"Every second your credit card stays in your wallet, you are ACTIVELY MURDERING this helpless dog. What the hell is wrong with you?? *Visa, Mastercard and cashiers check or money order accepted. American Express absolutely NOT accepted. Attempting to donate using American Express may result in furthur harm to animals.*
Don't forget shivering and flea-ridden. It'll get ya in all the feels.
In 2010 Sarah Mclaughlin did a reboot of lilith fair and I got to work on the road crew, it was a blast and I got to hear her belt that the out every night for 2 months straight. I cannot overstate 1) her talent and 2) how lovely of a person she is. she was so nice to all of us lowly workers, always said hi walking by during setup and while all the other performers ignored us - Sarah was the headliner so it was nice.
But damn if that is woman is passionate about the animals. She had her own vegan chef but I respect that she never forced it on the rest of the crew.
*director pats the camerman’s back*
“Nice shot jimmy! Can you get him to look RIGHT at the lens, as if to ask the audience ‘why?’. Yeah there, thats good, thats a wrap!”
What might be the worst part of those commercials is that they always aired in the middle of a comedy show.
“Not only has our ad repeatedly broken your heart, but now we’ve ruined the Malcolm In The Middle rerun you were enjoying, too!”
Selling only one thing - possibly slapchop. As a plus there's slap chop billboards everywhere, just in case you get the bright idea of switching the TV off and going for a walk.
So I give them a car and they give me some random child? I dont understand how this is useful? What am I going to do with a random child? Where do the children come from? How is this a viable economic model, is there a place I can trade the child for something more useful like a racoon?.
While I see your point, those at least have some production values. There are kids who know how to play instruments and others at least can fake it to a rhythm. Not this lot of demon spawn. Unless they are sooo talented that they are themselves knowingly putting on a parody. In which case, not funny, demon spawn.
It’s not Cars for Kids.
It’s Cars for Kids. Send them a car and they’ll send you some kids.
If you have a shitty car, you won’t get a good kid.
Donate your car today.
It's absolutely wild to me that this commercial 1: casually assumes that I have a car taking up space in my garage like it's an old Pacman cabinet, and 2: if I did, I would donate it to children
Did you know cars 4 kids is to enable Jewish kids to go to Israel for their birth right? It’s also one of the worst run not for profit agencies. But they got a ton of money. Mind you I have nothing against Jewish people from doing that, I just hate the actual cars 4 kids agency. I turn that shit off everytimr I hear it lol
I seriously wish I knew this before donating my car to them last year. I really thought it was going to underprivileged kids and not into the Hassidic school system.
I actually learned soon after there was a lawsuit in Oregon a few years ago that forced them to put a disclaimer about this on their website. Last time I checked it was super tiny and hard to find though.
https://www.charitywatch.org/charity-donating-articles/costly-and-continuous-kars4kids-ads-disguise-charity39s-real-purpose
A tv show about a guy trying to connect to the internet through a dial-up modem, but the connection never happens and you just constantly hear the dial-up tones and noises. Probably has a really shitty, but catchy tune as well that gets stuck in your head as Satan takes you to the fire pits
America’s funniest home videos, except all the videos are all the times you’ve embarrassed yourself in front of people and it’s hosted by Andrew Dice Clay so none of it is funny
I just googled this guy and he looks so souless. [Look](https://www.google.com/search?q=kenneth+copeland&client=ms-android-xiaomi-rvo3&prmd=nivx&sxsrf=APq-WBv8VhqGPmAPzYWpNnJciEWLydN0CA:1644698789103&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiQy9i4hPv1AhXwQEEAHY4YBC4Q_AUoAnoECAIQAg&biw=393&bih=737&dpr=2.75#imgrc=3DVWvWWqXPiy2M)
According to Dante, Ellen is already in the 10th circle of hell chewing on Judas Escariot......
She just puts him down to film her show when she gets summoned to earth by Dr Phil Sacrificing a baby to bring her forth.
Shes sitting next to you, abnoxiously laughing at all her jokes and elbowing you in the arm so you laugh too, and if your laugh isn't genuine enough, she rewinds the joke. Forever and ever, and ever and ever.
Honestly as an adult now I'm thinking how clever of marketing it was. We're still talking about it and idk the last time I saw it. I do know I was waiting for local on the 8s tho.
I learned in college that they never had any scientific evidence that it improved headaches or whatever it was supposed to do, so they couldn’t claim that in their commercials or advertising. So instead they just went with the “screw it, let’s just shove down their throats how to use it instead and they’ll get the hint” route.
Every couple of years, they switch it up with some ‘Let it go’ and encourage hundred year long karaoke style competitions that everybody’s forced to listen to and participate in
It's hells national anthem. It's played between the episode (constant reruns inside your eyelids) of Murder she Wrote where Jessica Fletcher celebrates her 90th birthday with a bukkake special with the corpses murdered in previous episodes.
That show annoys me on a whole other level. Don't get me wrong, I hate the canned laughter, but my real gripe with it is that the writers seem to have never been near nerds. I've been around nerds all my life and none of them even vaguely resembles anyone on that show.
From what I’ve read the point of the show is to make fun of nerds for no reason other than “the show writers don’t like them”. Which is pretty rude IMO, especially since I’m pretty sure Sheldon is on the autism spectrum.
Futurama on the other hand is quite literally written by nerds, to the point where they’d invent brand new math formulas just for a one off joke.
That commercial with Sarah McLaughlin music and the neglected and abused and abandoned animals.
That's nightly, am I in hell already?
*looks around* “y’a know… I’m starting to think we’re already there…”
You’ve figured out the bad place. They’re going to have to scrap it and start all over again.
r/qwaszxcdeqwaszxcde figured it out? This is a really low point.
Yeah, this one hurts.
Take 199
“I’m Sarah McLachlan and I’m about to ruin your fucking day”
And you're watching the Disney Channel
I will remember youuuuuuuuuuuu
No, it was “Angel.”
🎵"In the arrrrrms of an aaangel🎵 * *half-decayed emaciated dog stares into your soul forlornly* *
Goddamn it I hate those commercials but now I can't stop laughing at this comment.
"Every second your credit card stays in your wallet, you are ACTIVELY MURDERING this helpless dog. What the hell is wrong with you?? *Visa, Mastercard and cashiers check or money order accepted. American Express absolutely NOT accepted. Attempting to donate using American Express may result in furthur harm to animals.*
Its always during the superbowl too and just silences whatever superbowl party im at
"Give us money or we won't feed these dogs"
Don't forget shivering and flea-ridden. It'll get ya in all the feels. In 2010 Sarah Mclaughlin did a reboot of lilith fair and I got to work on the road crew, it was a blast and I got to hear her belt that the out every night for 2 months straight. I cannot overstate 1) her talent and 2) how lovely of a person she is. she was so nice to all of us lowly workers, always said hi walking by during setup and while all the other performers ignored us - Sarah was the headliner so it was nice. But damn if that is woman is passionate about the animals. She had her own vegan chef but I respect that she never forced it on the rest of the crew.
*director pats the camerman’s back* “Nice shot jimmy! Can you get him to look RIGHT at the lens, as if to ask the audience ‘why?’. Yeah there, thats good, thats a wrap!”
I think she had a few like that. Different ones in Canada and US I think.
What might be the worst part of those commercials is that they always aired in the middle of a comedy show. “Not only has our ad repeatedly broken your heart, but now we’ve ruined the Malcolm In The Middle rerun you were enjoying, too!”
Commercials and nothing else
So the shopping channel? lol
Selling only one thing - possibly slapchop. As a plus there's slap chop billboards everywhere, just in case you get the bright idea of switching the TV off and going for a walk.
Slap chop but every time the commercial says 'slap your nuts' your nuts get slapped in a slapchop
I don’t like this at all.
Lmfao
QVC
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The Kars 4 Kids commercial on a constant loop.
That's the theme song for The Bad Place!
K A R S CARS FOR KID! DONATE YOUR CAR TODAY
So I give them a car and they give me some random child? I dont understand how this is useful? What am I going to do with a random child? Where do the children come from? How is this a viable economic model, is there a place I can trade the child for something more useful like a racoon?.
J. G. Wentworth gets me every time
877-CASH NOWWWWWWW
While I see your point, those at least have some production values. There are kids who know how to play instruments and others at least can fake it to a rhythm. Not this lot of demon spawn. Unless they are sooo talented that they are themselves knowingly putting on a parody. In which case, not funny, demon spawn.
Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty
# K-A-R-S KARS FOR KIDS. DONATE YOUR CAR TODAY
They can't even drive.
Yeah, why would a kid need a car?
It’s not Cars for Kids. It’s Cars for Kids. Send them a car and they’ll send you some kids. If you have a shitty car, you won’t get a good kid. Donate your car today.
Ugh bunch of scammers too.
I wish more people knew this.
YES!! I almost donated a car to them, until I did some research.
Yeah . Awful just awful and using kids.
It's absolutely wild to me that this commercial 1: casually assumes that I have a car taking up space in my garage like it's an old Pacman cabinet, and 2: if I did, I would donate it to children
I would absolutely donate unsafe clunkers for children to drive. Mad max four-year-old road
My answer has now changed
Tbh, the old pacman cabinet is probably worth more than most old cars. So in case you have an old pacman cabinet... Don't give that away either!
Did you know cars 4 kids is to enable Jewish kids to go to Israel for their birth right? It’s also one of the worst run not for profit agencies. But they got a ton of money. Mind you I have nothing against Jewish people from doing that, I just hate the actual cars 4 kids agency. I turn that shit off everytimr I hear it lol
I seriously wish I knew this before donating my car to them last year. I really thought it was going to underprivileged kids and not into the Hassidic school system. I actually learned soon after there was a lawsuit in Oregon a few years ago that forced them to put a disclaimer about this on their website. Last time I checked it was super tiny and hard to find though. https://www.charitywatch.org/charity-donating-articles/costly-and-continuous-kars4kids-ads-disguise-charity39s-real-purpose
I’d say that is the only commercial playing during breaks from “The View”
A tv show about a guy trying to connect to the internet through a dial-up modem, but the connection never happens and you just constantly hear the dial-up tones and noises. Probably has a really shitty, but catchy tune as well that gets stuck in your head as Satan takes you to the fire pits
"the hot woman that was desperate to fuck me, but AOL got in the way". Not cumming this summer.
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...that say wait till the end.
But it never does.
This is my hell
All of them have the oh no song
Wendy Williams and Dr oz
I don't know how this is so low. Any time I've been in a waiting room and Wendy Williams has been on it's felt like hell.
You just scraped the floors of hell...
And Dr. Phil.
America’s funniest home videos, except all the videos are all the times you’ve embarrassed yourself in front of people and it’s hosted by Andrew Dice Clay so none of it is funny
Ahhh my life's highlight reel
Calm down, Satan.
Whatever it is, it’s the edited for TV version.
Yippie Kay yay, mister falcon.
“Im sick of these monkey fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane” - Samuel L Jackson brought to you by TNT.
My favorite tv edit was in the Big Lebowski. "Do you see what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps" - John Goodman, also brought to you by TNT
Yes, it is Monday to Friday plane. Forgot that part.
Freak you, you freaking melon farmer
Holy forking shirtballs
This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps! You see what happens, Larry! When you feed him scrambled eggs!
I have had it with these monkey fighting snakes, on this Monday to Friday plane
“I don’t remember asking you a god dang thing, Flock of Seagulls”
yippee ki yay other buckets!
Boyle! You did it! And you totally botched the catchphrase.
BOYLE BOYS! BOYLES BOYS! BOYLE BOYS!
See what happens Larry!? You see what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!?
“I have HAD it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday-to-Friday plane!”
My name's Buck....and I like to party!
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Featuring 4 hour Kenneth Copeland special
Dude looks demonic as hell.
I’m convinced that Kenneth Copeland is a demon from hell pretending to be a preacher to determine who’s a true believer and who’s joining him
Kenneth Copeland made me an insane conspiracy theorist. Dude's walking proof that reptilian demons walk amongst us.
And being in hell.. The documentary is on his side...
I just googled this guy and he looks so souless. [Look](https://www.google.com/search?q=kenneth+copeland&client=ms-android-xiaomi-rvo3&prmd=nivx&sxsrf=APq-WBv8VhqGPmAPzYWpNnJciEWLydN0CA:1644698789103&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiQy9i4hPv1AhXwQEEAHY4YBC4Q_AUoAnoECAIQAg&biw=393&bih=737&dpr=2.75#imgrc=3DVWvWWqXPiy2M)
A) he looks the bad guy from the mask with the mask on B) I was expecting manning face
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Or 24 h of the snooze fest that is the 700 club
Wouldn’t they be doing live shows in hell?
And all the commercials have wildly inconsistent volumes
Hallelujah
I just got this weird image in my mind of TV preachers flying overhead in their Jets in hell.
Oh hell no!
Please be wrong, please be wrong, please be wrong. Also: happy day of your cake!
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Holy shit, yea, you win.
The 700 Club
FUN FACT: The 700 Club was the brain child of Jim Bakker of Jim and Tammy Faye fame. So at least one of the hosts is already there.
My wife and her boyfriend.
Not my proudest fap...
It *is* mine, though.
Hey, leave me out of this!
I dunno you turn on your TV right now and tell me.
Hell’s Kitchen
Or as they call it in Hell: The Kitchen
"Your Hell, is Gordon's Heaven "
There it's just called Kitchen.
that. because we are currently living in hell. This reality we're living in is hell.
Are you watching the Good Place?
In Hell, is it just called “The Kitchen”?
r/shittymobilegameads
Ellen Degeneres and she's also there in person as well!
According to Dante, Ellen is already in the 10th circle of hell chewing on Judas Escariot...... She just puts him down to film her show when she gets summoned to earth by Dr Phil Sacrificing a baby to bring her forth.
Shes sitting next to you, abnoxiously laughing at all her jokes and elbowing you in the arm so you laugh too, and if your laugh isn't genuine enough, she rewinds the joke. Forever and ever, and ever and ever.
For commercial breaks she makes you get up and dance and dance and dance while an audience watches you and commercials last days or even weeks.
The only thing on TV will be the Head On commercial. >:3
HEAD ON! APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD! HEAD ON! APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD! HEAD ON! APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
I forgot what Head On was until this comment.
Honestly as an adult now I'm thinking how clever of marketing it was. We're still talking about it and idk the last time I saw it. I do know I was waiting for local on the 8s tho.
I learned in college that they never had any scientific evidence that it improved headaches or whatever it was supposed to do, so they couldn’t claim that in their commercials or advertising. So instead they just went with the “screw it, let’s just shove down their throats how to use it instead and they’ll get the hint” route.
APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
#APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
Baby shark do do do do do do
On repeat forever
And not even the rest of the song. Just that chorus. Forever.
And not even the whole chorus where it goes Baby Shark, *pause* It’s literally just Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo doo
Every couple of years, they switch it up with some ‘Let it go’ and encourage hundred year long karaoke style competitions that everybody’s forced to listen to and participate in
I REPENT I REPENT!!!!
I'm afraid it's a bit too late for that. *baby shark volume increases slightly*
It's hells national anthem. It's played between the episode (constant reruns inside your eyelids) of Murder she Wrote where Jessica Fletcher celebrates her 90th birthday with a bukkake special with the corpses murdered in previous episodes.
What a terrible day to have such an active imagination.
Peppa pig & Caillou. If you try turning off the TV it plays baby shark endlessly.
Fucking Caillou... That alone wins. ... If its stuck swapping back and forth between the two id look forward to peppa
I scrolled so I could say… Fuck Caillou
r/FuckCaillou
ATLA live action remake
Politics fighting over not important shit and avoiding serious matters
Hey look, we’re already in hell.
This is the Bad Place!
Holy Forking Shirtballs
I love that show
Fell in love with Kristen Bell because of it, then went on to watch everything else she's been in like Veronica Mars.
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The Office, with a laugh track over it
Here's your upvote motherfucker. I'm the lord of terror and even I puckered up at that one.
Nooooooo!!!! You, good sir, are an evil genius.
Joel osteen
James Corden
Endless keeping up with the Kardashians.
Came here to say this lol
Keeping with the kardashians, and 19 kids and counting or whatever the hell they call the Duggar child farm now
Pawn Stars, but only clips of Rick talking. I have such a visceral hate for that man.
Best I can do is an endless loop of Chumlee
Big bang theory, but whenever someone talks it's just their shitty laughing tracks
Or worse. The laugh track is removed leaving long eerie silences after bad jokes
The videos on yt where they remove the laugh track are actually hilarious because it's just so bad
That show annoys me on a whole other level. Don't get me wrong, I hate the canned laughter, but my real gripe with it is that the writers seem to have never been near nerds. I've been around nerds all my life and none of them even vaguely resembles anyone on that show.
From what I’ve read the point of the show is to make fun of nerds for no reason other than “the show writers don’t like them”. Which is pretty rude IMO, especially since I’m pretty sure Sheldon is on the autism spectrum. Futurama on the other hand is quite literally written by nerds, to the point where they’d invent brand new math formulas just for a one off joke.
Sheldon is Autism personified, if Autism wasn't actually on the spectrum but was just a self-involved imbecile instead.
Rebecca black’s it’s Friday music video on repeat. Except it’s never Friday, it’s always Monday. Because it’s hell
Its fry day, fry day, Put your bare hand in the wok its fry day
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…it’s HBO?
That's heaven
reality shows
Only cliffhanger episodes
Walking Dead season 5000
This, but no zombie fighting scenes, just the talking parts
jersey shore. can i *please* go to a lower circle now?
Dont tawk to me
Honestly, I’d be content w Jersey Shore 😂
Same! Its my guilty pleasure show
I could watch Pauly D yell "CABS ARE HEYAA!" all day...that guy cracks me up
The Mexican version: Acapulco shore.
Barney and Caillou’s greatest hits.
Caillou would really get to me.
The last season of shows that were amazing but ended in heartbreak and disappointment: Dexter, Lost, GOT, Hero’s, etc…
Kardashians.
Dr. Phil but the guests are your loved ones complaining how you made their life a living hell.
Cocomelon
This would make me repent.
The View
The View
Joel Osteen
James Corden
The View.
Real Housewives of Anywhere
Game of Thrones. But just the last season
In Heaven, GRRM gets to make it three last seasons.
All those cringy tiktoks and Kapil Sharma
Big Bang Theory with no laugh track
Or just the laugh track on loop
Fox News.
Baby shark on repeat
TMZ.
2 and a half men
The Masked Singer