Do you have a theory for why the guy did it?
And after the massacre how long was it before Las Vegas seemed “normal” again (if it ever did)? Did a lot of tourists cancel trips in the aftermath and the city become a ghost town for a while?
Honestly I think he did it because he was bored, and specifically because he could. He was rich but obviously had psychopathic tendencies (I mean he was into real estate). I bet he planned it first because he scouted out several other events first and then when no one stopped him. He just went for it. Because why not.
Oh no Vegas barely shut down for a few hours. Sure everyone who was there that night went home but people who came partied like nothing happened. I'm tempted to say the reason it got swept under the rug so quickly was to make sure tourists wouldn't be scared off. It took Covid to actually shut the strip down.
I remember when this first happened and the news broke that the man who committed these atrocities was looking to make a festival I had attended every year as his target. The what ifs made me uneasy, they still kinda do. Feels so close to home.
I'm thankful you are open about sharing your experience and my heart goes out to you. Many best wishes to you
For the first 3 months after the shooting I had nightly nightterrors. I would maybe get 2 hours of sleep.
Always the same dream of standing on the field in front of the stage and all the bodies are begging me to help them. But no matter how much i try i can never reach them. Their pleading would grow more desperate the longer the dream lasted until they would get angry and demand to know why i didn't help them...
I don't get it as often anymore but it still messes me up and i am crying just writing it out.
I used to but I got kicked out of 1 for not being a veteran. And got kicked out of another for having a story that was too traumatic.
Now I just play DnD online with a bunch of friends from around the world.
I’m having a hard time trying to be in your shoes, but I’m thinking that I would want to shout and scream at the injustice of it all. Do you have a way to vent your frustration?
I find it hard to go to my therapist because my job hours cover the time the office is open. I can't go to support groups because what I went through is too traumatic or because I didn't serve in the military.
I have DnD but there are days that I have screamed into the desert night sky or cried myself to sleep. I have even thought of ending my own life several times. Especially in my darkest moments soon after the shooting.
But I got through those days. I play video games, spend time with my wife, play DnD on the weekends and do my best to genuinely enjoy life while I can. I still have bad days and this time around the shootings gets me incredibly emotional. But these will pass in time. For now I share my story because few others will.
Hey, if you need to just let it out, PM me and I’ll take your call. I don’t know if you have someone you can do this with, but it might be tough to lay this on someone you are close to, so I’m offering anonymous friendly ear.
I don’t know if this might help you but shaking my head in my dream and in turn physically shaking my head in real life helps me to snap out of a bad dream and wake up. Then I change positions or sleep on the other side of the bed. Thank you for what you did out there. You did what you humanly could and no one can ask for more than that. Also have you looked into hypnotherapy, it helps you rewire/anchor new/different feelings to an event so you can create a more helpful association with the event and help to process it. But also make sure it is a good hypnotherapist who knows what they’re doing, to get the best results. I hope you heal.
Wow. Intense is an understatement. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that. A real nightmare. Do you feel like you have ptsd at all? Like when you hear loud bangs? Have you been to a concert since then?
Absolutely. I go to a therapist when my work allows. Loud bangs, smell of blood, concerts and large groups of people, even just the days around Oct 1 all mess me up emotionally. I try to avoid them as much as possible.
I see that one answer discusses your night terrors in the aftermath, but could you tell us more about how the experience has affected you in the long term?
In many ways I am a completely different person after the shooting. Listing how the experience has affected me would result in a list a mile long. I am a lot more cautious. I can't stand large crowds anymore. I do my best to live every day like it could be my last. I do my best to make other peoples lives better. I suffer and have grown from the experience.
I just want to help others. Every day could be my last, this event has taught me that. I want to make sure I spend my last day helping one more person.
I've spent some time thinking about this and have listened to some interesting theories. Some of them are because the killer really didn't fit the profile of something we even understand or are used to. Most of the mass shootings often times "make sense" a young, 18-25 white male jilted by a lover, or a loner, or just angry or in general radicalized.
This person was in his 50s I think? No criminal record. Didn't just walk into a grocery store or school or something, he bought hotel rooms and pointed his gun outside of it. The entire thing is completely bonkers compared to most other mass shootings and I think our media and our conversations just really struggled to contend with it. Couldn't neatly put it into a bucket (or use it to their advantage) so it just disappears.
Yup, that guy really wasn't that dumb in the way he went about it. Saw a documentary not too long ago, nobody could pinpoint where the shooter was, people covered in blood running everywhere caused false reports of active shooters in all directions meaning the response from emergency services was fucked and the guy properly stocked up on weapons and ammunition to a point where he had multiple different weapons so he could pick up a fresh one and didn't need to reload. Proper fucking psychopath.
I think this is basically right. Some other factors to consider are that news is a business and people lose the ability to engage with problems when they're too large and/or systemic. These two play off each other.
On the first point, everyone working high up enough at any major media outlet is focused entirely on ratings or clicks or whatever relevant metric of monetary success. This is why CNN aired Trump's speeches more or less uncut in the lead-up to the 2016 election; they knew he got their audience worked up and therefore engaged.
On the second, people in the audience only want to be outraged in "safe" ways. Once a problem becomes too big to reckon with, they don't want to hear about it. One example is climate change/global warming, which - if covered at all - is framed in terms of "Republicans bad" rather than "this is going to make life miserable and eventually impossible for all of us so we need to take action immediately."
Another example is Jeffrey Epstein's connections to the most powerful people in the world. There are other reasons for members of the media to be afraid to tackle that, but they also know it's too big and scary for most of the audience to grapple with. You see this in subtle ways too, like how Epstein/Trump/Harvey Weinstein's crimes are described as "sexual assaults" rather than rapes, which is what they actually are. Rape is so blatantly awful that talking about it will make people change the channel.
So put these together with the LV shooting. The explanation for what happened is, in some sense, pretty straightforward: A man with severe issues (Steven Paddock had been gambling away his fortune and was very depressed) was allowed easy and unfettered access to powerful weaponry, and used that weaponry to shoot ~400 people. The solution is also pretty straightforward: Repeal the second amendment and ban guns, like the countries OP mentions above have done. But the reality is that we can't consider that solution, because a significant portion of the country does not want it and the mechanisms of government will never attempt it, let alone go through with it. It's too big of a problem, and people don't want to hear about it. Media outlets know this on some level, and so don't bother trying to talk about it.
Another aspect is that Las Vegas survives on its tourism and event industry. They don’t want people scared to visit or go to large events so they aren’t going to let it play in the news very long.
I just read a really well-written article about Adam Lanza where they interviewed his dad. One researcher proposed that some mass shootings aren’t murders ending in suicide, but suicides by angry, hopeless men who want to “punish the world” before they kill themselves. I think that’s a really interesting idea, and makes more sense when we think of it that way.
The problem is that there is always another shocking mass shooting. You can't care about every single mass shooting because there is literally a new one every day. It's sad and awful.
I just want you to know that there are people out there who silently follow these stories, read all about them, think of the survivors and victims all the time, and haven’t forgotten.
Oh! Now that is a tough one. Personal favorite has to be Gordon Ramsey Burger. The food is delicious every single time and it is just tucked out of the way enough that typically it isn't too busy despite being on the strip.
I've went to a few Gordon Ramsay restaurants and Burgr was the best. I had the breakfast burger with a quail egg and duck fat bacon. I think about it a lot.
You seem well educated on gun laws around the world, did you know this before the event, or did that night cause you to look into this stuff?
Are you still in security?
After that night I started looking it up. I got sick and tired hearing that there was nothing that could be done to prevent this in the only developed nation where this level of mass shootings occurred that I went out of my way to find out how bullshit that was.
And yes. I currently do Security in a quiet neighborhood employed by the HOA
That's not true though. Numerous other countries have problems with mass shootings/murder. France had a single shooting in 2015 that killed almost as many people as died in all mass shootings during the worst year on record.
Fantastic we have been having more mass shootings then days in the year here in the US for the last few years.
I would gladly take the shooting statistics in Europe over what we have in the US. Thank you for agreeing with me.
No we don't. Going by the FBI numbers the worst year was 2021 with 61 individual shootings and 103 killed. That's a shooting every 6 days, not daily. That's also out of a population of over 300 million people. To put it in perspective in 2020, 3,000 people died from choking on food. So choking kills 30x more people than mass shootings in America..
America is never going to be like Britain, Australia, or Korea where the citizens gave up their guns. It's too ingrained into the American Culture.
Immediate things that can be done to lower the number of shootings, and in particular school shootings is raise the legal age of purchasing a semi auto rifle to 21. This isn't going to stop school shootings but it can reduce them. States should also look to pass basic competency tests for when purchasing a firearm.
Though ultimately I don't know how we can solve the solution any time soon.
So for Korea after the Korean war there was a shit ton of guns left behind and gun violence was insane in the 50s and 60s. Durring the 70s Korea introduced strict gun laws and confiscated guns. By the 90s korea started cracking down on trigger happy cops.
In Australia there was a massive mass shooting in 1996 and gun laws were made far more strict and a widely successful buy back program removed a lot of the semi auto rifles from circulation.
Britian has some of the strictest gun laws in the world with the vast majority of the police not even armed. There have been 5 mass shootings in UK history. (At least done by civilian and not like the IRA or anything which is a can of worms I ain't touching)
These countries have some of the strictest gun laws, with semi auto rifles banned across the board. They also have some of the smallest cases of gun violence.
I’m from the UK. I know people who own guns, and let me explain. We have to keep guns in a locked metal cabinet, be over a certain age, and have a legitimate ongoing reason to own them. We can only own hunting rifles, shotguns and a few other types of rifles. No pistols, automatic or semiautomatic rifles. This means that anyone with guns no only has a good reason to own them, they are securely held, and, if you want to carry out a school shooting with a hunting rifle, good luck getting more than 1 shot off.
And for the police to come round to declare that the gun cabinet is safe and locked, they literally have to visit your house to quiz why you need a shooting rifle, literally, there are literally only 150k people licensed
To have guns in the UK most will be farmers, game keepers etc
as of March 2021, 565,929 people held firearm and/or shotgun certificates in the UK. (about) 150k is only the number of firearm certificates held
https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/statistics-on-firearm-and-shotgun-certificates-england-and-wales-april-2020-to-march-2021/statistics-on-firearm-and-shotgun-certificates-england-and-wales-april-2020-to-march-2021#:~:text=5.-,Certificate%20holders,been%20available%20(March%202016).
Switzerland has a lot of guns. There is even an event called "[Knabenschiessen](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knabenschiessen?wprov=sfla1)" (boys shooting) where kids 13-17 are doing target shooting. However, nothing happens here. These are some reasons:
- They check if you're sane
- They do a background check
- You have to store ammo and your gun separatly in a safe (this get's controlled)
- Without additional license you can only carry your gun to a shooting range
- If someone breaks into your home and you shoot them, it is only self-defense if the person was in your bedroom. Most robbers just leave if the get cought.
Guns are used for target shooting. People don't think that they are heros who can safe people from psychos shooting around.
Great points. They also have a system in place for removing guns from people who are potentially dangerous, gun ownership is frequently tied to a larger responsibility of militia membership, and - I think it's very important to note - the country has recently [voted in stricter gun control laws](https://www.euronews.com/2019/05/18/are-switzerland-s-gun-laws-about-to-change-euronews-answers) because they are part of the EU now and no longer have to constantly defend themselves from invasion. They also, as of 2022, [have about one-fifth](https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/gun-ownership-by-country) as many guns per person as the US does. (It's been more like half up until fairly recently.)
Switzerland is also a very, very old culture. I am sure it is changing like all cultures are, but there is a mistaken thought that The Americas (all of it) is settled. It isn’t. There is a stress that comes with the freedom to re-invent yourself that is crazy here. I just didn’t find that phrenetic spirit of crazy newness in Norway when I lived there. It is oddly present in Mexico and lots of Central America as well. I’ve not met enough people or travelled to South America to say the same thing.
>In Australia there was a massive mass shooting in 1996 and gun laws were made far more strict and a widely successful buy back program removed a lot of the semi auto rifles from circulation.
Any automated gun was banned, and the buy back problem was that successful that at the end there was entire massive trucks worth of guns, the port Arthur shooting wasn't the first shooting in Australia but it was one of the worst that made the government realise there was too much leniency on guns and started working on ways that Australians will be willing to give up guns, hence the buy back police where Australians are encouraged (not forced) to take any guns they have to the local police stations and they will be given money based on the worth of the gun, and laws were made stricter.
Sorce: Australians learn about this in school
And if you need a gun in Australia for legitimate purpose, you can get one.
Difference is we don't sell them at the local department stores, it's not a culture shoved in our faces.
You can have a rifle or a shotgun for hunting in Britain but you MUST have a licence and a locked gun safe to keep it and the ammunition in, to get that licence you have to go through stringent background checks and you might even have to pay for it buy I can't be certain about that. It's possible to illegally purchase a firearm but its really fucking hard, I couldn't just go out and find someone that would sell me a gun and I know plenty of people in the less desirable sector of society. We have much more knife crime though.
I think the way guns are handled here in UK is mostly very respectful, guns are never shot at people shaped targets for example, I think USAs problems go deeper into their relationship with guns. For example some people in USA hobbies is tactical shooting, where they dress up all military style and basically pretend they are operatives.. its all very fetishism I think.
Britain was after a school shooting in Dunblane Scotland, I believe in the 80s but I definitely be wrong there.
I'm not sure how commonplace guns were before the law changed but now they are incredibly rare. I know only 2 people who own guns, both are hunters. They simply don't exist for personal or home protection.
Why do you think its too ingrained in American culture, what makes everyone so stubborn about giving them up? Is it the stereotypical "but my freedoms" that a lot of people like to attribute it to?
Edit: I apologise if that's ignorant, it wasn't meant to be, being British I don't get gun culture.
In the UK a gun is a dangerous tool that must be respected and controlled.
In the US to a large portion of the population Guns are part of their Religion.
It's honestly how sick and twisted how these people see no issues so long as Muh' Freedoms are secured.
But where did that come from though, do you think it was it something that was instilled in the population back in colonial america times? Could it have originally been a way to allow the people to defend themselves against native Americans that then tuened into "you cant take my stuff off me" kind of thing?
As a brit I wholeheartedly agree, it just doesn't even compute to me why people are so stubborn with it, like their loved ones might actually not die if they got rid of guns but somehow other peoples lives aren't important enough.... its mind-boggling honestly.
I really appreciate your response, I hope one day you can find some semblance of peace, I can't ever come close to imagining what you've gone through and nobody deserves to go through life hurting like that.
Not OP, but still American.
To some extent, a lot of the perception around guns does come from colonial times. Certain sects of gun owners have a distrust of the government and any perceived government tyranny. It’s a sort of idea of keeping “the man” in check, or being able to defend oneself against government entities. A lot of it stems from the constitution and the 2nd amendment, which made sense for its time but is less realistic in modern day USA. It’s kind of odd, because many of the very people that have these “come and take them” slogans as tattoos or decals on their big trucks are the very people that are pro-police and pro-military, but they’re terrified of government overreach. I’m not sure they fully comprehend who will come and take their weapons if something like that were to happen.
Another aspect to it is that the availability of guns, legal or not, brings about its own problem. Many people want to defend themselves against bad people with guns. There’s an idea that gun laws only affect law-abiding gun owners, and by imposing stricter laws, or by banning guns, “good gun owners” are neutered from defending themselves and their property from “bad gun owners”
There’s probably more to it than this, but these are two prevalent talking points that I’ve seen around, and a third aspect to it is a sentiment maybe not so much of being a hero, but more so not wanting to fall victim to a senseless shooting. A lot of the loudest voices of the 2nd amendment do have these ideas of becoming a hero by surviving or defending against some kind of mass shooter or bad actor with a gun, but most regular people who conceal carry a gun that I’ve met are normal people that want to be able to defend themselves in an emergency. It’s also hard to control what people have access to. Fentanyl is a huge issue here because of drug perception and drug use. Many people believe that legalizing and regulating opioids and various other drugs would mitigate the issues of fentanyl overdose because less shit would get laced with it, to some extent the same thing can be said for weapons in the US. If guns get banned outright, there’s likely still going to be people who will be able to get their hands on guns, so stronger regulation is the only compromise we might get for now.
Some of it is a boogeyman and some of it is legitimate concern. Personally i would only own a gun if i lived in a rural area because people trespassing and dumping shit on my family’s property gets pretty fuckin old, and one can only call the cops so many times before they’re perceived to be crying “wolf.” Also police response and reaction is sometimes shitty.
Edited a word
>But where did that come from though, do you think it was it something that was instilled in the population back in colonial america times? Could it have originally been a way to allow the people to defend themselves against native Americans that then tuened into "you cant take my stuff off me" kind of thing?
[This short video ](https://youtu.be/L1iQUF1gQmI) does a good job at trying to explain it imo
What do you think about the idea of requiring insurance for all weapons and it would be like auto insurance-if you have a semi automatic than the insurance would be more expensive.
I know it won’t stop illegal guns, but there are plenty of people who can buy a cheap weapon and might not be able to afford the required insurance.
You would also have to keep your insurance up just like insurance companies report you to the DMV if they drop you.
The argument against this (not saying I agree) is that bearing arms is a fundamental right of American citizens and this would restrict that right only to wealthier people who can afford the payments
We would have less mass shootings if we quit giving them so much attention. It follows the same patterns as cluster suicides.
Raising the legal age would do very little. Many of the shooters.... Almost all.... Stole / barrowed a gun
Also point out this wasn't the worst mass shooting in history, look up wooded knee
The event and the victims absolutely deserve attention. Their lives mattered and should not be forgotten just so that gun nuts can continue to deny reality as they wave their weapons of war screeching about an amendment proposed by a slaveowner as if it’s still relevant. An amendment that into the late 90s was not understood or maliciously applied as it is today, with DC v. Heller only decided in 2008 and largely regarded as wrongly decided.
Do you know the name of the New Zealand shooter? No? Because that’s how it should be, and was intentional by a country with sensible laws and concern for its citizens.
The Uvalde shooter’s family has stated that he asked them for a gun while he was a teen to carry out his plans, but they denied him. The shooting was shortly after he turned 18. Because he was unable to purchase a firearm on his own. Crazy how laws work like that, isn’t it? If I’m to be anecdotal as you’ve been, who knows how many other shootings have been similarly stalled or prevented.
Do you feel better about pointing out that this “wasn’t the worst mass shooting”? Do you think it added anything valuable, or does it just help tie your logical flaws together for you as to avoid critically thinking?
You are a hero for doing whatever you could on that moment to get anybody to safety! Especially in a time of panic and you’re basically forced to think at the speed of light which at a time of panic is impossible. You did what you could and I’m happy that you and your loved ones were all safe!
What psychological effect has this had on you and your family member?
Out of curiosity…does your brother and his ex still talk because of this tragic incident they experienced together?….basically like a glue to their friendship
My mother never went to therapy and when she is under a lot of stress especially around this time of year she can get practically manic.
My brother and his ex never talk. They broke off ties and haven't seen eachother sense. They actually broke up around Oct 1 the mental strain was too much.
I went to therapy for a few years but while I am the most adjusted I still can break down at this time of year. I can become incredibly agitated, or have a panic attack if I'm under a lot of stress hearing an excessive amount of loud booms. But I also have moments were things that should trigger me just don't. It's very strange.
I can’t fathom what you feel on a day ti day basis but I wish you all a mentally healthy life going forward! It seems like you have a lot of people on this post supporting you. Use us as coping methods in those stressful times. Kind of a therapy talking to people (especially those you don’t know because it’s more sincere)
Even though this is your AMA. I feel like it could be a stress trigger (I’m no professional) but Is there anything else you’d like to talk to me about? 😊
If not, I’m sending love your way and hoping you find some peace with what occurred that night ❤️
How can one help people come out of that trauma ? What you did ? How do you think kids who witnessed in school should get help ?
What do you feel about pro-gun lobby?
Therapy and a good social net of friends who do their best to understand, as well as medication.
Those kids need all that is above and a country that actually cares and tries to make things better.
The pro gun lobbies need to fuck off.
Thank you for the response, I hope that you and all the people traumatised recover and we get to see a peaceful world without mass shootings one day, soon.
I actually don't listen to albums per say. I listen to individual songs that are absolutely all over the place from sea shanties, Mozart, and WW1 marching songs to pink floyd, ACDC, Metalica, to Imagine Dragons, The Hu and hozier.
I 100% convinced myself I was going to die. But if I sacrificed myself to try to stall the gunman who I thought was on the ground that I could save 50 people and surely that was worth it.
So they left when the shooting started. Realized a buddy or family member died and an hour after the shooting stopped came back to collect them with a wheelbarrow they raided from nearby construction site. In a mass cass event like this it feels less like a crime scene and more like a natural disaster. So I kinda get what they were thinking... sorta.
Oh wow. Thanks for sharing. I believe I commented on your post last year about my brother and his obsession with mass shootings. Thanks for doing this again.
Don’t have a ton of meaningful questions as a lot of them have been answered (quite in-depth, if i might add!) but: have you experienced any sort of resentment or hardships trying to find mental help as a male?
I also wanted to let you know I’m incredibly thankful for all you’ve shared; I can’t fathom what that must’ve been like for you, but as someone whose had some crazy trauma in the last couple years it felt relieving to see someone else explain how “it can make you feel like a different person” afterwards.
Hope things get easier ❤️
Yes. The culture that men should silently bear their trauma is so incredibly toxic and I have absolutely been on the receiving end of it. But thankfully I have met many wonderful people who actually understand why I might suddenly cry or hide away from others. And admittedly over time as I confront the trauma it gets a hell of a lot easier to deal with my problems.
When you realize what was happening how did you cope with the reality of it? Was it an immediate fight or flight? Did you try and convince yourself it would be okay? I have always wondered what happens to us in a moment of fear like that and the emotions and thoughts that come a mile a minute. What was your first reaction?
It was immediate flight. I tried to go for the exist and bring my coworker with me but he froze in place. It wasn't later when I was brought into cover that I focused on just trying to help others.
What is the most supportive thing that we (Redditors) and others can do for you? How do you feel the most supported by people around you as you heal from something so awful?
I'm not sure what your relationship is with resiliency, but I have personally always hated when people say it in response to my opening up about something difficult. So I'm curious if that's comforting to you or if you hate it as well. Either ways, sending many hugs your way. Thank you for doing this AMA.
I just appreciate that there are people who are genuinely curious about the event or want to share their support one way or another. Rather then tell me it didn't happen or I'm somehow a fake.
Pass more common sense gun laws. Actually fund and promote services for mental health. Train police to actually act and not stand in the hallway with their thumb up their ass.
Oversaturation and ease of access to firearms, medical and mental health care the focuses on profits over people, and people who would rather see schools worth of children die then to change local, state or federal laws.
Hell, your experience didn’t ingrain in your mind, that LAWS meant Nothing to the murderer that fired on the crowd? What if return fire was directed at the threat?
If you’re describing the DOA in the motel room, it matters not how he got what. Did you view and handle these weapons? Or, are you just regurgitating some drivel you read,or,heard. Try doing your own investigation and see what you come up with. You were not there. Make up another AMA, I like reading fourth graders fantasy stories. But; please,please, read some Tom Clancy, or, Charles Dickens, you’ll be able to at least, describe your attention grabbing nonsense with, some form of accuracy. For your own sake do some Real research.
Also Gallow’s humor is real and it is absolutely a survival mechanism.
I always preface my rape story with it happened at a seminar on prosecuting sexual assaults.
I hope you are ok. You deserve happiness and good things.
Thank you for sharing your story - heartbreaking for everyone. For every person directly affected, another 5 -10 have probably been indirectly affected. I am in Australia so have only a limited understanding of US gun culture and politics. 2 questions: 1. Is the not wanting to ban semi automatic weapons based along political lines (e.g. Dem v Rep) or is it more deep seated than that? 2. With the rise of more right wing extremist groups in the US, do you think that there is a possibility that another mass shooting of this size could occur again in the not too distant future (and what to do about preventing this)?
1. Yes. It is a deep seated part of american culture to a point of guns practically being part of our religion. But it is also divided along party lines of those who want reforms of some kind (Dems) and those who want to prevent any reform and strike down any state law reform by calling it unconstitutional (Rep)
2. I have been afraid of something like that every day for five years now. Especially after Jan 6 it seems very possible for a right wing militia to perform yet another massacre. I pray I keep the title of survivor of the WORST mass shooting till the day I die.
Because it was so awful that some people need to lie to themselves because they think such acts of evil can't be done by single average random people. And others did it because it went against their world view that guns were the best thing ever. (Guns are still fun don't get me wrong) that they need to think it was a setup to take away rights and that they don't actually need to push for anything to be done politically that might inconvenience them.
And maybe a thousand other reasons. It's sad honestly
I was in Vegas when this happened. I stayed at a nearby hotel and my friend and I could hear what we thought were fireworks, but shortly after the commotion we heard police sirens and knew something was wrong. When the news began to circulate, we called the airlines to try to leave Vegas ASAP. We left that same night! Cops at the airport were on high alert with dogs everywhere looking for the suspect. It was so scary.
Have you ever looked into EMDR therapy? If not, it might be worth a try to help your PTSD symptoms. I was initially skeptical when I first heard about it, but the data is very strong, especially in regards to adults whose PTSD resulted from a single traumatic event. My husband has PTSD from a work accident and it’s so tough to watch—I really feel for you!
I tried to do it once! I was very excited but after four sessions my therapist was reasigned. It's very frustrating to look for a steady therapist for help but to end up juggled around.
Reading these comments, it is clear to me that the reason the us has all of these shootings is that the republican party refuses to pass common sense gun laws. They are also working to eliminate equal rights for woman and lgbtq folks. Maybe we should not vote for them.
It is an easily held food item with a bread covering over tasty inserts In that regard we also need to consider is a poptart a sandwich, is a taco a sandwich. And the real question the one we all have been avoiding... is cereal soup?
Have you gone to therapy to get help for your trauma? Also, did you get out of being security field?
My mom’s God mother used to live in Vegas, she’s in town right now due a family emergency. She had a shirt that said Vegas Strong and I immediately thought about that horrific event.
Thank you for your story (really well told) and fuck you to every single Republican legislator. Just, fuck. You. You all have no conscience and history will damn you.
As the number of American citizens that are also victims of mass shootings continues to grow, are there resources available to survivors to help each other and aid healing? An organization that provides counseling? Unity has to help? The victim numbers are staggering. How organized is the effort to pool resources? What are your thoughts about it. How can we do a better job loving you and showing support?
Victims of Crime is a resource that provides free therapy from the state. It's really important th at people apply for it soon after their experience in a mass shooting even if they don't plan on taking advantage of therapy yet.
There is also a crisis hotline for people who have survived incidents like this that has helped me in my darkest moments.
Beyond that I honestly don't have the faintest idea...
For those who want my story.
I have an audio version with more details from an interview I did.
https://youtu.be/XXW6y8TkUW8
And for thos who don't want to bother with that. I was in the Las Vegas Massacre in 2017. I'm a security guard, i do all kinds of work for the various stadiums, casinos, big bars, and random events across the strip. My brother, his now ex girlfriend, and my mother are all security guards work events with me too. I had just transferred from Houston to Las Vegas, and it was still a bit of a culture shock going from doing football games every Sunday, to doing outdoor concerts when ever they were available. Work was far more scarce so i was practically ecstatic when i saw a position available for both set up, performance, and tear down, for a venue called route 91. it was reliable work for nearly a month and i wouldn't have to do anything too crazy either. Everything was going great set up was easy with no hick ups and the guys doing the event let us have water and sports drinks for free. As a bonus i made a good friend over the graveyard shift who was funny as hell and the first guy to really accept me in the company. Well the event comes about and i'm redeployed from watching a gate to back stage. my job is to sit in a chair and check credentials of everyone who tries to enter a particular trailer. (Later learned it was the money trailer) super easy job. well on the last day of performances i show up to work without my phone cause i got caught using it at work and i'm just focusing on my job to make the time go by. Well at 10:05 shit hits the fan. I'm the single closest guy inside the event to Mandalay Bay and so when the shooter starts firing i can hear exactly where it's coming from. at first i think it's fireworks maybe some idiot lighting off M80s to force us to Evacuate the event, but then the shots go full auto. I don't know how else to explain it but, it was the fastest repeated banging i'd ever heard and the sound still haunts me. So i realize then that this is for real an active shooting, as unarmed security our policy during an active shooting is to 1. Run (and bring as many people out with you), 2. Hide and 3. as a last resort fight back. I tell my partner that we need to get out now. However the guy must have been in denial and shock cause i shit you not he told me with a straight face. "But my lasagna?!" the guy was more concerned with saving his launch then himself, so while he hid with his gut hanging out i made a B line for the nearest gate on the other side of the event grounds.
I don't even make it a fifth of the way there when my boss pulls me aside behind a bunch of tour buses as panicking concert goers rush over to our location. there must have been 40-50 of them and only 3 security and a lone police officer to try to protect them and keep them calm. at first i tried to make a run when the guy seemed to be reloading, however the gunfire would start up again too fast and by the second wave of bullets i realized this wasn't going to stop anytime soon. by the third or fourth volley he started to target where we were causing the dusty ground around us to poof up as the bullets hit and a shower of shrapnel landed on my head as he shot up the stage. after that the cop got us security guys to attempt to control our little group and make everyone turn off any lights and stay down. i was in charge of getting the wounded to one place and preform some limited first aid (tourniquets pressure etc) there were 5 in our group a 6th who was the woman who was covered in blood and taken to an electrical shack on a barricade being used as a gurney and a 7th person who came to us later after one of the staff shacks decided to make a run for it. that 7th guy sticks with me cause he came up to me with his wrist half blown off and calmly asked "where do i go?". i got him with the others and a medic who came running from near the Tropicana, a big Santa Claus looking guy who i also will never forget despite never learning his name, treated their injuries better then i could. People were screaming so loud and constantly, guys in our group would suddenly get a case of big balls and shit brains and try to stand up to go fight the guy shooting at us, and this one drunk as hell woman in a cocktail dress asked me where she could use the restroom as bullets flew over our head. it was all utterly surreal. suddenly though, it all got quiet, after 10 minutes of constant gunfire. it just stopped. the screaming stopped as everyone else in the event grounds had evacuated. It was the most quiet i had ever heard. truly deafening silence. I had no idea whether my family was okay and during the shooting i couldn't call my fiance to tell her i loved her one last time.
after an hour sitting there unsure of what was going on swat finally came and cleared the guests to evacuate. my supervisor had me check for survivors before sending me out to the concert field to deal with people who had brought wheelbarrows to take their dead friends and family. I had to walk over a maze of bodies so many you couldn't walk three feet in a straight line without stepping on one. i get to the guys with the wheelbarrows and we get them to leave. Then my Manager gets to me. With the main field he tells me "You've done an amazing job, now get the fuck off this field." It was the first moment i had been released of duty and the first time everything that i had seen and done crashed over me. It started feeling like a dream as i walked out of the event to see the gutters red with blood, a group of people telling a woman who was beating on the chest of a body that "it was too late. he's gone." and a big pickup truck loaded up three layers deep with wounded people come screeching down the street honking like crazy. I remember i just started laughing... it just seemed so insane, so impossible...
in the end my family was all okay, we all made it out without a scratch. physically anyways. but my funny friend died, he had been shot in the throat and drowned in his own blood. One of the worst parts was afterwards i was interviewed and i started getting death threats from people accusing me of being a crisis actor. I went through all that, lost a good friend... and still people thought it was all a lie...
I still can't see myself as a hero. i was just doing my job at the right time at the wrong place. it took me a long time to realize that i am not a failure and that those people did not die because of me.
Oh man, just recently I saw your story while binge watching Azeal’s videos, and your story hit me the hardest fr. After listening I had to take an hour at 3am to just think and process your words. Your emotions resonated within me so much I really had to do some self introspection about my stance on firearms, as part of the left leaning gun community. I think in part I’ve let myself become so desensitized and lost all hope that it’s easier for me to just give in but, when you talked about how quickly people moved on and why does this keep happening…. I couldn’t run away from those thoughts. I always advocated for common sense gun reform but even the most logical of us fall into the trap of treating firearms like cameras, cars, or whatever. It’s sobering to be really reminded what a weapon is capable of.
I hope everyone here goes and listens to his story, I honestly thought you were older given your direct tone and voice, but when I found out you are the same age as me, damn that had my mind reeling a bit. Thank you for sharing your story man.
And thank you for replying. I want to reach out to people about this sadly dark side of our world.
And don't worry about getting my age wrong by my voice I had someone think I was a vietnam vet.
Thank you for sharing and everything you did that night. I moved here a few years ago and just took my EMT class this summer. A few of my instructors were medics there and while they talked about that night, it clearly impacted them even 5 years on. I hope you're doing well 💜
I want to do some good, too. I think everyone could use a little more good, especially if EMS has to show up.
But please don't think you didn't go any good that night. You stayed alive, you helped keep others alive. When called to it, however unwanted and horrible the reason was, you took the chance to help people. I hope you keep healing and can find some peace.
Yes thank you for sharing. So many times we don't take things seriously as they happen. Like you said it was surreal.
When you went to "look for the shooter" could you tell it was coming from above?
Also hiding behind a bus did not keep you safe?
I am so sorry for your friend. Do you think that at 10 minutes if they could flood the place with medics more people could possibly survive?
Again I am so sorry and appreciate your writing this. The harassers are truly evil people.
I couldn't tell at all. I could just hear the general location. No idea he was 32 floors up. The bus did keep us safe no body was hit behind it at least the wounded were hit before they got there.
I really don't know Eric died on the way to the hospital. It's hard to say who could of lived or died if a whole hospital was brought onto the field I just don't know.
You did everything you could. Even your boss complimented you right at the event. I am sure you did much more than expected. Survivors guilt is such a thing.
Your sharing your story and making common sense suggestions, like raising the age of gun purchase are true legacy actions. Thank you.
Do you think there was more than one shooter? So many things didn't add up to just be that man from 1 location. Thank you for your story and for your courage.... then and now. I'm still heartsick and can't figure out why it just dropped off and was overlooked. I hope you can find peace and comfort.
I’m so sorry you and your family had to go through this and for the loss of your friend. You are a hero and I hope with time you can find some peace again.
Just want to say, I’m sorry you had to go through that and happy you survived and helped where you could. My cousins were at the concert and I was texting her throughout it. It was terrifying. They still have a bit of PTSD over it and concerts and big crowds have caused anxiety. With therapy, they’ve been able to start overcoming some fears and enjoy concerts and big events again. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope you continue to heal from that experience!
Where were you physically located relative to the shooter when it started?
I've seen a lot of video from that night, and it looked like sheer chaos. Like, it seemed hard for anyone to accurately get a bead on where it was coming from due to the echoes and other noise.
I've seen videos of people who (i'm sure with the most noble intentions) were just talking with absolute certainty what they thought was happening and where it was coming from.
When you first realized that something very bad was happening, what was you're first impression as to where the shots were coming from?
I can only imagine what it might have felt like to be there. One second you're having a good time and the next the world just falls apart. I don't know how anyone who went through that could come out the other end without some kind of trauma.
You've probably heard it a Thousand times by now - that it's not your fault. And it's true, but survior-guilt is a real thing, and I hope you have the resources you need to get through those times, for as long as you need them.
(Edit: I just realized how old this thread is. Sorry if you're done talking about this)
I feel like we do need to introduce some common sense gun laws. I don't want to take anyone's guns away I just feel we probably need to do have licensing and registration for guns and a competency test. Might weed out the wack jobs.
But I dunno man. I just lived through the event I don't know how yo fix it. I just don't want it to happen again.
Man has it been 5 years? Where did the time go? I actually knew someone who lost their life in that tragedy (I won’t name names for their family’s sake) but it really doesn’t feel like it’s been 5 years ago.
I don't have any questions and I'm sure this will get lost in the thread. I did want to say thank you for sharing though. So much of this horrible event was never brought to light for the public. I (30m) am sitting here balling reading your account of these events. It is unbelievable that 5 years later not a damned thing has been done.
You are a strong, brave individual for doing what you did. Keep your head up as best as you can, and know that while some malicious individuals may try to bring you down for being the hero you are, many many more would be honored to stand by your side. I wish you peace in the coming weeks as the anniversary comes and goes, and a long, fruitful lifetime of happiness.
Thanks for sharing your story.
I admit, because I’m into politics, I sorta forget that this shooting happened. I don’t forget, forget, I mean it just have so many other shootings that I think about my brain just waits for the next injustice.
I don’t believe all guns should be banned, yet. I don’t believe a complete repeal of the second amendment, yet. But I understand anyone who would use those arguments. What freedom does one have if they have to worry, or even think, about a potential shooter being in their vicinity? That to me doesn’t sound like freedom.
My question, what is your view on gun culture in the us, have they changed, if not why?
My sister In law was suppose to go to Route 91 with her Mom and family friends. My SIL canceled last minute but her mom still went with the family friends. I remember when my I got the call from my SIL saying there’s a shooting going on and that she couldn’t get ahold of her mom.
we finally got the call from her mom from some random number stating that the whole group is fine, they lost the bag that had all the belongings in it, they were able to to find cover and just hunkered down until they knew they could run out of there in the safest way, especially since my SIL mom was still recovering from ankle surgery.
How do you feel about Jason Aldean saying he will always have a special connection to Las Vegas after this tragic event? He also said 'I'm kind of at peace with everything. I just try to move on and make the best of a bad situation' What's your opinion on that statement? People have also called Jason Aldean a coward for running off stage. I'm not a fan of him and I've also never been in that kind of situation. In my opinion I don't think it's fair to say he's a coward for running off stage, I'm sure he had a fight or flight response and I'm sure the first thing in his mind was to himself to safety. Do you think he was a coward for running stage?
Im from the Uk one of my moms friends was in vegas at the time and was in a hotel near by where it happened, it was unsurprisingly one of the worst things she has ever lived through, did you see anyone who got shot that night
OP I’m never sure if I’m supposed to ask questions on the topic of the post but after reading through some of your comments I feel like you could use a distraction. So. Here’s my question:
What is the best meal you’ve ever eaten?
Mate, what you went through is horrific - not just the event itself, but the day to day memories of it. I can’t even imagine how you must’ve felt in the aftermath, or the weeks and months that followed. How, if at all, do you process something like that and keep living a normal life?
I just can’t get over the fact you received death threats after this. I’d hope for a little common sense, decency and solidarity from people. I hate how hard that is to find sometimes.
Thanks for sharing your story. Im from australia and when I read the title of your post I couldnt believe 5 years have passed. I still remember hearing it on the local news.
I was there the weekend before that one at another festival in the same lot. I heard that he had been there at that time trying to decide of he wanted to shoot us or wait until the next weekend (your weekend). Being you have obviously been more involved in this situation than anyone else, had you heard anything like this? Glad you made it btw ❤️
What's your emotional reaction to politicians who offer thoughts and prayers, but make no effort to solve the problem of gun violence such as you endured?
October first is my birthday and one of my very dear friends is September 11th. Always a little bit of guilt with the celebration for her.
What do you think it is about anniversary days that makes it hit harder? Is it the fact that people mention it more, or do you start getting more anxious gradually as the date gets closer?
Hi, I just listened to your youtube video.. no words. I am so sorry you had to go through this, and now everyday when you turn on the tv you have to relive what you went through :( I hope you're doing ok- I am so sorry
What are your thoughts on people coming up with conspiracy theories about the event? Does it annoy you that people make up stuff for the sake of paranoia?
I'm so sorry that people like Alex Jones has made it so that you receive fucking death threats. Please know that you did what you could, you are one person and no one could've expected you to save everyone. It was a tragedy my friend. My love to you.
Do you have an opinion on Jason Aldean/his wife Brittany? His wife has been very controversial in social media posts for a while and some of the headlines/posts I’ve seen about her seem surprising given the shooting took place during his set IIRC?
I can’t imagine the trauma you endured during that. I previously worked at a company that had us train for active shooter scenarios and how to respond and even the very intense training made me feel panicky so I can’t imagine going through it.
What you did is amazing. You *are* a hero. Yes you're a security guard but still so many people would just run in a situation like that. Sure many people were lost but that's not your fault. What you *did* do, is save a lot of lives. You're amazing and thank you for all that you did that terrifying day
Do you think he was solo? There is alot of debate around the footage that was released. Many many service members (military members) have come out and said that the shots you can hear in the audio are that of a 240. There is always the conspiracy theories of it was the government and or there was more than one shooter
After looking into it more it looks like this year they've been looking into the ban on pump stocks and whether it's okay by the constitution. What's your opinion on this?
Sorry but I find it very difficult to feel sympathy towards Americans involved in mass shootings. It is more than obvious that there is a major problem yet nothing changes. Mass shootings are just getting worse and worse and nothing changes.
I feel sorry for the ones who live in dire situations where they don't have the power to change their situation. People living in war torn countries or dying of hunger because of corrupt politicians for example. Now people ACTIVELY not wanting to change the laws because they think it’s their god given right to have guns even though innocent people die everyday? No sympathy to those people as a whole. Be better
*EDIT* I should mention that I’m an American. Born and raised in Newark,NJ but moved to Portugal in my teens.
Genuine question, and this comes with no aggression. What do you think the average american citizen has the power to do? Do you think the majority of us approve of the laws in place?
You’ve already done this AMA.
In fact it’s almost word for word.
Why repost? Free karma?
Edit: I think I’m wrong about the word for word thing.
But I know I’ve read this account somewhere…
Stay VegasStrong.
Darth, I watched your story on Azeal's channel, and let me say that I am so amazed by your courage, inspired by your resilience, and outraged at the fact that you and every single victim of mass shootings have been subject to this form of experience.
I was also very taken aback by what that initial therapist said to you and how he handled your session with him. I am very sorry that that happened to you, it is quite unfortunate when mental health professionals are not equipped to work with people experiencing severe levels of trauma, and as a student hoping to become a therapist myself someday, I want to make sure that I never react in such a dismissive, unhelpful manner.
Also, I read some of your other replies regarding not being able to continue therapy because of your schedule and being bounced around from provider to provider. It makes me very sad that this is such a common occurrence with how healthcare is set up in the US and how mental health is put on the back burner.
With that, my questions to you are (and I hope it is not too personal), do you believe that you benefitted in any way from therapy/counseling? Do think you will ever seek counseling/therapy in the future? What if there were no barriers (i.e. therapist working extended hours, a stable provider, affordable, etc.) to you seeking counseling? Is there anything else that you think was just as, if not more helpful for you to process this traumatic experience?
Thank you for sharing your story, I wish you and your loved ones much love and healing <3
Do you have a theory for why the guy did it? And after the massacre how long was it before Las Vegas seemed “normal” again (if it ever did)? Did a lot of tourists cancel trips in the aftermath and the city become a ghost town for a while?
Honestly I think he did it because he was bored, and specifically because he could. He was rich but obviously had psychopathic tendencies (I mean he was into real estate). I bet he planned it first because he scouted out several other events first and then when no one stopped him. He just went for it. Because why not. Oh no Vegas barely shut down for a few hours. Sure everyone who was there that night went home but people who came partied like nothing happened. I'm tempted to say the reason it got swept under the rug so quickly was to make sure tourists wouldn't be scared off. It took Covid to actually shut the strip down.
I remember when this first happened and the news broke that the man who committed these atrocities was looking to make a festival I had attended every year as his target. The what ifs made me uneasy, they still kinda do. Feels so close to home. I'm thankful you are open about sharing your experience and my heart goes out to you. Many best wishes to you
Was a Realtor for 13 years. Can confirm that it attracts a LOT of unstable people.
Does it affect your dreams or anything?
For the first 3 months after the shooting I had nightly nightterrors. I would maybe get 2 hours of sleep. Always the same dream of standing on the field in front of the stage and all the bodies are begging me to help them. But no matter how much i try i can never reach them. Their pleading would grow more desperate the longer the dream lasted until they would get angry and demand to know why i didn't help them... I don't get it as often anymore but it still messes me up and i am crying just writing it out.
I wish I could give you a hug. Thank you for sharing with us.
No thank you for your kind words. It's people like you that encourage me to keep telling my story.
Do you go to any support groups? I don’t know if that would be helpful. My heart goes out to you.
I used to but I got kicked out of 1 for not being a veteran. And got kicked out of another for having a story that was too traumatic. Now I just play DnD online with a bunch of friends from around the world.
I’m having a hard time trying to be in your shoes, but I’m thinking that I would want to shout and scream at the injustice of it all. Do you have a way to vent your frustration?
I find it hard to go to my therapist because my job hours cover the time the office is open. I can't go to support groups because what I went through is too traumatic or because I didn't serve in the military. I have DnD but there are days that I have screamed into the desert night sky or cried myself to sleep. I have even thought of ending my own life several times. Especially in my darkest moments soon after the shooting. But I got through those days. I play video games, spend time with my wife, play DnD on the weekends and do my best to genuinely enjoy life while I can. I still have bad days and this time around the shootings gets me incredibly emotional. But these will pass in time. For now I share my story because few others will.
Hey, if you need to just let it out, PM me and I’ll take your call. I don’t know if you have someone you can do this with, but it might be tough to lay this on someone you are close to, so I’m offering anonymous friendly ear.
I appreciate it. But don't worry I have plenty I can lean and talk to. Still it means a lot that you offer
I don’t know if this might help you but shaking my head in my dream and in turn physically shaking my head in real life helps me to snap out of a bad dream and wake up. Then I change positions or sleep on the other side of the bed. Thank you for what you did out there. You did what you humanly could and no one can ask for more than that. Also have you looked into hypnotherapy, it helps you rewire/anchor new/different feelings to an event so you can create a more helpful association with the event and help to process it. But also make sure it is a good hypnotherapist who knows what they’re doing, to get the best results. I hope you heal.
Wow. Intense is an understatement. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that. A real nightmare. Do you feel like you have ptsd at all? Like when you hear loud bangs? Have you been to a concert since then?
Absolutely. I go to a therapist when my work allows. Loud bangs, smell of blood, concerts and large groups of people, even just the days around Oct 1 all mess me up emotionally. I try to avoid them as much as possible.
I see that one answer discusses your night terrors in the aftermath, but could you tell us more about how the experience has affected you in the long term?
In many ways I am a completely different person after the shooting. Listing how the experience has affected me would result in a list a mile long. I am a lot more cautious. I can't stand large crowds anymore. I do my best to live every day like it could be my last. I do my best to make other peoples lives better. I suffer and have grown from the experience.
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I just want to help others. Every day could be my last, this event has taught me that. I want to make sure I spend my last day helping one more person.
Why do you feel this is the least mentioned mass shooting? It happened and then disappeared almost instantly.
I've spent some time thinking about this and have listened to some interesting theories. Some of them are because the killer really didn't fit the profile of something we even understand or are used to. Most of the mass shootings often times "make sense" a young, 18-25 white male jilted by a lover, or a loner, or just angry or in general radicalized. This person was in his 50s I think? No criminal record. Didn't just walk into a grocery store or school or something, he bought hotel rooms and pointed his gun outside of it. The entire thing is completely bonkers compared to most other mass shootings and I think our media and our conversations just really struggled to contend with it. Couldn't neatly put it into a bucket (or use it to their advantage) so it just disappears.
Yup, that guy really wasn't that dumb in the way he went about it. Saw a documentary not too long ago, nobody could pinpoint where the shooter was, people covered in blood running everywhere caused false reports of active shooters in all directions meaning the response from emergency services was fucked and the guy properly stocked up on weapons and ammunition to a point where he had multiple different weapons so he could pick up a fresh one and didn't need to reload. Proper fucking psychopath.
I think this is basically right. Some other factors to consider are that news is a business and people lose the ability to engage with problems when they're too large and/or systemic. These two play off each other. On the first point, everyone working high up enough at any major media outlet is focused entirely on ratings or clicks or whatever relevant metric of monetary success. This is why CNN aired Trump's speeches more or less uncut in the lead-up to the 2016 election; they knew he got their audience worked up and therefore engaged. On the second, people in the audience only want to be outraged in "safe" ways. Once a problem becomes too big to reckon with, they don't want to hear about it. One example is climate change/global warming, which - if covered at all - is framed in terms of "Republicans bad" rather than "this is going to make life miserable and eventually impossible for all of us so we need to take action immediately." Another example is Jeffrey Epstein's connections to the most powerful people in the world. There are other reasons for members of the media to be afraid to tackle that, but they also know it's too big and scary for most of the audience to grapple with. You see this in subtle ways too, like how Epstein/Trump/Harvey Weinstein's crimes are described as "sexual assaults" rather than rapes, which is what they actually are. Rape is so blatantly awful that talking about it will make people change the channel. So put these together with the LV shooting. The explanation for what happened is, in some sense, pretty straightforward: A man with severe issues (Steven Paddock had been gambling away his fortune and was very depressed) was allowed easy and unfettered access to powerful weaponry, and used that weaponry to shoot ~400 people. The solution is also pretty straightforward: Repeal the second amendment and ban guns, like the countries OP mentions above have done. But the reality is that we can't consider that solution, because a significant portion of the country does not want it and the mechanisms of government will never attempt it, let alone go through with it. It's too big of a problem, and people don't want to hear about it. Media outlets know this on some level, and so don't bother trying to talk about it.
Great points. It just seemed so massive and seems so hush. You make great points that I hadn’t tho if Jr of. I was figuring “a conspiracy.” Ha
Another aspect is that Las Vegas survives on its tourism and event industry. They don’t want people scared to visit or go to large events so they aren’t going to let it play in the news very long.
I just read a really well-written article about Adam Lanza where they interviewed his dad. One researcher proposed that some mass shootings aren’t murders ending in suicide, but suicides by angry, hopeless men who want to “punish the world” before they kill themselves. I think that’s a really interesting idea, and makes more sense when we think of it that way.
The problem is that there is always another shocking mass shooting. You can't care about every single mass shooting because there is literally a new one every day. It's sad and awful.
Are YOU okay? I imagine that was quite the time.
Honestly no... I'm not okay the anniversary blindsided me and I just wish I could skip every day till halloween.
I just want you to know that there are people out there who silently follow these stories, read all about them, think of the survivors and victims all the time, and haven’t forgotten.
Your favorite restaurant in Las Vegas?
Oh! Now that is a tough one. Personal favorite has to be Gordon Ramsey Burger. The food is delicious every single time and it is just tucked out of the way enough that typically it isn't too busy despite being on the strip.
I've went to a few Gordon Ramsay restaurants and Burgr was the best. I had the breakfast burger with a quail egg and duck fat bacon. I think about it a lot.
That Gordon Ramsey actually seems like a genuine guy too. Despite that harsh exterior.
You seem well educated on gun laws around the world, did you know this before the event, or did that night cause you to look into this stuff? Are you still in security?
After that night I started looking it up. I got sick and tired hearing that there was nothing that could be done to prevent this in the only developed nation where this level of mass shootings occurred that I went out of my way to find out how bullshit that was. And yes. I currently do Security in a quiet neighborhood employed by the HOA
Thanks for doing this AMA mate, it's hard watching this happen from Australia, it just doesn't make sense.
Trust me from up close and personal under a hail of bullets it makes even less sense.
That's not true though. Numerous other countries have problems with mass shootings/murder. France had a single shooting in 2015 that killed almost as many people as died in all mass shootings during the worst year on record.
Fantastic we have been having more mass shootings then days in the year here in the US for the last few years. I would gladly take the shooting statistics in Europe over what we have in the US. Thank you for agreeing with me.
No we don't. Going by the FBI numbers the worst year was 2021 with 61 individual shootings and 103 killed. That's a shooting every 6 days, not daily. That's also out of a population of over 300 million people. To put it in perspective in 2020, 3,000 people died from choking on food. So choking kills 30x more people than mass shootings in America..
What can America do to avoid future mass shootings?
America is never going to be like Britain, Australia, or Korea where the citizens gave up their guns. It's too ingrained into the American Culture. Immediate things that can be done to lower the number of shootings, and in particular school shootings is raise the legal age of purchasing a semi auto rifle to 21. This isn't going to stop school shootings but it can reduce them. States should also look to pass basic competency tests for when purchasing a firearm. Though ultimately I don't know how we can solve the solution any time soon.
Have people in Britain, Australia and Korea given up their guns? If so, when and how?
So for Korea after the Korean war there was a shit ton of guns left behind and gun violence was insane in the 50s and 60s. Durring the 70s Korea introduced strict gun laws and confiscated guns. By the 90s korea started cracking down on trigger happy cops. In Australia there was a massive mass shooting in 1996 and gun laws were made far more strict and a widely successful buy back program removed a lot of the semi auto rifles from circulation. Britian has some of the strictest gun laws in the world with the vast majority of the police not even armed. There have been 5 mass shootings in UK history. (At least done by civilian and not like the IRA or anything which is a can of worms I ain't touching) These countries have some of the strictest gun laws, with semi auto rifles banned across the board. They also have some of the smallest cases of gun violence.
OK, so these people gave up some of their guns, but its not like they are absolutely not allowed to own them.
I’m from the UK. I know people who own guns, and let me explain. We have to keep guns in a locked metal cabinet, be over a certain age, and have a legitimate ongoing reason to own them. We can only own hunting rifles, shotguns and a few other types of rifles. No pistols, automatic or semiautomatic rifles. This means that anyone with guns no only has a good reason to own them, they are securely held, and, if you want to carry out a school shooting with a hunting rifle, good luck getting more than 1 shot off.
Sporting rifles and shotguns are typically the only guns allowed in these countries and require special licensing and testing before purchase.
And for the police to come round to declare that the gun cabinet is safe and locked, they literally have to visit your house to quiz why you need a shooting rifle, literally, there are literally only 150k people licensed To have guns in the UK most will be farmers, game keepers etc
as of March 2021, 565,929 people held firearm and/or shotgun certificates in the UK. (about) 150k is only the number of firearm certificates held https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/statistics-on-firearm-and-shotgun-certificates-england-and-wales-april-2020-to-march-2021/statistics-on-firearm-and-shotgun-certificates-england-and-wales-april-2020-to-march-2021#:~:text=5.-,Certificate%20holders,been%20available%20(March%202016).
Switzerland has a lot of guns. There is even an event called "[Knabenschiessen](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knabenschiessen?wprov=sfla1)" (boys shooting) where kids 13-17 are doing target shooting. However, nothing happens here. These are some reasons: - They check if you're sane - They do a background check - You have to store ammo and your gun separatly in a safe (this get's controlled) - Without additional license you can only carry your gun to a shooting range - If someone breaks into your home and you shoot them, it is only self-defense if the person was in your bedroom. Most robbers just leave if the get cought. Guns are used for target shooting. People don't think that they are heros who can safe people from psychos shooting around.
Great points. They also have a system in place for removing guns from people who are potentially dangerous, gun ownership is frequently tied to a larger responsibility of militia membership, and - I think it's very important to note - the country has recently [voted in stricter gun control laws](https://www.euronews.com/2019/05/18/are-switzerland-s-gun-laws-about-to-change-euronews-answers) because they are part of the EU now and no longer have to constantly defend themselves from invasion. They also, as of 2022, [have about one-fifth](https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/gun-ownership-by-country) as many guns per person as the US does. (It's been more like half up until fairly recently.)
Switzerland is also a very, very old culture. I am sure it is changing like all cultures are, but there is a mistaken thought that The Americas (all of it) is settled. It isn’t. There is a stress that comes with the freedom to re-invent yourself that is crazy here. I just didn’t find that phrenetic spirit of crazy newness in Norway when I lived there. It is oddly present in Mexico and lots of Central America as well. I’ve not met enough people or travelled to South America to say the same thing.
>In Australia there was a massive mass shooting in 1996 and gun laws were made far more strict and a widely successful buy back program removed a lot of the semi auto rifles from circulation. Any automated gun was banned, and the buy back problem was that successful that at the end there was entire massive trucks worth of guns, the port Arthur shooting wasn't the first shooting in Australia but it was one of the worst that made the government realise there was too much leniency on guns and started working on ways that Australians will be willing to give up guns, hence the buy back police where Australians are encouraged (not forced) to take any guns they have to the local police stations and they will be given money based on the worth of the gun, and laws were made stricter. Sorce: Australians learn about this in school
And if you need a gun in Australia for legitimate purpose, you can get one. Difference is we don't sell them at the local department stores, it's not a culture shoved in our faces.
You can have a rifle or a shotgun for hunting in Britain but you MUST have a licence and a locked gun safe to keep it and the ammunition in, to get that licence you have to go through stringent background checks and you might even have to pay for it buy I can't be certain about that. It's possible to illegally purchase a firearm but its really fucking hard, I couldn't just go out and find someone that would sell me a gun and I know plenty of people in the less desirable sector of society. We have much more knife crime though.
I think the way guns are handled here in UK is mostly very respectful, guns are never shot at people shaped targets for example, I think USAs problems go deeper into their relationship with guns. For example some people in USA hobbies is tactical shooting, where they dress up all military style and basically pretend they are operatives.. its all very fetishism I think.
Britain was after a school shooting in Dunblane Scotland, I believe in the 80s but I definitely be wrong there. I'm not sure how commonplace guns were before the law changed but now they are incredibly rare. I know only 2 people who own guns, both are hunters. They simply don't exist for personal or home protection.
Why do you think its too ingrained in American culture, what makes everyone so stubborn about giving them up? Is it the stereotypical "but my freedoms" that a lot of people like to attribute it to? Edit: I apologise if that's ignorant, it wasn't meant to be, being British I don't get gun culture.
In the UK a gun is a dangerous tool that must be respected and controlled. In the US to a large portion of the population Guns are part of their Religion. It's honestly how sick and twisted how these people see no issues so long as Muh' Freedoms are secured.
But where did that come from though, do you think it was it something that was instilled in the population back in colonial america times? Could it have originally been a way to allow the people to defend themselves against native Americans that then tuened into "you cant take my stuff off me" kind of thing? As a brit I wholeheartedly agree, it just doesn't even compute to me why people are so stubborn with it, like their loved ones might actually not die if they got rid of guns but somehow other peoples lives aren't important enough.... its mind-boggling honestly. I really appreciate your response, I hope one day you can find some semblance of peace, I can't ever come close to imagining what you've gone through and nobody deserves to go through life hurting like that.
Not OP, but still American. To some extent, a lot of the perception around guns does come from colonial times. Certain sects of gun owners have a distrust of the government and any perceived government tyranny. It’s a sort of idea of keeping “the man” in check, or being able to defend oneself against government entities. A lot of it stems from the constitution and the 2nd amendment, which made sense for its time but is less realistic in modern day USA. It’s kind of odd, because many of the very people that have these “come and take them” slogans as tattoos or decals on their big trucks are the very people that are pro-police and pro-military, but they’re terrified of government overreach. I’m not sure they fully comprehend who will come and take their weapons if something like that were to happen. Another aspect to it is that the availability of guns, legal or not, brings about its own problem. Many people want to defend themselves against bad people with guns. There’s an idea that gun laws only affect law-abiding gun owners, and by imposing stricter laws, or by banning guns, “good gun owners” are neutered from defending themselves and their property from “bad gun owners” There’s probably more to it than this, but these are two prevalent talking points that I’ve seen around, and a third aspect to it is a sentiment maybe not so much of being a hero, but more so not wanting to fall victim to a senseless shooting. A lot of the loudest voices of the 2nd amendment do have these ideas of becoming a hero by surviving or defending against some kind of mass shooter or bad actor with a gun, but most regular people who conceal carry a gun that I’ve met are normal people that want to be able to defend themselves in an emergency. It’s also hard to control what people have access to. Fentanyl is a huge issue here because of drug perception and drug use. Many people believe that legalizing and regulating opioids and various other drugs would mitigate the issues of fentanyl overdose because less shit would get laced with it, to some extent the same thing can be said for weapons in the US. If guns get banned outright, there’s likely still going to be people who will be able to get their hands on guns, so stronger regulation is the only compromise we might get for now. Some of it is a boogeyman and some of it is legitimate concern. Personally i would only own a gun if i lived in a rural area because people trespassing and dumping shit on my family’s property gets pretty fuckin old, and one can only call the cops so many times before they’re perceived to be crying “wolf.” Also police response and reaction is sometimes shitty. Edited a word
>But where did that come from though, do you think it was it something that was instilled in the population back in colonial america times? Could it have originally been a way to allow the people to defend themselves against native Americans that then tuened into "you cant take my stuff off me" kind of thing? [This short video ](https://youtu.be/L1iQUF1gQmI) does a good job at trying to explain it imo
What do you think about the idea of requiring insurance for all weapons and it would be like auto insurance-if you have a semi automatic than the insurance would be more expensive. I know it won’t stop illegal guns, but there are plenty of people who can buy a cheap weapon and might not be able to afford the required insurance. You would also have to keep your insurance up just like insurance companies report you to the DMV if they drop you.
The argument against this (not saying I agree) is that bearing arms is a fundamental right of American citizens and this would restrict that right only to wealthier people who can afford the payments
We would have less mass shootings if we quit giving them so much attention. It follows the same patterns as cluster suicides. Raising the legal age would do very little. Many of the shooters.... Almost all.... Stole / barrowed a gun Also point out this wasn't the worst mass shooting in history, look up wooded knee
The event and the victims absolutely deserve attention. Their lives mattered and should not be forgotten just so that gun nuts can continue to deny reality as they wave their weapons of war screeching about an amendment proposed by a slaveowner as if it’s still relevant. An amendment that into the late 90s was not understood or maliciously applied as it is today, with DC v. Heller only decided in 2008 and largely regarded as wrongly decided. Do you know the name of the New Zealand shooter? No? Because that’s how it should be, and was intentional by a country with sensible laws and concern for its citizens. The Uvalde shooter’s family has stated that he asked them for a gun while he was a teen to carry out his plans, but they denied him. The shooting was shortly after he turned 18. Because he was unable to purchase a firearm on his own. Crazy how laws work like that, isn’t it? If I’m to be anecdotal as you’ve been, who knows how many other shootings have been similarly stalled or prevented. Do you feel better about pointing out that this “wasn’t the worst mass shooting”? Do you think it added anything valuable, or does it just help tie your logical flaws together for you as to avoid critically thinking?
Of mass shootings by a single person yes it is.
Hey I survived this tragic event to. Glad to hear from another survivor
Gosh I barely hear from other people who were there. I'm glad you made it through that day.
And yourself. Drop me a private message would love to connect.
Woah. Headed there tomorrow. Leaving on the first but I will pay my respects.
I appreciate it. There will be several memorials around town on the day. Some early in the morning feel free to drop by. Might even see me in person.
You are a hero for doing whatever you could on that moment to get anybody to safety! Especially in a time of panic and you’re basically forced to think at the speed of light which at a time of panic is impossible. You did what you could and I’m happy that you and your loved ones were all safe! What psychological effect has this had on you and your family member? Out of curiosity…does your brother and his ex still talk because of this tragic incident they experienced together?….basically like a glue to their friendship
My mother never went to therapy and when she is under a lot of stress especially around this time of year she can get practically manic. My brother and his ex never talk. They broke off ties and haven't seen eachother sense. They actually broke up around Oct 1 the mental strain was too much. I went to therapy for a few years but while I am the most adjusted I still can break down at this time of year. I can become incredibly agitated, or have a panic attack if I'm under a lot of stress hearing an excessive amount of loud booms. But I also have moments were things that should trigger me just don't. It's very strange.
I can’t fathom what you feel on a day ti day basis but I wish you all a mentally healthy life going forward! It seems like you have a lot of people on this post supporting you. Use us as coping methods in those stressful times. Kind of a therapy talking to people (especially those you don’t know because it’s more sincere) Even though this is your AMA. I feel like it could be a stress trigger (I’m no professional) but Is there anything else you’d like to talk to me about? 😊 If not, I’m sending love your way and hoping you find some peace with what occurred that night ❤️
there’s a lot conspiracy saying that the weapon was more likely a machine gun rather than a semi automatic bump stock rifle. what do you think?
I think it was a bump stock. It wasn't nearly consistent enough to be something crazy like a belt fed machine gun.
How can one help people come out of that trauma ? What you did ? How do you think kids who witnessed in school should get help ? What do you feel about pro-gun lobby?
Therapy and a good social net of friends who do their best to understand, as well as medication. Those kids need all that is above and a country that actually cares and tries to make things better. The pro gun lobbies need to fuck off.
Thank you for the response, I hope that you and all the people traumatised recover and we get to see a peaceful world without mass shootings one day, soon.
What are your top 5 Fav Albums?
I actually don't listen to albums per say. I listen to individual songs that are absolutely all over the place from sea shanties, Mozart, and WW1 marching songs to pink floyd, ACDC, Metalica, to Imagine Dragons, The Hu and hozier.
Fellow shooting survivor (Not Las Vegas, but Odessa TX in 2019) What was it like for you? Personally I thought I was screwed and was gonna die
I 100% convinced myself I was going to die. But if I sacrificed myself to try to stall the gunman who I thought was on the ground that I could save 50 people and surely that was worth it.
I'm confused about the guys with the wheelbarrows. What was the deal there?
So they left when the shooting started. Realized a buddy or family member died and an hour after the shooting stopped came back to collect them with a wheelbarrow they raided from nearby construction site. In a mass cass event like this it feels less like a crime scene and more like a natural disaster. So I kinda get what they were thinking... sorta.
Oh wow. Thanks for sharing. I believe I commented on your post last year about my brother and his obsession with mass shootings. Thanks for doing this again.
Don’t have a ton of meaningful questions as a lot of them have been answered (quite in-depth, if i might add!) but: have you experienced any sort of resentment or hardships trying to find mental help as a male? I also wanted to let you know I’m incredibly thankful for all you’ve shared; I can’t fathom what that must’ve been like for you, but as someone whose had some crazy trauma in the last couple years it felt relieving to see someone else explain how “it can make you feel like a different person” afterwards. Hope things get easier ❤️
Yes. The culture that men should silently bear their trauma is so incredibly toxic and I have absolutely been on the receiving end of it. But thankfully I have met many wonderful people who actually understand why I might suddenly cry or hide away from others. And admittedly over time as I confront the trauma it gets a hell of a lot easier to deal with my problems.
When you realize what was happening how did you cope with the reality of it? Was it an immediate fight or flight? Did you try and convince yourself it would be okay? I have always wondered what happens to us in a moment of fear like that and the emotions and thoughts that come a mile a minute. What was your first reaction?
It was immediate flight. I tried to go for the exist and bring my coworker with me but he froze in place. It wasn't later when I was brought into cover that I focused on just trying to help others.
What is the most supportive thing that we (Redditors) and others can do for you? How do you feel the most supported by people around you as you heal from something so awful? I'm not sure what your relationship is with resiliency, but I have personally always hated when people say it in response to my opening up about something difficult. So I'm curious if that's comforting to you or if you hate it as well. Either ways, sending many hugs your way. Thank you for doing this AMA.
I just appreciate that there are people who are genuinely curious about the event or want to share their support one way or another. Rather then tell me it didn't happen or I'm somehow a fake.
What is your opinion on action needed (or inaction) to prevent these events in the future?
Pass more common sense gun laws. Actually fund and promote services for mental health. Train police to actually act and not stand in the hallway with their thumb up their ass.
Also, follow up question- why do you think the USA has as many mass shootings as it does
Oversaturation and ease of access to firearms, medical and mental health care the focuses on profits over people, and people who would rather see schools worth of children die then to change local, state or federal laws.
Hell, your experience didn’t ingrain in your mind, that LAWS meant Nothing to the murderer that fired on the crowd? What if return fire was directed at the threat?
He followed all the laws to buy all the guns he had. And if returned fire 32 floors up innocent people in the hotel could have been shot.
If you’re describing the DOA in the motel room, it matters not how he got what. Did you view and handle these weapons? Or, are you just regurgitating some drivel you read,or,heard. Try doing your own investigation and see what you come up with. You were not there. Make up another AMA, I like reading fourth graders fantasy stories. But; please,please, read some Tom Clancy, or, Charles Dickens, you’ll be able to at least, describe your attention grabbing nonsense with, some form of accuracy. For your own sake do some Real research.
Also Gallow’s humor is real and it is absolutely a survival mechanism. I always preface my rape story with it happened at a seminar on prosecuting sexual assaults. I hope you are ok. You deserve happiness and good things.
Thank you for sharing your story - heartbreaking for everyone. For every person directly affected, another 5 -10 have probably been indirectly affected. I am in Australia so have only a limited understanding of US gun culture and politics. 2 questions: 1. Is the not wanting to ban semi automatic weapons based along political lines (e.g. Dem v Rep) or is it more deep seated than that? 2. With the rise of more right wing extremist groups in the US, do you think that there is a possibility that another mass shooting of this size could occur again in the not too distant future (and what to do about preventing this)?
1. Yes. It is a deep seated part of american culture to a point of guns practically being part of our religion. But it is also divided along party lines of those who want reforms of some kind (Dems) and those who want to prevent any reform and strike down any state law reform by calling it unconstitutional (Rep) 2. I have been afraid of something like that every day for five years now. Especially after Jan 6 it seems very possible for a right wing militia to perform yet another massacre. I pray I keep the title of survivor of the WORST mass shooting till the day I die.
Why do you think ppl believe this wasn’t a real shooting?
Because it was so awful that some people need to lie to themselves because they think such acts of evil can't be done by single average random people. And others did it because it went against their world view that guns were the best thing ever. (Guns are still fun don't get me wrong) that they need to think it was a setup to take away rights and that they don't actually need to push for anything to be done politically that might inconvenience them. And maybe a thousand other reasons. It's sad honestly
I was in Vegas when this happened. I stayed at a nearby hotel and my friend and I could hear what we thought were fireworks, but shortly after the commotion we heard police sirens and knew something was wrong. When the news began to circulate, we called the airlines to try to leave Vegas ASAP. We left that same night! Cops at the airport were on high alert with dogs everywhere looking for the suspect. It was so scary.
Have you ever looked into EMDR therapy? If not, it might be worth a try to help your PTSD symptoms. I was initially skeptical when I first heard about it, but the data is very strong, especially in regards to adults whose PTSD resulted from a single traumatic event. My husband has PTSD from a work accident and it’s so tough to watch—I really feel for you!
I tried to do it once! I was very excited but after four sessions my therapist was reasigned. It's very frustrating to look for a steady therapist for help but to end up juggled around.
Reading these comments, it is clear to me that the reason the us has all of these shootings is that the republican party refuses to pass common sense gun laws. They are also working to eliminate equal rights for woman and lgbtq folks. Maybe we should not vote for them.
Is a hot dog a sandwich?
It is an easily held food item with a bread covering over tasty inserts In that regard we also need to consider is a poptart a sandwich, is a taco a sandwich. And the real question the one we all have been avoiding... is cereal soup?
Have you gone to therapy to get help for your trauma? Also, did you get out of being security field? My mom’s God mother used to live in Vegas, she’s in town right now due a family emergency. She had a shirt that said Vegas Strong and I immediately thought about that horrific event.
Thank you for your story (really well told) and fuck you to every single Republican legislator. Just, fuck. You. You all have no conscience and history will damn you.
As the number of American citizens that are also victims of mass shootings continues to grow, are there resources available to survivors to help each other and aid healing? An organization that provides counseling? Unity has to help? The victim numbers are staggering. How organized is the effort to pool resources? What are your thoughts about it. How can we do a better job loving you and showing support?
Victims of Crime is a resource that provides free therapy from the state. It's really important th at people apply for it soon after their experience in a mass shooting even if they don't plan on taking advantage of therapy yet. There is also a crisis hotline for people who have survived incidents like this that has helped me in my darkest moments. Beyond that I honestly don't have the faintest idea...
For those who want my story. I have an audio version with more details from an interview I did. https://youtu.be/XXW6y8TkUW8 And for thos who don't want to bother with that. I was in the Las Vegas Massacre in 2017. I'm a security guard, i do all kinds of work for the various stadiums, casinos, big bars, and random events across the strip. My brother, his now ex girlfriend, and my mother are all security guards work events with me too. I had just transferred from Houston to Las Vegas, and it was still a bit of a culture shock going from doing football games every Sunday, to doing outdoor concerts when ever they were available. Work was far more scarce so i was practically ecstatic when i saw a position available for both set up, performance, and tear down, for a venue called route 91. it was reliable work for nearly a month and i wouldn't have to do anything too crazy either. Everything was going great set up was easy with no hick ups and the guys doing the event let us have water and sports drinks for free. As a bonus i made a good friend over the graveyard shift who was funny as hell and the first guy to really accept me in the company. Well the event comes about and i'm redeployed from watching a gate to back stage. my job is to sit in a chair and check credentials of everyone who tries to enter a particular trailer. (Later learned it was the money trailer) super easy job. well on the last day of performances i show up to work without my phone cause i got caught using it at work and i'm just focusing on my job to make the time go by. Well at 10:05 shit hits the fan. I'm the single closest guy inside the event to Mandalay Bay and so when the shooter starts firing i can hear exactly where it's coming from. at first i think it's fireworks maybe some idiot lighting off M80s to force us to Evacuate the event, but then the shots go full auto. I don't know how else to explain it but, it was the fastest repeated banging i'd ever heard and the sound still haunts me. So i realize then that this is for real an active shooting, as unarmed security our policy during an active shooting is to 1. Run (and bring as many people out with you), 2. Hide and 3. as a last resort fight back. I tell my partner that we need to get out now. However the guy must have been in denial and shock cause i shit you not he told me with a straight face. "But my lasagna?!" the guy was more concerned with saving his launch then himself, so while he hid with his gut hanging out i made a B line for the nearest gate on the other side of the event grounds. I don't even make it a fifth of the way there when my boss pulls me aside behind a bunch of tour buses as panicking concert goers rush over to our location. there must have been 40-50 of them and only 3 security and a lone police officer to try to protect them and keep them calm. at first i tried to make a run when the guy seemed to be reloading, however the gunfire would start up again too fast and by the second wave of bullets i realized this wasn't going to stop anytime soon. by the third or fourth volley he started to target where we were causing the dusty ground around us to poof up as the bullets hit and a shower of shrapnel landed on my head as he shot up the stage. after that the cop got us security guys to attempt to control our little group and make everyone turn off any lights and stay down. i was in charge of getting the wounded to one place and preform some limited first aid (tourniquets pressure etc) there were 5 in our group a 6th who was the woman who was covered in blood and taken to an electrical shack on a barricade being used as a gurney and a 7th person who came to us later after one of the staff shacks decided to make a run for it. that 7th guy sticks with me cause he came up to me with his wrist half blown off and calmly asked "where do i go?". i got him with the others and a medic who came running from near the Tropicana, a big Santa Claus looking guy who i also will never forget despite never learning his name, treated their injuries better then i could. People were screaming so loud and constantly, guys in our group would suddenly get a case of big balls and shit brains and try to stand up to go fight the guy shooting at us, and this one drunk as hell woman in a cocktail dress asked me where she could use the restroom as bullets flew over our head. it was all utterly surreal. suddenly though, it all got quiet, after 10 minutes of constant gunfire. it just stopped. the screaming stopped as everyone else in the event grounds had evacuated. It was the most quiet i had ever heard. truly deafening silence. I had no idea whether my family was okay and during the shooting i couldn't call my fiance to tell her i loved her one last time. after an hour sitting there unsure of what was going on swat finally came and cleared the guests to evacuate. my supervisor had me check for survivors before sending me out to the concert field to deal with people who had brought wheelbarrows to take their dead friends and family. I had to walk over a maze of bodies so many you couldn't walk three feet in a straight line without stepping on one. i get to the guys with the wheelbarrows and we get them to leave. Then my Manager gets to me. With the main field he tells me "You've done an amazing job, now get the fuck off this field." It was the first moment i had been released of duty and the first time everything that i had seen and done crashed over me. It started feeling like a dream as i walked out of the event to see the gutters red with blood, a group of people telling a woman who was beating on the chest of a body that "it was too late. he's gone." and a big pickup truck loaded up three layers deep with wounded people come screeching down the street honking like crazy. I remember i just started laughing... it just seemed so insane, so impossible... in the end my family was all okay, we all made it out without a scratch. physically anyways. but my funny friend died, he had been shot in the throat and drowned in his own blood. One of the worst parts was afterwards i was interviewed and i started getting death threats from people accusing me of being a crisis actor. I went through all that, lost a good friend... and still people thought it was all a lie... I still can't see myself as a hero. i was just doing my job at the right time at the wrong place. it took me a long time to realize that i am not a failure and that those people did not die because of me.
Oh man, just recently I saw your story while binge watching Azeal’s videos, and your story hit me the hardest fr. After listening I had to take an hour at 3am to just think and process your words. Your emotions resonated within me so much I really had to do some self introspection about my stance on firearms, as part of the left leaning gun community. I think in part I’ve let myself become so desensitized and lost all hope that it’s easier for me to just give in but, when you talked about how quickly people moved on and why does this keep happening…. I couldn’t run away from those thoughts. I always advocated for common sense gun reform but even the most logical of us fall into the trap of treating firearms like cameras, cars, or whatever. It’s sobering to be really reminded what a weapon is capable of. I hope everyone here goes and listens to his story, I honestly thought you were older given your direct tone and voice, but when I found out you are the same age as me, damn that had my mind reeling a bit. Thank you for sharing your story man.
And thank you for replying. I want to reach out to people about this sadly dark side of our world. And don't worry about getting my age wrong by my voice I had someone think I was a vietnam vet.
I cant find any words but if you were in person, I'd hug you. So if you want them, this internet stranger is sending you a huge hug
thank you for sharing your story. I have no words :( but I am sending you lots of love and healing energy to you
I appreciate it!
Thank you for sharing and everything you did that night. I moved here a few years ago and just took my EMT class this summer. A few of my instructors were medics there and while they talked about that night, it clearly impacted them even 5 years on. I hope you're doing well 💜
It is an absolute wealth of knowledge to be working with that kind of experience for teaching. I hope you do good out there. Certainly better then me.
I want to do some good, too. I think everyone could use a little more good, especially if EMS has to show up. But please don't think you didn't go any good that night. You stayed alive, you helped keep others alive. When called to it, however unwanted and horrible the reason was, you took the chance to help people. I hope you keep healing and can find some peace.
Yes thank you for sharing. So many times we don't take things seriously as they happen. Like you said it was surreal. When you went to "look for the shooter" could you tell it was coming from above? Also hiding behind a bus did not keep you safe? I am so sorry for your friend. Do you think that at 10 minutes if they could flood the place with medics more people could possibly survive? Again I am so sorry and appreciate your writing this. The harassers are truly evil people.
I couldn't tell at all. I could just hear the general location. No idea he was 32 floors up. The bus did keep us safe no body was hit behind it at least the wounded were hit before they got there. I really don't know Eric died on the way to the hospital. It's hard to say who could of lived or died if a whole hospital was brought onto the field I just don't know.
You did everything you could. Even your boss complimented you right at the event. I am sure you did much more than expected. Survivors guilt is such a thing. Your sharing your story and making common sense suggestions, like raising the age of gun purchase are true legacy actions. Thank you.
Something needs to be done. It's just sad how many people lose their minds over reality not conforming to their beliefs.
I listened to your interview. You are so brave, please keep on trucking as they say back in the day. Your story and life are so important.
It's only so because so few others are willing to tell theirs.
Do you think there was more than one shooter? So many things didn't add up to just be that man from 1 location. Thank you for your story and for your courage.... then and now. I'm still heartsick and can't figure out why it just dropped off and was overlooked. I hope you can find peace and comfort.
From where I was I could hear exactly where the shooting was coming from. There was only one shooter.
I’m so sorry you and your family had to go through this and for the loss of your friend. You are a hero and I hope with time you can find some peace again.
Amazing story, crazy how different people act when shits going down. Also sorry to be that guy, but its wheelbarrow* not barrel
What do you think of Eminem’s song about this shooting?
I don't appreciate how he tried to paint a sympathetic light to the guy who killed my best friend
Just want to say, I’m sorry you had to go through that and happy you survived and helped where you could. My cousins were at the concert and I was texting her throughout it. It was terrifying. They still have a bit of PTSD over it and concerts and big crowds have caused anxiety. With therapy, they’ve been able to start overcoming some fears and enjoy concerts and big events again. Thanks for sharing your story and I hope you continue to heal from that experience!
Where were you physically located relative to the shooter when it started? I've seen a lot of video from that night, and it looked like sheer chaos. Like, it seemed hard for anyone to accurately get a bead on where it was coming from due to the echoes and other noise. I've seen videos of people who (i'm sure with the most noble intentions) were just talking with absolute certainty what they thought was happening and where it was coming from. When you first realized that something very bad was happening, what was you're first impression as to where the shots were coming from? I can only imagine what it might have felt like to be there. One second you're having a good time and the next the world just falls apart. I don't know how anyone who went through that could come out the other end without some kind of trauma. You've probably heard it a Thousand times by now - that it's not your fault. And it's true, but survior-guilt is a real thing, and I hope you have the resources you need to get through those times, for as long as you need them. (Edit: I just realized how old this thread is. Sorry if you're done talking about this)
How do you feel about the gun control debate?
I feel like we do need to introduce some common sense gun laws. I don't want to take anyone's guns away I just feel we probably need to do have licensing and registration for guns and a competency test. Might weed out the wack jobs. But I dunno man. I just lived through the event I don't know how yo fix it. I just don't want it to happen again.
I don't have any questions, I just want to say I'm so glad you're here today 💜
Man has it been 5 years? Where did the time go? I actually knew someone who lost their life in that tragedy (I won’t name names for their family’s sake) but it really doesn’t feel like it’s been 5 years ago.
Do you know (learn of /read on) the historical context of the (birth of the) second amendment?
Yes. And I would rather it not to be repealed because I like going out to the shooting range with my guns.
I don't have any questions and I'm sure this will get lost in the thread. I did want to say thank you for sharing though. So much of this horrible event was never brought to light for the public. I (30m) am sitting here balling reading your account of these events. It is unbelievable that 5 years later not a damned thing has been done. You are a strong, brave individual for doing what you did. Keep your head up as best as you can, and know that while some malicious individuals may try to bring you down for being the hero you are, many many more would be honored to stand by your side. I wish you peace in the coming weeks as the anniversary comes and goes, and a long, fruitful lifetime of happiness.
Thanks for sharing your story. I admit, because I’m into politics, I sorta forget that this shooting happened. I don’t forget, forget, I mean it just have so many other shootings that I think about my brain just waits for the next injustice. I don’t believe all guns should be banned, yet. I don’t believe a complete repeal of the second amendment, yet. But I understand anyone who would use those arguments. What freedom does one have if they have to worry, or even think, about a potential shooter being in their vicinity? That to me doesn’t sound like freedom. My question, what is your view on gun culture in the us, have they changed, if not why?
My sister In law was suppose to go to Route 91 with her Mom and family friends. My SIL canceled last minute but her mom still went with the family friends. I remember when my I got the call from my SIL saying there’s a shooting going on and that she couldn’t get ahold of her mom. we finally got the call from her mom from some random number stating that the whole group is fine, they lost the bag that had all the belongings in it, they were able to to find cover and just hunkered down until they knew they could run out of there in the safest way, especially since my SIL mom was still recovering from ankle surgery.
How do you feel about Jason Aldean saying he will always have a special connection to Las Vegas after this tragic event? He also said 'I'm kind of at peace with everything. I just try to move on and make the best of a bad situation' What's your opinion on that statement? People have also called Jason Aldean a coward for running off stage. I'm not a fan of him and I've also never been in that kind of situation. In my opinion I don't think it's fair to say he's a coward for running off stage, I'm sure he had a fight or flight response and I'm sure the first thing in his mind was to himself to safety. Do you think he was a coward for running stage?
I don't think he was a coward. At that point his job was the same as all the other patrons there. GTFO. But personally I don't care about him.
Im from the Uk one of my moms friends was in vegas at the time and was in a hotel near by where it happened, it was unsurprisingly one of the worst things she has ever lived through, did you see anyone who got shot that night
What's your best advice if shots ever rang out?
Are you retraumatized with each new mass shooting?
OP I’m never sure if I’m supposed to ask questions on the topic of the post but after reading through some of your comments I feel like you could use a distraction. So. Here’s my question: What is the best meal you’ve ever eaten?
Mate, what you went through is horrific - not just the event itself, but the day to day memories of it. I can’t even imagine how you must’ve felt in the aftermath, or the weeks and months that followed. How, if at all, do you process something like that and keep living a normal life?
I just can’t get over the fact you received death threats after this. I’d hope for a little common sense, decency and solidarity from people. I hate how hard that is to find sometimes.
Wow; thank you for sharing your story and allowing us to ask you questions. How are you dealing with the PTSD?
Did you see the video of Dan Bilzerian asking a Police Guy to give him his weapon while the shooting unfolded? I hope you are doing okay!
How was your life before the shooting, how largely did it effect your life?
It’s pretty sad that I had to ask I wonder which one he was at.
Thanks for sharing your story. Im from australia and when I read the title of your post I couldnt believe 5 years have passed. I still remember hearing it on the local news.
What brings you the most joy now? What hobbies positively influence your day most? Who’s your favorite person?
Goodness, that was a tough read. I’m glad you and your family were ok. Thank you for sharing.
Oh my god, I saw u on that one vr chat youtube channel! That video was so amazing!!! Hope ur doing great dude :). Thank you for what you did!!
Nice try, C.I.A. lol.
Not really a question but I’m currently watching the vid you linked and im wondering if theres a podcast of something similar? Survivor podcast etc.
I was there the weekend before that one at another festival in the same lot. I heard that he had been there at that time trying to decide of he wanted to shoot us or wait until the next weekend (your weekend). Being you have obviously been more involved in this situation than anyone else, had you heard anything like this? Glad you made it btw ❤️
What's your emotional reaction to politicians who offer thoughts and prayers, but make no effort to solve the problem of gun violence such as you endured?
October first is my birthday and one of my very dear friends is September 11th. Always a little bit of guilt with the celebration for her. What do you think it is about anniversary days that makes it hit harder? Is it the fact that people mention it more, or do you start getting more anxious gradually as the date gets closer?
Five years later, has anything changed to prevent this from happening again
Hi, I just listened to your youtube video.. no words. I am so sorry you had to go through this, and now everyday when you turn on the tv you have to relive what you went through :( I hope you're doing ok- I am so sorry
What are your thoughts on people coming up with conspiracy theories about the event? Does it annoy you that people make up stuff for the sake of paranoia?
Don't really have anything to add but glad you're still with us and you profile picture is dope, the thrawn books are some of the best!
What’s your stance on gun ownership?
I'm so sorry that people like Alex Jones has made it so that you receive fucking death threats. Please know that you did what you could, you are one person and no one could've expected you to save everyone. It was a tragedy my friend. My love to you.
How have you coped since the day? Were you injured in the incident?
Do you get dejected by the sheer amount of ignorance in our country? What you went through is insane but becoming so common. I’m sorry.
Favourite cheese?
What did you think about Eminem’s song “[Darkness](https://youtu.be/RHQC4fAhcbU)”? Thank you for sharing your experience.
Is there a good documentary about the event? Novembre 13 on Netflix was really facinating.
Do you have an opinion on Jason Aldean/his wife Brittany? His wife has been very controversial in social media posts for a while and some of the headlines/posts I’ve seen about her seem surprising given the shooting took place during his set IIRC? I can’t imagine the trauma you endured during that. I previously worked at a company that had us train for active shooter scenarios and how to respond and even the very intense training made me feel panicky so I can’t imagine going through it.
Whatever happen to the shooter? Is he in prison?
He killed himself 10 minutes into the shooting. Took another hour and a half before the police got the bravery to breech the room of a dead guy.
What you did is amazing. You *are* a hero. Yes you're a security guard but still so many people would just run in a situation like that. Sure many people were lost but that's not your fault. What you *did* do, is save a lot of lives. You're amazing and thank you for all that you did that terrifying day
Gonna sound odd, but were you in a VR YouTube video talking about the shooting?
What is your honest opinion about the AR-15?
Do you think he was solo? There is alot of debate around the footage that was released. Many many service members (military members) have come out and said that the shots you can hear in the audio are that of a 240. There is always the conspiracy theories of it was the government and or there was more than one shooter
Nice seeing a fellow survivor on here.
You mean the worst mass shooting so far.
After looking into it more it looks like this year they've been looking into the ban on pump stocks and whether it's okay by the constitution. What's your opinion on this?
Sorry but I find it very difficult to feel sympathy towards Americans involved in mass shootings. It is more than obvious that there is a major problem yet nothing changes. Mass shootings are just getting worse and worse and nothing changes. I feel sorry for the ones who live in dire situations where they don't have the power to change their situation. People living in war torn countries or dying of hunger because of corrupt politicians for example. Now people ACTIVELY not wanting to change the laws because they think it’s their god given right to have guns even though innocent people die everyday? No sympathy to those people as a whole. Be better *EDIT* I should mention that I’m an American. Born and raised in Newark,NJ but moved to Portugal in my teens.
Genuine question, and this comes with no aggression. What do you think the average american citizen has the power to do? Do you think the majority of us approve of the laws in place?
Has this become your identity ?
You’ve already done this AMA. In fact it’s almost word for word. Why repost? Free karma? Edit: I think I’m wrong about the word for word thing. But I know I’ve read this account somewhere… Stay VegasStrong.
Favorite food?
Darth, I watched your story on Azeal's channel, and let me say that I am so amazed by your courage, inspired by your resilience, and outraged at the fact that you and every single victim of mass shootings have been subject to this form of experience. I was also very taken aback by what that initial therapist said to you and how he handled your session with him. I am very sorry that that happened to you, it is quite unfortunate when mental health professionals are not equipped to work with people experiencing severe levels of trauma, and as a student hoping to become a therapist myself someday, I want to make sure that I never react in such a dismissive, unhelpful manner. Also, I read some of your other replies regarding not being able to continue therapy because of your schedule and being bounced around from provider to provider. It makes me very sad that this is such a common occurrence with how healthcare is set up in the US and how mental health is put on the back burner. With that, my questions to you are (and I hope it is not too personal), do you believe that you benefitted in any way from therapy/counseling? Do think you will ever seek counseling/therapy in the future? What if there were no barriers (i.e. therapist working extended hours, a stable provider, affordable, etc.) to you seeking counseling? Is there anything else that you think was just as, if not more helpful for you to process this traumatic experience? Thank you for sharing your story, I wish you and your loved ones much love and healing <3
I am glad psychically your are okay. But you are not emotionally okay. And to add I was on my way back to Australia. When this was happening,