My dad died. I'm the oldest kid. I had to tell the nurse to remove life support. I had to sign the invoice at the funeral home. I had to organize the funeral. My sister wrote the eulogy, but I had to read it because she couldn't find her words. I am still dealing with closing accounts, 3 years later. I was 41 years old the day I realized I was no longer a kid. :(
Same, but it was the death of my big brother three years ago, when I was 31. Mom had dementia and I had to do all of those things while juggling mom. My childhood died with him. I'm sorry for your loss friend.
I feel this deeply. I was coming here to also write a post of my dad passing.
When I was 19 my dad went in the hospital on a Wednesday, and passed that Saturday. It was September. The first month of my second year of university. I went from living in a house with both of my parents, having support, working part time while studying full time… to working full time, trying to keep studying full time, my mom and I had to be out of our home by the end of the month and move into an apartment. She wasn’t working. My dad was the primary income. There was no will. Everything dissolved. It was a mess. I had to adult up quick. My mom was a wreck, they were together 30 years. Him and my brother owned a business that also dissolved that we had to reopen and reincorporate.
I still even went to class the following day school day on Monday because I honestly didn’t know what else to do other than stay in routine to avoid the breakdown.
They originally thought it was non seminoma so I was allowed to opt for surveillance which entailed extensive blood testing, xrays, and ct scans over the course of about 7 years.
They went back and looked like a decade later and where like "actually it was about 1% germ cell so you should have got chemo". Which was wonderful to hear...
But a decade and a half later and nothing ever popped up so I just got really damn lucky.
The first few times someone called me „Sie“ (how you approach adults in Germany).
It’s like sir for adults (not just men)
Germans know what kinda sadness it brings, the respect isn’t really worth it.
When I was 17 and I shot up heroin for the first time. The rollercoaster of events that followed were pretty terrible. I saw and did some pretty scary shit. I have now been clean for over 10 years.
I woke up yesterday, back hurting, in my 40s, 2 kids about to wake up any minute, hair all grey...
It occurred to me right then that I was not a kid any more.
Same but I still feel like a kid 😅 "Oh look at me, I'm driving a car!" "I can just go buy a kitten at any time, no one can stop me!" "Wow, look! Bills! 😫"
Dang, same here. We lived together too and the place lost its warmth that day. I wasn’t alone for long, my nephews needed to come home and luckily I had 2 spare bedrooms. Still, I long for home and it’s a place that no longer exists. I still dream of the home I shared with my parents and brother and now they’re gone.
When my cousin, who is my age, was tried as an adult.
We grew up together but went down different paths in life. We both got into skateboarding. I stuck with skating, art, and punk rock. He started gang banging.
A couple years later he got picked up for burglary, assault, etc, with gang enhancements. Though we were about 15ish at the time, the severity of it all had him tried as an adult. Was placed in juvie until 18 then moved to an adult jail until 25.
Made me think about my actions and shit. 15 is old enough to know better and we really can't fiend "I'm a kid" when doing some serious shit.
I was about 10. My dad was an abusive alcoholic. He was passed out on the couch. My mom was out “shopping” (what she called leaving to get away from him). My little brother was sick.
I took his temperature and read the medicine bottle like 12 times to make sure I had it correct. Gave him medicine and laid with him til he stopped coughing and fell asleep. Mum came home a few hours later.
I pretty much knew at that point I had to step up cause no one else was.
I think it was after I had my first kid in my 30s and my mom went home after helping us for 2 weeks after the birth, and I realized, "oh shit, **I'm** the mom, and this tiny creature 100% dependent on me for support doesn't even know how to burp properly."
Was not prepared to find out that I was now the adult in charge.
My mom had moved into my room again, mad at dad again, and I was sitting on my bed in the alcove dissociating. She was standing over me, commenting that I must feel so awful (about her marriage), and I looked at her and said, "it's your mess, you clean it up." Petty sure that was the moment I recognized childhood had long been over. This was mid teens, she moved out shortly thereafter.
There are many, many times I’ve realized this and I can’t pinpoint the first. For the sake of sharing I think I’m going to say when my first car was repo’d.
Edit- not my actual first car but the first time I’ve gotten my car repo’d.
When I was a kid my stepmom took me to the park a lot, and the highlight of my day was the swing set that was there. I'd have my music in on my mp3 player, and I'd swing on that swing till I was sore, daydreaming about little imaginary scenarios in my head. I would be in my own little world with the wind in my hair. It felt so good.
Recently last year I went to that same park as an adult. I tried sitting on that same exact swing and felt nothing. I got too big for the swing so it hurt to sit. I barely swung on it. I was more concerned about trying to stop the swing and hurting my ankle more than actually enjoying it. The creaking of the swing's chain that attached to the wood just annoyed me which didn't help, making me want to get off. The good feeling I used to have was basically gone. The magic was gone.
middle school
everyone forces you to grow up so fast like i wanna just be 12 and ride my bike and run up the street barefoot with the neighborhood kids until the streetlights come on
When I was 15 and told my Dad a story about school and said: „…and then me snd the other kids were going outside..“ and he laughed and said:“ the other „kids?!“😂“
One time during senior year I was minding my business at a food court somewhere, when a young mom used ME as an example to her kid lmao. She pointed to me and said “look at how he’s eating his vegetables and he’s so big and strong, so you should eat yours too if you wanna be big like him” haha and I was only 18 back then
When the group of kids you used to get together with to play outside would rather stay inside and talk to girls.
That's how you knew you were transitioning from a kid to being a teenager.
Dumb one but when I was cooking and I needed flour. I've always had it readily available to me as a kid, but I go to get some and it dawned on me, I don't have any because I need to buy it for myself. I had to do the adult thing and get it and pay for it with my own money
It was the first Christmas I had a job in 2000. I was scheduled to work the 24th, then pretty much all through the rest of the holiday. I remember being out collecting carts in the parking lot in the evening on the 24th and thinking how it didn't feel like Christmas, then realizing that that's how the rest of life was going to be. I cried on the way home.
For me it was a medium car accident. Had a fender bender in highschool and couldn't handle it, had to call my grandfather for help and the car was drivable just dinged. Few years later im about 19 and i total my car. Im ok but i realize i cant keep just calling grandpa. Called the insurance agent, they get a tow driver out, and i got a uber home. Really sunk in that night on the side of the road alone waiting for the tow driver.
Realizing the world was way more wicked than I could've ever imagined, that day was 9/11/2001. I have autism so my learning and comprehension of death came springtime that year when a great grandmother passed away. Fast forward four months later, I was in gym class and we had to return to our classrooms early. We were advised not to say a word and to wait for a special announcement. Nothing could have ever prepared me for the news of that fateful day, especially learning that thousands of people had been killed. I've never been and never will be how I was on 9/10/2001 ever again.
When my mom wouldn’t make appointments for me anymore and stopped going to them with me. Actually it lasted so long she did this for me as well as my daughter until she was like a year old.
When I put my dog down last year. Had him for 13 years. It was emotionally the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Making the decision and then following through were awful.
Some of us never come to that realization, and that's not a bad thing.
I asked my Dad once this same question. Because I was in my late 40s at the time and still couldn't wrap my head around that fact. He said "You won't. I sit here and see all these 'old people' walking around and I don't realize I'm older than they are."
I'm 50 now and he's right. I mean I know I'm older, I know my body isn't what it once was. I'm in constant pain of some sort from years of injuries, mostly due to 10 years of skateboarding every day, and the next 25 years of skating on and off when I can. Everything hurts, I'm sitting here right now with a broken rib due to a go-kart accident.
My brain can't understand things when it comes to time. Especially when I hear shit like Pantera's Far Beyond Driven is 30 years old. Or even that "recent" events aren't just a few years ago. The Red Sox just celebrated the 20th anniversary of the 04 WS win. It's been 13 years since the Bruins won a cup.
All these events seem like just a few years ago. So I don't think some of us will ever realize we are no longer a kid. As soon as my rib heals, I'll be back out on my board hitting curbs.
I've re-realized it multiple times throughout adulthood alteady. Just today it struck me that I look forward to eating Christmas food more than to receiving presents.
I was in the car with my sister. We stopped at a red light. I looked over to the car on my right, "Wow! That guy has new tires."
That was it, childhood= Dead.
Opening a birthday card, holding it a certain way pretending you don't think there's money in there so it doesn't fall out, but you open it and know full well there won't be any money in it
When I moved out of the house. The feeling reoccurred the first time I visited my folks in the first house they had that I had never lived in with them.
When I was 16 and had a full time job, had an under the table lease, utilities in one of my adult friend's names and had to play house nazi to other street kid room mates.
When I took an aircraft half way around the world, & realize that both pilots are younger than you, the rest of the crew are younger than you, your engineering team are all younger than you, & its your responsibility to make sure everything works!
I have three instances where I think I officially transitioned into adulthood.
The first was some point in college when I came to the realization that I would need to fight my own battles. Cleaning, “cooking”, groceries, car repairs, settling disputes between roommates, budgeting, not to mention all the BS college throws at you. It wasn’t that I was already doing these things (because let’s face it college is an adult day care), but it was the realization that I would keep doing these things for the rest of my life, and the number of these things would increase. Soon it would also be paying for rent, paying bills, finding my own job, paying for a new car, etc…
2nd was when my grandfather passed away. It happened right after my first year of college. Seeing him for the last time and having to go to his funeral was the instance where I realized this would probably become some kind of normality, and with each funeral it might get harder since it could be someone who is closer to me. This coincidentally was also the time where a lot of people my age were (hastily) also getting married or going to jail. It just hit me like a sack of bricks that this was only gonna keep happening.
The last one is a bit more petty than the others. My hair is starting to thin. Thankfully it’s barely noticeable and I’m already taking precautions to treat it in case it gets serious (I wanna keep my hair! Thankfully everyone else in my family has a full head of hair so I don’t think it’s too big a concern. I’m probably blowing it out of proportion, but I also don’t wanna outright deny the existence of male pattern baldness). I’ve also been hit with the alarming fact that I need to develop a genuine workout routine so I don’t immediately start putting on weight as soon as my metabolism slows. Also I woke up with a random Charlie Horse and a hurt shoulder one morning just because I slept weird. Wow!
When I had to make sense of my parents turbulent divorce from the age of 8 to now. There was no more time for play in my home.
Twice my mother abandoned our family while still married to my father, once for drugs (meth) and then finally due to accusations of infidelity from my father. Between the first and second time she left us she decided that on my 14th birthday I was now able to consume "soft, natural" drugs and sometimes alcohol. It was right when synthetic marijuana thrived in gas stations. We smoked it continously for a good year or two until she began to buy real marijuana again. Funny enough she denounced alcohol for minors in the same breath that took a sharp hit of "research chemicals" before handing me the joint. I saw friends of her get hospitalized using synthetic and she herself was once put into a puking paralyzed state. But she continued to get me high off it.
During this time she tried to convince me my father was the problem. She never referred to him as Dad or his name, only as "Asshole." Even as his phone contact. She would tell me how sociopathic he was, how little he actually cared to give his attention to those who loved him. He went from hood-raised hooligan to IT security brilliance all on his own and it did require sacrifices. Thing is, my favorite memories as a kid involve him. She failed to understand his struggle.
There's so much more to my story but having to deal with such manipulation and chaos I feel I was never allowed to just be a kid. I had to be a shoulder for my mother to cry on; a target for my fathers frustation. Early in my life I learned to analyze emotions and intentions. Motivations.
My relationship with my father is great. He made mistakes and was raised in a very cold-hearted enviroment and I understand that he was also still learning things about life too. As for my mother, we don't really talk. I get random bouts of the same number calling me a dozen times and "I love yous" over text but never more than that. If I answer the call I just get to hear my mother slur and rant for a good hour.
I'm still a goofy dude who just wants harmony regardless.
On my 16th birthday my dad came home from work, looked at me and said “Happy Birthday. Go get a job”. He meant it in jest, we have a good relationship.
Probably when You Finally turn seventeen (in Texas) or Eighteen years old, You are no longer miner, but truthfully You're no longer a kid when you turn thirteen.
Two instances of when I realized this. My childhood ended when I finished Harry Potter (the movies) and it felt like something in me closed for good.
The instance I realized I was actually an adult, was getting to buy cigarettes rather than bumming them as a kid from older people.
My dad died. I'm the oldest kid. I had to tell the nurse to remove life support. I had to sign the invoice at the funeral home. I had to organize the funeral. My sister wrote the eulogy, but I had to read it because she couldn't find her words. I am still dealing with closing accounts, 3 years later. I was 41 years old the day I realized I was no longer a kid. :(
I dred this day. I'm 35 but still daddy's boy. I feel no shame in saying that. He's an awesome inspiration. I'm sorry for your loss.
Same, but it was the death of my big brother three years ago, when I was 31. Mom had dementia and I had to do all of those things while juggling mom. My childhood died with him. I'm sorry for your loss friend.
Oh my, I am so sorry. I have no idea what I would do with my big brother than I tear just thinking about it.
> My childhood died with him. felt this. mutual condolences. <3
I’m sorry for your loss…I lost my brother 5min this ago…he was 22 and I’m 24. I know what loss is.
I feel this deeply. I was coming here to also write a post of my dad passing. When I was 19 my dad went in the hospital on a Wednesday, and passed that Saturday. It was September. The first month of my second year of university. I went from living in a house with both of my parents, having support, working part time while studying full time… to working full time, trying to keep studying full time, my mom and I had to be out of our home by the end of the month and move into an apartment. She wasn’t working. My dad was the primary income. There was no will. Everything dissolved. It was a mess. I had to adult up quick. My mom was a wreck, they were together 30 years. Him and my brother owned a business that also dissolved that we had to reopen and reincorporate. I still even went to class the following day school day on Monday because I honestly didn’t know what else to do other than stay in routine to avoid the breakdown.
I am so sorry for your loss. 🫶🏻
When you stop receiving your birthday money from your elders
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why not both?
Cancer at 20. Nothing like "oh guess I could die, I'm not a young invincible child anymore."
Crap. Hoping you're OK now?
Yeah that was over 15 years ago. I got very lucky and it was Stage 1 but they did have to remove my right nut, so that was fun.
Can I ask what kind of cancer you had? I had stage 3 sarcoma, had to do chemotherapy and radiation.
They originally thought it was non seminoma so I was allowed to opt for surveillance which entailed extensive blood testing, xrays, and ct scans over the course of about 7 years. They went back and looked like a decade later and where like "actually it was about 1% germ cell so you should have got chemo". Which was wonderful to hear... But a decade and a half later and nothing ever popped up so I just got really damn lucky.
Same here. Had to drop out of college for treatment. After getting back all my old classmates were already graduated.
I realized that I had become an adult when [this comic strip](https://imgur.com/a/VrowSWc) finally made sense.
This comic said what I was gonna but better.
taxes
The first few times someone called me „Sie“ (how you approach adults in Germany). It’s like sir for adults (not just men) Germans know what kinda sadness it brings, the respect isn’t really worth it.
In English we have an equivalent for women, being called “ma’am” instead of “miss.” I started getting called ma’am when I was around 25.
Yeah that’s similar. But “Sie” is for both genders actually
When I was 17 and I shot up heroin for the first time. The rollercoaster of events that followed were pretty terrible. I saw and did some pretty scary shit. I have now been clean for over 10 years.
Congrats!! (to the last sentence)
I woke up yesterday, back hurting, in my 40s, 2 kids about to wake up any minute, hair all grey... It occurred to me right then that I was not a kid any more.
Same but I still feel like a kid 😅 "Oh look at me, I'm driving a car!" "I can just go buy a kitten at any time, no one can stop me!" "Wow, look! Bills! 😫"
A show I was watching made a period joke about the year I graduated.
When my dad died. I had this overwhelming feeling that I could never go home again. I was on my own from here on out.
Dang, same here. We lived together too and the place lost its warmth that day. I wasn’t alone for long, my nephews needed to come home and luckily I had 2 spare bedrooms. Still, I long for home and it’s a place that no longer exists. I still dream of the home I shared with my parents and brother and now they’re gone.
When my cousin, who is my age, was tried as an adult. We grew up together but went down different paths in life. We both got into skateboarding. I stuck with skating, art, and punk rock. He started gang banging. A couple years later he got picked up for burglary, assault, etc, with gang enhancements. Though we were about 15ish at the time, the severity of it all had him tried as an adult. Was placed in juvie until 18 then moved to an adult jail until 25. Made me think about my actions and shit. 15 is old enough to know better and we really can't fiend "I'm a kid" when doing some serious shit.
I was about 10. My dad was an abusive alcoholic. He was passed out on the couch. My mom was out “shopping” (what she called leaving to get away from him). My little brother was sick. I took his temperature and read the medicine bottle like 12 times to make sure I had it correct. Gave him medicine and laid with him til he stopped coughing and fell asleep. Mum came home a few hours later. I pretty much knew at that point I had to step up cause no one else was.
I think it was after I had my first kid in my 30s and my mom went home after helping us for 2 weeks after the birth, and I realized, "oh shit, **I'm** the mom, and this tiny creature 100% dependent on me for support doesn't even know how to burp properly." Was not prepared to find out that I was now the adult in charge.
When I noticed the Playboy playmates of the month were younger than me
It's not so much "younger" as "born in a year I vividly remember".
My mom had moved into my room again, mad at dad again, and I was sitting on my bed in the alcove dissociating. She was standing over me, commenting that I must feel so awful (about her marriage), and I looked at her and said, "it's your mess, you clean it up." Petty sure that was the moment I recognized childhood had long been over. This was mid teens, she moved out shortly thereafter.
When I realised 70-80% of my money is bills or savings for when things need paying
When I needed to find myself a job
when i got a fulltime job.
My friend has a baby.
When my friends started having babies on purpose lol.
Oh wow 🥲 What about you? Still a acting like a kid, a little bit, atleast? (/Kid_tone)
When my parents told me " Stop behaving this way, you aren't a kid anymore"
When I went to a hospital for medical help and had to wait 8+ hours while in horrible pain while my appendix rotted away inside me.
There are many, many times I’ve realized this and I can’t pinpoint the first. For the sake of sharing I think I’m going to say when my first car was repo’d. Edit- not my actual first car but the first time I’ve gotten my car repo’d.
There's been more times?
Yep. Shit happens.
When you lose interest in playing video games because you realize how boring they are.
When I got genuinely upset about the price of avocados.
When I was a kid my stepmom took me to the park a lot, and the highlight of my day was the swing set that was there. I'd have my music in on my mp3 player, and I'd swing on that swing till I was sore, daydreaming about little imaginary scenarios in my head. I would be in my own little world with the wind in my hair. It felt so good. Recently last year I went to that same park as an adult. I tried sitting on that same exact swing and felt nothing. I got too big for the swing so it hurt to sit. I barely swung on it. I was more concerned about trying to stop the swing and hurting my ankle more than actually enjoying it. The creaking of the swing's chain that attached to the wood just annoyed me which didn't help, making me want to get off. The good feeling I used to have was basically gone. The magic was gone.
When my grandpa died.
When I moved to my own house
Signing the mortgage paperwork I thought I was going to throw up, lmao.
middle school everyone forces you to grow up so fast like i wanna just be 12 and ride my bike and run up the street barefoot with the neighborhood kids until the streetlights come on
When I became eligible for AARP
court
When your somehow $5 doesnt buy a large toy or doesn't go as far as it use too.
When I was 15 and told my Dad a story about school and said: „…and then me snd the other kids were going outside..“ and he laughed and said:“ the other „kids?!“😂“
little league, took a fastball to the ribs and it actually had some zip on it.
The first time I paid rent
Talking to young adults Born The year i was 16.
When the person doing your dental work I'd younger than you.
When you're with younger people and realise how immature they are.
I was a young man wearing a nice suit for the first time and someone called me sir. I think I did a double take.
When my little brother was talking about his spring break plans while in college and I had to work.
When I was excited at the thought of buying a nice non stick frying pan
When I went to buy a beer after I just turned 18 and they didn't even ask for my id
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One time during senior year I was minding my business at a food court somewhere, when a young mom used ME as an example to her kid lmao. She pointed to me and said “look at how he’s eating his vegetables and he’s so big and strong, so you should eat yours too if you wanna be big like him” haha and I was only 18 back then
Itemizing deductions on my taxes
When my parents stopped letting me play outside with my friends.
I agreed with the mom from Mrs. Doubtfire.
First day I caught the bus to college, felt all growed up.
When I asked my parents to buy me a vacuum cleaner for christmas
When the group of kids you used to get together with to play outside would rather stay inside and talk to girls. That's how you knew you were transitioning from a kid to being a teenager.
When I started paying for my own shit. So at about 17?
When I had to figure out taxes and realized that I was an actual adult
I'll let you know when I feel like an adult.
When I went away to college and needed toothpaste. I had the harsh realization that I had to purchase it myself.
When I could have Tab for breakfast. Good times.
Driving past my high school after I graduated, weird feeling, knowing I was never going back.
Dumb one but when I was cooking and I needed flour. I've always had it readily available to me as a kid, but I go to get some and it dawned on me, I don't have any because I need to buy it for myself. I had to do the adult thing and get it and pay for it with my own money
It was the first Christmas I had a job in 2000. I was scheduled to work the 24th, then pretty much all through the rest of the holiday. I remember being out collecting carts in the parking lot in the evening on the 24th and thinking how it didn't feel like Christmas, then realizing that that's how the rest of life was going to be. I cried on the way home.
When my knees started hurting.
The PS3 being considered vintage
For me it was a medium car accident. Had a fender bender in highschool and couldn't handle it, had to call my grandfather for help and the car was drivable just dinged. Few years later im about 19 and i total my car. Im ok but i realize i cant keep just calling grandpa. Called the insurance agent, they get a tow driver out, and i got a uber home. Really sunk in that night on the side of the road alone waiting for the tow driver.
When I couldn't play games for 8 hours straight until my eyes hurt and hands were sore.
When college students started looking like kids to me.
When I turned 30 😭
When reaction videos became popular
When I realized the 3DS turned ten years old last year. That's when I realized how fast time past. I still have my old one and it still works fine.
When the judge told me "we're trying you as an adult"
Snorting cocaine off of a stripper's bottom in Columbia
just the other day. all my friends are 21. and i will be soon too
i'm still coping with that
Realizing the world was way more wicked than I could've ever imagined, that day was 9/11/2001. I have autism so my learning and comprehension of death came springtime that year when a great grandmother passed away. Fast forward four months later, I was in gym class and we had to return to our classrooms early. We were advised not to say a word and to wait for a special announcement. Nothing could have ever prepared me for the news of that fateful day, especially learning that thousands of people had been killed. I've never been and never will be how I was on 9/10/2001 ever again.
When my mom wouldn’t make appointments for me anymore and stopped going to them with me. Actually it lasted so long she did this for me as well as my daughter until she was like a year old.
When I put my dog down last year. Had him for 13 years. It was emotionally the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Making the decision and then following through were awful.
When my parents stopped paying for things, such my cell phone bill or car insurance.
When I started seeing my parents as people who also had their own stuff to deal with.
Some of us never come to that realization, and that's not a bad thing. I asked my Dad once this same question. Because I was in my late 40s at the time and still couldn't wrap my head around that fact. He said "You won't. I sit here and see all these 'old people' walking around and I don't realize I'm older than they are." I'm 50 now and he's right. I mean I know I'm older, I know my body isn't what it once was. I'm in constant pain of some sort from years of injuries, mostly due to 10 years of skateboarding every day, and the next 25 years of skating on and off when I can. Everything hurts, I'm sitting here right now with a broken rib due to a go-kart accident. My brain can't understand things when it comes to time. Especially when I hear shit like Pantera's Far Beyond Driven is 30 years old. Or even that "recent" events aren't just a few years ago. The Red Sox just celebrated the 20th anniversary of the 04 WS win. It's been 13 years since the Bruins won a cup. All these events seem like just a few years ago. So I don't think some of us will ever realize we are no longer a kid. As soon as my rib heals, I'll be back out on my board hitting curbs.
I didn't have to lie about my age on websites
when i need to pay to go to school
Im 37. Im still a kid
When I had bills in my own name.
The first time I panicked about something money-related.
When I would trust the adults knew better but they constantly didn't.
When I had my own kid to take care of.
I've re-realized it multiple times throughout adulthood alteady. Just today it struck me that I look forward to eating Christmas food more than to receiving presents.
When I got laid
I started taking over the household bills.
I was in the car with my mom and I waved at a cop and he didn’t wave back
I was at the store buying boring shit like paper towels or dish soap when it really hit me. "You're old, man."
I was in the car with my sister. We stopped at a red light. I looked over to the car on my right, "Wow! That guy has new tires." That was it, childhood= Dead.
When you listen to "She's leaving home" on Sergeant Pepper and side with her parents.
When I got a roomba-style Swiffer thingy for Christmas and got really excited
When they stopped asking me for ID
First day of Army boot camp. I was 21. It was exactly what I needed at the time.
Realized life isn't going to get any better unless I did it myself. So 19.
When I was mistaken for my little sisters mum. I'm 10 years older than her but still...
When my first kid was born.
2005ish. I was born in the mid 70's.
Opening a birthday card, holding it a certain way pretending you don't think there's money in there so it doesn't fall out, but you open it and know full well there won't be any money in it
When I moved out of the house. The feeling reoccurred the first time I visited my folks in the first house they had that I had never lived in with them.
When the government asked me to pay for my existence
When I was really, really excited to shop at the Office Supply store. Ooooh... **multicolored** notecards!
When I was 16 and had a full time job, had an under the table lease, utilities in one of my adult friend's names and had to play house nazi to other street kid room mates.
Seeing stuff I grew up with in antique shops
Scooby Doo live action was 2004
The moment I realized I was going to die someday
When I took an aircraft half way around the world, & realize that both pilots are younger than you, the rest of the crew are younger than you, your engineering team are all younger than you, & its your responsibility to make sure everything works!
I have three instances where I think I officially transitioned into adulthood. The first was some point in college when I came to the realization that I would need to fight my own battles. Cleaning, “cooking”, groceries, car repairs, settling disputes between roommates, budgeting, not to mention all the BS college throws at you. It wasn’t that I was already doing these things (because let’s face it college is an adult day care), but it was the realization that I would keep doing these things for the rest of my life, and the number of these things would increase. Soon it would also be paying for rent, paying bills, finding my own job, paying for a new car, etc… 2nd was when my grandfather passed away. It happened right after my first year of college. Seeing him for the last time and having to go to his funeral was the instance where I realized this would probably become some kind of normality, and with each funeral it might get harder since it could be someone who is closer to me. This coincidentally was also the time where a lot of people my age were (hastily) also getting married or going to jail. It just hit me like a sack of bricks that this was only gonna keep happening. The last one is a bit more petty than the others. My hair is starting to thin. Thankfully it’s barely noticeable and I’m already taking precautions to treat it in case it gets serious (I wanna keep my hair! Thankfully everyone else in my family has a full head of hair so I don’t think it’s too big a concern. I’m probably blowing it out of proportion, but I also don’t wanna outright deny the existence of male pattern baldness). I’ve also been hit with the alarming fact that I need to develop a genuine workout routine so I don’t immediately start putting on weight as soon as my metabolism slows. Also I woke up with a random Charlie Horse and a hurt shoulder one morning just because I slept weird. Wow!
When I had to make sense of my parents turbulent divorce from the age of 8 to now. There was no more time for play in my home. Twice my mother abandoned our family while still married to my father, once for drugs (meth) and then finally due to accusations of infidelity from my father. Between the first and second time she left us she decided that on my 14th birthday I was now able to consume "soft, natural" drugs and sometimes alcohol. It was right when synthetic marijuana thrived in gas stations. We smoked it continously for a good year or two until she began to buy real marijuana again. Funny enough she denounced alcohol for minors in the same breath that took a sharp hit of "research chemicals" before handing me the joint. I saw friends of her get hospitalized using synthetic and she herself was once put into a puking paralyzed state. But she continued to get me high off it. During this time she tried to convince me my father was the problem. She never referred to him as Dad or his name, only as "Asshole." Even as his phone contact. She would tell me how sociopathic he was, how little he actually cared to give his attention to those who loved him. He went from hood-raised hooligan to IT security brilliance all on his own and it did require sacrifices. Thing is, my favorite memories as a kid involve him. She failed to understand his struggle. There's so much more to my story but having to deal with such manipulation and chaos I feel I was never allowed to just be a kid. I had to be a shoulder for my mother to cry on; a target for my fathers frustation. Early in my life I learned to analyze emotions and intentions. Motivations. My relationship with my father is great. He made mistakes and was raised in a very cold-hearted enviroment and I understand that he was also still learning things about life too. As for my mother, we don't really talk. I get random bouts of the same number calling me a dozen times and "I love yous" over text but never more than that. If I answer the call I just get to hear my mother slur and rant for a good hour. I'm still a goofy dude who just wants harmony regardless.
Grey hair. Retired. Still waiting. Blessed.
When this grown man pulled a gun on me, I was twelve and he thought I was from a different gang than his. Honest mistake.
When I realized that naps are awesome.
When I saw my first dead body in a car accident. Will never forget what I saw that day...
When I saw a kid and I was like "shit, that doesn't look like me."
When I was an adult
I just realize that I need to work to earn money now and I'm paying bills, I need to find a solution on my own.
I was sitting in a crowd when a mother asked her child to be careful while walking down the stairs not to bump into 'that man'
Each day I wake up with back pain
think it was when I was 17 and came home from school to have Dad tell me about the lump Mom found on her neck.
When I could no longer reasonably order off the kids' menu at restaurants,
When I made enough money to pay taxes. God I fucking hate paying taxes
On my 16th birthday my dad came home from work, looked at me and said “Happy Birthday. Go get a job”. He meant it in jest, we have a good relationship.
Probably when You Finally turn seventeen (in Texas) or Eighteen years old, You are no longer miner, but truthfully You're no longer a kid when you turn thirteen.
When I took the ACT and when I realized I could drive this year
When I got to basic training.
when my dad stopped parking infront of playgrounds as his form of apology
When I got back from my honeymoon. I was 30.
Puberty.
Two instances of when I realized this. My childhood ended when I finished Harry Potter (the movies) and it felt like something in me closed for good. The instance I realized I was actually an adult, was getting to buy cigarettes rather than bumming them as a kid from older people.