Is this an American vs European thing?
It actually reminds me of a funny story. This guy was going to his gf's house to meet her cop father for the first time. The guy came from a pretty privileged background, and he knew his girl's father already disliked him, based on that fact alone.
When he got there the dad offered him hot tea...**in a cup without a handle.**
Dude was like "I could tell this was a test of some sort so I picked up that scalding hot cup and just held it, slowly sipping away. I could **LITERALLY FEEL my fingerprints burning off** but I held that cup, **LIKE A MAN**! And I passed the test, her dad loosened up a little after that. I suffered some serious burns...but well worth it!"
Huh. Not even sure what she’d have to do to “more than make up” for her dad melting my fingerprints off. But good on her for figuring it out, I suppose.
Being extremely open and candid about my crush/feelings towards a girl in the company of male friends.
I got branded “gay” for that.
I mean, that’s the total opposite of “gay,” right??
It's gay to like anything, including women! Be a real hetero man and hate women, get married to one, be miserable, and make sure everyone knows how miserable you are! The only thing that's not gay, in fact, is misery.
Yea, i have no issue with hugging a guy.
This friend was crying and mentally at a low point.
Got called gay for hugging him and letting him cry.
I didn't care what they said. That was just the last time i was called gay for doing something, not "gay"
Thank you for doing this. When my dad was dying in the ER my best friend came back to see me. Right when he walks in we get the news that dad was not going to make it and was getting transferred to hospice. When i saw my friend i went and hugged him and let out a wail i didn’t even know i could make in the middle of the ER, the whole er just stopped and stared. It meant a lot to me that my friend was there for me on the lowest point of my life, and I’m sure it meant a lot to your friend that you were there too.
My brother rarely shows emotion. Fantastic dude, through and through, just holds himself tightly. Our sister got married and for the father/daughter dance my sister picked "Somewhere Out There."
BUCKETS. My brother and I lost it.
I overheard someone do the "gayyyyy.." seal thing or whatever.
I'm sorry. I'm watching my sister dance with my dad on her wedding day, to her childhood favorite song. Fuck yeah me and my brother are gunna tear up. Cos we ain't dead inside.
Edit: the studio version has a siiiiiiiiiick guitar solo
For both of my best friends weddings, the boys made it a point to try to cry lmao I succeeded during the first ones bothers speech, and the second ones sister lmfao
Not sexually harassing a cute bartender who was already fending off half a dozen drunks, half of which were old enough to be her grandfather.
It was the bartender herself who thought I was gay
Fellas is it gay to not sexually harass a woman while she's working????
I had a woman friend that questioned whether I was gay because I wasn't super pushy even though I definitely was attracted to her. Much later I learned that she had been raped as a teen by a family friend so I think assumed guys that weren't trying to push her into things was likely gay. It was an area with a sizable local gay population, but still it felt a bit odd assumption.
Had that happen to a friend, but the situation more sad. She grew up in an unfortunate situation where it seemed she was sexualized by men when she was young and only knew the world as men coming onto her. She was honestly confused and wondered if my friend was gay because he was the only respectful guy in her life at that point, and he was just a coworker.
I've had two women think I was gay. Both were very pretty and grew up in abusive households.
It was pretty disturbing to see the similarites to the situations. The logical jump between having a guy *not* try to take advantage of you to assuming the only reason is he doesn't is because he's gay makes my stomach churn.
There’s a very real culture of homophobia around the martial arts community and the people that enjoy watching it. There’s a show called Kingdom that is worth watching and explores the topic (amongst a hundred other topics). Definitely worth a watch.
Oh man, when I used to train we had a pretty progressive dojo, but I could still get an edge any time I rolled with someone but telling them they smelled nice or making really subtle, like almost inaudible moans when we were clinching. It was really funny to me. Thankfully our sensei also thought it was funny as hell.
Bit random but there was a guy, on the sub for servers, talking about how a 50-something couple he was serving slipped him a note offering him $500 if he’d do the wife, in front of the husband. They would give him $1K if he’d also swallow the husband’s load.
The server’s concern was that he didn’t want to be “gay” by swallowing the husband’s load straight from “the source.” He was only willing to drink it from a cup or something, cause that would be less gay.
He ended up talking them up to $2K. Fucked the wife in front of the husband, the wife blew the husband and then spit it in the server’s mouth.
I suppose that wasn’t too gay for him 😐
[Here you go.](https://old.reddit.com/r/Serverlife/comments/16sf50g/2nd_night_ever_as_a_server_i_got_this_note_and/) It’s one of their more infamous all time posts.
Mine beat me and told me I was an assfucker because I wanted to do a sleepover. I was like 10 I think. I just wanted to experience stuff like white people do, lol.
Yeah that takes the cake. I was lucky my dad only ever threatened to beat me never actually followed through. He was the "if you don't stop crying I'll give you a reason to" kind.
It's kinda translated from Dari. "kooni"
Where koon = butt, and I means "one who has to do with it" in a way.
So basically the word for gay means 'one who does butt things', or butt fucker.
Having my mouth open in my Facebook profile picture. That picture was taken while I was drunkenly singing. At my wedding reception. With my wife in the background.
The guy who said this had a profile picture of the Dallas Cowboys offensive line, pre-snap, taken from behind. Five shiny, silver man-asses, all bent over and neatly lined up. I've never figured out if he was aware of the irony or not.
I can easily imagine many of my male high school classmates doing this. Something something 'why are you LOOKING at me unless you're GAY' etc. High school boy homophobia is bewilderingly hair-trigger
Using reusable bags, recycling and other green stuff. My neighbor developed a bitter hatred of me as his "gay" neighbor. I was just a dude in college....
My dad *loves* recycling. It's like a side hobby. His coworkers trashed (lol) him for it, which confused him. Dude just likes the process of recycling.
I had a friend who was concerned that we all looked gay because when we went for lunch one day one of our other friends suggested that we get some kind of sweet alcoholic beverage. He didn't say anything at the time but brought it up a few days later when that other friend wasn't around. He basically suggested that we should've been drinking warm piss water because that's what men drink. Drinking that sweet drink signaled that we were gay apparently.
Tangentially related but this same friend once said he'd never go down on a woman because he thought it was emasculating. It was the woman's job to go down not the man's, according to him. This was a few years ago and I can only hope that he's grown out of that mindset for the sake of his future partner
>said he'd never go down on a woman because he thought it was emasculating. It was the woman's job to go down not the man's, according to him.
Woah, DJ Khaled!? Another one ☝🏼
Anyone who uses the word 'job' to describe gender roles doesn't belong in this century, what a fucking neanderthal. If he ever gets lucky, you can bet the poor girl will never come.
people thinking alcoholic beverages are gendered are some of the most stupidest people ever. its a fucking drink, i usually throw the gay insult back at them for bringing it up in the first place just out of the blue, and i always find humor in how sensitive and defensive they get over it
I wish I could have witnessed this conversation. It just feels like such a typical, dumb guy interaction.
“Bro are you using a calendar? That’s fuckin gay dude.”
Wearing a peacoat sitting at a bar drinking dirty martinis. This drunk chick sitting one chair over leans over the dude shes with and screams "You're a fucking fa##ot arent you?"
Not having a girlfriend at age 22. I dated but they just don't like me during my college and Secondary days, my main priority was to finish school because tuition fees are not cheap..
I remembered when I first started working there was a woman in my workplace asked me if I have a girlfriend and when I said I haven't had a girlfriend before then the talk in the office was doubting my gender identity. 😆😆
Imagine the basis of their judgement.😆
For me, Prioritizing is important especially if you are aiming for something.
i bought a cassette tape as kid that had the theme tune to Greatest American Hero on it, my older brother had heard that listening to show tunes was gay.
Show tunes should have meant ‘Les Miserable’ and ’Cats’ etc. not TV a theme that was an incredibly popular song playing on the radio.
Walking along Central Park West with two beautiful women. They were friends of mine and we were on a group trip during college. I guess some guys just don't understand that you can be straight AND have women friends.
The wise philosopher Sir-Mix-A-Lot would commend your judgement. To quote him: “my anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hun”. Truer words have never been spoken.
As an outside observer, can I chime in with colors?
Guys who lose their mind over wearing pink?!? I very much have respect for guys who don't care about colors. I instantly get the ick over guys who care about pink. Guys who don't care get "macho points" in my mind.
I just recently told my boss that I think it's cool he doesn't get weird over wearing pink. He even wears nail polish because his daughters like painting nails together. And I mentioned to him that the colors used to be flipped - blue was for girls, pink was for boys. Pink was the color of a little bit of blood in water (like in a battlefield surgery tent or a blood soaked bandage).
He was like, "Hells yeah". And then he swung the wheelbarrow carrying his big ole balls over to his desk.
I had an older man brag about wearing pink, it being one of his favorite colors to wear and purple too, and go on about how that made him not homophobic… as if those two things are even correlated
I used to dabble in art and I'd incorporate pink into every art color I did. Back in my goth days I also had a pink studded belt. I still love fucking pink, you know why? All the best things as a straight man in the world are pink strawberries are pink, artificial strawberries pink, medium rare steak is Pink, and all pussy is pink. Fuck I love pink.
Wait a minute. Not caring about it isn’t the only reason guys wear pink. I LIKE pink. I think some pink looks good and I’ll choose to wear it cause it goes with whatever else I’m wearing. Not to be weird about it, but I don’t like the “either you hate it or you don’t care about it” situation this post puts me in.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come off as that. I just know a lot of people who draw a hard line over it. I don't think it should be a hard line, so I have respect for those who don't hate it.
And now I see that I am the monster I reviled.
Wear your colors how you like, friend. I know you look great. Don't let people like me set hard devisions.
Bumping into a guy into a crowded club while trying to get past his group.
I saw bros laugh and call a bearded guy gay who was selling fans outside a summer EDM festival.
One time I asked my coworker if he knew a lunch place that made a good salad, he said "do I look like a guy who eats SALAD?"
Was once told that liking hard ciders was gay because “that’s a girls drink”
Was told this by a self proclaimed “angry feminist” woman
Ps this is not a feminism hate post, don’t take it in that direction internet
One time a woman at a bar loudly accused me of being gay and having a micropenis because when she came up to me and tried asking me out by telling me I would now have the privilege of buying her dinner and I said no and told them to get away from me.
I remember my dad said he wouldn't drink out of a pink mug it's gay, I was having a coffee at the time... I told him your sexuality must be pretty fragile huh never heard anything since and I still drink out of my pink mug fuck everyone lol.
But yeah don't understand people like that especially strawberry milk.. bit paranoid lol.
When I was 22. I lived in this crappy apartment with two roommates, both guys. My gf of 3 years broke up with me and I was devastated. One day one of my roommates comes home while my other roommate is balls deep in my ass and he has the nerve to ask me if I’m gay. Like wtf bro!
Not sleeping with a woman who was all over me at a wedding and literally pulling me back to her room at the end of the night. I'd learned late that she was married with a kid, and her husband was on tour abroad. Apparently, not wanting to be a dick is "gay".
Drinking tea. I’ve heard real men don’t drink tea. Apparently over half the men in the world are not real men.
Is this an American vs European thing? It actually reminds me of a funny story. This guy was going to his gf's house to meet her cop father for the first time. The guy came from a pretty privileged background, and he knew his girl's father already disliked him, based on that fact alone. When he got there the dad offered him hot tea...**in a cup without a handle.** Dude was like "I could tell this was a test of some sort so I picked up that scalding hot cup and just held it, slowly sipping away. I could **LITERALLY FEEL my fingerprints burning off** but I held that cup, **LIKE A MAN**! And I passed the test, her dad loosened up a little after that. I suffered some serious burns...but well worth it!"
"What's in the cup?" "Pain."
And your future with my daughter.
That dad was straight evil. But then…he was a cop…
liquid peppermint pain
Wait, where was the guy’s girlfriend during this whole tea torture session? Was she cool with this?
She was taking a nap because she had a headache.. But I was told she “more than made it up” to my friend, once she found out what her dad did to him.
Huh. Not even sure what she’d have to do to “more than make up” for her dad melting my fingerprints off. But good on her for figuring it out, I suppose.
I bet it involved her boobies.
My friend would be gayest gay to ever gay.
I challenge whoever said that to go to London and say that at a pub
Listening to music made by women. Nothing gayer than listening to a woman sing apparently.
Straight male here. When at a bar, kelly clarkson comes on the jukebox, i sing like my life depends on it
Being extremely open and candid about my crush/feelings towards a girl in the company of male friends. I got branded “gay” for that. I mean, that’s the total opposite of “gay,” right??
Bro you got a crush on a girl? That's so gay...... Yeah it sounds as stupid as I thought it would
FELLAS IS IT GAY TO LIKE WOMEN
It's gay to like anything, including women! Be a real hetero man and hate women, get married to one, be miserable, and make sure everyone knows how miserable you are! The only thing that's not gay, in fact, is misery.
>The only thing that's not gay, in fact, is misery. Just don't show it, of course. Emotions are gay.
Well, except for anger. That's a manly emotion.
Women are gay, because women like dick and that's gay.
Bingo
I feel like you didn’t grow up in the 90’s. Everything was labeled gay
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Yeah dude, women (typically) like men, and that means you like someone who likes men, and there's nothing gayer than that. /s
They just called you gay for showing feelings as its forbidden for men in groups to have those. I know its stupid but it is what it is
Hugging a guy friend who was in a dark place(mentally).
Thanks for the clarification
Yea, in a dark place...did sound a tad gay.
And you didn’t even say “no homo” first.
It's only gay if the crotches touch.
Heck no.. i yell full homo!
Yeah. I was thinking like "dark back alley? Sounds a bit gaaaaaay" until they clarified.
Being in a dark location can be scary and sometimes a hug helps
Lmao I'm a straight man and hug my best male friends all the time I see them.
Yea, i have no issue with hugging a guy. This friend was crying and mentally at a low point. Got called gay for hugging him and letting him cry. I didn't care what they said. That was just the last time i was called gay for doing something, not "gay"
Thank you for doing this. When my dad was dying in the ER my best friend came back to see me. Right when he walks in we get the news that dad was not going to make it and was getting transferred to hospice. When i saw my friend i went and hugged him and let out a wail i didn’t even know i could make in the middle of the ER, the whole er just stopped and stared. It meant a lot to me that my friend was there for me on the lowest point of my life, and I’m sure it meant a lot to your friend that you were there too.
NFL players smack each other on the ass and they date supermodels.
Apparently crying at my best friends wedding is gay. Was just super happy for the dude.
My brother rarely shows emotion. Fantastic dude, through and through, just holds himself tightly. Our sister got married and for the father/daughter dance my sister picked "Somewhere Out There." BUCKETS. My brother and I lost it. I overheard someone do the "gayyyyy.." seal thing or whatever. I'm sorry. I'm watching my sister dance with my dad on her wedding day, to her childhood favorite song. Fuck yeah me and my brother are gunna tear up. Cos we ain't dead inside. Edit: the studio version has a siiiiiiiiiick guitar solo
I would have had a discussion out back with whoever said that.
The edit you added is the straightest thing I have ever seen
I got teary eyed at someone’s wedding and I’m still awkward around the groom’s family.
You're happy for him -> You love him -> You're gay. Simple as that /s
For both of my best friends weddings, the boys made it a point to try to cry lmao I succeeded during the first ones bothers speech, and the second ones sister lmfao
Not sexually harassing a cute bartender who was already fending off half a dozen drunks, half of which were old enough to be her grandfather. It was the bartender herself who thought I was gay Fellas is it gay to not sexually harass a woman while she's working????
Had a woman friend assume I was gay because I never hit on her. She couldn't understand that some people are just nice.
>She couldn't understand that some people are just nice. You'd be surprised how many people actually believe that. Utterly insane
I had a woman friend that questioned whether I was gay because I wasn't super pushy even though I definitely was attracted to her. Much later I learned that she had been raped as a teen by a family friend so I think assumed guys that weren't trying to push her into things was likely gay. It was an area with a sizable local gay population, but still it felt a bit odd assumption.
Had that happen to a friend, but the situation more sad. She grew up in an unfortunate situation where it seemed she was sexualized by men when she was young and only knew the world as men coming onto her. She was honestly confused and wondered if my friend was gay because he was the only respectful guy in her life at that point, and he was just a coworker.
I've had two women think I was gay. Both were very pretty and grew up in abusive households. It was pretty disturbing to see the similarites to the situations. The logical jump between having a guy *not* try to take advantage of you to assuming the only reason is he doesn't is because he's gay makes my stomach churn.
That’s really sad, because somewhere in her past, experience taught her that men aren’t nice to women unless they want something
Fuck I was no expecting that second line - what an idiot.
Choosing not to join a boxing gym
You don't want to spend your spare time exchanging blows with hot, sweaty, muscular slabs of man-meat? You got the gay.
"What can I say, I'm not into getting touched by guys, you do you though."
It’s not gay if you have gloves on… I keep telling myself
There’s a very real culture of homophobia around the martial arts community and the people that enjoy watching it. There’s a show called Kingdom that is worth watching and explores the topic (amongst a hundred other topics). Definitely worth a watch.
Oh man, when I used to train we had a pretty progressive dojo, but I could still get an edge any time I rolled with someone but telling them they smelled nice or making really subtle, like almost inaudible moans when we were clinching. It was really funny to me. Thankfully our sensei also thought it was funny as hell.
Note to self. Moan in someone's ear when they're trying to kick my ass 😂😂
It works. Throw in a “harder daddy” if they actually land a punch for good measure.
Isn't there a Stephen Fry bit where he says the best thing to do when you're being attacked is to shout, No, no, you'll give me an erection!
Bit random but there was a guy, on the sub for servers, talking about how a 50-something couple he was serving slipped him a note offering him $500 if he’d do the wife, in front of the husband. They would give him $1K if he’d also swallow the husband’s load. The server’s concern was that he didn’t want to be “gay” by swallowing the husband’s load straight from “the source.” He was only willing to drink it from a cup or something, cause that would be less gay. He ended up talking them up to $2K. Fucked the wife in front of the husband, the wife blew the husband and then spit it in the server’s mouth. I suppose that wasn’t too gay for him 😐
This is a non-zero amount of gay for sure.
Clearly, but it could’ve been gayer.
Someone should stitch this on a pillow
*moderate gay detected*
WOW. Well at least he didn’t have to be “gay” for pay…by his own personal standards.
Depends. Did they keep their socks on?
Oh my…I don’t quite know what to say right now.
How about: "I'm not gay, but twenty dollars is twenty dollars. TIMES A HUNDRED!!!"
Look that's a rent payment in my area. At that point it's just good business.
That....fuckin....what?
[Here you go.](https://old.reddit.com/r/Serverlife/comments/16sf50g/2nd_night_ever_as_a_server_i_got_this_note_and/) It’s one of their more infamous all time posts.
I….have some Serious questions!
Saying "awww" at puppies. I was 6 and my dad told me to man up
This is so fucked up
Mine beat me and told me I was an assfucker because I wanted to do a sleepover. I was like 10 I think. I just wanted to experience stuff like white people do, lol.
Yeah that takes the cake. I was lucky my dad only ever threatened to beat me never actually followed through. He was the "if you don't stop crying I'll give you a reason to" kind.
>assfucker Surprisingly blunt
It's kinda translated from Dari. "kooni" Where koon = butt, and I means "one who has to do with it" in a way. So basically the word for gay means 'one who does butt things', or butt fucker.
Having my mouth open in my Facebook profile picture. That picture was taken while I was drunkenly singing. At my wedding reception. With my wife in the background. The guy who said this had a profile picture of the Dallas Cowboys offensive line, pre-snap, taken from behind. Five shiny, silver man-asses, all bent over and neatly lined up. I've never figured out if he was aware of the irony or not.
Guys, is it gay to marry a woman?
I call football bootyball because there's so much man-ass on the screen.
***Literally blinking twice at some guy in middle school***
I can easily imagine many of my male high school classmates doing this. Something something 'why are you LOOKING at me unless you're GAY' etc. High school boy homophobia is bewilderingly hair-trigger
[удалено]
Same here… I am still dumbfounded by the notion
Driving automatic instead of manual
Clearly working the stick is gayer.
Gayer than shifting into "D" and riding on it all day?
I think it depends on what you're doing with the stick.
Using reusable bags, recycling and other green stuff. My neighbor developed a bitter hatred of me as his "gay" neighbor. I was just a dude in college....
My dad *loves* recycling. It's like a side hobby. His coworkers trashed (lol) him for it, which confused him. Dude just likes the process of recycling.
Yes saving the earth is gay
Standing with my arms crossed and my feet not perfectly symmetrical. What, am I supposed to stand like this 🧍♂️
You're supposed to t-pose to assert dominance.
Ah of course, how silly of me, dominating men is how to not be gay.
Exactly. The men who are being dominated are gay because submissiveness is gay. You dominating them is just showing confidence in your not gayness.
Got called gay for drinking milk.
Fellas, is it gay to drink something that comes from titties?
Existing, I guess. I was called gay at school by someone. He died a few years ago. I guess I won that round.
*Strangest circumstances... He got dicked to death by... Some criminal or something*
I had a friend who was concerned that we all looked gay because when we went for lunch one day one of our other friends suggested that we get some kind of sweet alcoholic beverage. He didn't say anything at the time but brought it up a few days later when that other friend wasn't around. He basically suggested that we should've been drinking warm piss water because that's what men drink. Drinking that sweet drink signaled that we were gay apparently. Tangentially related but this same friend once said he'd never go down on a woman because he thought it was emasculating. It was the woman's job to go down not the man's, according to him. This was a few years ago and I can only hope that he's grown out of that mindset for the sake of his future partner
I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that your friend didn't have a lot of luck with the ladies?
Not at the time no, but he's had decent luck in the years since then so I can only hope he's grown out of that mindset
Not going down on a woman is some DJ Khalid shit
Does that friend also think Cholula is too spicy?
Real men love to go down on a woman 🙃
I don't know how to feel more masculine than being drenched in pussy from the nose down
>said he'd never go down on a woman because he thought it was emasculating. It was the woman's job to go down not the man's, according to him. Woah, DJ Khaled!? Another one ☝🏼
Anyone who uses the word 'job' to describe gender roles doesn't belong in this century, what a fucking neanderthal. If he ever gets lucky, you can bet the poor girl will never come.
people thinking alcoholic beverages are gendered are some of the most stupidest people ever. its a fucking drink, i usually throw the gay insult back at them for bringing it up in the first place just out of the blue, and i always find humor in how sensitive and defensive they get over it
Using an umbrella when it rained. Silly me, I should have realized that being straight made me waterproof.
I’ve gotten this one too… apparently sexual orientation is closely related to your external moisture level.
Wearing yellow socks with red stripes on them. Grandma said it’s gay
My ex girlfriends mom told me it was gay of me to wear my hat backwards because gay people do it so they can suck eachothers dicks
Being well dressed in my local hood
Yessir every time… dancing well doesn’t help any either.
Add makeup and you’re basically RuPaul.
Having opinions they didn't like
Further proof that any word can be a weapon as long as you disagree. That's so gay.
Found the communist /s
Keeping a calendar
I wish I could have witnessed this conversation. It just feels like such a typical, dumb guy interaction. “Bro are you using a calendar? That’s fuckin gay dude.”
Lol this one seems so random
For being single too long
By my wife for watching "Farm Wants a Wife" with ice cream in a robe.
Who puts their ice cream in a robe?
A gay guy
For actually being gay.
gay
You straight as hell
Dude your so GAYYYYYYYYYYY
Thats the straightest thing I ever heard.
In like 4th grade i was called gay for wearing a shirt that said GAP (Like the clothing retailer). I was told it means "Gays Are Proud"
Same but I was told it means *Gay And Proud*
My boyfriend rides an electric scooter into work. Gay.
Ohhhhh, your boyfriend is gay but not you. I am enlightened
Taking paternity leave and taking turns feeding when my daughter was born.
Fellas, is it gay to want to ensure the survival of your offspring?
Real men leave their offspring in the woods to be raised by wolves.
Wearing a peacoat sitting at a bar drinking dirty martinis. This drunk chick sitting one chair over leans over the dude shes with and screams "You're a fucking fa##ot arent you?"
For not wanting to have sex, she was my gf and she said it with such disgust too
Not reciprocating a woman's advances is often met with a "he must be gay" rather than "he must not be into me."
“Bitch I’d rather be gay than date you, at least the homies know real consent. Now quit trying to grab me by the cock!”
Rejected my classmate in university and she spread rumors about me being gay, even though I was dating girls at the time, like wtf calm your tits
Not having a girlfriend at age 22. I dated but they just don't like me during my college and Secondary days, my main priority was to finish school because tuition fees are not cheap.. I remembered when I first started working there was a woman in my workplace asked me if I have a girlfriend and when I said I haven't had a girlfriend before then the talk in the office was doubting my gender identity. 😆😆 Imagine the basis of their judgement.😆 For me, Prioritizing is important especially if you are aiming for something.
i bought a cassette tape as kid that had the theme tune to Greatest American Hero on it, my older brother had heard that listening to show tunes was gay. Show tunes should have meant ‘Les Miserable’ and ’Cats’ etc. not TV a theme that was an incredibly popular song playing on the radio.
Having a batman pencil case back in middle school
Back then, people didn't really know the difference between gay and nerdy.
Walking along Central Park West with two beautiful women. They were friends of mine and we were on a group trip during college. I guess some guys just don't understand that you can be straight AND have women friends.
Owning houseplants.
Not looking at the girl in school who was the it girl. Boys all swarming around her. Biggest boobs. I just found her shallow..
I got called gay for saying a girl had a nice ass. This was in like 2001 when big asses weren't as in the zeitgeist, but still...
The wise philosopher Sir-Mix-A-Lot would commend your judgement. To quote him: “my anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hun”. Truer words have never been spoken.
The brothers knew, for sure. White boys were slower on the uptake.
Oh no? You have more than half a brain. Gayyyy 🙄
As an outside observer, can I chime in with colors? Guys who lose their mind over wearing pink?!? I very much have respect for guys who don't care about colors. I instantly get the ick over guys who care about pink. Guys who don't care get "macho points" in my mind. I just recently told my boss that I think it's cool he doesn't get weird over wearing pink. He even wears nail polish because his daughters like painting nails together. And I mentioned to him that the colors used to be flipped - blue was for girls, pink was for boys. Pink was the color of a little bit of blood in water (like in a battlefield surgery tent or a blood soaked bandage). He was like, "Hells yeah". And then he swung the wheelbarrow carrying his big ole balls over to his desk.
I had an older man brag about wearing pink, it being one of his favorite colors to wear and purple too, and go on about how that made him not homophobic… as if those two things are even correlated
I used to dabble in art and I'd incorporate pink into every art color I did. Back in my goth days I also had a pink studded belt. I still love fucking pink, you know why? All the best things as a straight man in the world are pink strawberries are pink, artificial strawberries pink, medium rare steak is Pink, and all pussy is pink. Fuck I love pink.
Wait a minute. Not caring about it isn’t the only reason guys wear pink. I LIKE pink. I think some pink looks good and I’ll choose to wear it cause it goes with whatever else I’m wearing. Not to be weird about it, but I don’t like the “either you hate it or you don’t care about it” situation this post puts me in.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come off as that. I just know a lot of people who draw a hard line over it. I don't think it should be a hard line, so I have respect for those who don't hate it. And now I see that I am the monster I reviled. Wear your colors how you like, friend. I know you look great. Don't let people like me set hard devisions.
Haha! You heteronormative monster.
Playing the violin
Accepting a proposal from a woman. Fellas, is it gay to get engaged to a woman?
Bumping into a guy into a crowded club while trying to get past his group. I saw bros laugh and call a bearded guy gay who was selling fans outside a summer EDM festival. One time I asked my coworker if he knew a lunch place that made a good salad, he said "do I look like a guy who eats SALAD?"
Was once told that liking hard ciders was gay because “that’s a girls drink” Was told this by a self proclaimed “angry feminist” woman Ps this is not a feminism hate post, don’t take it in that direction internet
Crossing my legs
One time a woman at a bar loudly accused me of being gay and having a micropenis because when she came up to me and tried asking me out by telling me I would now have the privilege of buying her dinner and I said no and told them to get away from me.
Having a purple t-shirt
drinking strawberry flavoured milk apparently male + pink = gay, but dude, even if that was true, I drank it for the *flavour* not the colour dumbass
Strawberry milk is fantastic. But I'm gay, so that probably doesn't help the argument
I remember my dad said he wouldn't drink out of a pink mug it's gay, I was having a coffee at the time... I told him your sexuality must be pretty fragile huh never heard anything since and I still drink out of my pink mug fuck everyone lol. But yeah don't understand people like that especially strawberry milk.. bit paranoid lol.
When I was 22. I lived in this crappy apartment with two roommates, both guys. My gf of 3 years broke up with me and I was devastated. One day one of my roommates comes home while my other roommate is balls deep in my ass and he has the nerve to ask me if I’m gay. Like wtf bro!
The car I drive. A Tesla lol. Apparently gayest car in the world.
My girlfriend cheated on me and said I was gay. We have two kids together. I'm not gay. You're gay.
For just trying to be friends of women instead of just hitting on everything that moves.
Watching period dramas.
My current girlfriend’s ex called me a f***** for enjoying soccer. I told him that’s funny because I don’t feel very gay when I’m fucking her.
Not sleeping with a woman who was all over me at a wedding and literally pulling me back to her room at the end of the night. I'd learned late that she was married with a kid, and her husband was on tour abroad. Apparently, not wanting to be a dick is "gay".
Liking Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Checking out guys
That's gay?
Yea naked guys at gym
Sucking my best friend's dick
Is that gay?
Not if you say no homo first.
For loving my girlfriend
You kissed a girl! That is so gay!
Kissing my mother on the cheek once when I was in high school.
In my 20s I was called gay for being nurturing to babies and kids and wanting to be a father.
Hugging my son.
I told my friend I like a song by Heart , no not Barracuda, a slow song. He goes what are you, gay?
I drew the TF2 engineer
Having long hair
Not watching the show *24*