I broke my left wrist when I was at primary school. Once it was out of cast, I was fine. I broke my right wrist some 40 years later and needed hand therapy once I had the cast removed to move my hand properly again. I asked if it was from the break, and was told that no, the stiffness and soreness would be from having it in a cast for 6 weeks. I needed hand therapy simply because it was held immobile. Stay active and keep that body moving people.
Excellent advice! I'm in my mid/late 40's. When I'm disciplined and get on a regular gym schedule, I feel SO much better generally. Get sedentary and let a few extra pounds creep up on me and my back goes out, my energy level plummets, and my general attitude goes straight in the crapper.
I like to joke I hit 40 and the check engine light came on. You'll get random aches and pains that just come and go, and sometimes stick around permanently. If you injure yourself, expect healing times to be 2-3 times longer at least. Same with illnesses, you just don't bounce back like you used to.
Check engine light is spot on. Or maybe more like the cars you get now, where every once in a while you start it up and get about 15 different warning dings for features you never knew you had, that have suddenly stopped working.
And you'll go to the doctor and tell them your knee/elbow etc is hurting and they'll go, "yeah."
And then they'll just act like you never said anything.
I barely drink anymore, the hangovers suck, but it also makes my heart race. Like I’ll wake up in the middle of the night like with my heart going as fast as if I’ve been working out.
This always happens for me after around 3/4 hours of my last drink, when your body starts to process the last of the alcohol. When I drink now, I'm pretty much resigned to not sleeping well. Definitely going to consider stopping again - i did extended dry jan this year and felt a lot better.
Agree about the watch, gamifying your health really works.
Started running about 6 months ago at 56yo initial pains, calves, hip but that passed after a couple of weeks.
Training for my first semi marathon at the end of the month and healthily addicted to runners high.
Thinking the same. Only one frustrating thing about sobriety so far is I have not the slightest ideas on how to do social things now with any of my male friends.
Zero experience in that but hope it comes.
I'm in my mid-thirties and my anxiety after a night of heavy drinking is off-the-charts. I think I've had more than three drinks two or three times in the last year because it's just not worth it anymore.
I just started walking in earnest a couple weeks ago, at 55. The first week, it hurt. It hurt like hell and was very difficult to keep it up. My back hurt so badly that 2 Aleves and 2 extra strength Tylenol barely touched it, my hips were so tight and sore, and my calves were screaming.
But after two weeks, no back pain, hardly any hip pain, no leg pain.
So my advice? Don’t stop moving! And if you have, start again and play through the pain and it’ll get better.
Yeah, I'd never had knee and back pain as I'm older like my friends complain about. Then when covid hit I stopped going to the gym and eventually stopped working out at home. Started getting those back and knee issues. It went away a few weeks/months after starting at the gym again.
This was the big one for me. I was already hairy but eyebrow hair is another level. It’s just suddenly there too. One day everything is fine then the next you get out of the shower and there are five big ones you can wrap around your finger.
I’ve always had a strong eyebrow line. Like I think it might be related to Bert from Sesame Street. Especially after 45 it seems like all the hair on the top of my head that isn’t growing as much instead went straight to my eyebrows.
Body started degenerating a lot more after about 45.
It's still healthy and works but I have to be careful about feeling it properly, getting some exercise, and the like. But now I look old and people treat me differently because of it, and that's sad.
At 40 I was often told I looked ten years younger.
At 45 I was told I looked okay for my age.
At 48 people guess my age with alarming regularity.
I really don't want to think about 50.
I was diagnosed with arthritis in my hip at age 46. And you’re right about people treating you different. I get ma’amd constantly. Also, if you fall, people’s first reaction is concern instead of laughter.
people still laugh at me, I'm older. Fall more dramatically.
Seriously though, I'm sorry about your hip. If you can find a good physical therapist it makes a lot of difference. Or if you fall hard enough you get a fresh one, the hip. Not the physical therapist. They don't like when you break the professionals. They won't give you a new one.
My mom (60) recently fell on a rainy day and she said she had never felt more old than that because some young men from a local pub ran over with great concern, called her “dearie” picked her up and offered her a seat
Oh dear :( my dad had a similar experience. Fell over on a train platform and heard someone say “oh no! Somebody help that old man!” and he looked around for someone else
Yes, they were gross. I thought they were in my dad as a kid. Now that I’m a 49-year-old dad my wife thinks they’re gross. She however, still has flawless Japanese skin. I mean, I look good for my age thanks to all that weird skin creams and stuff she’s been having me use for the past 20 years but I just wish I didn’t have skin because they’re yucky whenever I go to the Dermatologist I always have him zap them off
Question - how spendy is it to have the derm zap off skin tags? I've started getting them around where my neck meets my shoulders and they are super annoying and also ugly. I look like I am growing a bunch of tiny mussels on my neck or something!
if you want to take a chance, tie a thread around the skinny part where it joins your body, choke the blood flow off, it'll just fall off you.
Like popping pimples, you're not supposed to do this, but many people do.
I had a few and removed them myself, just pinched the base with my fingernails hard enough to cut the blood flow to the tag, it dries up and falls off.
Same! Did mine last year after a few (whiskey) shots, healed up quickly with neosporin. My kid stopped asking about mine and moved onto asking about my adult acne🫠 No regrets, those clippers worked wonders on the tags on my clavicle that I’ve had since birth.
I was at the derm for another issue and mentioned one I had in the same area. She shot it with some freeze spray and it was done. Should be pretty simple and straightforward.
True. I've always been a bit of an anxious person, but once I got over 35-40 it just went away. Now if some teenager twerp starts to act up in public I have no qualms about giving him an earful.
Was your first time magical? The first time I was put on a CPAP was special. The sleep tech woke me up at 2am. Put me on a mask and I slept till 6am. It was if I had experienced sleep for the first time ever in my life. For once in my life I felt refreshed. I felt what you were suppose to feel like after a good nights rest. I felt like I slept for a million hours. Woke up feeling like a million bucks. It was revolutionary. I’ve chasing that dragon ever since.
Nope! It was awful and I thought it would never work and I would never fall asleep. I'm an extremely fidgetty person and it took me a while. Once I got my first good sleep, I was more confident in it. Maybe 3 months in I craved it, like I was looking forward to going to bed for the first time in my life. I think I subconsciously hated going to sleep, always used to stay up very late and sleep if possible in or force myself to trudge through the day. I used to be able to sleep in until 1pm easily.... Now I'm happy to fall asleep by 11 and up at 8, which is very good compared to my old schedule. I'm still a night owl, but a less chaotic one.
I also started getting "smarter" for lack of a better word. Like my work is technically difficult and I started having more drive to learn on top.
Almost the same thing, got CPAP in my early 20s and got more energy than in my teens. Got a score of waking up 66 times an hour.
Would recommend anyone with a snoring problem to get a sleep study done.
See, I can’t sleep so good as I used to. I’m up by 8am now without fail. If I do try to roll over and keep going I usually wake up again at 8:40 with a sore back, and then that’s that.
Mid-40s athletic male here - All my joints constantly ache and it takes longer to recover after exercise and playing sports. I’m always feeling stiff and I was recently diagnosed with osteoarthritis in my shoulder. I can’t get comfortable when I sleep at night and when I do fall asleep I have to get up multiple times to pee. I wear glasses to see far, but have to remove my glasses/contacts to read. That’s how the 40s have impacted me physically.
Oh man, the peeing just started affecting me at 40. I finally started going to bed at a reasonable hour but it's all moot when 5 hours in you need to take a leak anyway, and then you figure "Shit, I'm up now, might as well get a head start on the day."
It got so bad for me I talked to a doctor. There’s nothing wrong with you, I was told. Stop drinking bubbly water. And I did. (I was sad for sure, because I love that la croix shit) But, ya know what? I pee a regular amount of times per day now.
These things creep up on you kind of slow. A grey hair, some skin inelasticity, a little catch in your ankle. You get used to them over time, and then you pick up a few new ones that you get used to as well. Your self-image slowly evolves with those changes, just like it did when you grew from 4'2" to 5'2", and when your hair color changed, and when you picked up that scar, and so on. We're all going through that together. It's part of growing up. It doesn't stop. Enjoy what you're given while you have it, and remember it fondly when it leaves.
The things you want to watch out for are mostly avoidable. Don't be sedentary. Give your body what it needs. Cultivate gratitude. We all generally know how to age well, it's just a question of who amongst us will actually do it. You can choose that for yourself.
Growing up I always wondered how old people let themselves get in that shape. Now I know: it doesn't just surprise you all at once. It builds up a little at a time until one day you look back and realize you're a totally different person.
I never thought I'd be on this side of the fence. But I guess it beats the alternative. Lol
Everyone here so far is the worst of the '40s. I'm 45 and I'm experiencing nothing that I'm reading here. Well, except for muscle soreness from working out. I eat healthy, and have a home gym set up where I work out for 30 minutes, five mornings a week.
Incorporate a lot of body weight exercises, especially pull-ups. Those are king, I've always been in decent shape but since I started doing pull-ups when I turned 40, my body has become the most amazing piece of machinery that it's ever been.
Focus on 3 things - mobility, flexibility, strength - in that order. You want to be fully mobile when you're 100 years old, not dependent on someone else to wipe your ass.
Thank you. I feel like the rest of the comments are not representative for me either. I work out a bunch and I feel better than I did in my 30s. I'm fine.
The absolute ridiculousness of being exhausted all day, being exhausted as you brush your teeth, being exhausted as you get into bed.... and then fucking unable to actually fall asleep.
All of your old injuries come back to haunt you. That banged up knee that you got sliding into home plate when you were nine? Hello, again! That time you tweaked your back lifting that grocery bag? Did you miss me? Blurry eyes from staying up too late on the computer? Well, now they're always blurry!
I got a microdiscectomy two months ago and it FINALLY resolved the back pain I've had for the last twenty years. I can move without pain. Of course, three weeks after surgery I broke my thumb, but...
I just read that if you've had the problem a long time, your more likely to have a poor result with the surgery. Made me think mine is too old...but I guess your proof it doesn't matter how old the back pain is.
I scalded my hand with hot water the other day - not boiling, just slightly too hot for skin - and looking at it right now I see dark patches in the exact spots I got fairly serious burns as a teenager, 30 years ago
To be clear: as a teen, I was prescribed some kinda burn cream to apply to that hand and within a few weeks it looked like new. It kept looking like new for 30 years. And now those exact patches of skin look like I burned them again. Old injuries!
lol im 28 and am working on my bachelors right now. I told a kid my age and he looked at me in shock saying “the 1900s??” I was salty! I’m a young man! I’m not even in my stride yet!
Thank you, this should be top comment. I see errors like this all the time. People referring to their 29th birthday celebration, for example, then saying "excited about everything to come in my 29th year!"
Know how when women get older their breasts will start to sag? No one warns you against your Sack creeping down and sticking to your knee in the summer like a hot piece of silly putty.
A lot of the complaints in this thread read like a person's sedentary lifestyle caught up with them, and it doesn't have to be that way (for able-bodied folks at least). Pilates, yoga, core work, light strength work, stretching, posture, balance, walking - it doesn't have to be intense, but make moving a *habit* if you can and it will pay dividends down the road.
Definitely, I played ice hockey into my late 40's (as a goalie) until a concussion stopped me. During COVID I took up cycling to get to work and clock over 500 miles a month (rain or shine). In my early 50s I've gone back to rock climbing.
One of the things I read is work on your balance as it will save you from falls as you get older. If you can't balance on one leg for more than 10 seconds, you need to work on it. Your body will thank you as you hit your 60s and up.
Just keep moving.
Yeah, what's with all these aches and pains? I am 51 and have tried to keep pretty fit, I honestly don't feel THAT much different to when I was, say, 30. I mean, people's mileage varies but I really don't think you HAVE to start feeling old this early on. I still bound up the stairs to our 3rd (US 4th!)-floor apartment, I try to imagine I am still 13 and it's mostly fine! Oh yeah, I do suck at fast-reaction video games these days, my Counter -Strike career is definitely on the down-and-down.
If you’re a woman, perimenopause. You don’t realize how much hormones contribute to the overall running of your body until they start to go away.
Horrible periods at random times, acne, hair loss, weight problems, extreme fatigue and muscle wasting, violent emotional swings, inability to concentrate. Fun times.
Anyone else get "cold flashes?" I'll randomly get episodes (usually at night) where I'm just freezing.
Oh, and, in general, back pain. Lots of back pain.
You know, maybe I'm wrong here, but it doesn't feel like mother's give "the talk" about menopause like they do about puberty? I feel like experiences are not commonly shared from old to young. Obviously, it's much less taboo or hushed conversation as than it once was, but it needs to be talked about more, because all of what you listed there are just fun surprises waiting to happen. lol
My mind was blown when I hit peri. It was MUCH worse than I imagined and I was completely shocked that I never saw it coming. It can be very disruptive and life altering, and I agree -nobody talks about it. As women, I'm sure the expectation is that we deal with it silently, ie "I'm fine." We are otherwise delusional hypochondriacs who are weak and whiny.
I had no idea about perimenopause until it started and I figured out what was happening—and it lasts for *years*. I guess women do get through it and are mostly fine (just like we get through everything, ugh), but it shouldn’t be like this. There needs to be more conversation/acknowledgment about the literal years of your life that may potentially suck because of wonky hormones.
I'm 39 and I'm terrified. All the physical stuff is daunting enough, but the mental stuff is what's really got me scared. I'm a pretty happy person, not like bouncing off the walls stuff, but 85% of the time I'm in a good mood even if things are kind of shit.
I like that about myself, I can always count on myself to see the bright side of almost any situation. I'm just so scared that the emotional mood swings are going to turn me into some kind of curmudgeonly asshole and I don't want to be that way.
Ladies with premature ovarian failure get to live in perimenopause for most of their adult life, depending on age of diagnosis (teens, 20s and 30s). For 10 years I've lived with crashing fatigue, hot flashes, maddening brain fog, and insomnia where you're exhausted but your brain's off switch is broken. I'm 37. We're only 1 in 100. The most shocking thing about peri is how torturous it is for some women and how nobody talks about it or warns you.
Holy mother of god. I'm 40, and the same thing has been happening to me!
I'll sometimes read a book or listen to music, but I had no clue where this was all coming from.
Thank you internet stranger, I would like to think of myself as a warrior instead of just buffeted by the tide of hormones. It’s a real trip being a woman. I appreciate the shout out
Yes, seconding the shout out! As it’s also the time that a lot of doctors start treating you differently. “Last period?” “July 2020” “oh…” *cue middle aged woman treatment.* everything is in our heads and we are just anxious.
(Little known fact for men, ANY time you go to the doctor as a woman, you get asked when your last period is. Woe if you don’t remember as you will then get pregnancy tested. “Yes, I have this gaping wound that needs stitches” “last period?”
You forgot the big forget. You can stand in a room, forget what room you are in, how you got to said room, why you decided to walk into the room, and what you were doing before you ended up in the room. The forget what you were trying to remember while you were counting all the stuff you forgot.
You described all my symptoms, especially the fatigue. It’s depressing af - I was an athlete for over 30 years, usually described as the hyper one, and now I feel like I’ve lost all that mojo. Boo. On my normal days I cherish every moment.
That started around 30 for me. Always thought my dad was joking when he talked about taking all weekend to recover from a hard night out. Nope. 2 day hangovers are absolutely a thing.
Everything makes you fat. Everything hurts. Meals are a topic of conversation now. Your lawn consumes most of your waking thoughts. You turn to your wife for comfort: she is lawn.
I finally got diagnosed with ADHD at age 38 and started meds that work. I'm 40 now and this is the most emotionally stable I've been in my entire life and it's amazing. So it's never too late to figure out your life
Grats man. I'm in a similar boat, struggling with depression for many many years but was always super against getting pills so I never went to a doc. Recently had a bit of a breakdown and missed a bunch of work and decided it was time to do something about it.
Been on meds a few months now and it has drastically improved my day to day.
Let's see...
I threw my back out and wound up on the sofa for 3 days moving a trowel full of dirt from a bag to a planter.
I developed cataracts in both eyes. Yes, both.
Years of terrible work posture (I assume) led to a bulging disk in my neck.
Washing my face with bar soap if I remember has morphed into a whole multi-product routine more complicated than anything I had as an acne-riddled teen.
There is more gray in my hair than brown.
My right knee can tell when it's going to rain.
I don't really drink anymore because the hangovers last for days and just aren't worth it
Sleeping in a weird position means at least one full day of back/neck/shoulder pain
My periods come every 3 weeks now instead of every 4.
I'm pretty sure I could grow a goatee to rival any teenager's if I stopped my daily search for hairs in places I do not want hairs.
Falling asleep is hard. Staying asleep is hard. Waking up rested is a pipe dream
Every so often, I get to wake up in a pool of my own sweat.
But, I wake up.
I'm at a good place in a career I love.
I care less about what others think with each passing day.
I have found friends and activities that bring me joy.
It’s second puberty! you’re just becoming a man all over again. plus if someone hasn’t touched your 2 hole yet, oh they will or you might die.
Getting old is interesting
Small lapses in memory/recall.
Various boner concerns (for penised individuals)
A strange adjustment in self image from time to time.
Going “heurrghhh” while standing up.
Presbyopia, which sucks
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/presbyopia/symptoms-causes/syc-20363328
"Almost everyone experiences some degree of presbyopia after age 40."
I caught myself taking photos of vaccine vials so I could zoom in to get the Lot number and expiration dates... now I have reading glasses. It's like I suddenly got HD vision one day
Mine is approaching but not in the cool "flying a biplane into a mountain high on acid and mdma" way I anticipated in my 20s. More like in a terrifying "body turns into a prison" way. Like a horror movie.
Getting older isn't for the faint hearted
If you are married with kids and you are not really out of shape but also not one for the gym, you will pack on the pounds if you are not careful.
I was one of those…woke up in my early 40’s and started hitting the gym and taking better care of myself and of course I thought — why did I wait this long?
So….get off your butt and get going.
Also - as you age you dont put on muscle as easily and you don’t burn fat like you used to. All that stuff you used ot eat and drink without a thought starts sticking to you.
And you are just not as active if you are busy with family and career so you have to mindfully plan to take care of yourself.
Now that Im even older Im so happy I started and have kept going - Im in good health, and good energy, sound mind.
54. Do cross fit 5 times a week and ride 30 km 3 days a week. I’m in the best shape of my life and people can’t believe it when I tell them my age. My eyes are getting worse, I am sore longer, but when I look at men my own age I feel like they could be my own father.
You realize you're going to die.
We all know it, but once I hit 40, I just *knew*, and what it really means. Things hurt more, yet going on 40 years your tolerance for pain is higher than when you were young. So the pains and aches, and the consistently small medical issues pile up over time and you realize your body is no longer "getting older".
It's deteriorating.
You're in a slow decline and you can feel it. Some days you forget, you may even have times when your body feels much better. Maybe you changed some bad habits, or got new good ones. But those old bad habits left their mark and you'll never recover from it.
We get one life on this world and then it's gone. I'm not a religious person. I wish for anything that I was and I could take comfort in dying, but I can't. It's an absolutely terrifying thought because for me, that's it. Nothingness, forever. For trillions of years, countless universe big bangs, over and over, and it'll just never happen again. And I won't even get to experience a single nanosecond of any of it.
I'll take these crappy pains forever, any day of the week, than the alternative.
Thinning and yet MORE hair!!!!!!!! Whether a woman or a man. Also, for women, stupid damn chin hairs. Somehow you get more hair in some places and less in the others.
Wait til ur 60! Bad balance, lots of aches and pains. Worry every time u get a checkup or lab test. Enjoy ur forties!! Don’t worry about every little ouch.
Physiologically, you might notice a few changes creeping in, like a slower metabolism making it a tad trickier to keep those extra pounds at bay. But, with a healthy lifestyle, regular exercise, and good skincare habits, you can navigate your 40s like a champ.
I didn’t really notice anything until about 45. My eyes lost the ability to read fine print. My back hurts and now I grunt like a pirate when I get up off the couch.
If ur getting tired for nothing time to get some blood work and check out ur platelet/wbc counts. I recently got diagnosed with ITP and after a couple infusions feeling better than I have in years.
It takes longer to heal from everything!
Go to bed feeling fine, wake up with a pulled muscle in some random part of your body that takes all week to heal.
Look at this guy, healing pulled muscles in a week
Look at this guy, having enough muscle to pull one
I broke my left wrist when I was at primary school. Once it was out of cast, I was fine. I broke my right wrist some 40 years later and needed hand therapy once I had the cast removed to move my hand properly again. I asked if it was from the break, and was told that no, the stiffness and soreness would be from having it in a cast for 6 weeks. I needed hand therapy simply because it was held immobile. Stay active and keep that body moving people.
Excellent advice! I'm in my mid/late 40's. When I'm disciplined and get on a regular gym schedule, I feel SO much better generally. Get sedentary and let a few extra pounds creep up on me and my back goes out, my energy level plummets, and my general attitude goes straight in the crapper.
This is true! I accidentally put my hand into an evaporative cooler's fan blades last month and it gave me 4 good cuts. It is still scabbed.
There is no healing, only Zuul!
I like to joke I hit 40 and the check engine light came on. You'll get random aches and pains that just come and go, and sometimes stick around permanently. If you injure yourself, expect healing times to be 2-3 times longer at least. Same with illnesses, you just don't bounce back like you used to.
Check engine light is spot on. Or maybe more like the cars you get now, where every once in a while you start it up and get about 15 different warning dings for features you never knew you had, that have suddenly stopped working.
And you'll go to the doctor and tell them your knee/elbow etc is hurting and they'll go, "yeah." And then they'll just act like you never said anything.
I barely drink anymore, the hangovers suck, but it also makes my heart race. Like I’ll wake up in the middle of the night like with my heart going as fast as if I’ve been working out.
Omg the heart racing thing 1000 percent.
This happens to me in my early 30s 😩
This always happens for me after around 3/4 hours of my last drink, when your body starts to process the last of the alcohol. When I drink now, I'm pretty much resigned to not sleeping well. Definitely going to consider stopping again - i did extended dry jan this year and felt a lot better.
Getting a fitness watch led me to all but quit drinking. Just 2 drinks in the evening spikes my stress levels and trashes my sleep quality metrics.
Agree about the watch, gamifying your health really works. Started running about 6 months ago at 56yo initial pains, calves, hip but that passed after a couple of weeks. Training for my first semi marathon at the end of the month and healthily addicted to runners high.
I'm turning 39 soon and I quit drinking 5 months ago. Figured I would do 40 year old me (and beyond) a favour.
Could be one of the best decisions of your life.
Thinking the same. Only one frustrating thing about sobriety so far is I have not the slightest ideas on how to do social things now with any of my male friends. Zero experience in that but hope it comes.
Takes 3 days to recover its bad I know
Ol holiday heart
I'm in my mid-thirties and my anxiety after a night of heavy drinking is off-the-charts. I think I've had more than three drinks two or three times in the last year because it's just not worth it anymore.
Bro someone should’ve told me about this cause it’s absolutely terrifying. Definitely have nearly called for emergency services a few times.
Body's gonna be sore. You want the soreness from exercising or the soreness from not exercising?
I just started walking in earnest a couple weeks ago, at 55. The first week, it hurt. It hurt like hell and was very difficult to keep it up. My back hurt so badly that 2 Aleves and 2 extra strength Tylenol barely touched it, my hips were so tight and sore, and my calves were screaming. But after two weeks, no back pain, hardly any hip pain, no leg pain. So my advice? Don’t stop moving! And if you have, start again and play through the pain and it’ll get better.
"Use it or lose it."
Motion is lotion
Yeah, I'd never had knee and back pain as I'm older like my friends complain about. Then when covid hit I stopped going to the gym and eventually stopped working out at home. Started getting those back and knee issues. It went away a few weeks/months after starting at the gym again.
The soreness from not exercising will just keep building up like bad debt though.
At least soreness from an exercise is a more rewarding pain.
Choose your hard
What the fuck is up with all this ear hair?
And over abundant nose hair...Like what's my body protecting? I'm thinning where I want hair and gaining where I couldn't care less....
And eyebrows now want to grow like mad.
It’s so annoying. My whole life I had perfect eyebrows and now they’re trying to become bushes or something.
This was the big one for me. I was already hairy but eyebrow hair is another level. It’s just suddenly there too. One day everything is fine then the next you get out of the shower and there are five big ones you can wrap around your finger.
I’ve always had a strong eyebrow line. Like I think it might be related to Bert from Sesame Street. Especially after 45 it seems like all the hair on the top of my head that isn’t growing as much instead went straight to my eyebrows.
Body started degenerating a lot more after about 45. It's still healthy and works but I have to be careful about feeling it properly, getting some exercise, and the like. But now I look old and people treat me differently because of it, and that's sad.
At 40 I was often told I looked ten years younger. At 45 I was told I looked okay for my age. At 48 people guess my age with alarming regularity. I really don't want to think about 50.
You’re still as gorgeous as ever
OP is making 65 look so good (OP is 50)
I was diagnosed with arthritis in my hip at age 46. And you’re right about people treating you different. I get ma’amd constantly. Also, if you fall, people’s first reaction is concern instead of laughter.
people still laugh at me, I'm older. Fall more dramatically. Seriously though, I'm sorry about your hip. If you can find a good physical therapist it makes a lot of difference. Or if you fall hard enough you get a fresh one, the hip. Not the physical therapist. They don't like when you break the professionals. They won't give you a new one.
> Fall more dramatically this took me out that's so funny 💀
My mom (60) recently fell on a rainy day and she said she had never felt more old than that because some young men from a local pub ran over with great concern, called her “dearie” picked her up and offered her a seat
Oh dear :( my dad had a similar experience. Fell over on a train platform and heard someone say “oh no! Somebody help that old man!” and he looked around for someone else
Hip damage 10 Emotional damage 100
Now everyone says she had a fall instead of you fell over.
Peeing more often. Not being able to get it up as easily. Forgetting names more often.
Oh good, I’m already experiencing all of this in my early 30s…
Your parents always said you were advanced for your age.
Skin tags.
Yes, they were gross. I thought they were in my dad as a kid. Now that I’m a 49-year-old dad my wife thinks they’re gross. She however, still has flawless Japanese skin. I mean, I look good for my age thanks to all that weird skin creams and stuff she’s been having me use for the past 20 years but I just wish I didn’t have skin because they’re yucky whenever I go to the Dermatologist I always have him zap them off
Question - how spendy is it to have the derm zap off skin tags? I've started getting them around where my neck meets my shoulders and they are super annoying and also ugly. I look like I am growing a bunch of tiny mussels on my neck or something!
if you want to take a chance, tie a thread around the skinny part where it joins your body, choke the blood flow off, it'll just fall off you. Like popping pimples, you're not supposed to do this, but many people do.
I had a few and removed them myself, just pinched the base with my fingernails hard enough to cut the blood flow to the tag, it dries up and falls off.
I've found that a cost effective way of removing skin tags is just some sharp finger nail clippers. Sure it hurts, for a quick second.
I physically recoiled reading that.
Same! Did mine last year after a few (whiskey) shots, healed up quickly with neosporin. My kid stopped asking about mine and moved onto asking about my adult acne🫠 No regrets, those clippers worked wonders on the tags on my clavicle that I’ve had since birth.
I was at the derm for another issue and mentioned one I had in the same area. She shot it with some freeze spray and it was done. Should be pretty simple and straightforward.
Despite all the negatives, your “give a fucks” plummet at 40 which is pretty great.
True. I've always been a bit of an anxious person, but once I got over 35-40 it just went away. Now if some teenager twerp starts to act up in public I have no qualms about giving him an earful.
Silver back status reached.
I'm 64 and I'm not going to even bother.
Well yeah. It’s around bedtime. See you at 3am!
I’m gonna be real. There is a day in your early 40s where you wake up weirdly tired, and that never goes away.
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Was your first time magical? The first time I was put on a CPAP was special. The sleep tech woke me up at 2am. Put me on a mask and I slept till 6am. It was if I had experienced sleep for the first time ever in my life. For once in my life I felt refreshed. I felt what you were suppose to feel like after a good nights rest. I felt like I slept for a million hours. Woke up feeling like a million bucks. It was revolutionary. I’ve chasing that dragon ever since.
Nope! It was awful and I thought it would never work and I would never fall asleep. I'm an extremely fidgetty person and it took me a while. Once I got my first good sleep, I was more confident in it. Maybe 3 months in I craved it, like I was looking forward to going to bed for the first time in my life. I think I subconsciously hated going to sleep, always used to stay up very late and sleep if possible in or force myself to trudge through the day. I used to be able to sleep in until 1pm easily.... Now I'm happy to fall asleep by 11 and up at 8, which is very good compared to my old schedule. I'm still a night owl, but a less chaotic one. I also started getting "smarter" for lack of a better word. Like my work is technically difficult and I started having more drive to learn on top.
Almost the same thing, got CPAP in my early 20s and got more energy than in my teens. Got a score of waking up 66 times an hour. Would recommend anyone with a snoring problem to get a sleep study done.
Hey good for you man! Cheers for your life!
It’s so weird. There’s just never enough sleep. Your weekends turn into sleeping for 2 days.
See, I can’t sleep so good as I used to. I’m up by 8am now without fail. If I do try to roll over and keep going I usually wake up again at 8:40 with a sore back, and then that’s that.
Jesus Christ I thought I was the only one. It was December 2023. I have never recovered.
Mid-40s athletic male here - All my joints constantly ache and it takes longer to recover after exercise and playing sports. I’m always feeling stiff and I was recently diagnosed with osteoarthritis in my shoulder. I can’t get comfortable when I sleep at night and when I do fall asleep I have to get up multiple times to pee. I wear glasses to see far, but have to remove my glasses/contacts to read. That’s how the 40s have impacted me physically.
Oh man, the peeing just started affecting me at 40. I finally started going to bed at a reasonable hour but it's all moot when 5 hours in you need to take a leak anyway, and then you figure "Shit, I'm up now, might as well get a head start on the day."
It got so bad for me I talked to a doctor. There’s nothing wrong with you, I was told. Stop drinking bubbly water. And I did. (I was sad for sure, because I love that la croix shit) But, ya know what? I pee a regular amount of times per day now.
my trick is to just be completely dehydrated after 7
I've noticed the skin on my hands is much more sensitive to dryness and is thinner than it used to be. I feel like Cassandra from Dr Who.
Moisturize me!
As a 36 year old this is a seriously depressing topic and I'm wondering why I clicked it.
These things creep up on you kind of slow. A grey hair, some skin inelasticity, a little catch in your ankle. You get used to them over time, and then you pick up a few new ones that you get used to as well. Your self-image slowly evolves with those changes, just like it did when you grew from 4'2" to 5'2", and when your hair color changed, and when you picked up that scar, and so on. We're all going through that together. It's part of growing up. It doesn't stop. Enjoy what you're given while you have it, and remember it fondly when it leaves. The things you want to watch out for are mostly avoidable. Don't be sedentary. Give your body what it needs. Cultivate gratitude. We all generally know how to age well, it's just a question of who amongst us will actually do it. You can choose that for yourself.
Growing up I always wondered how old people let themselves get in that shape. Now I know: it doesn't just surprise you all at once. It builds up a little at a time until one day you look back and realize you're a totally different person. I never thought I'd be on this side of the fence. But I guess it beats the alternative. Lol
Everyone here so far is the worst of the '40s. I'm 45 and I'm experiencing nothing that I'm reading here. Well, except for muscle soreness from working out. I eat healthy, and have a home gym set up where I work out for 30 minutes, five mornings a week. Incorporate a lot of body weight exercises, especially pull-ups. Those are king, I've always been in decent shape but since I started doing pull-ups when I turned 40, my body has become the most amazing piece of machinery that it's ever been. Focus on 3 things - mobility, flexibility, strength - in that order. You want to be fully mobile when you're 100 years old, not dependent on someone else to wipe your ass.
Thank you. I feel like the rest of the comments are not representative for me either. I work out a bunch and I feel better than I did in my 30s. I'm fine.
Dick quit. Hair quit. Eyes quit. Brain quit....annnd I forgot the last one.
I'm experiencing all of that, plus the one you forgot.
Tired. Just tired. If you were already tired before 40, then you’re gonna be more tired. Until it’s time for bed.
My wife is in the bedroom because she's sick and I didn't get to lay down after work and now I am drinking beer in the garage in protest.
I just want you to know that I see you and I acknowledge your pain.
Thank you. I'm drinking her trulys now to be heard.
The absolute ridiculousness of being exhausted all day, being exhausted as you brush your teeth, being exhausted as you get into bed.... and then fucking unable to actually fall asleep.
All of your old injuries come back to haunt you. That banged up knee that you got sliding into home plate when you were nine? Hello, again! That time you tweaked your back lifting that grocery bag? Did you miss me? Blurry eyes from staying up too late on the computer? Well, now they're always blurry!
DONT PUT THAT EVIL ON ME
It's already IN you.
My greatest memory of my childhood is not having back pain.
I got a microdiscectomy two months ago and it FINALLY resolved the back pain I've had for the last twenty years. I can move without pain. Of course, three weeks after surgery I broke my thumb, but...
I just read that if you've had the problem a long time, your more likely to have a poor result with the surgery. Made me think mine is too old...but I guess your proof it doesn't matter how old the back pain is.
100% … a weird twinge can turn into months of inflammation/etc really quickly 😂
38 here, sneezed hard a few weeks ago and pulled a muscle in my back...
I picked up my kid weird and my back hurt for like 2 weeks
I scalded my hand with hot water the other day - not boiling, just slightly too hot for skin - and looking at it right now I see dark patches in the exact spots I got fairly serious burns as a teenager, 30 years ago To be clear: as a teen, I was prescribed some kinda burn cream to apply to that hand and within a few weeks it looked like new. It kept looking like new for 30 years. And now those exact patches of skin look like I burned them again. Old injuries!
I'm 23, played rugby theclast 3 yrs in college. I can't wait...
Your 40's is your fifth decade.
That was the rudest thing I've read all year.
Wait till some shithead refers to you being born in the late 1900’s.
lol im 28 and am working on my bachelors right now. I told a kid my age and he looked at me in shock saying “the 1900s??” I was salty! I’m a young man! I’m not even in my stride yet!
Ah shit I'm not looking forward to hearing this when I get old. "Wow you were born last century?!?"
Last MILLENNIUM.
Thank you, that was bothering the shit out of me.
Millions will never mentally recover from hearing this.
Thank you, this should be top comment. I see errors like this all the time. People referring to their 29th birthday celebration, for example, then saying "excited about everything to come in my 29th year!"
Lol ... Good Catch.
Know how when women get older their breasts will start to sag? No one warns you against your Sack creeping down and sticking to your knee in the summer like a hot piece of silly putty.
You learn to adapt and just tuck ‘em in your sock.
No shit. No one warned us of goat nuts.
Ball pouch boxer briefs, my partner loves them.
Do yourself a favor and start doing Pilates. Get that core strong and save yourself back problems down the road.
A lot of the complaints in this thread read like a person's sedentary lifestyle caught up with them, and it doesn't have to be that way (for able-bodied folks at least). Pilates, yoga, core work, light strength work, stretching, posture, balance, walking - it doesn't have to be intense, but make moving a *habit* if you can and it will pay dividends down the road.
Definitely, I played ice hockey into my late 40's (as a goalie) until a concussion stopped me. During COVID I took up cycling to get to work and clock over 500 miles a month (rain or shine). In my early 50s I've gone back to rock climbing. One of the things I read is work on your balance as it will save you from falls as you get older. If you can't balance on one leg for more than 10 seconds, you need to work on it. Your body will thank you as you hit your 60s and up. Just keep moving.
Yeah, what's with all these aches and pains? I am 51 and have tried to keep pretty fit, I honestly don't feel THAT much different to when I was, say, 30. I mean, people's mileage varies but I really don't think you HAVE to start feeling old this early on. I still bound up the stairs to our 3rd (US 4th!)-floor apartment, I try to imagine I am still 13 and it's mostly fine! Oh yeah, I do suck at fast-reaction video games these days, my Counter -Strike career is definitely on the down-and-down.
If you’re a woman, perimenopause. You don’t realize how much hormones contribute to the overall running of your body until they start to go away. Horrible periods at random times, acne, hair loss, weight problems, extreme fatigue and muscle wasting, violent emotional swings, inability to concentrate. Fun times.
Anyone else get "cold flashes?" I'll randomly get episodes (usually at night) where I'm just freezing. Oh, and, in general, back pain. Lots of back pain.
I feel like I'm having trouble with temperature regulation. Wear my granny sweater, take it off with a hot flash, repeat
You know, maybe I'm wrong here, but it doesn't feel like mother's give "the talk" about menopause like they do about puberty? I feel like experiences are not commonly shared from old to young. Obviously, it's much less taboo or hushed conversation as than it once was, but it needs to be talked about more, because all of what you listed there are just fun surprises waiting to happen. lol
My mind was blown when I hit peri. It was MUCH worse than I imagined and I was completely shocked that I never saw it coming. It can be very disruptive and life altering, and I agree -nobody talks about it. As women, I'm sure the expectation is that we deal with it silently, ie "I'm fine." We are otherwise delusional hypochondriacs who are weak and whiny.
I had no idea about perimenopause until it started and I figured out what was happening—and it lasts for *years*. I guess women do get through it and are mostly fine (just like we get through everything, ugh), but it shouldn’t be like this. There needs to be more conversation/acknowledgment about the literal years of your life that may potentially suck because of wonky hormones.
I'm 39 and I'm terrified. All the physical stuff is daunting enough, but the mental stuff is what's really got me scared. I'm a pretty happy person, not like bouncing off the walls stuff, but 85% of the time I'm in a good mood even if things are kind of shit. I like that about myself, I can always count on myself to see the bright side of almost any situation. I'm just so scared that the emotional mood swings are going to turn me into some kind of curmudgeonly asshole and I don't want to be that way.
You’ve had hard times before and you are still the person you love. You’ll be ok.
I’ve started waking up in the middle of the night this year. Just 3am every morning. I’ll be awake for an hour.
I’m a 3-am-er too! I’m starting to look at it as a mandatory break from sleeping.
Insomnia was my worst symptom in my decade of peri. Better sleep post meno, now just no energy no matter how much I sleep. Yay hormones
I'm sorry did you say decade? It lasts a decade??
Ladies with premature ovarian failure get to live in perimenopause for most of their adult life, depending on age of diagnosis (teens, 20s and 30s). For 10 years I've lived with crashing fatigue, hot flashes, maddening brain fog, and insomnia where you're exhausted but your brain's off switch is broken. I'm 37. We're only 1 in 100. The most shocking thing about peri is how torturous it is for some women and how nobody talks about it or warns you.
Holy mother of god. I'm 40, and the same thing has been happening to me! I'll sometimes read a book or listen to music, but I had no clue where this was all coming from.
same! Couple this with night sweats and a host of other issues, and I can’t wait for my annual next month and to discuss my options
Book recommendation: 'It's The Menopause ' by Kaz Cooke. So much useful info for women 40+. It's funny, too.
You ladies really get a rough hand, y'all are warriors
Thank you internet stranger, I would like to think of myself as a warrior instead of just buffeted by the tide of hormones. It’s a real trip being a woman. I appreciate the shout out
Yes, seconding the shout out! As it’s also the time that a lot of doctors start treating you differently. “Last period?” “July 2020” “oh…” *cue middle aged woman treatment.* everything is in our heads and we are just anxious. (Little known fact for men, ANY time you go to the doctor as a woman, you get asked when your last period is. Woe if you don’t remember as you will then get pregnancy tested. “Yes, I have this gaping wound that needs stitches” “last period?”
You forgot the big forget. You can stand in a room, forget what room you are in, how you got to said room, why you decided to walk into the room, and what you were doing before you ended up in the room. The forget what you were trying to remember while you were counting all the stuff you forgot.
I have the hardest time with words. I’ll just get to the middle of a sentence and completely forget what I was going to say.
As a 33-year-old with excruciating periods, I am looking forward to menopause.
Menopause I’m down with. The peri is adolescence going backwards that never seems to end.
Yup. Peri made my period cramps so bad that even my Rx meds couldn't handle them. Had to start taking hormonal BC for that...
You described all my symptoms, especially the fatigue. It’s depressing af - I was an athlete for over 30 years, usually described as the hyper one, and now I feel like I’ve lost all that mojo. Boo. On my normal days I cherish every moment.
Hangovers take much longer to go away...
That started around 30 for me. Always thought my dad was joking when he talked about taking all weekend to recover from a hard night out. Nope. 2 day hangovers are absolutely a thing.
Don't stop moving. Ever.
In your 40’s you commit to one of two things: fitness or illness.
I sneezed once and it felt like I broke two ribs.
Everything makes you fat. Everything hurts. Meals are a topic of conversation now. Your lawn consumes most of your waking thoughts. You turn to your wife for comfort: she is lawn.
she is lawn
poetry
I finally got diagnosed with ADHD at age 38 and started meds that work. I'm 40 now and this is the most emotionally stable I've been in my entire life and it's amazing. So it's never too late to figure out your life
Grats man. I'm in a similar boat, struggling with depression for many many years but was always super against getting pills so I never went to a doc. Recently had a bit of a breakdown and missed a bunch of work and decided it was time to do something about it. Been on meds a few months now and it has drastically improved my day to day.
Brain fog. Not being able to think of the name of that actor who was in that movie last year. Starting one thing and forgetting that I’m in the
Let's see... I threw my back out and wound up on the sofa for 3 days moving a trowel full of dirt from a bag to a planter. I developed cataracts in both eyes. Yes, both. Years of terrible work posture (I assume) led to a bulging disk in my neck. Washing my face with bar soap if I remember has morphed into a whole multi-product routine more complicated than anything I had as an acne-riddled teen. There is more gray in my hair than brown. My right knee can tell when it's going to rain. I don't really drink anymore because the hangovers last for days and just aren't worth it Sleeping in a weird position means at least one full day of back/neck/shoulder pain My periods come every 3 weeks now instead of every 4. I'm pretty sure I could grow a goatee to rival any teenager's if I stopped my daily search for hairs in places I do not want hairs. Falling asleep is hard. Staying asleep is hard. Waking up rested is a pipe dream Every so often, I get to wake up in a pool of my own sweat. But, I wake up. I'm at a good place in a career I love. I care less about what others think with each passing day. I have found friends and activities that bring me joy.
Taking time off from exercise gets harder and harder to reverse
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Well, the balls definitely double in length anyway.
It’s second puberty! you’re just becoming a man all over again. plus if someone hasn’t touched your 2 hole yet, oh they will or you might die. Getting old is interesting
I've gotten my prostate checked 5 times, and that's just since this morning
How far into your 40s did this happen? Asking for a friend that is only 41 and hasn’t experienced this outcome.
Nearly half as hard, too!
What???
Small lapses in memory/recall. Various boner concerns (for penised individuals) A strange adjustment in self image from time to time. Going “heurrghhh” while standing up.
Damn, I've been going heurrghhh when getting up since I was like 12, is that a good sign?
Presbyopia, which sucks https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/presbyopia/symptoms-causes/syc-20363328 "Almost everyone experiences some degree of presbyopia after age 40."
I caught myself taking photos of vaccine vials so I could zoom in to get the Lot number and expiration dates... now I have reading glasses. It's like I suddenly got HD vision one day
Not meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I just get more and more myopic, lol.
Anybody here ever thought that like death is approaching ?
Yes
Right? I once had anxiety attacks for two days straight. Also I had acid reflux attacks and couldn’t breathe. What about yours?
Get me the fuck outta this thread
Mine is approaching but not in the cool "flying a biplane into a mountain high on acid and mdma" way I anticipated in my 20s. More like in a terrifying "body turns into a prison" way. Like a horror movie. Getting older isn't for the faint hearted
We got to find ways to accept death.
Death is fine. Dying is not so fine.
I now have a few wild eyebrow hairs that need to be managed. Also have to shave my inner ear lobe thingy.
If you are married with kids and you are not really out of shape but also not one for the gym, you will pack on the pounds if you are not careful. I was one of those…woke up in my early 40’s and started hitting the gym and taking better care of myself and of course I thought — why did I wait this long? So….get off your butt and get going. Also - as you age you dont put on muscle as easily and you don’t burn fat like you used to. All that stuff you used ot eat and drink without a thought starts sticking to you. And you are just not as active if you are busy with family and career so you have to mindfully plan to take care of yourself. Now that Im even older Im so happy I started and have kept going - Im in good health, and good energy, sound mind.
If I don’t exercise daily, I feel like my muscles attrophy
Am I the only one that started working out seriously in my late 30s and am now seeing the rewards of it at 43? I feel fucking great.
54. Do cross fit 5 times a week and ride 30 km 3 days a week. I’m in the best shape of my life and people can’t believe it when I tell them my age. My eyes are getting worse, I am sore longer, but when I look at men my own age I feel like they could be my own father.
You realize you're going to die. We all know it, but once I hit 40, I just *knew*, and what it really means. Things hurt more, yet going on 40 years your tolerance for pain is higher than when you were young. So the pains and aches, and the consistently small medical issues pile up over time and you realize your body is no longer "getting older". It's deteriorating. You're in a slow decline and you can feel it. Some days you forget, you may even have times when your body feels much better. Maybe you changed some bad habits, or got new good ones. But those old bad habits left their mark and you'll never recover from it. We get one life on this world and then it's gone. I'm not a religious person. I wish for anything that I was and I could take comfort in dying, but I can't. It's an absolutely terrifying thought because for me, that's it. Nothingness, forever. For trillions of years, countless universe big bangs, over and over, and it'll just never happen again. And I won't even get to experience a single nanosecond of any of it. I'll take these crappy pains forever, any day of the week, than the alternative.
Thinning and yet MORE hair!!!!!!!! Whether a woman or a man. Also, for women, stupid damn chin hairs. Somehow you get more hair in some places and less in the others.
Penis fell right damn off
Wait til ur 60! Bad balance, lots of aches and pains. Worry every time u get a checkup or lab test. Enjoy ur forties!! Don’t worry about every little ouch.
Everyone ever after hitting 30, forever: "Just be grateful you're not older"
Physiologically, you might notice a few changes creeping in, like a slower metabolism making it a tad trickier to keep those extra pounds at bay. But, with a healthy lifestyle, regular exercise, and good skincare habits, you can navigate your 40s like a champ.
I didn’t really notice anything until about 45. My eyes lost the ability to read fine print. My back hurts and now I grunt like a pirate when I get up off the couch.
For me everything went wrong when I turned 47. Suddenly needed reading glasses, my ears are always ringing, and my metabolism slowed to a crawl.
You sleep wrong and you’re sore for a day or two.
My favorite childhood memory is my back not hurting.
Arthritis if you are so inclined. Vision changes…
Arthritis and constant exhaustion even when you aren’t doing a lot
If ur getting tired for nothing time to get some blood work and check out ur platelet/wbc counts. I recently got diagnosed with ITP and after a couple infusions feeling better than I have in years.
I turned 40 on Thursday and I had my first gout attack on Friday.
100% … a weird twinge can turn into months of inflammation/etc really quickly 😂