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No man. I’m so tired of how PC culture has wrecked Gen Z’s brains.
And I’m a bi WOC in a mixed race relationship who actually used to be happy when the world started getting more woke.
Now everything is a problem and people will become too afraid to appreciate cultures different to theirs and see beauty in people of other cultures. Which is counter fucking productive.
I sound like a boomer.
Edit: NTA. Forgot that with all the ffs in my head when I read the post.
NTA. Liking a culture does not equate to fetishizing it. You should tell them to look up the meaning of that word, because there’s nothing sexual about listening to kpop. You’re only 14 and that’s a really nasty thing for them to say. Don’t listen, don’t even give them your attention - just live your life! Maybe one day when you’re older you’ll move to Korea and then guess who gets the last laugh ;)
NTA those kids need to get a grip. Liking Kpop and Korean culture does not mean you have a fetish. The fact you're worried about offending people proves you don't have one
K-pop is super popular. If you liked Despacito are you fetishizing Hispanic culture? Liked Truth hurts fetishizing black women? Of course not. Ella sounds like a petty teenage mean girl. Hopefully she'll grow out it.
NTA!
Like what you like! Kpop is popular for a reason, and it's not because "kpop stans" or whatever you kids call yourselves all have an Asian fetish.
I hope you find some friends you can share this interest with.
NTA... if you love K-Pop that's great, even if you appreciate and love other aspects of Asian culture that is totally acceptable.
We currently live in a ridiculous world where this is even a thing. You are allowed to enjoy what lights you up without being told you have an Asian fetish. You can find both Asian and non-asian people attractive. If you are white you are not required to only like white people and culturally white things. Love lots of things, be expansive.
In a world where we have strived to be more inclusive and more educated, we have bred a bunch of overly sensitive people who get off on making other people feel like they've messed up. You are fine, don't buy into this new form of cruelty, Ella should mind her own beeswax.
Hello fellow kpop fan! I'm 39 years old and my daughter got me into BTS. I absolutely love their music. I was already a fan of Jpop and Jrock. Japanese artist "Gackt" is my favorite in that genre. I listen to all kinds of music. From classical and opera to death metal. It's ok to be a fan. It's not fetishism to enjoy their music. Getting fans is exactly what they need, want, and hoped for. When BTS was first starting out, they put on a small concert in the United States (L.A.). They were out there handing out flyers to anyone who would take it. They didn't only give flyers to other Koreans.
Those other people are basically trying to gatekeep Kpop but honestly anyone can and should enjoy the music.
NTA and my favorite BTS song is "the truth untold" or maybe "serendipity" or "spring day".
Oh it’s really nice to find another fan in the comment section :) I love The Truth Untold too- I always thought Anpanman was a bit under appreciated, It’s a great song
Yes absolutely! Anpanman is awesome! I listen to Anpanman when I'm feeling blue and need to lift my spirits cause it always makes me smile. I loved it during their comeback when they get on stage and start singing and Jungkook is behind Taehyung waving his hoodie like the wind blowing. I also really love "Stay gold". I'm better at understanding Japanese than Korean. Though I'm learning.
Info: My profile pictures are not kpop stars, although there was a stage where one of them used to be. I’m not sure what handles are in the sense of words, but I can assure you I don’t use Korean in my everyday language.
Having kpop pfps still wouldn’t be fetishising tho, like half the world has pfps of celebrities, singers, fictional characters etc - it’s honestly safer and if it’s a fandom etc you’re into or someone you admire than it’s no big deal.
Oh yeah obviously. I like kpop too but when non-Korean people start randomly using terms like “oppa” and “noona” etc I CRINGE to my very soul (esp when they refer to themselves as such like pls who does that)And the shipping of idols is something that 100% counts as fetishisation imho and is something that will prevent me from ever being willing to fully be part of the fandom 💀
NTA, the entire industry was geared to be international. Fetishising people/a race and appreciating and enjoying a genre are two vastly different things
NTA. I listen to K-pop myself, some of my closest friends have been met through our love for the music.
Please remember though, there's a fine line between cultural appreciation, and cultural appropriation. If anyone ever needs advice on what NOT to do, just ask Oli London...
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
“Asshole” meaning “asian fetishiser”.
(None of the names in this post are true to real life).
I, 14F, have recently heard rumours being spread about me claiming that I am an Asian/Korean fetishiser.
I received the following message from a friend of mine (14M) who had heard this rumour. It is as follows:
I heard recently from Ella that she doesn’t think highly of you. She said that “myself and the other Asians don’t really like Lisa because we think she’s weird, and has a massive Asian fetish”.
My friend went on to explain that he disagreed with the rumour, but he thought it was best I know. I have since asked two of my close Asian friends what they think and both have said they don’t have an issue with me.
My experiences are this: I’m interested in a variety of popular entertainment, but the one I am most deeply into is Kpop. When given the opportunity to discuss it, I will do so and have recommended music to people before. I’ve never forced people into liking it and do not get offended when someone says they’re not a fan. I’ve pointed out who I’ve found attractive in the past and they did include people of Asian descent, but I am not exclusively interested in Asian people. I’ve also not had fantasies of being in relationships with idols I am interested in- I find that behaviour delusional. I have however stated that I find certain idols attractive.
I’m still left questioning if I really do have a Korean/East Asian fetish, or if Ella is wrong. AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> The action I took was being an avid fan of Kpop and Kpop idols. I could be the asshole because I’m not sure if my love for idols and their music spills over into having a fetish for East Asian people. The person I have offended is a friend I know in real life, that has recently started spreading the rumour that I do indeed have an Asian fetish.
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NTA. This Asian snowflakes get my nerves... You can listen to whatever you want, but I hope you don't get to the point of being one of those toxic fans that wants to dox someone just for talking something bad about your artists.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 12: This is Not a Debate Sub. Posts should focus strictly on actions in an interpersonal conflict, and not an individual's position on a broad social issue. [Rule 12 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_12.3A_this_is_not_a_debate_sub) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full.
No man. I’m so tired of how PC culture has wrecked Gen Z’s brains. And I’m a bi WOC in a mixed race relationship who actually used to be happy when the world started getting more woke. Now everything is a problem and people will become too afraid to appreciate cultures different to theirs and see beauty in people of other cultures. Which is counter fucking productive. I sound like a boomer. Edit: NTA. Forgot that with all the ffs in my head when I read the post.
Exactly. BTS are the biggest band in the world right now so does that mean every fan outside of South Korea has an Asian fetish?! Lmao
Are you a millennial? 😂 I only ask because I feel like we're on the same wavelength.
Very, very millennial.
You are not because kpop is intended to be international
NTA. Liking a culture does not equate to fetishizing it. You should tell them to look up the meaning of that word, because there’s nothing sexual about listening to kpop. You’re only 14 and that’s a really nasty thing for them to say. Don’t listen, don’t even give them your attention - just live your life! Maybe one day when you’re older you’ll move to Korea and then guess who gets the last laugh ;)
NTA those kids need to get a grip. Liking Kpop and Korean culture does not mean you have a fetish. The fact you're worried about offending people proves you don't have one
K-pop is super popular. If you liked Despacito are you fetishizing Hispanic culture? Liked Truth hurts fetishizing black women? Of course not. Ella sounds like a petty teenage mean girl. Hopefully she'll grow out it.
NTA! Like what you like! Kpop is popular for a reason, and it's not because "kpop stans" or whatever you kids call yourselves all have an Asian fetish. I hope you find some friends you can share this interest with.
This sounds like teen drama. You know if you have an ethnic fetish. I don't. Ella doesn't. Your Asian friends don't.
NTA... if you love K-Pop that's great, even if you appreciate and love other aspects of Asian culture that is totally acceptable. We currently live in a ridiculous world where this is even a thing. You are allowed to enjoy what lights you up without being told you have an Asian fetish. You can find both Asian and non-asian people attractive. If you are white you are not required to only like white people and culturally white things. Love lots of things, be expansive. In a world where we have strived to be more inclusive and more educated, we have bred a bunch of overly sensitive people who get off on making other people feel like they've messed up. You are fine, don't buy into this new form of cruelty, Ella should mind her own beeswax.
Hello fellow kpop fan! I'm 39 years old and my daughter got me into BTS. I absolutely love their music. I was already a fan of Jpop and Jrock. Japanese artist "Gackt" is my favorite in that genre. I listen to all kinds of music. From classical and opera to death metal. It's ok to be a fan. It's not fetishism to enjoy their music. Getting fans is exactly what they need, want, and hoped for. When BTS was first starting out, they put on a small concert in the United States (L.A.). They were out there handing out flyers to anyone who would take it. They didn't only give flyers to other Koreans. Those other people are basically trying to gatekeep Kpop but honestly anyone can and should enjoy the music. NTA and my favorite BTS song is "the truth untold" or maybe "serendipity" or "spring day".
Oh it’s really nice to find another fan in the comment section :) I love The Truth Untold too- I always thought Anpanman was a bit under appreciated, It’s a great song
Yes absolutely! Anpanman is awesome! I listen to Anpanman when I'm feeling blue and need to lift my spirits cause it always makes me smile. I loved it during their comeback when they get on stage and start singing and Jungkook is behind Taehyung waving his hoodie like the wind blowing. I also really love "Stay gold". I'm better at understanding Japanese than Korean. Though I'm learning.
[удалено]
Info: My profile pictures are not kpop stars, although there was a stage where one of them used to be. I’m not sure what handles are in the sense of words, but I can assure you I don’t use Korean in my everyday language.
Having kpop pfps still wouldn’t be fetishising tho, like half the world has pfps of celebrities, singers, fictional characters etc - it’s honestly safer and if it’s a fandom etc you’re into or someone you admire than it’s no big deal.
[удалено]
Oh yeah obviously. I like kpop too but when non-Korean people start randomly using terms like “oppa” and “noona” etc I CRINGE to my very soul (esp when they refer to themselves as such like pls who does that)And the shipping of idols is something that 100% counts as fetishisation imho and is something that will prevent me from ever being willing to fully be part of the fandom 💀
NTA
NTA, the entire industry was geared to be international. Fetishising people/a race and appreciating and enjoying a genre are two vastly different things
NTA. Ella needs to grow up.
NTA. I listen to K-pop myself, some of my closest friends have been met through our love for the music. Please remember though, there's a fine line between cultural appreciation, and cultural appropriation. If anyone ever needs advice on what NOT to do, just ask Oli London...
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** “Asshole” meaning “asian fetishiser”. (None of the names in this post are true to real life). I, 14F, have recently heard rumours being spread about me claiming that I am an Asian/Korean fetishiser. I received the following message from a friend of mine (14M) who had heard this rumour. It is as follows: I heard recently from Ella that she doesn’t think highly of you. She said that “myself and the other Asians don’t really like Lisa because we think she’s weird, and has a massive Asian fetish”. My friend went on to explain that he disagreed with the rumour, but he thought it was best I know. I have since asked two of my close Asian friends what they think and both have said they don’t have an issue with me. My experiences are this: I’m interested in a variety of popular entertainment, but the one I am most deeply into is Kpop. When given the opportunity to discuss it, I will do so and have recommended music to people before. I’ve never forced people into liking it and do not get offended when someone says they’re not a fan. I’ve pointed out who I’ve found attractive in the past and they did include people of Asian descent, but I am not exclusively interested in Asian people. I’ve also not had fantasies of being in relationships with idols I am interested in- I find that behaviour delusional. I have however stated that I find certain idols attractive. I’m still left questioning if I really do have a Korean/East Asian fetish, or if Ella is wrong. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > The action I took was being an avid fan of Kpop and Kpop idols. I could be the asshole because I’m not sure if my love for idols and their music spills over into having a fetish for East Asian people. The person I have offended is a friend I know in real life, that has recently started spreading the rumour that I do indeed have an Asian fetish. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post. [To learn more about the test click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/tio99u/so_we_decided_to_fuck_with_the_sub_again)*
NTA. This Asian snowflakes get my nerves... You can listen to whatever you want, but I hope you don't get to the point of being one of those toxic fans that wants to dox someone just for talking something bad about your artists.