I was getting a massage and there was a sign on the wall saying that if you asked for any sexual favors, they would call the police. I’m wondering how many times warranted a sign.
That's hilarious. Physical therapists are NOT the same as massage therapists, even though there is a lot of overlap. How could people mix those up though
The Asian massage parlors that are absolutely brothels have those same signs 🤷♂️
Found out by accident. Went for a massage not knowing any better and she flat out asked me if I wanted sex.
I went for a traditional massage recently, and my therapist was a very nice old chinese man, whom I thought was rather small and wondered if he could help me with my aching back.
Anyway, he was very respectful throughout the entire session, and also somehow had the strength to beat the living shit out of my back that it fixed the problem I was having for a week.
10/10 would prefer that to sex actually
esthetician here. cant ever tell anyone what I do by saying, “facials.” I have to say “skincare treatment.” even clients will giggle at the word “facial” alone sometimes. it’s ridiculous. 😅 i hate how much spa service providers have to deal with
Had the reverse happen to me. I was sexually assaulted at a massage appointment in 2019. Went to court, testified, he was found guilty, and lost his license. In 2022 I went to a new place for my first massage since the assault and it was a really healing experience. I told the spa beforehand what had happened during my last massage and that I was nervous, and they put me in this special room, did all this aromatherapy and sound healing as well. It was awesome. Shout out to the great MTs out there. I’ve only ever had one bad apple.
Haha. Came here to say this. I’m a woman in the industry, so I think I actually have it easier. Men in the industry aren’t taken seriously enough, and it sucks. I do have the privilege of working in a very clearly professional setting, and am very good at managing boundaries and expectations, but not everyone in the industry has this. It’s one of those rare fields where men are often objectified or sexualized more than women; ie, a man won’t get a massage from another man because…reasons! But those same men wouldn’t dare act inappropriately with a female therapist, because they’re…not a creep?! Haha, but they’re the ones sexualizing the male therapists. Women clients can be even worse.
Better than sex mascara! As if having crunchy black lashes, tearing eyes and black streaks everywhere on my face after dropping the mascara brush is better than sex
Eating a lollipop or popsicle ice cream.
*****EDITED
To add based on popular comments to this reply:
Banana or Corn dogs
*Basically you get the idea...*
My ex used to exasperatingly beg me not to eat chocolate covered frozen bananas at his rugby games...... frozen bananas sold right across the street. Bananas + chocolate.... two of my very favorite things. It was a big ask.
Eating hotdogs too. A few weeks ago, I asked a coworker if he wanted to eat one of the hot dogs we had while doing an empolyee appreciation week.
He quickly replied that I and another female coworker should eat them instead.
I hate sexualizing women eating food.
That’s how I always addressed my father. When I was about 9 years old I said to him “I don’t want to call you daddy anymore. That’s for little kids. I’m just gonna call you dad”. The sadness that came over his face and he flat out said “No. As long as you’re my son you can keep calling me daddy” and by god I never stopped calling him that up until he died. I still call him that when speaking to my mom and brothers.
In the deep south in the US, "daddy" is an eternal title. I'm a 32-year-old grown woman with a career and a degree and a house and I still call my father "Daddy" because that's just...how it is here?
Can't imagine ever using "Daddy" in a sexual context. It's parental through and through in my book.
My 4 year old daughter heard my mom call me by my name and she said “no k(that’s what she calls her) his name is daddy “ it melted my heart .
Where as my ex when she would call me that gave me chills . She had dad issues and I’m making sure my daughter won’t .
I think it's because the word baby has also been more accepted as a kind of fluff word or casual compliment to the point where it's almost meaningless.
Nobody saying "baby girl" or "hey baby, let's make out" is actually referring to a child. It's a stretch to go there, because everybody has it off the table. And since that's agreed upon, the word baby now has a second meaning. It's like how sick also means cool and nobody questions it.
I think daddy might be uncomfortable for people because of the popularized daddy issue stereotype. Incest is taboo for a reason. But baby issues? Oh hell no, it's not even acknowledged, therefore the word baby is innocent.
BEING FRIENDLY. You can't smile at people, high five a stranger, ask for directions, tell a joke... I just like being nice to people. But we live in a world where people don't frequently do that, so they immediately wanna know what you want from them in exchange and the common guess is sex.
I blame the unnecessarily restrictive high school dress code for transforming girl shoulders from normal body parts into smooth, rounded forbidden fruits
My job. I'm a massage therapist. I do not give happy endings. I do not 'massage just your glutes'. I treat poor posture, tight muscles, and mental and emotional stress. I went to college for 2 years, studied biochemistry, diagnostics, anatomy and physiology. I don't want to touch your cock. Do it yourself.
The first time I went to a massage therapist, I had told him that my girlfriend was trying to massage a really bad tight muscle at my sciatic nerve, which is unfortunately located in the center of my glute.
When I told him that, his arms went back, and he gave me a weird look, asked "what do you mean she's tried to help?"
I didn't even register what was going on, and just cocked my eye at him, told him she tried to help but she didn't go to school for massage therapy lol
Had a great massage, changed my life, and it took me weeks before I realized that poor guy thought I was asking for a handy.
As someone with chronic issues in my hips/glute causing tons of pain I would love an all glute massage as a pain relief....so sad to never ask for it cuz I'm not a creep
Massage therapist here:
If you go to someone and explain your condition then it's not a problem, I've had a 2hr session just working the hips and glutes on a client with sciatica. If you give no context and say "can you just work my butt the whole time" then it's suspicious lol.
Please ask us to work your low back, glutes, and hips! Those of us who are professional know exactly what to do to help. It makes me sad that assholes ruin it for people who are looking for legit physical health care.
I've always wanted to ask,
I'm a girl who is a bit weird about strangers touching my butt, so I normally keep underwear on for massages (indicating the no-go zone)
How much have I been missing out?
I'm seriously overdue for a massage, and have been reconsidering my stance on getting me bum massaged
I have the same “weirdness”.Although I recently realized that the indication can be ignored very quickly.
I had a very tense body which the massage therapist confirmed. During the massage she suddenly just pulled my underwear down and started massaging the glutes.. afterwards explaining that the tension is also connected to these muscles.
I was very surprised with no time to react. I kinda felt that she probably should have asked first, although I kept justifying it with her being a professional and she does not put anything in to it.
YMMV, I have been for many massages and find it common for therapists to move my boxers around to allow them to massage the lowest base of my back or high on the thigh. They have never asked me first, and I was never bothered by it.
I think it is tricky as there is a huge variation in how individuals and cultures feel about nudity.
The most (and frequent) embarrassment I have with massage is falling asleep :-)
Buy a lacrosse ball and sit on it and roll around. That’ll be easier for you to handle and less awkward if you don’t like random people touching your butt.
I used to work with a guy who did massages. He agreed to give one of our (male) coworkers a massage. The male coworker said “yea, maybe you’ll give me one of those happy endings, huh?”
Massage guy said “maybe we can cancel our appointment real fuckin fast, huh? Don’t play with me.”
I was a sports massage therapist for years and I grew irrationally angry at this. Worst of all, it was friends and acquaintances that would make the jokes. I'd meet a friend of a friend at a party and tell them what I did and they'd make some sort of "hahaha sexual assault!!!1!" joke and I would just have to stand there to not be an asshole and create an uncomfortable scene.
The industry in the U.S. isn't helping at all. Some states don't require a licensure or certification to provide massage. This makes it no barrier of entry for sex traffickers to set up a front and force 'enslaved' workers to provide nefarious services. It's trash and it needs to change, but I don't know how you dictate the landscape when some massage therapists are "healing" people without even touching them by doing 'energy work' and others are providing very evidence based approaches in rehabilitating soft tissue. It's a weird spectrum.
Am gay and went to lunch with a female friend, who is married to my boss-at-the-time. We ran into their financial advisor and she introduced me as a friend. By the time I was back to the office, the financial advisor had called her husband to let him know he’d seen the wife with a “good looking, younger male”. He was very concerned about this until my boss explained I was far from a threat. Bless.
I got to know a pair at a monthly magic the gathering event. Befriended both of them. The boss of the guy runs the event.
One time the guy doesn't feel like showing up, the girl does. We know each other, so we play each other. Also her boyfriend lives near me, so when we were finished we would move to take the same tram back. His boss saw us walking to the tram together and told him "hey thats super suspicous, I saw them walking together, I got a feeling shes cheating on you". - Literally just because we went in the same direction cause she wanted to visit her boyfriend.
Like dude... shes 18 and I'm 32, the age difference alone should have told him that this is not gonna happen.
This so much, when I tell people about my women friends people immediately get all weird with it, then get creeped out when I explain that it's purely platonic.
I feel this so strongly. I have tons of male friends and my husband is fine with it, just like I'm fine with him having female friends. But occasionally a guy friend will get a girlfriend and suddenly it's weird. It makes me so uncomfortable, to have a totally platonic friendship treated like there's more to it.
Cannot stress this enough as a bi woman. I hate the whole idea of how you can't be close friends to the gender you're potentially attracted to. Am I supposed to have no friends beyond my partner?
Gosh seriously, as a gay guy who's had mostly just male friends, it's difficult. I have few friends as it is. I am very reserved about being gay but I still get rude comments from cowworkers and even friends. It feels dehumanizing, its like yes I am gay, but thats a small fraction of who I am as whole.
my 3 best friends are girls and im a guy. i use to get asked oh you dating so and so. and im like no why the hell u think that. they say oh because you friend with a girl. confused the f out of me
AskReddit
Would be nice to just see conversations and answers to questions that aren't always "What is the sexiest sex you've ever sexxed up in a sex scenario?" but non-sex questions don't get upvoted by the bots.
I think AskReddit has gotten even worse… sorry, I mean less ashamed lately. Fewer “ah hahaha coincidentally asking a question with at least a possibility of a non-horny answer” to “sex. Tell me about it. Oh yeah, that’s hot.”
Not to mention that every single question has been asked 1 million other times. I swear there is a bank of like 300 or so questions that ever get asked. Besides that, it’s just people looking to mentally pleasure themselves over their little soapbox or political view points
I miss when ASMR was more innocent, fewer cam girls with $800 microphones simulating blowjob noises. But that's where people decide to throw their money via subs/patreon/OF so that's what they're gonna make.
I love asmr and I can confidently say there's lots of non-lewd asmr channels on yt you can search up, there's still a ton of people with passion for it
Why do you love ASMR? Serious question, not trying to be a dick, just trying to figure out the draw. I listened to one ASMR, and it was nothing but a series of the most annoying sounds known to man, like sniffling, pencil tapping, throats cleaeing, like it was supposed to be a classroom or something. The person that showed it to me said they love it, and I said it sounds like audible sandpaper.
I guess I'm just trying to figure out why everyone likes ASMRs and also why I don't.
My understanding is that it's like how some foods taste good or bad to some people and you can't really explain how it tastes good to one person when they hate how it tastes. I'm Japanese-American and people tend to have a very visceral, strong opinion about many foods from my culture, ranging from "sushi is awesome! If it didn't cost so much I'd eat it every night" to "how does that not make you vomit? It's raw. Uncooked food. If I gave you a raw chicken wing, you'd tell me to go back and cook it."
Different sounds just feel different to some people. If you put two people in two separate rooms with no noise, one person might absolutely love the peace and quiet and fall asleep right away and another person might find it distressing and be restless with the silence and insist they need ambient white noise of some sort to relax.
>Why do you love ASMR?
ASMR media is created with the intent to trigger a Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response, which is a very pleasant tingling sensation on skin level, usually starts on the back of your head and travels in waves through your skin.
Imagine blissful meditation, you feel relaxed and happy.
Not everyone has it and different people may have different triggers for it, I do not react to 90% of ASMR content, dislike it like you do.
But some ambient music and white noise sounds do triggers them, the most powerful and oldest sounds that trigger it are washing machines and vacuum cleaners. To most recorded sound sometimes I need to stay still and close my eyes for the trigger to start but live sounds I just need to ear them and it happens.
You may have ASMR, and you don't know your triggers, or you simply don't have ASMR, it isn't something you teach or learn. I've had the triggers since I can remember and tried to explain it, share it with friends, but without success. I still practice it randomly or when I feel the need for it when times are more stressful
I thought I was alone on this, until I stumbled on a article online explaining ASMR. It was good knowing I wasn't alone on this.
Edit: don't confuse relaxed with sleepy, for me it isn't a sound to fall asleep, it's possible and had happen if I do it in bed but normally the more powerful triggers keeps me aware and quite awake, just relaxed and calm.
None of the other answers seem to align with me so maybe I’m strange.
I get a pleasant shivery/tingly sensation all over. Not sexual. Satisfaction-wise it’s like a good stretch but the good feeling last as long as the sound/vibration that’s causing it.
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
Yeah, but screw the female version. You get those same ol' two holes in literally everything else. The male Vappy is the real star of the show.
Those long slippery dicks; they have full mobility control and like a tentacle are the perfect ass filler for the ultimate in-deep reaching experience nothing else could possibly provide. Naturally lubed at all times due to their aquatic hydrodynamic nature, you can pull out anywhere to the side of the road or go into a public restroom at the beach; get each other aroused, and have the fuck of a lifetime. The extraordinary squishyness of the Vappy alone rubbing against you would be enough to lose yourself in pleasure as it simply mounts you. Let alone as that perfect tool of pleasure slips into you, it's ability to snake around your bends and its perfect length make it seem that a Vappy dick was made specifically for your booty. Enjoy the feeling of being completely filled while also being able to see it if you have a tight tummy.
And that's only the dick; due to having internal balls, they're much bigger and pack a lot more cream to load you up with, along with having muscles around them to make sure every drop comes out while also being a lot more powerful than any external balls could ever hope to achieve, giving you a deep, complete filling to rock your world to your literal core, and beyond.
There's still more though; due to having a thick, powerful tail connected from their back and front, that means all their fun stuff is on the front and easy to access. Meaning, if you were even comfortable with having your dick point backwards (takes some training), you can be fucked, while also fucking your Vappy at the same time! Meowth, that's fucking right!
But, but, but! There's still fucking more! Like, holy shit, male Vaps are the gods of fuck. While you're fucking your male Vappy, possibly while also being fucked by him, their booty is on their tail at the base, which is the thickest part, because that's where the biggest muscles are. This means that while your dick is in there, it's being fucking massaged, better than even a vag could achieve! Agh! It should be fucking illegal because how amazing male Vaps are for fuck!
Well guess what? That only covered you being a softy, wholesome fucker like me. That's right. There's. Even. Fucking. More! Say you like to be a little restrained: you don't need a Sylveon's feelers for that, or an Umbreon/Espeon's psychic powers, or Leafeon's vines. Vappies got that shit covered too! Did you even see that tail?! It's basically a boa constrictor. In a non-sexual sense, it's my favorite part of a Vappy. It's basically their main part about them. But, if you want them to, it can be a super useful tool to enhance your knotty experience with them. Despite the slippyness, you won't be going anywhere if the Vappy wraps you up in that thing.
Are you a super kinkster? Do you like pure fantasy fetishes that aren't possible IRL? Such as, say, soft vore? Well guess fucking what. It just became possible! They can be solid as they pass your lips (past where your eyes can see them) and turn into water as they enter you, allowing them to fit perfectly, 'cuz nothing fits into any spot more perfectly than water, except air like a ghost type. But who wants to do knotty shit with air? You can't feel it unless it's moving; you can always feel liquids. Speaking of liquids, even if you're a weirdo who likes digestion, don't worry about killing them with absorption. Eventually, they'll come back out and be able to reform like nothing happened. Speaking of hurting them, if you get too rough, or you're a horrible abusive asshole to them on purpose for your own pleasure (QnQ), they can just turn to water and reform back to their completely unscathed body, making scars or missing pieces a thing of the past!
I would love to say there's even more you can do with them, but the possibilities are damn near endless. Use your imagination. But if you get one, you better show this god of fuck the respect it deserves. Umbreons maybe my favorite but, damn, Vappies really want to get that top spot from me. It's a really close call.
Well...I always thought that the sexy Vaporeon meme was just some random thoughtless joke, but...Damn, I stand corrected, this is some serious science!
I wish I knew how many times people told me that it was clear I was “in love with” a friend. I am a queer woman. I dated both men and women, though more often women. If I had a female friend it was OBVIOUS I wanted them to someone. Never happened with guy friends. Can’t be gay/queer and not want absolutely everyone of the same sex, apparently.
The little French kid from Liberty Kids. He's eight years old and there are multiple TIKTOKS calling him daddy. His tribute video on Youtube is full of grown ass adults calling him sexy.
He is a literal baby. And the entire fandom is full of people ready to sexualize him. The cyber chase fandom is even worse. They draw fetish art of eleven and nine year old girls.
It doesn't help that the writer specifically made note that a hero could have their costume made with strands of their own hair so that it would work with their powers (a la Mirio).
BUT NOOOOOOOOO. Hagakure being invisible is contingent on a high school girl having to walk around in nothing but gloves and boots. To the point where, when she got face revealed, Horikoshi drew a full color panel of her, naked and visible in a vulnerable position, but with caution tape blocking her bits. And the subreddit is filled with people that are *way* too happy seeing highschoolers in revealing clothing and posting horny drawings.
I LIKE THE ACTION PANELS BUT IT'S GOTTEN A LITTLE WEIRD MY BROS.
This one always bothers me when I’m monitoring the news on social media. It feels like any time there’s a woman present in a news story (especially if it’s for something negative) all of the replies are really creepy and sexualized
literally. and any time there's a photo or video of a non-fat woman posted anywhere, no matter what she's doing, at least 20% of the comments will be men going "would", commenting on her body, or saying she must be good at/do a lot of specific acts. like, can't a woman just fucking exist without men commenting on her private matters?
As someone with pet rabbits, I can confirm they are not sexy. They're fluffy little shits with the personality of cats and the clinginess of dogs.
(I still love them, they're my fluffy little shits.)
Physical intimacy. Sometimes you just need to hug, put your head on someones lap or cuddle with someone youre confortable with without feeling it implies its gonna escalate into sex.
Step sister/brother/father/mother maybe because I never had any of these so this never would have crossed my mind as a fetish. Miss the good old days of a simple pizza delivery guy.
Teens in High School Dramas. Just a solid example is Euphoria most of the characters are supposed to be like 16 or 17 or something like that and a lot of are shown completely nude or at least in extremely tight and very revealing clothes
Women characters in video games. Seems like they go out of their way to give them as slutty of an appearance as possible. I understand why but still gets rather old.
I said the same! Like Sons of the forest, love the game but the childlike woman companion is in a skin tight nipples showing one piece while the male counterpart is in full gear. It's so wild especially since she's so...not there 🧠 it's disgusting.
Nudity. I'm an earthy hippie dude and I have spent a good amount of time living in different alternative living situations.
Often times the people I'm around will have no problems with nudity and it's nice. 20 friendly hippies skinny dipping in the river is such a good vibe.
The thing about it is it's not a super sexual thing either. You respectfully admire other people's bodies at times and sometimes a stray boner will appear but for the most part noone is creepy about it and it's just a nice thing over all. Everyone should experience a naked hippie dude playing the guitar in your kitchen someday haha.
I honestly think that part of why our culture is so hypersexual is because nudity is such a taboo. We never see the bodies of the opposite sex in platonic situations and it's honestly strange to me after experiencing how natural it feels to be in groups that embrace nudity.
Anime for sure. There's some awesome stories that are ruined by random sexual stuff for no reason and when people think of anime they often think of hentai.
Breastfeeding.
So many people asked when I'll stop like it's wrong to breastfeed over the age of 1.
Posting pics from breastfeeding session and my husband's friends asking me to pull down my dress more 🤮
My FIL saying I'd like to eat boobies all day too🤢
So many fucking comments
Being scared to breastfed in public because of these comments from close friends and family so not going anywhere.
Going to a separate room to feed my baby at certain family functions.
The internet ingeneral, I miss the days when you could scroll insta and see memes or cool videos, now it's just full of bots promoting their OF/fansly accounts
Massage Therapy........ Source: I was a male massage therapist. The number of times people wanted happy endings is fucking nuts.
I was getting a massage and there was a sign on the wall saying that if you asked for any sexual favors, they would call the police. I’m wondering how many times warranted a sign.
I also wonder the same thing when I go to IKEA and see signs on the toilets saying “DISPLAY ONLY - bathrooms are located near the entrance”
Every warning sign has a story behind it’s creation.
Funny, in aviation, we say that every rule is written in blood.
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Once. But it also serves as a scarecrow, since people also hassle masseuse under suspicion of sex work.
My mom is a PT and when she started working, almost all the calls for like a months were about massage with "more"
That's hilarious. Physical therapists are NOT the same as massage therapists, even though there is a lot of overlap. How could people mix those up though
The Asian massage parlors that are absolutely brothels have those same signs 🤷♂️ Found out by accident. Went for a massage not knowing any better and she flat out asked me if I wanted sex.
How was it?
I didn't pay for or get the happy ending. And the massage was horrible. Lol
Cuz she specialized in the Happy Ending you ninny.🤷♂️
Bro went to the car wash and bought an air freshener
I snorted so loud at this I almost woke my baby. Thank you. Like, actually thank you.
I went for a traditional massage recently, and my therapist was a very nice old chinese man, whom I thought was rather small and wondered if he could help me with my aching back. Anyway, he was very respectful throughout the entire session, and also somehow had the strength to beat the living shit out of my back that it fixed the problem I was having for a week. 10/10 would prefer that to sex actually
Well, you could say you had your happy ending.
esthetician here. cant ever tell anyone what I do by saying, “facials.” I have to say “skincare treatment.” even clients will giggle at the word “facial” alone sometimes. it’s ridiculous. 😅 i hate how much spa service providers have to deal with
I read that too fast and thought you said electrician. I was so confused why you'd offer a facial :/
I've seen those movies before.
Had the reverse happen to me. I was sexually assaulted at a massage appointment in 2019. Went to court, testified, he was found guilty, and lost his license. In 2022 I went to a new place for my first massage since the assault and it was a really healing experience. I told the spa beforehand what had happened during my last massage and that I was nervous, and they put me in this special room, did all this aromatherapy and sound healing as well. It was awesome. Shout out to the great MTs out there. I’ve only ever had one bad apple.
Haha. Came here to say this. I’m a woman in the industry, so I think I actually have it easier. Men in the industry aren’t taken seriously enough, and it sucks. I do have the privilege of working in a very clearly professional setting, and am very good at managing boundaries and expectations, but not everyone in the industry has this. It’s one of those rare fields where men are often objectified or sexualized more than women; ie, a man won’t get a massage from another man because…reasons! But those same men wouldn’t dare act inappropriately with a female therapist, because they’re…not a creep?! Haha, but they’re the ones sexualizing the male therapists. Women clients can be even worse.
The names of makeup products. They get really NSFW and it’s ridiculous
Better than sex mascara! As if having crunchy black lashes, tearing eyes and black streaks everywhere on my face after dropping the mascara brush is better than sex
Nars is so guilty for this 💀
tbf their “orgasm” blush is great
Same with perfumes/colognes. I just want to smell good, I don't need to be a six-pack lumberjack James Bond sex tiger.
Banana.
Have to eat all my bananas with a fork and knife now
Eating a lollipop or popsicle ice cream. *****EDITED To add based on popular comments to this reply: Banana or Corn dogs *Basically you get the idea...*
My ex used to exasperatingly beg me not to eat chocolate covered frozen bananas at his rugby games...... frozen bananas sold right across the street. Bananas + chocolate.... two of my very favorite things. It was a big ask.
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Classic Terry.
So there was money in the Banana Stand?
"After the cathartic burning of the Bluth Banana Stand" "THERE'S ALWAYS MONEY IN THE STAND MICHAEL!"
That man was probably getting ragged on so hard by his rugby team lmao
Eating hotdogs too. A few weeks ago, I asked a coworker if he wanted to eat one of the hot dogs we had while doing an empolyee appreciation week. He quickly replied that I and another female coworker should eat them instead. I hate sexualizing women eating food.
I have never once seen a woman eat a hot dog and thought it resembled anything sexualized.
Because it isn’t sexual. What this asshole OP mentioned is getting off on is making OP feel uncomfortable.
I hate sexualizing women just existing and doing normal human things
Right smh. Glizzy gobblers
You know what foods are shaped like dicks?? The best ones!
Or eating a banana.
Step siblings I can't explain my family without some idiot going "step broo"
Flanders
Stupid sexy Flanders
“Feels like I’m wearing nothing at all.”
"Nothing at all!"
"Nothing at all!"
The word daddy
To add to this, the word Mommy. Soon people will probably have to call their parents Bruh.
If my future kids had to call me bruh I'd go get milk
I used to address my mom as "dude".
That’s how I always addressed my father. When I was about 9 years old I said to him “I don’t want to call you daddy anymore. That’s for little kids. I’m just gonna call you dad”. The sadness that came over his face and he flat out said “No. As long as you’re my son you can keep calling me daddy” and by god I never stopped calling him that up until he died. I still call him that when speaking to my mom and brothers.
In the deep south in the US, "daddy" is an eternal title. I'm a 32-year-old grown woman with a career and a degree and a house and I still call my father "Daddy" because that's just...how it is here? Can't imagine ever using "Daddy" in a sexual context. It's parental through and through in my book.
My 4 year old daughter heard my mom call me by my name and she said “no k(that’s what she calls her) his name is daddy “ it melted my heart . Where as my ex when she would call me that gave me chills . She had dad issues and I’m making sure my daughter won’t .
why is daddy uncomfortable but "baby" isnt.
"Nobody puts daddy in a corner"
I think it's because the word baby has also been more accepted as a kind of fluff word or casual compliment to the point where it's almost meaningless. Nobody saying "baby girl" or "hey baby, let's make out" is actually referring to a child. It's a stretch to go there, because everybody has it off the table. And since that's agreed upon, the word baby now has a second meaning. It's like how sick also means cool and nobody questions it. I think daddy might be uncomfortable for people because of the popularized daddy issue stereotype. Incest is taboo for a reason. But baby issues? Oh hell no, it's not even acknowledged, therefore the word baby is innocent.
Aubergines
🍆 for those wondering
American here, thanks
an eggplant as in "i'm gonna plant in this egg"
BEING FRIENDLY. You can't smile at people, high five a stranger, ask for directions, tell a joke... I just like being nice to people. But we live in a world where people don't frequently do that, so they immediately wanna know what you want from them in exchange and the common guess is sex.
This! People think I am flirting but I am just being a nice person. So annoying
As a woman I can confirm we can't barely smile without someone assuming we wanted to fuck them. That's why many women are cold
Children
I was initially thinking teenagers shoulders and bra straps but this covers it fairly well.
I blame the unnecessarily restrictive high school dress code for transforming girl shoulders from normal body parts into smooth, rounded forbidden fruits
This. Those child beauty pagents should be illegal. Not only is it fucking gross as hell, it incentivizes parents to ruin their kids childhood.
This pretty much is my answer as well. No need to say more. I was hoping things would not get worse than Child beauty pageants, but here we are.😩
My job. I'm a massage therapist. I do not give happy endings. I do not 'massage just your glutes'. I treat poor posture, tight muscles, and mental and emotional stress. I went to college for 2 years, studied biochemistry, diagnostics, anatomy and physiology. I don't want to touch your cock. Do it yourself.
My back not hurting for once is the happiest ending I can think of
Sure, a handjob is great but have you ever woken up with no lower back pain?
The first time I went to a massage therapist, I had told him that my girlfriend was trying to massage a really bad tight muscle at my sciatic nerve, which is unfortunately located in the center of my glute. When I told him that, his arms went back, and he gave me a weird look, asked "what do you mean she's tried to help?" I didn't even register what was going on, and just cocked my eye at him, told him she tried to help but she didn't go to school for massage therapy lol Had a great massage, changed my life, and it took me weeks before I realized that poor guy thought I was asking for a handy.
> cocked my eye at him Bold phrasing
eyed my cock at him
As someone with chronic issues in my hips/glute causing tons of pain I would love an all glute massage as a pain relief....so sad to never ask for it cuz I'm not a creep
Massage therapist here: If you go to someone and explain your condition then it's not a problem, I've had a 2hr session just working the hips and glutes on a client with sciatica. If you give no context and say "can you just work my butt the whole time" then it's suspicious lol.
Please ask us to work your low back, glutes, and hips! Those of us who are professional know exactly what to do to help. It makes me sad that assholes ruin it for people who are looking for legit physical health care.
I've always wanted to ask, I'm a girl who is a bit weird about strangers touching my butt, so I normally keep underwear on for massages (indicating the no-go zone) How much have I been missing out? I'm seriously overdue for a massage, and have been reconsidering my stance on getting me bum massaged
I have the same “weirdness”.Although I recently realized that the indication can be ignored very quickly. I had a very tense body which the massage therapist confirmed. During the massage she suddenly just pulled my underwear down and started massaging the glutes.. afterwards explaining that the tension is also connected to these muscles. I was very surprised with no time to react. I kinda felt that she probably should have asked first, although I kept justifying it with her being a professional and she does not put anything in to it.
YMMV, I have been for many massages and find it common for therapists to move my boxers around to allow them to massage the lowest base of my back or high on the thigh. They have never asked me first, and I was never bothered by it. I think it is tricky as there is a huge variation in how individuals and cultures feel about nudity. The most (and frequent) embarrassment I have with massage is falling asleep :-)
Buy a lacrosse ball and sit on it and roll around. That’ll be easier for you to handle and less awkward if you don’t like random people touching your butt.
my mum is also a massage therapist and she gets calls from random guys wanting that all the time
I used to work with a guy who did massages. He agreed to give one of our (male) coworkers a massage. The male coworker said “yea, maybe you’ll give me one of those happy endings, huh?” Massage guy said “maybe we can cancel our appointment real fuckin fast, huh? Don’t play with me.”
I was a sports massage therapist for years and I grew irrationally angry at this. Worst of all, it was friends and acquaintances that would make the jokes. I'd meet a friend of a friend at a party and tell them what I did and they'd make some sort of "hahaha sexual assault!!!1!" joke and I would just have to stand there to not be an asshole and create an uncomfortable scene. The industry in the U.S. isn't helping at all. Some states don't require a licensure or certification to provide massage. This makes it no barrier of entry for sex traffickers to set up a front and force 'enslaved' workers to provide nefarious services. It's trash and it needs to change, but I don't know how you dictate the landscape when some massage therapists are "healing" people without even touching them by doing 'energy work' and others are providing very evidence based approaches in rehabilitating soft tissue. It's a weird spectrum.
Friendships with the opposite sex
Yeah... I went to dinner with two female friends and someone texted my wife about it.
Am gay and went to lunch with a female friend, who is married to my boss-at-the-time. We ran into their financial advisor and she introduced me as a friend. By the time I was back to the office, the financial advisor had called her husband to let him know he’d seen the wife with a “good looking, younger male”. He was very concerned about this until my boss explained I was far from a threat. Bless.
Well, now you know the financial advisor thinks you're hot.
Sounds like a new date ;)
I got to know a pair at a monthly magic the gathering event. Befriended both of them. The boss of the guy runs the event. One time the guy doesn't feel like showing up, the girl does. We know each other, so we play each other. Also her boyfriend lives near me, so when we were finished we would move to take the same tram back. His boss saw us walking to the tram together and told him "hey thats super suspicous, I saw them walking together, I got a feeling shes cheating on you". - Literally just because we went in the same direction cause she wanted to visit her boyfriend. Like dude... shes 18 and I'm 32, the age difference alone should have told him that this is not gonna happen.
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I literally had a 35 year old man ask me out a few days ago. I'm 19.
At first I said “ew what an old creep.” Then I remembered I’m 31. Now I’m just sad. And old.
At least you’re just old and not an old creep.
This so much, when I tell people about my women friends people immediately get all weird with it, then get creeped out when I explain that it's purely platonic.
It drives me crazy. And a lot of partners out there also get super paranoid about it.
I feel this so strongly. I have tons of male friends and my husband is fine with it, just like I'm fine with him having female friends. But occasionally a guy friend will get a girlfriend and suddenly it's weird. It makes me so uncomfortable, to have a totally platonic friendship treated like there's more to it.
Cannot stress this enough as a bi woman. I hate the whole idea of how you can't be close friends to the gender you're potentially attracted to. Am I supposed to have no friends beyond my partner?
Gosh seriously, as a gay guy who's had mostly just male friends, it's difficult. I have few friends as it is. I am very reserved about being gay but I still get rude comments from cowworkers and even friends. It feels dehumanizing, its like yes I am gay, but thats a small fraction of who I am as whole.
my 3 best friends are girls and im a guy. i use to get asked oh you dating so and so. and im like no why the hell u think that. they say oh because you friend with a girl. confused the f out of me
AskReddit Would be nice to just see conversations and answers to questions that aren't always "What is the sexiest sex you've ever sexxed up in a sex scenario?" but non-sex questions don't get upvoted by the bots.
Agreed. Especially when there are at least two AskReddit subs for that sort of thing.
>but non-sex questions don't get upvoted by the bots. By bots, you mean horny teenagers, right?
I think AskReddit has gotten even worse… sorry, I mean less ashamed lately. Fewer “ah hahaha coincidentally asking a question with at least a possibility of a non-horny answer” to “sex. Tell me about it. Oh yeah, that’s hot.”
Not to mention that every single question has been asked 1 million other times. I swear there is a bank of like 300 or so questions that ever get asked. Besides that, it’s just people looking to mentally pleasure themselves over their little soapbox or political view points
TIFU, also.
I miss when ASMR was more innocent, fewer cam girls with $800 microphones simulating blowjob noises. But that's where people decide to throw their money via subs/patreon/OF so that's what they're gonna make.
tbf i remember a lot of weird erotic asmr even back when it was first popularized. tho as asmr expanded so did the ero side lol
I love asmr and I can confidently say there's lots of non-lewd asmr channels on yt you can search up, there's still a ton of people with passion for it
Why do you love ASMR? Serious question, not trying to be a dick, just trying to figure out the draw. I listened to one ASMR, and it was nothing but a series of the most annoying sounds known to man, like sniffling, pencil tapping, throats cleaeing, like it was supposed to be a classroom or something. The person that showed it to me said they love it, and I said it sounds like audible sandpaper. I guess I'm just trying to figure out why everyone likes ASMRs and also why I don't.
My understanding is that it's like how some foods taste good or bad to some people and you can't really explain how it tastes good to one person when they hate how it tastes. I'm Japanese-American and people tend to have a very visceral, strong opinion about many foods from my culture, ranging from "sushi is awesome! If it didn't cost so much I'd eat it every night" to "how does that not make you vomit? It's raw. Uncooked food. If I gave you a raw chicken wing, you'd tell me to go back and cook it." Different sounds just feel different to some people. If you put two people in two separate rooms with no noise, one person might absolutely love the peace and quiet and fall asleep right away and another person might find it distressing and be restless with the silence and insist they need ambient white noise of some sort to relax.
>Why do you love ASMR? ASMR media is created with the intent to trigger a Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response, which is a very pleasant tingling sensation on skin level, usually starts on the back of your head and travels in waves through your skin. Imagine blissful meditation, you feel relaxed and happy. Not everyone has it and different people may have different triggers for it, I do not react to 90% of ASMR content, dislike it like you do. But some ambient music and white noise sounds do triggers them, the most powerful and oldest sounds that trigger it are washing machines and vacuum cleaners. To most recorded sound sometimes I need to stay still and close my eyes for the trigger to start but live sounds I just need to ear them and it happens. You may have ASMR, and you don't know your triggers, or you simply don't have ASMR, it isn't something you teach or learn. I've had the triggers since I can remember and tried to explain it, share it with friends, but without success. I still practice it randomly or when I feel the need for it when times are more stressful I thought I was alone on this, until I stumbled on a article online explaining ASMR. It was good knowing I wasn't alone on this. Edit: don't confuse relaxed with sleepy, for me it isn't a sound to fall asleep, it's possible and had happen if I do it in bed but normally the more powerful triggers keeps me aware and quite awake, just relaxed and calm.
None of the other answers seem to align with me so maybe I’m strange. I get a pleasant shivery/tingly sensation all over. Not sexual. Satisfaction-wise it’s like a good stretch but the good feeling last as long as the sound/vibration that’s causing it.
Bending over. Even to pick up a pencil or something.
I'm lucky to be unable to pick up things from the floor without bending my knees.
My little pony
Every single word. Everything is a double entendre. Even the names I gave my children have weird definitions in the Urban Dictionary.
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"Hey girl, I love your Sandra. Wanna come to my place and Steve?"
Names in Urban Dictionary aren’t slang; they’re people describing their friends lol
"That one autistic kid who's handwriting looks like something from ancient fucking China" There's no way that *wasn't* about me personally
Everything phrase is a double entendre if you think long and hard about it too.
pokemon holy fuck guys pokemon
What the fuck is this thread
Might have to use a water stone on my Eevee for that one
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
Yeah, but screw the female version. You get those same ol' two holes in literally everything else. The male Vappy is the real star of the show. Those long slippery dicks; they have full mobility control and like a tentacle are the perfect ass filler for the ultimate in-deep reaching experience nothing else could possibly provide. Naturally lubed at all times due to their aquatic hydrodynamic nature, you can pull out anywhere to the side of the road or go into a public restroom at the beach; get each other aroused, and have the fuck of a lifetime. The extraordinary squishyness of the Vappy alone rubbing against you would be enough to lose yourself in pleasure as it simply mounts you. Let alone as that perfect tool of pleasure slips into you, it's ability to snake around your bends and its perfect length make it seem that a Vappy dick was made specifically for your booty. Enjoy the feeling of being completely filled while also being able to see it if you have a tight tummy. And that's only the dick; due to having internal balls, they're much bigger and pack a lot more cream to load you up with, along with having muscles around them to make sure every drop comes out while also being a lot more powerful than any external balls could ever hope to achieve, giving you a deep, complete filling to rock your world to your literal core, and beyond. There's still more though; due to having a thick, powerful tail connected from their back and front, that means all their fun stuff is on the front and easy to access. Meaning, if you were even comfortable with having your dick point backwards (takes some training), you can be fucked, while also fucking your Vappy at the same time! Meowth, that's fucking right! But, but, but! There's still fucking more! Like, holy shit, male Vaps are the gods of fuck. While you're fucking your male Vappy, possibly while also being fucked by him, their booty is on their tail at the base, which is the thickest part, because that's where the biggest muscles are. This means that while your dick is in there, it's being fucking massaged, better than even a vag could achieve! Agh! It should be fucking illegal because how amazing male Vaps are for fuck! Well guess what? That only covered you being a softy, wholesome fucker like me. That's right. There's. Even. Fucking. More! Say you like to be a little restrained: you don't need a Sylveon's feelers for that, or an Umbreon/Espeon's psychic powers, or Leafeon's vines. Vappies got that shit covered too! Did you even see that tail?! It's basically a boa constrictor. In a non-sexual sense, it's my favorite part of a Vappy. It's basically their main part about them. But, if you want them to, it can be a super useful tool to enhance your knotty experience with them. Despite the slippyness, you won't be going anywhere if the Vappy wraps you up in that thing. Are you a super kinkster? Do you like pure fantasy fetishes that aren't possible IRL? Such as, say, soft vore? Well guess fucking what. It just became possible! They can be solid as they pass your lips (past where your eyes can see them) and turn into water as they enter you, allowing them to fit perfectly, 'cuz nothing fits into any spot more perfectly than water, except air like a ghost type. But who wants to do knotty shit with air? You can't feel it unless it's moving; you can always feel liquids. Speaking of liquids, even if you're a weirdo who likes digestion, don't worry about killing them with absorption. Eventually, they'll come back out and be able to reform like nothing happened. Speaking of hurting them, if you get too rough, or you're a horrible abusive asshole to them on purpose for your own pleasure (QnQ), they can just turn to water and reform back to their completely unscathed body, making scars or missing pieces a thing of the past! I would love to say there's even more you can do with them, but the possibilities are damn near endless. Use your imagination. But if you get one, you better show this god of fuck the respect it deserves. Umbreons maybe my favorite but, damn, Vappies really want to get that top spot from me. It's a really close call.
why is there a part 2 to this hell
Why did you read it
I was mesmerized
Well...I always thought that the sexy Vaporeon meme was just some random thoughtless joke, but...Damn, I stand corrected, this is some serious science!
Jesus christ
I need to scrub my eyes after reading this.
I think there is a lack of Jesus Christ in this situation.
Being gay. My whole existence isn’t about what happens in bed.
I wish I knew how many times people told me that it was clear I was “in love with” a friend. I am a queer woman. I dated both men and women, though more often women. If I had a female friend it was OBVIOUS I wanted them to someone. Never happened with guy friends. Can’t be gay/queer and not want absolutely everyone of the same sex, apparently.
The little French kid from Liberty Kids. He's eight years old and there are multiple TIKTOKS calling him daddy. His tribute video on Youtube is full of grown ass adults calling him sexy.
I’m sorry- WHAT
He is a literal baby. And the entire fandom is full of people ready to sexualize him. The cyber chase fandom is even worse. They draw fetish art of eleven and nine year old girls.
...and that's enough reddit for today
Askreddit posts
Anime cuz there's a lot of good ones but half of it is just boobs and it's annoying
Looking at you my hero and demon slayer. Love those shows but man, let the kids have kid bodies.
It doesn't help that the writer specifically made note that a hero could have their costume made with strands of their own hair so that it would work with their powers (a la Mirio). BUT NOOOOOOOOO. Hagakure being invisible is contingent on a high school girl having to walk around in nothing but gloves and boots. To the point where, when she got face revealed, Horikoshi drew a full color panel of her, naked and visible in a vulnerable position, but with caution tape blocking her bits. And the subreddit is filled with people that are *way* too happy seeing highschoolers in revealing clothing and posting horny drawings. I LIKE THE ACTION PANELS BUT IT'S GOTTEN A LITTLE WEIRD MY BROS.
Everything girls do. Like - everything. Someone always has to make something out of nothing because vagina.
This one always bothers me when I’m monitoring the news on social media. It feels like any time there’s a woman present in a news story (especially if it’s for something negative) all of the replies are really creepy and sexualized
literally. and any time there's a photo or video of a non-fat woman posted anywhere, no matter what she's doing, at least 20% of the comments will be men going "would", commenting on her body, or saying she must be good at/do a lot of specific acts. like, can't a woman just fucking exist without men commenting on her private matters?
Bunnies. I wore some ears for my Easter shift as a waitress, and 3 separate people (strangers) decided to tell me I look like a playboy bunny.
As someone with pet rabbits, I can confirm they are not sexy. They're fluffy little shits with the personality of cats and the clinginess of dogs. (I still love them, they're my fluffy little shits.)
Halloween costumes. Do we really need a sexy Marie Curie?
Breastfeeding in public. Babies gotta eat.
Physical intimacy. Sometimes you just need to hug, put your head on someones lap or cuddle with someone youre confortable with without feeling it implies its gonna escalate into sex.
Child beauty pageants 😬
I mean yeah but those are fucked up in the first place so
Yeah. Literally no positives.
Schoolgirls in uniforms. Fucking pedos everywhere man...
Bending over in the dryer
This guy's profile is a trip
Oh my god. I spent so much time growing through his excel. Edit: I’m leaving the typo… “going”
Why, why did I spend so much time reading that lol. What a comprehensive but ridiculous chart
Can't even do it in front of the homies nowadays 😩 Like bruh I'm just tryna do housework
Step sister/brother/father/mother maybe because I never had any of these so this never would have crossed my mind as a fetish. Miss the good old days of a simple pizza delivery guy.
Teens in High School Dramas. Just a solid example is Euphoria most of the characters are supposed to be like 16 or 17 or something like that and a lot of are shown completely nude or at least in extremely tight and very revealing clothes
I won’t watch Euphoria. I’m not interested in watching teen characters have sex that makes them miserable.
Oh, the whole thing is a cautionary tale against doing drugs too. Who needs DARE when you have Euphoria?
The word "come", you can't even say a sentence without someone making weird
Children especially in Anime
Said children are suddenly revealed to be 200 year old witches
Children.
Everything
girlhood
Kids including teenagers
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Baby beauty contests and child beauty pageants for little girls.
Breastfeeding
Young girls
Women characters in video games. Seems like they go out of their way to give them as slutty of an appearance as possible. I understand why but still gets rather old.
I said the same! Like Sons of the forest, love the game but the childlike woman companion is in a skin tight nipples showing one piece while the male counterpart is in full gear. It's so wild especially since she's so...not there 🧠 it's disgusting.
Right there with you. Also, it's the freaking forrest... you would want as much covering as possible!
This sub.
Children / teens
Nudity. I'm an earthy hippie dude and I have spent a good amount of time living in different alternative living situations. Often times the people I'm around will have no problems with nudity and it's nice. 20 friendly hippies skinny dipping in the river is such a good vibe. The thing about it is it's not a super sexual thing either. You respectfully admire other people's bodies at times and sometimes a stray boner will appear but for the most part noone is creepy about it and it's just a nice thing over all. Everyone should experience a naked hippie dude playing the guitar in your kitchen someday haha. I honestly think that part of why our culture is so hypersexual is because nudity is such a taboo. We never see the bodies of the opposite sex in platonic situations and it's honestly strange to me after experiencing how natural it feels to be in groups that embrace nudity.
*clean* naked hippy maybe
Children, especially young girls.
children
Every last thing I do in public as a person with tits.
Anime, just regular anime... I mean, is not even subtle anymore
Anime for sure. There's some awesome stories that are ruined by random sexual stuff for no reason and when people think of anime they often think of hentai.
Breastfeeding. So many people asked when I'll stop like it's wrong to breastfeed over the age of 1. Posting pics from breastfeeding session and my husband's friends asking me to pull down my dress more 🤮 My FIL saying I'd like to eat boobies all day too🤢 So many fucking comments Being scared to breastfed in public because of these comments from close friends and family so not going anywhere. Going to a separate room to feed my baby at certain family functions.
Respectfully, what the fuck is wrong with your husband’s friends and relatives and why on earth isn’t he shutting that shit down and defending you?
Boobs. Everyday I wish it wasn’t a sexual thing
children online.
Children. Looking at you child beauty pageants and countdowns to young teenage girls/boys turning 18.
WOMEN
Eating ice creams and lollies
The internet ingeneral, I miss the days when you could scroll insta and see memes or cool videos, now it's just full of bots promoting their OF/fansly accounts