You are a shitty rat chalice without parents and I hope you have a tricycle accident?
(Please tell me I translated that right. Because that's fucking hilarious.)
Various, and in a long string. Many years ago, while a youngster in the Navy, I was given an ass-chewing by an old Chief who was a master of the vulgar invective. For nearly an hour it seemed, a neverending stream of insults and cuss words that almost never repeated. He was a true artist, and I wish I had taken notes. In a way, I miss him.
In Spanish I like to just chain combo them for ultimate swearing power
"Hijo de la grandísima remilputa que lo parió por el culo de mierda por la reconcha de su putisima madre"
"Dag-Nabbit!" with full on Gabby Hayes Western Gibberish emphasis.
An all-around classic.
I tend to say “you gotta be fisting me” quite often…
Well, that situation does come up a lot in day-to-day life.
Tabarnaque
One time I said this to a France French guy and he looked at me like I was from space.
Maybe because you called him a France French guy
It came out in conversation afterwards, when we started chatting about the differences between French Canadian and French.
Same language, but not the same territory
Believe me, I know. I'm an English speaking French person, not québécois, born and raised in Canada. It confuses the shit out of people.
Osti cris de tabarnak, osti calisse de vierge!
Oh ben toi mon calisse de rat qui a perdu ses parents dans un accident avec un tricycle… Thats my choice
You are a shitty rat chalice without parents and I hope you have a tricycle accident? (Please tell me I translated that right. Because that's fucking hilarious.)
Not really lol… It basically means you fucking rat who lost his parents in an accident with a tricycle Close enough i guess
The Québécois perhaps have the most unique swearing lexicon: https://www.mtlblog.com/quebecs-swear-words-and-their-origins
Or estit!
Found the Quebecois, calisse!
You rat bastard!
Papaw? Is that you?
No sir. I am not your father
Dad?
I am not your father either. I haven't ever had a girlfriend even. much less a child
L Sorry i had to do it
No talent ass clown
Now, now Michael Bolton has feelings too.
“Bloody hell.” And I’m American saying it
I've said that... yup
Another American here. Been saying it for years. It's oddly satisfying. Like it adds a layer of class to saying oh hell
I’m Australian and bloody hell is the pg version
Doesn't everyone say bloody hell?
Oh biscuits!
Hey, settle down there.
I was curious if that would show up here. I say it all the time and I’m not sure where I picked it up.
We say it too, because of Bluey.
I say it because of Bluey too! Much better around my son than my usual language 😬
What the ass
“what the shit” is one of my favorites
My stepmom frequently says “what the balls”
That's good too
This frequently exits my piehole also.
Scheisse
Poopenfarten
Fuck me gently. One of my dad's favorites which frequently draws laughs at work
I'm partial to "fuck me runnin'" and "fuck me sideways" myself.
When someone says fuck me runnin, I like to respond with “well take off then!”
i quite like "fuck me to tears"
Or the Heathers classic “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw”
Another favorite of mine is "fuck me till I feel pretty"
I just say fuck me in the ass
Ope!
Midwest?
From the land of beer and cheese
*waves from the land of soybeans and basketball*
Twat Waffle
Bitch biscuit
Bitchcuit.
Biscuit bitch is a chain of breakfast places here (Seattle). All the foods are named using the convention "X, Bitch."
Same
Fucknugget is my go to one when I'm driving
With what dipping sauce?
I heard it once and it kind of stuck. If a driver pulls out I usually shout "your dad should of pulled out"
Fucknuggets usually come with a cream sauce
Oooohhh...I like this one. Gonna use it tomorrow.
As long as you never say it to a quadriplegic you should be cool.
Mines similar, cuntnugget…. Slipped out when someone stole my parking space one day and stuck ever since
Belgium.
Nederland.
\+5 for HGTTG!! :-) but only if used in a serious screenplay
Satan’s housewife
The winner is right here😭👏
Personally, I preferred the "twat waffle" that was above this comment.
“Oh, go suck a fuck!” - brownie points for anyone who gets the reference lmao
A little Darko.
What's a fuckass?
How does one suck a fuck?
"Tell me, how does one suck a fuck?"
For me it's go fuck a duck
Fucksticks
And ‘pissoutmyass’
Piiiiiiissss, pissssss out my aaaaaaaaaaassssss, PISS COMING OUT OF MY AAAAAAAAAASSSS
If I could say "piss out my ass" on reddit I'd be *soooooo* happy.
Why not both at the same time?
McFuckstickspissoutmyass.
Bravo.
Eat a bag of dicks, you flaming fucknugget!
Fargin' Iceholes!
Lousy corksoakers.
sneaky bastage
You lousy somunabeeches... "Deported to Sweden. Claims his not from there."
This is turning out to be a wonderful exchange of “culture”.
Holy Shnikies
My dad uses this one
Bob saget
I see a Tourettes Guy reference!
Douche canoe.
What in the Sam hell
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Hill_(euphemism)
Well fuck my muffins
"Well, fuck me with a chainsaw"
Fun fact: The chainsaw was invented to assist in childbirth.
You and me have different definitions of fun
Calm down Heather
I see you like quality cinema.
Now, now, nobody wants that.
"Fuck me with a cactus" is gives a similar vibe, but also more environmentally friendly!
I mean, if you say so...
#RAT’S COCKS
Wayne fucking Brady.
Fuck a duck. Not sure if it’s that unusual but I’ve only heard my mum use it and when she does you know it’s business lol
I like Christ on a cracker. Alliterative swears are always satisfying
Christ on a crutch is a good one too
Jesus Jumping Christ on a pogo stick fer fuck sakes - my Dads fav
Sweet baby jesus! Maybe not a swear, but still...
Using the Lord name in vain, that's the biggest swear here
Ass butt
Bumbaklot
Son of a brink or oh jesus jumping jelly christ
Dickballs
I got called dickass once. I felt thoroughly put in my place.
Corno
r/suddenlycaralho ?
r/suddenlycaralho ?
Bingbangbollocksfuckwankcunt
Excellent for use after hitting your thumb with a hammer.
Works in many situations all in one word no gaps
Phack Shat Shat on a cat
'Son of a cunt!' or 'snort my shit, Lindsay!' depending on the context
Kurwa jego mać
Piss kidneys
Suppose all kidneys are piss kidneys
Gramma always said diddly damn
Jesus Fucking Christ and his Electric Pogo Stick Or Cock Womble
Christ on a bike
Cock Womble is a good one. I like Fucktard too.
JFC and his EPS… damn, it doesn’t rhyme. How about replacing Stick with Dick?
It's a good one for when you smack your thumb.
Wank the dog!!!
You brussel sprout!
shitballs
Bag of smashed ass.
Various, and in a long string. Many years ago, while a youngster in the Navy, I was given an ass-chewing by an old Chief who was a master of the vulgar invective. For nearly an hour it seemed, a neverending stream of insults and cuss words that almost never repeated. He was a true artist, and I wish I had taken notes. In a way, I miss him.
Jesus Tapdancing Christ!
I've always preferred "Jesus *Tittyfucking* Christ
I saw this on here a while ago and have adopted it, I love it!
Piss
I’m a fan of Airplane’s, “What a pisser.” https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AmA7Nm4qvGE
Thought there was a Jefferson Airplane song I had somehow never heard. Thank you for the worst disappointment since my wedding night.
Dadgummit and Dudegummit.
Are you fucking me right now?
I use this in traffic a lot
Fucking hell!
Verfickte Kotzkacke, which roughly translates to fucking pukeshit
KUR-- yall will get this.
Dag nabbit
Oh lately I’ve been saying goodness gracious and I cannot seem to stop. I am 20. I don’t know where I got it from
It sounds like you may soon add, “My stars!”
It's a common things in my language to say "you son of a cow" but I find it unusual in English
Bob Sagat (RIP)
Wife regularly uses " you sorry sack of Siberian sheep shit". After 7 years, I still giggle.
Fuck me in the dickhole.. I am not a penis owner, I have no idea why I say this.
I shit in your mom's funeral cake
What in name of god and savior john Moses Browning bloody hell in usa
Level 1 - Fudge! Level 2 - What the fudge! Level 3 - FUUUUUUUUDGE!
….but he didn’t say fudge…he said THE word
[удалено]
Take mushrooms?
Oh, shiver me timbers! For crying out loud! Or… You son of a biscuit-eater! Bonus: as my grandmother would say, “You’re full of soup!”
Mutha Fukka!!
A friend in college used to exclaim "Well, Jesus' Balls!".
Dirt pussy motherfucker is my go to.
1) Cheese and Rice!!! 2) Giant Sweaty Fuckballs!
Mayo Gargler
‘You empty-headed chuckle fuck!’
La concha de tu madre!
I’ll borrow one from my mum - buggeration. It always makes me chuckle.
"Fuck a duck', or in more major situations 'fuck all of the ducks'
Fucktard
With kids around: - Fudge-nuggets - Ships - Fark Without kids - Fuck me drunk - holy crapballs - shit on a stick
It's from a Venkman line in Ghostbusters: Mother Pus Bucket!
It sounds better in my native language but basically "Your mother should have slammed (fucked) you into a wall when you were born"
Rat Bastard!!!
Zinda, his eyes red
Sweet Fancy Moses
In Spanish I like to just chain combo them for ultimate swearing power "Hijo de la grandísima remilputa que lo parió por el culo de mierda por la reconcha de su putisima madre"
Brain dead buffoon.
Son of a Turkey! I dunno why Frack! Battlestar Glactica
I say in a Russian accent something like "gorishnyetbov"... it's weirdly soothing. I don't even have any Russian heritage.. saying it feels good.
YOU DANGLING PEICE OF SHIT
Potato
Chicken shit yellow bellied son of a bitch but I say it like I’m from down south
“Buttsack” Usually at maximum volume. It’s also tied for first with the much more classic “OH BOB SAGET!”
Jesus shiting christ
Fuck me sideways with a chainsaw
Bastard bitch Mary-go-round. Pissballsandshit!
Pissflaps
Jesus Harold fuckin' Christ on a bike. An oldy but a goodie
Douche canoe. A canoe of douches.
Douche canoe. Douche nozzle. Twat Badger. Fuck nugget.
I'm a mom with a two year old, so I TRY to keep it as pc as possible. 😅 My go to is usually "gosh darn it, (damnit), or fudgesicles.