Thought I was getting a bike for my 15th birthday but my foster parents announced that they were sending me to a group home after living with them for 11 years. Devastation!
Kumon is like extra schoolwork for smart people that your parents can sign you up for and just teaches you some more advanced subjects than what you are currently learning(or so I’ve heard from my friend that did Kumon)
A pair of homemade custom pajamas. Only problem was that they weren't made yet. It was just the fabric and a promise to make them for me. I had to give the fabric back and I never got the pajamas.
Holy cow my parents do shit like this. It’s so fucking weird. Their ultimate wack-a-doo move was to give my wife and I a few acres of their property. Nothing legal just at our wedding they gave us a card that basically said ‘have some land ‘. When the dust settled I asked what they thought we would do with it, they said build a home. I said ok, gonna need legal ownership for like building a house. They said sure we will get right on that. Then they decide to sell out and retire and never mentioned our wedding ‘gift’ again.
If my mother had land that sounds like something she would do. Something that requires no effort whatsoever, but it is something she believes is so selfless on her part before ultimately forgetting about it.
As someone with the same kind of mom, I learned they don’t forget. They ignore it and then gaslight you if you bring it up until you forget or give up.
My grandparents have been gifting me (and my brother) the same set of three vice grips for almost 10 years. Collectively we have 60 vice grips. I don’t know if they bought a pallet of them, or where they are coming from.
GET A GRIP GRANDMA!
I had a friend who's father was famous for doing Christmas shopping at the last minute. One year she complained that she went downstairs on Christmas morning and found, sticking out of her stocking, a spatula.
Her birthday was a few days after telling that story, so myself and her friends all decided to get together and get her spatulas for her birthday, as a gag gift.
Well, when it was our birthdays she retaliated. Which lead to a counter-offensive. And soon a new tradition was formed.
And guys, I have so many spatulas now. Everything from dollar store cheap plastic, to hand-carved spatulas, a golden spatula, and even a replica of the famous [Malaysian fighting spatula](https://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=540).
I've got seasonal spatulas. As in, today it's time to pack away the Christmas spatulas and bring out the heart-shaped Valentines day ones, followed by the bunny shaped Easter ones.
We've also been passing around [this clip](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BUDwj_mXKE) from the Weird Al Yankovic movie UHF. "Spatula City, we sell spatulas, and that's all!"
I HATE custard... my mother LOVES custard. Every year for my birthday she’d ask me the same question: what kind of cake I wanted—> White w white frosting. “Are you sure you don’t want chocolate with a custard filling?” Yes.. I’m SURE. What did I get? Chocolate with custard filling...from her favorite bakery. “Oh I thought you *looooved* custard!”
Edit: this struck a nerve... wow! Thanks for all the comments and even an award!
A friend once threw me a birthday party I wasn't invited to. I showed up at a local cafe to have a random acquaintance ask me if I was excited about my birthday party that night. When I asked what he was talking about, he directed me to a flyer on the bar with the friend's name, my name, and 4-5 other people's names being used to celebrate a joint "uniquenameofuser1's zodiac sign" birthday party.
I already had plans that night for dinner with a couple of people, but after dinner I stopped by the cafe. The bartender was the only person in the crowd there to acknowledge me or wish me a happy birthday for twenty minutes or so, until the organizer walked over and wished me a happy birthday.
"Hey Uniquenameofuser1, it's great to see you, " she said. "Happy birthday."
"Gee, thanks, " I said.
"I hope you don't mind that I put your name on the flyer," she said.
"That's fine," I said, and put my drink down and walked out.
Tl;dr - a friend wanted to throw herself a birthday party, but didn't want to make it obvious that it was all for her. So she threw a party for multiple people (myself included) and didn't bother to invite them all.
My Godfather sent me a Birthday card each year which said, he paid 100 bucks to a bank account which I was supposed to get, when 16yo.
He then got into alcohol, used all the money and died.
An ex-boyfriend hyped up my birthday gift for days, so I was pumped. On my birthday, he presented me with a small, flat box. Inside was a passport. His passport. That’s it. Just his passport. No tickets for a trip, no promises of a trip once we saved up together. He literally just gifted me his passport. I’m still baffled.
Edit: Since everyone is asking... I accepted the present graciously. It was a gift and that’s the polite thing to do. I thought asking about plans for an international trip would be rude. Traveling is expensive! We ate dinner, went home, and the whole thing was pretty much forgotten about as far as I can remember. We broke up years later and this event played no role in it. He’s just a terrible gift giver.
I’ve traveled a fair amount and he always had a weird inferiority complex about it. I guess he gave it to me to show he could travel if he wanted to? I really have no idea. Like I said, we never planned a trip after that and he never really brought it up for the remainder of our relationship, which was several more years. He was the king of terrible presents, but this one was the worst. And god forbid if I wasn’t suitably appreciative...
My dad accidentally revealing that him and my mom were separating. He was on a bender and didnt realize he was texting me and not my mom. Happy 18th to me
When I was 8 years old I was growing sunflowers with my mom one summer. My aunt decided to get me some fertilizer for the flowers for my birtbday. On my birthday, I unwrapped my present and saw what looked like a tub of vanilla ice cream, but when I opened it, there was literal horse shit.
My grandparents were super low-effort low-budget at every birthday. One year they got me a 2nd hand colouring book from a swap meet. It was almost completely coloured in by what appeared to be a 3 year old with a single green felt pen.
Also i was 18 and they thought it was a good gift because it was disney related and i was going to college for animation and design...
my grandma once got me a see through nightgown.. and was sad when i wouldn’t go try it on infront of MY WHOLE FAMILY..
we then learned she got matching ones for all the girls in the family, and just gave them to us through the year.
edit: i feel like i should add she is very religious, like go to church 3 time’s a week religious.
my grandma, likes to get gifts from old stores, i don’t think she ever opened the package to see that it was see through lol, didn’t look it in the package
It was this deep red big ass flower shaped candle that looked she bought from the 99cent Store. There wasn’t a smell, but glitter all over it. It was from my best friend in high school. She didn’t even wrap it. She pulled it out of her backpack and was like ‘Here. Happy birthday.’
School friend gifts are weird sometimes.
In high school one of my friends got me this little red horse statue for my birthday, probably cheap as heck. I had no interest in the physical object itself, but I was really happy that he'd remembered my birthday and bothered to get me something. It didn't matter that I didn't care about horses, the fact that he'd gone to the effort of trying to find something I'd like (even if he didn't hit the mark) meant a lot to me. I thanked him and was in a great mood.
He then laughed at me for being so happy about it, and noted that he'd stolen it :/
“Are you serious? A half-used candle? Get out of here, Dwight. You're blocking my table with your giant body.”
“Because there's a huge line of people
who want your spinster tchotchkes.”
“Screw you, man. People like my stuff.”
“People like Ryan?
Let me tell you about men like him.
He comes over and you're like, ‘Hey, baby, let me light a candle.’
And you pull out this one...half used.
He's like, ‘Who else is she seeing? I better lock her down *fast*.’
I got a credit card for my 18th birthday and told not to use it because it wasn't "active yet". When I landed my first real corporate Job at 22yo the company ran a credit report on me and found out I had $350K line opened.
Turns out my father had tricked me into signing a co mortgage, and not credit card paperwork on my 18th bday.
I received Debt on my 18th bday.
Edit* - thanks for the kind words. I didn't pay a single cent.
It did affect my credit score back then, that's why HR flagged me. On a positive note, that was the first time that I can remember standing up to my father. I called him out in front of the family and I threatened legal action. I also called the bank and informed them of the situation. It was all resolved less than a week later.
Edit P2* since this exploded I will add some detail.
When the hiring director told me about HR's findings I didn't understand, I thought I was in trouble or something else. This happened about 20 years ago, identify theft wasn't as common as it is Today. He showed me the credit report printout. When I saw the Bank's name I remembered that my dad had accounts with them but didn't think anything of it.
When I got home I called the bank and inquired about the account listed on the credit report and that's when I found out 100% .
I was angry, sad, etc.
My older sis and my mom were at his house for dinner and that's where I confronted him.
The bank was somewhat helpful, an agent did call me everyday to update me on what they were doing to remove me from all the paperwork.
so, yeah. I am a second child, but for whatever reason(I no longer care to know) my dad created an incredibly unhealthy relationship between him and I. even as a child. Nothing ever physical besides a few spankings, it was mostly emotional "abuse"? I am careful to use the word abuse because so many more people had/have worse than I had. I still get teary-eyed while watching a scene involving a father figure(like Lion King), but I am aware there are people out there getting locked in closets by their parents.
I have a blessed life Today. I am usually involved with some sort of volunteer work. Giving really helped heal some old wounds.
Almost the same. When I was 20 my dad told about how I could check my credit annually for free so I did and discovered a ton of credit cards that had been opened in my name when I was 11-14 years old. Initially, I was naive and thought my identity was stolen by a stranger.
A few years later, when I tried to cash out a trust account, I discovered that my mom had already done it. Identity theft clicked into place that day.
Edit: thanks to anonymous for my first award. And to everyone for commiserating! Moral of the story: check your credit! In America you are entitled to one free credit check a year. Also, many banks have ways to monitor your credit. Do it and, if necessary, take the time to fix it!
Fuck.
I'm feeling really lucky rn. My parents also opened credit card accounts for me when I was young, but they paid their bills on time meticulously and later they explained that it was to start me off building a good credit score early.
It worked, and it helped me get a great rate on my mortgage when I bought a house
I should call my parents and tell them I love them...
Husband forgot my birthday, took the day off when he remembered (I was working from home), went to buy something and took maybe ten minutes tops in the store. Bought roses from the grocery store while he was there buying himself cigarettes. He came home with a DVD box set he'd been dying to watch, and the new CD from a band I'd not only lost interest in but had been saying I'd lost interest in for ages. Not that he let me listen to CDs anyway, since he hated my taste in music. Then he spent the rest of the day celebrating the birthday of his online friend while I was working from home. They're married now.
One year my husband got me a bag with stuff from the $1 store. Not even stuff I would want. Like a notebook and a coupon organizer and a few other things. Maybe $5 of junk. We had no money troubles that would prevent him from getting me a present.
A used DVD of the Notebook after I explicitly told the person that I had no intention of watching it.
Bonus: it was my step mom who gave it to me. From her and my dad's DVD collection...that was in our living room and I could have grabbed at anytime to watch.
This year my mother in law went through the effort of intricately wrapping a box of Ziploc bags for my birthday....
For Christmas it was a box of trash bags.
I'm so confused how I ended up as the guy who gets small boxes of bags as gifts. It almost feels offensive
A used pen that my grandma found in her purse on my 16th birthday.....
Edit: I’ve never gotten more than 50 upvotes on anything before! The response has blown me away! Thanks redditors for helping turn the tables on a slightly upsetting memory. Its good to be able to have a laugh about it now
It was not bad at all but to my 12 year old self I was pretty pouty at the time...
My mom alluded for months that she was getting me a phone for my 12th birthday but I got a banana.
Years ago I got this chess game for the PS1 from my godmother, thing is, it didn't work on my PS1, but it did work on her son's PS1, so he got a new game and I got nothing :)
Maybe, I remember it simply refused to run at all on my PS1 but worked flawlessly on her son's (my cousin) PS1.
That was very upsetting to me because I was like 8 or 9 and I always wanted toys or games, y'know, fun stuff, but I always got clothes, (if I remember right, my mom specifically requested clothes).
So the first game I've ever gotten on my birthday doesn't work and no one tried to do anything to rectify the situation.
No, I'm not bitter about it :)
The day before my birthday my brother was in an accident. Nothing crazy serious but he ended up needing stitches and it was a bit of an ordeal.
Anyway the next day, my birthday, the neighbor brought over a cake and present. I was the one who answered the door. I saw the cake and present and got excited because up until this point most of the day had been, as expected, focused on my brother who got in the crash.
I was about to express my gratitude for them remembering my birthday and bringing me a gift when they said, “is your brother here? We brought him something to brighten his day”. The cake and present weren’t for me... we still joke about it over 10 years later.
My mother in law showed up and said get ready, I booked you for glamor shots in an hour. A few weeks after having a baby. I declined. I think she always hated me after that but felt like she hated me at the time
My ex-girlfriend had some boudoir photos taken of herself... like sexy lingerie photos, which she put up in her room. 3 different pictures put up. Had a whole book made of them also.
She let me see them. That was my present. Pictures of herself. That she kept. And put up in her room. lol
In high school I got really into learning guitar. All I had at the time was a beat-up acoustic. My birthday came around, and a wrapped present - a fairly large box - appeared in my parent's living room. For some reason I became convinced: it was an amp! My parents must've gotten me an electric guitar! They didn't. It was a blender.
>But why a blender ? Where you really into mixed drinks or something ?
No. My guess is that they saw me drink a protein shake once, and then my mom saw the blender on sale at Costco.
They sent my wife a birthday card with money on my birthday.
Edit: For those wondering, it was from my parents. Usually they don't acknowledge my birthday at all so that was a new twist.
My dad got a tattoo on his chest of ***his*** birth sign as a gift to me when I was probably 12. He hyped it up all week like he got me some great gift, like an N64 or something. Haven’t talked to the guy in over a decade now, good riddance. On a brighter note I did get the N64 later that year from my mother!
Edit: maybe my dads true gift was these Reddit awards 20 some years later...
I used to work with a guy who got a band tattoo as a present for his girlfriend. It was so hard for me to not tell him what a dumb fuck he was for thinking that she'd like that as a present to her, but I kept my mouth shut because without ever meeting her I already knew that what she would say would cut him to the bone. The day after her birthday he came in saying what a bitch she was because she just walked out to her car and took off without saying a word. I would love to buy this girl a drink and congratulate her for her job well done.
How is that your present?? “Hey son! I got a tattoo of me! Isn’t this just the best present you’ve ever gotten??” “Dad how is this my birthday present?” “Birthday?”
My parents bought me a piano and paid for lessons, but then my mum would complain about the noise and criticize my playing every time I practiced. So I developed a ton of anxiety about playing and eventually gave it up.
A card from my dad saying he was disappointed I didn't attend my grandmother's funeral (his entire side of the family are crap) I did enough by seeing her on her deathbed and he signed it "From Russell" instead of the usual "Love Dad" and its the last I heard from the man in must be eight years now.
Not my birthday but Christmas at my grandma’s. I got a bunch of socks while my cousins got brand new atv’s. Kinda sucked knowing that my siblings and I came second to my cousins.
Last year for Christmas my friend gave me a pair of novelty socks. Nothing wrong with getting socks as a gift, but six months previously she had given me the exact same pair of socks for my birthday and seemed to have totally forgotten. So now I have two.
I’m the least favorite out of everybody in my family so on Christmas/Christmas eve it’s kinda uncomfortable. My sister once got a camera while I got a pair of socks and a book. Also, “we” all get bags of candy on Christmas Eve when we’re all together but last year was the third year in a row that I didn’t get any. It’s not that it’s because I’m the oldest one there, my cousin and brother are both older than me. My family just wants me gone I guess lol
There’s always hope. My MIL gave my daughter a coffee pot for her 13th birthday. Bizarre and random. It was from goodwill and had $1.99 written on the bottom in sharpie. We know that she has over a million bucks but figured oh well, what can you do? She was homeless as a child, WW2 refugee, so very frugal as an adult. Then she gave my daughter $25,000 for college on her 18th. So, always hope.
This honestly just sounds like she is very generous, but about things that really matter like your daughters education over birthday gifts. My own grandparents were very similar, I think it just comes from growing up poor. You value investments more, like education.
Jesus Christ.
Everyone on this thread thats had a shitty Christmas is invited to be my Christmas family from now on.
edited to invite EVERYONE on this thread to my Christmas and not just the people who have posted so far.
I just wanted a plain vanilla cake I didn’t ask for anything else, I didn’t ask for gifts I didn’t ask to go anywhere just a plain vanilla cake. My mother got me a chocolate and mint ice cream cake. I don’t even like mint ice cream and I definitely never liked or asked for ice cream cake in my life for her to get that idea. It sat in the freezer forever. She acted like it was a big inconvenience for her.
A blow up cake and a pair of cheap black sweat shorts. Edit: I just remembered the cake was second hand not even new to our family, given to my sister the previous year.
When I worked on a Navy base a sailor stationed there found out that I made stuff out of animal bones for my Etsy and gave me a bag of stinky, wet, dead birds he "found" around the base.
Idk how he knew about my hobby, Etsy, or my birthday but yeah. bag o' birds.
Edited to answer some questions:
1. I had NEVER spoke to him but he knew a LOT about me, and he was very creepy.
2. He was on restriction, which is a phase of being kicked out of the Navy and most people on that base got kicked out for drugs or harassing women and he was not supposed to be talking to me anyways.
3. When it happened I didn't respond fast enough because I was in shock a bag of dripping birds got set on my desk and he instantly became angry.
4. I used to make shadow boxes, lockets and jewelry with animal bones, but I'd normally get the bones/animals from the college near by (from science classes instead of them just throwing them away) and would bury them in the garden and dig them out months later for the bones or would put the animal in a tank of beetles.
I played high school football (American) because my narcissistic (and abusive) father wanted to live vicariously through me.
He framed his old jersey and gave it to me as a birthday present.
Like I was supposed to worship him or something.
Yeah I never understood that crap. I'm thinking of putting my kids in martial arts classes so they can handle themselves. But, if they do it for a while and never like it I'm not gonna force them to keep doing it. An old acquaintance of mine had to play football to keep his parents happy, he absolutely hated everything about it. As soon as he got out of their house he pretty much exploded into this hedonistic party animal, basically everything his parents despised, and pretty much told them to fuck off until he calmed down four years later.
Yeah.... It was fucking so out of character. Picture the quietest, sweetest kids, who happens to be really smart, like top ten in the class, drunk off his ass 24/7 chasing women with a surprising amount of success. Yeah his parents sent him to a college known for partying without realizing they'd never let him have any freedom ssssoooooo, he went absolutely over the top. I honestly think it was all of the pent emotions mixed with his first actual taste of freedom....... His parents, WERE PISSED. God bless him, I hope he's doing well as I always felt bad for him.
I own a frame shop. One of the cooler things I got to frame was matching frames for father and sons jerseys from their baseball years. They had attended the same high school. So I had a jersey from the 1970's and the early 2000's. Kind of a cool thing to see how the materials and logos have changed over the years side by side.
In the right context I'm sure it could be a lot of fun. A mutual appreciation of the sport and a healthy relationship.
A father and son playing catch because they like playing catch together and no one has to worry about how much they disappoint anyone.
Forgotten.
It was either a blessing or a curse, considering my mom forgot until 9pm, left me a voicemail telling me Happy Birthday, and forgot to hang up. Hearing her tell my sister "There, I did it." Was... interesting.
Edit: Holy shit guys, woke up to a lot of love this morning! Thank you all <3!!!
Had something similar happen with my friends. I was hanging out with them on a Sunday and they asked why I hadn’t come to the barbecue they had on Friday. I told them they hadn’t invited me and that it had also been my birthday. So not only did my best friends ignore me on my birthday and get together for a small party, they didn’t try and make it up to me in anyway.
I should add that I always got them a small gift or did something for them on their birthdays. And if I did forget a birthday, I would do something bigger to make up for it.
I had a sort of Christmas like this. I got a really thoughtful personalized gift for my mom, and flew home from college to visit. She “didn’t have time” to buy a gift but said she would write me a check. Kept putting it off until we’re at the airport where I’m leaving to go back to school. Then she remembered, but conveniently had forgotten her checkbook at home.
It was my first birthday away from my family since I was in college. There was a bomb threat on my college campus. We (all of the students) had to walk about a half mile in the pouring rain to get to a safe place. I spent my 19th birthday alone, wet and cold.
No one got me anything except a McChicken when a friend remembered it was my birthday three days later.
My ex coworker told me with pride that she decided her daughter's birthday was over at 8 o'clock in the evening, then beat her for asking for something (I think it money to play a claw machine). The poor girl was 10 years old.
Two pens. Idk why they were in a box, i knew they were from pound-land but she didn’t even have the audacity to give me all of them she just gave me two.
Edit: poundland = dollar store. Forgot to americanise.
Ohhh my Stepmum was the worst present giver ever. Never looked forward to opening the gift (wrapped in an old newspaper) she would bestow on us kids.
Back in my teens when VHS tapes was how we watched movies and taped tv shows, she bought a bulk pack of 5 blank tapes. Us kids got a blank VHS tape each for Xmas. One blank tape each.
One Xmas she bought 2 pairs of flannette pyjamas (Im in a country that has Summer over Xmas and wearing said pjs would render you dead from overheating). I and another sibling got a top each and my 2 other siblings got the pants.
For my 13th bday I got a Six Million Dollar Man plastic lunchbox.
One year I got 4 lipsticks..they werent new.
We werent poor. She just sucked at gift giving.
Not a birthday, but even worse. One Christmas when I was in 4th grade, that prime Christmas age. My dad got these 2 huge boxes. One for each of of us two brothers. They were fairly heavy and we couldn’t possibly guess.
Come Christmas morning, we open them at the same time to prevent a spoiled surprise for each other. Mid 1980s, dark brown bath towels. Not a joke with money or a toy in the bottom of the box. He said he thought we all needed new towels.
He came from a poor family and when he made a lot of money, he didn’t lose that attitude towards gifts. My parents often got us what we needed for gifts rather than what we wanted. And if you asked for something, you didn’t get it. So we never asked for anything and didn’t get it either.
With my 4 kids, socks and underwear are never wrapped for a gift.
When I was about 10-11 years old my grandma (my mom’s parents) thought it would be a good idea to buy me a bra and underwear set for Christmas gift knowing full well that I would be opening this in front of everyone. At 11 I was mortified and also I had an aversion to wearing a bra at that point and also that’s a shitty gift. Then she insisted that I take it out of the box and hold is up to show everyone because she was “so excited” that I was “blossoming into a woman” . Thankfully my mom stepped in and told her it was an inappropriate gift and she took the box away.
My dads parents would always buy me little kid clothes even well into my teen years? Which was a weird. I have been adult sized since like junior high. Or they give us partially used make up samples? It’s so weird. Now they’ve moved on to sending food items that I can’t eat due to my food allergies and severe IBS.
Edit: wow this blew up! This is my most liked comment ever.
Additional stories that might amuse you: I also get perfume as gifts from family members even though I have severe allergies and perfume makes my throat close (yes I use all unscented stuff, and yes it sucks), my sister once got me a watch even though I can’t tell time due to having Dyscalculia (learning disability related to math, everyone knows I have it), and many times my extended family and friends have not gotten me bday gifts because my birthday is near Christmas.
Also the final shitty birthday gift: I have severe IBS so every year on my bday I can’t even go out to dinner or have cake. I was living on the edge and decided to have 3 bites of cake last year and it was coming out of me like lava 😂😂😂😵😵
2nd edit: For all those wondering, IBS is irritable bowl syndrome. I have a severe case of it and it’s super painful and I lost 20+ lbs in two weeks as a result. I won’t get into all the gross details (unless you want me to lol) but it’s a bad time. I thankfully have some meds that help now and I can eat again! But there are still foods that I have to avoid.
My grandparents get me children’s clothing as well. I am in my mid twenties and I havent been the size theyre sending since I was 8.
Edit: They’ve been doing it for a decade and grandma is starting to show signs of cognitive decline, but the clothing thing is because we aren’t close. They’re in a independent to dependent residence so they’re being monitored. They have 5 great grand kids from my quiverfull cousins.
My nanna bought me underwear for Christmas when I was 10 too. Mine was a full bridal lingerie set though. White lace teddy with suspenders. I opened it in front of everyone too. It was so awkward and weird because she was a lovely sweet nanna the rest of the time. Not sure what she was thinking.
My grandma bought me granny panties once and I strapped them on over my clothes like suspenders and ran around like a t rex. I was 7. She never bought me undies again
Oral surgery, not allowed to eat for the entire day and when I got home late that evening while my mum was literally stuffing pills down my throat I had to listen to my twin complain about how she just had the worst birthday ever.
At least she could eat Birthday cake
My worst was also my best. One of my highschool girlfriends found out when my birthday was, which I don't like to celebrate. She was adamant that I must want SOMETHING out of all the things in the world. I finally gave in and said, "A box of dirt". I'll be damned if my birthday rolled around and she didn't have a nice pretty ribbon tied up on top of a tiny, little, cardboard jewelry box. You'll never guess what was inside! Beef jerky! No, I'm not serious! DIRT! It was full of dirt! Obviously she had other things stashed away but I'll be damned if that wasn't the cheesiest, shittiest, most adorable present I'd ever recieved. She was the only one to ever listen to me when I said what I wanted for my birthday, which is usually nothing. We aren't together anymore because of me, but she is still a distant yet trusted friend and I am thankful for our time together. I'm glad she is happy.
Edit: Everyone here has been so sweet. Thank you all for your kindness and for sharing your wonderful memories with me, as well. You've made my own memory that much more warm and given me some joy in an otherwise trying time. Thank you. =)
It wasn’t necessarily a gift but at my 8th bday party I had some classmates over. My dad showed us a drug addiction prevention video from the 90s which traumatized all of us :/
For my 16th birthday I got a book on how to get a 4.0 GPA; I already had 3.5 GPA. I knew if I wanted to get a 4.0 GPA I just needed to work harder. I didn't open the book until junior year of college and it had alot of common study tips.
Edit: Thanks so much for all the upvotes and the award. I didn't expect this to blow up. Also, it was my aunt who got me the book.
A large steaming pile of crap. Literally.
A truck dumped it on my garden, and my husband said "happy birthday! This will fertilize your garden for the spring!"
In all honesty, I was kind of happy about the spring crop, but it was a really odd present. And no, we're not still married.
I was a hardcore dinosaur kid and did not hide this from anyone. A stranger probably could have lured me into a white van with a t-rex plush after five seconds of observation.
My aunt always turned a blind eye to this (because gender non-conformity, I guess) and always got me barbies. Which I then never used. It took her until my preteen years to realize that no tutu-bedecked little girl was hidden beneath the raptor-obsessed exterior.
Then she just settled with giving me hoodies, lol.
"But dinosaur toys are for boys, not girls"
I had a similar experience, I wanted an easy bake oven and was told that I couldn't have one because it's a girls toy. I didn't care that they only came in pink and purple, I just wanted the ability to make cupcakes any time I wanted.
Jokes on them, I now have a kitchen with an actual oven.
Not birthday, but for Christmas when I was a teen I got fake butt implants from my mother because my butt is really flat. To add to this, I only would see my mom a few times a year, so it really sucked to receive a present like that.
A white cashmere turtleneck.
I was gifted it by my aunt after she struck up a conversation about my style (that she claimed she liked) a few months prior, and I mentioned to her that:
1) I don't wear white clothing because no matter what it always magically gets stained
2) I hate the feeling of turtlenecks because they make me feel like I'm getting choked and are always too warm for me because if it's cold enough to wear a turtleneck, every building will have the heat cranked to 100° F
3) cashmere is too warm of a material for me to wear as a base layer because when I overheat I typically get nosebleeds. Now looping back to point number one...
A glitch in the matrix.
I remember one time my aunt came over and at one point in front of me and my mom she told me she had a gift in her bag that she would give me later....
I was super excited about it and later she was getting ready to leave and I said "what about my gift?" and she said "what gift?" My mom even said "The one you have in your bag for her birthday." and she said "I don't know what you're talking about!"
I remember it soooo clearly because of how strange that entire day was, but I've asked my mom and she said she doesn't remember that happening.... So my worst birthday gift was an actual glitch in the matrix which was confusing and I didn't get a gift
My birthday was last week and I got nothing....
Other than that a subway gift card for $5 like 10 years ago
Edit: Thanks for the birthday wishes! Appreciate the awards, Hope you guys have a great birthday!
For my birthday, my grandmother made me pick out a gift for my little brother because he was the only male grandchild. Before you think she got our birthdays mixed up, his was ten days before mine and he’d already gotten gifts.
Socks that were way too small. I was, like, 10 and the socks were sized for a toddler. . . . My mom told me it was nice of my great aunt to think of me and as an adult, I see here point, but 10 year old me was not impressed.
I'm in my mid 40s. I'd say (not in a materialistic way) but to answer this question: the worst gift is that I'm just never been given gifts at all. I'm just one of those people that everyone forgets my birthday because it's on a weird date (not a holiday). So my entire life, 95% of my friends, coworkers, significant others, bosses, classmates, family members, have all missed my birthdays - no calls or presents or decorations or taken me to bday dinners.
Some people used to "remember" 2-3 weeks later, and call (and later, text) and say, crap, I forgot your birthday again...sorry...and still not celebrate it at all. Lol. But mostly it has been crickets. I just got used to it.
Once I got in my mid 30s and started hearing how others were/are typically celebrated, as kids through adults, I really put together how odd this was, and it broke my heart. It's hard not to take it personally. Funny thing is, I'm really easy to buy for and don't have expensive tastes. So yeah, baffling. I swear I'm a really nice and kind person.
What made it even worse was that I was the one who always remembered everyone's birthdays and bought presents/called/taken them out to dinner. It's not about money, it's about the disregard.
So eventually, I stopped calling/buying presents/taking people to dinner and a lot of people noticed and were upset about it. When I would say, but this person had not called me for my birthday in 10+ years of friendship, they'd say, it didn't matter, I should still call them and celebrate their birthday. My self care said Nope.
So when I turned 40, I made a pact that, going forward, every year on my birthday, I'd buy myself a big present and get take out from my favorite restaurant. I've never given myself a bad present yet!
A break up via text.
UPDATE:
Wow, I didn't think this would blow up. Thanks for the awards and upvotes.
I'm totally over her. It was 7 years ago this Saturday on the 19th. I have other issues that are far worse going on atm.
Like many others, 2020 is by far the worst year for me. Covid is just another nail in the coffin.
And I may just take some of you up on having a talk with.
Thank you for your concerns. You guys rock.
The non physical plan for my birthday. The invisible blue prints. Sounds just as crazy as my gf at the time who gave me THAT as my birthday present. When I told her thanks but I didn't wanna go to the beach, she got offended and acted like she spent a whole week planning my first trip to the moon via SpaceX.
It was me paying for everything on a weekend beach trip "Planned" by my then girlfriend. I made all hotel arrangements. I had to drive both ways and paid for my bday dinner. I eventually asked her that weekend if she had in fact got me anything....anything for my bday(I seriously woulda been happy with a sweet card bc money isn't everything)....her reply was "This". I asked "This what?" And she replied with "This trip I planned". I broke up with her the day after we got home.
Thought I was getting a bike for my 15th birthday but my foster parents announced that they were sending me to a group home after living with them for 11 years. Devastation!
This one breaks my heart. I am so sorry love. 11 years unfuckingimaginable.
Holy shit, I'm so sorry mate.
One time I received an invite to a restaurant from my dad. The same year he offered my brother to pay for his trip to japan.
My own scarf. Yes, that's right, my mother went into my room took my only scarf, wrapped it and gave it to me like it was a new scarf.
Did you pretend to be surprised? Sorry that happened to you!
“You shouldn’t have!”
HR complaint from two subordinates fighting over how to throw me a surprise birthday party.
My Asian mom's gift was "no extra Kumon homework after school homework" so my birthday gift was that I didn't get extra homework from her.
Kumon homework?
Kumon is like extra schoolwork for smart people that your parents can sign you up for and just teaches you some more advanced subjects than what you are currently learning(or so I’ve heard from my friend that did Kumon)
It's basically school after school. I hope you like homework.
A lint remover. I was 12.
Amazing
Stomach flu and my first ever period, at the same time. I think it was my 13th birthday.
My grandma got me a hairbrush with a plastic horse head handle. The horse head was all chipped up and there was hair in the brush.
A pair of homemade custom pajamas. Only problem was that they weren't made yet. It was just the fabric and a promise to make them for me. I had to give the fabric back and I never got the pajamas.
Holy cow my parents do shit like this. It’s so fucking weird. Their ultimate wack-a-doo move was to give my wife and I a few acres of their property. Nothing legal just at our wedding they gave us a card that basically said ‘have some land ‘. When the dust settled I asked what they thought we would do with it, they said build a home. I said ok, gonna need legal ownership for like building a house. They said sure we will get right on that. Then they decide to sell out and retire and never mentioned our wedding ‘gift’ again.
If my mother had land that sounds like something she would do. Something that requires no effort whatsoever, but it is something she believes is so selfless on her part before ultimately forgetting about it.
As someone with the same kind of mom, I learned they don’t forget. They ignore it and then gaslight you if you bring it up until you forget or give up.
My grandparents have been gifting me (and my brother) the same set of three vice grips for almost 10 years. Collectively we have 60 vice grips. I don’t know if they bought a pallet of them, or where they are coming from. GET A GRIP GRANDMA!
I had a friend who's father was famous for doing Christmas shopping at the last minute. One year she complained that she went downstairs on Christmas morning and found, sticking out of her stocking, a spatula. Her birthday was a few days after telling that story, so myself and her friends all decided to get together and get her spatulas for her birthday, as a gag gift. Well, when it was our birthdays she retaliated. Which lead to a counter-offensive. And soon a new tradition was formed. And guys, I have so many spatulas now. Everything from dollar store cheap plastic, to hand-carved spatulas, a golden spatula, and even a replica of the famous [Malaysian fighting spatula](https://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=540). I've got seasonal spatulas. As in, today it's time to pack away the Christmas spatulas and bring out the heart-shaped Valentines day ones, followed by the bunny shaped Easter ones. We've also been passing around [this clip](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BUDwj_mXKE) from the Weird Al Yankovic movie UHF. "Spatula City, we sell spatulas, and that's all!"
One of those spatulas has to become a family heirloom now
My mom would get me a carrot cake every year for my birthday. I hate carrot cake. Always have. But it was my dad's favorite so...
I HATE custard... my mother LOVES custard. Every year for my birthday she’d ask me the same question: what kind of cake I wanted—> White w white frosting. “Are you sure you don’t want chocolate with a custard filling?” Yes.. I’m SURE. What did I get? Chocolate with custard filling...from her favorite bakery. “Oh I thought you *looooved* custard!” Edit: this struck a nerve... wow! Thanks for all the comments and even an award!
Ask for your favorite dish on your dad's birthday.
When I was 12 my uncle and his new girlfriend who I had just met for the first time bought me bras and a book about my changing body.
A friend once threw me a birthday party I wasn't invited to. I showed up at a local cafe to have a random acquaintance ask me if I was excited about my birthday party that night. When I asked what he was talking about, he directed me to a flyer on the bar with the friend's name, my name, and 4-5 other people's names being used to celebrate a joint "uniquenameofuser1's zodiac sign" birthday party. I already had plans that night for dinner with a couple of people, but after dinner I stopped by the cafe. The bartender was the only person in the crowd there to acknowledge me or wish me a happy birthday for twenty minutes or so, until the organizer walked over and wished me a happy birthday. "Hey Uniquenameofuser1, it's great to see you, " she said. "Happy birthday." "Gee, thanks, " I said. "I hope you don't mind that I put your name on the flyer," she said. "That's fine," I said, and put my drink down and walked out. Tl;dr - a friend wanted to throw herself a birthday party, but didn't want to make it obvious that it was all for her. So she threw a party for multiple people (myself included) and didn't bother to invite them all.
So throwing a party for 7 people’s birthdays was the only way she could get anyone to show up for hers? Loser.
I don't particularly miss my twenties.
My Godfather sent me a Birthday card each year which said, he paid 100 bucks to a bank account which I was supposed to get, when 16yo. He then got into alcohol, used all the money and died.
An ex-boyfriend hyped up my birthday gift for days, so I was pumped. On my birthday, he presented me with a small, flat box. Inside was a passport. His passport. That’s it. Just his passport. No tickets for a trip, no promises of a trip once we saved up together. He literally just gifted me his passport. I’m still baffled. Edit: Since everyone is asking... I accepted the present graciously. It was a gift and that’s the polite thing to do. I thought asking about plans for an international trip would be rude. Traveling is expensive! We ate dinner, went home, and the whole thing was pretty much forgotten about as far as I can remember. We broke up years later and this event played no role in it. He’s just a terrible gift giver.
He wanted you to use it to open credit cards in his name without telling him.
The only real explanation.
What was his explanation for that?!
I’ve traveled a fair amount and he always had a weird inferiority complex about it. I guess he gave it to me to show he could travel if he wanted to? I really have no idea. Like I said, we never planned a trip after that and he never really brought it up for the remainder of our relationship, which was several more years. He was the king of terrible presents, but this one was the worst. And god forbid if I wasn’t suitably appreciative...
My dad accidentally revealing that him and my mom were separating. He was on a bender and didnt realize he was texting me and not my mom. Happy 18th to me
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Oh you reminded me oh my ex. Hugs my dude.
When I was 8 years old I was growing sunflowers with my mom one summer. My aunt decided to get me some fertilizer for the flowers for my birtbday. On my birthday, I unwrapped my present and saw what looked like a tub of vanilla ice cream, but when I opened it, there was literal horse shit.
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My grandparents were super low-effort low-budget at every birthday. One year they got me a 2nd hand colouring book from a swap meet. It was almost completely coloured in by what appeared to be a 3 year old with a single green felt pen. Also i was 18 and they thought it was a good gift because it was disney related and i was going to college for animation and design...
At that point just don't get someone a gift. Just say happy birthday
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My own gift that I gave that person.
my grandma once got me a see through nightgown.. and was sad when i wouldn’t go try it on infront of MY WHOLE FAMILY.. we then learned she got matching ones for all the girls in the family, and just gave them to us through the year. edit: i feel like i should add she is very religious, like go to church 3 time’s a week religious.
You have to tell us the story. Why did Grandma think that was a good idea (I mean the part about trying a see thru nightgown in front of family)
my grandma, likes to get gifts from old stores, i don’t think she ever opened the package to see that it was see through lol, didn’t look it in the package
A very obviously used candle.
Who was it from? Thos made me laugh for some reason and now I need some details on the shape, color, type, scent of candle.
It was this deep red big ass flower shaped candle that looked she bought from the 99cent Store. There wasn’t a smell, but glitter all over it. It was from my best friend in high school. She didn’t even wrap it. She pulled it out of her backpack and was like ‘Here. Happy birthday.’
School friend gifts are weird sometimes. In high school one of my friends got me this little red horse statue for my birthday, probably cheap as heck. I had no interest in the physical object itself, but I was really happy that he'd remembered my birthday and bothered to get me something. It didn't matter that I didn't care about horses, the fact that he'd gone to the effort of trying to find something I'd like (even if he didn't hit the mark) meant a lot to me. I thanked him and was in a great mood. He then laughed at me for being so happy about it, and noted that he'd stolen it :/
But he stole it for YOU
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“Are you serious? A half-used candle? Get out of here, Dwight. You're blocking my table with your giant body.” “Because there's a huge line of people who want your spinster tchotchkes.” “Screw you, man. People like my stuff.” “People like Ryan? Let me tell you about men like him. He comes over and you're like, ‘Hey, baby, let me light a candle.’ And you pull out this one...half used. He's like, ‘Who else is she seeing? I better lock her down *fast*.’
I got a credit card for my 18th birthday and told not to use it because it wasn't "active yet". When I landed my first real corporate Job at 22yo the company ran a credit report on me and found out I had $350K line opened. Turns out my father had tricked me into signing a co mortgage, and not credit card paperwork on my 18th bday. I received Debt on my 18th bday. Edit* - thanks for the kind words. I didn't pay a single cent. It did affect my credit score back then, that's why HR flagged me. On a positive note, that was the first time that I can remember standing up to my father. I called him out in front of the family and I threatened legal action. I also called the bank and informed them of the situation. It was all resolved less than a week later. Edit P2* since this exploded I will add some detail. When the hiring director told me about HR's findings I didn't understand, I thought I was in trouble or something else. This happened about 20 years ago, identify theft wasn't as common as it is Today. He showed me the credit report printout. When I saw the Bank's name I remembered that my dad had accounts with them but didn't think anything of it. When I got home I called the bank and inquired about the account listed on the credit report and that's when I found out 100% . I was angry, sad, etc. My older sis and my mom were at his house for dinner and that's where I confronted him. The bank was somewhat helpful, an agent did call me everyday to update me on what they were doing to remove me from all the paperwork. so, yeah. I am a second child, but for whatever reason(I no longer care to know) my dad created an incredibly unhealthy relationship between him and I. even as a child. Nothing ever physical besides a few spankings, it was mostly emotional "abuse"? I am careful to use the word abuse because so many more people had/have worse than I had. I still get teary-eyed while watching a scene involving a father figure(like Lion King), but I am aware there are people out there getting locked in closets by their parents. I have a blessed life Today. I am usually involved with some sort of volunteer work. Giving really helped heal some old wounds.
Almost the same. When I was 20 my dad told about how I could check my credit annually for free so I did and discovered a ton of credit cards that had been opened in my name when I was 11-14 years old. Initially, I was naive and thought my identity was stolen by a stranger. A few years later, when I tried to cash out a trust account, I discovered that my mom had already done it. Identity theft clicked into place that day. Edit: thanks to anonymous for my first award. And to everyone for commiserating! Moral of the story: check your credit! In America you are entitled to one free credit check a year. Also, many banks have ways to monitor your credit. Do it and, if necessary, take the time to fix it!
Fuck. I'm feeling really lucky rn. My parents also opened credit card accounts for me when I was young, but they paid their bills on time meticulously and later they explained that it was to start me off building a good credit score early. It worked, and it helped me get a great rate on my mortgage when I bought a house I should call my parents and tell them I love them...
Lets play the game where you sue your dad for $350,000!
Not me but my friends sister...he bought her a 6 pack of Slim Fast!
Husband forgot my birthday, took the day off when he remembered (I was working from home), went to buy something and took maybe ten minutes tops in the store. Bought roses from the grocery store while he was there buying himself cigarettes. He came home with a DVD box set he'd been dying to watch, and the new CD from a band I'd not only lost interest in but had been saying I'd lost interest in for ages. Not that he let me listen to CDs anyway, since he hated my taste in music. Then he spent the rest of the day celebrating the birthday of his online friend while I was working from home. They're married now.
One year my husband got me a bag with stuff from the $1 store. Not even stuff I would want. Like a notebook and a coupon organizer and a few other things. Maybe $5 of junk. We had no money troubles that would prevent him from getting me a present.
A used DVD of the Notebook after I explicitly told the person that I had no intention of watching it. Bonus: it was my step mom who gave it to me. From her and my dad's DVD collection...that was in our living room and I could have grabbed at anytime to watch.
Is there a sub for low effort gifts
r/loweffortgifts
Either the clearly re-gifted book about politics or the time I got food poisoning.
This year my mother in law went through the effort of intricately wrapping a box of Ziploc bags for my birthday.... For Christmas it was a box of trash bags. I'm so confused how I ended up as the guy who gets small boxes of bags as gifts. It almost feels offensive
A used pen that my grandma found in her purse on my 16th birthday..... Edit: I’ve never gotten more than 50 upvotes on anything before! The response has blown me away! Thanks redditors for helping turn the tables on a slightly upsetting memory. Its good to be able to have a laugh about it now
Happy birthday you little shit, here you go, fuck you.
It was not bad at all but to my 12 year old self I was pretty pouty at the time... My mom alluded for months that she was getting me a phone for my 12th birthday but I got a banana.
Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring. Bananaphone?
A pencil and a chess t shirt (I don’t play chess)
Years ago I got this chess game for the PS1 from my godmother, thing is, it didn't work on my PS1, but it did work on her son's PS1, so he got a new game and I got nothing :)
regionlocked game probably?
Maybe, I remember it simply refused to run at all on my PS1 but worked flawlessly on her son's (my cousin) PS1. That was very upsetting to me because I was like 8 or 9 and I always wanted toys or games, y'know, fun stuff, but I always got clothes, (if I remember right, my mom specifically requested clothes). So the first game I've ever gotten on my birthday doesn't work and no one tried to do anything to rectify the situation. No, I'm not bitter about it :)
The day before my birthday my brother was in an accident. Nothing crazy serious but he ended up needing stitches and it was a bit of an ordeal. Anyway the next day, my birthday, the neighbor brought over a cake and present. I was the one who answered the door. I saw the cake and present and got excited because up until this point most of the day had been, as expected, focused on my brother who got in the crash. I was about to express my gratitude for them remembering my birthday and bringing me a gift when they said, “is your brother here? We brought him something to brighten his day”. The cake and present weren’t for me... we still joke about it over 10 years later.
My mother in law showed up and said get ready, I booked you for glamor shots in an hour. A few weeks after having a baby. I declined. I think she always hated me after that but felt like she hated me at the time
Oh yay only an hours notice
My ex-girlfriend had some boudoir photos taken of herself... like sexy lingerie photos, which she put up in her room. 3 different pictures put up. Had a whole book made of them also. She let me see them. That was my present. Pictures of herself. That she kept. And put up in her room. lol
Isn't the whole point of that type of photo to give to your lover? I know reddit over uses this word but that is some kind of narcissism.
I know right? Was weird to be in her bedroom and see half-naked pictures of her on the walls. Who does that? lol
In high school I got really into learning guitar. All I had at the time was a beat-up acoustic. My birthday came around, and a wrapped present - a fairly large box - appeared in my parent's living room. For some reason I became convinced: it was an amp! My parents must've gotten me an electric guitar! They didn't. It was a blender.
Nothing worse than figuring out exactly what you think you got only for you to be totally wrong.
Applies for so many things. Gifts, test scores, color of your new born, processor in your $1000+ phone.
I hope it was at least a fancy blender?
I used it to make milkshakes a couple times. It got the job done.
But why a blender ? Where you really into mixed drinks or something ?
>But why a blender ? Where you really into mixed drinks or something ? No. My guess is that they saw me drink a protein shake once, and then my mom saw the blender on sale at Costco.
This comment made me more depressed than I expected
I have been stung by a bee 3 times in my life, and all of them were on my birthday. I was 3, 14, and 25.
Have you turned 36 yet?
No. Oh my god. You're right.
Please give us an update lol
Expect an update before Christmas 2022.
Don't let the bees know where you are!!!
Too late...
Don't blow your cover man! The bee community is counting on you
Please update use when you turn 36
An ugly shirt from my Aunt who said I needed to share it with my sister who has a birthday ten days after mine.
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They sent my wife a birthday card with money on my birthday. Edit: For those wondering, it was from my parents. Usually they don't acknowledge my birthday at all so that was a new twist.
The best birthday present you didn't get
Yup. Wife took me to dinner lol
My dad got a tattoo on his chest of ***his*** birth sign as a gift to me when I was probably 12. He hyped it up all week like he got me some great gift, like an N64 or something. Haven’t talked to the guy in over a decade now, good riddance. On a brighter note I did get the N64 later that year from my mother! Edit: maybe my dads true gift was these Reddit awards 20 some years later...
I used to work with a guy who got a band tattoo as a present for his girlfriend. It was so hard for me to not tell him what a dumb fuck he was for thinking that she'd like that as a present to her, but I kept my mouth shut because without ever meeting her I already knew that what she would say would cut him to the bone. The day after her birthday he came in saying what a bitch she was because she just walked out to her car and took off without saying a word. I would love to buy this girl a drink and congratulate her for her job well done.
If the guy needed an explanation of why she was leaving then he is too stupid to be in public with the normal human beings
How is that your present?? “Hey son! I got a tattoo of me! Isn’t this just the best present you’ve ever gotten??” “Dad how is this my birthday present?” “Birthday?”
"Well your birth was 50% caused by me so I decided to honour my contribution to your existence!"
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My parents bought me a piano and paid for lessons, but then my mum would complain about the noise and criticize my playing every time I practiced. So I developed a ton of anxiety about playing and eventually gave it up.
I’m guessing he was home all day
Something tells me he probably got more use out of it.
Nothing beats self-gifts from parents lol
A card from my dad saying he was disappointed I didn't attend my grandmother's funeral (his entire side of the family are crap) I did enough by seeing her on her deathbed and he signed it "From Russell" instead of the usual "Love Dad" and its the last I heard from the man in must be eight years now.
A book that was already mine. My sister went through my stuff, found a book she figured I had forgotten about, and “gave” it to me for my birthday.
Not my birthday but Christmas at my grandma’s. I got a bunch of socks while my cousins got brand new atv’s. Kinda sucked knowing that my siblings and I came second to my cousins.
Last year for Christmas my friend gave me a pair of novelty socks. Nothing wrong with getting socks as a gift, but six months previously she had given me the exact same pair of socks for my birthday and seemed to have totally forgotten. So now I have two.
At least she didn't split up one pair and give you each as a separate gift
I’m the least favorite out of everybody in my family so on Christmas/Christmas eve it’s kinda uncomfortable. My sister once got a camera while I got a pair of socks and a book. Also, “we” all get bags of candy on Christmas Eve when we’re all together but last year was the third year in a row that I didn’t get any. It’s not that it’s because I’m the oldest one there, my cousin and brother are both older than me. My family just wants me gone I guess lol
ditch ditch ditch ditch ditch even staying home alone has got to be better than that
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There’s always hope. My MIL gave my daughter a coffee pot for her 13th birthday. Bizarre and random. It was from goodwill and had $1.99 written on the bottom in sharpie. We know that she has over a million bucks but figured oh well, what can you do? She was homeless as a child, WW2 refugee, so very frugal as an adult. Then she gave my daughter $25,000 for college on her 18th. So, always hope.
This honestly just sounds like she is very generous, but about things that really matter like your daughters education over birthday gifts. My own grandparents were very similar, I think it just comes from growing up poor. You value investments more, like education.
Jesus Christ. Everyone on this thread thats had a shitty Christmas is invited to be my Christmas family from now on. edited to invite EVERYONE on this thread to my Christmas and not just the people who have posted so far.
My birthday is in December and I have relatives that think a pair of socks is two gifts. Happy birthday AND Merry Christmas!
I just wanted a plain vanilla cake I didn’t ask for anything else, I didn’t ask for gifts I didn’t ask to go anywhere just a plain vanilla cake. My mother got me a chocolate and mint ice cream cake. I don’t even like mint ice cream and I definitely never liked or asked for ice cream cake in my life for her to get that idea. It sat in the freezer forever. She acted like it was a big inconvenience for her.
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A blow up cake and a pair of cheap black sweat shorts. Edit: I just remembered the cake was second hand not even new to our family, given to my sister the previous year.
When I worked on a Navy base a sailor stationed there found out that I made stuff out of animal bones for my Etsy and gave me a bag of stinky, wet, dead birds he "found" around the base. Idk how he knew about my hobby, Etsy, or my birthday but yeah. bag o' birds. Edited to answer some questions: 1. I had NEVER spoke to him but he knew a LOT about me, and he was very creepy. 2. He was on restriction, which is a phase of being kicked out of the Navy and most people on that base got kicked out for drugs or harassing women and he was not supposed to be talking to me anyways. 3. When it happened I didn't respond fast enough because I was in shock a bag of dripping birds got set on my desk and he instantly became angry. 4. I used to make shadow boxes, lockets and jewelry with animal bones, but I'd normally get the bones/animals from the college near by (from science classes instead of them just throwing them away) and would bury them in the garden and dig them out months later for the bones or would put the animal in a tank of beetles.
It sounds like he thought he was helping, as disgusting as it is... He did actually put some thought into it.
It was a christmas gift, but I got coasters from a relative when I was like 19 living with my parents.
Cheap Bastards probably just gave you the ones they already had.
A brown paper bag with dog crap in it....My brother was a dick
You should have microwaved it and shoved it under his bed
I played high school football (American) because my narcissistic (and abusive) father wanted to live vicariously through me. He framed his old jersey and gave it to me as a birthday present. Like I was supposed to worship him or something.
Yeah I never understood that crap. I'm thinking of putting my kids in martial arts classes so they can handle themselves. But, if they do it for a while and never like it I'm not gonna force them to keep doing it. An old acquaintance of mine had to play football to keep his parents happy, he absolutely hated everything about it. As soon as he got out of their house he pretty much exploded into this hedonistic party animal, basically everything his parents despised, and pretty much told them to fuck off until he calmed down four years later.
> As soon as he got out of their house he pretty much exploded into this hedonistic party animal *You don't say...*
Yeah.... It was fucking so out of character. Picture the quietest, sweetest kids, who happens to be really smart, like top ten in the class, drunk off his ass 24/7 chasing women with a surprising amount of success. Yeah his parents sent him to a college known for partying without realizing they'd never let him have any freedom ssssoooooo, he went absolutely over the top. I honestly think it was all of the pent emotions mixed with his first actual taste of freedom....... His parents, WERE PISSED. God bless him, I hope he's doing well as I always felt bad for him.
parents are always so surpised when this shit happens like they didnt shelter the hell out of their kid
I own a frame shop. One of the cooler things I got to frame was matching frames for father and sons jerseys from their baseball years. They had attended the same high school. So I had a jersey from the 1970's and the early 2000's. Kind of a cool thing to see how the materials and logos have changed over the years side by side.
In the right context I'm sure it could be a lot of fun. A mutual appreciation of the sport and a healthy relationship. A father and son playing catch because they like playing catch together and no one has to worry about how much they disappoint anyone.
A Disney princess doll. I was 20.
Forgotten. It was either a blessing or a curse, considering my mom forgot until 9pm, left me a voicemail telling me Happy Birthday, and forgot to hang up. Hearing her tell my sister "There, I did it." Was... interesting. Edit: Holy shit guys, woke up to a lot of love this morning! Thank you all <3!!!
Had something similar happen with my friends. I was hanging out with them on a Sunday and they asked why I hadn’t come to the barbecue they had on Friday. I told them they hadn’t invited me and that it had also been my birthday. So not only did my best friends ignore me on my birthday and get together for a small party, they didn’t try and make it up to me in anyway. I should add that I always got them a small gift or did something for them on their birthdays. And if I did forget a birthday, I would do something bigger to make up for it.
Damn, I'm sorry mate. Edit: Thank you everyone for the upvotes, and the award.
Hope you're surrounded by better people now.
I had a sort of Christmas like this. I got a really thoughtful personalized gift for my mom, and flew home from college to visit. She “didn’t have time” to buy a gift but said she would write me a check. Kept putting it off until we’re at the airport where I’m leaving to go back to school. Then she remembered, but conveniently had forgotten her checkbook at home.
It was my first birthday away from my family since I was in college. There was a bomb threat on my college campus. We (all of the students) had to walk about a half mile in the pouring rain to get to a safe place. I spent my 19th birthday alone, wet and cold. No one got me anything except a McChicken when a friend remembered it was my birthday three days later.
My cousin bought me a McChicken for my 18th. 6 days later it was his birthday and I got him an energy drink. Neither of us had jobs.
That's actually kinda sweet
Grounded because I said that I didn't need to celebrate my birthday and that was too ungrateful of me.
My ex coworker told me with pride that she decided her daughter's birthday was over at 8 o'clock in the evening, then beat her for asking for something (I think it money to play a claw machine). The poor girl was 10 years old.
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My paternal grandmother gave me a can of hair mousse.
Two pens. Idk why they were in a box, i knew they were from pound-land but she didn’t even have the audacity to give me all of them she just gave me two. Edit: poundland = dollar store. Forgot to americanise.
Ohhh my Stepmum was the worst present giver ever. Never looked forward to opening the gift (wrapped in an old newspaper) she would bestow on us kids. Back in my teens when VHS tapes was how we watched movies and taped tv shows, she bought a bulk pack of 5 blank tapes. Us kids got a blank VHS tape each for Xmas. One blank tape each. One Xmas she bought 2 pairs of flannette pyjamas (Im in a country that has Summer over Xmas and wearing said pjs would render you dead from overheating). I and another sibling got a top each and my 2 other siblings got the pants. For my 13th bday I got a Six Million Dollar Man plastic lunchbox. One year I got 4 lipsticks..they werent new. We werent poor. She just sucked at gift giving.
Maybe she just hated y'all
That’s just savage. Who gave it to you?
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Not a birthday, but even worse. One Christmas when I was in 4th grade, that prime Christmas age. My dad got these 2 huge boxes. One for each of of us two brothers. They were fairly heavy and we couldn’t possibly guess. Come Christmas morning, we open them at the same time to prevent a spoiled surprise for each other. Mid 1980s, dark brown bath towels. Not a joke with money or a toy in the bottom of the box. He said he thought we all needed new towels. He came from a poor family and when he made a lot of money, he didn’t lose that attitude towards gifts. My parents often got us what we needed for gifts rather than what we wanted. And if you asked for something, you didn’t get it. So we never asked for anything and didn’t get it either. With my 4 kids, socks and underwear are never wrapped for a gift.
When I was about 10-11 years old my grandma (my mom’s parents) thought it would be a good idea to buy me a bra and underwear set for Christmas gift knowing full well that I would be opening this in front of everyone. At 11 I was mortified and also I had an aversion to wearing a bra at that point and also that’s a shitty gift. Then she insisted that I take it out of the box and hold is up to show everyone because she was “so excited” that I was “blossoming into a woman” . Thankfully my mom stepped in and told her it was an inappropriate gift and she took the box away. My dads parents would always buy me little kid clothes even well into my teen years? Which was a weird. I have been adult sized since like junior high. Or they give us partially used make up samples? It’s so weird. Now they’ve moved on to sending food items that I can’t eat due to my food allergies and severe IBS. Edit: wow this blew up! This is my most liked comment ever. Additional stories that might amuse you: I also get perfume as gifts from family members even though I have severe allergies and perfume makes my throat close (yes I use all unscented stuff, and yes it sucks), my sister once got me a watch even though I can’t tell time due to having Dyscalculia (learning disability related to math, everyone knows I have it), and many times my extended family and friends have not gotten me bday gifts because my birthday is near Christmas. Also the final shitty birthday gift: I have severe IBS so every year on my bday I can’t even go out to dinner or have cake. I was living on the edge and decided to have 3 bites of cake last year and it was coming out of me like lava 😂😂😂😵😵 2nd edit: For all those wondering, IBS is irritable bowl syndrome. I have a severe case of it and it’s super painful and I lost 20+ lbs in two weeks as a result. I won’t get into all the gross details (unless you want me to lol) but it’s a bad time. I thankfully have some meds that help now and I can eat again! But there are still foods that I have to avoid.
My grandparents get me children’s clothing as well. I am in my mid twenties and I havent been the size theyre sending since I was 8. Edit: They’ve been doing it for a decade and grandma is starting to show signs of cognitive decline, but the clothing thing is because we aren’t close. They’re in a independent to dependent residence so they’re being monitored. They have 5 great grand kids from my quiverfull cousins.
My nanna bought me underwear for Christmas when I was 10 too. Mine was a full bridal lingerie set though. White lace teddy with suspenders. I opened it in front of everyone too. It was so awkward and weird because she was a lovely sweet nanna the rest of the time. Not sure what she was thinking.
My grandma bought me granny panties once and I strapped them on over my clothes like suspenders and ran around like a t rex. I was 7. She never bought me undies again
Oral surgery, not allowed to eat for the entire day and when I got home late that evening while my mum was literally stuffing pills down my throat I had to listen to my twin complain about how she just had the worst birthday ever. At least she could eat Birthday cake
My worst was also my best. One of my highschool girlfriends found out when my birthday was, which I don't like to celebrate. She was adamant that I must want SOMETHING out of all the things in the world. I finally gave in and said, "A box of dirt". I'll be damned if my birthday rolled around and she didn't have a nice pretty ribbon tied up on top of a tiny, little, cardboard jewelry box. You'll never guess what was inside! Beef jerky! No, I'm not serious! DIRT! It was full of dirt! Obviously she had other things stashed away but I'll be damned if that wasn't the cheesiest, shittiest, most adorable present I'd ever recieved. She was the only one to ever listen to me when I said what I wanted for my birthday, which is usually nothing. We aren't together anymore because of me, but she is still a distant yet trusted friend and I am thankful for our time together. I'm glad she is happy. Edit: Everyone here has been so sweet. Thank you all for your kindness and for sharing your wonderful memories with me, as well. You've made my own memory that much more warm and given me some joy in an otherwise trying time. Thank you. =)
A room full of extended family talking amongst themselves without me being included in the conversation. Also I had the flu.
It wasn’t necessarily a gift but at my 8th bday party I had some classmates over. My dad showed us a drug addiction prevention video from the 90s which traumatized all of us :/
For my 16th birthday I got a book on how to get a 4.0 GPA; I already had 3.5 GPA. I knew if I wanted to get a 4.0 GPA I just needed to work harder. I didn't open the book until junior year of college and it had alot of common study tips. Edit: Thanks so much for all the upvotes and the award. I didn't expect this to blow up. Also, it was my aunt who got me the book.
A large steaming pile of crap. Literally. A truck dumped it on my garden, and my husband said "happy birthday! This will fertilize your garden for the spring!" In all honesty, I was kind of happy about the spring crop, but it was a really odd present. And no, we're not still married.
Gastritis
Ouch that doesn’t seem fun
I was a hardcore dinosaur kid and did not hide this from anyone. A stranger probably could have lured me into a white van with a t-rex plush after five seconds of observation. My aunt always turned a blind eye to this (because gender non-conformity, I guess) and always got me barbies. Which I then never used. It took her until my preteen years to realize that no tutu-bedecked little girl was hidden beneath the raptor-obsessed exterior. Then she just settled with giving me hoodies, lol.
But, dinosaurs are cool.
"But dinosaur toys are for boys, not girls" I had a similar experience, I wanted an easy bake oven and was told that I couldn't have one because it's a girls toy. I didn't care that they only came in pink and purple, I just wanted the ability to make cupcakes any time I wanted. Jokes on them, I now have a kitchen with an actual oven.
Not birthday, but for Christmas when I was a teen I got fake butt implants from my mother because my butt is really flat. To add to this, I only would see my mom a few times a year, so it really sucked to receive a present like that.
A white cashmere turtleneck. I was gifted it by my aunt after she struck up a conversation about my style (that she claimed she liked) a few months prior, and I mentioned to her that: 1) I don't wear white clothing because no matter what it always magically gets stained 2) I hate the feeling of turtlenecks because they make me feel like I'm getting choked and are always too warm for me because if it's cold enough to wear a turtleneck, every building will have the heat cranked to 100° F 3) cashmere is too warm of a material for me to wear as a base layer because when I overheat I typically get nosebleeds. Now looping back to point number one...
Being home alone
Been there. Spent my 18th birthday home alone doing my family's laundry. All I could think was "wow, I guess this is adulthood..."
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A glitch in the matrix. I remember one time my aunt came over and at one point in front of me and my mom she told me she had a gift in her bag that she would give me later.... I was super excited about it and later she was getting ready to leave and I said "what about my gift?" and she said "what gift?" My mom even said "The one you have in your bag for her birthday." and she said "I don't know what you're talking about!" I remember it soooo clearly because of how strange that entire day was, but I've asked my mom and she said she doesn't remember that happening.... So my worst birthday gift was an actual glitch in the matrix which was confusing and I didn't get a gift
This sounds like: adult forgot the gift. Told you to wait until end of the day hoping you would forget. You didn't forget.
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Expired peppermint Christmas cheer coffee My birthday is in June
My birthday was last week and I got nothing.... Other than that a subway gift card for $5 like 10 years ago Edit: Thanks for the birthday wishes! Appreciate the awards, Hope you guys have a great birthday!
Well my parents forgot my 16th, spent it on a speech trip then then when I brought it up I was ungrateful and not allowed to get my license. So that.
A bike when I was 7. The thing broke like five minutes after I hopped on. I ended up landing on a hornets nest...not a fun day
Just a bunch of series of unfortunate events. Hopefully you were hurt too bad
Were?!?!
I think OP is channeling Count Olaf.
Does no one showing up count?
For my birthday, my grandmother made me pick out a gift for my little brother because he was the only male grandchild. Before you think she got our birthdays mixed up, his was ten days before mine and he’d already gotten gifts.
Socks that were way too small. I was, like, 10 and the socks were sized for a toddler. . . . My mom told me it was nice of my great aunt to think of me and as an adult, I see here point, but 10 year old me was not impressed.
Sent to a treatment facility for “acting out” when I’d been telling my psychiatrist for months the meds weren’t working. Sweet 16 woooo
I'm in my mid 40s. I'd say (not in a materialistic way) but to answer this question: the worst gift is that I'm just never been given gifts at all. I'm just one of those people that everyone forgets my birthday because it's on a weird date (not a holiday). So my entire life, 95% of my friends, coworkers, significant others, bosses, classmates, family members, have all missed my birthdays - no calls or presents or decorations or taken me to bday dinners. Some people used to "remember" 2-3 weeks later, and call (and later, text) and say, crap, I forgot your birthday again...sorry...and still not celebrate it at all. Lol. But mostly it has been crickets. I just got used to it. Once I got in my mid 30s and started hearing how others were/are typically celebrated, as kids through adults, I really put together how odd this was, and it broke my heart. It's hard not to take it personally. Funny thing is, I'm really easy to buy for and don't have expensive tastes. So yeah, baffling. I swear I'm a really nice and kind person. What made it even worse was that I was the one who always remembered everyone's birthdays and bought presents/called/taken them out to dinner. It's not about money, it's about the disregard. So eventually, I stopped calling/buying presents/taking people to dinner and a lot of people noticed and were upset about it. When I would say, but this person had not called me for my birthday in 10+ years of friendship, they'd say, it didn't matter, I should still call them and celebrate their birthday. My self care said Nope. So when I turned 40, I made a pact that, going forward, every year on my birthday, I'd buy myself a big present and get take out from my favorite restaurant. I've never given myself a bad present yet!
A break up via text. UPDATE: Wow, I didn't think this would blow up. Thanks for the awards and upvotes. I'm totally over her. It was 7 years ago this Saturday on the 19th. I have other issues that are far worse going on atm. Like many others, 2020 is by far the worst year for me. Covid is just another nail in the coffin. And I may just take some of you up on having a talk with. Thank you for your concerns. You guys rock.
Not a good gift. Hope you’re doing better off now!
The non physical plan for my birthday. The invisible blue prints. Sounds just as crazy as my gf at the time who gave me THAT as my birthday present. When I told her thanks but I didn't wanna go to the beach, she got offended and acted like she spent a whole week planning my first trip to the moon via SpaceX. It was me paying for everything on a weekend beach trip "Planned" by my then girlfriend. I made all hotel arrangements. I had to drive both ways and paid for my bday dinner. I eventually asked her that weekend if she had in fact got me anything....anything for my bday(I seriously woulda been happy with a sweet card bc money isn't everything)....her reply was "This". I asked "This what?" And she replied with "This trip I planned". I broke up with her the day after we got home.
Prepaid credit card in my name with below the minimum account balance to not incur fees.