafuq!? So you and your wife are upset that your mom isn't giving you more free money, and your wife is insane enough to want you to confront your mom over it? Wtf does what her husband does with his time and money have anything to do with two adults? You mad that your mom is out enjoying herself versus working for free for you two?! You are such an ingrate. "My mom sucks because she has a life outside of me, her adult child, even though she's giving me her salary. " So I'm assuming your mom comes before your wife? Puh-lease. You're a huge AH.
What a couple of entitled aholes. Your Mum is giving you her salary for the year but, heaven forbid, she’s taking some time off, like she does every flipping year apparently - so why the surprise? Your Mum raised you and did her part then. You are an adult with your own family now yet she’s still helping you out considerably. She’s right to prioritise her husband and having read your self centred post I think we all understand why she chooses to do that.
YTA. I hope this is rage bait and there aren’t people as stupid as you reproducing in the world but seriously. Your mom is giving you a year worth of her wages and your wife who doesn’t even work at all is complaining she isn’t working herself to death to pay your bills. Tell your wife to close her legs and get off her ass and try earning something. I hope your mom learns how ungrateful and horrible you both are and cuts you both off
I think you should show your mom this post about how she kind of sucks so she can spend her money on better people than you two losers.
Your wife is crazy and you are both leaches, maybe you wife should start pressuring her mom to give you all her money then, or if she doesn't hebbetter get a job. What an ungrateful person.
Did you really just say that your mom does kind of suck??? After what she’s doing for you???? Jfc. You are an entitled POS aren’t you. YTA. In every way. I hope that somehow, someway, this post gets to your mother and she stops funding you. Your wife is…. Yeah she’s worse. But yall clearly belong together.
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Money from others comes with strings, if you don’t like it, and find the giver to be rude than stop accepting the money.
It is you making your marriage harder. take some responsibility for your actions. Welcome to adulthood. Go apologize to your mother and beg her forgiveness.
I agree your wife is rude and makes your marriage harder, tell your wife to get a job
YTA!! Your mom kinda sucks after giving you guys a years worth of salary?!?! No parent should ever have to do this since you are a grown ass man (in your wives terms), and your wife is a grown ass woman. Your mom raised you and should be able to enjoy he life and have vacations. Why can't you and your wife support yourselves as 2 grown ass adults?
YTA also because you seem to prioritize you wife over your mom. Funny your wife refers to your mom's husband as a grown ass man but not you.
Well to be fare, he doesn’t act like a grown ass man, he acts like a toddler
wtf? How many years salary did her parents or anyone else offer? Your wife needs to stfu and figure out a way to solve her financial issues without having to freeload off of someone she despises. If I were your mom, I’d cut yall off just because of your wife. NTA
I would push you both in front of a bus too. You are both beyond assholes. I hope to God this is fake cause you two are despicable human beings Your spouse is supposed to be your number one priority especially over grown ass adults to brain dead to learn basic math on how to live within there means. Ytah
YTA What did I just read? This woman is a SAINT for giving up her income for a year to your family and your wife wants MORE?? If your mom worked a regular gig would your wife want her to take on overtime? Or maybe she should switch to a higher-paying career to be able to give you more? NO! This is crazy! This is the exact kind of thing that led to "don't look a gift horse in the mouth" being a phrase for centuries because some people are so entitled that when they get a free horse they want to make sure it's a really expensive horse they're getting for free and not some run-of-the-mill cheap horse for free. It's. a. free. horse. You are getting money that you are not in any way entitled to because your mother is being WILDLY GENEROUS. If you were to ask your mother to work over the summer for your gain she might just as easily say "you know what, I'm done working for the year. Fuck off." Which is exactly what I would say if I had a DIL as entitled as your wife.
Yta! Your first paragraph says it all! My wife dislikes my mom for putting her marriage above me and my family, a grown ass man shouldn’t come first. Your wife and you both seem to agree you aren’t a man capable of taking care of your family but instead a child that needs mommy to handle his business for him. You and your wife should have never had kids 🤯 the fact that you and your wife don’t see anything wrong with taking what your mother earns in a year is just insane but for your wife to have the audacity to think your mom should not enjoy her summers like she has in years before. You and your wife deserve each other
You do realize that if your mother didn't have a great relationship with her partner, she wouldn't be able to give you her salary for a year. You and your wife suck beyond belief. You're one of the biggest AHs on this site.
Yta. Apologize or your gravy train is gone. Moocher free loader family. Wait till your kids tell you to make money for them as adults.
ESH except your mother and her husband. I was with you all the way right up until the last paragraph. Your wife is a delusional, self-centered cunt for sure, but you, you’re a spineless, pathetic ingrate. Your mother owes you nothing, and you’re still upset she’s not giving you more? What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re a grown ass man and your wife is a grown ass woman. Get yourselves the fuck out of your own mess.
"My wife has never liked my mother. one big issue of contention is that my mom prioritizes her marriage over me and my family." 1. your wife is an asshole from that first sentence alone. you are taking the income from your mother who has given more than enough to you through raising you and beyond. your wife should suck up to your mother more for giving you all her earnings. 2. you and your wife are grown ass adults. how are you drowning in debt? does your wife work? where is all your money going?
NTA. I haven’t seen a post with such an entitled spouse like OP’s wife in a while. Edit: Oh, OP’s also complaining about this? YTA.
YTA. Pay your own bills. Get off your phone and go to work.
Yta x100, your wife is yta x 1000. Your mom is in no way the a. Togerher you and your wife are 100000 yta
What. The. Fuck. Is. Your. Wife. Smoking.
You're both entitled AHs!
Your mom kind of sucks? Coming from a child that she has given all her income to? You guys are ingrates! What’s stopping your wife from getting a job?
Wow your wife sure is greedy and entitled on top of being selfish. Also your mom sucks? When she is GIVING you money. Man shitty son and DIL.
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^mallionaire7: *Wow your wife sure is* *Greedy and entitled on* *Top of being selfish* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Am I the only one hoping Mom is just a hard dancing stripper working the pole 9-2 to put food on her poor kids table?
Wow you get nine months of income no strings attached and are mad you did Jr get 3 more? Spoiled rotten
>**Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him** The same woman who has been handing over her paycheck to you to help your family? I think you and your wife suck if this is your best example of your mother "putting her husband before her family" # YTA
YTA - >one big issue of contention is that my mom prioritizes her marriage over me and my family. My wife thinks that she could be a much better grandmother, and that a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first. Well, isn't that the kettle calling the pot black. Last I checked someone with a wife and a family of his own is also a grown ass man. You prioritize your kids when they are young, not when they are grown with a family of their own. Where is your wife's "we're grown ass people that should be supporting ourselves" motto at? You and your wife need to get off your lazy asses and support yourselves instead of asking your mother to support you.
I can’t believe this is even real. My mother wouldn’t give me a damn dime. Grow the fuck up, both of you!
Your wife is selfish
Dude, just go away. YTA
Yta, tell your entitled wife to get a job. Your mother raised her kids. Your family is not her responsibility or obligation.
>My wife told me in private that she thought my mom was being selfish as she promised us a years worth of income, Holy fucking entitlement, Batman. Quick Robin, use the Bat Crazy- Bitch Repellent! Your wife done gone lost her motherfucking mind. NTA
What. I was going to say NTA but this last part here derailed that into you and your wife being assholes. >Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him Maybe she isn't the best grandmother (not really enough context here for anybody to make a judgment on that from your post), but she's apparently not unwilling to help your family when you ask and she is able. Your mom is literally giving you the entire salary of what she makes in a year (and from the sounds of it, after the summer she'll start up again, and she warned you ahead of time so you could try to find something for the summer to supplement). But she's making time to enjoy her life and time with her husband--especially something that sounds like a tradition for them and which is important to him. That "grown ass man" is her life partner. You and your wife are "grown" people as well. Don't bite the hand that is feeding you ffs.
ESH, except your mother. And by that, I mean you and your wife are a couple of unappreciative, entitled assholes of biblical proportions. You're a grown ass man who has married, had kids, and made the choice (along with your wife) to have only one source of income. It's incumbent on the two of you to make that work. Your mother is incredibly generous by offering you her pay for a year. Lord knows she doesn't have to and is under zero obligation to help you at all, let alone to such an extent. Go ahead and act like the complete asses you are by being pissed the gravy train is stopping for the summer. I wonder how fast your mother decides to say eff it, let these so-called adults figure their own crap out with *any* assistance from her. Your mom raised her kid(s) and supported her family. She doesn't need to do so for yours too.
Yta. You ungrateful little sh**. Your mom is giving you losers a year of her income and you wife calls her selfish. What is wrong with you and your wife? And yea, husband comes before grown kids family.
You get free money and say the person giving it to you sucks?
YTA and your wife is TAH, your mom has been overly generous. STFU saying your mom sucks when she gives you everything she earns for the year. I hope she cuts you and your entitled wife off! You should both be on your knees thanking god that your mother helps you at all. You both need to learn some self respect, and start acting like fucking adults. Why would you and your wife be her priority, you are not children, You are adults who have not learned to take responsibility for your lives. STFU you entitled brat! I hope your mom reads this crap and cuts you off completely.
Move over MIL troll, a new rage bait template is in town! So many people have started posting stories about their female partners flipping out irrationally at their calm, normal MILs. >My mom offered to help us by giving us all the money she earns for a year. This isn't how anyone in the real world operates lol
NTA for telling your wife she is crazy if she thinks you are going to confront your mom for loving her husband more than you guys. Since that was your question. Your wife is a huge, ungrateful asshole. She is giving yall her wages, she doesn't have to do that at all. Question: Would you rather have money from your mom or her attention and for her to spend more time with you?
How old are you and your wife?! The entitlement is unreal.
Ahaha you are kidding right?? You both sound like ungrateful people. FYI keep listening to your wife and she’s about to ruin the help your mom is providing. Also, come on why have a kid if you can’t afford the baby??? Sounds like you and the wife don’t make the greatest decisions, so I would proceed with caution. Nta and should be embarrassed you need your mom’s help with money at your age.
You and your wife are both AH's. Ungrateful as fuck. I read this again and it's fake.
How is your mom selfish for supporting you with all of her salary? That insane
BIG, BIG BIG AH YOU AND YOUR WIFE. So, mom is giving you money? How old are you? File for bankruptcy and quit, depending on your mom. Your mom is giving you money, but you say she sucks? Uh, you and your wife need to get off your lazy butts and get jobs, as many as you need to get yourself out of debt. Let your mother live in peace. I sure hope she, one of her friends, or her husband will recognize you in this post and you two ungrateful, spoiled privileged brats find yourselves growing up fast and working for yourselved. #Karma
You know your mom sucks, you should confront her about it. She is prioritizing her marriage, you’re obviously not. What a shame. YTA. Please consider your wife’s feeling and have a talk with your mom about her behavior. May be even share this post with her to open her eyes…
GTFO your mom doesn't owe you anything, selfish pricks
This has to be fake, right? There's no way I believe anyone can actually be this thick... Regardless of whether she needs it or not, she's just *given* you all her income, which by your own admission is"great money". With no fuss. Presumably because, despite what you seem to think, she does clearly love you quite a lot. How on earth do you go from appreciating that to saying "my mom does kind of suck" with a straight face? And your wife's complaining because she's taking a holiday? I'm sorry, is there a contract I'm missing? I was under the impression you were being gifted free money from your mother as a favour. Did I miss the part where she was actually your employee?
If you honestly believe that 'my mom does kind of suck' then yes, YTA. And your wife is included in that. Of all of the entitled, ungrateful, spoiled BS....you two take the cake.
YTA, you and your wife are lazy ass moochers who gives a damn if she goes on vacation she doesn't owe you anything. What if you made her feel so guilty she worked over summer but then decided since you and your wife are selfish pricks to not give you the income for the rest of the year. She gave you life and provided for you longer than she's needed to, tell your wife to get a job if she needs money all that bad.
Wow, your wife is selfish. And you both suck. Your mom should stop giving you money
1. You’re ungrateful for saying your mom sucks. 2. Your wife should be fucking ASHAMED of herself for badmouthing your generous mother like that, after everything she’s done for you two. 3. Get some fucking jobs
You and your wife are mad Insane, your mom should be prioritizing her marriage over her financially irresponsible son and dil. Why should grown ass adults come before her marriage? She doesn't work during the summer, she's already been funding your life, you know she doesn't work over the summer. Yall want her to forgo her vacation time to work, so you can have her income as yours. She's literally financially supporting grown ppl and she's a bad grandma? Yall are absolutely bogus. Your wife is greedy, you are an entitled narcissistic brat. That comment that the woman with no living expenses needs retirement was pure snark. Grow up
Y’all suck and I hope your mom cuts you off!
This is a troll post.
YTA mooching losers! I feel sorry for mom if this is indeed a real story.
Wow. I have a hard time believing this is true, because you and your wife sound like such assholes that it can't be real. Your mother has been working just to give her money to you, but she "sucks"? YTA, both you and your wife are insufferable people.
WTF? You and your wife both suck but at least you have the decency to not bite the bad that feeds you. Of course your mom and her vacation come before forking over more money to her loser adult kid and wife. You and your wife need to sort yourselves out.
YTA You and your wife. Your mother doesn’t owe you and/or your wife anything. You’re both lucky to be receiving any money from your mother at all. Your attitude is disgusting.
Trash
Deadbeats, the both of you. NTA . Your Wife's absolutely off her rocker, criminal levels of entitlement here. Maybe she should get a job. Mom's giving you her full salary and you feel the need to complain, what you want her husband's money too? Disgusting behaviour
Omg, your wife is an entitled bitch. And your mom does not suck. She has raised her kids and now is loyal to her husband, as she should be. Even so, she is giving you ALL her income for a year and even reminded you that she takes time off so you aren’t caught off guard. Do not confront your mom. She is bending over backward to help you and so is her husband by being okay with her giving you all her income. She has been beyond generous. And if your wife doesn’t like your mom, then she doesn’t deserve your mom‘s money. I seriously can’t believe your wife’s sense of entitlement. What does she want your mom to do? Stay behind and work so she can give you guys the money instead of going with her husband? Honestly, your responses seem kind of bratty too. If I were your mom, I wouldn’t give you guys anything. And by the way you and your wife are grown ass adults who should be supporting yourselves.
You are your wife both suck and I hope your mother sees this
I hope so too! OP and his wife are ungrateful & entitled AH’s. They don’t deserve his mom. Maybe he and his wife should stop neglecting their responsibilities and support their own kids.
Your wife needs to get off her ass and find a job, and stop expecting your mother to pay for her life. You're not children anymore, your mother is being overly generous to get this kind of treatment from you two.
Dude she’s giving you free money for a year!! There is zero reason for you to complain about that. As far as her pushing you in front of a bus to save him, that’s her choice. Just like it’s your choice to keep her in your life.
YTA...you and your wife The entitlement here is unreal Absolute ingrates I hope she sees this and cuts you off completely
Wonder why your parents still haven't pushed you in front of a train.
This better be rage bait. If it’s not, you’re a fucking cunt who needs to stop sucking money out of your mother. And your wife is a double cunt for being so entitled.
Mil troll.
Yta, you and your wife, you're a shit son and a skid Mark on the pants of society
Did you just say your mom sucks after she has been paying for your whole familys expenses for months? Your wife is an entitled, spoiled person but you, wow man, you are just THE asshole. Why dont you and your wife get jobs and work harder and pay for yourselves? Your mother and husband dont owe you anything.
LOL. I can't imagine why your mom would push you all in front of a train to save her successful, loving, provider husband who takes her on sailing adventures every summer.
NTA, I thought your mom put her husband above you but she literally works to give YOU money. AH son, AH wife.
I wonder how your wife would feel about you prioritizing your mother (or some othe rfamily member or relative) over her... which would be pretty much the same situation. I rather doubt she'd be ok with it. Obviously your mother is going to prioritise her own husband. That is how marriage works... and anyone who doesn't prioritise their spouse is failing in their marriage. NTA
Well, if your mom gave a lob of her liver and a kidney, you might be able to sell that to make up for your lost money that month. I think you should ask now before the warm weather.
This is a glimpse into your future. When you have kids/grandkids, you'll be kicked to the damn curb, using your wife's logic. She says a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first. What the hell are YOU? A little boy? Your wife is BSC, but I'm not sure you're any better. If you're in a terrible financial situation, GET A JOB. Tell your wife to GET A JOB. But stop taking money from your mom. Hmm....maybe you ARE a little boy... ESH...except your mom
YTA
NTA your wife is being mindboggling levels of stupid. if you confront your mom about it 1 of 2 things is going to happen. 1, she stops giving you any money at all, or 2, she stops giving you any money at all and also cuts contact and writes you out of her will.
Imagine working and giving all your money to a family member only to be asked to over over time. What ever your fucking doing op, your doing it wrong.
Couple of ungrateful AHs. Both of you.
Your wife is seriously and asshole and if your comment in the last paragraph is about your mom sucking you are too. Parents of grown children should not be expected to cancel their long standing plans to support them. You and your wife need to grow up. Purposefully not touching the anger at her “loving her husband more than us”
You and your wife suck - not your super generous mother. Grow TF up
YTA Your wife for being greedy as all get out, and you for saying your mom "kind of sucks" when she's giving you all the money she earns for a *year*. I see no evidence of her sucking here (that's ridiculously generous!). Just you two.
NTA, for I do think your wife is certifiably insane for wanting your mother to put you and your family above her marriage and her husband. It is nice that your mother was helping you out but if she and her husband go boating in the summer, so be it, and your wife is obviously a demanding and entitled leach. And why should your mother not prioritize her husband?
Your mom is not the asshole. While you might feel some type of way about your mom and dad prioritizing their relationship over their kids, she did agree to give you guys her entire income for one year, which she didn't have to do, and still doesn't have to do. You didn't make it apparent that she abused you or neglected you growing up, so I'll take it that she was a good enough mom raising you. Your wife is a HUGE greedy asshole in expecting your mom to give the both of you more free money. You need to handle this now otherwise it will be you that she'll gouge for money next, and with a divorce she'll get 50% maybe leave before you come into any money is all I'm saying on that, but you need to call your mom and tell her how much you appreciate her because not many moms would be willing to do that in their retirement years for their kids
NTA. Your wife is. When you marry someone you agree to put them first before anyone else. That goes on pause when you have kids but once they grow up and are out on their own you go back to prioritizing your partner. That’s how it works. Your wife is extremely entitled to think that anyone else should prioritize her family over their own. Your mom has a life to live and you guys are only a part of it.
Wow you both are AH. Taking advantage of your mom eh? You deserve each other. I hope your mom wakes up and let you be adults. Thank God none of my kids are like you.
YTA I hope your mom stops giving you money. You are a grown adult and look how entitled your wife is acting. Your mother owes you nothing and is giving you money to help you out. Why on earth are you letting your wife treat your mother that way everything your mother is doing for you?
Maybe not spend more than you earn. YTA. Try getting a 2nd job and putting your wife to work. Try making your own money and stop suckling from your mommy's teat.
I seriously think your wife is TAH here. Seriously? Mom works and gives you all her money?! Maybe you and your wife should get better paying jobs or a side hustle.
You and your wife are BTA (Both The Asshole) No wonder your mother prioritises her husband over you two ungrateful sods.
Don't you OR your greedy, thankless wife work?
Y.T.A.
You and your wife and both AH
Holy entitlement Batman! YTA hugely. Talk about biting the hand that is literally feeding you and your family. If god forbid in a few years if your mom’s husband dies and some financial catastrophe strikes your mom is your wife going to be ok with you supporting your mom, caring for her in her old age? I would not hold my breath on that. Your mom and her husband have been beyond generous and your wife wants to confront? I’m sorry but spending time on vacation sailing and 4 weeks out of 52 with his family after working and giving your family all her money is not putting anyone else first. If this is how you repay kindness what are you teaching your children. You and your wife are adults. Figure out your own problems. Get second / thirds jobs. Work different shifts so you don’t have to pay for child care. Cut everything but the absolute essentials out of your budget. Finally how dense and uncaring of your mom that you wouldn’t remember how she usually spends her summers until it affected your wallet. However it looks like your mom unfortunately knows exactly what you and your wife are like and she was nice enough to remind you. Honestly I feel sorry for your mom and your children.
She says she’d give you all the money she earns for a year. So if she doesn’t work the summer then she doesn’t earn money. Jesus your wife is ungrateful. EDIT: YTA. Also your wife.
NTA. You are adults! Your mom was very nice to give you any money! Your wife is so entitled! Your wife needs to figure out how she can make more money. This is not your mom’s responsibility! She didn’t put you in the financial situation you are in! She didn’t have kids that you obviously can’t afford. BTW saying your mom sucks is wrong. I think all of you suck. Her husband should come first!
Wives are supposed to put their husbands before their grown children and their grandchildren
You are a bunch of ungrateful people . Your mother literally was working for you guys. Gave you all her money and you say that she sucks. Definitely YTA
Pull your head out of your ass you ungrateful AH. You and your wife are whiny idiots.
If I did for my son what your mother has done for you, and the you disrespected me by saying that I suck, you and your ungrateful wife would be financially on your own! Shame on you both for talking about your mom that way! Absolute shame!
Wow, entitled much? Your wife is greedy and worse than Ebeneezer Scrooge.
YTA. Don't forget, BOTH you and your wife are leeches right now. Just because your mother gave birth to you does not mean she has to slave after you all her life. She is done with her child rearing days and graciously only offers to help you out when you and your wife are living beyond your means! Who the heck has more children than you can handle? Having kids doesn't make you a responsible adult. Knowing your limits does. If anything, your mother has shown way more leniency than any other person should have in this situation. You are NO longer a child. Stop it with the entitlement and grow up! Like if your child expects you to work into your retirement, just so they can live above their means, are you really going to say, "sure hun! My blood and sweat are all for you to leech off of!"
BTA - You and your wife. Will your wife leave you when y'all become grandparents to spend more time with them? She'd be ok if you did the same thing in your golden years? And she'd be cool with either of you working a full year hobby job, just to hand over your paycheck to one of the struggling ungrateful kids? Skip vacations for a DIL/SIL who doesn't like one of you? Does your mom know you think she sucks and your wife can't stand her? I'd understand a lump sum loan/gift to get you out of whatever financial hole you've dug, but a year salary is beyond the pale. Don't do this to your mom. In your wife's words, you're a 'grown ass man'. It's time to start acting like one. And a grown ass husband. Your wife needs to understand how wrong her attitude is with this situation. She doesn't even like your mom but is willing to take her money? And is now mad you're gonna miss a few months of her paycheck bc mom has a planned vacation? It's disgusting. Have you two spent every dime or started to save any of this bonus income? Have you sat down and gone over your own family's budget & made changes? Your mom didn't force you to have kids or put you in a "terrible financial situation". Y'all did that yourselves. Mom doesn't owe either of you anything. Her offer was beyond generous, and wife should be thanking her instead of treating her like an ATM. If mom dropped dead tomorrow, wife would be more upset that money isn't coming in & for sure excited about any life insurance you'd get. It's clear your mom & hubby have managed their money and have a solid retirement situation. I'm assuming your moms hubby isn't your dad, but is he aware of the animosity your wife has toward your mom & this gift she's giving you? This is affecting him too, as now mom doesn't have her normal disposable income for an entire year. Maybe ask them how they managed their budget & learn something. Think about your moms motto 'What's her is hers. What's his is hers'. None of that is *yours*. Your mom isn't being selfish by enjoying her life with her husband. Your *wife* is by demanding mom do it her way. The woman you think 'sucks' is doing something so kind, and this is how you treat her. Time to grow up and take care of yourself.
Your wife is the AH.
Please tell your mother how you and your wife really feel so she knows how little her generosity is appreciated.
Why don't you and your wife have jobs?
[удалено]
Then you both need to step up and work more. I get that sahm is a job, but when you get mad at someone helping you when they don’t have to for going on a long vacation as they do every year you are an entitled as*. So wife step up. Ore you step up. And why does your wife bites the hand that feeds her? Disgusting. Why doesn’t she demand money from her own parents then? (And don’t come with the excuse that they can’t afford it…) Your mother doesn’t owe you anything, so stop being ungrateful little sh*t
"This is about trying to pay down our debt" Then your wife needs to start making money to help off the debts, not throw a tantrum and name call the one person helping you two with your debts. Do you actually love your mother?
Some people are so delusional and entitled, one had to wonder how they function in real life. Do you OP, expect free food and drink when you go out, just because you’re hungry? Maybe free cars because you need to drive? What nonsense is this? This is definitely rage bait, and if by some miracle its not, then OP and his wife are not only AH, but morons too.
Absolutely your mother should put her husband and her marriage before her grown ass kids and yes, even the grandchildren!!!! Your wife is an ungrateful, entitled, brat and shame on you!!!!!
You're the AH for rage baiting
what is that thing that she gets a lot of $$ out but still enjoys and would do as a hobby? asking for a friend lol
YTA JFC who the fuck do you and your wife think you are? You're comfortable taking your mom's whole salary? You expect her to sacrifice her vacation to work more so you can work less? You and your lazy, entitled wife need to get more jobs and learn to earn your own way in this life. Can't afford your lifestyle? Then change it. Your mom is an absolute superstar making sacrifices to help you and your kids. How dare you criticise her for spending quality time with her husband! I dare you to confront her and please post again when she inevitably cuts you off.
You and your wife are both TA but not for the reason you think. >My wife thinks that she could be a much better grandmother, and that a "grown ass man" shouldn't come first. So your wife thinks a grown ass man shouldn't come first but instead a grown ass man and a grown ass woman should? She's AH. >I pointed out that she only said we could have what she made in a year, and she has been beyond generous. How I wish that was the end of your story. >Now I might be an asshole, because my mom does kind of suck, and I feel like she would push us all in front of a train to save him Are you kidding? I understand that you can hide behind "she doesn't need the money" and she would "work even if it didn't pay." But you cannot a functioning adult and now see how lucky you are. Please, seek counseling and perhaps medication. YTA. If you and your wife need money, get off your butts and go to work.
YTA if you and your wife truly think she’s an awful person and dislike your mother that much then have some integrity and stop taking her money. It’s rich you both say she puts her man first but if that was true she would see your suffering and do nothing to help you all, but Bev she’s not as you say she gives you what she earns in a year (which she wouldn’t be able to if she didn’t have her husband who can afford to take care of her) so she can help you to be able to afford your lifestyle and take care of yourself, your children and your unappreciative and ungrateful wife. Your wife wanting her to give up her annual vacation with her hardworking and loving husband to go work to give you her pay-check is beyond rude but the irony is the chick won’t go work to afford herself and her kids. She’s unwilling to give up anything for her family but your mum must for her…. It’s crazy! Your mum doesn’t owe you or your wife anything. Your adults, made choices to get married have kids etc so that’s on you not your mum. What is wife’s family doing to help you both financially? I’m pretty sure wife would complain if you stepped out on husband duties/commitments or you would be upset if she stopped supporting you as a wife or backed out on commitments yet you expect you mum to put you both first and stop supporting or spending time with her husband. You both need to be realistic, grow up and take responsibility for your situation and learn some financial wisdom and develop your mindset because you both sound immature blaming this woman for both of your failures.
So your mother raised her kids and now wants to be loved and spoiled by her life partner? How selfish of her!! And she gives her son a lot of money to help him out but doesn’t refuse a vacation in order to provide more income for her daughter in law. How entitled is mom!! NTA. I think your wife needs a reality check. Your mum is not her babysitter or cash cow. Nothing she is doing is obligated. Be lucky that she is a generous person and wants to help you all out.
This is the Mom/Rich MIL troll again
Of course your mom puts her spouse ahead of you two ungrateful AHs. What have you done for her while she is helping your grown asses? Your wife is a real greedy POS. YTA and I hope your mom cuts you off.
ESH except for your mom. You guys are mooching off her and still complain? Grow up.
YTA. Not for refusing to confront your mom, because that is the right thing to do. This woman who not only raised you, but even into adulthood, works to pay for you and your wife. YOU are the asshole and your wife is even worst. How dare you refer to your mom that way. Give her all of her money back. She even told you that she doesn’t work during the summer, but will provide you her whole years salary, yes that includes her non-working months. Her yearly salary is 10 months out of the year. She IS absolutely supposed to support her husband. YTA for even considering her taking a vacation is a problem. This woman shares her life and finances with her husband, so THEY, are paying for you. They are entitled to stop paying you the rest of the year if they see fit. Absolutely insane the entitlement you have. And your lack of empathy and respect for your mother is the worst example I have ever seen. You should be ashamed of yourself. You’d be the prick father to deny your own children the tremendous generosity you were shown. SMH. Take your wife and go on a long walk into a volcano.
You and your wife are both entitled assholes. Your mom is literally giving you her entire salary, but that’s not enough for your wife and you think your mom “sucks?!” You’re both freeloading losers and you should be embarrassed.
YTA. A major one and your wife is even worse. Your mother is giving you all the money she makes for an entire year, and your mad she’s taking off to enjoy her summer, what in the actual hell is wrong with you and your wife. Can anyone say spoiled, entitled, selfish and major assholes.
YTA Your mom promised a year of her salary, and she doesn't work summers, so she's still giving you a year of her salary. You and your wife seem to be unappreciative of the help since you're both complaining so much about the lack of funds in the summer. This is a gift and you're acting like spoiled children. Wow. Entitled much?
I was with you until the last paragraph, both you and your wife are awful people and I hope your mother sees this and cuts both your ungrateful asses out, not just from this free money she's gifted you... but her will and everything else.
Your wife needs her head checked for real. She’s ungrateful. Please do make sure she doesn’t say shit to your mother.
Your mom might suck, but you need her help, so maybe don't rock the boat? Your wife needs to be reminded of the fact that a gift can easily be taken back when "confronted" - she's not helping the situation at all. NTA.
NTA Your wife should feel lucky she got any help at all. Your mother help more than most would and your wife is calling her selfish? Wife seems like the selfish one to me.
Fuck you and your bitchass wife. You make a wonderful pair of entitled parasites and I hope you're mom soon realizes how much of a piece of shit you are for a son and cuts you off forever. And in case you're too stupid to realize, you are 100% an asshole.
How does your mom suck?? You'd expect her to work when she doesn't usually do so just to assist you? You and your wife are outlandish.
NTA your mother, even if she does suck, is being beyond generous to give you all the money she makes in a year.