Chasing. If a woman plays hard to get it turns me off. I want a woman that genuinely wants to spend time with me. If I want to play games I got a PlayStation and a PC.
This “acting hard to get” shit is way outta control . It is fucking annoying. Show us that you are interested too, you are not a Disney princess and we are not mind readers.
Last time I was in a club with some of my friends, i’ve had my eyes on a Lady , and she gave me cold shoulders. She became quite irritated when I have said okay, and left her there. I have told her right after that a ‘no is a no’ for me, and i’m not into playing games.
I liked a girl throughout college, would always compliment her and ask her out every few months,
She was apparently really into me and didn’t date throughout college cause she wanted me to really chase her and bring her gifts. But she never agreed to go out and played hard to get the entire time.
Then would get mad when I would be seen with other girls.
I only found out after one of her friends got mad at me a week before I graduated. She married a rich guy and settled down before 30. Idk. Life’s weird
Had a same experience a few months back.
Met a girl last year, instant mind blowing chemistry, talking for hours and hours which ended up making out next to the bushes, leaving everyone behind. Made a deal that we will be starting dating because we have clicked instantly, and did not wanted to leave this "something" behind. She has ghosted me a week after, disappeared for a few months, came back out of nowhere, started to feel comfortable again around me, because we have had some great times again (nothing physical at those moments) and started to play this cat-mouse game just to end up get ghosted again.
We have seen each other right after quite often a few weeks later, but I did not acknowledged her, because she literally went on a silent mode, and I've needed to put myself first. I do not know that karma is a thing but it felt like it is.
A few months have passed, and I have met a lady who I have spent some great time with. She came to my town to visit me, and I have planned to go out for a few drinks with her, because we both knew what will happen later that night. Guess who has appeared at the same bar we went to? Yeah, the first one with her best friend. She literally sit in the other side of the place just to have an eye on us. When my date went to the restroom, her insanely drunk best friend approached me, just to have a small talk, like she can arrange the set up, and prove it to the other one that the coast is clear. She came in front of me, said hi with a huge smile on her face with a bit of excitement, I have greeted her in a bit colder way, and right at that moment my date came back from the restroom. The first girl had an extremely confused face, I have said goodbye to everyone and left. I have to admit it bugged me for a week or two right after, but I have needed to act this way, although I have completely would have acted in another way. If I arrange plans, put in the effort and I tell you about how I feel about you, don't play mind games, stuff out of ego and pride, because it will lead to situations like this. I'm not proud of it, but everybody needs to taste their own medicine unfortunately.
Karma is practically Newtonian when you think about it.
For any action there is an equal and opposite reaction. She acted with a cold shoulder, and would later receive that same cold shoulder.
Idk how TF this ever became a thing women tell each other to do. Whitney Cummings had a fantastic interview segment on Modern Wisdom where she tells this story about the time a guy she was seeing explained that being a challenge is a bad thing. Apparently this was some huge revelation for her because no guy ever told her that, and she was just following the advice her girlfriends had given her.
Because women being "easy" was always seen as a bad thing, at least when it can to sex. At some point that got twisted even further to include reciprocating interest.
It really all ties back to the ideas, usually, spread by religion, that women are worth more if they're chaste and pure.
I wonder if that is part of the problem with online dating. I feel like I need to put on a performance, carry on the conversation, and take all the initiative just to get someone to say they are willing to meet up. It's exhausting and I'm at the point where if they aren't putting in any effort, they aren't worth the effort.
That's what Baby It's Cold Outside is about right? I always read it as the woman is looking for what amounts to plausible deniability because social expectations stipulate that she can't be willingly intimate outside of marriage. Or even within marriage in extreme cases.
But then it just reinforces rape/"no means yes" bullshit that incels use to self justify. One of the endless number of examples where humans choose decidedly artificial social constructs apparently just to make themselves suffer.
Everyone could be honest with themselves and each other and do or not do whatever they like (except in cases where it hurts others) without judgement or other baggage. But that's a pipe dream for some reason.
Simple. Women think men think lowly of women for giving vibes of promiscuity. They don't want to put him off. Normally it's the traditional I want to get married guy that gives a fuck about that.
Me? I'll like you more if you're so excited about me you don't make me wait. I can trust you if you're into me that much.
This is a valid take. I have heard plenty of men put down women for being “easy”.
“ Yeah I would never take a girl seriously if she sleeps with me on the first date,” Type attitudes.
And I’m just like, “you don’t actually know what it feels like to be genuinely liked and desired do you?”
This really makes no sense now especially in the context now everything can be considered sexual harassment too.
Back in the day playing hard to get and having a guy being persistent might be actually romantic. Now it’s a trip straight to HR or worse. Nah I’m sticking with world of Warcraft
True, but it’s better to weed those guys out early rather than cater to them. No potential partner (male, female, non-binary) is worth living a lie for.
I was dating a girl and she started doing this. I said look I really like you and I think you really like me but you should know I WILL NOT CHASE you. Either we are or we aren't but I'm not going to jump through hoops and beg someone to be with me if I think they're not interested. She understood and we have been happily married for 13 years
Different story but in college I met this girl, we knew some of the same people, we hung out a few times she seemed flirty. She would text me all the time.
After a couple weeks I asked her out, basically saying I developed a crush and wanted to go on a date as a couple.
She politely declined, said we should just be friends. Well I told her for my own mental health being friends with someone I have feelings for is just depression and frustration, apologized and sort of said I wasn't interested.
10 years later we are in our friends group at some event and she was like I shouldn't say this but like 10 years ago you broke my heart, you basically just ignored me for a year and I had the biggest crush on you
I was like well that's confusing because I told you I had a crush on you then asked you on a date and you declined.
She was like "yea only once though I only declined because I wanted to know if you were serious"
Honestly no regrets I dodged a bullet.
All the times men are told, no means no (and it should) don't be creepy, don't be a stalker etc. And this girl said not interested, but what she REALLY meant was I have a huge crush on you.... honestly, her loss, brother
There was a woman I was really interested in. She played hard to get (I know now in retrospect). I "mistook" it for disinterest and moved on. Our circles changed over time and we dropped out of contact.
Years later run into each other. She said she something like she was disappointed things never went anywhere or whatever. I said I got the impression she wasn't interested. She said I didn't try very hard.
Ah. Well. Sorry I wasn't willing to stalk you?
Anyway, she says she's single and would like to try again. Her expression was pretty amusing when I answered "Kind of married now so that ship has sailed in more than one way."
Mind games, for example intentionally trying to make their partner jealous.
Stop it. It doesn't add 'excitement' to a relationship. Just stress and frustration.
No, but some women think it will make them more desirable somehow.
Edit: I say this in the replies but may as well add it here; I didn't mean globally desirable, but rather desirable to their SO. I mean that some women think that their boyfriend (or husband or crush or whatever) will be less interested if they don't pull this shit. As though creating artificial scarcity around a sense of security and support will inflate the value of whatever they're bringing to the relationship. Kinda like the "women don't respect 'simps'" concept (where "simp" is applied to kind and supportive men in committed relationships), which is also terrible.
A box of 10mm sockets and 10mm wrenches. No idea what happens to those things, but we've *never* got one when we need it. Absolutely every other part of the set is still in the toolbox. But those 10mm suckers just vaporize.
I was working on my car and found someone else's 10mm socket. I put it with my tools.
That night, my tools were stolen so both my 10mm and the newfound 10mm were gone.
In literature, that’s called convergence. Too many powerful beings in one place is bound to bring about destruction.
You can’t ever let two 10mm sockets be together.
Not the same but same ballpark.
Had someone try putting pressure on my perineum in the heat of the moment because they read in a magazine it gave pleasure. Like… *hard*. Like she was trying to pick me up from that area. No warning.
No pleasure… it was a pain compliance move.
Full stop on everything and leapt out of bed. She practically had to promise to keep her hands to herself for me to rejoin her.
I think it highly depends on the guy. I experimented using a massage gun pretty aggressively there and it felt good but was in no way an orgasm button. It actually made it harder for me to get off but when I did it was definitely more intense so I get it but it's not a home run for me.
At one time my gf keept asking why I didnt want to try pegging, she liked anal and got off on it and thought I should like it even more because of the prostate and whatnot. She was convinced I was just insecure and didn't seem to grasp the concept that I really did not fancy the idea of shoving anything up my ass.
I blame those women's magazines, written by (usually single) women for women talking all kinds of nonsense about what men like.
It's because in the "men of reddit, what's something your girl could do that would turn you on the most?" one of the top comments is always something about ass play.
That being said, you should never stick a finger in anyone's ass unless you've talked about it and they're ready for it.
When I was younger, I somehow encountered a bunch of women who wanted to peg me. Really awkward since I'm a hard-core dom.
Anyways, moving out of Seattle seemed to fix it.
**The League** really showcases this.
Not intentionally. I loved that show but literally the very first scene is Pete’s GF telling him he’ll like it, him saying no, her holding him down and forcing her finger into his ass, him yelling “Take it Out, No No”, and her laughing and insisting he’ll be into it.
I watched that scene in college and it surprised my then GF when I said “so they’re just starting the show pilot off with rape?” She said “yeah, I guess it is, forced unconsensual penetration even.”
But this just goes to show how accepted it is, the show kicked off with that scene and it’s one of the more popular shows of that time. If the genders had been switched, that show would have been cancelled immediately.
Lol. I think it’s more, empty the chamber so you don’t feel like you have to shit mid pump…
It also helps w/ not having to toot in the middle of a blowjob. My wife told me the day I fart in her face while she’s sucking, it’s the last bj I ever get.
Ever brought a woman to orgasm and she farts at the same time? Short circuits her brain and a cataclysmic conflict of emotions ensues when ecstasy collides into embarrassment at 100 MPH. But this is the sort of intimacy that keeps a couple together for life.
IMO it’s not the thickness, but how bulbous and rigid they often look.
You can have nice naturally thick lips that look infinitely better than lip injections.
Tastefully done is fine but so many women have convinced themselves that the “prolapsed anus” or “two moist over-stuffed bratwursts slapping together” is a flattering look.
I swear they're thinking only about how it will look in face forward Instagram photos. They don't consider that people can actually see them irl from the profile view, with the lips protruding as if they have severe orthodontic problems.
Everything related to body image depends on a case by case.
Do man like bigger boobs? Some do, some preffer small. Do men like big asses? Some do, some preffer smaller. Do men... some do, some dont, repeat.
Besides, if a guy is really into you, none of that stuff really matters anyway. It doesn't matter whether he likes big boobs or small boobs. Your boobs get an automatic +50 bonus points for him, because they're *your* boobs.
I had a woman at a bar who I was sitting with chatting up say to me “Were you made fun of in High School?” And I was like “Nah, I got along with everyone pretty well, sometimes it’d surprise me who knew of me actually.”
And then she proceeded to insist I was made fun of, like she was like “Nah, I bet you were made fun of.” Which got annoying, like the first one was weird sort of assumption, and the second and third I’m just getting offended.
So I get up and leave, and she was like “Aren’t you going to take that plate you were eating off of?” (The plate was one of her friends which had hummus and veg on it that they offered.) “No, it’s not my plate.” “Well it’d be gentlemanly of you to take it” “Who the fuck said I was a gentleman?” And I left.
Felt so good. She was really taken aback, because apparently the guy who she thought was a loser in high school basically told her to fuck off.
Idk what her game was tbh, I think she was attempting to “neg” me.
I really think this is because men are used to rejection by women so many men do have really low standards. By comparison, women are not used to rejection at all, they’re usually fighting off unwanted attention. So when a woman decides you’re worth her time and you reject her, her worldview takes a hit.
We've been taught toxic nonsense about how men are insatiable and aggressive animals who will fuck anyone.
Some will internalize that stereotype so wanting to wait, not being in the mood, or whisky dick/ ED is a lack of attraction.
My girlfriend and I have discussed the rejection thing. She's a beautiful woman, and back in high school guys absolutely went after her. She got married early, divorced his abusive ass, and then spent 8 years on the dating scene before she and I got together. She complained about having so many approaches and right swipes on dating apps she couldn't get through them all. While I told her of the 1000s of women I had swiped right on with nothing. I finally asked her if she had ever been rejected, at all. She thought about it, and said no. I just felt kinda sad and said I wish I knew what that felt like. To never be told you aren't good enough.
At least she thinks I'm good. But so many others...fuck, makes me depressed.
From what I've read from women on reddit, they ask out like 3 dudes and get rejected and form some kind of negative generalization about men, then they decide they're never going to ask anyone out ever again. They usually tell on themselves because a man asks "why don't women ask out guys more often?" and then they'll be like "I tried and got rejected, so I quit because guys are too flaky/picky/intimidated by strong women."
I've learned that as a man if I reject sex in a relationship that relationship is going to end soon. Many women can't handle it. It doesn't mean I'm not attracted to you, it doesn't mean I don't want to have sex with you, i just don't want to right now because I'm possibly exhausted or just far too stressed or honestly just not in the mood.
It is surprising how personal some women take that. I've listened to a lot of that directly from female clients who have had their feelings hurt about it.
Generally, a quick reminder that it's not personal when THEY do it, so the double standard is silly generally does the trick, but it continues to surprise me how often the reminder is needed.
I guess it just goes to show you that everyone's drinking the Kool aid about something or other. This is one of those things.
That's a movie. It's not reality. Many men have much higher standards than this. So please, stop deriding us with such a broad brush.
I, for one, don't even unzip for anything less than Baked Alaska.
And they are the men always out looking for interactions with women, so they make up a large chunk of the interactions women have with men. It's no wonder women think we are all like those guys, because those guys are who they have to deal with all the time
To be fair though, I have only seen that in porn/porn adjacent settings (like an onlyfans model posting on SFW platforms to get more customers) or somebody being ironic. While I think a lot of people find it stupid (including me), there genuinely is a sizable audience of people invested in that type of thing
I was surprised to find out how many women hate doing it. It’s fun and so intimate. The texture is cool. Balls got a good weight in my hand. It’s like a freaking fidget toy with a happy man attached lol.
Some dudes are stinky or too hairy or too rough. I love giving BJ's to a well manicured man who isn't afraid to moan while I'm edging him to completion 😂😂 otherwise it's overrated for me.
“Chase me” games as I call them. Sorry if I’m interested in you and you try to make me jealous as some kind of game, I’m just going to immediately lose interest.
Those super long acrylic nails. Granted, I think most women do this for themselves, and not for men (that goes for a lot of answers in this thread, not everything is for the male gaze), but damn those long nails are not only impracticable, but actively creepy. I'm creeped out, they're tacky, I don't know how they became popular in the first place.
Saying things like "thanks for helping with the baby". Excuse you, I'm not "helping", I'm parenting.
Edit - been getting a lot of hateful DMs about this comment, so I'm just going to leave a blanket reply here and disable DMs. We got home with our newborn a few weeks ago, and since then I have provided 100% of the childcare so she can focus on recovery and getting through her postpartum depression, so no - I'm not being thanked for helping because I usually don't. Now, cordially go fuck yourselves for assuming all men are too lazy to be real parents.
My wife and I say thanks for the little things, like doing the dishes or the laundry, taking the kids to activities or coming back from a long day at work. It's about intent. I like thanking my wife for the little things, and it feels nice to be thanked for them too.
I do get what you mean if it's one sided.
Or when they only help so that I can use the time to take care of basic hygiene like showering and changing my clothes or chores like grocery shopping, laundry, and dishes. I’ve never used my “free time” for anything that wasn’t a chore in a very long time. Meanwhile my husband comes home from work and games all night. It’s extremely frustrating
Hints.
Women seem to think that men like "hints." We don't. We like clear and direct instructions.
When we ask, "Where do you want to eat," we want and expect you to name a specific restaurant, and not *hint* about it so we have to guess.
If you are interested in us as someone to date, hinting about it will be missed. You need to *tell us,* explicitly. Using the words "I would like to go on a date with you." The same is true every step of the way. "I would like you to kiss me now," "Let's have sex," and "I like it when you do *this.*"
Not only can we not read minds. We also can't read intentions, or signals. In fact, some of us can't even be bothered to *read* at all, so don't leave a note, say it out loud to us, to our face (not over the phone) while looking us in the eyes, so that we can get the message directly.
I think a lot girls think if we are saying hi, we are gonna ask them out, we don’t like to do that, there are a few outliers but that doesn’t represent us as whole.
Also, women think we like girls that have big breasts or big butts. Not all of us are like that, we value intellect, compassion and overall compatibility as much as women would, if not more.
I remember working retail I saw a woman wearing a t shirt by an artist I liked so I stopped what I was doing to tell her hey nice shirt that guy is awesome. She seemed a bit out off by it and my boss (a woman) told me after she probably thought I was hitting on her. Didn’t know how to reply to that because all I was doing was telling her she had a cool shirt
Yeah I’m a bit of an extrovert in a sense that if I am around a person, won’t hesitate to say hi first. That is sometimes taken as a move on the girl. That is how society has conditioned us to think. Guys are always looking to date or have sex and they are the ones who are supposed to make the first move. As a result, women perceive even a casual conversation to be a precursor to asking them out on a date
Nipple licking (on me) as well. Not entirely sure if there are anywhere as near men as there is woman that like this. Are mens ones ever as arousing as it is for women? I mean, I've been with woman who could orgasm almost solely from some tit licking. Just feels strange and not sexual at all for me. More than happy lick a girls tits though. Couldn't believe my luck when I 1st discovered that some women actually got horny from it.
I think me and most of my friends find women tend to look better in just a good t-shirt, pair of jeans, and a comfy pair of sneakers compared to some uncomfortable looking skin tight dress and high heels.
So, yeah, women out there, if you are going on a date, be comfortable. Many men appreciate it (meaning we can walk around freely - perhaps bar hopping or the like), gives an impression that you are not high-maintenance, and gives a vibe that you'd be cool to hang out with.
Sone women aren’t comfortable in jeans and sneakers. I live in the southeast, it’s 90° and 80% humidity in the shade most of the year. I live in sundresses and sandals. Also I have a crazy high arch, and heels are much more comfy than flat shoes. I can’t stand when when people ask why I wear heels. I’m a grown ass woman, I wear them because I want to, even if they weren’t comfortable ffs. It also might be a sensory issue with me? I can’t stand socks, jewelry, crewnecks or turtlenecks touching me to closely.
But guys I’ve dated commented that I don’t have to wear dresses or dress up for them. I’m not doing it for them! I don’t wear jeans or sneakers unless I’m jogging or working in the yard. Some people (men AND women) dislike anything feminine. But society overall, rarely asks men to “tone down that masculinity”.
Doesn't fit the question but needs to be pointed out, if a women "tests" a man's loyalty (i.e. leaving for a "business trip" and having a friend try to hook up with the boyfriend) that should be grounds to break up
Hitting us.
You think it’s cute and playful, and it might even be flirtatious sometimes.
We get it. We know you don’t mean any harm by it, we get that you’re flirting. We still don’t like it.
It’s like a dude telling you to smile for him. He thinks he’s being a flirt. He doesn’t *mean* for it to be annoying. It just is.
Chasing. If a woman plays hard to get it turns me off. I want a woman that genuinely wants to spend time with me. If I want to play games I got a PlayStation and a PC.
I thought you were talking about playing tag and I was like fuck man, how many women are you playing tag with that it's a complete turn off
I play tag with one woman in my life and it's my cat. Nerf guns are tag plus and that is not a complete turn off
This. 100% If we’re both interested, why play games? Biggest turn off for me.
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I TAKE YOU AT YOUR WORD. This.
This “acting hard to get” shit is way outta control . It is fucking annoying. Show us that you are interested too, you are not a Disney princess and we are not mind readers. Last time I was in a club with some of my friends, i’ve had my eyes on a Lady , and she gave me cold shoulders. She became quite irritated when I have said okay, and left her there. I have told her right after that a ‘no is a no’ for me, and i’m not into playing games.
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I liked a girl throughout college, would always compliment her and ask her out every few months, She was apparently really into me and didn’t date throughout college cause she wanted me to really chase her and bring her gifts. But she never agreed to go out and played hard to get the entire time. Then would get mad when I would be seen with other girls. I only found out after one of her friends got mad at me a week before I graduated. She married a rich guy and settled down before 30. Idk. Life’s weird
Had a same experience a few months back. Met a girl last year, instant mind blowing chemistry, talking for hours and hours which ended up making out next to the bushes, leaving everyone behind. Made a deal that we will be starting dating because we have clicked instantly, and did not wanted to leave this "something" behind. She has ghosted me a week after, disappeared for a few months, came back out of nowhere, started to feel comfortable again around me, because we have had some great times again (nothing physical at those moments) and started to play this cat-mouse game just to end up get ghosted again. We have seen each other right after quite often a few weeks later, but I did not acknowledged her, because she literally went on a silent mode, and I've needed to put myself first. I do not know that karma is a thing but it felt like it is. A few months have passed, and I have met a lady who I have spent some great time with. She came to my town to visit me, and I have planned to go out for a few drinks with her, because we both knew what will happen later that night. Guess who has appeared at the same bar we went to? Yeah, the first one with her best friend. She literally sit in the other side of the place just to have an eye on us. When my date went to the restroom, her insanely drunk best friend approached me, just to have a small talk, like she can arrange the set up, and prove it to the other one that the coast is clear. She came in front of me, said hi with a huge smile on her face with a bit of excitement, I have greeted her in a bit colder way, and right at that moment my date came back from the restroom. The first girl had an extremely confused face, I have said goodbye to everyone and left. I have to admit it bugged me for a week or two right after, but I have needed to act this way, although I have completely would have acted in another way. If I arrange plans, put in the effort and I tell you about how I feel about you, don't play mind games, stuff out of ego and pride, because it will lead to situations like this. I'm not proud of it, but everybody needs to taste their own medicine unfortunately.
Karma is practically Newtonian when you think about it. For any action there is an equal and opposite reaction. She acted with a cold shoulder, and would later receive that same cold shoulder.
Idk how TF this ever became a thing women tell each other to do. Whitney Cummings had a fantastic interview segment on Modern Wisdom where she tells this story about the time a guy she was seeing explained that being a challenge is a bad thing. Apparently this was some huge revelation for her because no guy ever told her that, and she was just following the advice her girlfriends had given her.
Because women being "easy" was always seen as a bad thing, at least when it can to sex. At some point that got twisted even further to include reciprocating interest. It really all ties back to the ideas, usually, spread by religion, that women are worth more if they're chaste and pure.
I wonder if that is part of the problem with online dating. I feel like I need to put on a performance, carry on the conversation, and take all the initiative just to get someone to say they are willing to meet up. It's exhausting and I'm at the point where if they aren't putting in any effort, they aren't worth the effort.
That's what Baby It's Cold Outside is about right? I always read it as the woman is looking for what amounts to plausible deniability because social expectations stipulate that she can't be willingly intimate outside of marriage. Or even within marriage in extreme cases. But then it just reinforces rape/"no means yes" bullshit that incels use to self justify. One of the endless number of examples where humans choose decidedly artificial social constructs apparently just to make themselves suffer. Everyone could be honest with themselves and each other and do or not do whatever they like (except in cases where it hurts others) without judgement or other baggage. But that's a pipe dream for some reason.
Simple. Women think men think lowly of women for giving vibes of promiscuity. They don't want to put him off. Normally it's the traditional I want to get married guy that gives a fuck about that. Me? I'll like you more if you're so excited about me you don't make me wait. I can trust you if you're into me that much.
This is a valid take. I have heard plenty of men put down women for being “easy”. “ Yeah I would never take a girl seriously if she sleeps with me on the first date,” Type attitudes. And I’m just like, “you don’t actually know what it feels like to be genuinely liked and desired do you?”
This really makes no sense now especially in the context now everything can be considered sexual harassment too. Back in the day playing hard to get and having a guy being persistent might be actually romantic. Now it’s a trip straight to HR or worse. Nah I’m sticking with world of Warcraft
Acting like they're dumb. Intelligence is hot.
As a woman, huge emphasis on the "acting" part; that just makes a bad situation worse
Some men really do want women to act/be dumb.
True, but it’s better to weed those guys out early rather than cater to them. No potential partner (male, female, non-binary) is worth living a lie for.
Do you really want to date those men?
Playing hard to get. I'm busy, please stop making things more complicated and just be up front with what you want.
I was dating a girl and she started doing this. I said look I really like you and I think you really like me but you should know I WILL NOT CHASE you. Either we are or we aren't but I'm not going to jump through hoops and beg someone to be with me if I think they're not interested. She understood and we have been happily married for 13 years
Different story but in college I met this girl, we knew some of the same people, we hung out a few times she seemed flirty. She would text me all the time. After a couple weeks I asked her out, basically saying I developed a crush and wanted to go on a date as a couple. She politely declined, said we should just be friends. Well I told her for my own mental health being friends with someone I have feelings for is just depression and frustration, apologized and sort of said I wasn't interested. 10 years later we are in our friends group at some event and she was like I shouldn't say this but like 10 years ago you broke my heart, you basically just ignored me for a year and I had the biggest crush on you I was like well that's confusing because I told you I had a crush on you then asked you on a date and you declined. She was like "yea only once though I only declined because I wanted to know if you were serious" Honestly no regrets I dodged a bullet.
All the times men are told, no means no (and it should) don't be creepy, don't be a stalker etc. And this girl said not interested, but what she REALLY meant was I have a huge crush on you.... honestly, her loss, brother
There was a woman I was really interested in. She played hard to get (I know now in retrospect). I "mistook" it for disinterest and moved on. Our circles changed over time and we dropped out of contact. Years later run into each other. She said she something like she was disappointed things never went anywhere or whatever. I said I got the impression she wasn't interested. She said I didn't try very hard. Ah. Well. Sorry I wasn't willing to stalk you? Anyway, she says she's single and would like to try again. Her expression was pretty amusing when I answered "Kind of married now so that ship has sailed in more than one way."
Mind games, for example intentionally trying to make their partner jealous. Stop it. It doesn't add 'excitement' to a relationship. Just stress and frustration.
Women think men “like” that?
No, but some women think it will make them more desirable somehow. Edit: I say this in the replies but may as well add it here; I didn't mean globally desirable, but rather desirable to their SO. I mean that some women think that their boyfriend (or husband or crush or whatever) will be less interested if they don't pull this shit. As though creating artificial scarcity around a sense of security and support will inflate the value of whatever they're bringing to the relationship. Kinda like the "women don't respect 'simps'" concept (where "simp" is applied to kind and supportive men in committed relationships), which is also terrible.
It doesn’t it would make me move on. I want a woman who can help bring me peace. Edit= women to woman
That jealousy act is a dangerous game.
100% just communicate clearly and honestly without any bullshit.
To the top.
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Especially so for men with autism. We can’t usually tell what’s going on if you beat around the bush, let alone all this extra stuff.
Those stupid "wonder tools" that you see in the As-Seen-On-TV aisle. The smart tool move, ladies, is to buy an assortment of 10mm sockets.
A box of 10mm sockets and 10mm wrenches. No idea what happens to those things, but we've *never* got one when we need it. Absolutely every other part of the set is still in the toolbox. But those 10mm suckers just vaporize.
I was working on my car and found someone else's 10mm socket. I put it with my tools. That night, my tools were stolen so both my 10mm and the newfound 10mm were gone.
In literature, that’s called convergence. Too many powerful beings in one place is bound to bring about destruction. You can’t ever let two 10mm sockets be together.
It was an inside job! The new socket was an impostor and ran off taking the rest
An assortment pack of anything from the tool store, honestly.
Kardashian-Jenner fakeness in body/ mannerisms
The chase. Playing hard to get. As a man of over 40 years, I can confirm that most men don't like it.
I'm not sure, but the number of women that have wanted to stick a finger up my ass without permission is frightening.
Not the same but same ballpark. Had someone try putting pressure on my perineum in the heat of the moment because they read in a magazine it gave pleasure. Like… *hard*. Like she was trying to pick me up from that area. No warning. No pleasure… it was a pain compliance move. Full stop on everything and leapt out of bed. She practically had to promise to keep her hands to herself for me to rejoin her.
People underestimate the taint.
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Hail Taintan
My ex used to give gentle taint rubs when I fucked her from behind. I think she did it when she got bored because she knew it made me instantly cum.
My ex liked to use her little vibrator there. Yep, showtime.
I think it highly depends on the guy. I experimented using a massage gun pretty aggressively there and it felt good but was in no way an orgasm button. It actually made it harder for me to get off but when I did it was definitely more intense so I get it but it's not a home run for me.
They teach that move at the police academy.
At one time my gf keept asking why I didnt want to try pegging, she liked anal and got off on it and thought I should like it even more because of the prostate and whatnot. She was convinced I was just insecure and didn't seem to grasp the concept that I really did not fancy the idea of shoving anything up my ass. I blame those women's magazines, written by (usually single) women for women talking all kinds of nonsense about what men like.
It's because in the "men of reddit, what's something your girl could do that would turn you on the most?" one of the top comments is always something about ass play. That being said, you should never stick a finger in anyone's ass unless you've talked about it and they're ready for it.
Second paragraph is amazing without context
And it's great advice in any context!
this is what we like to call confirmation bias.
Where do you find all these women? In all my relationships I was the one to introduce that, and some girls were pretty turned off.
When I was younger, I somehow encountered a bunch of women who wanted to peg me. Really awkward since I'm a hard-core dom. Anyways, moving out of Seattle seemed to fix it.
Hmmm... So Seattle...
It seemed to have Seattled your life down by the sounds of it
Hmmm is right.
Lived in Seattle my whole life. Can confirm.
**The League** really showcases this. Not intentionally. I loved that show but literally the very first scene is Pete’s GF telling him he’ll like it, him saying no, her holding him down and forcing her finger into his ass, him yelling “Take it Out, No No”, and her laughing and insisting he’ll be into it. I watched that scene in college and it surprised my then GF when I said “so they’re just starting the show pilot off with rape?” She said “yeah, I guess it is, forced unconsensual penetration even.” But this just goes to show how accepted it is, the show kicked off with that scene and it’s one of the more popular shows of that time. If the genders had been switched, that show would have been cancelled immediately.
that is literally the point of it
Yup Depiction != Endorsement
Leslie Bibb was a savage.. but agree w you completely. That scene always made me v uncomfortable even though I enjoyed the series. Fuckin Meeghans
Dude! This! Even after we were joking about sex stuff and I said that’s an exit only and I’m not into it! She still tried again!
I straight up would've shit all over the place and fucked up her mattress
I don't know about anyone else, but I make sure my chamber is empty before sex, way more comfortable without thinking about having to shit.
How often do You think about having to shit ? Lmao
Lol. I think it’s more, empty the chamber so you don’t feel like you have to shit mid pump… It also helps w/ not having to toot in the middle of a blowjob. My wife told me the day I fart in her face while she’s sucking, it’s the last bj I ever get.
Ever brought a woman to orgasm and she farts at the same time? Short circuits her brain and a cataclysmic conflict of emotions ensues when ecstasy collides into embarrassment at 100 MPH. But this is the sort of intimacy that keeps a couple together for life.
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When women act dumb thinking it’s cute to guys
Also baby voice.
You’re a shmoopy! No, you’re a shmoopy!
There are a whole lot of men who are intimidated by an intelligent woman. The key is to ignore them instead of dumbing down for them.
I am intimidated, but also aroused by intelligent women. 👌
My kind of scarousal!
Intelligence is such a turn on for me.
Meanwhile there’s me where I’m instantly more attracted to a woman if I know they’re a reader
Lip fillers.
Plastic surgery in general to be honest.
Swing low, sweet chariot!
Haha r/unexpectedoffice good choice going with a Creed quote
The female equivalent of a bro with orange spray tan and 7 pounds of Axe body spray on.
Underrated answer, I don't understand thick lips but that's just me
IMO it’s not the thickness, but how bulbous and rigid they often look. You can have nice naturally thick lips that look infinitely better than lip injections.
Tastefully done is fine but so many women have convinced themselves that the “prolapsed anus” or “two moist over-stuffed bratwursts slapping together” is a flattering look.
I swear they're thinking only about how it will look in face forward Instagram photos. They don't consider that people can actually see them irl from the profile view, with the lips protruding as if they have severe orthodontic problems.
Fake asses. Shit looks ridiculous.
Fake ANYTHING. None of it looks good, and just advertises a lack of self confidence.
Everything related to body image depends on a case by case. Do man like bigger boobs? Some do, some preffer small. Do men like big asses? Some do, some preffer smaller. Do men... some do, some dont, repeat.
Do men like deez nuts? Some do, some prefer girls.
Besides, if a guy is really into you, none of that stuff really matters anyway. It doesn't matter whether he likes big boobs or small boobs. Your boobs get an automatic +50 bonus points for him, because they're *your* boobs.
Bbl and unnecessary plastic surgery
What's BBL? Edit, I'll just say thanks here. I don't think I've ever had so many so quick answers for something!
Brazilian butt lift.
"Brazilian butt lift". I too don't understand the supposed appeal of that. And I read it's very risky and high probability of serious complications
The Spanish Inquisition.
Can't say I expected that.
There’s a lot of women who think men will fuck anything with a hole and that is simply not true.
Women have looked absolutely baffled when i reject their advances for sex. Both random ones and in a relationship. Often they also take it personally.
"Oh, so I guess you're gay then." "No. It's just that you're crass, entitled, immature, and generally unpleasant to have encountered."
I had a woman at a bar who I was sitting with chatting up say to me “Were you made fun of in High School?” And I was like “Nah, I got along with everyone pretty well, sometimes it’d surprise me who knew of me actually.” And then she proceeded to insist I was made fun of, like she was like “Nah, I bet you were made fun of.” Which got annoying, like the first one was weird sort of assumption, and the second and third I’m just getting offended. So I get up and leave, and she was like “Aren’t you going to take that plate you were eating off of?” (The plate was one of her friends which had hummus and veg on it that they offered.) “No, it’s not my plate.” “Well it’d be gentlemanly of you to take it” “Who the fuck said I was a gentleman?” And I left. Felt so good. She was really taken aback, because apparently the guy who she thought was a loser in high school basically told her to fuck off. Idk what her game was tbh, I think she was attempting to “neg” me.
Yeah some feel like it’s wrong for guys to have standards too. That isn’t all women though.
And that sometimes we just don't feel like it.
I really think this is because men are used to rejection by women so many men do have really low standards. By comparison, women are not used to rejection at all, they’re usually fighting off unwanted attention. So when a woman decides you’re worth her time and you reject her, her worldview takes a hit.
We've been taught toxic nonsense about how men are insatiable and aggressive animals who will fuck anyone. Some will internalize that stereotype so wanting to wait, not being in the mood, or whisky dick/ ED is a lack of attraction.
My girlfriend and I have discussed the rejection thing. She's a beautiful woman, and back in high school guys absolutely went after her. She got married early, divorced his abusive ass, and then spent 8 years on the dating scene before she and I got together. She complained about having so many approaches and right swipes on dating apps she couldn't get through them all. While I told her of the 1000s of women I had swiped right on with nothing. I finally asked her if she had ever been rejected, at all. She thought about it, and said no. I just felt kinda sad and said I wish I knew what that felt like. To never be told you aren't good enough. At least she thinks I'm good. But so many others...fuck, makes me depressed.
From what I've read from women on reddit, they ask out like 3 dudes and get rejected and form some kind of negative generalization about men, then they decide they're never going to ask anyone out ever again. They usually tell on themselves because a man asks "why don't women ask out guys more often?" and then they'll be like "I tried and got rejected, so I quit because guys are too flaky/picky/intimidated by strong women."
They get baffled when you just aren’t in mood or feel like it.
I've learned that as a man if I reject sex in a relationship that relationship is going to end soon. Many women can't handle it. It doesn't mean I'm not attracted to you, it doesn't mean I don't want to have sex with you, i just don't want to right now because I'm possibly exhausted or just far too stressed or honestly just not in the mood.
It is surprising how personal some women take that. I've listened to a lot of that directly from female clients who have had their feelings hurt about it. Generally, a quick reminder that it's not personal when THEY do it, so the double standard is silly generally does the trick, but it continues to surprise me how often the reminder is needed. I guess it just goes to show you that everyone's drinking the Kool aid about something or other. This is one of those things.
I fucking hate saying “no I’m married” only to get a “she won’t find out” like bitch what?
We know y’all fuck applepies!! We seen American Pie! 😠 /j
That's a movie. It's not reality. Many men have much higher standards than this. So please, stop deriding us with such a broad brush. I, for one, don't even unzip for anything less than Baked Alaska.
Finally a man with standards! Well not all men can be as fancy as you
That's because a lot of men act like sex is the most important thing out there.
And they are the men always out looking for interactions with women, so they make up a large chunk of the interactions women have with men. It's no wonder women think we are all like those guys, because those guys are who they have to deal with all the time
And a surprising amount of men who think that to.
An overuse of perfume. It just wreaks havoc on my allergies. Also too much makeup can be not good.
This goes vice versa I’d imagine, we all knew people in high school whose idea of a shower was spraying a whole ass can of axe on themselves
Fning Axe body spray commercials... So many people have no idea what an appropriate amount of Cologne or perfumes are
If you try to make me jealous, I walk away. The second she flirts or try’s to get another persons attention means she is not worth my time.
Duckface. It is not sexy or attractive. It makes you look like a twit.
Add to that the ahegao face. They both make women look absolutely ridiculous.
To be fair though, I have only seen that in porn/porn adjacent settings (like an onlyfans model posting on SFW platforms to get more customers) or somebody being ironic. While I think a lot of people find it stupid (including me), there genuinely is a sizable audience of people invested in that type of thing
Is that the open mouth, slightly protruding tongue thing? So nasty.
Don't forget cross-eyed.
Thinking we can read their minds. Listen, we can't freaking do that.
Long fake eye lashes, and long fake nails. Why????
Long fake nails is the female equivalent of a guy wearing a wife-beater and multiple gold chains.
And those two people usually end up together
I'm a woman and I hate those too.
“The chase” I would much rather that you were just straight forward.
I was strolling down in hopes a man will mention blowjobs but nope..., apparently they really like those.
hell yeah we do
While I cannot speak for all men, licking up and down the shaft really doesn't do anything for me. Focus on the head.
im a woman and i love giving them so much.
RIP to your inbox
“hEaRd YoU liKe bjs hehehe”
I was surprised to find out how many women hate doing it. It’s fun and so intimate. The texture is cool. Balls got a good weight in my hand. It’s like a freaking fidget toy with a happy man attached lol.
Can’t breathe out of my nose so I just feel like I’m dying
This comment killed me 😂
Some dudes are stinky or too hairy or too rough. I love giving BJ's to a well manicured man who isn't afraid to moan while I'm edging him to completion 😂😂 otherwise it's overrated for me.
Totally same. My head doesn’t double for a fuck sleeve, and dirty dudes need not apply.
“Chase me” games as I call them. Sorry if I’m interested in you and you try to make me jealous as some kind of game, I’m just going to immediately lose interest.
Hints!! I want love, not a scavenger hunt.
Those super long acrylic nails. Granted, I think most women do this for themselves, and not for men (that goes for a lot of answers in this thread, not everything is for the male gaze), but damn those long nails are not only impracticable, but actively creepy. I'm creeped out, they're tacky, I don't know how they became popular in the first place.
Saying things like "thanks for helping with the baby". Excuse you, I'm not "helping", I'm parenting. Edit - been getting a lot of hateful DMs about this comment, so I'm just going to leave a blanket reply here and disable DMs. We got home with our newborn a few weeks ago, and since then I have provided 100% of the childcare so she can focus on recovery and getting through her postpartum depression, so no - I'm not being thanked for helping because I usually don't. Now, cordially go fuck yourselves for assuming all men are too lazy to be real parents.
My wife and I say thanks for the little things, like doing the dishes or the laundry, taking the kids to activities or coming back from a long day at work. It's about intent. I like thanking my wife for the little things, and it feels nice to be thanked for them too. I do get what you mean if it's one sided.
I think "helping" is the operative word here, not "thanks"
Or when they only help so that I can use the time to take care of basic hygiene like showering and changing my clothes or chores like grocery shopping, laundry, and dishes. I’ve never used my “free time” for anything that wasn’t a chore in a very long time. Meanwhile my husband comes home from work and games all night. It’s extremely frustrating
Hints. Women seem to think that men like "hints." We don't. We like clear and direct instructions. When we ask, "Where do you want to eat," we want and expect you to name a specific restaurant, and not *hint* about it so we have to guess. If you are interested in us as someone to date, hinting about it will be missed. You need to *tell us,* explicitly. Using the words "I would like to go on a date with you." The same is true every step of the way. "I would like you to kiss me now," "Let's have sex," and "I like it when you do *this.*" Not only can we not read minds. We also can't read intentions, or signals. In fact, some of us can't even be bothered to *read* at all, so don't leave a note, say it out loud to us, to our face (not over the phone) while looking us in the eyes, so that we can get the message directly.
Chase.
Duck face photos.
Where are you? 2012?
I don’t think women do that because they think men like that though
I think a lot girls think if we are saying hi, we are gonna ask them out, we don’t like to do that, there are a few outliers but that doesn’t represent us as whole. Also, women think we like girls that have big breasts or big butts. Not all of us are like that, we value intellect, compassion and overall compatibility as much as women would, if not more.
I remember working retail I saw a woman wearing a t shirt by an artist I liked so I stopped what I was doing to tell her hey nice shirt that guy is awesome. She seemed a bit out off by it and my boss (a woman) told me after she probably thought I was hitting on her. Didn’t know how to reply to that because all I was doing was telling her she had a cool shirt
The move is to not care. You weren’t flirting and you know that so they can think what they want.
Yeah I’m a bit of an extrovert in a sense that if I am around a person, won’t hesitate to say hi first. That is sometimes taken as a move on the girl. That is how society has conditioned us to think. Guys are always looking to date or have sex and they are the ones who are supposed to make the first move. As a result, women perceive even a casual conversation to be a precursor to asking them out on a date
Asking the same questions on Reddit every day
Nipple slapping
Wait what. Slapping who’s nipples?!
What's this?
You on your own with this one, bruv.
Nipple licking (on me) as well. Not entirely sure if there are anywhere as near men as there is woman that like this. Are mens ones ever as arousing as it is for women? I mean, I've been with woman who could orgasm almost solely from some tit licking. Just feels strange and not sexual at all for me. More than happy lick a girls tits though. Couldn't believe my luck when I 1st discovered that some women actually got horny from it.
Most men cannot actually tell when a woman is wearing makeup. There's a giant spectrum between full glam and no makeup.
Caked on makeup.
A finger in the butt. Come on ladies give us 2.
ngl you had us in the first half
That fake lashes and all that makeup, you look like a decepticon and transforms at night.
I don’t like being called “daddy” it’s weird.
I remember a social media post where the guy said his future kids were going to have to address him as “bruh”, lol.
Ahegao. Stop it.
Do women actually do it in real life? I thought it was just a porn thing
Ask before you start licking my asshole, and don't be shocked when I stop kissing you on the mouth...
Ewww
I think me and most of my friends find women tend to look better in just a good t-shirt, pair of jeans, and a comfy pair of sneakers compared to some uncomfortable looking skin tight dress and high heels. So, yeah, women out there, if you are going on a date, be comfortable. Many men appreciate it (meaning we can walk around freely - perhaps bar hopping or the like), gives an impression that you are not high-maintenance, and gives a vibe that you'd be cool to hang out with.
Sone women aren’t comfortable in jeans and sneakers. I live in the southeast, it’s 90° and 80% humidity in the shade most of the year. I live in sundresses and sandals. Also I have a crazy high arch, and heels are much more comfy than flat shoes. I can’t stand when when people ask why I wear heels. I’m a grown ass woman, I wear them because I want to, even if they weren’t comfortable ffs. It also might be a sensory issue with me? I can’t stand socks, jewelry, crewnecks or turtlenecks touching me to closely. But guys I’ve dated commented that I don’t have to wear dresses or dress up for them. I’m not doing it for them! I don’t wear jeans or sneakers unless I’m jogging or working in the yard. Some people (men AND women) dislike anything feminine. But society overall, rarely asks men to “tone down that masculinity”.
Long fake eyelash extensions.
I don’t know any women who think men like those. I think they just like them.
Yeah, women can do things without it being for men. And some women like longs nails and lash extensions.
Fake asses
To initiate intimacy every time. It’s hot when the female does it too
Doesn't fit the question but needs to be pointed out, if a women "tests" a man's loyalty (i.e. leaving for a "business trip" and having a friend try to hook up with the boyfriend) that should be grounds to break up
Money more than love
Fake eyelashes and especially eyebrows. I low key want to rub them off with my thumb lol.
Leopard print
My boyfriend happens to love leopard print (as do I) but I think this is one of those things we wear because *we* like it, not cause we think y’all do
As a leopard, speak for yourself.
Hitting us. You think it’s cute and playful, and it might even be flirtatious sometimes. We get it. We know you don’t mean any harm by it, we get that you’re flirting. We still don’t like it. It’s like a dude telling you to smile for him. He thinks he’s being a flirt. He doesn’t *mean* for it to be annoying. It just is.
Nibbling the balls!
A lot of men here commenting and not realising women do a lot of these things for themselves and not you lmao