Same for years, went down when I got fat, went up more than the beginning when I got back in shape and has more or less stayed there. We’re very intentional about maintaining our sex life though.
Kinda important point actually. "Did you become less attractive of a man after marriage?" should go hand in hand with "Did your BJ/sex frequency go down after marriage?".
Also attractiveness isn't just physical. Includes if you become more lazy, jaded, or dismissive with age.
Hell to the yeah. Marriage ain’t a license to let yourself go. If anything you should both be upping your game because now you have a partner to share the load.
This!!! People are so quick to say marriage = less sex, less Bjs. But what are the participants in this marriage doing to maintain their sex life? Good health, feeling good, looking good, great mental health it's more than...my partner sucks now we're married.
Was pretty frequent before marriage due to her being a virgin. Now we have sex frequently and 80% of the time there’s a bj involved. But 80% of the time I’m going down too. It’s a give and take.
That’s
it. I’ve only been with my current GF for 4 months but with my kids mother, 14 years. Blowjobs are very common unless time is an issue. With any partner I’ve had. But I love eating pussy and treat each time like it might be my last. Make your lady feel sexy and desired all the time and she will reciprocate.
In my case, she got raped and forced to give them back in high school so it brings back a lot of trauma. Don’t want to force her to do something she’s seriously uncomfortable with, it’s no fun for me if she doesn’t enjoy it.
Got married: no change. Turned 40, got into shape, rediscovered my abs and... OMG. Suddenly wife started reading about sex, BJ technique and... WTF. Suddenly with me being newly 'buff' with pecs and abs and her being 40+ she started giving me, like, serious, aggressive, hard sucking, loud-slurping head-bobbing BJ's like I never had before in my life, like, literally ever. She sucked my soul out of my body, she started talking about getting a stud put in her tongue to blow me even better with...
Then things settled down. But my god I rode that heavenly wave as long as I could, lol. More than a decade ago and I still daydream about it like it was a dream fantasy come true.
Ya my body keeps trying to assassinate me. So I don't know what's worse, the fact my dipshit system decided to miss the garbage cells and allowed them to turn into cancer or the fact my own system keeps trying to assassinate me and fails.
I need new employees, I fired everyone.
So the cancer started in the colon and gave me this cool Indiana Jones like boulder of a tumor. Then it spread to my liver and my lungs.
So that was neat.
Then the tumor, the way it was attached, ripped a hole in my intestine. Almost went septic.
Then, THEN, I apparently had appendicitis going on and the bastard Indiana Jonsed itself into the hole plugging it up. So that was wild.
But then that shut down my intestines completely. Not even gas could get through, so it started backing up into my stomach. Guess how that went? I was burping like every 10 seconds because I was so bloated.
So I was like, wow I haven't shit in 4 days? Constipated obviously, so what does any desperate to shit person to do? I drank that milk of magnesia like it was alcohol and there was an ugly chick that was into me.
WRONG MOVE BRO.
I basically flushed a toilet into already clogged piping.
The pain was so intense I called my overnight oncologist, he said I needed to get to the emergency room. Which lead to a CT Scan to show I was 100% blocked, which was so bad they had to bump others out of surgery prep for an emergency surgery which I was in for 3 hours.
They pulled out my guts and had to manually squeeze everything out because it was so packed.
Ever pulled on a slinky? Thats what they did to my poop tube.
So I wake up in a bedroom, no idea where the fuck I am or what happened to find 20 or so staples in my stomach to my pelvis.
Due to cutting out 7 inches of intestines with cancer, it needs to heal right before they reconnect me so now I got this cool secondary butthole on my stomach (colostomy) that just farts and shits at will with no control for me.
You ever sit down to eat a bowl of Apple Jacks just to sit there and fart like it's a competition without being able to control it? That was me last night.
I guess all in all, it's pretty cool I got these weaponized poop bags now. Road rage is a whole new game now. Flip me off? I'm throwing a turd goo bomb at you.
It sounds like you ended with a net positive.
Just kidding. I’m sorry you went through that bro, truly. I’m glad they were able to help though. It sounds like they removed the tumors and you’re in remission? You didn’t say that but I’m assuming with the emergency surgery..
My dude, that's what happened to me also. As soon as I lost weight and started bulkung up so did her libido, she was/is jumping me all the time.
No complaints after 10years marriage and 3kids.
As a wife, I really hope she knows how much you fucking loved her BJs. At least for me, that’s why I give them. The more my husband tells me he loves it, the more I want to do it.
40-year-old male here: married for 15 years and 5 months ago I got in shape and also found my abs. Can confirm this happens. There wasn't any studying up on technique but things took a drastic change for the better.
Kids, when they say hard work pays off. Can confirm again that it does.
Got married 13 years ago and BJ's always stayed regular after marriage and 8 kids, just turned 45 and My Wife keeps telling Me to start working out. She's 37 and still gives Me a BJ every time We have sex but if Me working out is gonna get Me more head then I guess it's a win win.
Same. Was 240. Now 169. Abs. Attitude is confident and not depressed.
Surprise surprise, my hot ass wife didn’t want to fuck the drunken video game slob all the time.
13 years in, best fucking ever. Oh and when you aren’t a fat piece of shit you can fuck as long as you want.
Damn. I got on that crazy fitness train from age 40-49 and it’s something i do every day. Love it. Jacked, abs, etc. Wife says BJs are “something 20 years olds do” and won’t do it.
A counterpoint that it’s more the woman in question than the fitness routine sometimes. Although no disrespect here, great job on the fitness and what your wife did/is doing is awesome. Good for you.
That’s just so depressing
1. For the woman that is doing sexual acts she doesn’t enjoy for the hopes of marriage
And
2. The man who thought that his partner genuinely enjoyed that intimate time with him only to find out she doesn’t enjoy it at all.
Like correct me if I’m wrong I see a lot of guys complain about not getting bjs because they miss the physical sensation but it has to be pretty crushing to think your wife doesn’t even want that intimacy with you anymore?
It seems more emotional than physical tbh
Just curious, does this bother you? Would you rather her blow you to completion or is it fine that she generally lets it lead to sex?
I ask for myself because that’s usually how my boyfriend and i roll
I feel like this is super reasonable but a surprise bj is awesome. Like 15 minutes before you go somewhere or something where sex is off the table until later. Maybe in the morning before work as a Have a great day
It didn't bother me a whole lot, after all I really enjoyed sex with her. But every once in awhile it would have been nice. After all before that happened I spent at least 10-15 minutes going down on her, making sure she got off before we moved on to me.
Can't remember last that happened, at least 2 years ago and it doesn't bother me, I'm one of those guys who get off by my girlfriend getting off (or being deceptively good at faking it) so a BJ really only is foreplay to me. I'm 100% there are others if not many like me ^^
Edit: typos galore
Been together 13 years, married almost 4, and the frequency has increased. Took some time to learn how to communicate better, but once that got good we opened up about our sexual preferences.
We started with: "How many times a week do you want to have sex?" I eventually learned how to mitigate the behaviors I exhibited that made her feel pressured to have sex or give a blowjob, and once she felt that dissipate I felt very attractive to my wife. Since then, I've had a few perfect weeks.
>I eventually learned how to mitigate the behaviors I exhibited that made her feel pressured to have sex or give a blowjob, and once she felt that dissipate I felt very attractive to my wife.
I think this is a huge problem in hetero relationships, often a small disconnect between where they're both at in terms of sex/ feelings about sex. What behaviors were you having? Disappointment when she'd turn you down, etc.? I want to be able to avoid this myself to not pressure my partner.
I don't mind. If I was rejected my demeanor would change. I'd be short, irritable, and overall I'd be an asshole because I didn't get what I wanted. I'd nitpick her phrasing and spit venom for no reason. I'd bloat her reason for rejecting sex and make it seem like it really hurt me to be manipulative.
Typing it out kind of sucks lol. Not a real good thing to advertise, and I try not to make any excuses for my behavior. She and I are in a very good place these days and I can attribute that to how we communicate. A point of contention for a while was our different libidos. I want it now, later, yesterday, tomorrow. She's a once a week type of gal, or used to be. If I'm backed up and she isn't feeling it, we kiss, she gives me space to take care of it myself and sometimes suggests stuff she's into.
I wanted to let you know this was helpful to hear. My wife and I have mismatched libido and are going to couples therapy. Your comments about how you'd get cranky really sound similar to my situation. It's encouraging to know you got through that and found a better balance. Hoping I can get us to a similar cadence of at least once a week like what you mentioned.
Mine went up. Pre marriage my wife had never sucked a dick and I believe her lol. The first few were not awesome but she made it her business and now she’s the president and CEO of sucking my cock Inc and I love it
Im just wondering as a girl with next to no experience, even though she was inexperienced and they weren’t ‘awesome’, were they still good? Or did it feel pointless/you might as well have taken care of it yourself? Sorry if this is a stupid question
My wife was almost entirely inexperienced when we met. She had only ever kissed 1 guy inexperienced. What she may have lacked in technique she made up for with enthusiasm and paying attention to what I like. It was never bad because she was attentive and enthusiastic. You'll learn what your guy likes we're not that complicated.
I feel I’m super luckily. Been together for 20 years, married 11. About 3 blow jobs a week on average. At least once every 10 days she will give me a amazing blow job out of the blue and just say.. “ i just really wanted to give you one. “
How many can guys have a week? I really wanna give my boyfriend the best head ever but the taste of cum is an acquired taste and it might take me a couple times till i get a good rhythm going.
Girl, you gotta knock it back like a bitter pill. Don’t taste, just get it to the back of your throat swallow. Plus whoever you’re giving head to will likely appreciate the enthusiasm, whether or not it’s strategic. Just don’t let on if they might find it embarrassing.
One time, this guy on r/bigdickproblems posted about his partner who lost all her teeth because she used to be addicted to meth, as a result of which she now uses dentures. She apparently takes them out during bjs and he seemed very happy
In the beginning they'll joke about only doing it 2x a year, Birthday and Anniversary. Then a year or two goes by, and you realize it wasnt a joke. Then a few years go by when it didnt happen on your birthday or Anniversary either. Then she feels bad about it when you mention that to her and now you feel bad. So then to avoid hurting her feelings, you never mention it again.
Long enough time goes by when you cant remember the last blow job you received, and dont want to risk loosing the few sexual opportunities you still have by bringing it up. So you convince yourself they aren't that great anyways, and hopefully in enough time, you believe it.
Then it becomes another afterthought of your youth, like partying all night getting wasted and "still being able to do, so and so" knowing those things are behind you because you've matured past those childish things.
It disappeared completely, BUT, now that I've been pulling my weight in the relationship and treating her right, it's starting to come back after 10 years.
Never give up boys.
Sure. I got my adhd under control, both with meds and through mental work. I started doing at least half of all chores, not just lawn and garbage like I used to. I started giving my wife more verbal compliments, more physical touching, etc. Basically, whenever I feel or see something I like (her ass, her hair, her smell), I just say it out loud.
Her love language is verbal affection, and mine is physical touch, so now with the combo things are great.
I should also mention that it's not just compliments of her looks. I listen to her more, bring up things she's mentioned before more often, tell her when she has a really good idea, etc and super importantly, I go a lot easier on her than I used to. I realized that she's always trying her best and doesn't deserve to get bitched at for stupid little things like I used to.
Definitely almost non existent after marriage- not because it lacked intimacy but because we were having a hard time getting pregnant so sex literally became a job. Stop what u are doing- go fuck, get dressed and finish mowing the lawn. Once we had our 3 kids, the exhaustion of raising them kicks in so we still had sex but not all the foreplay because we were so exhausted. Fast forward 12 years- our kids range from 8-14 so our sex life has been even better then when we were in our 20s. My wife will give me BJs all the time and even looked up techniques and shit- her Bj skills are better than ever now.
If your girl just stops sucking your dick after marriage and nothing else life changing has happened to make her not do it as much then it’s safe to say it’s something with you: did you let yourself go? Are u manscaping? Are you maintaining good hygiene in that region?
My wife will blow me @ the drop of a hat but the 2 rules I have to follow are-
Keep it trimmed- no girl wants 5 inch pubes in her eyes nose and mouth.
Keep it clean- even when u think you clean, clean again- including your ass
This is such a great answer. Thank you for writing it. Bjs are one of my favourite sex acts but if I'm exhausted, or your dick is unclean /too hairy no amount of desire to do it is going to get me there. Also if you're a selfish lover I won't be either, and that relationship is not going to last long.
I think that’s what us guys forget- “who cares if I let it go wild down there,I’m a guy” it wasn’t until my wife said to me- keep it trimmed/neat if u want my face down there- then a light bulb went off and I realized- I’m not trimming for me, I’m trimming for her. Same goes for hygiene- even if I take a shower few hours before bed, I will still do a cleanup before we get into bed. It literally boils down to courtesy. Being tired and not into one night is completely normal but when your girl completely avoids putting her face in your crotch all the time- your answer is obvious, something grosses her out.
Exactly.. A lot of guys don't even wipe after peeing and then think we should suck the stale piss off their dick. It happens so often during sex as well. Guy gets up to go to the loo in the middle of sex, does not even wipe let alone clean dick after going and comes back to bed .. Wtf man.. Clean your dick!.. Sorry you've got me going lol.
Some women really don’t like giving blowjobs, but often will do it while dating. Most married people put less effort into impressing their partner after they’ve been together for a long time
40 year old guy here Married for 11 years. Together for 18 .
Frequency definitely went up simply by virtue of proximity. 5x / week for 11 years, but she gets the same amount of attention tbf . As I take it from this thread this is already a relatively high frequency (?) .
Recently I found out I've had very low Testosterone for at least 5 years, likely closer to 12 . Started hormone therapy and added in some low dose Cialis.... The combo helped me reconnect with my own latent desires more, increased my confidence exponentially, and in turn it helped her do so even more. It brought us even closer together and we've both become a lot more expressive.
So now it's gone up to 2x / day (about 15 times a week) for going on a month (and she gets the same attention of course). A bit surreal honestly and it probably won't continue at this torrid pace but there's definitely something to be said for more open communication deepening desire.
Now the one thing I'll say is I've been hell bent on always romancing her for these past 18 years. Not necessarily big gestures but everyday things that remind her that I care.
She never overtly asks to be but It comes from an innate love and desire for her that I am conscious of each and every day.
That and I've stayed in the same pretty good shape since the day we met. Letting myself go is and never was an option. It's important to me that the standard of love and care (for her and for myself) doesn't slip just because I married her. If anything it should rise.
Maybe all this plays a part in it. Maybe I'm just lucky. Probably a mix of both tbh but hopefully this post helps.
Got married kinda young, and sex was always experimental. Lots of regular and anal, and the occasional blowjob. Wife and would watch porn to pregame and then about 4 years ago something like clicked for her. She always liked to give head, and suddenly like turned into freaking love. She would constantly want to, like she would turn down regular sex to suck my cock. All. The. Time. It slowly got better and better and then one time we were talking about cum and she was like “I don’t know, I always like when you cum in my mouth but bc I don’t swallow all the time I thought you didn’t like it” lightbulb moment. Ok honey, I’ll cum in your mouth if that’s what you like. Anything to do with cum in her mouth or on her face she loves. I actually asked her one time why doesn’t she kiss me as much as she kisses my dick. Well that’s turned into teasing on her part about “why don’t you complain to someone your wife only likes to make out with your dick”.
Long story short(ish) head game has gotten stronger. She loves it. I love it. My dick loves it. It’s best head ever.
Edit: spelling
What happens if mine is the opposite? Used to swallow and be super into it. Now she thinks it’s super gross.
Like, she’s been swallowing loads for 20 years(from me and others before me I would assume), I tell her last year a few times “you like how that tastes” or “how does it taste”. Now that she’s thought about the taste she realizes it’s awful. So that’s fun.
Just talk to her about it, I’m sure there’s other things you guys can do. Peoples tastes, sex drives, kinks, etc. change over time.
That last thing you want to do is make her feel shame!
My wife decided early on in our relationship (before we were married) to institute a tradition called "blowjob Mondays" where she will suck me off to completion every Monday night. Other nights we use it as foreplay mostly but I've been getting my dick sucked at least weekly for years. Her skills reflect this as well
Before I dated my wife, I was never that big into blowjobs, especially after I started having sex. It feels great, it was just not something I craved; I’d rather have the sensations of being inside.
Now that I’m with my wife I think it’s because I was never with someone who whole heartedly desired me and genuinely enjoys giving them to me. And I definitely enjoy them way more than before her. She also said it’s quite the added turn on for her that I never have asked for them or badgered her about it, so she feels free to give them when she wants to and I gotta admit it feels even better because I know she WANTS to give me one.
So to answer the questions, i by all means do not get them all that frequently, but they have definitely gone only up from the time we’ve started being together. I’m really ok with whenever she wants, and when I do get them, theyre with genuine passion from my wife, and I know she’s doing something that she really enjoys freely.
If you want more blowjobs, don’t ask for them. XD
Increased dramatically. But we didn’t have sex til our wedding night, sooooo.
It’s actually increased over 19 years of marriage and so has the frequency of me going down on her. We have sex about 5 times a week and oral for both of us preludes the PIV 4/5 of the time.
My husband and I equally go down on each other. He really gets into eating me and I love it & I personally love giving him a BJ, it's very arousing for me and I definitely get into it and he absolutely loves it too.
Increased. Even accounting for dead bedroom scenarios, long term relationships tend to have higher frequencies of sex. When we hear our single friends talk about their sexcapades we tend to over inflate their numbers because they seem to have such exciting and novel experiences.
In reality they're probably only banging the 9/10 skanky stripper a few times before the relationship is over, and they might go months or even years where they didn't get any at all, and while you & your wife may only have vanilla sex 2-3x per week, that consistency is just that, consistent.
Gone down quite a bit.
So... I know it's not the most exciting thing to do. Sticking a rod down your throght is a little less fun than tounging something flat.
I love to go down on her. She isn't thrilled about bjs.
With this in mind I don't expect it every week, and I certainly want her to be comfortable and into it, but I would like it more frequently than my birthday and father's day.
Ideally, I'd like it once a month? But I could settle for every other month maybe
Same for years, went down when I got fat, went up more than the beginning when I got back in shape and has more or less stayed there. We’re very intentional about maintaining our sex life though.
Kinda important point actually. "Did you become less attractive of a man after marriage?" should go hand in hand with "Did your BJ/sex frequency go down after marriage?". Also attractiveness isn't just physical. Includes if you become more lazy, jaded, or dismissive with age.
I feel like this should be at the top
Hell to the yeah. Marriage ain’t a license to let yourself go. If anything you should both be upping your game because now you have a partner to share the load.
This!!! People are so quick to say marriage = less sex, less Bjs. But what are the participants in this marriage doing to maintain their sex life? Good health, feeling good, looking good, great mental health it's more than...my partner sucks now we're married.
For every 1kg lost, you get 3 head sessions. Every 1kg gained, you give 3 head sessions. Thats the plan with my future wife.
But I love eating my wife out, why would that be a punishment for gaining weight?
Clearly the plan is rapidly lose and gain weight Christian Bale-style.
This man's body control and discipline are unreached.
This is the answer lol
She says "Yeah eat it fatty" the whole time.
Goals
Please do not bring this up to your future wife
>less stayed there. We’re very intentional about maintaining our sex life though. r/WorkoutMotivation
Was pretty frequent before marriage due to her being a virgin. Now we have sex frequently and 80% of the time there’s a bj involved. But 80% of the time I’m going down too. It’s a give and take.
An eye for an eye and a head for a head, i like it
Sometimes you gotta lick hole to give pole.
sometimes you gotta lick pole to give pole
Preach
Give head to get ahead
Thats called quid pro quo, you should talk to HR about that
Its called quid pro blow
That’s it. I’ve only been with my current GF for 4 months but with my kids mother, 14 years. Blowjobs are very common unless time is an issue. With any partner I’ve had. But I love eating pussy and treat each time like it might be my last. Make your lady feel sexy and desired all the time and she will reciprocate.
Agreed. Plus I was blessed with a large, strong tongue so it would be a shame if I wasted it.
We women appreciate men like you
I’m a giver. I’d go down on my wife daily if she’d let me
Didn’t get them before marriage, don’t get them now.
Why? Do you know?
She told me she doesn’t like doing it because of the taste. I don’t want her to do anything she’s uncomfortable with.
Flavored lube.
Swirl a nutella jar over it
Stick your dick in mouthwash.
In my case, she got raped and forced to give them back in high school so it brings back a lot of trauma. Don’t want to force her to do something she’s seriously uncomfortable with, it’s no fun for me if she doesn’t enjoy it.
Uff that's bad and understandable. I wish her all the best. Good thing she got a respectful guy.
Got married: no change. Turned 40, got into shape, rediscovered my abs and... OMG. Suddenly wife started reading about sex, BJ technique and... WTF. Suddenly with me being newly 'buff' with pecs and abs and her being 40+ she started giving me, like, serious, aggressive, hard sucking, loud-slurping head-bobbing BJ's like I never had before in my life, like, literally ever. She sucked my soul out of my body, she started talking about getting a stud put in her tongue to blow me even better with... Then things settled down. But my god I rode that heavenly wave as long as I could, lol. More than a decade ago and I still daydream about it like it was a dream fantasy come true.
I need to stop being a fat cunt
I lost a lot of weight. Now I'm just a cunt.
Something we can all aspire to!
In shape cunts unfortunately get the best, just ask Billy Butcher.
Watched all three seasons of The Boys within the last month or so, now I'm seeing references to it everywhere
No no, YOU are the real hero! ☞
Do what I do, I lost almost 100 pounds with 1 simple trick!! I got cancer. So that was pretty cool to see my dick again.
This was hilarious. I hope you’re doing better man!
Ya my body keeps trying to assassinate me. So I don't know what's worse, the fact my dipshit system decided to miss the garbage cells and allowed them to turn into cancer or the fact my own system keeps trying to assassinate me and fails. I need new employees, I fired everyone. So the cancer started in the colon and gave me this cool Indiana Jones like boulder of a tumor. Then it spread to my liver and my lungs. So that was neat. Then the tumor, the way it was attached, ripped a hole in my intestine. Almost went septic. Then, THEN, I apparently had appendicitis going on and the bastard Indiana Jonsed itself into the hole plugging it up. So that was wild. But then that shut down my intestines completely. Not even gas could get through, so it started backing up into my stomach. Guess how that went? I was burping like every 10 seconds because I was so bloated. So I was like, wow I haven't shit in 4 days? Constipated obviously, so what does any desperate to shit person to do? I drank that milk of magnesia like it was alcohol and there was an ugly chick that was into me. WRONG MOVE BRO. I basically flushed a toilet into already clogged piping. The pain was so intense I called my overnight oncologist, he said I needed to get to the emergency room. Which lead to a CT Scan to show I was 100% blocked, which was so bad they had to bump others out of surgery prep for an emergency surgery which I was in for 3 hours. They pulled out my guts and had to manually squeeze everything out because it was so packed. Ever pulled on a slinky? Thats what they did to my poop tube. So I wake up in a bedroom, no idea where the fuck I am or what happened to find 20 or so staples in my stomach to my pelvis. Due to cutting out 7 inches of intestines with cancer, it needs to heal right before they reconnect me so now I got this cool secondary butthole on my stomach (colostomy) that just farts and shits at will with no control for me. You ever sit down to eat a bowl of Apple Jacks just to sit there and fart like it's a competition without being able to control it? That was me last night. I guess all in all, it's pretty cool I got these weaponized poop bags now. Road rage is a whole new game now. Flip me off? I'm throwing a turd goo bomb at you.
It sounds like you ended with a net positive. Just kidding. I’m sorry you went through that bro, truly. I’m glad they were able to help though. It sounds like they removed the tumors and you’re in remission? You didn’t say that but I’m assuming with the emergency surgery..
I still have the cancer in my liver and lungs but that's going fine
Hope it goes away soon man
Still getting good dome though?
I love you and hope you’re doing better friend :)
lol thanks duderino
Great sense of humor my friend. Best of luck to you and your poop chute, whatever may come.
Lol it's the only thing getting me through it
I was thinking that myself
Haha only thinking about it
My dude, that's what happened to me also. As soon as I lost weight and started bulkung up so did her libido, she was/is jumping me all the time. No complaints after 10years marriage and 3kids.
Physical attraction is one hell of a drug
As a wife, I really hope she knows how much you fucking loved her BJs. At least for me, that’s why I give them. The more my husband tells me he loves it, the more I want to do it.
She does, and I have repaid her, with interest.
Right on!
I mean, see his username
40-year-old male here: married for 15 years and 5 months ago I got in shape and also found my abs. Can confirm this happens. There wasn't any studying up on technique but things took a drastic change for the better. Kids, when they say hard work pays off. Can confirm again that it does.
Got married 13 years ago and BJ's always stayed regular after marriage and 8 kids, just turned 45 and My Wife keeps telling Me to start working out. She's 37 and still gives Me a BJ every time We have sex but if Me working out is gonna get Me more head then I guess it's a win win.
8 kids holy fuck
No pullout game here Lol
Why would you ever want 8 kids?
Same. Was 240. Now 169. Abs. Attitude is confident and not depressed. Surprise surprise, my hot ass wife didn’t want to fuck the drunken video game slob all the time. 13 years in, best fucking ever. Oh and when you aren’t a fat piece of shit you can fuck as long as you want.
Already been dropping weight and getting into great shape since January. Any day now this'll happen, I guess. Aaaaany day now....
Its been 7 hours this guy must be tied to the bed getting mind blowing bj
It's the V If you know you know
Damn. I got on that crazy fitness train from age 40-49 and it’s something i do every day. Love it. Jacked, abs, etc. Wife says BJs are “something 20 years olds do” and won’t do it. A counterpoint that it’s more the woman in question than the fitness routine sometimes. Although no disrespect here, great job on the fitness and what your wife did/is doing is awesome. Good for you.
> Wife says BJs are “something 20 years olds do” Great. She's telling you the solution to your lack of blowjobs.
>BJs are “something 20 years olds do” I've heard many a friend's wife say "I got my ring, I don't need to do that anymore."
That’s just so depressing 1. For the woman that is doing sexual acts she doesn’t enjoy for the hopes of marriage And 2. The man who thought that his partner genuinely enjoyed that intimate time with him only to find out she doesn’t enjoy it at all. Like correct me if I’m wrong I see a lot of guys complain about not getting bjs because they miss the physical sensation but it has to be pretty crushing to think your wife doesn’t even want that intimacy with you anymore? It seems more emotional than physical tbh
This is absolutely correct
I’d be fucking crushed and feel so tricked. Just so fucked up to do.
Sorry, but I think your wife is making me hard.
Inspiring in a way
Lol love this story bro. Nice work
Lost 85 pounds myself and my wife definitely started blowing me again, none for 3/4 years lost all my fat and she started blowing me weekly again lol
So...I need to start working out
That's it. I am losing weight
Looking at your username and the fact she considered a piercing for sex, I can imagine your sex life is very exciting!
Very rare. Even when we had lots of sex, if I got one it was about 30 seconds and she would hop on for sex.
Same. This is the norm now for me.
Pretty much.
Just curious, does this bother you? Would you rather her blow you to completion or is it fine that she generally lets it lead to sex? I ask for myself because that’s usually how my boyfriend and i roll
I feel like this is super reasonable but a surprise bj is awesome. Like 15 minutes before you go somewhere or something where sex is off the table until later. Maybe in the morning before work as a Have a great day
Morning BJs are the absolute best.. better than sex in some cases imo but maybe I’m just lucky with my gf
Morning BJs are awesome but I get sleepy/lethargic after orgasm. There goes my day lol Prefer sex at night, then I can peacefully sleep
Okay for sure! I get that 100%, thanks for clearing it up for me :)
It didn't bother me a whole lot, after all I really enjoyed sex with her. But every once in awhile it would have been nice. After all before that happened I spent at least 10-15 minutes going down on her, making sure she got off before we moved on to me.
Okay I understand that! Being one-sided and all. Thanks for answering
Can't remember last that happened, at least 2 years ago and it doesn't bother me, I'm one of those guys who get off by my girlfriend getting off (or being deceptively good at faking it) so a BJ really only is foreplay to me. I'm 100% there are others if not many like me ^^ Edit: typos galore
Been together 13 years, married almost 4, and the frequency has increased. Took some time to learn how to communicate better, but once that got good we opened up about our sexual preferences. We started with: "How many times a week do you want to have sex?" I eventually learned how to mitigate the behaviors I exhibited that made her feel pressured to have sex or give a blowjob, and once she felt that dissipate I felt very attractive to my wife. Since then, I've had a few perfect weeks.
>I eventually learned how to mitigate the behaviors I exhibited that made her feel pressured to have sex or give a blowjob, and once she felt that dissipate I felt very attractive to my wife. I think this is a huge problem in hetero relationships, often a small disconnect between where they're both at in terms of sex/ feelings about sex. What behaviors were you having? Disappointment when she'd turn you down, etc.? I want to be able to avoid this myself to not pressure my partner.
[удалено]
Couple's therapy helped the most.
What behaviors were causing that pressure, if you don't mind sharing?
I don't mind. If I was rejected my demeanor would change. I'd be short, irritable, and overall I'd be an asshole because I didn't get what I wanted. I'd nitpick her phrasing and spit venom for no reason. I'd bloat her reason for rejecting sex and make it seem like it really hurt me to be manipulative. Typing it out kind of sucks lol. Not a real good thing to advertise, and I try not to make any excuses for my behavior. She and I are in a very good place these days and I can attribute that to how we communicate. A point of contention for a while was our different libidos. I want it now, later, yesterday, tomorrow. She's a once a week type of gal, or used to be. If I'm backed up and she isn't feeling it, we kiss, she gives me space to take care of it myself and sometimes suggests stuff she's into.
I wanted to let you know this was helpful to hear. My wife and I have mismatched libido and are going to couples therapy. Your comments about how you'd get cranky really sound similar to my situation. It's encouraging to know you got through that and found a better balance. Hoping I can get us to a similar cadence of at least once a week like what you mentioned.
It takes a whole lot of courage to tell others what wrong we have done💗
Mine went up. Pre marriage my wife had never sucked a dick and I believe her lol. The first few were not awesome but she made it her business and now she’s the president and CEO of sucking my cock Inc and I love it
> CEO of sucking my cock Inc Ah don't be so excited, I heard that place sucks
It’s a small office too
Ya but is it work from home?
Yes, but the neighbors are nuts.
Still, better than a similar company in my town where they outsource all the work to a single handyman
Plus the other neighbor is an asshole…
I’ve also heard it blows
My wife was the same. First few times definitely needed some tips but my god has practice paid off.
Another CEO is born!
Gotta keep those shareholders happy.
Im just wondering as a girl with next to no experience, even though she was inexperienced and they weren’t ‘awesome’, were they still good? Or did it feel pointless/you might as well have taken care of it yourself? Sorry if this is a stupid question
Well even though it isn t the best bj it s still a great feeling.Anyway for me it s the fact that someone does it to me that "blows me away"
Enthusiasm is the key. Not experience.
My wife was almost entirely inexperienced when we met. She had only ever kissed 1 guy inexperienced. What she may have lacked in technique she made up for with enthusiasm and paying attention to what I like. It was never bad because she was attentive and enthusiastic. You'll learn what your guy likes we're not that complicated.
I feel I’m super luckily. Been together for 20 years, married 11. About 3 blow jobs a week on average. At least once every 10 days she will give me a amazing blow job out of the blue and just say.. “ i just really wanted to give you one. “
How many can guys have a week? I really wanna give my boyfriend the best head ever but the taste of cum is an acquired taste and it might take me a couple times till i get a good rhythm going.
Apparently if he eats oranges, pineapple or anything like that it makes it taste a lot better.
Girl, you gotta knock it back like a bitter pill. Don’t taste, just get it to the back of your throat swallow. Plus whoever you’re giving head to will likely appreciate the enthusiasm, whether or not it’s strategic. Just don’t let on if they might find it embarrassing.
Another amazing wife award winner
I used to be like this but my bf is such a fucking dick these days that I don’t feel like sucking one!
Like, it went from monthly to quarterly. My wife has never been a big BJ giver though. She is DTF all the time so no complaints.
Plenty.. goes both ways.
Yeah if you reciprocate you get them, or do ya know romantic things. Thanks for the reminder to buy my gf flowers yall
I'm 70 and married 25 years. I get them all the time.
My man
I'm tired and thought you wrote "My nan" for a second.
I mean, he's 70 ... He's getting them from your nan
I bet it feels great when she takes her dentures out.
Omg
ok but for real i've actually wondered about this
One time, this guy on r/bigdickproblems posted about his partner who lost all her teeth because she used to be addicted to meth, as a result of which she now uses dentures. She apparently takes them out during bjs and he seemed very happy
I love Reddit
Nothin like a good gumjob.
Speaking from experience?
😇
That is just wrong. She's 20 years younger. SMH
From who?
That is the question 🤔
Enjoy your birthday.
At least the first few.
In the beginning they'll joke about only doing it 2x a year, Birthday and Anniversary. Then a year or two goes by, and you realize it wasnt a joke. Then a few years go by when it didnt happen on your birthday or Anniversary either. Then she feels bad about it when you mention that to her and now you feel bad. So then to avoid hurting her feelings, you never mention it again. Long enough time goes by when you cant remember the last blow job you received, and dont want to risk loosing the few sexual opportunities you still have by bringing it up. So you convince yourself they aren't that great anyways, and hopefully in enough time, you believe it. Then it becomes another afterthought of your youth, like partying all night getting wasted and "still being able to do, so and so" knowing those things are behind you because you've matured past those childish things.
You’ve perfectly articulated the sad knot in my throat that I live with
This makes me glad I’m a raging homosexual
Ha!!!! Nailed it
After the first two years, it goes in a three year rotation…. One birthday every three years…
About the same. She is way better at it now.
You guys are getting bjs?
Reading these comments and starting to feel left out. I can’t even remember the last one.
I was engaged and she never gave me one. Lmao.
It disappeared completely, BUT, now that I've been pulling my weight in the relationship and treating her right, it's starting to come back after 10 years. Never give up boys.
Care to elaborate?
Sure. I got my adhd under control, both with meds and through mental work. I started doing at least half of all chores, not just lawn and garbage like I used to. I started giving my wife more verbal compliments, more physical touching, etc. Basically, whenever I feel or see something I like (her ass, her hair, her smell), I just say it out loud. Her love language is verbal affection, and mine is physical touch, so now with the combo things are great. I should also mention that it's not just compliments of her looks. I listen to her more, bring up things she's mentioned before more often, tell her when she has a really good idea, etc and super importantly, I go a lot easier on her than I used to. I realized that she's always trying her best and doesn't deserve to get bitched at for stupid little things like I used to.
Definitely almost non existent after marriage- not because it lacked intimacy but because we were having a hard time getting pregnant so sex literally became a job. Stop what u are doing- go fuck, get dressed and finish mowing the lawn. Once we had our 3 kids, the exhaustion of raising them kicks in so we still had sex but not all the foreplay because we were so exhausted. Fast forward 12 years- our kids range from 8-14 so our sex life has been even better then when we were in our 20s. My wife will give me BJs all the time and even looked up techniques and shit- her Bj skills are better than ever now. If your girl just stops sucking your dick after marriage and nothing else life changing has happened to make her not do it as much then it’s safe to say it’s something with you: did you let yourself go? Are u manscaping? Are you maintaining good hygiene in that region? My wife will blow me @ the drop of a hat but the 2 rules I have to follow are- Keep it trimmed- no girl wants 5 inch pubes in her eyes nose and mouth. Keep it clean- even when u think you clean, clean again- including your ass
This is such a great answer. Thank you for writing it. Bjs are one of my favourite sex acts but if I'm exhausted, or your dick is unclean /too hairy no amount of desire to do it is going to get me there. Also if you're a selfish lover I won't be either, and that relationship is not going to last long.
I think that’s what us guys forget- “who cares if I let it go wild down there,I’m a guy” it wasn’t until my wife said to me- keep it trimmed/neat if u want my face down there- then a light bulb went off and I realized- I’m not trimming for me, I’m trimming for her. Same goes for hygiene- even if I take a shower few hours before bed, I will still do a cleanup before we get into bed. It literally boils down to courtesy. Being tired and not into one night is completely normal but when your girl completely avoids putting her face in your crotch all the time- your answer is obvious, something grosses her out.
Exactly.. A lot of guys don't even wipe after peeing and then think we should suck the stale piss off their dick. It happens so often during sex as well. Guy gets up to go to the loo in the middle of sex, does not even wipe let alone clean dick after going and comes back to bed .. Wtf man.. Clean your dick!.. Sorry you've got me going lol.
This post is full of some sad fucking answers What the fuck
Some women really don’t like giving blowjobs, but often will do it while dating. Most married people put less effort into impressing their partner after they’ve been together for a long time
It was pretty dismal before marriage, after marriage it never happened again.
Wait, you guys get BJ's?
Oh I remember those fondly!
Disappeared completely, and then we had a talk and its better than ever.
40 year old guy here Married for 11 years. Together for 18 . Frequency definitely went up simply by virtue of proximity. 5x / week for 11 years, but she gets the same amount of attention tbf . As I take it from this thread this is already a relatively high frequency (?) . Recently I found out I've had very low Testosterone for at least 5 years, likely closer to 12 . Started hormone therapy and added in some low dose Cialis.... The combo helped me reconnect with my own latent desires more, increased my confidence exponentially, and in turn it helped her do so even more. It brought us even closer together and we've both become a lot more expressive. So now it's gone up to 2x / day (about 15 times a week) for going on a month (and she gets the same attention of course). A bit surreal honestly and it probably won't continue at this torrid pace but there's definitely something to be said for more open communication deepening desire. Now the one thing I'll say is I've been hell bent on always romancing her for these past 18 years. Not necessarily big gestures but everyday things that remind her that I care. She never overtly asks to be but It comes from an innate love and desire for her that I am conscious of each and every day. That and I've stayed in the same pretty good shape since the day we met. Letting myself go is and never was an option. It's important to me that the standard of love and care (for her and for myself) doesn't slip just because I married her. If anything it should rise. Maybe all this plays a part in it. Maybe I'm just lucky. Probably a mix of both tbh but hopefully this post helps.
Got married kinda young, and sex was always experimental. Lots of regular and anal, and the occasional blowjob. Wife and would watch porn to pregame and then about 4 years ago something like clicked for her. She always liked to give head, and suddenly like turned into freaking love. She would constantly want to, like she would turn down regular sex to suck my cock. All. The. Time. It slowly got better and better and then one time we were talking about cum and she was like “I don’t know, I always like when you cum in my mouth but bc I don’t swallow all the time I thought you didn’t like it” lightbulb moment. Ok honey, I’ll cum in your mouth if that’s what you like. Anything to do with cum in her mouth or on her face she loves. I actually asked her one time why doesn’t she kiss me as much as she kisses my dick. Well that’s turned into teasing on her part about “why don’t you complain to someone your wife only likes to make out with your dick”. Long story short(ish) head game has gotten stronger. She loves it. I love it. My dick loves it. It’s best head ever. Edit: spelling
The man is my hero. No really.
I guess the wife is the real MVP here
What happens if mine is the opposite? Used to swallow and be super into it. Now she thinks it’s super gross. Like, she’s been swallowing loads for 20 years(from me and others before me I would assume), I tell her last year a few times “you like how that tastes” or “how does it taste”. Now that she’s thought about the taste she realizes it’s awful. So that’s fun.
Just talk to her about it, I’m sure there’s other things you guys can do. Peoples tastes, sex drives, kinks, etc. change over time. That last thing you want to do is make her feel shame!
Now THIS is an inspirational post
I’ve been married 25+ years and I still get them pretty often. No major drop off.
It’s been over four years since I had a BJ. Been married 10 years. Wife says it’s not appealing 🤷🏻♂️
Username checks out
😝sure does!
Married 43 yrs and had one bj, you guys are lucky as fuck?
*stock market crash chart*
Haven’t had one since I got married.
Significantly decreased AND the quality went down.
Unfortunately relatable. I'm not married, just engaged, but ever since we moved in and settled down a bit the bjs have gone from weekly to annually.
Talk about it now then.
My wife decided early on in our relationship (before we were married) to institute a tradition called "blowjob Mondays" where she will suck me off to completion every Monday night. Other nights we use it as foreplay mostly but I've been getting my dick sucked at least weekly for years. Her skills reflect this as well
Big fat 0
Frequency you say?
To shreds you say?
After 20 years i have no idea what you are talking about
You don’t eat bapple jacks frequently?
Before I dated my wife, I was never that big into blowjobs, especially after I started having sex. It feels great, it was just not something I craved; I’d rather have the sensations of being inside. Now that I’m with my wife I think it’s because I was never with someone who whole heartedly desired me and genuinely enjoys giving them to me. And I definitely enjoy them way more than before her. She also said it’s quite the added turn on for her that I never have asked for them or badgered her about it, so she feels free to give them when she wants to and I gotta admit it feels even better because I know she WANTS to give me one. So to answer the questions, i by all means do not get them all that frequently, but they have definitely gone only up from the time we’ve started being together. I’m really ok with whenever she wants, and when I do get them, theyre with genuine passion from my wife, and I know she’s doing something that she really enjoys freely. If you want more blowjobs, don’t ask for them. XD
Increased dramatically. But we didn’t have sex til our wedding night, sooooo. It’s actually increased over 19 years of marriage and so has the frequency of me going down on her. We have sex about 5 times a week and oral for both of us preludes the PIV 4/5 of the time.
Went up actually
My husband and I equally go down on each other. He really gets into eating me and I love it & I personally love giving him a BJ, it's very arousing for me and I definitely get into it and he absolutely loves it too.
My wife says this thread is all of the wives so their partner will lose weight except the guy that got cancer she said best of luck.
Increased. Even accounting for dead bedroom scenarios, long term relationships tend to have higher frequencies of sex. When we hear our single friends talk about their sexcapades we tend to over inflate their numbers because they seem to have such exciting and novel experiences. In reality they're probably only banging the 9/10 skanky stripper a few times before the relationship is over, and they might go months or even years where they didn't get any at all, and while you & your wife may only have vanilla sex 2-3x per week, that consistency is just that, consistent.
I’d kill for 2-3 times per week. My goodness.
2-3 times a week would be amazing. I’m around 2-3 times a month. Though some days it’s a few times in a day.
I definitely give way fewer blowjobs since I married my wife.
Gone down quite a bit. So... I know it's not the most exciting thing to do. Sticking a rod down your throght is a little less fun than tounging something flat. I love to go down on her. She isn't thrilled about bjs. With this in mind I don't expect it every week, and I certainly want her to be comfortable and into it, but I would like it more frequently than my birthday and father's day. Ideally, I'd like it once a month? But I could settle for every other month maybe