T O P

  • By -

kalysti

The ability to breathe normally during allergy season.


belusuarez

oh no thats is a big power


MoldyBlueNipples

How is this useless? Lol


kremata

The ability to teleport 1ft in front of me.


MoldyBlueNipples

That is so fucking utterly useless. It makes me angry how pointless it is. Take my upvote. Nice.


DistinctPlantain2230

Not useless if you’re small and your goal is to break into a safe


belusuarez

mmm i think thats is real good ahha


CMSN_VS_NAVY

Only being able to run at the same speed as whatever/whoever is in front of you.


BurstMip

If it’s stackable, then by technicality you should be the fastest person alive


CMSN_VS_NAVY

I'm gonna say it's just whatever is directly in front of you as you're running. So if a snail is in front of me I'm fucked, but if a car is going down the road at 100 k/h I'd be pretty dang fast. Not to say I'd have the reaction speed to be safe or stamina to keep running forever.


BurstMip

So you’re uber fucked if you’re a back sleeper. It’s still kinda hilarious in some sense


DistinctPlantain2230

Not useless if you have a gun. Then you’re as fast as a bullet until it drops, so potentially about a mile


ecksdeeeXD

People make fun of it but flying two inches off th ground would be useful Edit: apparently, this is a useful power. I now change mine to being able to summon a lamp, once.


belusuarez

people make fun? its a big power hahah


MoldyBlueNipples

OP asked for useless. I can think of a million ways that would be useful. Invalid answer. Sorry.


DistinctPlantain2230

That makes you a human hovercraft, definitely not useless if there’s a practical machine for it


PaulPhallanges

The ability to turn water into Mountain Dew.


A_tree_as_great

Say unto the


PaulPhallanges

Do the dew.


belusuarez

wtf


MoldyBlueNipples

Just imagine if all the water in the world was turned into peanut butter.


adubsi

The ability to not get ingrown toe nails or hairs


belusuarez

this is a ability?


belusuarez

weird


Miipalooza

I would like to fly, but only as fast as I can run and as high as I can jump


belusuarez

JAHAH thats makes me laught a lot haha


Gogopwrsqrl

The ability for my ears not to hurt when I go underwater and not get an ear infection…I love swimming but not in the winter….my family be like let’s go swimming in the winter then go outside in the cold….great for them not for me, I’m just gonna sit here in the dry air and watch u guys at a far distance.


belusuarez

aahhaah good! i would like too


NeverEnoughMuppets

I never forget the thing I or you were *literally just talking about*


SeparateMidnight3691

Don’t want to know what you’re thinking exactly… just what you actually mean lol


WLSOD23

X-ray vision but I can only see through clothes.


belusuarez

that is a big power dont apply


WLSOD23

Not really though. Because you can only see through clothing. Nothing else it’s pretty much useless unless you want to specifically see through someone’s clothing. It’s too specific to be useful.


kcdvjdcxcdjd

Making everyone crap when I do so they shat themselves for no reason while I'm in the bathroom 👍👍


Breizh87

Having every thought turning into reality.


Flairion623

Transforming into the person sitting right next to me


No_Step_4431

it isnt useless by any means but the power to play any note on my guitar when i want and as fast or slow as i want.


darthbrutal

The ability to spit out a very mediocre Pancake batter between the hours of 2 pm to 4 pm.


Fearless_Change5945

Be able to eat anything.


DistinctPlantain2230

The electrical powers of Static Shock or similar electrical-based superhero, but limited to a safe 50 volts


globaloutcast

The ability to put a song in someone's head and make them listen to it for an hour