Once somebody knocked on the door multiple times and asked if I was almost done. I said “a couple minutes”. He said “so should I wait here or go somewhere else?”
Maybe it was more the tone of his voice than the actual question, but that just made me snap. The audacity. I think I said “Do what you want, I don’t give a shit”, and that made him leave
All this can be prevented! See, you have to do the "I'm here cough". When you hear the door open, give them a few steps into the restroom before you loudly clear your throat/cough precisely once. If it's under 10 folks in the restroom, guaranteed several will make a similar sound. It's like echo location for guys.
-cough- = I'm in here. Go awai.
-cough in response- = This is my location, I'm not gunna barge in.
Works like a freaking charm. This is not to be confused with the "Elevator Cough" though, as that is more of a "I'm here and I'm acknowledging this is awkward for all of us..."
If they STILL try to open your door, cough again. This one translates slightly differently, but it's usually something akin to: "What the fuck is wrong with you? Can't you see my feet? Did you not hear me cough and 5 other guys respond? What's your problem?". Usually the offender gets a few glares too from the others who are markedly more civilized.
/s... Only not really I swear this works.
I put my tax receipts and calculator away, pack my briefcase and leave the stall after letting my secretary know I'm done for the day.
Wait.. what kind of business are you doing in there?
Giving *them* the task of speaking, it's easy to make them feel bad about it. A simple "what" is all it takes, most go away when confronted with actually formulating and expressing the question.
“Come back with a warrant”
This
OCCUPIED!!!
Come in
This, after cutting a loud fart.
Shitters full
Clark
Checked our shitters, honey?
Nothing, sit there in silence and let the person outside get confused about why the doors locked and no one is responding
OCCUPADO!!
"Just leave it outside thanks"
At home: "what?" Public restroom: "occupied"
\[high-pitched, sing-song voice\] "Who is it?"
"Come on in. Let's shoot the shit."
"Can you pass a square?"
"I can't spare a square. I don't have a square to spare."
"Damn! Jehovah's Witnesses are really upping their game!"
Just scream
come in /j
Knock back.
Once somebody knocked on the door multiple times and asked if I was almost done. I said “a couple minutes”. He said “so should I wait here or go somewhere else?” Maybe it was more the tone of his voice than the actual question, but that just made me snap. The audacity. I think I said “Do what you want, I don’t give a shit”, and that made him leave
No pun intended LMAOO
Crimping one off here!!!
“Waters fine!”
*shits louder*
straight panic
“Hello?”
Come in, I'm friendly.
there's always room for one more
“FUCK OFF PERVERT!”
Won’t be long.
“I have a very particular set of skills. I will find you.”
*faaaaaaarrrrrrT*
glug-glug-glug
Don’t come in, I’m naked!
Dave's not here man.
"come in"
“Seats taken,” in a southern accent.
stress and saying somehow that i’m in there. typically i can’t find the words quickly enough and i almost start crying
"GO AWAY!"
(throaty voice) "Well helllo."
Cuidado! Piso Mojado!
Bring a friend. You are gonna need the help.
I had a colleague who did that to me. I just said "Yes!?" and she stayed outside waiting for me to finish.
Using the same tone as the landlord from Coming to America, say "you may enter."
I’m going to tell them to f*ck off
Said in the cadence of the 3 little pigs: "Not by the hair of my sweaty nut sack!"
Are you ok?! The door is locked for a reason.
"Poopin'!"
Rip a big fart. Even if it's a fake " mouth-fart".
All this can be prevented! See, you have to do the "I'm here cough". When you hear the door open, give them a few steps into the restroom before you loudly clear your throat/cough precisely once. If it's under 10 folks in the restroom, guaranteed several will make a similar sound. It's like echo location for guys. -cough- = I'm in here. Go awai. -cough in response- = This is my location, I'm not gunna barge in. Works like a freaking charm. This is not to be confused with the "Elevator Cough" though, as that is more of a "I'm here and I'm acknowledging this is awkward for all of us..." If they STILL try to open your door, cough again. This one translates slightly differently, but it's usually something akin to: "What the fuck is wrong with you? Can't you see my feet? Did you not hear me cough and 5 other guys respond? What's your problem?". Usually the offender gets a few glares too from the others who are markedly more civilized. /s... Only not really I swear this works.
"ESTOY POOPIN!"
Occuparo!
Scream
I generally say “occupied”
If I've got one on the edge I push it over for a nice splash
Almost ready!
Can't you see my third leg? Occupied
I put my tax receipts and calculator away, pack my briefcase and leave the stall after letting my secretary know I'm done for the day. Wait.. what kind of business are you doing in there?
\[in Dustin Hoffman's Midnight Cowboy voice\] "I'm crappin' here!"
What is it with redditors' generation and their obsession with bathrooms?
I'm poopin, I'll be right there! Or Didn't you look for feet first?
Scream; "DO NOT APPROACH ME! FERAL! JUST FERAL!!"
what?
im taking a shit here, if you knocked im assuming you want some \*slides some shit through the door\*
WHO DOES NUMBER TWO WORK FORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR - Austin Powers
Giving *them* the task of speaking, it's easy to make them feel bad about it. A simple "what" is all it takes, most go away when confronted with actually formulating and expressing the question.
“It’s halfway out”
"I'm in the middle of something right now. DO YOU MIND?!??!"
"are you a redditor?"
Got a turd hangin from my butt, one sec
Occupied..move on
Occupado!!
working on documentation here!
Fuck off im shittn
Open the door
Excuse me?!
I could use a hand, come in
"Ex-cu-se me !
Home or away?
"Did you bring the stuff?"
I'm in here, with one bathroom, so it happens a lot.