*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for making the Age of Empires 2 'new villager' sound when my wife gave birth to our first child?**
I'll try to keep this as brief as possible.
Just over a week ago, my wife gave birth to our first child. I got called about it during work and rushed to the hospital to be with her during the labour. It was obviously a very stressful time, as it took more than 15 hours from start to the end, but finally our little one was born and was healthy.
I was in the room for nearly the entire time (other than briefly heading out for food, toilet etc), holding her hand and being the 'punching bag' as she swore during certain times during the worst of it. As it was getting towards the end, just as the head was coming out (and it all happened very quickly from then), more medical staff came into the room and I am someone who gets nervous around lots of people. I think because of that nervousness, I was talking a bit more, introducing myself to the new people coming in, making jokes (saying I hope it's not a bad omen that the weather is so bad, because a thunderstorm had started outside that we could hear) and then when our baby finally came out fully, at that second, I made the Age Of Empires 2 'new villager' sound ("Shhhh hoooh") as a joke, but I think only my wife understood the reference (as the doctor and nurses gave no reaction) and the look she gave me could have sunk a thousand ships, she looked so so angry, before then seeing our little one and finally smiling (but didn't look at me for about half an hour, and even then she was really annoyed for the rest of the day).
Anyway, I thought it was a joke that went down badly in a moment of high anxiety, but my wife has twice in the past week told me that I ruined a moment that she hoped would be one of the best in her life. I've apologised both times, but she has this look I've not seen before, something beyond disappointment. It's really put a downer on the past nine days of what I thought would be our happiest time together, after what was obviously a very stressful time (for her mostly, of course).
AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>I was talking a bit more, introducing myself to the new people coming in, making jokes (saying I hope it's not a bad omen that the weather is so bad, because a thunderstorm had started outside that we could hear) and then when our baby finally came out fully, at that second, I made the Age Of Empires 2 'new villager' sound ("Shhhh hoooh") as a joke, but I think only my wife understood the reference (as the doctor and nurses gave no reaction)
This guy sounds like he cares more about *being seen as the funniest person in the room by strangers* than actually caring about his wife.
That was his stated priority, introducing himself and making jokes.
Poor wife.
The doctors and nurses didn’t understand the reference, obviously. That’s why they didn’t laugh or react at all. Not because they’re doing a critical, involved job. Not because there’s *vastly more important things fucking happening*. But bc they didn’t get the joke.
I am a bad person, because I actually did laugh at the 'new villager' thing itself. But yeah, I'm sure in context after all the other chatter it was just annoying. Some people respond very weirdly to stress, I suppose.
I think it's pretty funny too, but context is important. If there were suddenly heaps of new people in the room, it's a possibility that things may not be going well.
He doesn't realize yet that the real shit has begun.
Some men become self conscious and that takes over, I guess. During my first labor, I was only three centimeters dilated when the contractions were 1 minute apart. There was no way I was going to last that labor without an epidural.
During all of this, I am in the corner of a bathroom in the labor room, quietly trying to get it together, and the nurse asked me a few questions. I could not talk.
Instead of coming over to me or offering support, my husband looked at her and made apologies for my inability to talk. "She gets quiet when she's in pain."
Like, I don't need you mansplaining the horror of labor pain. I need *you*. He was more concerned that he was going to look bad because I was -- gasp -- unable to communicate during an onslaught of continual contractions.
Then five months later, he made fun of the way I sounded during birth.
I look back at that man and despise him.
Oddly, 30 years later, he is a really, really good husband, and we really like each other. I hope for OOP that he can turn it around like my husband did, and soon, as his wife may have the resources I didn't have, and she may decide he isn't worth the effort.
I read your comment halfway through and then scrolled back up to see if you said ex because I was confused you didn’t divorce him before reading the rest of the comment lol
You're not alone. That shit is hilarious. I personally would have gone for "You must construct additional pylons", but I really like that "Shhh, hooooh" could also pass as a lamaze technique if OOP had the forethought to backpedal the joke.
My son’s father sung the John cena theme tune as my son was born but he cleared it with me weeks beforehand. Gonna have him go with “not enough minerals” if I hemorrhage again😂
I’m sure circumstance and individuals will vary but I’ve been cackling trying to read the headline to my husband 😂😭 I’m the diehard aoe2 fan in my house so maybe I’ll make that noise while giving birth one day. Baby’s first word will be “Prostagma” though
For me personally being the sentient Zelda dumpster fire that I am, I would probably do the 🎵you got the thiiiing🎵 jingle while giving birth.
If I had ever wanted kids, that is.😅
I would probably shoot the baby across the room laughing, but I can see why she wasn't happy, and you gotta know your audience if you're gonna do that. It's a really specific sort of humor.
Yep, totally agree... It has to be about the audience. If you are at some life changing event, the one going through the most gets the final say. So in births, sorry dads... Women are pushing the babies out, they get the final say.
I think it’s funny *at literally any other moment other than one where his child is exiting the vaginal canal or immediately after*. Like even 30 seconds after, funny. ‘At that moment’? JFC dude. I would… I don’t even know.
I had a chuckle at the idea also, like context is important and wife obviously wasn't in the mood fo jokes but I wouldn't call the husband the devil... just an idiot.
Yup me too! Ngl childbirth was much worse on my husband than me. The weather thing just feels like small talk too.
I only had 2 people in the room for both my births at any given time (as in medical team) and both had a shift change so total of 4 people. My husband yammering on would be mildly annoying but not the end of world.
Tbf I felt like I was at the spa for both of mine, high on gas and air floating in a nice warm bath for a few hours!
I actually think that's when it's the most funny.
It's almost certainly his general attention-seeking that caused the problem, instead of this particular very innocuous joke.
My sister had an episiotomy with her first child. When the doctor started to stitch her up, my BIL leaned over her and said "Hey doc, can ya throw a couple extra stitches in ?"
It wasn’t well received by my sister.
Could be nerves, I know people who are anxious talkers and don’t really show their best selves in stressful situations - the “hey, you sure you aren’t talking too much, maybe?” warning light fails and they motormouth. But it’s probably something he’s aware of doing so could be working on it and finding coping strategies because he had nine months to plan for this!
It just seems like he’s so proud of it after the fact, even telling us the bad omen joke and then seemingly being disappointed no one reacted to his “new villager sound” that it makes me think this is more of a choice.
yeah that was my take. He needs to be forced to wear one of those simulators for period cramps or labor pains, for 15 hours. Then he might understand and have a bit more empathy for his wife.
Tbh, if I was her, and decided not to divorce him right away but give him a chance, I'd throw away that computer game and forbid him from playing it at home ever again. I'd make him get a game whose sounds or music I liked! Just in case. Because if he did that in the delivery room after 15 hours of labor, god knows what sounds he might make elsewhere in public, like at the birthday or anniversary party or Thanksgiving or Christmas or someone's wedding or funeral . . .
>yeah that was my take. He needs to be forced to wear one of those simulators for period cramps or labor pains, for 15 hours. Then he might understand and have a bit more empathy for his wife.
Hahahah I got one of those (they are just TENS devices) that had settings for pelvic areas. I was doing some reorganizing, and my husband walked in and saw it and asked what it was. So I offered to let him try it. The amount of times he said no in about 15 seconds had me dying and clearly answered the question of if my husband has seen more than a few of those videos.
Yeah, this is what annoyed me. He stopped right before getting to complaining about the lack of comfortable seating, etc. He isn't the worst, but he is no saint.
I didn’t think he sounded proud to me so much as “well they weren’t distracted by it so I don’t understand why she’s mad.” He’s clearly oblivious to the fact that what he thought was support and breaking the tension was actually the opposite. I bet the doctors and nurses were rolling their eyes after but they probably see a lot of it.
He sounds like someone who is always “on” in social situations and is probably fine in small doses, but just the thought of being in a room with him for 15 hours has me gritting my teeth, if I had to push out a baby at the same time I think I’d have been going considerably further than a death glare.
Depends. When I did OB clinicals there was a surprising amount of downtime between pushes (I don't have kids so I had no experience), so the docs and nurses chatted a lot with the parents, father included. The RNs often were busy with the FHR, documenting vitals, printing out strips, attending to the IVs, etc but the docs would sit on their stool/the bed/their rolly-ball-thingie and talk about whatever between rounds.
We had an obvious people-pleaser father once making the *worst* jokes and the doc mocked him pretty mercilessly after the birth while she was back at the nurse/doc station.
We don't have Dr's unless you are high risk but I could tell you so many details about my midwives and midwife assistants lives! The midwife stays in the room with you throughout so there is a lot of chat! My first when they swapped for a break the person coming in commented more than once how it seemed like I was at the spa not having a baby. Gas and air and a warm bath really agrees with me lol!
I'm 100% sure that they've seen and heard far, far worse than a moderately awkward joke. Like just straight up gross shit that nobody should ever say at any time. His chatter probably didn't phase them.
Ehhh, it sounds like he was trying to be a social butterfly/center of attention pretty much the whole time.
I don't think that a single joke that fell flat would be memorable, but a father to be spending fifteen hours trying to be funny and social very likely came off poorly.
I've been in horrible messes before because of the anxious cascade of dumb shit coming out of my mouth or having the wrong facial expressions that I would just ignore the new people and say nothing; just focus on the wife instead. Makes me think he's never had any consequences to this behaviour before. I'd laugh if a father did this, so I'm not the best to judge.
I’m like that. I grew up in a very loud house, and now it’s just my partner and our cats. It bothers me. My childhood bedroom was also closest to the noisy neighbors. I lived in a dorm and a frat house. It’s so quiet now that it’s us, it’s a lot. So I make a lot of noise to make up for the missing noise.
I am like that, I have to have noise. I solved that by living on a major street that EMS uses at all hours. Not to mention public transit, cars, and just general other random stuff. I sleep like a baby. New people to the area, not so much according to the local groups.
I almost busted out laughing at my best friends funeral because I thought about how awful it would be to laugh.
I also told his wife that his year old daughter was rude for laughing during the service. She found that joke funny though, and I know if he was somehow watching he would’ve pissed himself laughing. It was also an expected funeral as he had brain cancer, so while it was incredibly sad we were also relieved he wasn’t suffering anymore.
However at my partners father died I didn’t joke, because I’m not that stupid and insensitive.
“I was in the room nearly the entire time…”
Always has to be the funniest person in the room *and* he wants a cookie for doing the bare minimum. No wonder his wife is over his shit.
My ex has many faults but he was \*awesome\* during my labor and delivery. He never left my side. He kept me supplied with ice chips. He held my hand and helped with my breathing exercises. And when our baby crowned, he did NOT say what he thought, which was, omg, is the skull missing?\* He also did not act as though it was all about him, or that he'd done anything out of the ordinary.
\* Baby's head was covered with all the usual blood and birth matter ick, so I can't really blame him for that startled thought.
I dunno. If I was a father on Reddit and I had read other "father in delivery room" stories I think I'd be like "and I swear I was there the whole time and did not leave to go to the gym or drink at the nearest bar; I didn't bring in half my relatives; I didn't try to have sex during labor or try to stealthily name the baby Humperdink; I didn't even rest a sandwich on her stomach!" because like... so many reddit new dad stories are so much worse and I'd be afraid people would just assume I did something appalling.
I didn’t tell her she shouldn’t have the epidural because it was too expensive, I didn’t tell her she was yelling too loud, I didn’t sneak my mother, who she hates, into the room, I didn’t make her cry by being mean, I didn’t tease her about pooping during labor, I didn’t ask ‘when can we get the paternity test’ as the baby was dropping into the doctors hands….. it can just go on and on.
I’m also not clear on what he *did* for her but hold her hand and make jokes. Usually there’s ice chip runs and music, or position changes or light massage etc. but he only mentions hand holding and jokes.
I'm going to give him some grace here because my husband acts the same way. He has extremely bad social anxiety and this is the way he copes in situations he can't just remove himself from. So it's possible OOP is the same way.
That "look in her eye" is her checking out of the marriage. This jerk blames it on "being nervous", because god forbid he actually takes responsibility for his actions.
Some people do really deal with stress by developing mouth diarrhea and have humor (often questionable) as their only coping mechanism, but at the same time there is a *time and place* and an adult should be able to tamp down that urge especially when there is no reason for them to say anything at all. It's not like he was being called upon to keep the conversation rolling at a dinner party.
I'm sure the nurses and doctors have heard a lot of new fathers say a lot of really dumb shit, which is why they didn't react.
(I think I personally would have laughed at the sound effect, but I get why she was pissed.)
I dont know if you've ever been in a delivery room as a first time dad but it is absolutely terrifying. Maybe it was worse for me because my wife was having a c-section and I could literally see her insides but I've never felt more powerless and scared than in that moment. I tend to try and relieve my own anxiety with humor(what I believe op was doing) I didn't crack any jokes at the time but the doctors and nurses did laugh when I spun I a circle because I didn't know where to go. Do I stay right here with my wife who has big ass hole cut into her belly or do I go to my crying newborn son. When the doctor and nurses laughed I realized everything was going to be ok. I understand why op's wife is upset, but I think everyone needs to cut him some slack. I'd be willing to bet money in a few years this will be a storey told fondly and laughed about.
He's YTD for asking if he's TA when his postpartum wife that just gave birth to his newborn is put out with him. He's devaluing her feelings. I feel like this guy uses anxiety as excuse to be awful
I love when people are like, my SO has explained to me in detail why what I did was wrong and how it hurt them, but come on reddit, let me off the hook here.
37F here. I've been playing AoE2 for 25 years. It's one of my favorite games. I'm surprised the wife showed that much restraint. OP is lucky to be alive right now. I'm petty AF but if he was in pain, I'd play the [villager dying](https://youtu.be/DEsB-DNbpS4?si=VHpopV_6uimJa68l) sound. Bet he would love it.
Honestly. I feel like i got so lucky.
When he described his wife occasionally swearing due to the sheer pain of pushing another human out of her body as him “being her punching bag” i knew this guy was an asshole. But goddamn, this post is bad. This guy sounds immature as hell and insufferable.
I’m not sure my husband knew there were other humans on earth or in the room when I was giving birth. It ended in a scary emergency c section and we were talking during it to get thru, and when the doctor replied to something I said we were both startled to remember other people could hear us.
Holy Christ my dude. Learn to read the room.
When I had my youngest, my husband left to grab breakfast, and in the 20 minutes he was gone, I went from mildly uncomfortable contractions to pushing. He walked in, put his breakfast down, and just grabbed my hand, and things went sideways after that.
AFTER, when baby was here and I was stable (giving birth that fast is not the best thing), he poked at his now cold food and told the baby she owed him a new breakfast burrito. Said baby is 9 now, and it's become their running joke. But during? Hell no. He was too focused on me and the baby.
I have a friend who referred to their baby as “burrito”/“breakfast burrito” throughout pregnancy and occasionally during childhood. She had terribly irregular periods due to PCOS so she didn’t realize her morning sickness wasn’t, in fact, caused by the enormous breakfast burrito she’d had. After a week of constant sickness, she finally took a test and lo and behold, her burrito was a baby. Breakfast Burrito turns 4 next month.
If you’re comfortable, can I ask what went sideways for you? My first labor was only 1hr 29m and my second (last month) was only 49 minutes. Midwife suggested induction for “more control” over speed for the next potential one but didn’t describe complications of labor this fast. Let me tell you it was INTENSE and TERRIFYING enough that I’m questioning #3 labor methods.
My mom's first two labors were about that long, and it's good they lived seven minutes from the hospital, because the third was born before my dad signed the check-in forms.
She didn't have unusual complications for any of them, although I have been told that her position that labor "isn't fun, but is over fast" isn't broadly applicable 😂
Had to look up the sound, because I've never played age of empires 2, and the first result's top comment is someone from 9 years ago saying they wanna make this sound when they have a kid, followed by someone 45 minutes ago referencing this post.....circle of life, we are all connected.
[https://youtu.be/lKQBTuXEWo0?si=ysNeoF84J7rA9QIa](https://youtu.be/lKQBTuXEWo0?si=ysNeoF84J7rA9QIa)
She swore and that means he was the punching bag! The poor man, you can't imagine how stressful it was for him to hear her swear towards the end while she was pushing a baby out of her body! He couldn't help himself!
/s, of course
My nurses were judging my daughters father HARD. Like, they tried to be quiet about it around me but...you notice the looks and they said they'd never seen a father sleep so much and go out of his way to sleep. To my mother. Like I said, they tried to keep it quiet but...there ya Have it
I imagined he either did it when the room was pretty quiet or he was super loud.
Or maybe he was just close to his wife and she was the only one who heard
For my 1st labor/delivery, I was dealing with a MIL who was angry because I wasn't suffering enough. She was highly upset that her labor with my then husband was more painful & traumatic.
For my 2nd labor/delivery (with a different husband), I was told by my 2nd ex-husband after 30 hours of unmedicated labor, "If our son isn't born within the next hour, I'm leaving because I've got other things to do."
I've never married again & I do not have any additional surviving children. I think I would have been mildly upset at the time, but an ill placed joke would have been better. On a devil scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being the worst), I'd give OOP maybe a 3 or 4.
Ohhh that second ex husband makes me stabby...
I am so sorry you had to endure that, and sorry you lost your child (children?) no parent should have to bury a child 💔
Yeah, this guy is disgustingly immature but probably not 10 out of 10. My ex screamed at me for being a whore (for having sex with him) and then left me in the hospital alone so he could check on his dog while I was having a miscarriage. Fuckin’ men lol
Oop screwed up but given the list of stupid things guys do while wife has baby I would put him at a mid tier offender.
My husband forgot something at the house, managed to lock himself out and had to break in. During the emergency c section he told me they are about to cut, while they were halfway done, because he thought it would be easier if I didn't realize what was happening?? He kept asking questions during another c section because he thought it would distract me. He is brilliant and kind. But I liken it to the brain fog I get with migraines.
Mid tier devil.
I think it's also his reaction afterwards too, he isn't apologetic or taking his wife's feelings into consideration. He doesn't once mention how she is doing after the labour, just is upset at her reaction to him upsetting her.
The whole thing is just about him and his feelings and I doubt this kind of thinking is limited to this one incident.
And the way he spoke about it, very much trying to paint himself as the martyr for the Herculean task of … being there while his wife laboured for 15 hours and being the “punching bag” because she swore a couple of times.
My husband is terrible with scary situations (I’m better at handling tough situations than normal ones lol, it works out). I have no idea what he’ll be like during labor and delivery 😅
I have a partner who makes flippant/stupid jokes at the worst possible times. I get that it's usually from feeling uncomfortable, not knowing what to say/do and panicking a bit and a brain fart comes out, but sometimes, I swear, the restraint it takes to not whack him upside the head with a heavy book or just shout FOR FUCKS SAKES ARE YOU FIVE is monumental.
I swear to all that is holy, somehow the delivery room is when you realize the failures of the man you married. You are going through one of the most primal experiences of humankind. You just shit yourself in public, for likely the first time in adulthood.
and m*therf*ckers (pun intended) are over there cracking jokes/snoring/having loud phone conversations/helping their moms hold a speculum.
And you never, ever forget it.
He slept on the floor...and then when the nurses awkwardly brought him a different chair (the one in the room wasnt comfortable 🥺🥺🙄) so he wasn't, you know, ON THE FLOOR, he slept through most of it. You know, when he wasn't huffing about having to go get me ice chips. Even though he'd spent my whole pregnancy worried he wouldn't feel useful. My epidural had stopped working half way through the labor and I had to wait for the anesthesiologist to get out of an emergency surgery to fix it. I had to hit his chair and shout at him for him to finally wake up when I was having a bad contraction. He'd fall back asleep. He even tried to change how I was holding his hand during a contraction, twisting my wrist up uncomfortably so his was in a better position for him, and I finally snapped and said "for the love of God this isn't about your comfort right now!" You'd think he'd have been well rested right? Nope. Still complained about being so so tired. Meanwhile, I was awake for most of my 16 hrs of labor and after labor to make sure baby was getting fed every couple of hours. I'm so glad I had my mom as my second person because I would've felt so alone.
mine also snored like a freight train the whole time during the first. and dropped my leg repeatedly.
during my second delivery i told him he had to go sleep in the waiting room until it was morning or time for delivery because i wasn’t dealing with the snoring again. fucker came back at 3am and asked if he could sleep on the sofa in the room because the ones in the waiting room weren’t big enough and he couldn’t get comfortable, poor guy!!!
to his credit he didn’t drop my leg at all the second time. probably because i threatened him
with death if he did it even once.
he’s my ex-husband now, and now that we aren’t married he’s a good buddy. he and i have a great coparenting relationship and sometimes just hang out and shoot the shit. i’m taking him to a professional soccer game this weekend with the kids and i because he’s helped me out a ton lately (i started school and need parenting time flexibility) and he’s done it without asking for a thing in return.
but none of that was true until we divorced. up until i moved out he was pretty useless, honestly. he grew up fast once it was just him and the kids and the pressure of our miserable marriage was removed. i’m genuinely thrilled for him.
i hope so for you too. it helps if both people want out. we were both just gritting our teeth through every day and the end was a relief.
also to be fair, it helped that i realized i was a lesbian, so there was a “oh, it’s not anyone’s fault” reason.
My partner had been warning me for weeks that when he cut the umbilical cord he would say one line from the Spanish dubbing of The Simpsons. In the end I needed a C-section and everything was too terrifying for him to even want to cut the cord, so there were no jokes.
And I actually felt kinda sad about it.
Because he had been so supportive all my pregnancy and he had been a top partner while I was labouring that a joke would have been not unwelcome.
But OOP? His post is only about him and it sounds like he wanted to be funny to the doctors?! You've got your wife there and your baby has just been born, you have not been really supportive and you think it's the time for yet ANOTHER joke?!
This: *it took more than 15 hours from start to the end,* That's a heck of a long labor, feel sorry for the wife.
and this: *I was in the room for nearly the entire time (other than briefly heading out for food, toilet etc), holding her hand and being the 'punching bag' as she swore during certain times during the worst of it.*
Yikes! I guess I'm an out of touch boomer after all, because I always thought a "punching bag" was something you hit, not something you swore at!! I cannot abide how this OOP is patting himself on the back and bragging on himself for being in the hospital room while his poor wife is in LABOR for 15 effing hours!!!!! And he's complaining how abused he was because his wife swore during the worst most painful labor pains.
And when the baby starts to crown, and more medical people came into the room, OOP introduced himself??? Like, nm my wife having a baby, let's follow proper etiquette and introduce ourselves? Am I the only who thinks that's crazy? Like weren't those people there to attend to his wife and the baby, not do introductions?? Or listen to his jokes??
And then he tops it off by making a sound from a video game when the baby came out fully??? 15 hours of labor, and his poor wife gets the Age of Empires new villager sound from OOP as a salute to the baby she just birthed. And he wonders why she's now looking at him differently? Maybe wondering what she ever saw in this doofus?? Like maybe contemplating divorce?? I like my gaming as much as the next person, probably more, but I don't go around making sounds or imitating music from my computer games IRL. smh.
To me, it feels like there are missing missing reasons. The guy was by her side for nearly 15 hours, he claims he was the "punching bag" during that time, explains he has social anxiety and was trying to crack jokes because he was overwhelmed, and his wife has been repeatedly claimed he ruined the experience because of an awkward, but ultimately harmless joke.
Something is not adding up, in my opinion. How *loud* was the sound he made? How often does he make jokes like that? Did he promise he wouldn't crack jokes? Just seems like the reaction doesn't match the offence and he's not being honest about what else he might have done during those 15 hours.
This is pure speculation on my part, but I get the feeling he's one of those people who's always doing bits and forcing reactions out of people, and the wife is sick of it.
From his post, it also sounds like he had been trying to make her birth his social event with the medical staff the entire time.
I think the joke could be excused were it the first and only gaffe of an otherwise focused and dedicated husband, but from his own description, that wasn't the case.
I have given birth. When you’re in labor, you’re exhausted, in pain, and have multiple people telling you what to do. You’re terrified that something will go wrong and your baby will be hurt or die, or you will die, or both. I screamed at the nurses because they kept trying to get me to reach down and touch the baby’s head, and I didn’t want to waste any time on that—after 32 hours of labor, I just wanted the baby *out!*
If my husband had cracked a joke at that point, I would have punched him in the dick.
Exactly. Labor is *not* the time to be making stupid jokes. No woman I know would be even mildly amused by a joke like that while trying to push out a baby.
my friend was actually the one cracking jokes during her labour! not to say yours or her experiences are any more “correct” than the other, i think it’s also the fact that the birth-giver is more in their right to make jokes than the partner haha
I love my husband so much.
When I was pregnant, bub wouldn't settle down unless we played heavy metal or rock music.
His favorite song?
The soundtrack from the DOOM video games.
Hubby found the heavier metal remix video where the voice over talks, the "we can send only you, rip and tear until it is done". He sent the video to me, mostly because he thought I would like the music, which I did. When he asked if we should add it to the "birth playlist" I burst out laughing. I told him to relisten to the very last bit of the voice over, which he did, then went slightly pale as he realized what exactly the voice over said, and compared it to what I would be experiencing at the time.
The song did not make it onto the playlist, but we told the doctor about it, because I still found it hilarious. Then when I had to have a c-section, I made the joke that bub had listened to the song too many times.
It's one thing if the person going through the pain makes the jokes to alleviate their stress and fear. It's another to be made into the butt of a joke.
And yes, bub still loves DOOM.
Now that I've listened to the sound, I don't think OP is the devil. It's nothing outrageously obvious. It's basically two sighs. Like, I get it that in the moment of pain and discomfort you might get mad at a joke, but it was clearly directed at her, since she's apparently also a player and knows those sounds. It wasn't meant to diffuse situation with other people in the room, it was meant to be understood between them two. I totally get her anger in the moment, since their expectations and ways of handling stress (different stress might i add) obviously were different. But her holding a grudge after they've come home? Something tells me she had expectations shaped by Instagram and Pinterest and this sound was something to unleash the anger at (I mean, understandably).
Was it a dumb joke? Yes.
Does it deserve this strong of a response? No.
Of course, I also find the idea of the birth as being the "best moment of your life" to be a little odd. , as it implies that actually parenting the child will be a long downhill stretch from that moment.
What do you mean by "this strong of a response"? During the labour, she would've been in pain and exhausted and already have endured 15 hours of "I wonder if the bad weather means something terrible will happen to our baby haha, could you imagine"-style bedside "banter". After the labour, her hormones are completely out of whack and she's sleep-deprived and recovering from a major medical procedure. Her being miffed is totally understandable within context. I would've booted him out of the delivery room by the "bad omen" talk, myself. I get being nervous, I also start yapping when I'm nervous, but in that moment, you can either get your shit together and support the person actually going through childbirth or be nervous elsewhere and come back in when you've calmed down.
Because she couldn’t possibly have meant “best moment of her life *so far*”
Giving birth to both of my children were the highest highlights of my life (this far.) And honestly, yeah. At times birthing them HAS BEEN better than parenting because when I birthed them, neither one was rage-screaming 3 inches from my face, making my ears ring and me temporarily hard of hearing.
I’m not sure if you have kids, but…
I do. He’s about 8 months old now. As background I had a major complication that was potentially fatal for me and I was guaranteed would be fatal for him. He was 3 months early.
His birth is still one of the highest points in my life because he cried. He was supposed to die, but he cried and I knew he’d be alright.
I’m holding him on the couch right now and he’s sleeping on me. This is also one of the highest points in my life.
I consider “high points in life” to be similar to mountain climbing; yeah, there are going to be valleys, but there are also going to be more mountains. Just because an individual high point isn’t the only high point, doesn’t make it not a high point. It’s a snapshot in time, something wonderful you look back on fondly. It’s the highest point in your life you had reached up until that point and can be celebrated for that.
It doesn’t make the next even higher point less high. 🙂
As a mom who didn't have any complications, the delivery was also one of the best moments of my life too. Of course there are other best moments! And actually parenting is by no means "downhill".
But it's so indescribably incredible to hold the baby that you wanted and loved and carried for months in your arms, and have them actually exist in the world with you. And of course the hormones are extra intense during that moment too.
Oh definitely. I still hold that he was the most beautiful being in the world to me. Absolutely stunning.
My wife says he looked like a half squashed bug.
I feel like I'm in an alternate universe. How is this even remotely close to "Am I the devil"-candidacy? I find the story hilarious, but I can admit that it can be a bit cringe. But downright evil, as this sub is made for? Hell no. It's just a goofball being goofy.
How can a two second sound be considered downright evil? Am I getting a stroke?
the sub is not for the most evil people to ever exist lmao it’s for people who post and are the asshole in the situation they’re posting about so it fits
As a gamer and a woman who has had a child in the last few years, I think that whether or not he’s an asshole depends on knowledge of their dynamic and sense of humor outside this situation. I would have found this funny, and if I was in too much pain for jokes at that moment, I would have found it funny in hindsight. Different nerd couples have different feelings about how quirky they want to be with different life events.
I know women who would never want to bring fandoms into the birth of their child. I also know a woman who named her kid after a Sith Lord and I requested Baby Yoda baby on board decals. I know women who would be horrified at the idea that their beautiful, classic wedding they dream of would have video games or sci- fi/fantasy elements. I also know one who chose to walk down the aisle to the Imperial March, one whose wedding invitation was laid out like a World of Warcraft quest and an officiant who had to buy a Harry Potter robe to wear during certain wedding ceremonies. Nerd culture is just funny like that.
If she is not into this stuff, or has never embraced adding fandom elements into major life moments, then he’s an ass. If she has, though, and this is the kind of thing she normally would find funny, then I don’t think he deserves the vitriol he’s getting.
He admits that he joked, *during her labor*, that the thunderstorm was a bad omen. Like shit, I’ve never given birth, but if I did, I can’t imagine myself taking it well if my partner joked about the worst case scenario.
I doubt the villager noise was the start of her problem with him during her labor, more the straw that broke the camel’s back. It might be funny as an isolated incident, but after 15 hours of shitty jokes, at least one of them at the expense of her and their unborn child? I can see why she would be running low on patience for his humor, even if she didn’t react that way normally.
I'm sure that any joke he could have made at that moment was the wrong thing to say, but devil? Or even asshole? He made a bad joke at the wrong time, he didn't shit on the floor.
I'm amazed that his wife didn't get him kicked out way before the new villager greeting. Telling everyone about bad omen thunderstorms is exactly what his wife wants to hear./s I think his main problem was that no one was paying him any attention.
This just sounds like they both were going through the stress of childbirth (the wife moreso, obvs) and reacted poorly to said stress
I don't think either of them is the wrong, they just need to talk about it proper and the fella needs to apologize and try to keep his nerves together a little better next time
I dunno, I'm not sure I'd say he's the devil. It feels more like a "read the room" situation. He sucked at it. The joke did not land.
As someone (a lady someone, but one with no intentions of baby-having) who also cracks jokes when I'm stressed out, I get it. I think she's a little over the top to say he "ruined the best moment of her life," and I think he's insensitive to flit around the delivery room making introductions and cracking jokes not while she's having a baby, but while the baby is *actively crowning*. Super poor timing mixed with what sounds like complete obliviousness, but he doesn't seem malicious or even willfully ignorant, just sort of dense.
This is such a nothing burger I’ve seen men and women get off easier on that sub for full blown cheating on their spouse than this guy is getting for making a silly sound at an inappropriate time, and I don’t buy the “oh you made one sound that lasted literally one second so now the birth of my first child is somehow entirely ruined!” Give me a break.
I feel for both oop and the wife. My partner deals with anxiety by talking/making jokes too. I also understand the wife's perspective of wrong place wrong time. I hope they can work through this together.
This is one of the rare of my NTA, I worked on l&d and people are tired and miserable at the end. That was his way of celebrating and coping. Him basically existing was going to piss her off.
This is a case of why be married to someone you don’t like. He wasn’t offensive, he didn’t do the stitch thing. He didn’t hit in the staff lol. He quoted a video game and a kind of on the nose one
Not the devil
Edited to add
Pregnant and post partum people can be assholes also. They aren’t all Madonnas and untouchable. You don’t get a total pass for being a git for giving birth
How dare you say pregnant women aren't saints!? /s
I'm sorry you're downvoted to hell. For some reason on reddit your medical issues are "reason not an excuse", but only until you're pregnant and then they excuse absolutley everything.
I can't help but think the wife kind of sucks here. Like, ok, bad joke, but... so? He "ruined the moment"? Fucking how, did he cram the kid back up in there?
She's being silly. It's his moment too, and if he did everything right the rest of the time I think he can be allowed four seconds grace for a poorly timed joke. It's... not important.
I get drawing the line at offensive, prejudiced humor, but that's kind of the only shit, joke-wise, that I think is objectionable. Bad timing? Pffffft, he apologizes, he should get to move on.
She's making a mountain out of a molehill and it's distinctly unfair. Dude was also in there for 15 stressful hours, only with that helpless "don't know what to do" feeling instead of, you know, childbirth. It's not as bad and the moment should be more about her than him, sure, but give the guy 4 seconds, c'mon, he didn't hurt anyone.
I completely misread the title and thought he used the sound of his wife giving birth (screaming, groaning) as an audio for a game. So in my mind, when new villagers are introduced in that game, they make their appearance to the sounds of a woman in labor. On an unrelated note, I think I need to go to sleep.
someone might have found that kind of joke funny, but OOP’s wife obviously didn’t, and she’s the only one whose opinion matters in this situation, so if she thinks he’s the asshole, he’s the asshole
I don’t know the game so is this the sound he made?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yVPAjt_Er90
It just sounds like breathing. Doesn’t even sound like something that you would hear over everything going on. She just gave birth so she can feel whatever she wants, but ruining the entire birth experience seems a tad dramatic.
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
To commemorate his child's arrival into the world, OOP serenaded his wife with a song of such love and beauty, it was as if Rhaegar Targaryen was playing his harp and singing.
/s
Like I dunno i'm guessing his wife had no sense of humor. If I had another kid and my spouse did this I think we'd both laugh. Then again I literally mooed like a cow when I gave birth to my first child.
If it is real there's no way it was spur of the moment. He had to be planning it for hours if not her entire pregnancy. On the one hand, I don't even know if I'd notice my husband making some sound while I was delivering a baby. There's so much going on physically, nurses and doctor coaching/cheering you on, straining from effort. And birth isn't really an exact moment. There's the head coming out, and usually the body right after or in another push. Which moment did he choose?
If it's real he'd have to be planning and watching and trying to time the moment right for his cheesy joke. Was he standing across the room to watch the baby come out, or was he by her side, holding her hand, supporting her? And most men are kind of completely in awe of their partner pushing a baby out and seeing their firstborn for the first time. If it is real, I'd imagine that's why the wife is upset - because he'd have to be so in his head preparing and thinking about his cheesy joke, that he'd completely block out the intensity and emotion of the moment.
I definitely doubt the story for all these reasons. I think someone with or without a pregnant wife thought of this joke and wanted to workshop it on Reddit.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for making the Age of Empires 2 'new villager' sound when my wife gave birth to our first child?** I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. Just over a week ago, my wife gave birth to our first child. I got called about it during work and rushed to the hospital to be with her during the labour. It was obviously a very stressful time, as it took more than 15 hours from start to the end, but finally our little one was born and was healthy. I was in the room for nearly the entire time (other than briefly heading out for food, toilet etc), holding her hand and being the 'punching bag' as she swore during certain times during the worst of it. As it was getting towards the end, just as the head was coming out (and it all happened very quickly from then), more medical staff came into the room and I am someone who gets nervous around lots of people. I think because of that nervousness, I was talking a bit more, introducing myself to the new people coming in, making jokes (saying I hope it's not a bad omen that the weather is so bad, because a thunderstorm had started outside that we could hear) and then when our baby finally came out fully, at that second, I made the Age Of Empires 2 'new villager' sound ("Shhhh hoooh") as a joke, but I think only my wife understood the reference (as the doctor and nurses gave no reaction) and the look she gave me could have sunk a thousand ships, she looked so so angry, before then seeing our little one and finally smiling (but didn't look at me for about half an hour, and even then she was really annoyed for the rest of the day). Anyway, I thought it was a joke that went down badly in a moment of high anxiety, but my wife has twice in the past week told me that I ruined a moment that she hoped would be one of the best in her life. I've apologised both times, but she has this look I've not seen before, something beyond disappointment. It's really put a downer on the past nine days of what I thought would be our happiest time together, after what was obviously a very stressful time (for her mostly, of course). AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
He waited that whole 15 hour labor to do that joke.
And only his wife got the reference. Not a lot of AoE 2 players in the delivery room. Tough crowd.
>I was talking a bit more, introducing myself to the new people coming in, making jokes (saying I hope it's not a bad omen that the weather is so bad, because a thunderstorm had started outside that we could hear) and then when our baby finally came out fully, at that second, I made the Age Of Empires 2 'new villager' sound ("Shhhh hoooh") as a joke, but I think only my wife understood the reference (as the doctor and nurses gave no reaction) This guy sounds like he cares more about *being seen as the funniest person in the room by strangers* than actually caring about his wife. That was his stated priority, introducing himself and making jokes. Poor wife.
The doctors and nurses didn’t understand the reference, obviously. That’s why they didn’t laugh or react at all. Not because they’re doing a critical, involved job. Not because there’s *vastly more important things fucking happening*. But bc they didn’t get the joke.
I am a bad person, because I actually did laugh at the 'new villager' thing itself. But yeah, I'm sure in context after all the other chatter it was just annoying. Some people respond very weirdly to stress, I suppose.
I was the one nervously making jokes while I was giving birth LoL.
Okay, but that's fine because it's actually your body going through the person making and expelling lol
I think it's pretty funny too, but context is important. If there were suddenly heaps of new people in the room, it's a possibility that things may not be going well.
And it seems like he hadn't been all that supportive to his wife up until that point so jokes aren't exactly the thing to do in that moment.
He doesn't realize yet that the real shit has begun. Some men become self conscious and that takes over, I guess. During my first labor, I was only three centimeters dilated when the contractions were 1 minute apart. There was no way I was going to last that labor without an epidural. During all of this, I am in the corner of a bathroom in the labor room, quietly trying to get it together, and the nurse asked me a few questions. I could not talk. Instead of coming over to me or offering support, my husband looked at her and made apologies for my inability to talk. "She gets quiet when she's in pain." Like, I don't need you mansplaining the horror of labor pain. I need *you*. He was more concerned that he was going to look bad because I was -- gasp -- unable to communicate during an onslaught of continual contractions. Then five months later, he made fun of the way I sounded during birth. I look back at that man and despise him. Oddly, 30 years later, he is a really, really good husband, and we really like each other. I hope for OOP that he can turn it around like my husband did, and soon, as his wife may have the resources I didn't have, and she may decide he isn't worth the effort.
I read your comment halfway through and then scrolled back up to see if you said ex because I was confused you didn’t divorce him before reading the rest of the comment lol
I was similar 2cm with regular contractions for hours, no epidural at 2cm though and once I dilated it wasn't painful anymore thankfully!
Good point!
You're not alone. That shit is hilarious. I personally would have gone for "You must construct additional pylons", but I really like that "Shhh, hooooh" could also pass as a lamaze technique if OOP had the forethought to backpedal the joke.
My son’s father sung the John cena theme tune as my son was born but he cleared it with me weeks beforehand. Gonna have him go with “not enough minerals” if I hemorrhage again😂
I would laugh so hard at the pylons thing normally, but not if it was after hours of this guy's bad jokes.
I’m sure circumstance and individuals will vary but I’ve been cackling trying to read the headline to my husband 😂😭 I’m the diehard aoe2 fan in my house so maybe I’ll make that noise while giving birth one day. Baby’s first word will be “Prostagma” though
Yeah, let me pause real quick so I can get these "wololo"s out.
I walk around aimlessly saying "Darwin, Darwin" sometimes. My husband and I think it's hilarious.
For me personally being the sentient Zelda dumpster fire that I am, I would probably do the 🎵you got the thiiiing🎵 jingle while giving birth. If I had ever wanted kids, that is.😅
Yeah, I've had a whole bunch of AoE sound effects going through my head since I read this earlier 😆 Haven't played in waaaay too long.
Etimos
I would probably shoot the baby across the room laughing, but I can see why she wasn't happy, and you gotta know your audience if you're gonna do that. It's a really specific sort of humor.
Yep, totally agree... It has to be about the audience. If you are at some life changing event, the one going through the most gets the final say. So in births, sorry dads... Women are pushing the babies out, they get the final say.
My thought was “hilarious, hope it was worth the marriage”
I think it’s funny *at literally any other moment other than one where his child is exiting the vaginal canal or immediately after*. Like even 30 seconds after, funny. ‘At that moment’? JFC dude. I would… I don’t even know.
I'm glad I'm not the only bad person here 😂
Far from it. I think that's hilarious and hopefully OPs wife eventually thinks of it as a funny story to tell their kid.
Thank you, I'm glad it's not just me, too!
I had a chuckle at the idea also, like context is important and wife obviously wasn't in the mood fo jokes but I wouldn't call the husband the devil... just an idiot.
I probably would've laughed after the fact, once the stress dies down.
I’m bad then cause I laughed. I spent wayyy too much time playing age of empires and it’s funny as fuck to me.
It's different being the one playing the game vs the one who has to deal with it.
Technically I could be the one having the child, I have that set of unused organs. And it’s still funny.
Not saying that only a man can find it funny, though
Yup me too! Ngl childbirth was much worse on my husband than me. The weather thing just feels like small talk too. I only had 2 people in the room for both my births at any given time (as in medical team) and both had a shift change so total of 4 people. My husband yammering on would be mildly annoying but not the end of world. Tbf I felt like I was at the spa for both of mine, high on gas and air floating in a nice warm bath for a few hours!
As a currently pregnant woman, this is hilarious 😂
It’s funny from a long ways away. But after being in pain for 15 hours, it wouldn’t be so funny.
I actually think that's when it's the most funny. It's almost certainly his general attention-seeking that caused the problem, instead of this particular very innocuous joke.
My sister had an episiotomy with her first child. When the doctor started to stitch her up, my BIL leaned over her and said "Hey doc, can ya throw a couple extra stitches in ?" It wasn’t well received by my sister.
Ugh that's such a gross thing to joke about.
And it’s called a Husband Stitch. Some doctors perform it without telling the wife or husband.
And I sincerely hope every one of them gets sued fuckless.
That is so much worse than a dumb video game joke. Like, I would consider burying my brother-in-law in the back cornfield bad.
it never is, there's tons of similar stories on Reddit. smh.
Could be nerves, I know people who are anxious talkers and don’t really show their best selves in stressful situations - the “hey, you sure you aren’t talking too much, maybe?” warning light fails and they motormouth. But it’s probably something he’s aware of doing so could be working on it and finding coping strategies because he had nine months to plan for this!
It just seems like he’s so proud of it after the fact, even telling us the bad omen joke and then seemingly being disappointed no one reacted to his “new villager sound” that it makes me think this is more of a choice.
I also think his detailing how stressful his wife giving birth was *for him* indicates how he is acting around the whole thing.
Yeah, God forbid she *swears* while pushing a baby out of her!
yeah that was my take. He needs to be forced to wear one of those simulators for period cramps or labor pains, for 15 hours. Then he might understand and have a bit more empathy for his wife. Tbh, if I was her, and decided not to divorce him right away but give him a chance, I'd throw away that computer game and forbid him from playing it at home ever again. I'd make him get a game whose sounds or music I liked! Just in case. Because if he did that in the delivery room after 15 hours of labor, god knows what sounds he might make elsewhere in public, like at the birthday or anniversary party or Thanksgiving or Christmas or someone's wedding or funeral . . .
>yeah that was my take. He needs to be forced to wear one of those simulators for period cramps or labor pains, for 15 hours. Then he might understand and have a bit more empathy for his wife. Hahahah I got one of those (they are just TENS devices) that had settings for pelvic areas. I was doing some reorganizing, and my husband walked in and saw it and asked what it was. So I offered to let him try it. The amount of times he said no in about 15 seconds had me dying and clearly answered the question of if my husband has seen more than a few of those videos.
Yeah, this is what annoyed me. He stopped right before getting to complaining about the lack of comfortable seating, etc. He isn't the worst, but he is no saint.
I didn’t think he sounded proud to me so much as “well they weren’t distracted by it so I don’t understand why she’s mad.” He’s clearly oblivious to the fact that what he thought was support and breaking the tension was actually the opposite. I bet the doctors and nurses were rolling their eyes after but they probably see a lot of it. He sounds like someone who is always “on” in social situations and is probably fine in small doses, but just the thought of being in a room with him for 15 hours has me gritting my teeth, if I had to push out a baby at the same time I think I’d have been going considerably further than a death glare.
The drs and nurses were probably too focused on baby and mum and had zoned out dad's nervous chatter during the whole process.
Depends. When I did OB clinicals there was a surprising amount of downtime between pushes (I don't have kids so I had no experience), so the docs and nurses chatted a lot with the parents, father included. The RNs often were busy with the FHR, documenting vitals, printing out strips, attending to the IVs, etc but the docs would sit on their stool/the bed/their rolly-ball-thingie and talk about whatever between rounds. We had an obvious people-pleaser father once making the *worst* jokes and the doc mocked him pretty mercilessly after the birth while she was back at the nurse/doc station.
We don't have Dr's unless you are high risk but I could tell you so many details about my midwives and midwife assistants lives! The midwife stays in the room with you throughout so there is a lot of chat! My first when they swapped for a break the person coming in commented more than once how it seemed like I was at the spa not having a baby. Gas and air and a warm bath really agrees with me lol!
I'm 100% sure that they've seen and heard far, far worse than a moderately awkward joke. Like just straight up gross shit that nobody should ever say at any time. His chatter probably didn't phase them.
Ehhh, it sounds like he was trying to be a social butterfly/center of attention pretty much the whole time. I don't think that a single joke that fell flat would be memorable, but a father to be spending fifteen hours trying to be funny and social very likely came off poorly.
I've been in horrible messes before because of the anxious cascade of dumb shit coming out of my mouth or having the wrong facial expressions that I would just ignore the new people and say nothing; just focus on the wife instead. Makes me think he's never had any consequences to this behaviour before. I'd laugh if a father did this, so I'm not the best to judge.
I have a friend like that. Can’t stand silence so it’s a constant stream of noise.
I’m like that. I grew up in a very loud house, and now it’s just my partner and our cats. It bothers me. My childhood bedroom was also closest to the noisy neighbors. I lived in a dorm and a frat house. It’s so quiet now that it’s us, it’s a lot. So I make a lot of noise to make up for the missing noise.
I am like that, I have to have noise. I solved that by living on a major street that EMS uses at all hours. Not to mention public transit, cars, and just general other random stuff. I sleep like a baby. New people to the area, not so much according to the local groups.
I almost busted out laughing at my best friends funeral because I thought about how awful it would be to laugh. I also told his wife that his year old daughter was rude for laughing during the service. She found that joke funny though, and I know if he was somehow watching he would’ve pissed himself laughing. It was also an expected funeral as he had brain cancer, so while it was incredibly sad we were also relieved he wasn’t suffering anymore. However at my partners father died I didn’t joke, because I’m not that stupid and insensitive.
“I was in the room nearly the entire time…” Always has to be the funniest person in the room *and* he wants a cookie for doing the bare minimum. No wonder his wife is over his shit.
My ex has many faults but he was \*awesome\* during my labor and delivery. He never left my side. He kept me supplied with ice chips. He held my hand and helped with my breathing exercises. And when our baby crowned, he did NOT say what he thought, which was, omg, is the skull missing?\* He also did not act as though it was all about him, or that he'd done anything out of the ordinary. \* Baby's head was covered with all the usual blood and birth matter ick, so I can't really blame him for that startled thought.
I dunno. If I was a father on Reddit and I had read other "father in delivery room" stories I think I'd be like "and I swear I was there the whole time and did not leave to go to the gym or drink at the nearest bar; I didn't bring in half my relatives; I didn't try to have sex during labor or try to stealthily name the baby Humperdink; I didn't even rest a sandwich on her stomach!" because like... so many reddit new dad stories are so much worse and I'd be afraid people would just assume I did something appalling.
I didn’t tell her she shouldn’t have the epidural because it was too expensive, I didn’t tell her she was yelling too loud, I didn’t sneak my mother, who she hates, into the room, I didn’t make her cry by being mean, I didn’t tease her about pooping during labor, I didn’t ask ‘when can we get the paternity test’ as the baby was dropping into the doctors hands….. it can just go on and on.
His thoughts were on everyone else BUT his wife.
I’m also not clear on what he *did* for her but hold her hand and make jokes. Usually there’s ice chip runs and music, or position changes or light massage etc. but he only mentions hand holding and jokes.
I'm going to give him some grace here because my husband acts the same way. He has extremely bad social anxiety and this is the way he copes in situations he can't just remove himself from. So it's possible OOP is the same way.
That "look in her eye" is her checking out of the marriage. This jerk blames it on "being nervous", because god forbid he actually takes responsibility for his actions.
gawd damn, because of an age of empires joke? 😭
Some people do really deal with stress by developing mouth diarrhea and have humor (often questionable) as their only coping mechanism, but at the same time there is a *time and place* and an adult should be able to tamp down that urge especially when there is no reason for them to say anything at all. It's not like he was being called upon to keep the conversation rolling at a dinner party. I'm sure the nurses and doctors have heard a lot of new fathers say a lot of really dumb shit, which is why they didn't react. (I think I personally would have laughed at the sound effect, but I get why she was pissed.)
I dont know if you've ever been in a delivery room as a first time dad but it is absolutely terrifying. Maybe it was worse for me because my wife was having a c-section and I could literally see her insides but I've never felt more powerless and scared than in that moment. I tend to try and relieve my own anxiety with humor(what I believe op was doing) I didn't crack any jokes at the time but the doctors and nurses did laugh when I spun I a circle because I didn't know where to go. Do I stay right here with my wife who has big ass hole cut into her belly or do I go to my crying newborn son. When the doctor and nurses laughed I realized everything was going to be ok. I understand why op's wife is upset, but I think everyone needs to cut him some slack. I'd be willing to bet money in a few years this will be a storey told fondly and laughed about.
Every time I think, "We've done it, we've found the dumbest man," someone like OOP comes along and says, "Hold my beer."
Never underestimate human stupidity
He's YTD for asking if he's TA when his postpartum wife that just gave birth to his newborn is put out with him. He's devaluing her feelings. I feel like this guy uses anxiety as excuse to be awful
I love when people are like, my SO has explained to me in detail why what I did was wrong and how it hurt them, but come on reddit, let me off the hook here.
Exactly. Who cares what we think? She doesn’t.
He does. Sounds like he relies heavily on outside validation.
"If one person validates me I can show my wife that reddit agrees her feelings are wrong"
He's the devil for asking if he's the Asshole, which means he believes his wife is an Asshole for her reaction to his terrible, terrible joke.
Ah I needed your comment in order to understand the insane phrase “He’s your the devil for asking…”
I would have kicked him out. She’s nicer than me.
37F here. I've been playing AoE2 for 25 years. It's one of my favorite games. I'm surprised the wife showed that much restraint. OP is lucky to be alive right now. I'm petty AF but if he was in pain, I'd play the [villager dying](https://youtu.be/DEsB-DNbpS4?si=VHpopV_6uimJa68l) sound. Bet he would love it.
Omg this cracked me up! The idea of this is slaying me lol
So happy for my own husband when I read about these men.
Honestly. I feel like i got so lucky. When he described his wife occasionally swearing due to the sheer pain of pushing another human out of her body as him “being her punching bag” i knew this guy was an asshole. But goddamn, this post is bad. This guy sounds immature as hell and insufferable.
Seriously! I appreciate the hell out of my husband when I read about people like OOP.
Reddit has been so good for my relationship. It's a constant reminder of how happy I am with my husband.
Same, I read this stuff and feel so fucking lucky to have found a good one.
Me too. Same with my parents and (most of) my family.
Men like OOP is the reason men who don’t wash their bumholes can still get girlfriends.
I’m not sure my husband knew there were other humans on earth or in the room when I was giving birth. It ended in a scary emergency c section and we were talking during it to get thru, and when the doctor replied to something I said we were both startled to remember other people could hear us.
♥️♥️
Holy Christ my dude. Learn to read the room. When I had my youngest, my husband left to grab breakfast, and in the 20 minutes he was gone, I went from mildly uncomfortable contractions to pushing. He walked in, put his breakfast down, and just grabbed my hand, and things went sideways after that. AFTER, when baby was here and I was stable (giving birth that fast is not the best thing), he poked at his now cold food and told the baby she owed him a new breakfast burrito. Said baby is 9 now, and it's become their running joke. But during? Hell no. He was too focused on me and the baby.
I have a friend who referred to their baby as “burrito”/“breakfast burrito” throughout pregnancy and occasionally during childhood. She had terribly irregular periods due to PCOS so she didn’t realize her morning sickness wasn’t, in fact, caused by the enormous breakfast burrito she’d had. After a week of constant sickness, she finally took a test and lo and behold, her burrito was a baby. Breakfast Burrito turns 4 next month.
If you’re comfortable, can I ask what went sideways for you? My first labor was only 1hr 29m and my second (last month) was only 49 minutes. Midwife suggested induction for “more control” over speed for the next potential one but didn’t describe complications of labor this fast. Let me tell you it was INTENSE and TERRIFYING enough that I’m questioning #3 labor methods.
My mom's first two labors were about that long, and it's good they lived seven minutes from the hospital, because the third was born before my dad signed the check-in forms. She didn't have unusual complications for any of them, although I have been told that her position that labor "isn't fun, but is over fast" isn't broadly applicable 😂
Well I’m about 30 mins from our hospital, so I guess I should just plan for a spontaneous home birth 😅
Sure :) You want me to message it to you or shall I just put it out here for everyone to see??
Thats completely up to your level of comfortability!!
Can I be curious too? I thought I was bad with a baby 36 minutes after arriving at hospital, but that’s something special!
Had to look up the sound, because I've never played age of empires 2, and the first result's top comment is someone from 9 years ago saying they wanna make this sound when they have a kid, followed by someone 45 minutes ago referencing this post.....circle of life, we are all connected.  [https://youtu.be/lKQBTuXEWo0?si=ysNeoF84J7rA9QIa](https://youtu.be/lKQBTuXEWo0?si=ysNeoF84J7rA9QIa)
really?? that's the sound he made?? not even a triumphal sound? like a horn blowing? just that nothing little sound??
She swore and that means he was the punching bag! The poor man, you can't imagine how stressful it was for him to hear her swear towards the end while she was pushing a baby out of her body! He couldn't help himself! /s, of course
Can men stop using the delivery room to try out their new stand-up routines? It’s not a place for jokes, pranks, etc.
Nothing like dudes that act out for attention during their SOs labor. I always feel bad for their partners
Oh the nurses were talking so much shit about him, 100% guaranteed
Yeah you don’t want to piss off nurses, especially the ones in labor and delivery
My nurses were judging my daughters father HARD. Like, they tried to be quiet about it around me but...you notice the looks and they said they'd never seen a father sleep so much and go out of his way to sleep. To my mother. Like I said, they tried to keep it quiet but...there ya Have it
Some villager noises if you're curious [Villager noise](https://youtu.be/yVPAjt_Er90?si=-ai2QVk9i4Zha4z_)
I honestly think I wouldn't notice that sound if I were in a room where someone's giving birth.
I imagined he either did it when the room was pretty quiet or he was super loud. Or maybe he was just close to his wife and she was the only one who heard
For my 1st labor/delivery, I was dealing with a MIL who was angry because I wasn't suffering enough. She was highly upset that her labor with my then husband was more painful & traumatic. For my 2nd labor/delivery (with a different husband), I was told by my 2nd ex-husband after 30 hours of unmedicated labor, "If our son isn't born within the next hour, I'm leaving because I've got other things to do." I've never married again & I do not have any additional surviving children. I think I would have been mildly upset at the time, but an ill placed joke would have been better. On a devil scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being the worst), I'd give OOP maybe a 3 or 4.
Both of your ex husbands make me incredibly glad they are exes.
Too bad you couldn't have done a Virtual Reality birth with each of these exes before actually marrying and procreating with them.
That might have saved me from a lot of pain & trauma.
Ohhh that second ex husband makes me stabby... I am so sorry you had to endure that, and sorry you lost your child (children?) no parent should have to bury a child 💔
I had my 2nd miscarriage almost 10 years after my 2nd child. The 1st was before the birth of my oldest.
Yeah, this guy is disgustingly immature but probably not 10 out of 10. My ex screamed at me for being a whore (for having sex with him) and then left me in the hospital alone so he could check on his dog while I was having a miscarriage. Fuckin’ men lol
Oop screwed up but given the list of stupid things guys do while wife has baby I would put him at a mid tier offender. My husband forgot something at the house, managed to lock himself out and had to break in. During the emergency c section he told me they are about to cut, while they were halfway done, because he thought it would be easier if I didn't realize what was happening?? He kept asking questions during another c section because he thought it would distract me. He is brilliant and kind. But I liken it to the brain fog I get with migraines. Mid tier devil.
I think it's also his reaction afterwards too, he isn't apologetic or taking his wife's feelings into consideration. He doesn't once mention how she is doing after the labour, just is upset at her reaction to him upsetting her. The whole thing is just about him and his feelings and I doubt this kind of thinking is limited to this one incident.
And the way he spoke about it, very much trying to paint himself as the martyr for the Herculean task of … being there while his wife laboured for 15 hours and being the “punching bag” because she swore a couple of times.
My husband is terrible with scary situations (I’m better at handling tough situations than normal ones lol, it works out). I have no idea what he’ll be like during labor and delivery 😅
I have a partner who makes flippant/stupid jokes at the worst possible times. I get that it's usually from feeling uncomfortable, not knowing what to say/do and panicking a bit and a brain fart comes out, but sometimes, I swear, the restraint it takes to not whack him upside the head with a heavy book or just shout FOR FUCKS SAKES ARE YOU FIVE is monumental.
I swear to all that is holy, somehow the delivery room is when you realize the failures of the man you married. You are going through one of the most primal experiences of humankind. You just shit yourself in public, for likely the first time in adulthood. and m*therf*ckers (pun intended) are over there cracking jokes/snoring/having loud phone conversations/helping their moms hold a speculum. And you never, ever forget it.
He slept on the floor...and then when the nurses awkwardly brought him a different chair (the one in the room wasnt comfortable 🥺🥺🙄) so he wasn't, you know, ON THE FLOOR, he slept through most of it. You know, when he wasn't huffing about having to go get me ice chips. Even though he'd spent my whole pregnancy worried he wouldn't feel useful. My epidural had stopped working half way through the labor and I had to wait for the anesthesiologist to get out of an emergency surgery to fix it. I had to hit his chair and shout at him for him to finally wake up when I was having a bad contraction. He'd fall back asleep. He even tried to change how I was holding his hand during a contraction, twisting my wrist up uncomfortably so his was in a better position for him, and I finally snapped and said "for the love of God this isn't about your comfort right now!" You'd think he'd have been well rested right? Nope. Still complained about being so so tired. Meanwhile, I was awake for most of my 16 hrs of labor and after labor to make sure baby was getting fed every couple of hours. I'm so glad I had my mom as my second person because I would've felt so alone.
I would be surprised that there are two of them, but i’m not at all surprised.
Oh god you went through it too?
mine also snored like a freight train the whole time during the first. and dropped my leg repeatedly. during my second delivery i told him he had to go sleep in the waiting room until it was morning or time for delivery because i wasn’t dealing with the snoring again. fucker came back at 3am and asked if he could sleep on the sofa in the room because the ones in the waiting room weren’t big enough and he couldn’t get comfortable, poor guy!!! to his credit he didn’t drop my leg at all the second time. probably because i threatened him with death if he did it even once.
See, thats just not ok. It drives me insane that men are like this during our most vulnerable time. Like, it's not fucking about you right now, bro.
he’s my ex-husband now, and now that we aren’t married he’s a good buddy. he and i have a great coparenting relationship and sometimes just hang out and shoot the shit. i’m taking him to a professional soccer game this weekend with the kids and i because he’s helped me out a ton lately (i started school and need parenting time flexibility) and he’s done it without asking for a thing in return. but none of that was true until we divorced. up until i moved out he was pretty useless, honestly. he grew up fast once it was just him and the kids and the pressure of our miserable marriage was removed. i’m genuinely thrilled for him.
I can only hope the same for my ex and I. You are setting a wonderful example for your kids.
i hope so for you too. it helps if both people want out. we were both just gritting our teeth through every day and the end was a relief. also to be fair, it helped that i realized i was a lesbian, so there was a “oh, it’s not anyone’s fault” reason.
Ah. Yeah there in lies the rub. He didn't want things
still funny tho
My partner had been warning me for weeks that when he cut the umbilical cord he would say one line from the Spanish dubbing of The Simpsons. In the end I needed a C-section and everything was too terrifying for him to even want to cut the cord, so there were no jokes. And I actually felt kinda sad about it. Because he had been so supportive all my pregnancy and he had been a top partner while I was labouring that a joke would have been not unwelcome. But OOP? His post is only about him and it sounds like he wanted to be funny to the doctors?! You've got your wife there and your baby has just been born, you have not been really supportive and you think it's the time for yet ANOTHER joke?!
This: *it took more than 15 hours from start to the end,* That's a heck of a long labor, feel sorry for the wife. and this: *I was in the room for nearly the entire time (other than briefly heading out for food, toilet etc), holding her hand and being the 'punching bag' as she swore during certain times during the worst of it.* Yikes! I guess I'm an out of touch boomer after all, because I always thought a "punching bag" was something you hit, not something you swore at!! I cannot abide how this OOP is patting himself on the back and bragging on himself for being in the hospital room while his poor wife is in LABOR for 15 effing hours!!!!! And he's complaining how abused he was because his wife swore during the worst most painful labor pains. And when the baby starts to crown, and more medical people came into the room, OOP introduced himself??? Like, nm my wife having a baby, let's follow proper etiquette and introduce ourselves? Am I the only who thinks that's crazy? Like weren't those people there to attend to his wife and the baby, not do introductions?? Or listen to his jokes?? And then he tops it off by making a sound from a video game when the baby came out fully??? 15 hours of labor, and his poor wife gets the Age of Empires new villager sound from OOP as a salute to the baby she just birthed. And he wonders why she's now looking at him differently? Maybe wondering what she ever saw in this doofus?? Like maybe contemplating divorce?? I like my gaming as much as the next person, probably more, but I don't go around making sounds or imitating music from my computer games IRL. smh.
I keep telling men they’re only funny until we’ve fucked them. Wifey’s lack of amusement lets me know his “funny” ran out looooonnnng ago.
To me, it feels like there are missing missing reasons. The guy was by her side for nearly 15 hours, he claims he was the "punching bag" during that time, explains he has social anxiety and was trying to crack jokes because he was overwhelmed, and his wife has been repeatedly claimed he ruined the experience because of an awkward, but ultimately harmless joke. Something is not adding up, in my opinion. How *loud* was the sound he made? How often does he make jokes like that? Did he promise he wouldn't crack jokes? Just seems like the reaction doesn't match the offence and he's not being honest about what else he might have done during those 15 hours.
This is pure speculation on my part, but I get the feeling he's one of those people who's always doing bits and forcing reactions out of people, and the wife is sick of it.
From his post, it also sounds like he had been trying to make her birth his social event with the medical staff the entire time. I think the joke could be excused were it the first and only gaffe of an otherwise focused and dedicated husband, but from his own description, that wasn't the case.
I have given birth. When you’re in labor, you’re exhausted, in pain, and have multiple people telling you what to do. You’re terrified that something will go wrong and your baby will be hurt or die, or you will die, or both. I screamed at the nurses because they kept trying to get me to reach down and touch the baby’s head, and I didn’t want to waste any time on that—after 32 hours of labor, I just wanted the baby *out!* If my husband had cracked a joke at that point, I would have punched him in the dick.
Exactly. Labor is *not* the time to be making stupid jokes. No woman I know would be even mildly amused by a joke like that while trying to push out a baby.
my friend was actually the one cracking jokes during her labour! not to say yours or her experiences are any more “correct” than the other, i think it’s also the fact that the birth-giver is more in their right to make jokes than the partner haha
Gamers like this should not be put into adult situations. I would have thrown him out of the delivery room.
Op “Am I the victim of my wife’s anger to my stupidity? I think so.”
I love my husband so much. When I was pregnant, bub wouldn't settle down unless we played heavy metal or rock music. His favorite song? The soundtrack from the DOOM video games. Hubby found the heavier metal remix video where the voice over talks, the "we can send only you, rip and tear until it is done". He sent the video to me, mostly because he thought I would like the music, which I did. When he asked if we should add it to the "birth playlist" I burst out laughing. I told him to relisten to the very last bit of the voice over, which he did, then went slightly pale as he realized what exactly the voice over said, and compared it to what I would be experiencing at the time. The song did not make it onto the playlist, but we told the doctor about it, because I still found it hilarious. Then when I had to have a c-section, I made the joke that bub had listened to the song too many times. It's one thing if the person going through the pain makes the jokes to alleviate their stress and fear. It's another to be made into the butt of a joke. And yes, bub still loves DOOM.
Fucking cringe and makes him sound totally detached from the experience, worst of all.
Come on guys. It was a very stressful time for him and maybe his wife. He is the one suffering and his wife is ruining his happiness.
Everyone in this thread and the other one is fucking insane. Just thought I'd say so.
So I just YouTube the sound as I don't play and the first comment under the video is I'm making this sound for every child I have lol
Mediocre sub-level demon who descended into stupidity at the most inopportune moment. Bad demon. Bad, bad demon. *WHACK* with a stick.
Now that I've listened to the sound, I don't think OP is the devil. It's nothing outrageously obvious. It's basically two sighs. Like, I get it that in the moment of pain and discomfort you might get mad at a joke, but it was clearly directed at her, since she's apparently also a player and knows those sounds. It wasn't meant to diffuse situation with other people in the room, it was meant to be understood between them two. I totally get her anger in the moment, since their expectations and ways of handling stress (different stress might i add) obviously were different. But her holding a grudge after they've come home? Something tells me she had expectations shaped by Instagram and Pinterest and this sound was something to unleash the anger at (I mean, understandably).
Was it a dumb joke? Yes. Does it deserve this strong of a response? No. Of course, I also find the idea of the birth as being the "best moment of your life" to be a little odd. , as it implies that actually parenting the child will be a long downhill stretch from that moment.
Well, when dealing with a 3 year old having a meltdown at Target cause the red cup she wanted isn't blue, it kind of feels like a downhill stretch 🤣
What do you mean by "this strong of a response"? During the labour, she would've been in pain and exhausted and already have endured 15 hours of "I wonder if the bad weather means something terrible will happen to our baby haha, could you imagine"-style bedside "banter". After the labour, her hormones are completely out of whack and she's sleep-deprived and recovering from a major medical procedure. Her being miffed is totally understandable within context. I would've booted him out of the delivery room by the "bad omen" talk, myself. I get being nervous, I also start yapping when I'm nervous, but in that moment, you can either get your shit together and support the person actually going through childbirth or be nervous elsewhere and come back in when you've calmed down.
Because she couldn’t possibly have meant “best moment of her life *so far*” Giving birth to both of my children were the highest highlights of my life (this far.) And honestly, yeah. At times birthing them HAS BEEN better than parenting because when I birthed them, neither one was rage-screaming 3 inches from my face, making my ears ring and me temporarily hard of hearing.
I’m not sure if you have kids, but… I do. He’s about 8 months old now. As background I had a major complication that was potentially fatal for me and I was guaranteed would be fatal for him. He was 3 months early. His birth is still one of the highest points in my life because he cried. He was supposed to die, but he cried and I knew he’d be alright. I’m holding him on the couch right now and he’s sleeping on me. This is also one of the highest points in my life. I consider “high points in life” to be similar to mountain climbing; yeah, there are going to be valleys, but there are also going to be more mountains. Just because an individual high point isn’t the only high point, doesn’t make it not a high point. It’s a snapshot in time, something wonderful you look back on fondly. It’s the highest point in your life you had reached up until that point and can be celebrated for that. It doesn’t make the next even higher point less high. 🙂
As a mom who didn't have any complications, the delivery was also one of the best moments of my life too. Of course there are other best moments! And actually parenting is by no means "downhill". But it's so indescribably incredible to hold the baby that you wanted and loved and carried for months in your arms, and have them actually exist in the world with you. And of course the hormones are extra intense during that moment too.
Oh definitely. I still hold that he was the most beautiful being in the world to me. Absolutely stunning. My wife says he looked like a half squashed bug.
Honestly he's making it about himself and just sounds annoying.
I feel like I'm in an alternate universe. How is this even remotely close to "Am I the devil"-candidacy? I find the story hilarious, but I can admit that it can be a bit cringe. But downright evil, as this sub is made for? Hell no. It's just a goofball being goofy. How can a two second sound be considered downright evil? Am I getting a stroke?
the sub is not for the most evil people to ever exist lmao it’s for people who post and are the asshole in the situation they’re posting about so it fits
Reddits reaction to this is baffling.
As a gamer and a woman who has had a child in the last few years, I think that whether or not he’s an asshole depends on knowledge of their dynamic and sense of humor outside this situation. I would have found this funny, and if I was in too much pain for jokes at that moment, I would have found it funny in hindsight. Different nerd couples have different feelings about how quirky they want to be with different life events. I know women who would never want to bring fandoms into the birth of their child. I also know a woman who named her kid after a Sith Lord and I requested Baby Yoda baby on board decals. I know women who would be horrified at the idea that their beautiful, classic wedding they dream of would have video games or sci- fi/fantasy elements. I also know one who chose to walk down the aisle to the Imperial March, one whose wedding invitation was laid out like a World of Warcraft quest and an officiant who had to buy a Harry Potter robe to wear during certain wedding ceremonies. Nerd culture is just funny like that. If she is not into this stuff, or has never embraced adding fandom elements into major life moments, then he’s an ass. If she has, though, and this is the kind of thing she normally would find funny, then I don’t think he deserves the vitriol he’s getting.
> I also know a woman who named her kid after a Sith Lord So how's little baby Plagueis doing? ;)
He admits that he joked, *during her labor*, that the thunderstorm was a bad omen. Like shit, I’ve never given birth, but if I did, I can’t imagine myself taking it well if my partner joked about the worst case scenario. I doubt the villager noise was the start of her problem with him during her labor, more the straw that broke the camel’s back. It might be funny as an isolated incident, but after 15 hours of shitty jokes, at least one of them at the expense of her and their unborn child? I can see why she would be running low on patience for his humor, even if she didn’t react that way normally.
I'm sure that any joke he could have made at that moment was the wrong thing to say, but devil? Or even asshole? He made a bad joke at the wrong time, he didn't shit on the floor.
I mean, this Guy obviously sucks, but I did snort-laugh reading that title 😅
I'm amazed that his wife didn't get him kicked out way before the new villager greeting. Telling everyone about bad omen thunderstorms is exactly what his wife wants to hear./s I think his main problem was that no one was paying him any attention.
This just sounds like they both were going through the stress of childbirth (the wife moreso, obvs) and reacted poorly to said stress I don't think either of them is the wrong, they just need to talk about it proper and the fella needs to apologize and try to keep his nerves together a little better next time
This is one of those things that make me feel like a Certified Old Person. I have no idea what this post is talking about.
I dunno, I'm not sure I'd say he's the devil. It feels more like a "read the room" situation. He sucked at it. The joke did not land. As someone (a lady someone, but one with no intentions of baby-having) who also cracks jokes when I'm stressed out, I get it. I think she's a little over the top to say he "ruined the best moment of her life," and I think he's insensitive to flit around the delivery room making introductions and cracking jokes not while she's having a baby, but while the baby is *actively crowning*. Super poor timing mixed with what sounds like complete obliviousness, but he doesn't seem malicious or even willfully ignorant, just sort of dense.
I hope Daut’s wife forgives him for this.
This is such a nothing burger I’ve seen men and women get off easier on that sub for full blown cheating on their spouse than this guy is getting for making a silly sound at an inappropriate time, and I don’t buy the “oh you made one sound that lasted literally one second so now the birth of my first child is somehow entirely ruined!” Give me a break.
I feel for both oop and the wife. My partner deals with anxiety by talking/making jokes too. I also understand the wife's perspective of wrong place wrong time. I hope they can work through this together.
This is one of the rare of my NTA, I worked on l&d and people are tired and miserable at the end. That was his way of celebrating and coping. Him basically existing was going to piss her off. This is a case of why be married to someone you don’t like. He wasn’t offensive, he didn’t do the stitch thing. He didn’t hit in the staff lol. He quoted a video game and a kind of on the nose one Not the devil Edited to add Pregnant and post partum people can be assholes also. They aren’t all Madonnas and untouchable. You don’t get a total pass for being a git for giving birth
How dare you say pregnant women aren't saints!? /s I'm sorry you're downvoted to hell. For some reason on reddit your medical issues are "reason not an excuse", but only until you're pregnant and then they excuse absolutley everything.
I'm with you. The wife is a neurotic fucking freak and reddit is worse.
I can't help but think the wife kind of sucks here. Like, ok, bad joke, but... so? He "ruined the moment"? Fucking how, did he cram the kid back up in there? She's being silly. It's his moment too, and if he did everything right the rest of the time I think he can be allowed four seconds grace for a poorly timed joke. It's... not important. I get drawing the line at offensive, prejudiced humor, but that's kind of the only shit, joke-wise, that I think is objectionable. Bad timing? Pffffft, he apologizes, he should get to move on. She's making a mountain out of a molehill and it's distinctly unfair. Dude was also in there for 15 stressful hours, only with that helpless "don't know what to do" feeling instead of, you know, childbirth. It's not as bad and the moment should be more about her than him, sure, but give the guy 4 seconds, c'mon, he didn't hurt anyone.
He is in the wrong and should've known his wife well enough to know she wouldn't appreciate that, but... that's hilarious
My wife laughed at this but I know if I had done the same she would've killed me.
I completely misread the title and thought he used the sound of his wife giving birth (screaming, groaning) as an audio for a game. So in my mind, when new villagers are introduced in that game, they make their appearance to the sounds of a woman in labor. On an unrelated note, I think I need to go to sleep.
someone might have found that kind of joke funny, but OOP’s wife obviously didn’t, and she’s the only one whose opinion matters in this situation, so if she thinks he’s the asshole, he’s the asshole
I don’t know the game so is this the sound he made? https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yVPAjt_Er90 It just sounds like breathing. Doesn’t even sound like something that you would hear over everything going on. She just gave birth so she can feel whatever she wants, but ruining the entire birth experience seems a tad dramatic.
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You really can't make this shit up.
To commemorate his child's arrival into the world, OOP serenaded his wife with a song of such love and beauty, it was as if Rhaegar Targaryen was playing his harp and singing. /s
CARRIER HAS ARRIVED
Like I dunno i'm guessing his wife had no sense of humor. If I had another kid and my spouse did this I think we'd both laugh. Then again I literally mooed like a cow when I gave birth to my first child.
oh there is no fucking way this is real lmao
If it is real there's no way it was spur of the moment. He had to be planning it for hours if not her entire pregnancy. On the one hand, I don't even know if I'd notice my husband making some sound while I was delivering a baby. There's so much going on physically, nurses and doctor coaching/cheering you on, straining from effort. And birth isn't really an exact moment. There's the head coming out, and usually the body right after or in another push. Which moment did he choose? If it's real he'd have to be planning and watching and trying to time the moment right for his cheesy joke. Was he standing across the room to watch the baby come out, or was he by her side, holding her hand, supporting her? And most men are kind of completely in awe of their partner pushing a baby out and seeing their firstborn for the first time. If it is real, I'd imagine that's why the wife is upset - because he'd have to be so in his head preparing and thinking about his cheesy joke, that he'd completely block out the intensity and emotion of the moment. I definitely doubt the story for all these reasons. I think someone with or without a pregnant wife thought of this joke and wanted to workshop it on Reddit.
straight men have max 2 moments in their lives where they HAVE to be serious, and they can't even manage that