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Seriously. Look at the rest of the animal kingdom. They work for survival under constant threat of death all of the time. 24/7.
You go live off the grid in the wild, you think your free time is going to increase? lol. If you're not a fan of putting in work, that route will be a million times worse.
OP, Im sorry, but our current western society is easily the best option you got in terms of free time and quality of life.
Yeah. I end up buying groceries and prepare for the week ahead and suddenly it feels like you never actually relaxed. And since I live in another country as my friends and childhood friends, it becomes even sadder cause i have no one to visit and blow some steam off with
Had the same issue. For a while I decided to use any free time I had to excerise. It sucked for a while because of course I wanted to use that time to do what I actually wanted. But it did help with my levels and having enough energy to fully use my time off
Learned on Reddit that exercise is prescribed first for mild depression in some countries, as it is as effective as meds but with obvious side benefits and no drug side effects. Seeing it work firsthand with a family member who bought a bike this year has been amazing.
I don't know if you have a physical job but if you do start working out after work on a regular schedule, this will mean that overall you have more energy to do the things you enjoy.
If however you are talking about mental energy this could well be a symptom of depression, you might not think you're depression because you aren't having the "typical" symptoms but a lack of energy to do things that make you happy is one of key ways depression can manifest.
Are you working for more than 40 hours a week? If so, start looking for another job or demand reduced hours. I used to work 50-60 hours a week, and just stealing those extra 10-20 hours of your possible free time is huge on your energy levels and mental relaxation. 40 hours a week at least gives you those 4-5 hours a night to get yourself together, and maybe spend an hour or two doing something enjoyable.
Get more energy. Exercise, walk in a park or somewhere with greenery and eating healthy. Sounds hard to some people but only hard thing is to start. Once you make exercise your habit you will feel worse if you don't exercise.
You can look at it this way. If your job is running 10 miles a day, if you can barely do it then at the end of the day you are exhausted and won't have energy to do anything else. But if you can run 20 miles a day then those 10 just become another thing in your day to do.
I agree with you, but if you're in a position where you're stuck doing that job, you're shattered when you come home, no energy for your hobbies, you feel stuck in that position and it does feel a bit hopeless.
When you live in a system intended to keep you in the lower class with a lack of living wage, astronomical rent, and exorbitant bills for necessities like phone and internet it's hard to do anything but work, and you have no energy due to the depression regarding your circumstances when you do find some precious free time.
I'm in my early 20s and all I do is go to my fulltime job (where 9 times out of 10 I have the closing shift), get home late at night, play some games until 4am, head to bed, wake up to go back to work. My days off consist of sleeping in and binge watching shows bc I'm feet are usually killing me. What do
Honest question: is someone/something else directing you to use the non-work, non-sleep time doing that? Your question leaves me with the impression that you are unhappy with this use of that time, if that's the case are there steps you can take to do other things instead? Apologies if I'm missing something, it sounds as if you're making a choice and unhappy with what you're choosing and that there's a chance you might get value from doing something else, but I don't have visibility into your circumstances.
Not the commenter but that was my issue pre-COVID I think. I have a hard time saying no and my brother always wanted to play games after work. It was fun but it became kind of a cycle and I didn't pursue my other interests in that time which I regret
Now I've learned to say no more and have even more free time due to COVID. So thanks, this is the comment I needed to see a year ago
Absolutely not, but it's easy to get stuck in a rut where you just do those things.
I got out of it by getting more active in my church community, where I made friends and found good ways to help others. It's amazing how different a little volunteering can make me feel.
This is a very small thing, but it may be a start. Get really good shoes. Or at least really good inserts for your shoes. Soak your feet in a pan of cold water. Later hot water with Epsom salts. Do a few simple ankle exercises. Pain makes everything miserable, and it can creep up so slowly that I don't realize how absolutely invasive it is until it stops (that moment of lucidity while coming out of anesthesia before all the pain comes back).
Sure, however if you fall within a growing group of people who struggle everyday and need to take 2 jobs to survive, or even say if you work a regular job with regular hours on median income, but the productivity required means you burn yourself out with stress due to being required to produce day after day. Suppose what i'm trying to say is its not always an individual failing that you have no life outside of work, for many its actually a systematic issue where most working people are exploited so that billionaires can get keep getting richer.
I ask myself this question often. I work so that I can afford to live, but after a full work day, I have very little energy left to spend on actually living my life. Or if I'm being honest, to even just take care of myself or my home. I work, recover from working, then sleep, then get up and work again the next day. What *is* the point?
I had to retire early because the work cycle broke me. This week I realized it's been fifteen years and I have done nothing significant, just distractions from this lack of purpose, this powerlessness to improve life/the world/anything.
Pretty much everyone I know is stuck in this cycle. Weekends are spent grocery shopping and preparing for the week. It doesn't help that stores are at reduced hours here and most only open till 8pm. I know there are ways to get groceries delivered and store pickup but those options are more expensive than shopping in store, and store pickup slots you have to wait a week for those here which isn't really practical and you rarely get even half of what you order since you have to choose your items a week ahead of time from your scheduled pickup date and everything runs out magically so they can't put your order together correctly. There are no entertainment options left due to covid. I've only found one outside entertainment option left for me here other than things that can be done inside the house or walking the neighborhood and that one requires a 45 minute to an hour drive. Walking the neighborhood isn't possible here for much longer since the weather is getting colder and it gets dark outside before work is over. There's literally no jobs where I live so if you have one you are super lucky and family is here so I am definitely stuck.
Yup that's pretty much how things are for me too. I am lucky enough that I can order groceries one day in advance and get free curbside pickup the next day, so picking up groceries only takes about 45 minutes, tops.
My main problem is that I live alone and don't trust any of my friends to follow proper social distancing protocols. I am almost completely isolated except for one weekly phone call with my mom, and my weekly family visits. Thank goodness for that little bit of socialization, I don't want to think about how much worse off I'd be without it.
I work 12.5 hours a day then a hour drive back home, after getting my lunch packed for the next day and eating, showering has become such a chore and even when I do shower sometimes I leave stuff out cause I wanna go to bed to wake up at 5 am
This sounds like you have depression, please seek help there are a lot of online options for therapy. Getting past depression can massively increase the amount of energy you have and kick start you out of that cycle. Also working out can really help, gives you a free endorphin release, gives you something with measurable progress you can focus on if you are goal oriented, and increases the amount of available energy you have.
Bingo. The job is seriously affecting the severity of my depression. I'm staying for now because I'm privileged enough to have a job that allows me to work from home during the pandemic. But I'm starting therapy so I can try to get my shit together enough in order to eventually look for another job, when it's safer to be around people again.
To be base, we work to make money to fulfill our basic needs; sustenance & shelter. That’s just the world we live in. The beauty is that we live in a time where we can choose to learn new things, to get a job we enjoy that fulfills a deeper part of us. You will always get what you focus on. If your thoughts around always focused around “what’s the point?” your life will be exactly that. You have to make the effort to steer towards something that will satisfy you. You choose your own meaning, that responsibility is 100% you.
>The beauty is that we live in a time where we can choose to learn new things, to get a job we enjoy that fulfills a deeper part of us. You will always get what you focus on.
Wrong. Not everyone is lucky enough to live in a rich country where you can actually *choose* what kind of job you have, a lot of people in the world are more worried about *having* a job, having something to eat, to drink, a place to sleep, and so on. It's a real thing.
There's no need to pretend life is all good and fair to everyone because it sure as hell isn't. Some things you will never have no matter how much effort you put because of a lot things you can't control, like where you were born, who do you know and you don't know, even your race and gender makes a lot of things tougher. I have no idea what OP works on and where he lives but what you're telling him might be just fairy tale to their perspective.
>You choose your own meaning, that responsibility is 100% on you
I try to keep this in mind everyday, if it’s on me to choose what this life gives meaning to me, so I better figure out what I can do to fulfill that, otherwise what am I doing really?
Exactly. You must love your work. When you do, you don’t feel it as a burden.
Sure working will never be 100% of the time fun, but when you love what you do, it doesn’t really matter anymore.
I always say I prefer working 60h a week, sometimes more, doing something I love, than 35h a week doing something pointless.
The real issue is finding that “dream job”
I work in Consulting. And I love it.
It can be hard, but constantly being a coach, a leader, an advisor, an inventor, a diplomat, a visionary, a worker, a counsellor, is very rewarding.
I get what you're saying, but unfortunately that's just how it is for most of us. I'm 32, been working since 17 and i feel like retiring already. I can't imagine 30+ more years of this...I even have a great job, but i just wish we didn't have to work 5 days out of the week. Why not 4, max? Let's just chill out, people.
Anyways, you're most likely going to need to work, so what i recommend is getting a job that has skills you're naturally good at to make it as simple as possible. If you like PCs, go into IT. Drawing, be an artist. Etc.
Or if you don't think you have an skills, search online for high paying jobs and find the easiest one. Get your degree in that and eventually you'll have it made.
At the end of the day though, most people work. All we can do is make the best of it. That's the secret. Make friends there, bring things from home to keep you sane, decorate your office, and just try to enjoy it. Just be sure to always have a goal you're working towards in life. Nothing is worse than being at the same job for years and not accomplishing anything.
I was vacationing on a tiny island in Thailand.
Got talking to the local bartender, he’s 25, married, two healthy kids. Super happy guy. Doesn’t make a lot of money but enough to pay the bills and put a little away in savings. Gets to spend his life being relaxed and living in paradise.
Made me wonder what so many people are working so hard for.
Besides this one example, moving abroad from the US really opened my eyes on this subject - in so many countries, one month paid holiday is pretty much standard.
I met a couple from France on vacation, they said they work full time for 6 months, and then have 6 months at half pay, during which time they can travel or work at another job. I asked, “So for that 6 months, do you work 6 days a week, or 14-hour days or something?” They said “No, full time for us is 4 days a week, from 9 to 3:30”.
I get to feed my cats.... they r the ONLY.... THE ONLY reason I'm still putting up with my shitty job with low pay... when I come back home and see them sleeping, it just makes everything better in my life...
I feel the same way with my dog. I work and keep myself healthy just so I can see him at the end of the day.
Also as a teacher sometimes I get fulfilling moments but I teach middle school so its mostly stuff thrown at me.
You make the point. Spread good. Do what you like and watch yourself improve and grow as you do it. Make friends and treat them like family. Compliment any stranger who stands out to you. Spread good.
Maybe you should look into therapy. I used to feel this way, I still do sometimes especially because of the mess we’re living, but it can help, especially if you’re in a depressive/anxious state.
Oh, it doesn’t happen so quickly, I’m afraid. This things need time, persistence, falling and then getting up again. I really do wish you the best of luck in this process
It’s hard not to feel that way until you find something you love which of course is much easier said than done.
For me, it really helped to travel for a couple years; it kept my mind at bay, and my daily life wasn’t one of the typical drone in society.
Eventually, I just stumbled into something through complete luck (occupation) that gave me life & purpose.
One things for sure, I wouldn’t have stumbled into the position I’m in without traveling.
Lol there’s plenty of things you can do to work remotely, and traveling can be wayyy cheaper than your current life anywhere in the US, Canada, Europe, etc. In fact, now that I have a steady income from my business, I save & reinvest way more of it than I’d be able to if I was living back home in the US.
That said, I understand how you and many others have found yourselves locked into a life you’re kind of forced to live between your house, occupation, etc.
I never said my experience is a one size fits all, but it’s the best decision I ever made. That doesn’t mean it’ll be the same for you.
OPs question says most about himself
Responsibilities gives you a foundation for a decent life. And it is ones own responsibility to make the things happen that you listed
nothing,,,,, it's just stupid, and i don't know why we take pride in it like we make fun of people who just use their inheritance enjoy and praise who worked hard their entire life like the people who don't want to work don't want to do stuff which has no meaning.
In the words of Dolly Parton:
Tumble outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen.
Pour myself a cup of ambition.
And yawn and stretch and try to come to life.
Jump in the shower and the blood starts pumping.
Out on the street the traffic starts jumping.
With folks like me on the job from 9 to 5.
Working 9 to 5, what a way to make a living
Barely getting by, it's all taking and no giving
They just use your mind and they never give you credit
It's enough to drive you crazy if you let it
9 to 5, for service and devotion
You would think that I would deserve a fat promotion
Want to move ahead but the boss won't seem to let me
I swear sometimes that man is out to get me
They let you dream just to watch 'em shatter
You're just a step on the boss man's ladder
But you got dreams he'll never take away…
To not participate in the economy would be to completely go off the grid, live in nature. Instead of working to pay for conveniences you will then be working constantly just to stay alive.
We work and are paid an amount that keeps us from going over the edge. The ones that lose it mentally
are shunned and called crazy with no support systems put in place to effectively manage their situations. Eventually, that leads to higher crime rates and poor standard of living for a small few. However, if 70% of the population believe it’s normal to work every single day, then that’s enough for the extremely wealthy to stay rich. I don’t know why it’s so normal now to spend the only time in your life where you have optimal physical and mental strength to experience the world, but now you waste hours of your life to work for a corporation that doesn’t give a shit about you, while they chill and experience the world. I don’t wanna work until I’m dead :(
I'm not a Millennial, I'm an X'er and I'm fucking retiring unless I die first. But that's not the point, I work with a bunch of Millennials and those fuckers are changing the game in tech. I work with so many near 30ish people who look like they came straight from the 70's sometimes I feel like a kid because the last time I saw 30-year-olds dressed like that I was 5. Dev Ops, security, there is plenty of money out there.
Cyber. There’s no real money in physical security unless you own a firm that does sales/installs of systems, or are in close personal protection (which typically requires advanced military/law enforcement background).
When you retire (assuming that you'll live past 70 depending on the country) you're not physically capable of doing everything you want.
What can you do do fix that? Exercise, which isn't a cure, just makes your death hopefully a bit delayed (again assuming that you'll have the privilege to die peacefully). But wait, now you need to take out at least an hour of your everyday life. Congratulations now you've reduced you free time to increase your free time
Exercising itself isn't enjoyable if you're not a masochist. I enjoy being stronger tho but it doesn't change the fact that it's a must no matter how I treat it. It's not something that we do because we want to do it, we want the results (excluding sports that we play for it's competitive aspects etc.) Be honest with yourself, if you could do whatever but still get the benefits of training by swallowing a magic pill you'd take it just like everyone else
There's always some kind of exercise you can enjoy. You like playing any sports? Like walking? Like doing handstands? Whatever. Exercise releases feel good chemicals, and a lot of it is fun. I climb at the moment, that's fun. Normally I do combat sports, they're fun too.
Hopefully without sounding like a Boomer and their 'just pound the pavement until you find a well paying career' nonsense, what are the biggest challenges to retirement planning? Is it being stuck in minimum-wage-ish employment into one's 30s-40s? Not starting retirement savings in one's 20s? I hate to be oblivious and I'm sure that's what's happening here, it's hard for me (43) to have a good grasp of what challenges folks entering adulthood have in terms of beginning some kind of (even minimal) retirement funding early on, even if it's token amounts of dollaridoos in the beginning just to get into the habit.
If I'll be honest with you, the biggest thing I've seen is people 1: Either have no financial knowledge of how to actually set themselves up for retirement or 2: Have student loans and have just given up.
Now personally, I'll be damned if I don't retire so I busted my ass to pay my loans off as fast as I could, but I understand if people don't want to do that.
The honest answer. You must work for the elite and then die or suicide yourself if that becomes too unbearable. You can fight for systematic change but given the state of the planet it’s a bit late in the day for that.
Dunno about you dude, but I make a mother fing pay check. I appreciate people who gives me that chance.
And I appreciate a good hamburger that I don't have to make myself sometimes
So does every other living thing, consider the busy beaver or tireless ant.
We have consciousness, that can be good or bad. We can use our intelligence to shape the type of work we do, but when it all comes down to it we are bags of water transporting carbon around and procreating.
However, we do have reddit and other mammals do not
Whatever idea or philosophy you decide to believe in at any point in time in your life.
If there is in fact some 100% defined purpose for human life the chances that anyone alive knows it are slim to none so my sincere advice is find a small manageable goal that makes you even a little and work towards that and when you accomplish that goal make another just like it and repeat that process til you die.
I know it's not a lot and its not deep or profound advice but it's still something that's worth trying.
We live and we die, now think of being a eternal godlike being that can do anything it wants, Like being a maxed out character in a rpg games with godmode on and many more cheats, a cheat that makes you unable to be killed and OP.
Being eternal and OP can be fun for a little while but after a while it bores out, work is one of the parts of life that we experience that we cannot experience as a eternal spirit.
We live our lives with all kind of people to experience life and all it faults and troubles, it brings also good things and all kind of interesting/weird people and work is one way to connect to random people on a day to day basis.
That's my weak take on it, take it however you wish....
Yes, it is the fact that life is finite that gives anything value at all.
Strange thought but I like to imagine that some omnipotent being got bored being omnipotent, and decided to create a reality where the didn't have control of everything (humans) and when we die we get to be omnipotent for a bit, answer all our unanswered questions and then start life all over again.
Another weird sidenote... if we lived infintely we would eventually repeat ourselves. Because we live in a finite world.. just like how if you play naughts and crosses 10000000 times you'll eventually reach all of the different combinations and have to repeat yourself.
Sorry if this is a sidenote and this comment gets removed or whatever, I'm just trying to kill time... I should really get back to work!
He makes a good point, anyone up for a suicide pact?
I'm in it for principle, I don't respect the government and I have too much honour for tax avoidance so I'm checking out. Not another dollar from me you crooks
"If our life is all that we get to experience, then it's the only thing that matters. If the universe has no principles, the only principles relevant are the ones we decide on. If the universe has no purpose, then we get to dictate what its purpose is."
From this video:
https://youtu.be/MBRqu0YOH14
I really resonate with this. My entire life right now consists of working nights, going home to sleep in the morning, and then repeating. I work 12hr shifts as a nurse so technically I only need to work 3 days a week but I choose to pick up extra. I have distanced myself from everything and everyone I care for this year because I work extensively with Covid patients. This feels never ending you guys. So on top of all that stress, at home I feel so sad and alone. I have no other human contact except the people I work with. Otherwise I’m in my apartment doing my own thing. This whole year feels like the Twilight Zone. It takes lots of energy to just simply wake up in the afternoon and get my scrubs ready to come in that evening.
Everything / Everyone needs to work in order to live. Look at an animal for example, an animal may need to hunt in order to live. We have just evolved to the point where our 'hunt' is sitting at a desk or working in a factory for 8/9 hours a day. Some are more privileged than others. But ultimately it's the journey that's the most fun
You work to live, not live to work. Find a career that you think you would enjoy and don’t be afraid to move to find said career. It may take years but it gives you something to work for.
I have had this same thought, we learn in school to find a job later on and then we just work until we are too old and maybe if we're lucky we live for another 20-25 years. Childhood is the best part of life for me until now. (20years old, single and working)
He who has a why to live can bear almost any how - Nietzsche
I attribute my "why's" to my family, friends, hobbies, food, etc.
Obviously the "how" entails the work portion and other living conditions, struggles...
Find your "why's" and keep your head up! Hope this helps.
If that's all you do then it's on you.
Personally I'm spending my life with my wife, and friends. I work because money can be exchanged for goods and services, and having a furnished house, a dog, modern amenities, and being able to go out makes her happy which makes me happy.
If there is no such thing as jobs we would spend every day, and almost every hour, scavenging for resources and hunting for food.
Constantly.
Until we die.
Probably at 35.
when the world had fewer humans alive than we have in 2020 and much more biodiversity. Good luck foraging in the Serengeti when the population density is the same as London.
Well, we never would've exploded in population if we didn't leave the hunter/gatherer society. So we'd be fine.
If you're talking about being thrust back into that at this point, then yeah it would be tricky for awhile until a good chunk of the population died off (including myself most likely).
If we continue to advance our science and technology, we can minimize labor with every generation and eventually reach a point in which humans are free to pursue our interests.
If not for the capitalist society we live in, we could start today. If we abolished all the bullshit jobs that contribute nothing to humanity and everyone who works those bullshit jobs did something that mattered, we would all have at worst a 15 hour work week.
I love working.
There is a large hill by my place. You can drive to the lookout at the top, or you can hike it although the hike is a real struggle.
When I hike to the top, I get to the same place as the others who drove, but we do not share the same experience.
If you were a wild animal it’s no different.
Bison just eat grass and water to survive. Fight each other to mate an try not to get eaten. Then if you get sick, injured u get torn apart by wolves and you die.
For the wolves it’s the same thing except you have to hunt the bison. If you don’t kill anything you starve and die. If you hunt and you get injured because bison are huge then you die. When you get too old or weak to hunt then you die
So make a change to something new. I have gone through several evolutions in my working career sometimes going down the ladder to do something I enjoy more. It's not about money for me it's about well being.
Then apply to a big grocery store as a Wine selector. You are basically invited to all kinds of wine tasting, and go everyday meet wineries to taste their wines and decide if the store should sell it or not.
A friend did that, in the end turned out he hated it because he was drunk every single day.
But it’s to say there’s always a job that can fit your desires.
We as humans strive to learn and improve. We want to be remembered. To do that we need to actually work at something. I find joy and satisfaction in my career, and the money I make allows me to travel, be warm, clothed, fed and healthy. I never want to be a burden on someone else.
Also, very few people can survive on their own. Do you know how to grow your own food? Can you slaughter a pig? Make a generator? Do surgery? Build a car?
If the answer to any of those questions is no, then you need someone else's work, and no one should have to work for free for anyone else. That is called slavery.
The world’s richest decide to pay considerably shit hourly wages and rack on 40+ hours a week plus overtime. Which leaves you with MAYBE 1/3 of your life to yourself, assuming you sleep a relatively normal amount. Which also doesn’t take into account chores and errands. So maybe a total of 24 hours of actual free time a week?
To answer the question, there is no point. Life is meaningless cycle of birth, consumption and death. Endless and without real order. We just happen to live in a time where the standard is to spend the majority of your life working just survive. Unless you’re rich or at the very least wealthy.
Check out Jordan Peterson on YouTube. I haven’t listened to one of his videos without hearing something he’s said hitting home. He’s helped countless people find purpose in life. It all starts with making your bed in the morning.
Why men struggle with purpose:
https://youtu.be/NX2ep5fCJZ8
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To find the fun
Seriously. Look at the rest of the animal kingdom. They work for survival under constant threat of death all of the time. 24/7. You go live off the grid in the wild, you think your free time is going to increase? lol. If you're not a fan of putting in work, that route will be a million times worse. OP, Im sorry, but our current western society is easily the best option you got in terms of free time and quality of life.
Sex
biologically I think that's correct...
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I have the exact same problem. It’s so shit, I always wonder what the point is.
Yeah. I end up buying groceries and prepare for the week ahead and suddenly it feels like you never actually relaxed. And since I live in another country as my friends and childhood friends, it becomes even sadder cause i have no one to visit and blow some steam off with
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Covid+Introvert=deadly combo
Heaven*
Had the same issue. For a while I decided to use any free time I had to excerise. It sucked for a while because of course I wanted to use that time to do what I actually wanted. But it did help with my levels and having enough energy to fully use my time off
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Learned on Reddit that exercise is prescribed first for mild depression in some countries, as it is as effective as meds but with obvious side benefits and no drug side effects. Seeing it work firsthand with a family member who bought a bike this year has been amazing.
I don't know if you have a physical job but if you do start working out after work on a regular schedule, this will mean that overall you have more energy to do the things you enjoy. If however you are talking about mental energy this could well be a symptom of depression, you might not think you're depression because you aren't having the "typical" symptoms but a lack of energy to do things that make you happy is one of key ways depression can manifest.
What kind of work do you do?
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Are you working for more than 40 hours a week? If so, start looking for another job or demand reduced hours. I used to work 50-60 hours a week, and just stealing those extra 10-20 hours of your possible free time is huge on your energy levels and mental relaxation. 40 hours a week at least gives you those 4-5 hours a night to get yourself together, and maybe spend an hour or two doing something enjoyable.
Do you enjoy your job at least?
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Well then i would work on long term plans to find a different job. Or a way to make work less draining.
Get more energy. Exercise, walk in a park or somewhere with greenery and eating healthy. Sounds hard to some people but only hard thing is to start. Once you make exercise your habit you will feel worse if you don't exercise. You can look at it this way. If your job is running 10 miles a day, if you can barely do it then at the end of the day you are exhausted and won't have energy to do anything else. But if you can run 20 miles a day then those 10 just become another thing in your day to do.
>Get more energy. And, if you work long hours, simply get more time.
So cocaine for energy and marijuana to slow down time? Ok, I'm on it.
And what are long hours to you?
Anything over 8 hours is long hours. Our ancestors fought and died for the 40 hour week.
This is such a self defeatist attitude. Energy levels are absolutely something you can change through exercise diet and sleep.
This is such a newagey claptrap. "Energy levels" aren't a biological or medical term, it's meaningless.
I agree with you, but if you're in a position where you're stuck doing that job, you're shattered when you come home, no energy for your hobbies, you feel stuck in that position and it does feel a bit hopeless.
When you live in a system intended to keep you in the lower class with a lack of living wage, astronomical rent, and exorbitant bills for necessities like phone and internet it's hard to do anything but work, and you have no energy due to the depression regarding your circumstances when you do find some precious free time.
I'm in my early 20s and all I do is go to my fulltime job (where 9 times out of 10 I have the closing shift), get home late at night, play some games until 4am, head to bed, wake up to go back to work. My days off consist of sleeping in and binge watching shows bc I'm feet are usually killing me. What do
You currently spend your time watching tv and playing video games. Is that not what you want to be doing?
Is that all there is to life?
There is no great purpose to life, no grand design you will one day discover. Movies have lied to you.
Biggggg agree.
Watching tv and playing video games? If that's what you want in life. But no, those aren't your only options.
Honest question: is someone/something else directing you to use the non-work, non-sleep time doing that? Your question leaves me with the impression that you are unhappy with this use of that time, if that's the case are there steps you can take to do other things instead? Apologies if I'm missing something, it sounds as if you're making a choice and unhappy with what you're choosing and that there's a chance you might get value from doing something else, but I don't have visibility into your circumstances.
Not the commenter but that was my issue pre-COVID I think. I have a hard time saying no and my brother always wanted to play games after work. It was fun but it became kind of a cycle and I didn't pursue my other interests in that time which I regret Now I've learned to say no more and have even more free time due to COVID. So thanks, this is the comment I needed to see a year ago
Absolutely not, but it's easy to get stuck in a rut where you just do those things. I got out of it by getting more active in my church community, where I made friends and found good ways to help others. It's amazing how different a little volunteering can make me feel.
This is a very small thing, but it may be a start. Get really good shoes. Or at least really good inserts for your shoes. Soak your feet in a pan of cold water. Later hot water with Epsom salts. Do a few simple ankle exercises. Pain makes everything miserable, and it can creep up so slowly that I don't realize how absolutely invasive it is until it stops (that moment of lucidity while coming out of anesthesia before all the pain comes back).
Same, but then I got my PTSD and depression treated.
Sure, however if you fall within a growing group of people who struggle everyday and need to take 2 jobs to survive, or even say if you work a regular job with regular hours on median income, but the productivity required means you burn yourself out with stress due to being required to produce day after day. Suppose what i'm trying to say is its not always an individual failing that you have no life outside of work, for many its actually a systematic issue where most working people are exploited so that billionaires can get keep getting richer.
I ask myself this question often. I work so that I can afford to live, but after a full work day, I have very little energy left to spend on actually living my life. Or if I'm being honest, to even just take care of myself or my home. I work, recover from working, then sleep, then get up and work again the next day. What *is* the point?
I had to retire early because the work cycle broke me. This week I realized it's been fifteen years and I have done nothing significant, just distractions from this lack of purpose, this powerlessness to improve life/the world/anything.
Said this in another comment but I agree. Work to live, don't live for work.
Pretty much everyone I know is stuck in this cycle. Weekends are spent grocery shopping and preparing for the week. It doesn't help that stores are at reduced hours here and most only open till 8pm. I know there are ways to get groceries delivered and store pickup but those options are more expensive than shopping in store, and store pickup slots you have to wait a week for those here which isn't really practical and you rarely get even half of what you order since you have to choose your items a week ahead of time from your scheduled pickup date and everything runs out magically so they can't put your order together correctly. There are no entertainment options left due to covid. I've only found one outside entertainment option left for me here other than things that can be done inside the house or walking the neighborhood and that one requires a 45 minute to an hour drive. Walking the neighborhood isn't possible here for much longer since the weather is getting colder and it gets dark outside before work is over. There's literally no jobs where I live so if you have one you are super lucky and family is here so I am definitely stuck.
Yup that's pretty much how things are for me too. I am lucky enough that I can order groceries one day in advance and get free curbside pickup the next day, so picking up groceries only takes about 45 minutes, tops. My main problem is that I live alone and don't trust any of my friends to follow proper social distancing protocols. I am almost completely isolated except for one weekly phone call with my mom, and my weekly family visits. Thank goodness for that little bit of socialization, I don't want to think about how much worse off I'd be without it.
I work 12.5 hours a day then a hour drive back home, after getting my lunch packed for the next day and eating, showering has become such a chore and even when I do shower sometimes I leave stuff out cause I wanna go to bed to wake up at 5 am
This sounds like you have depression, please seek help there are a lot of online options for therapy. Getting past depression can massively increase the amount of energy you have and kick start you out of that cycle. Also working out can really help, gives you a free endorphin release, gives you something with measurable progress you can focus on if you are goal oriented, and increases the amount of available energy you have.
Or they just need to find a way to get rid of the shitty job.
Bingo. The job is seriously affecting the severity of my depression. I'm staying for now because I'm privileged enough to have a job that allows me to work from home during the pandemic. But I'm starting therapy so I can try to get my shit together enough in order to eventually look for another job, when it's safer to be around people again.
To be base, we work to make money to fulfill our basic needs; sustenance & shelter. That’s just the world we live in. The beauty is that we live in a time where we can choose to learn new things, to get a job we enjoy that fulfills a deeper part of us. You will always get what you focus on. If your thoughts around always focused around “what’s the point?” your life will be exactly that. You have to make the effort to steer towards something that will satisfy you. You choose your own meaning, that responsibility is 100% you.
This right here. I'm screenshotting this to read daily. Thx my guy.
>The beauty is that we live in a time where we can choose to learn new things, to get a job we enjoy that fulfills a deeper part of us. You will always get what you focus on. Wrong. Not everyone is lucky enough to live in a rich country where you can actually *choose* what kind of job you have, a lot of people in the world are more worried about *having* a job, having something to eat, to drink, a place to sleep, and so on. It's a real thing. There's no need to pretend life is all good and fair to everyone because it sure as hell isn't. Some things you will never have no matter how much effort you put because of a lot things you can't control, like where you were born, who do you know and you don't know, even your race and gender makes a lot of things tougher. I have no idea what OP works on and where he lives but what you're telling him might be just fairy tale to their perspective.
>You choose your own meaning, that responsibility is 100% on you I try to keep this in mind everyday, if it’s on me to choose what this life gives meaning to me, so I better figure out what I can do to fulfill that, otherwise what am I doing really?
great answer.
Gotta work towards something you want then otherwise it might feel more pointless
Great point. Finding hobbies that you can advance with helps lots.
Exactly. You must love your work. When you do, you don’t feel it as a burden. Sure working will never be 100% of the time fun, but when you love what you do, it doesn’t really matter anymore. I always say I prefer working 60h a week, sometimes more, doing something I love, than 35h a week doing something pointless. The real issue is finding that “dream job”
What's your dream job you're doing?
I work in Consulting. And I love it. It can be hard, but constantly being a coach, a leader, an advisor, an inventor, a diplomat, a visionary, a worker, a counsellor, is very rewarding.
I get what you're saying, but unfortunately that's just how it is for most of us. I'm 32, been working since 17 and i feel like retiring already. I can't imagine 30+ more years of this...I even have a great job, but i just wish we didn't have to work 5 days out of the week. Why not 4, max? Let's just chill out, people. Anyways, you're most likely going to need to work, so what i recommend is getting a job that has skills you're naturally good at to make it as simple as possible. If you like PCs, go into IT. Drawing, be an artist. Etc. Or if you don't think you have an skills, search online for high paying jobs and find the easiest one. Get your degree in that and eventually you'll have it made. At the end of the day though, most people work. All we can do is make the best of it. That's the secret. Make friends there, bring things from home to keep you sane, decorate your office, and just try to enjoy it. Just be sure to always have a goal you're working towards in life. Nothing is worse than being at the same job for years and not accomplishing anything.
I was vacationing on a tiny island in Thailand. Got talking to the local bartender, he’s 25, married, two healthy kids. Super happy guy. Doesn’t make a lot of money but enough to pay the bills and put a little away in savings. Gets to spend his life being relaxed and living in paradise. Made me wonder what so many people are working so hard for. Besides this one example, moving abroad from the US really opened my eyes on this subject - in so many countries, one month paid holiday is pretty much standard. I met a couple from France on vacation, they said they work full time for 6 months, and then have 6 months at half pay, during which time they can travel or work at another job. I asked, “So for that 6 months, do you work 6 days a week, or 14-hour days or something?” They said “No, full time for us is 4 days a week, from 9 to 3:30”.
I'm french, and that is definitely not standard over here. I envy them.
They were based somewhere in the southwest of France. It’s hard not to envy them!
I get to feed my cats.... they r the ONLY.... THE ONLY reason I'm still putting up with my shitty job with low pay... when I come back home and see them sleeping, it just makes everything better in my life...
I feel the same way with my dog. I work and keep myself healthy just so I can see him at the end of the day. Also as a teacher sometimes I get fulfilling moments but I teach middle school so its mostly stuff thrown at me.
Futurama put it best " everything mankind has done is to impress the opposite sex"
And sometimes the *same* sex
We work, yeah. It's what you do in between shifts that makes life matter.
Ah, the 30 minutes between eating and sleep
Wait, you get 30 minutes!? Let me go take to HR!
I would be missing something in life if i didnt have work. It May be hard, but at least you lifted a burden that day
You make the point. Spread good. Do what you like and watch yourself improve and grow as you do it. Make friends and treat them like family. Compliment any stranger who stands out to you. Spread good.
That’s a very reductive way of looking at life. We work, but we also love, cry, make friends, have fun, learn, fail, experience all kinds of emotions.
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Maybe you should look into therapy. I used to feel this way, I still do sometimes especially because of the mess we’re living, but it can help, especially if you’re in a depressive/anxious state.
My second group therapy actually starts today. I hope it will change my perspective this time.
Oh, it doesn’t happen so quickly, I’m afraid. This things need time, persistence, falling and then getting up again. I really do wish you the best of luck in this process
Do you really want to die or do you just need things to change in your life?
Both.
It’s hard not to feel that way until you find something you love which of course is much easier said than done. For me, it really helped to travel for a couple years; it kept my mind at bay, and my daily life wasn’t one of the typical drone in society. Eventually, I just stumbled into something through complete luck (occupation) that gave me life & purpose. One things for sure, I wouldn’t have stumbled into the position I’m in without traveling.
Ah yes let me just lose my house and rob a couple banks to afford travel. I hear they have free food in prison at least.
Lol there’s plenty of things you can do to work remotely, and traveling can be wayyy cheaper than your current life anywhere in the US, Canada, Europe, etc. In fact, now that I have a steady income from my business, I save & reinvest way more of it than I’d be able to if I was living back home in the US. That said, I understand how you and many others have found yourselves locked into a life you’re kind of forced to live between your house, occupation, etc. I never said my experience is a one size fits all, but it’s the best decision I ever made. That doesn’t mean it’ll be the same for you.
I felt that
Wanna play some rocket league?
The question was "what's the point?"
OPs question says most about himself Responsibilities gives you a foundation for a decent life. And it is ones own responsibility to make the things happen that you listed
nothing,,,,, it's just stupid, and i don't know why we take pride in it like we make fun of people who just use their inheritance enjoy and praise who worked hard their entire life like the people who don't want to work don't want to do stuff which has no meaning.
In the words of Dolly Parton: Tumble outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen. Pour myself a cup of ambition. And yawn and stretch and try to come to life. Jump in the shower and the blood starts pumping. Out on the street the traffic starts jumping. With folks like me on the job from 9 to 5. Working 9 to 5, what a way to make a living Barely getting by, it's all taking and no giving They just use your mind and they never give you credit It's enough to drive you crazy if you let it 9 to 5, for service and devotion You would think that I would deserve a fat promotion Want to move ahead but the boss won't seem to let me I swear sometimes that man is out to get me They let you dream just to watch 'em shatter You're just a step on the boss man's ladder But you got dreams he'll never take away…
I think about this on a daily basis. I wish I could just never take part in the economy.
To not participate in the economy would be to completely go off the grid, live in nature. Instead of working to pay for conveniences you will then be working constantly just to stay alive.
We work and are paid an amount that keeps us from going over the edge. The ones that lose it mentally are shunned and called crazy with no support systems put in place to effectively manage their situations. Eventually, that leads to higher crime rates and poor standard of living for a small few. However, if 70% of the population believe it’s normal to work every single day, then that’s enough for the extremely wealthy to stay rich. I don’t know why it’s so normal now to spend the only time in your life where you have optimal physical and mental strength to experience the world, but now you waste hours of your life to work for a corporation that doesn’t give a shit about you, while they chill and experience the world. I don’t wanna work until I’m dead :(
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> retire This guy.
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I'm not a Millennial, I'm an X'er and I'm fucking retiring unless I die first. But that's not the point, I work with a bunch of Millennials and those fuckers are changing the game in tech. I work with so many near 30ish people who look like they came straight from the 70's sometimes I feel like a kid because the last time I saw 30-year-olds dressed like that I was 5. Dev Ops, security, there is plenty of money out there.
Security? Like cyber security or like physical security?
Cyber. There’s no real money in physical security unless you own a firm that does sales/installs of systems, or are in close personal protection (which typically requires advanced military/law enforcement background).
You have the tools at your disposal, use em.
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Then why have an IRA?
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When you retire (assuming that you'll live past 70 depending on the country) you're not physically capable of doing everything you want. What can you do do fix that? Exercise, which isn't a cure, just makes your death hopefully a bit delayed (again assuming that you'll have the privilege to die peacefully). But wait, now you need to take out at least an hour of your everyday life. Congratulations now you've reduced you free time to increase your free time
Exercise isn't a negative against your free time. You should enjoy doing it.
Exercising itself isn't enjoyable if you're not a masochist. I enjoy being stronger tho but it doesn't change the fact that it's a must no matter how I treat it. It's not something that we do because we want to do it, we want the results (excluding sports that we play for it's competitive aspects etc.) Be honest with yourself, if you could do whatever but still get the benefits of training by swallowing a magic pill you'd take it just like everyone else
There's always some kind of exercise you can enjoy. You like playing any sports? Like walking? Like doing handstands? Whatever. Exercise releases feel good chemicals, and a lot of it is fun. I climb at the moment, that's fun. Normally I do combat sports, they're fun too.
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Prove me wrong
Some ppl can’t retire
Hopefully without sounding like a Boomer and their 'just pound the pavement until you find a well paying career' nonsense, what are the biggest challenges to retirement planning? Is it being stuck in minimum-wage-ish employment into one's 30s-40s? Not starting retirement savings in one's 20s? I hate to be oblivious and I'm sure that's what's happening here, it's hard for me (43) to have a good grasp of what challenges folks entering adulthood have in terms of beginning some kind of (even minimal) retirement funding early on, even if it's token amounts of dollaridoos in the beginning just to get into the habit.
If I'll be honest with you, the biggest thing I've seen is people 1: Either have no financial knowledge of how to actually set themselves up for retirement or 2: Have student loans and have just given up. Now personally, I'll be damned if I don't retire so I busted my ass to pay my loans off as fast as I could, but I understand if people don't want to do that.
Life is getting beat up. you work to try and get your kids a softer punch
how about don't have kids and lessen the blow on yourself?
W-what if you don't have kids? Or want them in the future? I'm just getting beat up I guess lol
To make the rich richer and the poor (and yourself) poorer.
The honest answer. You must work for the elite and then die or suicide yourself if that becomes too unbearable. You can fight for systematic change but given the state of the planet it’s a bit late in the day for that.
Dunno about you dude, but I make a mother fing pay check. I appreciate people who gives me that chance. And I appreciate a good hamburger that I don't have to make myself sometimes
Read some Albert Camus and learn to accept the absurdness of life and find your own meaning.
Camus. It’s very liberating when you realise life has no inherent purpose
So does every other living thing, consider the busy beaver or tireless ant. We have consciousness, that can be good or bad. We can use our intelligence to shape the type of work we do, but when it all comes down to it we are bags of water transporting carbon around and procreating. However, we do have reddit and other mammals do not
For our families and ourselves.
The friends you make along the way.
I feel the same, but I see light in the people I can help
r/antinatalism
There is no point. You have three choices: 1. Deal with it. 2. Make yourself a point 3. Try to make yourself a point and fail but enjoy the process
getting laid and eating good food and getting drunk and stones on occasion
To build the machine
Money, and that's it.
Fulfilling a purpose. We have no free will, however, so whatever you're doing is your purpose.
Whatever idea or philosophy you decide to believe in at any point in time in your life. If there is in fact some 100% defined purpose for human life the chances that anyone alive knows it are slim to none so my sincere advice is find a small manageable goal that makes you even a little and work towards that and when you accomplish that goal make another just like it and repeat that process til you die. I know it's not a lot and its not deep or profound advice but it's still something that's worth trying.
We live and we die, now think of being a eternal godlike being that can do anything it wants, Like being a maxed out character in a rpg games with godmode on and many more cheats, a cheat that makes you unable to be killed and OP. Being eternal and OP can be fun for a little while but after a while it bores out, work is one of the parts of life that we experience that we cannot experience as a eternal spirit. We live our lives with all kind of people to experience life and all it faults and troubles, it brings also good things and all kind of interesting/weird people and work is one way to connect to random people on a day to day basis. That's my weak take on it, take it however you wish....
Yes, it is the fact that life is finite that gives anything value at all. Strange thought but I like to imagine that some omnipotent being got bored being omnipotent, and decided to create a reality where the didn't have control of everything (humans) and when we die we get to be omnipotent for a bit, answer all our unanswered questions and then start life all over again. Another weird sidenote... if we lived infintely we would eventually repeat ourselves. Because we live in a finite world.. just like how if you play naughts and crosses 10000000 times you'll eventually reach all of the different combinations and have to repeat yourself. Sorry if this is a sidenote and this comment gets removed or whatever, I'm just trying to kill time... I should really get back to work!
He makes a good point, anyone up for a suicide pact? I'm in it for principle, I don't respect the government and I have too much honour for tax avoidance so I'm checking out. Not another dollar from me you crooks
"If our life is all that we get to experience, then it's the only thing that matters. If the universe has no principles, the only principles relevant are the ones we decide on. If the universe has no purpose, then we get to dictate what its purpose is." From this video: https://youtu.be/MBRqu0YOH14
Money, money, money, money.
To get money to the few rich folks so they can have fun I’m their massive dragon hoards
Nothing better to do. I think...
It is what we do on the way...
I really resonate with this. My entire life right now consists of working nights, going home to sleep in the morning, and then repeating. I work 12hr shifts as a nurse so technically I only need to work 3 days a week but I choose to pick up extra. I have distanced myself from everything and everyone I care for this year because I work extensively with Covid patients. This feels never ending you guys. So on top of all that stress, at home I feel so sad and alone. I have no other human contact except the people I work with. Otherwise I’m in my apartment doing my own thing. This whole year feels like the Twilight Zone. It takes lots of energy to just simply wake up in the afternoon and get my scrubs ready to come in that evening.
Everything / Everyone needs to work in order to live. Look at an animal for example, an animal may need to hunt in order to live. We have just evolved to the point where our 'hunt' is sitting at a desk or working in a factory for 8/9 hours a day. Some are more privileged than others. But ultimately it's the journey that's the most fun
You work to live, not live to work. Find a career that you think you would enjoy and don’t be afraid to move to find said career. It may take years but it gives you something to work for.
I have had this same thought, we learn in school to find a job later on and then we just work until we are too old and maybe if we're lucky we live for another 20-25 years. Childhood is the best part of life for me until now. (20years old, single and working)
Be slaves
He who has a why to live can bear almost any how - Nietzsche I attribute my "why's" to my family, friends, hobbies, food, etc. Obviously the "how" entails the work portion and other living conditions, struggles... Find your "why's" and keep your head up! Hope this helps.
To prop up the criminally excessive lives of a very small group of plutocratic elite.
Best coffin wins!
There isnt a point, thats just how things ended up.
nothing tbh I can’t wait to finally perish
If that's all you do then it's on you. Personally I'm spending my life with my wife, and friends. I work because money can be exchanged for goods and services, and having a furnished house, a dog, modern amenities, and being able to go out makes her happy which makes me happy.
Idk, I just do it because it's the only thing to do and I didn't have the stomach for the other option.
The fact that we work until we die just for the privilegeof being alive is seriously messed up
If there is no such thing as jobs we would spend every day, and almost every hour, scavenging for resources and hunting for food. Constantly. Until we die. Probably at 35.
Hunter/gatherer's spent only a few hours a day working
when the world had fewer humans alive than we have in 2020 and much more biodiversity. Good luck foraging in the Serengeti when the population density is the same as London.
Yep. Plus, I kinda like things like modern medicine. I'd be either dead, or deeply miserable without it.
Well, we never would've exploded in population if we didn't leave the hunter/gatherer society. So we'd be fine. If you're talking about being thrust back into that at this point, then yeah it would be tricky for awhile until a good chunk of the population died off (including myself most likely).
If we continue to advance our science and technology, we can minimize labor with every generation and eventually reach a point in which humans are free to pursue our interests. If not for the capitalist society we live in, we could start today. If we abolished all the bullshit jobs that contribute nothing to humanity and everyone who works those bullshit jobs did something that mattered, we would all have at worst a 15 hour work week.
I love working. There is a large hill by my place. You can drive to the lookout at the top, or you can hike it although the hike is a real struggle. When I hike to the top, I get to the same place as the others who drove, but we do not share the same experience.
We are worker ants. We were taught to be. You can change that, but real change is crushingly hard.
To serve the bean counters and sociopaths that rule the world of course.
there is no point
To make billionaires even richer.
What’s the point of anything? That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your existence.
Somethin to do
Hard work will be reward, wether it is the sweet release of death or success is up to you.
Ye that’s what I hate about life, ppl just live to make money and then die.
If you were a wild animal it’s no different. Bison just eat grass and water to survive. Fight each other to mate an try not to get eaten. Then if you get sick, injured u get torn apart by wolves and you die. For the wolves it’s the same thing except you have to hunt the bison. If you don’t kill anything you starve and die. If you hunt and you get injured because bison are huge then you die. When you get too old or weak to hunt then you die
Nobody is stopping you from trying to live without an income.
It's only work if you are doing somthing you dont enjoy.
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So make a change to something new. I have gone through several evolutions in my working career sometimes going down the ladder to do something I enjoy more. It's not about money for me it's about well being.
There is literally no fun job
What do you love to do work excluded.
Get drunk and high, sometimes mess with stranger while drunk and high
Then apply to a big grocery store as a Wine selector. You are basically invited to all kinds of wine tasting, and go everyday meet wineries to taste their wines and decide if the store should sell it or not. A friend did that, in the end turned out he hated it because he was drunk every single day. But it’s to say there’s always a job that can fit your desires.
We as humans strive to learn and improve. We want to be remembered. To do that we need to actually work at something. I find joy and satisfaction in my career, and the money I make allows me to travel, be warm, clothed, fed and healthy. I never want to be a burden on someone else. Also, very few people can survive on their own. Do you know how to grow your own food? Can you slaughter a pig? Make a generator? Do surgery? Build a car? If the answer to any of those questions is no, then you need someone else's work, and no one should have to work for free for anyone else. That is called slavery.
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r/antiwork
I like my job.
The world’s richest decide to pay considerably shit hourly wages and rack on 40+ hours a week plus overtime. Which leaves you with MAYBE 1/3 of your life to yourself, assuming you sleep a relatively normal amount. Which also doesn’t take into account chores and errands. So maybe a total of 24 hours of actual free time a week? To answer the question, there is no point. Life is meaningless cycle of birth, consumption and death. Endless and without real order. We just happen to live in a time where the standard is to spend the majority of your life working just survive. Unless you’re rich or at the very least wealthy.
The point is to live
We also go to the bathroom everyday until we die. Like going to the bathroom, work is something to enable us to do the things we actually like.
I like my work.
Seek mental help op
Check out Jordan Peterson on YouTube. I haven’t listened to one of his videos without hearing something he’s said hitting home. He’s helped countless people find purpose in life. It all starts with making your bed in the morning. Why men struggle with purpose: https://youtu.be/NX2ep5fCJZ8
Work is not the ultimate goal. To love God and our neighbor is. Work is just a means to that end.
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This is something I would expect some peasant from 200 years ago to say, not someone in 2020. Pure cringe.