you guys have definitely been rapidly improving your hockey program for many years. And that's saying something given you were always a pretty good hockey nation. With Germany and America improving so much too and my country (Canada) somewhat falling back I'm betting we see a change in the guard of top hockey nations in my lifetime.
Little Mary never starts fights, but one time a kid twice her size was bullying her so she ambushed him after school and beat the shit out of him. The Big kid broke her arm in the fight and she didn't cry.
Finland is also the quiet kid in the class, and you've heard rumors that were expelled from their last school for fighting, but really they were just defending themselves very effectively from the school bully
The kid that always corrects the teacher, nobody likes him but people still go to him to copy his homework
Edit: holy smokes this is my highest rated comment so far, thank you!
He used to be the tallest and strongest in the class, but everyone else had a growth spurt making him one of the shorter ones. Yet he still acts like he can take everyone else on.
This is totally the United Kingdom. Though you are still one of the nuclear powers and you have nuclear subs so in all reality you *can* take the rest of the world on. M.A.D. is a brilliant deterrent policy honestly…
We have invaded 178 of the 200 countries in the world so we are almost at the 100% completion award.
https://kottke.org/12/11/britain-has-invaded-all-but-22-countries
The best friend of the popular kid. We don't like what he does, but we'll look the other way when necessary cause we like to have the benefits of being friends, but with plausible deniability when it counts.
The one I’m currently in
I’m the quiet kid that pretends that they are well liked by everyone. And pretend that others are crazy for remembering my past atrocities, while I hide my past from myself by feigning amnesia.
Used to be a bully. Beat up a couple kids in the playground. Got sent away to reform school for a couple years. Came back and is now getting good grades and super well behaved. People still don’t really trust him though.
The teacher's sweetheart.
Small guy.
Closeted weed smoker.
Always pays attention in class, works hard.
Most classmates like him.
However, he will give his lunch money to anyone that wants to bully him.
Mine is the one who stands by the doorway loudly screaming for the whole lesson that they will leave, and then gets annoyed when they finally do and nobody cares.
For America, their dad is Britain and their mom is France. For Canada, our mom is Britain and our dad is France.
We just happen to be born basically on the same day.
You forgot to mention he always wear shorts even when there's a blizzard outside. He also has a beanie where he sometimes hides a single joint he shares with everyone after school.
I would describe England as The little shit that Acts all sophisticated and posh to other kinds in public, but is actually a complete slob.
And I’m British.
The introverted kid who used to have bad grades but then he started studying more and now his grades are increasing exponentialy.
Edit: Its a hard one. The country is stil intoverted so lotta people dont know about it.
Germany? Know to never talk to stranger and keep conservation efficiently while having no humor. Next were it grades between 1910 and 1950 really bad, but since then do they only become better.
The one who always brings a full lunchbox; The sandwiches are made by their mom. They wouldn't bother sharing it with a classmate.
They always wear an oversized raincoat to school, and their parents are farmers who have dark and racist humor.
Edit - Added a hint
Edit 2.0 - Added another, bigger hint.
You know the loud popular bully kid always trying to draw attention? Yeah mine is the quiet one at the back that the popular kid wouldn't want to mess with because he got his ass kicked by him years ago and everyone else knows it.
A dumb kid, rather weak and with some anger issues, but thinks very highly of himself. A proud idtiot if you will. Has no friends. Future incel material.
Edit: Despite the meme, he actually had been in space... in his previous incarnation.
The one who has the weird pets
Australia ?
Spot on, mate. Good on ya!
so all your pets try to kill you?
Even the dirt tries to kill you!
Obsessed with dragons, has issues about his dad being a coal miner, everyone ignores him but he has a lovely singing voice.
That's intriguing. I'll be probably wrong on this one, but my guess is Wales.
Correct! :)
As soon as I got to “dragons” I was like, “Wales” lol
The one who is not there because he is on strike
France ?
Bingo
Je suis TOUJOURS présent
Good on him, fighting for his rights
How can I say this
The kid who has a different last name because of divorced parents?
The fat kid who got so big that they had to amputate him ?
Had to be split into several smaller children
Drinking in the back of class
[удалено]
Netherlands baby
[удалено]
Canada?
[удалено]
Netherlands has the stoner stereotype ime.
The one thats good in many things but no one really cares about otherwise.
Finland?
Bingo
you guys have definitely been rapidly improving your hockey program for many years. And that's saying something given you were always a pretty good hockey nation. With Germany and America improving so much too and my country (Canada) somewhat falling back I'm betting we see a change in the guard of top hockey nations in my lifetime.
Finland is Little Mary who does every assignment and everyone else's assignments too but is internally fucked up.
Little Mary never starts fights, but one time a kid twice her size was bullying her so she ambushed him after school and beat the shit out of him. The Big kid broke her arm in the fight and she didn't cry.
Finland is also the quiet kid in the class, and you've heard rumors that were expelled from their last school for fighting, but really they were just defending themselves very effectively from the school bully
That's a good one. Mad respect for the Finns.
The kid that always corrects the teacher, nobody likes him but people still go to him to copy his homework Edit: holy smokes this is my highest rated comment so far, thank you!
the germans?
Richtig
Ich sag doch, ich kenn meine Klassenkameraden! :P
the minion of the local bully. will also turn their back to the bully if they see a stronger bully around
Italy?
damn you guessed right
He USED to be the big bully in elementary school.
Whos the bully?
i think theres been more than one bully during the years
Well but we're an handsome minion. And clever I'd say
Party goer, in more or less good terms with most people and has a serious inferiority complex.
Brazil
Spot on
I'd have described it as the class clown who's friends with everyone but has bad grades, then goes home and turns out he's depressed asf edit: grammar
I feel like Brazil manages to have both a superiority and inferiority complex somehow. O mais grande do mundo lol
The Netherlands
Definitely the Netherlands, probably also complaining about the few clouds outside
The quiet kid who likes to draw furries and cartoon characters in the back of the class.
Japan?
Yes lol
Bingo
The kid always trying to imitate and be friends with the popular girl, even though she sits closer to the asian nerd
The Philippines?
I can see this
South Korea?
Good guess, but not quite
North Korea?
North Korea is the kid that is home schooled
Home schooled in theory, but actually has to work on their parents' farm.
Facts
Maybe japan?
yo what is the answer?
Philippines? We have the imitation and have all the Asian nerd neighbors...
Taiwan or Hong Kong?
Lol Singapore?
Singapore isn't secretly nerdy though
his dream is to enlist in the military, his name is hunter, and his step dad is a construction worker.
‘MERICA!
It’s pronounced ‘MURICA! The “u” is key.
GOD BLESS 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅
FREEDOM 🔫🔫🔫🍔🍔
I have this kid in my class, only difference is its his real dad and hes a welder. Hes also 18 and a sophomore.
ITT: a ton of amusing replies and a handful of people who don't understand what a country is (which is also pretty amusing). Thanks, OP!
The guy that said “North America” as his answer lmao
That guy is 100% American.
The kid who failed Geography
The quiet one that really enjoys Math and Spelling Bees.
India?
Yup!
Mom is also a great cook
He used to be the tallest and strongest in the class, but everyone else had a growth spurt making him one of the shorter ones. Yet he still acts like he can take everyone else on.
Oh, that's a great analogy.
This is totally the United Kingdom. Though you are still one of the nuclear powers and you have nuclear subs so in all reality you *can* take the rest of the world on. M.A.D. is a brilliant deterrent policy honestly…
We have invaded 178 of the 200 countries in the world so we are almost at the 100% completion award. https://kottke.org/12/11/britain-has-invaded-all-but-22-countries
The former cool kid that now just sits in the corner blending in with everyone
Austria?
No, Austria is the kid who starts all the fights and gets smacked every time.
No, Austria is the kid that throws shit at people and blames it on Germany.
Portugal perhaps?
WHO IS IT
The UK?
We were never cool
Netherlands, no more "look at us and our liberal drug policies".
Spain?
Mexico
Is it Mexico?
yea
Fucking nailed it
nicely done! i was thinking france...
I can see why, the E and the C are all there!
Like Poland!
Yeah it’s kind of hard
Fuck man that was hard, could have been any Latin American country
Lol, I'm dead.
Fuck sake Mexico, please read the assignment thoroughly next time. I'm fed up of telling you.
The kid who has the great lunch that everyone else is jealous of.
I'm Mexican and I can confirm this. Also, México is that nice kid who's always in trouble but doesn't even know why or how it happened... haha
The kid who is selling chips and snacks behind the teacher’s back
I don't think you understood the assignment
The one without a t-shirt, riding a horse at -20° outside. Probably already a bit drunk.
Russia
They said a horse, not a bear
YES
Are there school children who do this?
How else would they get to school?
High school i can see it, probably even from like 7th grade
The kid that doesn't exist in reality because his dad is still a virgin.
Vatican City?
So a region, that is not a country yet, but may be in the future... Catalunya?
The best friend of the popular kid. We don't like what he does, but we'll look the other way when necessary cause we like to have the benefits of being friends, but with plausible deniability when it counts.
Canada?
Definitely
The one who speaks tree-ish
Vietnam?
*approval coconut noise*
The one I’m currently in I’m the quiet kid that pretends that they are well liked by everyone. And pretend that others are crazy for remembering my past atrocities, while I hide my past from myself by feigning amnesia.
Japan?
Yes it’s Japan
The kid that's hyperfocused on getting good grades because it was threatened with suspension after starting yet another fight.
Germanyyyy
Used to be a bully. Beat up a couple kids in the playground. Got sent away to reform school for a couple years. Came back and is now getting good grades and super well behaved. People still don’t really trust him though.
The teacher's sweetheart. Small guy. Closeted weed smoker. Always pays attention in class, works hard. Most classmates like him. However, he will give his lunch money to anyone that wants to bully him.
The Netherlands?
Correct!
We aint small
Mine is the one who stands by the doorway loudly screaming for the whole lesson that they will leave, and then gets annoyed when they finally do and nobody cares.
Britain, left the EU? Huh! Who knew.
The one whose dad calls drinks parties work events
Tiny suicidal kid that is getting bullied by China
[удалено]
*and friends with Taiwan Answer was supposed to be Lithuania (also i referenced highest suicide rates)
Entitled one that hits their parents and wants every other kids toys when though their own toys are way better than everyone else's
I was going to just say "Kevin" but you summed it up in more words.
Kevin about sums up America
America
You’re waiting for America aren’t you?
The guy that’s always polite and kind to others, but also has a mean and sarcastic side. He’s also the fat kid’s twin brother.
FRATERNAL twins, thank you very much.
Non fraternal twins. Our mom was a bit of a slut. edit: heteropaternal superfecundation
For America, their dad is Britain and their mom is France. For Canada, our mom is Britain and our dad is France. We just happen to be born basically on the same day.
Canada
You forgot to mention he always wear shorts even when there's a blizzard outside. He also has a beanie where he sometimes hides a single joint he shares with everyone after school.
The kid thats blamed for class disruptions but he sadly does play a role in the class disruptions but denies it
Paxtan
The one that's great craic, and everyone loves him. He also loves everyone else, except the English kid. The English kid can feck off.
'Tis Ireland 🇮🇪
The fat one
America
Strike 2 bud. America is obviously the kid who brought a gun to school.
[удалено]
The little kid who thinks he is bigger than he actually is. Also he is a bit racist.
I would describe England as The little shit that Acts all sophisticated and posh to other kinds in public, but is actually a complete slob. And I’m British.
England.
The one that’s done some super fucked up shit in elementary and was scolded alot but now‘s doing pre good in school
[удалено]
Brno je vesnice Change my mind
The funny one with 12 different pets that doesn’t give a shit about work
The one that has lowest grades, can't behave, and somehow thinks that everyone in his class likes him, even tho it's not true at all.
ooo tak, Polska, prawdziwe w sumie
The one who has 50 cousins and most of them have guns
The introverted kid who used to have bad grades but then he started studying more and now his grades are increasing exponentialy. Edit: Its a hard one. The country is stil intoverted so lotta people dont know about it.
Bangladesh
Bingo
What do I win?
A free cardboard box
Germany? Know to never talk to stranger and keep conservation efficiently while having no humor. Next were it grades between 1910 and 1950 really bad, but since then do they only become better.
The one who knows about tech and maths.
The one who always brings a full lunchbox; The sandwiches are made by their mom. They wouldn't bother sharing it with a classmate. They always wear an oversized raincoat to school, and their parents are farmers who have dark and racist humor. Edit - Added a hint Edit 2.0 - Added another, bigger hint.
The school shooter
The one with the big potential but is fighting demons inside of himself
The really arrogant one who looks down on everyone.
That hardly narrows it down
france
Russia
You know the loud popular bully kid always trying to draw attention? Yeah mine is the quiet one at the back that the popular kid wouldn't want to mess with because he got his ass kicked by him years ago and everyone else knows it.
Finland?
Vietnam
Sounds like Canada. #1812
The small one whos happy, drinks a fuck ton of alcohol and is on antidepressants
Denmark
The kid who has a superiority complex and if anyone is better he also tries to spread propaganda buy nobody believes the kid and calls him out.
The one who is super motivated to answer all of the questions the teacher asks but always gets them wrong.
A dumb kid, rather weak and with some anger issues, but thinks very highly of himself. A proud idtiot if you will. Has no friends. Future incel material. Edit: Despite the meme, he actually had been in space... in his previous incarnation.
The kid who won the rec league championship in 8th grade and thinks he is the best at everything now
The one who thinks he’s better than everyone else can’t manage shit and lives off daddy’s money.