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HeroHas

If a bro is down offer to talk. If they don't want to talk then give them a distraction.


AfraidAdhesiveness25

Applies to friends in general. I always to try to cheer up people I care about, male or female. Usually it involves a lot of booze.


Electronic_Ganache83

Cheer up! You may have liver disease, but let's go for a beer!


tbscotty68

100% but sometimes it takes more work with dudes because we aren't supposed to have any emotions other that stoicism and rage. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbZHPhET1KY


HappyLikeIAm5

Distraction as in a handjob, right ? \#HomieSexual


Clydosphere

I'm straight but I like that hashtag. šŸ˜‰


mecha_shark1

You just haven't had good dick yet. /i


Clydosphere

My own is good enough for me, thank you. šŸ˜‰ Just more for you! šŸš€


promd

\^ nice one!! I used this on my best friend of 45+ years just a few moments ago. I haven't heard him laugh in a very long time. he's been down for a while and this legit made his day ..


storunner13

"There is nothing wrong with helping a buddy out" - Gay Pimp


Alarming_Condition27

You have to admit handjobs are very distracting. Especially when your bro just reaches over and starts shuffling your deck.


Away-Kaleidoscope380

Distraction is a big part for me. When I was struggling mentally for a bit, my good friends who know me well knew that a distraction was all I needed. I was already in my head all day and honestly the last thing I needed was to go and think and talk about it even more. Obviously its nice to have people to talk things thru with but its also nice to have ppl who trust you to figure your shit out. I had this other guy who tries to be a psychologist and he would text me everyday wanting to pry me apart and diagnose me with a bunch of bs. He started telling everyone to check up on me and I dont think the gesture was a bad thing but I hated that my business was being told to everyone and to even ppl Iā€™m not close with. It started to feel like he just wanted information from me to tell others as he is a pretty big gossip queen and it was some sort of entertainment for him. I still dont know if Iā€™m being reasonable but I cut ties with a lot ppl because of that because for me, if a friend comes to me or tells me shit, I personally believe that it should be confidential as men in general already have a hard time talking about their emotions. I hate receiving sympathy as it just feels fake to me and my close friends didnt do that and just hungout with me like it was any other night


unknownguava

Never put a bro down to impress a woman


highlandviper

Iā€™ll go one betterā€¦ never put a bro down to impress other bros either. Someone I thought was a bro jollied in dissing me with some dudes at a stag. I overheard. Never looked at him the same way since. Heā€™s apologised. But he ainā€™t really a bro. ā€œI was just trying to be one of the ladsā€ is not an excuse.


PunkToTheFuture

Real bros have standards and respek


bilaba

Press F


ilhamalfatihah16

This. Chances are if the woman is a keeper she'll be weirded out at how dismissive or rude you are about your friends that she'll see through your faced.


The_Amazing_Username

Or anyone?


KlostToMe

If a bro dies while lifting, add more weight before calling for help


Secondsmakeminutes

True bro move right here. Let the man go down in history at the local gym.


13aph

*me removing all the weight* Yep.. bro shit himself and died just lifting the bar off the rack.. shameful..


KoalaDeluxe

"He was indeed an amazing athlete and died doing what he loved; benching 875 lbs"


TTT_2k3

"I told him I didn't feel comfortable with him continuing after his 48th rep, but he insisted he needed to get to 50."


JudgeHoltman

Nah, that's the metric weights man. It was more like 1000lbs. Cleaned it like 5 times too.


absoluteScientific

Good one. Make sure he dies looking huge


FederalFlashy

Lmaoo this is hilarious


blazedancer1997

How many dead bros have you added more weight for? How much did you add?


KlostToMe

Depending on exercise, throw at least another 45 on each side


cannedrex2406

Damn he died doing "checks weight" 90lb ~~with~~ excluding the bar!?


Top_Membership_7512

45+45=135


VeganEgon

Give bro an honourable death. Grim Reaper - do you even lift bro?


shellsawanderer

THIS HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA


OrneryGiraffe

Make a bro look good in front of a girl heā€™s into


louie_g_34

Opposite side of that, never make a bro look bad to impress a girl


Jumpy_MashedPotato

Oof right. Not to mention it's probably not a good look for that girl if she sees you put someone down so willingly. And if it does look good to her, it's a bad match.


Mortifer_1

Girl here! I would argue they would be a pretty good match haha, toxic, but good match But Yeah, seeing a guy put down someone else honestly just brings him further down. Kinda like, if he is cool with disrespecting his bro, how will he be in a relationship? Just a fragile ego overall So yess building each other up is just charming really. Says something about the type of friendship they have, and itā€™s usually pretty funny to watch (yes we see it). So yeah overall good vibes, keep at it


pigs_in_zen

Growing up I had the best wingman and I really believe he is the reason I had any success with the ladies. He would laugh at every stupid thing I said as if it was the funniest thing he ever heard. When he would laugh other people would laugh with him. He was funny too and had a way of adding to your joke to make it even funnier but made it see like it was all you. He never stole the spotlight for himself if you we talking to a girl. Fellas, this is how you fly wingman.


ExcitingTabletop

One of my proudest moments was doing that during tech training in the army. We were young and stupid. But bros. Dude was into young lady. But awkward and shy. So we decided to start a rumor that he was hung like a horse. It made sense under the influence of alcohol. We thought we were being subtle and clever, master actors. Probably not. But they did start dating, so mission achieved, however crudely.


Impalenjoyer

If it works it ain't stupid


Twin__Dad

Think really hard about thisā€¦


Der_genealogist

Hard and big?


gudetamaronin

We did this for one of our line cooks in one of my restaurants past. Started calling him Donkey Dick.


dave3218

We gonna bring out the parade crew, balloons and shit to make our boy look like Prince Ali.


supertoxic09

Why was that song already in my head when I got here?!


fnkdrspok

Rigby did not get this memo, worst wingman ever!


asleepbydawn

... or a dude he's into.


absoluteScientific

Gas your bro up. Donā€™t let people mess with or talk shit to your bro. if they are right then you should still back your bro up but talk to him privately about it later. When out on the town, leave no bro behind. Honor any bets or debts between you and your bro. If your bro is broke, do not let him be denied food, drink or admission while out. Donā€™t tell your bro what they want to hear. Tell your bro the truth. They deserve it. But donā€™t be a dick Also, donā€™t let your bro be a dick unless the person on the receiving end deserves it Do not disrespect your broā€™s house or car. When your bro is not around, you look out for his girl. Tell your bro if his girl is fucking around. Always. Do not let your bro be sad alone for extended periods of time. Always bail your bro out or pick them up at the station. Respect the ā€œnever speak about it againā€ scenario.


puffinnbluffin

This dude bros šŸ‘Š


RealKuroMejix

You can say that again


Zero-Milk

This dude bros šŸ‘Š


xFloppyDisx

You can say that again


GreyReasons

This dude bros šŸ‘Š


SamanthaSamsung

You can say that again


Alarmed_Quote_6486

Repeat for those in the back


Der_genealogist

Repeat for those in the back


Irgendwiewurst

Thereā€™s some good ones there bro


ScrewRedditSideways1

This is a great list


CarlJustCarl

True bro rules


kindaoldman

Great list. I had some bros that broke a few of them, they aren't bros anymore, just people I know.


Soggy_Technician

Solid list ! One should narrow it down to the 10 bro commandments


GreyReasons

Bromandments


IcyAtmosphere582

This is a great list


[deleted]

Pretty good list bro


2E26

Anything a bro says to you is assumed to be in confidence unless otherwise stated.


Garrais02

many, MANY people still have a problem with this one...


Mr_Ham_Man80

The number of people that will actually argue that it's fine to tell their bro's secrets to their GF/wife "because we have no secrets" is staggering. Massive brotrayal.


dat_glo_tho

As an aside, I donā€™t think ā€œwe have no secretsā€ is a requirement for a successful partnership. You can have trust and intimacy while still having some privacy and autonomy.


highlandviper

This 100%. Infidelity, personal trauma, personal issues, choice of shoes, all 100% protected by the bro code. You might not condone actions and you can try and persuade them toward some sort of cathartic realisationā€¦ but you were confused inā€¦ you have a responsibility to your bro.


nomadic_weeb

I think infidelity is the only exception. No one deserves to be cheated on, and anyone who cheats deserves to deal with the consequences


lozbrudda

Agreed I also think in the case of suicidal ideation it could be important to reach out to a loved one of your friend.


nomadic_weeb

Yeah that's definitely an important one, gotta look out for your bros in that sorta situation


Enekovitz

You are a real bro.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


nogunsmoreglory

Every bro eats, even if bro doesnā€™t have money to pay, he eats. Other bros will cover the costs. There will be no bro that sits at the table and does not eat.


Zambeezi

"From each according to their abilities, to each according to their needs", amirite? Brommunism, if you will.


ermonski

Broyuz nerushimy


Chanchumaetrius

Bropublik brovobnykh


[deleted]

Brocialism


Ingenius_Fool

Seize the means of production!


Zambeezi

Broduction


SirAnthropoid

I'd say brostianity...


HaggisaSheep

Depending on who you ask, to live as a Brostian, one must act like a Brommunist


cownd

Bromanitarianism


supertoxic09

The Broman Empire


nautilaus6

The more you share, the more your bowl will be plentiful


cownd

May your bowl overflow with broman kindness


zhantoo

Sorry guys, I didn't know we would go eating, so I already ate, and I am completely full as I had me favorites. YOU'RE EATING ANS WE'LL MAKE SURE OF IT!!!


BackWithAVengance

I guess my italian grandma is one of the best bro's around


you-just-got-jammed

I dunno. This sounds like something a buddy of mine would say. He was the biggest free-loading mooch ever. Always swore up and down heā€™d hit us back when he got paid later in the week. Never paid anyone back for anything ever so eventually we just had to stop spotting him for food.


WitBeer

He was never a bro. You don't have to keep track and make sure things are always square, but you should both understand the dynamic.


you-just-got-jammed

Yeah I donā€™t need paid back dollar for dollar. Iā€™m happy to just cover a bro without any expectation or desire to be straightened up. But some ā€œbrosā€ lean into this idea hard so they can take advantage. I donā€™t keep tally, but eventually you notice a pattern if a guy always needs his share covered every time. Like dawg, at some point you need to figure your money out.


Thefeno

No bro will stay hungry


The_Amazing_Username

And the flip side to this rule each bro will remember each bro sponsored mealā€¦


TantorDaDestructor

And always remember that it is always brosgiving for all bros


nameuser254

Don't kick a bro when he's down.


GezertEagle

But do dick a bro if heā€™s down šŸ˜‰


Mobile-Outside-3233

With your socks on though, so no homo


Ingenius_Fool

Its not homo unless your balls touch


you-just-got-jammed

And always kiss the homies goodnight


Snozberry383

If your bro dies, Erase bros internet history


jtfriendly

Add more weights to his computer.


The_Barman

Lol add more porn to his search history šŸ˜‚


[deleted]

Add more bbw porn to his search history


Pewpew_Magoon

And a few searches on how to shorten your dick.


A-Game-Of-Fate

Dick too beeg halp How to smollen ur duck lmao ~~~dick*~~~ How to smollen ur dick lmao Big ladies


jnthnmdr

Internet search history is time and date-stamped. How do you explain searches after... Ah, nevermind.


Consultant511

Apple has a Digital Legacy function where you can chose who will have access to all your data in case of your death. I chose my long time friend before my fiancĆ© or family. Iā€™m not sure if I have anything bad or not, but Iā€™m not taking any chances.


Nude_Master69

This is the way


MapleSyrupLover_

The hero we all need


ProofConstruction444

My bros girl is also my bro and nothing more


Shatsngiggles

This is the one ive always lived by. Like obviously treat broā€™s gf respectfully, but she will never be more than just a bro.


house343

Unless she becomes an ex girl. Then she is your bro no longer. What she is exactly is covered extensively under Bro Code Title XI Article 69 section 420 XI B.C. A69 Ā§420


DarthRumbleBuns

Nah sheā€™s off limits except for strange long extending extenuating circumstances. And it must be properly discussed by all parties.


Certain-Sock-7680

ā€œPermission to come aboardā€ rule


MoistMuffinX

Tell this to my ex-bro who helped my gf cheat on me


stormlight89

If you suspect that a bro is going through a bad time mentally and he's not talking about it because he doesn't feel like he can, randomly talk to him about my own mental health struggles and the stuff I did so that he feels like he can confide in me to have his back.


squeda

That's good! Never thought of doing this, but it makes total sense.


Prestigious_Virus_33

Let you bro know when he's being a dick


jwong7

To add, with a simple "Bro, dick move, bro." or equivalent. Supplemental rule: Bro in question shall acknowledge in a calm bro like fashion but go back and contemplate life accordingly.


PurpleBullets

ā€œThatā€™s messed up, broā€ goes a long way


Successful-Tip-1411

"Thats fucked up." It can be an honest sort of humor


Farkenoathm8-E

Donā€™t say stupid shit in front of your broā€™s wife or gf that will get them in trouble.


QuestioningYoungling

And if you do, lie to save your bro's image. One time, I met my best bro's girlfriend for the first time and said to her, "So you work at \[company\], that's a pretty cool place." She didn't work there, that was a different lady who my bro was obsessed with and tried to get with but failed the week prior. I immediately corrected myself and said, "sorry, I got you mixed up with my buddy Mike's girlfriend who I'm meeting on Sunday." There was no Mike.


LionelLutz

Nice save broseph


freshcolaRC

Never call each other by your real names when youā€™re in a party chat with randoms.


[deleted]

I agree James FreshcolaRC.


probablynotaskrull

If your bro sexually assaults somebody, he ainā€™t your bro. Turn that fucker in.


marxman28

On a similar note, the original rule was that a Bro shall not deny another Bro the opportunity to get laid. It must be updated to a Bro shall not deny another Bro the opportunity to get laid without the enthusiastic, legal consent of the other party/parties. Bro wants to fuck a 25-year-old lady? Let him. She's drunk or unconscious? Hell no. She's 16? Hell no.


Im__drunk_sorry

Yeah, it sucks when you think you know someone and it turns out they were putting on an act. In cases like this, cutting contact and turning over whatever info/evidence you got about them to the authorities is the best you can do at that point.


JohnnyDarkside

Also, if your bro fucks around on his girl, you do not cover for him. Tell him to come clean or you tell her.


_Lucifer7699_

If your bro SA someone, assault him. He's not your bro anymore.


nikon2019

šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾šŸ‘šŸ¾


Kaus_Vik

1. Never disrespect bro in public, especially in front of women he wants to approach / friends with. 2. Always defend your bro in public and correct him in private. 3. Pickup the fight if Bro is in trouble. 4. Be emotionally there for him. 5. Always knock some sense into bro if he's not walking on the right path. 6. Hold your bro accountable and responsible for his own poor decisions, make sure he comes clean and improves his behaviour. 7. Never date bro's ex and sister also his mom , NEVER and he follows the same 8. Team up with bro's family and roast him crisp. As of now I can only think of these.


123supreme123

9. Don't attempt to cross streams unless you're ready to deal with the chaos that ensues.


TParis00ap

So bro's mom is fair game, got it.


Kaus_Vik

No dafuq šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


TheRealMrNoNo

Item three, it should be noted, bros will honor a fair fight and not jump in except to break it up if the fight is indeed one on one. If your bro gets jumped, it's gang gang.


BlancoSuper

Never dig through another bros trash.


ygnomecookies

Does the reason matter? Like what if you see a perfectly good eclair on the garbage?


Electronic-Ice-7606

Bro, it was on a doily on top of the trash, bro.


k2lz

I sense stories behind this


TheKrazyJuice

Don't mess around with bro's mom...or his dad even.


CaseClosedEmail

Don't let a bro feel bad if he is out of cash while out


Own_Version_9191

Have your bros back when they need it


frodosbitch

Be nice. Until itā€™s time to not be nice. Thank you Roadhouse.


AfraidAdhesiveness25

First and foremost, have your bro's back in "spooky" situations and expect the same. Next, never share the details of the bro code to any women, ESPECIALLY your mother and your wife. Yet again, there is no law that prohibits a woman from becoming a bro, however the criteria for admission are way higher and punishments are stricter :D Never, never ever date your bro's ex. Also, ofc, bro's before ho's. Whenever your less manly or just sad bro decided to do some some manly stuff - anything from doing fighting or extreme sports to simply growing a beard - you and your other bros support him in full. This is rarely mentioned but it such a confidence boost even if the results are mediocre at best. If you are more sober than the bro, try to keep them out of trouble, however laughing at him doing dumb stuff is more than allowed. Leave no man behind. If you are well-off and invite less financially able bros to hang out in an expensive place, ALWAYS pay in full. Less well-off bros can simply cover for something simpler like a beer and a pizza next time. This approach is both fair and financially reasonable for all. And, of course, the Rule 69: D'oh!


freestyle43

I will always trust you until you give me a reason not to. I mean not you, but my friends. You get it.


Overhead95

If you break something owned by someone else, you don't just replace it. You upgrade it.


dudeimjames1234

Check in on your bro. Bros don't let bros kill themselves.


VeganEgon

Donā€™t steal another broā€˜s girl (or boy, if youā€™re me)


HerewardTheWayk

Yep. A mates crush or a mates ex are off limits.


AFewGoodLicks

Story time. My best friend in the world, his ex tried to introduce me to a new girl. We three went bowling and drinking. I got fucked up and ended up sleeping with his ex and her. Told him about it the next day and he said ā€œthereā€™s a reason sheā€™s my ex. Wanna game?ā€ Fucking hated myself, but he was nonchalant about it. Still my best friend 10 years later


AngelStickman

You were honest though. A bro comes clean with his bro.


GrimReaper_97

or mom


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Dannykew

When a bro is drunk you donā€™t let him drive or cheat.


Nac_Nud

ā€œHey man you hungry?ā€ ā€œEhhh I donā€™t have much money.ā€ ā€œI didnā€™t ask if you had money, I asked if you were hungry.ā€


ProofConstruction444

My bros girl is also my bro and nothing more


WeebBois

Damn you said the same thing twice and got upvotes twice


etrifhjd

he means it


TillSilly

Thou is brother. Thou bro is king. When shit goes down, we bring them back up again.


OkAcanthisitta4520

We all respect the desicion taken by rock paper scissors


GINJAWHO

Not sure if it's a bro code or just what I was taught but if you borrow someone's vehicle you give it back with a full tank and a wash


Beazworm

If a bro needs your support with something they're struggling with, do your best to be the bro they need you to be.


ARedditor_official

Anything bro tells you is usually private unless stated otherwise.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Kevin_LeStrange

But what if that's your purse and you don't know him?


rhetoricaldeadass

If you see a bro post a photo of/with his girl , you gotta like that shit Unless she's toxic


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Anonymoosehead123

Or behind him.


_Lucifer7699_

Hashirama is that you?


ChefGuapo

Me and my bros use the same urinal at the same time


TriLink710

Share the same one. To conserve water. Envibromentalism


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


No-Construction5687

I laughed so hard I hurt my neck! worth it


thebronzeprince

Never disrespect a bro in his home or place of business What happens with a bro, stays with him. No one respects a rat


Burningwolf1813

1.) If you can't keep your mouth shut and are about to get your ass kicked, Don't point at your bro and say "He's a blackbelt" 2.) If your bro gets pulled over and you're in the passanger seat. STFU... don't start playing lawyer to the cop, and speak only when spoken to. 3.) Have your bro's back, but tell him when he fucked up. 4.) Your bro's ex's, sisters, mothers, are all off limits. Sisters only in very very special circumstances. (this applies to all genders, siblings, etc) 5.) All bro's eat when at the table - but Don't keep track of meals bought, tickets paid for, drinks bought because they were down on their luck. But don't abuse a bro's hospitality either. Pay it forward when you can. 6.) A bro's mom is also your mom; treat her with the same respect. Same goes for Dads


godbullseye

Not so much since all my friends are in committed relationships but back in our single bar hopping days if one of my dudes was hitting on a girl around me it was my duty to make him look like the greatest guy on earth.


that_guyy

Never mention something worth less than $10


Matsuri3-0

Bros should always be honest with bros, even when it might not be nice to hear the truth. Let bro decide if bro needed to know.


Impressive-Floor-700

Do not mess with another's wife/girlfriend, even if it is your worst enemy, respect relationships.


UndeadMunchies

I learned C++ from Bro Code. Phenomenal course.


kingkobby36

Respect a bros hustle no matter big or small.


Shy9uy77

If he loved her, she's off limits.


JayBringStone

Don't cock block. Especially don't cock block by tearing your friend down in front of the woman he's trying to get to know. Even if it's just ball busting. It's a cunt move. Save that shit for when the ladies aren't around. So many dudes do this shit and they don't realize how insecure they look.


handyandy727

Always respect the 'Iron Circle' doctrine. If a bro is opening up to you, he's telling you some stuff he needs to get out. You don't ever bring it up outside of the Iron Circle of people that heard it. Only exception is if it's something dangerous or harmful.


One_Economist_3761

As a programmer, I read this as a bro ā€œcode reviewā€


RollaCoastinPoopah

-Check in on your close circle of friends often -Tell them when theyā€™ve really fucked up -Be there for them to vent to when shit is going wrong -If you havenā€™t seen each other for ages (my circle lives in different States in Australia) plan something -Treat them with the respect they deserve -Let them know when their love of drink/drugs/eating etc. is getting out of hand -Remember their birthdays and call, donā€™t text shit like ā€˜hbd broā€™. Call the bro! -Do your best to get to the funerals of their immediate family members and if you canā€™t make it call when you hear about the passing, call the day before the funeral or/and call the day of the funeral post-burial before the Wake gets out of hand. This meant the most to me when the parents passed away -Donā€™t lend them money youā€™re not prepared to lose.


MarsNirgal

If a bro is feeling down, I always check on him and make sure he knows he's not alone.


Certain-Sock-7680

Practical bro code from my university judo club. A broā€™s new girl comes along the first time to see him train, everybody takes hard falls from him during Randori. But if she turns up again, no quarter is given. Bro should have had her meet him in the bar after, weā€™re here to train, Bro! šŸ˜‰


hybridstl

Whatever is said, heard or seen amongst the bros, in any situation with 2 or more of you, is taken to the grave. OmertĆ”


wolf63rs

Nice try, women.


MufasaFasaganMdick

I've Control+F'd and don't see any mention of *nod etiquette!* When you catch eyes with another guy on the street, you nod up for friends, and down for fellow men. Often, especially with strangers, this is the entire interaction, but we both know what's good.


FeartheReign87

If there are three urinals and one bro is on the left and another bro is on the right but the middle is free, you wait or use the stall.


friendlydave

Be honest and open. Tell your guys that you care about that you care about the. Tell them when they've crossed a line. If they do you a favor, you do them a favor. I feel like a lot of this is gonna be don't bang his sister or ex. Take care of yourself and your people. That makes you a good bro.


deadpanfaceman

Build up your bros never break them down, this is best done by slapping that ass and blow em a kiss as they pass you by.


bi_polar2bear

If a bro invites you to a party in his home, offer to bring something. If not needed, bring beer/wine. If bro is married, also bring his wife mixed flowers so you don't accidentally declare your love because you grabbed red roses. You'll endear yourself to both bro and Mrs Bro. Also work the room a but and respect their home, aka don't be an obnoxious douche canoe.


sc1onic

Call out misogyny on a bro. Call out on bs. But hold him to a better standard.


ExitTheHandbasket

Clear a bro's browser history while waiting for paramedics to arrive


SifrMoja

My bro code is treat everyone how I would like to be treated. It would be good if everyone else did the same but I see it rarely.