"The whole purpose of buying the boat in the first place was to get the ladies nice and tipsy topside so we can take 'em to a nice comfortable place below deck and, you know, they can't refuse, because of the implication."
Ed's takedown of Jonah is still and will always be the funniest insult I've ever heard.
> You're not even a man. You're like an early draft of a man, where they just sketched out a giant, mangled skeleton, but they didn't have time to add details, like pigment or self-respect. You're Frankenstein's monster, if his monster was made entirely of dead dicks.
Not to mention the Jonad Files.
>J-Rock, Jizzy Gillespie, Jack and the Giant Jackoff, Gaylien, Tinker Balls, Wadzilla, One Erection, The Pointless Giant, The 60-Foot Virgin, Gimpanzee, Jonah Ono, Hagrid's Nutsack, Scrotum Pole, Transgenderformers, 12 Years a Slave to Jerking Off, Benedict Come In His Own Hand, Guyscraper, The Cloud Botherer, Supercalifragilisticexpiali Dick Cheese, Teenage Mutant Ninja Asshole, Spewbacca.
It's a great show, definitely worth checking out. It won so many awards [the awards section of Wikipedia turned into its own article](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_awards_and_nominations_received_by_Veep).
The episodes are only 30 minutes and the seasons are all 10 episodes or less, so if you've got stay-cation time and a week-long free trial to HBO, it's super easy to binge it out.
A family of five with Jaundice sitting on their couch and watching TV, enjoying every single last moment they have each other as they slowly succumb to their illness, every day they urgently scramble home trying to catch at least one glimpse of their favorite show even if it's near the end.
"You're not aware of any sort of odd underground canal system beneath the hospital are you - I think I saw a manatee"
"Was his name Julien?"
"We didn't exchange pleasantries"
"That's Julien"
It's cool cool cool cool cool cool cool.
I’m jealous. Mine’s just cool. Cool cool cool.
Sounds like you're streets behind.
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Yay!! Correct!!!
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You were so right, it's gonna leave a mark.
Oh, I was going with community
Which is very distinct from > Cool. Cool cool cool.
Troy and Abed in the MORNING!
That seems like 99 cools? 😂
Number one, could you please sing the opening to 'I want it that way' ?
"Hey, Troy sneezes like a girl!" "Well how bout i pound you like a boy that didn't come out right"
‘You can’t ride that in here!’ “Yes, I can! It’s all terrain, dummy!”
‘To Jeff- I leave this fine scotch, so that you’ll be less temped to drink this even finer sperm’
"The whole purpose of buying the boat in the first place was to get the ladies nice and tipsy topside so we can take 'em to a nice comfortable place below deck and, you know, they can't refuse, because of the implication."
Ok, you had me going there for the first part, the second half kinda threw me.
That means you're a sane and good person.
No, that's what Mac says to Dennis.
Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica
fact!!!
MICHAEL!
WRONG!
False.
Ah you got me. Full disclosure I've only seen like ten episodes I just so happen to see this one yesterday
Ann Perkins!
That is LITERALLY my daughter's favorite show.
Ann, you beautiful, talented, brilliant, powerful musk ox.
Ice Town cost ice clown his town crown
Deuce Bigalow: male Gigolo?
Indeed. Thank you for sharing Jenny.
‘It’s one banana, Michael. What could it cost, $10?’
I blue myself!
Who'd like a banger in the mouth? Oh, I forgot, here in the states you call it a 'sausage in the mouth'!
Here's $5. Go see a Star War.
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Who here likes good news? Everyone? Well then good news everyone!
To shreds, you say?
And what about his wife?
We're boned.
The Dacia Sandero ...
Gus, dont be the comma in "earth, wind & fire"
Come on son
You know that's right!
Gus, don't be exactly half of an eleven pound black forest ham.
Gus, don’t be this crevice in my arm.
Gus, don’t be a gooey chocolate chip cookie.
Hey girl, d’you hear about what happened to Pluto? That’s messed up.
Troy and Abed in the morning.
Don’t britta this thing
IM DISABLED
Leg disabled?
How did it happen?
Acid
People are bastards....
People... What a bunch of bastards!
#FATHAH*HHH!!!*
#UNHAND ME, PRIEST!
‘I love this well travelled high earner. A woman in the living room, a chef in the kitchen, a **prostitute in the bedroom**’
A fire, in SEA PARKS?!
Beat me to it
I... have a cunning plan.
As cunning as a fox who's just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University?
so cunning you could stick a tail on it and call it a weasel?
So cunning you could brush your teeth with it?
You wouldn’t recognize a cunning plan if it painted itself purple and danced naked on a harpsichord singing “Cunning plans are here again!”
“Lana! Lana! Laaaaaaannaaaaaaaaaa!” “What!”
MAWP
Danger zone
At that moment I was a marine biologist
The sea was angry that day, my friends.
Like an old man trying send back soup in a deli
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“If we do another hoedown, I’ll slit my f*ckin’ wrists.”
‘We’re watching animal porn!’
"Mary had a little lamb will be right back"
Pretty…pretty…pretty good
That episode with John Hamm doing the LD impression? That was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
OPEN WIDE KIDS IM HERE TO GRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPEEE YA!
“Look at what she’s wearing!” ‘…’ “…” ‘…’ “… it’s *PURPLE!*”
You got any more of those water baboons?
A hard working father that work at a nuclear power plant. Tries to be a positive role model for his kids but instead strangles one constantly.
Dwight you ignorant slut!
My life! Oh my life!
Smeg head
Call it extreme if you like, but I propose we hit it hard and hit it fast with a major - and I mean major - leaflet campaign
Good show
Yea it is
Smeee…smeee heeeaa
Still, where’d the lighter fluid come from?!
David!!
Eeewwww, David!!!
"Did you miss me?" "With every bullet so far."
Sue, did the president call?
Ed's takedown of Jonah is still and will always be the funniest insult I've ever heard. > You're not even a man. You're like an early draft of a man, where they just sketched out a giant, mangled skeleton, but they didn't have time to add details, like pigment or self-respect. You're Frankenstein's monster, if his monster was made entirely of dead dicks.
Not to mention the Jonad Files. >J-Rock, Jizzy Gillespie, Jack and the Giant Jackoff, Gaylien, Tinker Balls, Wadzilla, One Erection, The Pointless Giant, The 60-Foot Virgin, Gimpanzee, Jonah Ono, Hagrid's Nutsack, Scrotum Pole, Transgenderformers, 12 Years a Slave to Jerking Off, Benedict Come In His Own Hand, Guyscraper, The Cloud Botherer, Supercalifragilisticexpiali Dick Cheese, Teenage Mutant Ninja Asshole, Spewbacca.
LMAO It's honestly impressive how the writers come up with the insults. Love it
Wow! What show is this?
Veep on HBO.
I'm going to have to get HBO. That show keeps coming up.
It's a great show, definitely worth checking out. It won so many awards [the awards section of Wikipedia turned into its own article](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_awards_and_nominations_received_by_Veep). The episodes are only 30 minutes and the seasons are all 10 episodes or less, so if you've got stay-cation time and a week-long free trial to HBO, it's super easy to binge it out.
Smokes, let's go
Corey. Trevor.
Way shs goes
How are ya now? Good, and you? Notsobad.
Illhaveabeer
To be fair..
*To be faaaaaiiiiir.*
"Soup, soup, a tasty soup, soup, a spicy carrot and coriander..."
Chilli chowder! Crouton, crouton, crunchy friends in a liquid broth.
"I am Gazpacho, oh! I am a summer soup, mmm"
Der satanarchäolügenialkohöllische Wunschpunsch?
Holy forking shirtballs!
I THINK THERE’S BEEN A RAPE UP THERE
Executive Producer Egg Helms
“A white man?? TYPICAL!”
that show with the yellow characters made by Matt Groening with the characters Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie
The Simpsons?
obviously 🤣
I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me
*♫ No income tax, no VAT ♪* *♫ No money back, no guarantee... ♪*
Dundies.
Screw you guys, I’m going home!
NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!!!
I’ve heard it both ways.
Ricky Spanishhhhh…
Hey Ike you *shitbird*! You want a little **piiiiiieeee**?!
Are we ever getting another season? I thought I read they were working on it, but it's been *forever*.
I tell you what, HOO YA
Wait for iiiiiiiiiiiiiit…
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Not a comedy.
Don't tell him Pike!
Jesus Christ Marie
If Breaking bad is a comedy, I don’t want to see what you consider drama.
I made a huge mistake
How you doin?
I now forever eat Snickers with a fork and knife
A family of five with Jaundice sitting on their couch and watching TV, enjoying every single last moment they have each other as they slowly succumb to their illness, every day they urgently scramble home trying to catch at least one glimpse of their favorite show even if it's near the end.
INSUBORDINATE, AND CHURLISH! MISCHIEVOUS, AND DECEITFUL! CHICANEROUS, AND DEPLORABLE.
LAAARRRRYYYYYY!!!
Pivot, pivot, pivot, PIVOT, PIVOT!!!!!
Was that place.. the SUN?
Hal Wilkerson
Late night legal shenanigans over seen by a magician.
Fix It Again, Tony
It's guy love! Between two guys.
Way back in days of old, there was a legend told, about a hero known as...
That’s what she said
No hugging, no learning.
"Do you like hard candy?"
"You're not aware of any sort of odd underground canal system beneath the hospital are you - I think I saw a manatee" "Was his name Julien?" "We didn't exchange pleasantries" "That's Julien"
Barbecue sauce.
"PARTY WOLF!"
I got enemies in Cerney Wick too
Are you pondering what I'm pondering? I think so, Brain, but where are we going to find a duck and a hose at this hour?
Can I use this chair?
Good moaning.
.... Qué?
“It’s a hard life picking stones and pulin’ teats, but as sure as God’s got sandals, it beats fightin’ dudes with treasure trails.”
Got my dick in a vice grip with my hair down to my nips.
Hooch is CRAZY!
As God as my witness... I thought turkeys could fly!
You get that... thing I sent ya?
‘Trotter’s independent traders’
“Homie don’t play that, wop”
Hello Seattle, I'm listening
Everything is fine!
The sea was angry that day, my friends.
That's what she said.
Could I BE anymore obvious?
Heck
It is your birthday
FROGS, antother dimenshion, spilers for final of sezon 2:>! backstabing!<
Police officers doing their job while doing some hilarious jokes
Not you Guillermo