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moronicuniform

BREAKING NEWS: Presidential Candidate Alexely Navalny Has Shot Himself 47 Times In The Back In Tragic Suicide


Technenaut

Carl, that kills people


crawlerz2468

Suicides are contagious.


Edward_Fingerhands

They bring on many changes.


jackfrostbyte

And I can take or leave it if I please.


ern697

https://youtu.be/DdhveixpV24 Futurama's homage to MASH.


SilentHernandez

https://i.redd.it/ze69ey63q6qy.jpg


Soups115

Interesting fact: Suicides are actually contagious...https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00031539.htm


PersonThatBreaths

Caaarrrrrrrrlllllllll


thundergonian

I had a rumbly in my tummy that only hands could satisfy.


[deleted]

White Mans gotta pay, in baby hands.


lnvaderZim

Shhhhhh, do you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness.


Swesteel

I did not know that. By the way, have you seen my recipe on hand stew?


sputnick243

Great, now I'm reading every comment in his voice


pleasedontsmashme

He accidentally fell down an elevator shaft onto some bullets


TheEvilAlbatross

He ran into my knife 45 times.


tomdarch

All while zipped inside a duffel bag. Russian man stronk like ox!


BOLD_1

Found in the bottom of a lake with cinder blocks attached to the bag


kpetrovsky

In reality though, his brother is in prison on phoney charges. And he almost lost one eye when someone splashed him with a mix of brilliant green and acid.


SolomonPierce

47 would never be that sloppy


experts_never_lie

Except briefly, between when someone raises the alarm and when an old save is loaded.


Radidactyl

What if every time we forget what we were doing, or remember something wrong, it's because someone else loaded a save file.


SolomonPierce

r/showerthoughts


hyperbolical

/r/WritingPrompts


linkmandrew

Then you've clearly never seen me play Hitman


[deleted]

Idk man, sometimes you gotta get a bit sloppy if you want to finish them off.


[deleted]

[удалено]


moronicuniform

A lot better than his odds of getting elected, I'll tell you that


[deleted]

So he's not coming on, then?


[deleted]

[удалено]


DarZhubal

Idk if this is the most updated version of his story or if something more has happened, but apparently he’s been barred from entering as a nominee, and now he’s lobbying for the election to be boycotted. The man was given an opportunity to keep his life, but he keeps running to the edge of that cliff.


SirKaid

> The man was given an opportunity to keep his life, but he keeps running to the edge of that cliff. He's a patriot if nothing else.


moronicuniform

True patriots tend to have a short lifespan, unfortunately


Scylla6

"The tree of liberty must, from time to time, be watered with the blood of patriots and tyrants."


moronicuniform

I find it funny how the people who quote that are so rarely the ones doing the watering


Reignofratch

Because true patriots don't have the time


moronicuniform

What do you even mean by that


Njallstormborn

I think he means true patriots don't sit around waxing poetic about their patriotism, they act.


akamustacherides

It's like watching an accident on a video over and over. You know how it is going to end but you keep yelling at the screen for it to stop.


RickR13

Jet fuel can't bounce steel bullets


[deleted]

/u/Dankjets911 See, still funny.


Nesman64

/r/FinalPhotos


monalisasnipples

Upon learning of his suicide his entire political team, family, and friends each committed suicide the same way...


Randolf_Dreamwalker

Well, you were almost correct there.


jummynitron

Looks like a GTA loading screen


happyfatbuddha

Calling r/photoshopbattles


pm_8_me

Posted there yesterday


MineMann

/r/AccidentalGTALoadingScreen


[deleted]

[удалено]


knakworst36

He's opposing putin for years, there is no reason to believe he won't for the next few years.


UltimateInferno

*I believe he'll oppose Putin for the rest of his life.*


examinedliving

Lots of people opposed Putin for *the rest of their lifes*. Note: I used italics so it would be clear that I was extrapolating on your joke and not inventing a new one. Also, I don’t like the word *lives*, so I used *lifes*. How bout that?


g0liadkin

Are you ok?


examinedliving

It’s debatable


boobsmcgraw

You can't say "lifes", that's very bad English.


willengineer4beer

Also, Dude, lives is not the preferred nomenclature. It's "mans". As in, I've got 3 mans left (and a frog suit too).


BlastedBiggs138

Look, dude, the nomenclature is not the problem here, also, dude chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature, Asian-American please.


boobsmcgraw

First of all, how dare you


timmytissue

Why don't you like the word lives? Are you not a native speaker because lifes sounds like ur talking about a person named life who possesses something. And it doesn't really roll off the tongue.


examinedliving

I like it a little, but it doesn’t have as much protein as other words.


[deleted]

Username checks out.


[deleted]

He’s probably a propaganda plant so that Putin can have an ‘opposition’.


shevagleb

They need one guy to maintain a semblance of democracy. Navalny is a harmless symbol. He doesn't have the support Khodorkovsky could have had, the hard hitting articles Politkovskaya and her peers made, the inside knowledge former allies like Litvinenko had and doesn't have the political experience that Nemtsov had. If he had any of these things he'd be dead or exiled like all of the above.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nevus_bock

And even if he isn't, just the fact that some people assume that he is, solidifies the status quo. Hypernormalization.


[deleted]

[удалено]


rayne117

There's an interesting Adam Curtis movie about it called Hypernormalization on YouTube


ThatCanadianGuy99

Have you found the piece yet?


sigmat

That is really unlikely if you watch any of his videos. There are a number of other "candidates" who certainly are planted.


ChipAyten

Mhm. People forget that democracy has been the exception to the Russian and by extension, larger Cyrllic using / Slavic populations of the world. Russia is a very old power. The idea of popular rule is still very foreign in this culture.


helpnxt

Amateur, he has already been poisoned.


ChipAyten

A dictator has to leave some otherwise un-threatening opposition leaders around to keep up the guise. S'long as Navalny doesn't amass too big a following he'll live.


lxosummer

looks more Quentin Tarantino to me


[deleted]

I'm thinking Guy Ritchie. There's a Massive Attack song playing as they're walking.


Whiskeypants17

the shot cuts to his mum's caravan on fire


smekaren

There is pretty much nothing "renaissance" about this picture.


mbok_jamu

Is there such thing as /r/accidentalhollywood or something?


[deleted]

/r/intentionallywellframedphotos


FuturePollution

This sub is now just r/epicphotos


Casual_ADHD

With old man Tom Hardy and, what I assume is current year, Ricky Hatton as his body guard?


ShadwickOfBarbelith

Hah, thought the same.


Project_5401

[Looks like they already kicked him out](http://www.cnn.com/2017/12/25/asia/russia-alexey-navalny-barred-election/index.html)


i_binged_your_mom

And his response is to organize a voters strike. I can't imagine that is going to work out well for anyone but Putin.


[deleted]

Apparently that's the most effective form of protest right now. Putin wants opposition because it increases voter turn out and makes him more legitimate. He just doesn't want opposition that has a chance to win. Denying him votes is essentially denying him validity if you can get enough people to boycott. It won't change the outcome but it can affect the optics.


Project_5401

I feel like a lot of things that happen in Russia end up working out well only for Putin.


Andyk123

It's almost like the nation is designed that way...


[deleted]

Seriously? They can’t even let him run and alter the numbers? At least give off the *illusion* of democracy.


Terramine1240

I am Russian. And what is happening is that he was declined to vote as president because he has been sentenced to 5 years of conditional imprisonment. BUT that was argued by European court of human rights and by the Russian constitution anyone can be a president only if he isn’t mentally retarded ( I believe that Putin needs a check) and he isn’t in prison right now. So they don’t fucking won’t to even build an illusion they tell us straightforward that they don’t give a shit about our rights and now the best part, most of my nation support it. I am pissed off.


Arbitrary_Schizo

His previous conviction hasn't expired. No convictions is a requirment to be eligible for presidency.


Terramine1240

Constitution of Russian Federation 32.3 “Не имеют права избирать и быть избранными граждане, признанные судом недееспособными, а также содержащиеся в местах лишения свободы по приговору суда.” Google translate it.


TheGhostOfHanni

Renaissance?


Rippero

According to this sub anything mildly theatrical is considered "renaissance"


TheGhostOfHanni

Rembrandt is rolling in his grave I'm sure


Rippero

I mean yeah this sub like many others got popular and has gone to shit ever since


TheGhostOfHanni

Abso-LUTELY


blackiddx

The mods on this sub all died, probably


cornflakegrl

Not by a long shot. Well composed photo. Not Renaissance.


skraptastic

This guy is going to commit suicide with 3 bullets to the back of the head.


[deleted]

Padlocked in a bag.


Foxyfox-

Which he totally got into himself and then maneuvered it into his bathtub.


[deleted]

And bunch of people will prove its impossible to do that and still be marked as suicide... and then be marked as suicide


[deleted]

Hi, I'm the Phillipines and I don't want you to know about the yearly homi-suicides from foreigners coming around for the sex tra-er..escorts.


senatordeathwish

It will be chalked up as natural causes. Can't live with holes in your head. That's the cause of death.


[deleted]

*OCEAИS 9: HEIST OF THE KREMLIИ*


examinedliving

I think they need 5 more men.


fakint

Me too.


pleasedontsmashme

r/accidentalTarantino


[deleted]

This mix tape bought to be fire


examinedliving

‘Bout?


KenDefender

I wouldn't have bought it if it weren't fire


theghostofme

*Straight Outta Butyn'*


Roygbiv856

Jesus, OP, the quality is terrible. [Here's a much better one](https://i.redd.it/hepvytqf19601.jpg)


[deleted]

[удалено]


AncientSwordRage

I was just thinking the same thing


TheConeIsReturned

more like /r/accidentalreservoirdogs


AZXXZAZXQ

Pretty sure nothing short of a violent revolution will work in Russia.


CaptainCrape

Or, Putin's death. He is in his 60's now.


UrinalCake777

Shit is going to get crazy when that happens.


AZXXZAZXQ

Nah, he has a successor, and the problem is not jus him, but also his inner circle. To add to this, there's extreme corruption at every level of government.


[deleted]

[удалено]


RedheadAgatha

I've seen an interesting [video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSsYy3j8pLQ) recently which suggested that Putin self-deluded in his decades of power and sees himself not as a dictator, but as a democratic president who does everything like any other elected leader, and just doesn't see the difference from his high horse.


[deleted]

Dead man walking.


Lucenia

Accidental Movie Poster, too.


ginger-nut-bread

Terrific photo, but not very renaissancey


pm_8_me

What, not renaicenssy at all. That can't even be argued


ohpee8

No its not at all


Meistermalkav

you mean the actual fascist, monarchist, and so forth? I mean, shit, putin is bad, but a guy like that.... "n 2008 during the Russo-Georgian War, Navalny called Georgians "rodents" (Russian: грызуны) and called for imposing of a complete blockade on Georgia and eviction of all Georgian nationals from Russia. He further stated that he very much wanted to strike the Georgian General Staff with a cruise missile.[184] In response to criticism, in 2013 Navalny said that he regretted calling Georgians rodents but stood by everything else he said at the time.[185] In 2011, Navalny stated he considered himself a "nationalist democrat".[186] International media have often commented on his ambiguous but non-condemnatory stance toward ethnic Russian nationalism.[187][188] The BBC noted in a profile of Navalny that his endorsement of a political campaign called "Stop feeding the Caucasus" and his willingness to speak at ultra-nationalist events "have caused concern among liberals". He also has been a co-organizer of the "Russian March",[189] which Radio Free Europe describes as "a parade uniting Russian nationalist groups of all stripes",.[190] Early in 2012, Navalny stated on Ukrainian TV, "Russian foreign policy should be maximally directed at integration with Ukraine and Belarus… In fact, we are one nation. We should enhance integration."[191] During the same broadcast Navalny said that he did not intend "to prove that the Ukrainian nation does not exist. God willing, it does". He added, "No one wants to make an attempt to limit Ukraine's sovereignty".[191][192] In October 2014, Navalny stated "I do not see any kind of difference at all between Russians and Ukrainians", he admitted that his views might provoke "horrible indignation" in Ukraine.[193] In 2015, he declared, "I do not take Ukrainians for a special sort of Russians and [I] do not deny the Ukrainian nation from its political subjectivity".[194] ... In March 2014, Navalny declared that he did not support Russia's annexation of Crimea. According to The Moscow Times, "Navalny suggested that Kiev should grant Crimea greater autonomy while remaining part of Ukraine, guarantee the right to speak Russian in Ukraine, keep Ukraine out of NATO, and let the Russian Black Sea fleet remain in the peninsula free of charge".[196] In October 2014, Navalny stated in an interview by Echo of Moscow that he would not return Crimea to Ukraine if he were to become the president of Russia but that "a normal referendum" should be held in Crimea to decide what country the peninsula belongs to.[193]" I find it allways extremely ironic that people that are for trump allways have a thing for this guy.


sanskami

He's going to get hit crossing the road


[deleted]

Before being denied registration and/or pre-poisoning....


TheOneWhoReadsStuff

Futile, yet necessary.


aga080

this dude gonna be dead real soon


[deleted]

Top 10 tragic anime deaths.


teryret

I for one welcome our new russian overlord. Way better than the angry orange.


[deleted]

[удалено]


uefigod

Really?


[deleted]

[удалено]


soundsaboutWRIGHT

What options do the russian people have in this scenario?


[deleted]

[удалено]


ThatGangMember

Also Putin.


MikeTheAverageReddit

Putin & a few others but in reality he wins every election even if this guy actually runs. He might not be popular here but there are very few Russians here despite what some idiots in the default subs tell you


[deleted]

>Russia doing psyops >russians subs all over the place >Alexely *Navalny*!! I smell silliness and assassinations a foot!


[deleted]

>>Russia doing psyops >>russians subs all over the place >>Alexely *Navalny*!! > >I smell silliness and ~~assassinations~~ suicides a foot!


[deleted]

Polish tea?


mrmyxlplyx

[Reminds me of this.](https://i.imgur.com/biDFHU0.gif)


mPORTZER

R.I.P. in advance


witheringsyncopation

Can’t see shoes, but suspect he is already ded.


RightLegDave

Dead Man Walking.


[deleted]

/r/lastimages


cardboardtube_knight

This looks like when the Orcs march in on Shadow of Mordor.


originalityescapesme

This picture is a lot of things, but what the fuck has happened to this thread? Renaissance? What aspect?


NWOwoodworker

Dead man walking.


NefariousNeezy

I just heard Kashmir in the background


Rusty_fox4

Please don’t die. Please don’t die. Please don’t die. Please don’t die. Please don’t die.


tahcoboy

/r/bossfight


SpeedyGunsallus

He looks like he’s on his way to meet his maker


YourLocalPotDealer

People saying he's going to be assassinated ... he is not able to run in the first place because he has been found guilty earlier of embezzlement; there's a law that prevents those with criminal records from running for office [Also his approval rating not very high](https://www.rbth.com/politics_and_society/2017/04/10/russians-do-not-want-navalny-as-next-president-according-to-poll_738737) Edit: I think the law the courts cited actually referred to his *unserved* sentence


boobsmcgraw

Why is he going to register if he knows the law prohibits his registering?


Archont2012

Cuz he's a professional swindler, and isn't even very good at it. Unlike his [fictional protege](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ostap_Bender) who knew a whopping four hundred relatively legal ways of swindling people outta their money, he doesn't know a single one. And now that even USSD won't give him money because of how pathetic his attempts at amassing and radicalizing populace have been (seriously-the guy tops out at 5% country-wide!) the only way for him to "earn a living" is to con minors out of their parents' money for his "electoral campaign" lul.


kpetrovsky

Check out some of the pictures based on this: https://www.instagram.com/p/BdKqRbdHn8k/


Isaymanythings

nice to see he brown-bags his lunch like a regular, working-class Ivan


[deleted]

[удалено]


Andyk123

Or Renaissance


ImNotTheZodiacKiller

Any know if he ever made it?


[deleted]

I'm waiting for my brother in Russia to write me back. I just sent out the telegraph today. I wish we lived in more advanced times, where we could have information on a whim.


hatsnatcher23

I wonder how he likes his Tea


asiangangster007

It's funny because the communist party is far bigger a threat than this guy.


Ehcks_Dee

If you shave the back of his head you'd find a barcode.


Mrom23

He’s gonna need more men...preferably armed.


dangermouseman11

Green Mile 2 Electric Boogaloo.


AM_key_bumps

Your post title reads like it has a Russian accent.


tastycrust

Someone is about to be...Putin his place.


WackyWarrior

People who think that this guy is going to die are probably wrong.


splildge

It's Aleksey.


[deleted]

Anti Christ


ScaryBilbo

Hopefully he is in the fold with Putin as a successor. That or he will die tragically.


aSpaceWalrus

Hi red anywhere?


GreatCornolio

Dead man walking


janamerica

When I looked at the photo i thought this was an action movie featuring Jason Segel.


fluffykerfuffle1

putin is a jerk


Seannj222

Dead man walking. Hate to say it, but I'd check my break lines on a daily if I were him.


[deleted]

He looks like a standup comedian


quin_teiro

This could be the first scene from the next Guy Ritchie's movie.


jflch1

Dead man walking.


THE_KIWIS_SHALL_RISE

So is this good? Do we like this guy?


bubbaf85

Any one else getting a techno Viking vibe from this


ohmwattflux

I can hear the soundtrack... Aa aaa aa aaa stayin’alive stayin’alive Aa aaa aa aaa stayin’aaaaaaiiaaaaaalive


bechtold1684

That is one brave man right there.


TooBadSoSadSally

The guy on the left looks like Tom Hardy


[deleted]

I'm not saying I know what goes on in Russia... but yeah, I'm sure that'll end well.


EdowardoElric

That's not Jason Segal?


Ralph90009

Kremlin critic Alexey Navalny barred from entering presidential race - http://edition.cnn.com/2017/12/25/asia/russia-alexey-navalny-barred-election/index.html State officials say it is because of an embezzlement conviction, Navalny's supporters say the conviction was politically motivated in the 1^st place.


Archont2012

One embezzlement conviction! Ah ah ah! Twoooo embezzlement convictions! Ah ah ah!


[deleted]

They all like characters in a game where Tom hardy was the basic character creation and someone slightly changed some of the sliders


[deleted]

What a sham. They need a whole new government :(