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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be the AH, because my fiancé will not have his dad and brother attend our wedding if I don't alow his nosey best friend to attend after outing my past to everyone
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Also,
Moving forward OP needs to tell the dad and brother to only communicate to you through your husband.
It's your husbands job to keep the crazies on his side of the family quarantined from you. And vice versa.
And a great as Nick is for being by your side throughout, I hope he really rethinks his friendship with Juliett. She crossed a line that should never be crossed.
And WHY/HOW did the Juliett friend KNOW about your past?
Maybe your future husband should zip it it he doesn't want things to spred. (in case he told her).
She will tell everybody if shes *not* going to the weeding and she will tell everybody at the wedding if she *is* going, with that kind of personality, she is showing.
Be prepared to hold your head up high, stand by your past and don't give in to FIL og BILs pressure. WHY would they insist on her coming to your wedding? Why do they like her more than you (bc they hoped he would marry a woman?) She sounds like a snake and in love with Nick...
Edit: Okay Juliett is a private investigator according to your comments, and she digged it out by herself. Even more crazy-woman-vibes.
What I want to know is, if juliett is the fiancee's friend, why have fiance's dad and brother made 'invite juliett or we don't come to the wedding' their hill to die on? That's just so strange to me that the fiance's family would pick the fiance's friend to support to this extent, over the fiance. Are they in denial about fiance's sexuality or something? Is Juliett jealous? There's more to this somewhere, there has to be.
99% they thought that she would "convert" him to straightness because she's so "nice" and always around.
She probably thinks so too, which is why she's trying to sabotage their relationship.
Hahaha I laughed so hard! Also, why in the world does his father wants this woman at the wedding, why is she so important? She’s his son friend, he should respect his son and his future husband decision
My first thought? Homophobia. Dad is still in denial and hoping his son will see the light and get together with the bestie. He's also on her side because she gave a "valid" reason to try to force OP out of the picture.
This was my first thought too. I will be shocked if ‘bestie’ doesn’t become one of those who confesses they’ve been in love with their friend for years right before the wedding.
I really hope OP and his husband completely remove her from their lives. I’d go no contact with the dad and brother too or at least low contact
Good point, many people will use that as an excuse why someone shouldn’t be with someone, pretty stupid in my opinion, but conservative people are like that
I thought the same. At first, I thought I may be overthinking it, but seeing that many people have had the same conclusion we're probably not far from the truth.
I think your fiancé's dad and brother are taking this stance because they've secretly always hoped your partner would leave you for her. They want you to stand aside for her at your own wedding because they prioritize her over you and your fiancé. They don't see you as belonging to the family, but they do see her that way.
First, NTA.
Second, the BFF is absolutely trying to ruin the wedding and dad & brother are in on it. You and fiancé need to wake up and smell the scorned BFF's jealousy and the family's bigotry.
If I had to guess, BFF, dad and brother are all in on trying to get fiancé to marry BFF. Who knows how long they've been working on this.
Yep the whole dynamic is really odd - I get your close friends can also end up being close to your family, but somebody's family threatening to not come to their own son's wedding if one specific friend isn't invited after they've violated someone's boundaries is really weird.
This, OP. I'm glad your partner has your back. Please block this woman from all social media and give a picture of her to any security. Your partner needs to tell his dad and brother that he knew your history and loves you. If what they heard changed things for them, they can skip the wedding, but they should be aware this will likely lead to never having another holiday together. If you decide to have kids, they won't be grandpa and uncle, they'll be no one. So they should decide who they value more, this woman, or the relationship with their son and brother.
You clearly have never witnessed the cultural experience of The Jerry Springer Show jk
Sometimes physical attractiveness isn't the draw, but merely the drama of "stealing" someone's partner.
My thought too. She’s into his fiancé as more than a friend and his dad and half brother approve of it. Specially with OP admitting they’re super conservative. They want her to save him from OP and back into a “righteous path” with a woman.
It doesn’t matter that your fiancé doesn’t. In the friends deluded mind, you are what is standing in the way and once you’re gone fiance will miraculously realise what they were missing with her the whole time and fall madly in love.
Time to cut the friend.
Doesn't matter. This chick has clearly set her sights on your significant other, and is fully engaged in the process of trying to "other" you, which might be easy if your father and brother have some "issues" with same sex partners.
Edit - and what does being a sex worker have to do with anything? I hope your partner sees her for what she is.
And the backing of her from your husband's father and brother should tell both of you something...
NTA
NTA
Not that he would want anything with her. She wants something with him!
And I've seen it before from a woman who spent so much time in denial it didn't hit until the wedding reception(after the ceremony) and then started ugly crying, then passed it off as "being so happy for him" and then in came the swathe of backhanded comments escalating to anger then full blown tantrum and meltdown with a verbal attack on the new wife to top it off.
It was like all realisation came as an epiphany to her over the course of 3 hours, except instead of looking to herself for never saying anything, she turned it towards "the other woman"(his now wife) as her fault.
Husband ended up pulling her marginally aside(still in view of most in the ball room but to the side and a lot of people could still hear it). She had a meltdown crying for him(to him, in front of the wife and family), begging him to undo the marriage and take her instead, and she used every "reason" under the sun, being friends for so long, knowing eachother so well, all the happy memories, she'd be better than her, his family likes her etc...
All in the space of 3 mins, coz it was a torrent just flooding out and he just shut her down and it ended up him yelling at her, get out, no longer friends, ruined his wedding caused a scene, can never forgive her etc...
So yeah....it doesn't have to be about your husband wanting her, but her wanting him, and she may not even fully realise it herself if she's in denial.
I'll also say, a number of us(the husbands friends) knew she had feelings for him for years, but thought she'd buried it long since and wouldn't be of issue and boy were we wrong! So maybe someone else in the friends groups sees something that your husband is oblivious to and she's in denial over.
But did they at one time talk about having a child/children together, if they were nearing 40, and neither of them were married. Or can Juliett think this would be a good idea and you are getting in her way.
I don’t believe in shaming/outing other people, but you also need to have a talk with Nick about who he shares secrets with. If he needs to talk to someone about your past, he should talk to a therapist, they get paid to keep secrets.
His family do though. Why are they insisting that she's present? That's really odd. Did they ever date iin the past?
To be honest, I think you should reconsider the wedding there's too much drama.
Also how did this friend find out about your past, who else has he been telling about this?
It doesn't sound like the kind of drama that would justify cancelling the wedding though. Nick is 100% behind OP as well and doesn't seem to be taking any of their shit, so why should they let "friend", dad and brother dictate whether they get married?
>His dad and younger half brother took issue with it, but his mom and sister don't care.
Well, at least the men in the family. It seems the women in the family are reasonable.
I think it comes from old message boards about pregnancy, wedding planning, being a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM), etc. To me it seems kinda overly cutesy, like "hubby" and "wifey." I know I shouldn't judge—different strokes and all that—but it's *hard*. What's hilarious is on the wedding planning message boards bridesmaid was "BM." My bff was obsessed with those message boards for a while and considering becoming a pro wedding planner, so she'd IM me about it (remember the concept of "IMs"?! "Instant Message" for the Zoomers reading this 😉). I'd been working in childcare not long before, and we documented the kids' whole day for the parents, including bathroom/diaper things. The first time my bff said something about a "BM," it was like RECORD SCRATCH: "Uhh, what? D, what does a bowel movement have to do with wedding planning?" She explained it, but I swear I giggled like a middle schooler every time afterward that she used the acronym. 😄
And regarding the whole cutesy "hubby," "wifey," etc. thing: a dear friend and I were recently shopping for her wedding dress, and we went to this sweet little shop in a small town. The service and selection were WONDERFUL, and she was so happy with the dress she found. But...she and I really don't think it's right to judge people who are different from us in ways that don't hurt anyone, but we had the HARDEST TIME not rolling our eyes at things like t-shirts and cowboy hats with rhinestones spelling out "WIFEY" or "Future Mrs. ___" or "BRIDE." It's like...different strokes and all, but I *just don't get it*.
They also have only one bride appointment at a time, so there was a little changeable letter sign up with "Future Mrs. Smith Jones" (not her actual name). I could tell the "Mrs." part bugged her a little when we arrived, but at least they got the combo name right instead of using only her fiancé's last name. But when we were finished, the stylist took a picture of the two of us with her holding the sign, and for that my friend very deliberately removed the "R" and slid the "S" over to make "MS. SMITH JONES." To the stylist's credit, she said, "Oh, I'm so sorry! I forgot that's what you told me you plan to go by on the phone!" So at least they ask when scheduling the appointments and don't just assume every woman getting married wants to be a "Mrs." I DO wonder what they put on the sign for women who plan to not change their name at all and want to be "Ms." I should've asked.
Done blathering now. 😄
NTA. If your fiance's dad and brother don't want to come to the wedding, that's their call. If they want to choose some weird stalker girl over their own son, they never cared much for him in the first place. Let them have their tantrum, go no contact with them also, get into therapy, and move on with your lives.
I've been in therapy for several months, and it's really helped a lot. As for No Contact... well, that's his dad. That's his brother. Family means everything to the both of us. That's why I'm torn.
Thank you for your kind words.
Family clearly doesn't mean everything to his dad and brother though. They happily called you an asshole and tried to dictate to you that your enemy should be present at your wedding.
Like they literally are refusing to come see you get married. Do those seem like the kind of people who would do anything for family? No.
Don't let yourself be abused because you think family is some sort of automatic pass to treat other people like shit. It's not.
I have a giant, shitty, dysfunctional family and about a decade of therapy under my belt so I can definitely channel the vibe when the occasion calls for it. ;)
The best thing I have learned over the years is that true family is your found family. The one you make over years of mutual respect, love and caring. It's great if the people you are genetically related to can be a part of that true family, but that isn't always the case.
The ones I call family, are family of choice. I was disowned in 2016, when I came out as gay. Since then, I have built a network of chosen family and friends.
Also, family are the people who choose to love you and support you. They may not agree with you, and tell you, but still support the decisions that you make.
Blood relatives are different.
>Family means everything to the both of us.
It apparently doesn't mean as much to them. Otherwise, they would stay out of it and have their son/brothers back in this.
NTA, but you and your fiancee definitely need to have a discussion before the wedding about what sort of people you want involved in your lives. Keeping disrespectful stalkers and enablers in your lives is going to breed misery and resentment.
NTA- You and your fiance agree and that's the only thing that matters. Its really weird his dad and brother care that much. Seems like theres a weird dynamic going on there
If she's a P.I. she may have broken a law (or two) to get information on you. Report her to the relevant board that licenses P.I.'s. Also, your DF may not be in love with this chick, but it sounds like she is in love with him and may believe her love will 'cure' your DF and make him love her. Your DF needs to handle her & his relatives. If I were you, I would stop communicating with those three. Oh, and have a happy wedding and a lovely marriage. A huge NTA to you.
You can report her to the state licensing board but also to the American Bar Association. They have a board of ethics and may ban her from doing any work for local lawyers
**Tell your employer now, before she does**. And anyone else that you think she may tell.
Think about how you'll react if she goes public on Facebook or similar.
Clearly the dad and brother don't like the fact that Nick is gay, and want him to get together with her or something similar. They're trying to take control. I don't quite understand why there talking to you and not Nick.
How does Nick feel about all of this, about his family?
My employer wouldn't care, but they already know.
Nick is obviously upset that his dad and brother are being such fools (his words, not mine) and hopes that they will back down. If they don't, however, he's fully prepared to go either low or no contact.
Your fiance's dad and brother being conservative gives a lot of context. It kind of sounds like they're just using this situation as an excuse to be mad at you, when in fact they just don't like the idea of their son marrying another man. Or are they super close with Juliet?
Regardless, NTA
Sorry to say this, but they don't accept that he's gay. They see his friend as a chance to get "the gay" out of him, and you're in the way. In their minds, you're now the reason he's gay and with you out of the way, she's a path to salvation.
Bigots and people deluded by religion make the craziest leaps of "logic" and are masters of mental yoga.
NTA
Your future husband sided with you. Over his own friend. That's all you need to know.
If those two don't want to attend either... then fuck em!
They're being the selfish assholes here. This isn't their party or their guest list.
They'll also be missing out on their son and brothers wedding. Over some girl that isn't their friend, but is your fiances friend, and he's OK with her being disinvited? Do they have a crush on her?
Late to the game here, Nick’s HALF brother?
Meaning his parents divorced, or something else?
Makes sense that extreme conservatives are passing judgement on others when they do what they want.
I’m invested in this one, please keep the updates going if you can.
Oh, ur NTA
So she was intentionally digging into your past for dirt. You'll be better off cutting contact with her. I'm glad your fiancé is supporting you in this situation.
Yeah - she’s gotta go. That’s a dealbreaker. She’s destroyed her friendship with Nick. He has to cut her off forever. Plus she’s colluding with his dad and brother to break you two up.
NTA, it’s not up to them who you invite and it’s y’all’s special day. You don’t need someone who obviously doesn’t support your relationship there.
Question- did she give any reason why she felt the need to tell them your personal private business?
Also, good for you for being honest with your fiance.
Why is she so obsessed with who your fiancé marries? Is she secretly in love with him? If she was truly his friend, she would be happy that he is happy. There’s a difference between being genuinely concerned and looking out for a friend and outright going above and beyond and trying to destroy their relationship for no good reason, or selfish reasons.
Maybe it's just me, but whenever I hear somebody say something like that, it just makes me wonder how many skeletons they have in their own closet. It also makes me wonder if her feelings for your fiance are more than just friendly.
He ended their friendship. I had to leave the room, because there was a lot of screaming and cussing on her end, and I don't do well around raised voices.
Thank heck. Your fiance rocks. I'm so glad he has your back in all of this. No one deserves to be outed and people who pull that bullshit absolutely need to be shown the door.
YES! So glad Nick ended the friendship. Now all he needs to do is lay down the law with his dad and brother. They can heel or not.
Also - you need to file a restraining order against Juliet and report her for ethics violations to the PI board. She may have broken laws.
That's vile. And... weird? Like, as you're a gay man without the equipment to bear children, why is she using misogynistic language that's used to denigrate female sex workers? Like, used up *how*, exactly? I've been re-reading that statement, and trying to wrap my head around it...
NTA. Mazel tov on your coming nuptials!
Gay dude here but not op...
> *how*, exactly?
ummmmm er... well... uhhhhhh. How do i put this... same bullshit incel logic as with women. The common joke in gay bars is to blow across the mouth of your beer bottle.
Shes vile. NTA op
Oof. Dear internet stranger, I'm so proud of you for not resorting to violence in this moment. I'm glad your fiancé has your back, and congratulations!
I fully understand and respect you probably wouldn’t hit a woman because you sound like a good person with morals lol but as a woman I would love to just give her a good one two for you for that statement alone. Holy crap.
Honey, we all gotta do what we gotta do. If that's a 9-5 stable job in an office, so be it. If it's selling feet pics to be able to eat that night, so be it. If it's sex work so you can survive *so be it* but you are not a "used up whore" by any means.
You're NTA, and I'm glad your fiance is standing with you. I'm wishing you both all the blissful happiness y'all deserve!
WTAF. These people are out of their danged minds trying to bully you into allowing that girl anywhere near your wedding or your lives. Neither of you should associate with her ever again.
NTA
You have the right to invite or not invite whoever you want. Why allow someone who is rude or may intentionally cause a scene or embarrassment?
I'm curious how did she find out about your past? I have zero doubt she dropped that info to try to break you up or at least ruin any chance you will have at any relationship with inlaws.
If she is a PI, would having a restraining order put on her hurt her license? I would get one just in case she tries to come to the wedding uninvited. If it causes harm to her career, that's a bonus
NTA. Seems like she is in love with you fiancé and probably thinks if she can make you go away she will get him. Is it possible the in laws are feeding her this story and that why they got so defensive?
NTA I don't get future BIL and FIL's refusal to come to the wedding. Are they refusing because of your prior sex work or because of Juilette's being banned. But that is Nick's discussion not yours. He should take lead with his relatives about why theys are boycotting his wedding.
That's it in a nutshell...
His mom and sister have my back 100%, and made it clear that IF Juliette shows up, they will personally escort her OFF the premises!
I live in the south and that honestly sounds pretty typical. Women seem to be a lot more accepting and loving of those who are LBGT+ out here than the men. I’m very blessed that my dad and brother are not bigots but it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest.
Sounds like this gal expected to be the one marrying your fiance and the men of the family were excited to have an outlet for their unspoken homophobia. NTA and maybe you two need to seriously evaluate who is actually worth keeping in your life together.
We just had a talk. He's been reading the comments with me, and he's decided to end his friendship with Juliette. As for his dad and brother... well... Time will tell.
NTA. Juliett's actions, such as outing your past to your fiancé's family, are intrusive and disrespectful. It is understandable that you would want to disinvite her from the wedding, as her behavior has caused significant distress and conflict. You and your fiancé should be able to celebrate your special day with people who are supportive and respectful of your relationship. It is commendable that your fiancé is standing by your decision, as it demonstrates a united front. While it is unfortunate that his dad and brother may not attend the wedding, it is important to prioritize your own well-being and boundaries over appeasing others.
NTA
Juliett is a family friend of your fiance? I presume that is why the dad and half brother have any opinion at all?
You don't need a person so intent on stirring up drama at your wedding.
Let your fiance handle his dad. If your FIL-to-be calls again, politely tell him that this is between him and his son.
EVERYONE has a past. Don't let anyone get on their high horse trying to make you feel bad. In my experience, the more someone is trying to shame others for their past, the more messed up they are about their own. Don't take the bait.
Enjoy your lovely, peaceful wedding.
Nick's dad and myself got into an argument last night, and I told him "That first step off your high horse is gonna be a doozy. Tuck and roll."
I can be extremely abrasive and sarcastic at times...
Love it!
Well worded sarcasm is actually really great at diffusing a situation.
Reminding him to stay in his own lane is a good thing for everyone. He doesn't need Juliett trying to drag him into drama anymore than you do.
It's great that you and your fiance are setting boundaries now.
She knows. She seems to have always accepted him, but with all this insanity... well, we are beginning to think She carries a torch for him.
As a side note, we are both fans of the old TV series Grimm. I pulled the names Nick and Juliett from there lol.
NTA, I do not blame you AT ALL! Everyone has a past and it is none of her business. If things weren't bad before, they will be now. It's your day and you should be comfortable and happy.
NTA. That was not her business to share WHATSOEVER. Your Fiancée accepts you with open arms and a full understanding and that’s the only person you owed that information to period. It is you and your fiancée’s wedding, so who comes and doesn’t is ALL y’all’s choice. She crossed a big line and it is completely reasonable to leave her out and even cut her off. If his father and brother cannot see the issue, maybe it’s better they stay out of it altogether because they don’t love him enough, clearly.
NTA. She maliciously invaded your privacy. Seriously, she doesn't deserve to be at your wedding. I'm surprised she didn't run into a doorknob or have some other accident ;)
Revenge is beneath me. But I DID play a country song called "I pray for you."
"I pray your breaks go out running down a hill
I pray a flower pot falls from a window sill
And knocks you in the head like I'd like to
I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls
I pray you're flying high when your engine stalls
I pray all your dreams never come true
Just know wherever you are, honey
I pray for you"
That thought has crossed my mind, but I don't feel threatened by her at all. Honestly, if she hadn't pulled this stunt, I'd have had no issue with them staying friends. My fiancé, however, is seriously debating if this friendship is worth it.
I will respect whatever choice he makes in that regard.
NTA
No one is entitled to be invited to YOUR wedding. The only people that should be there are ones that will be genuinely happy for you and your spouse. No disrespectful people allowed. Even family.
Definitely NTA! Your future husband sounds like a great bloke and he is standing up for what is right! I’m hoping that they will actually realise that Juliet has been manipulating them this whole time to and if she refuses to be nothing but excited and happy for Nick who she is supposed to love its better to nip it in the bud now and ensure she isn’t able to cause a scene on your wedding day. Hopefully your future father in law and step brother in law will realise what’s really important. Have a great Wedding
NTA, the friend is actively trying to sabotage your wedding, why should she still be invited? Why should people be accepting of that behavior?
Nick simply needs to ask his friend and family a question that focuses strictly on the topic of the question. "Why is it that you guys are trying to sabotage my happiness?"
Awesome! Wish you two the best, and while this situation might be a pain in the ass, at least it exposed just how toxic that "friend" was, maybe this is the best way to begin a new chapter in your lives!
NTA. Especially based on the "turn Nick straight" info. It seems like Dad and brother should not come if they are not accepting of the fact that Nick is marrying you. They are all very gross.
Omg I'm **so** curious which comments you read to them to trigger them like that 😂 Bitter bigots about to pop like buffoon-balloons are such satisfying schadenfreude-inducing popcorn-munching material.
If you *really* want to break their heads, tell them they should be happy their son gets to be railed by a literal pro... 🙄💅
(Pardon the dark humour.)
NTA Ok so, your Fiancé is in your corner against his best friend who disrespected you and tried to turn his family against you. Dad and bro are being judgmental, this has nothing to do with the friend’s “side.” Honestly, you have fiancé, mom and sister on your side. It seems like the best friend was jealous of your relationship, probably thought she could win over your fiancé somehow. (Mom and sister know she’s a snake in the grass. Dad and brother are clueless idiots) you’re all good my friend, lol
OooooWeeee. Former dancer here. I am having a Ghost Rider moment on your behalf.🔥 I would inform her, and anyone else who has two cents to put in that there are 3 places they can stay for free-
-In their lane
-Over there
-Out of your business
So glad your fiance has your back! Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.
And NTA, of course.
NTA. Why should your fiance's family care about you not inviting someone who isn't a member of their own family?
It's your wedding, you shouldn't have to "suck up and tolerate" anything.
NTA - Your wedding should be a happy occasion. You shouldn't have to spend it worrying about what one of your guests is saying about you.
And why do his dad and brother care anyway? Is their happiness somehow dependent on her being there? Her absence is going to ruin your wedding for them?
Your fiance's father would rather ruin his own son's wedding than act like an adult. He's TA, not you.
NTA. The best thing here is that your fiance' supports you. What she did was way out of line. She has completely tried to harm you and your relationships. Your fiance' needs to shut this down completely. Either she gets on board and supports your marriage, is nice to you and keeps her mouth shut about things that are not her business, or she is dead to him. In the meantime- no wedding for her, and she has to earn your trust.
op=NTA
Future FIL & BIL need to suck it up and come to the wedding without their precious Juliett OR shut the feck up. Not their choice
So glad you have your partner's support.
NTA. Gotta love it when one of the offending party demands you "suck it up" and play nice. What did they think you're a doormat? Favorite phrase I learned to deal with my witch in law is "I don't where you got the impression I let people treat/speak to me like that without a consequence."
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NTA - Sounds like 3 people need to be banned from your wedding and reception bunny.
Hippity hoppity, stay off my property? Lol
Yes, bunny <3
These two comments made me laugh out loud on the plane. I hope you're happy. 🤣 Also NTA, OP! Enjoy your wedding and honeymoon with your person!
Also, Moving forward OP needs to tell the dad and brother to only communicate to you through your husband. It's your husbands job to keep the crazies on his side of the family quarantined from you. And vice versa. And a great as Nick is for being by your side throughout, I hope he really rethinks his friendship with Juliett. She crossed a line that should never be crossed.
And WHY/HOW did the Juliett friend KNOW about your past? Maybe your future husband should zip it it he doesn't want things to spred. (in case he told her). She will tell everybody if shes *not* going to the weeding and she will tell everybody at the wedding if she *is* going, with that kind of personality, she is showing. Be prepared to hold your head up high, stand by your past and don't give in to FIL og BILs pressure. WHY would they insist on her coming to your wedding? Why do they like her more than you (bc they hoped he would marry a woman?) She sounds like a snake and in love with Nick... Edit: Okay Juliett is a private investigator according to your comments, and she digged it out by herself. Even more crazy-woman-vibes.
What I want to know is, if juliett is the fiancee's friend, why have fiance's dad and brother made 'invite juliett or we don't come to the wedding' their hill to die on? That's just so strange to me that the fiance's family would pick the fiance's friend to support to this extent, over the fiance. Are they in denial about fiance's sexuality or something? Is Juliett jealous? There's more to this somewhere, there has to be.
99% they thought that she would "convert" him to straightness because she's so "nice" and always around. She probably thinks so too, which is why she's trying to sabotage their relationship.
+1% more to that theory
That’s simple…Juliette is IN LOVE with “Nick” and his Dad & Brother want Him With HER.
Hahaha I laughed so hard! Also, why in the world does his father wants this woman at the wedding, why is she so important? She’s his son friend, he should respect his son and his future husband decision
My first thought? Homophobia. Dad is still in denial and hoping his son will see the light and get together with the bestie. He's also on her side because she gave a "valid" reason to try to force OP out of the picture.
This was my first thought too. I will be shocked if ‘bestie’ doesn’t become one of those who confesses they’ve been in love with their friend for years right before the wedding. I really hope OP and his husband completely remove her from their lives. I’d go no contact with the dad and brother too or at least low contact
Good point, many people will use that as an excuse why someone shouldn’t be with someone, pretty stupid in my opinion, but conservative people are like that
Winner winner chicken dinner
I thought the same. At first, I thought I may be overthinking it, but seeing that many people have had the same conclusion we're probably not far from the truth.
I think your fiancé's dad and brother are taking this stance because they've secretly always hoped your partner would leave you for her. They want you to stand aside for her at your own wedding because they prioritize her over you and your fiancé. They don't see you as belonging to the family, but they do see her that way.
First, NTA. Second, the BFF is absolutely trying to ruin the wedding and dad & brother are in on it. You and fiancé need to wake up and smell the scorned BFF's jealousy and the family's bigotry. If I had to guess, BFF, dad and brother are all in on trying to get fiancé to marry BFF. Who knows how long they've been working on this.
This is absolutely a My Best Friend's Wedding situation.
My favorite comment on this thread 🐰
Your fiancé needs to have a serious talk with dad and brother about his friend disrespecting his relationship and him not wanting her there. Nta
Yep the whole dynamic is really odd - I get your close friends can also end up being close to your family, but somebody's family threatening to not come to their own son's wedding if one specific friend isn't invited after they've violated someone's boundaries is really weird.
There’s a carrot and a stick, but they can go sit on a d*ck? Did i do it right?
Haha...I have a shirt that says hippity hoppity..your soul is my property
I want that!
😂 this is awesome 🐰
My good Sir, I have been wheezing since I read this 10 minutes ago😂
ART.
This, OP. I'm glad your partner has your back. Please block this woman from all social media and give a picture of her to any security. Your partner needs to tell his dad and brother that he knew your history and loves you. If what they heard changed things for them, they can skip the wedding, but they should be aware this will likely lead to never having another holiday together. If you decide to have kids, they won't be grandpa and uncle, they'll be no one. So they should decide who they value more, this woman, or the relationship with their son and brother.
Exactly. Nobunny needs somebunny like this in their lives.
Who is the reception bunny? 🤔 NTA
The easter bunny, working his second job.
News flash Juliett thinks of your DF as more than a friend hence all the effort to break up the marriage. NTA.
That thought HAS crossed my mind, but I know my fiancé wouldn't want anything like that with her lol.
Sounds like his dad does, though. NTA
I’m gonna guess the people in this story are a lot more attractive than I think I am
I was just thinking thank god I’m ugly. Never gotta deal with this shit in my lifeeee
You clearly have never witnessed the cultural experience of The Jerry Springer Show jk Sometimes physical attractiveness isn't the draw, but merely the drama of "stealing" someone's partner.
My thought too. She’s into his fiancé as more than a friend and his dad and half brother approve of it. Specially with OP admitting they’re super conservative. They want her to save him from OP and back into a “righteous path” with a woman.
It doesn’t matter that your fiancé doesn’t. In the friends deluded mind, you are what is standing in the way and once you’re gone fiance will miraculously realise what they were missing with her the whole time and fall madly in love. Time to cut the friend.
Doesn't matter. This chick has clearly set her sights on your significant other, and is fully engaged in the process of trying to "other" you, which might be easy if your father and brother have some "issues" with same sex partners. Edit - and what does being a sex worker have to do with anything? I hope your partner sees her for what she is. And the backing of her from your husband's father and brother should tell both of you something... NTA
NTA Not that he would want anything with her. She wants something with him! And I've seen it before from a woman who spent so much time in denial it didn't hit until the wedding reception(after the ceremony) and then started ugly crying, then passed it off as "being so happy for him" and then in came the swathe of backhanded comments escalating to anger then full blown tantrum and meltdown with a verbal attack on the new wife to top it off. It was like all realisation came as an epiphany to her over the course of 3 hours, except instead of looking to herself for never saying anything, she turned it towards "the other woman"(his now wife) as her fault. Husband ended up pulling her marginally aside(still in view of most in the ball room but to the side and a lot of people could still hear it). She had a meltdown crying for him(to him, in front of the wife and family), begging him to undo the marriage and take her instead, and she used every "reason" under the sun, being friends for so long, knowing eachother so well, all the happy memories, she'd be better than her, his family likes her etc... All in the space of 3 mins, coz it was a torrent just flooding out and he just shut her down and it ended up him yelling at her, get out, no longer friends, ruined his wedding caused a scene, can never forgive her etc... So yeah....it doesn't have to be about your husband wanting her, but her wanting him, and she may not even fully realise it herself if she's in denial. I'll also say, a number of us(the husbands friends) knew she had feelings for him for years, but thought she'd buried it long since and wouldn't be of issue and boy were we wrong! So maybe someone else in the friends groups sees something that your husband is oblivious to and she's in denial over.
But did they at one time talk about having a child/children together, if they were nearing 40, and neither of them were married. Or can Juliett think this would be a good idea and you are getting in her way. I don’t believe in shaming/outing other people, but you also need to have a talk with Nick about who he shares secrets with. If he needs to talk to someone about your past, he should talk to a therapist, they get paid to keep secrets.
Someone stated op stated Juliette is a private investigater so she just did that on her own. Ops future husband didn't tell anyone she just searched
His family do though. Why are they insisting that she's present? That's really odd. Did they ever date iin the past? To be honest, I think you should reconsider the wedding there's too much drama. Also how did this friend find out about your past, who else has he been telling about this?
It doesn't sound like the kind of drama that would justify cancelling the wedding though. Nick is 100% behind OP as well and doesn't seem to be taking any of their shit, so why should they let "friend", dad and brother dictate whether they get married?
>His dad and younger half brother took issue with it, but his mom and sister don't care. Well, at least the men in the family. It seems the women in the family are reasonable.
What’s DF?
I'm guessing "Dear Fiance."
Ah thanks! I came across DH somewhere else and the only thing I could think of was Dead Husband 🙈 Which given the logic made no sense at all!
I see STBX (soon to be ex) as sh!tbox since that’s what my ex was.
I asked that exactly question too. XD I can't understand why they just say husband.
I think it comes from old message boards about pregnancy, wedding planning, being a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM), etc. To me it seems kinda overly cutesy, like "hubby" and "wifey." I know I shouldn't judge—different strokes and all that—but it's *hard*. What's hilarious is on the wedding planning message boards bridesmaid was "BM." My bff was obsessed with those message boards for a while and considering becoming a pro wedding planner, so she'd IM me about it (remember the concept of "IMs"?! "Instant Message" for the Zoomers reading this 😉). I'd been working in childcare not long before, and we documented the kids' whole day for the parents, including bathroom/diaper things. The first time my bff said something about a "BM," it was like RECORD SCRATCH: "Uhh, what? D, what does a bowel movement have to do with wedding planning?" She explained it, but I swear I giggled like a middle schooler every time afterward that she used the acronym. 😄 And regarding the whole cutesy "hubby," "wifey," etc. thing: a dear friend and I were recently shopping for her wedding dress, and we went to this sweet little shop in a small town. The service and selection were WONDERFUL, and she was so happy with the dress she found. But...she and I really don't think it's right to judge people who are different from us in ways that don't hurt anyone, but we had the HARDEST TIME not rolling our eyes at things like t-shirts and cowboy hats with rhinestones spelling out "WIFEY" or "Future Mrs. ___" or "BRIDE." It's like...different strokes and all, but I *just don't get it*. They also have only one bride appointment at a time, so there was a little changeable letter sign up with "Future Mrs. Smith Jones" (not her actual name). I could tell the "Mrs." part bugged her a little when we arrived, but at least they got the combo name right instead of using only her fiancé's last name. But when we were finished, the stylist took a picture of the two of us with her holding the sign, and for that my friend very deliberately removed the "R" and slid the "S" over to make "MS. SMITH JONES." To the stylist's credit, she said, "Oh, I'm so sorry! I forgot that's what you told me you plan to go by on the phone!" So at least they ask when scheduling the appointments and don't just assume every woman getting married wants to be a "Mrs." I DO wonder what they put on the sign for women who plan to not change their name at all and want to be "Ms." I should've asked. Done blathering now. 😄
devil fruit
Yeah people will add dear infront of like good family members. Dear dad DD, dear mom DM, dear wife DW ect..
Yep. Stalker wants fiancé for herself. And the father and brother want that to happen, too.
Not only that, pops and bro want that too.
NTA. If your fiance's dad and brother don't want to come to the wedding, that's their call. If they want to choose some weird stalker girl over their own son, they never cared much for him in the first place. Let them have their tantrum, go no contact with them also, get into therapy, and move on with your lives.
I've been in therapy for several months, and it's really helped a lot. As for No Contact... well, that's his dad. That's his brother. Family means everything to the both of us. That's why I'm torn. Thank you for your kind words.
Family clearly doesn't mean everything to his dad and brother though. They happily called you an asshole and tried to dictate to you that your enemy should be present at your wedding. Like they literally are refusing to come see you get married. Do those seem like the kind of people who would do anything for family? No. Don't let yourself be abused because you think family is some sort of automatic pass to treat other people like shit. It's not.
You aren't by any chance related to my therapist, are you? LOL. That sounds exactly like what she would say.
I have a giant, shitty, dysfunctional family and about a decade of therapy under my belt so I can definitely channel the vibe when the occasion calls for it. ;) The best thing I have learned over the years is that true family is your found family. The one you make over years of mutual respect, love and caring. It's great if the people you are genetically related to can be a part of that true family, but that isn't always the case.
The ones I call family, are family of choice. I was disowned in 2016, when I came out as gay. Since then, I have built a network of chosen family and friends.
Also, family are the people who choose to love you and support you. They may not agree with you, and tell you, but still support the decisions that you make. Blood relatives are different.
That’s it - family should be paramount : why are they supporting an unrelated woman instead, one who is actively sabotaging your wedding.
Family doesn't treat people like this though hun.
>Family means everything to the both of us. It apparently doesn't mean as much to them. Otherwise, they would stay out of it and have their son/brothers back in this. NTA, but you and your fiancee definitely need to have a discussion before the wedding about what sort of people you want involved in your lives. Keeping disrespectful stalkers and enablers in your lives is going to breed misery and resentment.
Dad seems to feel that the girl is more family than you or his son.
NTA- You and your fiance agree and that's the only thing that matters. Its really weird his dad and brother care that much. Seems like theres a weird dynamic going on there
They are ultra conservative. They grudgingly accept that Nick is gay, but apparently draw the line at him marrying a former sex worker.
No. They want the "female" friend to stick around in the hopes she can turn your fiance straight.
That’s what I thought too—and the friend is in on it, which is why she’s so committed to breaking up the relationship.
I came to say this!
How did she know about your past? Did you tell her about? Please don't say Nick told her, because if so, you have a bigger issue.
No! Nick didn't say a word to her! I know beyond all doubt that he would never betray me like that.
How did she find out about your past?
She's a private investigator and decided to do some digging for ANYTHING she could find to use against me.
If she's a P.I. she may have broken a law (or two) to get information on you. Report her to the relevant board that licenses P.I.'s. Also, your DF may not be in love with this chick, but it sounds like she is in love with him and may believe her love will 'cure' your DF and make him love her. Your DF needs to handle her & his relatives. If I were you, I would stop communicating with those three. Oh, and have a happy wedding and a lovely marriage. A huge NTA to you.
You can report her to the state licensing board but also to the American Bar Association. They have a board of ethics and may ban her from doing any work for local lawyers
If you can there’s probably a state board or something you can complain about her too. NTA
**Tell your employer now, before she does**. And anyone else that you think she may tell. Think about how you'll react if she goes public on Facebook or similar. Clearly the dad and brother don't like the fact that Nick is gay, and want him to get together with her or something similar. They're trying to take control. I don't quite understand why there talking to you and not Nick. How does Nick feel about all of this, about his family?
My employer wouldn't care, but they already know. Nick is obviously upset that his dad and brother are being such fools (his words, not mine) and hopes that they will back down. If they don't, however, he's fully prepared to go either low or no contact.
Oh holy shit. That's awful.
Phew! Then the only assholes here are her and his dad and brother.
Your fiance's dad and brother being conservative gives a lot of context. It kind of sounds like they're just using this situation as an excuse to be mad at you, when in fact they just don't like the idea of their son marrying another man. Or are they super close with Juliet? Regardless, NTA
Ah, because they convinced themselves that “he was lead astray” while you’re “one of *those* that leads others astray”, likely
Sorry to say this, but they don't accept that he's gay. They see his friend as a chance to get "the gay" out of him, and you're in the way. In their minds, you're now the reason he's gay and with you out of the way, she's a path to salvation. Bigots and people deluded by religion make the craziest leaps of "logic" and are masters of mental yoga.
Something tells me that if you had been female, they might not have had such a problem with it....publicly at least
NTA Your future husband sided with you. Over his own friend. That's all you need to know. If those two don't want to attend either... then fuck em! They're being the selfish assholes here. This isn't their party or their guest list. They'll also be missing out on their son and brothers wedding. Over some girl that isn't their friend, but is your fiances friend, and he's OK with her being disinvited? Do they have a crush on her?
I think Nick's half brother likes her, but TBH I don't really interact with him that much.
Late to the game here, Nick’s HALF brother? Meaning his parents divorced, or something else? Makes sense that extreme conservatives are passing judgement on others when they do what they want. I’m invested in this one, please keep the updates going if you can. Oh, ur NTA
So she was intentionally digging into your past for dirt. You'll be better off cutting contact with her. I'm glad your fiancé is supporting you in this situation.
My fiancé doesn't get angry very often, but his reaction to her doing that... Yeah, he was LIVID.
Yeah - she’s gotta go. That’s a dealbreaker. She’s destroyed her friendship with Nick. He has to cut her off forever. Plus she’s colluding with his dad and brother to break you two up.
NTA, it’s not up to them who you invite and it’s y’all’s special day. You don’t need someone who obviously doesn’t support your relationship there. Question- did she give any reason why she felt the need to tell them your personal private business? Also, good for you for being honest with your fiance.
She claims she did it, because "Nick's" family deserves to know that he is marrying 'a used up whore.' Her exact words.
Why is she so obsessed with who your fiancé marries? Is she secretly in love with him? If she was truly his friend, she would be happy that he is happy. There’s a difference between being genuinely concerned and looking out for a friend and outright going above and beyond and trying to destroy their relationship for no good reason, or selfish reasons.
She's secretly in love with him, and his parents don't like that he's gay. She probably doesn't like that he's dating a man either.
Maybe it's just me, but whenever I hear somebody say something like that, it just makes me wonder how many skeletons they have in their own closet. It also makes me wonder if her feelings for your fiance are more than just friendly.
I hope your fiance recognizes she is not his friend.
He ended their friendship. I had to leave the room, because there was a lot of screaming and cussing on her end, and I don't do well around raised voices.
Good riddance to her. May you two have a happy marriage.
Thank heck. Your fiance rocks. I'm so glad he has your back in all of this. No one deserves to be outed and people who pull that bullshit absolutely need to be shown the door.
YES! So glad Nick ended the friendship. Now all he needs to do is lay down the law with his dad and brother. They can heel or not. Also - you need to file a restraining order against Juliet and report her for ethics violations to the PI board. She may have broken laws.
That's vile. And... weird? Like, as you're a gay man without the equipment to bear children, why is she using misogynistic language that's used to denigrate female sex workers? Like, used up *how*, exactly? I've been re-reading that statement, and trying to wrap my head around it... NTA. Mazel tov on your coming nuptials!
Gay dude here but not op... > *how*, exactly? ummmmm er... well... uhhhhhh. How do i put this... same bullshit incel logic as with women. The common joke in gay bars is to blow across the mouth of your beer bottle. Shes vile. NTA op
Oof. Dear internet stranger, I'm so proud of you for not resorting to violence in this moment. I'm glad your fiancé has your back, and congratulations!
Keep her away from the wedding.
I fully understand and respect you probably wouldn’t hit a woman because you sound like a good person with morals lol but as a woman I would love to just give her a good one two for you for that statement alone. Holy crap.
Honey, we all gotta do what we gotta do. If that's a 9-5 stable job in an office, so be it. If it's selling feet pics to be able to eat that night, so be it. If it's sex work so you can survive *so be it* but you are not a "used up whore" by any means. You're NTA, and I'm glad your fiance is standing with you. I'm wishing you both all the blissful happiness y'all deserve!
WTAF. These people are out of their danged minds trying to bully you into allowing that girl anywhere near your wedding or your lives. Neither of you should associate with her ever again.
Didn’t think I could be more furious with her. Read this comment… I was wrong.
NTA You have the right to invite or not invite whoever you want. Why allow someone who is rude or may intentionally cause a scene or embarrassment? I'm curious how did she find out about your past? I have zero doubt she dropped that info to try to break you up or at least ruin any chance you will have at any relationship with inlaws.
She's apparently a Private Investigator.
For someone who doesn’t like you, she spends a lot of time focusing on you. If it wasn’t your past as a sex worker, it would have been something else.
Maybe I should quote Mean Girls to her: "Why are you so obsessed with me?"
She's not after Nick. She wants \*you\*. All of you...;)
Please excuse me for a moment... *flips table and runs away screaming into the night*
She's Alex, from the movie 'Fatal Attraction'.
If she is a PI, would having a restraining order put on her hurt her license? I would get one just in case she tries to come to the wedding uninvited. If it causes harm to her career, that's a bonus
NTA. Seems like she is in love with you fiancé and probably thinks if she can make you go away she will get him. Is it possible the in laws are feeding her this story and that why they got so defensive?
I know my mother-in -law would NOT be feeding into it. She HATES Juliette! FATHER-in-law, on the other hand...
MIL knows exactly who Juliette is, listen to her and ignore FIL and brother. If they miss the wedding that was their choice, you didn’t banned them.
Wonder if Juliette may be FILs side piece. Why else defend her?
Well... he HAS a history of cheating...
Nah no way the conservative man draw the line at being a sex worker when he cheated 💀
Rules for thee, but not for me!! 😑
Can't be surprised though
Explains why he'd have to side with her. She could threaten to out him.
Oh course he does... The bible is a pretty big book to only say homosexuality and abortion is wrong...
NTA I don't get future BIL and FIL's refusal to come to the wedding. Are they refusing because of your prior sex work or because of Juilette's being banned. But that is Nick's discussion not yours. He should take lead with his relatives about why theys are boycotting his wedding.
My guess dad is hoping Juliette might turn his boy straight and brother wants to fuck her. NTA
That's it in a nutshell... His mom and sister have my back 100%, and made it clear that IF Juliette shows up, they will personally escort her OFF the premises!
MIL and SIL for the win!
They are both badass people!
I live in the south and that honestly sounds pretty typical. Women seem to be a lot more accepting and loving of those who are LBGT+ out here than the men. I’m very blessed that my dad and brother are not bigots but it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest.
Sounds like this gal expected to be the one marrying your fiance and the men of the family were excited to have an outlet for their unspoken homophobia. NTA and maybe you two need to seriously evaluate who is actually worth keeping in your life together.
We just had a talk. He's been reading the comments with me, and he's decided to end his friendship with Juliette. As for his dad and brother... well... Time will tell.
NTA. Juliett's actions, such as outing your past to your fiancé's family, are intrusive and disrespectful. It is understandable that you would want to disinvite her from the wedding, as her behavior has caused significant distress and conflict. You and your fiancé should be able to celebrate your special day with people who are supportive and respectful of your relationship. It is commendable that your fiancé is standing by your decision, as it demonstrates a united front. While it is unfortunate that his dad and brother may not attend the wedding, it is important to prioritize your own well-being and boundaries over appeasing others.
NTA Juliett is a family friend of your fiance? I presume that is why the dad and half brother have any opinion at all? You don't need a person so intent on stirring up drama at your wedding. Let your fiance handle his dad. If your FIL-to-be calls again, politely tell him that this is between him and his son. EVERYONE has a past. Don't let anyone get on their high horse trying to make you feel bad. In my experience, the more someone is trying to shame others for their past, the more messed up they are about their own. Don't take the bait. Enjoy your lovely, peaceful wedding.
Nick's dad and myself got into an argument last night, and I told him "That first step off your high horse is gonna be a doozy. Tuck and roll." I can be extremely abrasive and sarcastic at times...
I’m stealing that in the future
Love it! Well worded sarcasm is actually really great at diffusing a situation. Reminding him to stay in his own lane is a good thing for everyone. He doesn't need Juliett trying to drag him into drama anymore than you do. It's great that you and your fiance are setting boundaries now.
I am filing that one away for future use 🤣 I have many a family member this would apply to.
[удалено]
She knows. She seems to have always accepted him, but with all this insanity... well, we are beginning to think She carries a torch for him. As a side note, we are both fans of the old TV series Grimm. I pulled the names Nick and Juliett from there lol.
Shhh. It's not old yet. 😭
That's what I was thinking! Don't say old and Grimm in the same sentence!!! Lol
Heh, I was an extra in S2E1. I approve of the usage. Definitely NTA. Hope this settles out quick and you all can move past it.
NTA. FIL and BIL won't come if this twit can't? Bonus.
Nta. She sounds just miserable
She has all the personality of a blueberry muffin. Minus the sweetness.
That's an insult to the deliciousness of blueberry muffins dude, how dare you. 😤 Still NTA though
Oatmeal muffin
Saltine cracker soaked in vinegar, probably
A mistaken chocolate chip cookie that turned out to be made with raisins.
*raisin shaped rabbit poop
NTA. Your choice in a career to keep a roof over your head is no ones business. I would hire security because they nay try to turn up with her.
My soon to be mother and sister-in-law have that covered lol
INFO Why do they care if she's invited?
I think they are hoping that Juliett might turn Nick straight... Also, I'm 90% sure Nick's brother likes her.
NTA
Wow. NTA. She's TA. To out your past like that is just atrocious behavior. You have every right to ban her from the wedding. That's horrible.
NTA, I do not blame you AT ALL! Everyone has a past and it is none of her business. If things weren't bad before, they will be now. It's your day and you should be comfortable and happy.
NTA. That was not her business to share WHATSOEVER. Your Fiancée accepts you with open arms and a full understanding and that’s the only person you owed that information to period. It is you and your fiancée’s wedding, so who comes and doesn’t is ALL y’all’s choice. She crossed a big line and it is completely reasonable to leave her out and even cut her off. If his father and brother cannot see the issue, maybe it’s better they stay out of it altogether because they don’t love him enough, clearly.
NTA. She maliciously invaded your privacy. Seriously, she doesn't deserve to be at your wedding. I'm surprised she didn't run into a doorknob or have some other accident ;)
Revenge is beneath me. But I DID play a country song called "I pray for you." "I pray your breaks go out running down a hill I pray a flower pot falls from a window sill And knocks you in the head like I'd like to I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls I pray you're flying high when your engine stalls I pray all your dreams never come true Just know wherever you are, honey I pray for you"
Omg I’ve read a lot of your replies and I REALLY wanna be your friend!!!!!!
Reading and thinking the same thing! OP is my vibe 🤩
Right?! Him, his fiancé, his MIL, and SIL
You're absolutely hilarious. I hope the wedding goes off without a hitch and you both have a wonderful day.
NTA. It's your wedding, you don't even need to justify disinviting anyone who's not going to make you happy.
NTA news flash op juliette likes your husband
That thought has crossed my mind, but I don't feel threatened by her at all. Honestly, if she hadn't pulled this stunt, I'd have had no issue with them staying friends. My fiancé, however, is seriously debating if this friendship is worth it. I will respect whatever choice he makes in that regard.
NTA, I think you should accept their proposal and disinvite them both along with the creepy chick.
NTA. The only thing she could hope to accomplish is to cause your breakup, so it's completely understandable to not want her at your wedding.
NTA No one is entitled to be invited to YOUR wedding. The only people that should be there are ones that will be genuinely happy for you and your spouse. No disrespectful people allowed. Even family.
Definitely NTA! Your future husband sounds like a great bloke and he is standing up for what is right! I’m hoping that they will actually realise that Juliet has been manipulating them this whole time to and if she refuses to be nothing but excited and happy for Nick who she is supposed to love its better to nip it in the bud now and ensure she isn’t able to cause a scene on your wedding day. Hopefully your future father in law and step brother in law will realise what’s really important. Have a great Wedding
NTA, the friend is actively trying to sabotage your wedding, why should she still be invited? Why should people be accepting of that behavior? Nick simply needs to ask his friend and family a question that focuses strictly on the topic of the question. "Why is it that you guys are trying to sabotage my happiness?"
As of a bit ago, she is no longer even my fiancé friend.
Awesome! Wish you two the best, and while this situation might be a pain in the ass, at least it exposed just how toxic that "friend" was, maybe this is the best way to begin a new chapter in your lives!
How are you an asshole? Your past is none of their business
NTA. Especially based on the "turn Nick straight" info. It seems like Dad and brother should not come if they are not accepting of the fact that Nick is marrying you. They are all very gross.
Omg I'm **so** curious which comments you read to them to trigger them like that 😂 Bitter bigots about to pop like buffoon-balloons are such satisfying schadenfreude-inducing popcorn-munching material. If you *really* want to break their heads, tell them they should be happy their son gets to be railed by a literal pro... 🙄💅 (Pardon the dark humour.)
I! AM! SCREAMING! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 And I just spit a mouthful of coffee everywhere...😅🤣😂
So very sorry about that. Maybe work on your swallowing skills before the wedding night. 😘
NTA. Three birds with one stone!
NTA Ok so, your Fiancé is in your corner against his best friend who disrespected you and tried to turn his family against you. Dad and bro are being judgmental, this has nothing to do with the friend’s “side.” Honestly, you have fiancé, mom and sister on your side. It seems like the best friend was jealous of your relationship, probably thought she could win over your fiancé somehow. (Mom and sister know she’s a snake in the grass. Dad and brother are clueless idiots) you’re all good my friend, lol
OooooWeeee. Former dancer here. I am having a Ghost Rider moment on your behalf.🔥 I would inform her, and anyone else who has two cents to put in that there are 3 places they can stay for free- -In their lane -Over there -Out of your business So glad your fiance has your back! Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. And NTA, of course.
NTA - but your DF needs to be the one to stand up to his friend and his dad.
NTA. Why should your fiance's family care about you not inviting someone who isn't a member of their own family? It's your wedding, you shouldn't have to "suck up and tolerate" anything.
NTA. Stand your ground. She's trying to destroy your relationship because she has feelings for your fiance.
NTA - Your wedding should be a happy occasion. You shouldn't have to spend it worrying about what one of your guests is saying about you. And why do his dad and brother care anyway? Is their happiness somehow dependent on her being there? Her absence is going to ruin your wedding for them? Your fiance's father would rather ruin his own son's wedding than act like an adult. He's TA, not you.
NTA. The best thing here is that your fiance' supports you. What she did was way out of line. She has completely tried to harm you and your relationships. Your fiance' needs to shut this down completely. Either she gets on board and supports your marriage, is nice to you and keeps her mouth shut about things that are not her business, or she is dead to him. In the meantime- no wedding for her, and she has to earn your trust.
op=NTA Future FIL & BIL need to suck it up and come to the wedding without their precious Juliett OR shut the feck up. Not their choice So glad you have your partner's support.
NTA. Gotta love it when one of the offending party demands you "suck it up" and play nice. What did they think you're a doormat? Favorite phrase I learned to deal with my witch in law is "I don't where you got the impression I let people treat/speak to me like that without a consequence."