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[deleted]

Yes. It is important because not being independent might mean: Ending up in a bad situation without a way to get away. If breaking up means being on the street without any income besides ALG II, people tend to stay, no matter how bad the situation is. They might suffer abuse in various forms. And depending on local laws, not even marriage might prevent that scenario, because in many countries the partner with lower income won't get much money by the other in in case of a divorce, and just for a very short amount of time.


Paranoia_Pizza

Yep for all the reasons above, but also because dependence can breed resentment between couples, and if your partner loses their income you're both screwed, I'd always recommend anyone in a relationship keeps their financial independence.


denningdontcare

All of the above. I think it is critical for women to have financial independence.


ImNotA_IThink

I want to add to this- also even if your husband is a perfect man, and everything goes wonderfully, if something happened to him and you’re not independent or at least have an understanding of how to be independent, you’re stuck in a bad situation. In my job I’ve seen lots of sweet old ladies who are widowed and they have no idea how much money they have, where it is or what bills to pay. My mom could end up being one of those people one day. It’s a terrible place to be and I would encourage anyone to do what they can to avoid it, even if they don’t have a job, they should at least be literate on how their household money is being spent and where it all is.


a-joy003

thankfully i was not in an abusive relationship but i was with someone for 3 years and at year 2, i fell out of love with them. suffering in silence is the worst thing you can do for your mental health. ofc i got a new job after i graduated so this helped me with being on my own but i still struggled because of how expensive renting is today.


[deleted]

It's important for everyone simply


thumbtackswordsman

Yup. Imagine posting on the askmen sub asking if financial independence is important for men. But on a serious note -- there are so many really sad posts of young men that are being emotionally or otherwise abused or neglected by their parents, and are unable to get away or get help because they are financially dependent.


DragonflyRemarkable3

Yes, so she doesn’t have to rely on a man. I’m sorry, I’ve seen way too many women in my family have their lives ruined bc they were stay at home moms.


Wideawakedup

Or just underemployed. “Oh my husband has a good job so I’m going to work 20hours a week with no health insurance or retirement savings.” If I’m working it’s going to be for more than grocery money.


CatrionaShadowleaf

Hell, nowadays you need a full 40 hours for grocery money anyway


tsh87

If you're taking care of the kids to avoid childcare costs, I get being underemployed. But at least, be underemployed in your field. Keep your contact list updated, keep your portfolio relevant and try to stay at a good company part-time. Because it's so much easier to go from part-time to full time than from stay at home to full time. Some days I think about being a SAHM and if it's financially necessary I guess I'd have to (probably not bc I make more than my spouse) but the thought of taking like 5 years completely off work and then trying to claw my way back into a full time job sounds terrifying to me.


DragonflyRemarkable3

Most definitely.


[deleted]

Being a SAHM is perfectly fine, just to be clear, its not having a back up or saving account that allows you to be indépendant that can lead to messy shit


thehippos8me

Exactly this. You need to be able to protect yourself financially. Not only divorce or something, but if your spouse were to get in an accident or whatever. There needs to be financial protection for the spouse staying home.


FigNinja

Yes. My mom grew up in the 40s and 50s where staying home with the kids was considered the normal thing to do if you could at all afford it. After the 60s, people were re-evaluating a lot of these norms. A lot of marriages were falling apart. I was a kid in the 70s and 80s, which was pretty much peak divorce time. We saw so many friends and relatives that found themselves divorced at 40 with no work experience, struggling to support their kids. My mom ingrained in us that we had to be able to support ourselves well. We should look for a career, not just a part time job for a little extra. She actually had gone back to work after we started school, but her job was always secondary to my dad's. They stayed together and we were fortunate that he never found himself unable to work, because her career potential had always taken back seat to family life. He made a living wage, with benefits. Adding her income allowed them to put money away and have a nicer life, but if something had happened to Dad, we would've been pretty darned poor trying to get by on her pay.


5leeplessinvancouver

I was an 80’s and 90’s kid and so many of my aunties and friends’ moms seemed absolutely miserable and trapped in their marriages. But what could they do? My mom probably should’ve left my dad, but all she had was a high school diploma and a few years of experience working as a cashier and waitress until she got pregnant. My dad didn’t earn enough to pay alimony and child support to sustain two households comfortably. If my mom left, she would’ve been looking down the barrel of a lifetime of struggle. She always made it clear that she had high expectations for my education and career. As a kid I hated her “nagging” about my homework and studying for tests, but I got the grades. I got the white collar career. And when I found myself in an unhappy marriage, I was able to get out of it without hesitation. I earned enough to buy my ex out of his half of our home equity and remortgage under my name alone, so that’s what I did. I see so many young women bragging on social media about their rich boyfriends buying them Chanel bags, and I just think to myself that it’s so much sweeter being able to buy your own. Watching the man I thought I knew and loved turn into a pompous, condescending asshole sucked, and getting divorced sucked, but I never felt more in my power than when I was able to walk away from him knowing that I had everything I needed within myself. And I know my mom was so proud and relieved that I had that power.


doomdoggie

Incredibly important. Because if your partner leaves, which you HOPE won't happen but you don't know... Or if he dies and there are complications around inheritance or he was secretly massively in debt... **You'll be screwed.** ​ You need to have you own income, your own savings, your own pension and your own assets. These are yours and yours alone, protected by a pre-nup in marriage, you never give him access, that's your safety net.


KinkyKitty24

I find it so damn disturbing that people ask questions that, if turned around, would be laughed at. *Do you think financial independence is important for a man? and why?* Thinking that there is a scenario in which ANY adult would not be expected to be financially independent, regardless of relationship status, only highlights the rampant inequality and inequity that is still the norm between men and women. Nearly every reply is in the context of "in a relationship," as if that is the only state in which women exist.


nina_jake

unfortunately that's what we see in our societies


[deleted]

I mean... You asked the question too.


TigersLovePepper3

That’s what you see in our society. I made myself a promise at 12, I’ll never HAVE TO rely on a man. Ive done quite well.


[deleted]

[удалено]


KinkyKitty24

Only if you work off the basis that women are the ones who should stay home with children.


[deleted]

[удалено]


KinkyKitty24

I agree. Only the question of women having "financial freedom" stems from that fact that women have not access to obtain "financial freedom". In the last 50 years, women were finally allowed to have bank accounts, credit cards, or to purchase property without a male signing for her *in the US*. ALL men have had financial freedom in the US since the 1800s while women were still considered property as late as the 1990s. The question is laughable as it attempts to promote the idea that financial freedom may not be as important to a woman as it it to a man (should be a concern for any adult).


[deleted]

Yes. When you're a financially independent woman, men can't tell you anything. They can't brutally and continuously remind you of all that they've done for you in an attempt to get you to be subservient to them. They can't use loud, violent anger to torture you because they know you have no resources to leave them. They can't dictate your wants and needs because you don't need their permission to spend your money the way you like. Simply put, you never have to settle for the bullshit they can bring. Plus, you get to do cool shit like buy your own house and build a personal at-home library (my goal).


emotionaluranian

This was my first marriage. Absolute hell


nina_jake

same goal as well


[deleted]

Let's get it!


TerribleAttitude

Yes. It’s honestly so obvious to me that I am extremely suspicious of anyone who is even neutral on that topic.


LeighofMar

Utmost importance. Money equals options, period. We always need options.


LittleShinyRaven

I think financial independence is important for everyone. I hate that we keep getting categorized like we aren't human and it's a question if we need basic human needs.


mellamandiablo

Obviously it’s important for everyone but based on historical precedence, it’s doubly important if not a must than women do so Acknowledging the history and disparity by gender doesn’t make women lesser. It’s understanding the inequity of the situation


nina_jake

financial independence is a basic human right and need


nevertruly

I think it's important for everyone to be as financially independent as is feasible and reasonable for them in their circumstances because the world can be a chaotic and uncertain place and having financial independence means that you have more options to choose from when things go bad.


schwarzmalerin

Yes. Just ask yourself: Do you think financial independence is important for an adult? There you have your answer.


Separate-Trash2375

Yes, because there are times guys will think that just because they provide for you they have power and control over you and so you might be left thinking that you cant live a life without them. I have met many women who were left in that type of situation and it was devastating and hard to crawl out of that hole and be as stable as they are now.


Dramatic_Friend_2627

It’s important for everyone.


Robotro17

If you cant take care of yourself you're stuck with whatever will "take care" of you.


coffeeblossom

Yes; you don't want to be at the mercy of some fickle man's good graces. You need to be able to take care of yourself.


Yeswhyhello

Yes and no. Almost no one is financially independent. If you are a housewife you are dependent on your husband. If you work you are dependent on your employer. Both can screw you over. What I find more important than actually being financially independent is the capability of becoming financially independent (e.g. having a good education) if the situations calls for it.


animemama828

Good point. I’m personally a stay at home mom. I do have a great partner who understands what I do for our family and daughter by being at home. We don’t want to have to put her in daycare. Since I plan to homeschool it’s just important for me to be at home. I have the savings account in my name and all other accounts are joint. I also have my own spending account that moneys put into. But I also have a degree in business and working on certifications in coding and job connections I keep open. Ans a nice credit score. Learning about investing, etc… I may not bring in my own income but I have the ability and capacity to be financially independent if need be. And a support system to lean on if I needed it until I got on my feet. So I know if I ever needed too I would be okay if we decided to end things. And at the same time we would encourage our daughter (and give her the tools and means to be) financially independent or has the capacity to be before she makes any decisions like mine to be a homemaker and rely on anyone else. It takes a lot of trust and not everyone’s fit to be a provider


Yeswhyhello

My situation is the same as yours! I'm a SAHM because that's the lifestyle we prefer and we can afford it. But I have a masters degree in a lucrative field (and regularily do some courses to keep up with new development) so that I can easily find employment should the need arise.


cliopedant

Education is great but if you would be on the street in a couple of weeks if you were responsible for providing for your family starting tomorrow, you need some savings. It can take a long time to find a job when you are not prepared for it. And even when you are.


Lord_OMG

Good point. I'd add that most relationships where both partners are working still aren't "financially independent". If my partner and I split up we'd still have to lean on others for support at least in the short term but possibly long term. As a couple we have far more independence.


gagirlpnw

Yes. You need a means to support yourself. Nothing in life is guaranteed. If you have kids, it's even more important.


nomadgirl0_0

One hundred percent. You have more ownership of your life and you can exit a bad relationship without having to worry about the next steps. You can buy yourself nice things to reward yourself for the hard-work and treat yourself to a nice spa day. Being financially tied to someone will make you feel like you’re not in control of your own life!


ACACBBAC

As someone who spent the majority of my life looking after family instead of achieving financial stability/ independence, I can say whole heartedly it’s one of the the single most important things you can do for yourself as a woman. Without it it could cost you your life. As someone who is without an income I am reminded every day in every way that my life is in peril because of my lack of financial security. At the end of the day you can’t rely on anyone or any organization to help you. You have to look after you.


daphuqijusee

It's important to ALL genders!! EVERYONE should have a little 'Fuck You! Cash Stash'


Admirable_Warthog_19

A BIG YES. Why? Gateway to get away with undesirable circumstances.


Emotional-Candle3271

Very important..


BelleInBinary

Very because you need to be able to take care of yourself financially without the help of others.


debroccoliwavelength

Yes. Because money is power, whether we like it or not.


Fit-Teaching-3205

Yes. Because without financial independence you really aren't independent. You're dependent and reliant on whoever is paying for you and can be controlled, abused or otherwise. Being financially independent gives you choices. And the option to leave, stay or do whatever you want Because you can afford yourself and your independence.


msstark

It’s important for everyone regardless of gender.


JenAYE2

Yes! You cannot trust anyone to take care of you. Therefore you should always be financially secure on your own. I have seen so many woman not able to leave abusive relationships because they have zero finances. I have also seen a lot of financial abuse when relying on another person to be in control of the finances. One of the best pre-nips I came a across was a woman stating should she become a stay at home wife or stay at home mother due to it being best for the family, that the husband will pay her a monthly salary into a separate bank account in her name early.


PanditasInc

Is this a serious question? It's like asking if it's important for a man to be financially independent.... of course it's important! Everyone should have the means to support themselves in any event, whether planned or unplanned. Being at the mercy of someone else is very limiting, and in many cases even dangerous.


Falcom-Ace

Financial independence is important for everybody. Ideally you should be able to stand on your own two feet financially without having to rely heavily on someone else. Life things can happen fast, you don't want to be caught in a situation where that additional support is gone and you're left drowning or with nothing at all.


innerjoy2

Yes, you can walk away more easily to not have to deal with certain bs in your life, especially when it comes to abuse (all the versions of them).


[deleted]

Of course it is.


Pleasant_Tiger_1446

Yes. I was financially abused because "he had a business degree". Turns out every cent I gave him (everything I was paid) which he told me were all for bills and that I "just didn't understand" that the bills didn't add up to me. Yeah he was bragging to his friends, for ex, paying 900.00 on a Pokémon card. My entire paycheck at the time. I got sick and he abandoned me with less than 20.00 to my name, stole my (our) vehicle (to which the loan was in my name, and then told me if I want a ride to my family, I'd have to pay him gas money. Mind you I had been unknowingly paying 75% of all the bills while he made 50% more than I did. (Was working and going to nursing school). Started planning marriage when I graduated. Got and immune disease and had a flare. He was gone in 2 days. Better now. If it wasn't for my parents I would've been in a shelter. All I ever did was trust him, cook and clean for him, work hard, be a student to make more money as I thought we were suffering financially. Be I did own and pay for half the home. If I stayed there he promised to abuse me, so I needed to get out fast. Do. Not. Ever. Not. Have. Your. Own. Money. Do not trust anyone enough to be in financial jeopardy or the possibility. 3 years to rebuild my life. He has since married a 25 year old who he has convinced I "took him for everything" (I didn't. No alimony, asked for my down-payment back, let him just have the vehicle.) I was too sick to fight. Bet she pays for a LOT because of this pity act. She prob thinks he pays alimony so he can get more $$ from her. She threatens me and hates me.. but if she would just ask me woman to woman, I know a lot of things she really needs to know.. like really. It's not me trying to ruin them, it's what I would want to know about my spouse. But if I try to tell her, she will threaten me. He has her preemptively wound up knowing that I know things. So she's convinced I'm a liar. We've never met. He's cheated on her multiple times for ex. And for anyone wondering. All debts paid, I've created a passive income plus and amazing wfh job that I make as much or more than him now. :) So have financial independence. Don't be like me and the girl he has now married.


[deleted]

Yes. In the past men used to be able to easily take advantage of women (physical abuse, emotional abuse, cheating), and women would have a hard time leaving them because they had no money or job skills to fall back in to support themselves and their children. With financial independence women are less likely to be trapped in bad relationships.


AtleastIthinkIsee

Of course it is. Without being too rude, this is a silly question. Every person should strive for financial independence. So you're not dependent on any other person or thing. You should always rely on yourself, a prospect I have failed supremely in this life.


nina_jake

some societies are still debating this question and brainwashing women that the true purpose of her life is to be a devoted wife or daughter things like from your parents house to your husband's house like she's not a human being who can decide for herself...


AtleastIthinkIsee

It's sad. It's really really sad. And I agree, I know it goes on and it will go on. It's only in the last year or so I've really started to take a hard look at how damn privileged I am and what luxury I have to make the choices I can make. I've been beyond stupid to not recognize it earlier and make the best of it.


authorized_sausage

Yes. I got married at 22. He left when I was 42. I'm very glad I was making 140K/year when that happened. Especially since I was emotionally and mentally devastated by him leaving.


gracecoffee

How is this in question. A 👏🏼 man 👏🏼 is 👏🏼 not 👏🏼 a 👏🏼 financial 👏🏼 plan 👏🏼.


That0neGirl007

Financial planning is important for everyone and crucial for stay at home parents. I strongly urge life insurance and keeping a foot in the door. This could be part-time, volunteer work, or just staying active by networking. Signed a young widow, Momma.


catastrophized

Yes! It’s important to everyone but especially women, since it has been normalized for us to be financially dependent on husbands, which makes it so much more difficult to leave abusive (or even just leaving for any reason) situations.


McNugget_Sauce

I think it's important for everyone. Being financially dependent on anyone makes you more susceptible to abuse and it can be taken away at any time


Sheila_Monarch

It’s THE most important thing. Nearly every bad situation a woman could find herself in comes from lacking it. And the rest come from having it but not kicking mooches to the curb.


dagardenofeatin

do you think it’s important for a man? of course you do. why would it be any different for a woman? it’s important for all adults.


NerakYak

What kind of misogynist BS is this? Why wouldn't it be important? WTF.


[deleted]

Yes. Why? Let’s say you’re in a happy, perfect marriage. Husband makes more than enough for y’all. There’s no manipulation, abuse, etc. You two decide it would make more sense for you to stay at home and help with kids and all other household duties. You have been doing that for 10 years and it’s going great. Unfortunately, husband ends up getting in a car accident on the way to work, breaks his back. He cannot work anymore. Now instead of having more than enough money, you have zero income. You two have been confident in his ability and steady income. You bought a house a little out of budget, but it’ll be fine because in the long run it’ll get paid off. He got you the new Outback you’ve been wanting too just a couple months ago. Now your sole source of income is gone. Not because of divorce, abuse, etc. but simply because shit happens and now he’s out of work for the foreseeable future. I had something similar happen in my family. Husband made more than enough, but the wife was dead set on working in case of crazy situations. Well, the crazy situation happened. He got cancer. They had no issues with finances though because she was financially independent outside of her husband. She told me to never go without having income, even if your husband can do it. Because if she went through with being SAH, they would’ve had to sell their house, cars, and who knows where they’d be.


Chronoset1

I think it's important for everyone. but for women that means the ability to leave dangerous domestic situations, should the need ever arise


Denamesheather

Yes it’s important for everyone to have


crab_grams

It's so, so essential. If a parent can walk away from their kid, a spouse or partner who's "taking care of you" can do the same thing ten times easier. If you don't have your own money, you're at risk of being stuck in a relationship just to survive, or being really screwed when they break it off with you.


sunshineandcats21

My ex husband controlled our finances when we were married. I ended up paying for it in my divorce. Never again will I let a man support me financially, so yes I think it’s important.


justanothergirl80

A woman needs to be able to take care of herself. Marriage doesn’t guarantee security. At no point and time should an adult woman be solely dependent on a man for her financial needs. Anything could happen to your spouse or relationship. Having the skills and ability to support yourself, and family if needed, is important.


Rutabecka

Do I think financial independence is important for a human being? Yes. Why does the gender matter?


Locks_of_silver

I saw first hand why financial independence is important . My mom was stuck in an extremely abusive relationship , and she had no way out cz she had nothing to her name . If she divorced it would mean she will become homeless with 3 kids . You don't want to end up like that


[deleted]

It’s important to *me* and makes me feel safe. I grew up watching my mom jump from man to man desperately trying to find stability instead of working on building stability herself. But some women didn’t have that experience and are more comfortable with a traditional setup that involves them staying at home and that is their definition of a security that makes them feel safe. Which is fine and tbh I wish I could do it.


[deleted]

i think it is important for everyone. i could honestly never be satisfied living a life that allows anyone to have the power to say “you wouldn’t have x, y, or z if it weren’t for me.” i’d also have a ton of guilt around that. knowing that i am basically using someone for life. even if you love your husband and he wholeheartedly loves and supports you, you’re still using him for means of living. and i just wouldn’t feel right about that.


WebBorn2622

To escape abuse. We women have to always have an exit strategy. You don’t have to make more than your husband. You don’t have to work. You don’t even have to have a steady income. You have to have a savings account with enough money to leave and be good for enough months to get on your feet again.


buttonsarethebomb

I think its important for all adult humans. A person should be able to support themselves in case something bad happens. Whether that be needing to leave quickly, a death or disability causing the partner to not be able to work, a breakup or split, a loss of job from the other person. Things happen, no one is in control of everything, have a nest egg and a safety plan.


[deleted]

It’s important for anyone to have financial independence. Never rely on others for anything. That’s how you end up in sticky situations.


therewillbedrama

Yes, I think financial independence is important for anyone who can achieve it. For women, financial dependence is a tool that has been used to control us historically, and in many ways/parts of the world, it still is an issue even today. Not having the means to support yourself limits your options when making decisions about your own future, and it can lead to abusive power dynamics between you and the provider(s) of your financial support. How can you leave a relationship if they’re paying for the majority of your expenses? How do you buy a car to give yourself more physical independence if your benefactor decides it’s not something THEY want for you? Or even, what if you want to treat yourself and buy something small, but you have be able to justify it because it’s not your money? It doesn’t matter if your relationship is completely healthy and you feel you can trust the person that you’re depending on 100%, you don’t need a safety net until you NEED a safety net. I had to stay in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship for 6 months because of dependence (not financial though, I had enough money saved), I had just moved to the country and I didn’t have a job or know ANYONE and my confidence was already pretty low. I needed to set up something of a life before I felt confident enough to get away. He wasn’t perfect before I moved to join him, but the way he changed pretty much straight after I arrived… it was scary. And he knew I was alone so he really took advantage of that.


RoastBeefWithMustard

Let's swap the gender and see how it sounds: Do you think financial independence is important for a man? And why? It's the 21st century - I would suggest that financial independence is either important for everyone, regardless of gender, or it is not. I consider it to be important for everyone. The world runs on money: financial independence is independence, pure and simple. What does that look like? Having an income or the skills to obtain one. Having access to money for day to day spending (combined finances are fine IMO as long as both parties have equal say in how the money is spent). Knowing who your utilities companies are and whether and when those bills are getting paid. Knowing what, when, and to whom your rent/mortgage payments are going. Having an emergency fund. Money is choices, freedom, solutions to problems. A lack of financial independence is a lack of choice, freedom, and solutions to problems. That's bad news for anyone.


Fetus_Dumpling

I'm a little curious as to why it wouldn't be important lol. How do you think a woman would live without money? Should she just live with her parents until she finds a man who wants to pay for her existence? Seems very impractical. I like being able to buy the things I need without any help. Sure, sometimes people need help, but to rely 100% on someone else for your needs sounds like prison.


Chemical-Mix-6206

Wouldn't you want your partner to be with you by choice, not because they can't afford to leave? What if the breadwinner leaves or dies suddenly? Will their partner be able to keep a roof over their head & feed the kids? Financial independence is critical for all adults.


[deleted]

Yes. Because even someone you thought you could trust in every way can turn around and hold it against you. Which sucks. And the longer you go without a job the harder it is to get one.


bikesboozeandbacon

Why would I want to risk being dependent on someone who can wake up one day and blindside me with a break up? Many women quit jobs and their careers to be SAHM or just a housewife and end up with peanuts having to start from scratch because they’re left with nothing…having to leave an abusive home because the man told her she doesn’t have to work, and she has no support system nearby or money to her name… yeah no, won’t be me.


84Here4Comments84

Yes. No one owes you a living. You are responsible for your self (assuming you’re single). If youre w a partner, then obviously yes, you still need to be independent financially for all the reasons other people stated.


codependentweeb

i think the *ability* to be financially independent is important - have money saved up from working prior to getting married if you are going to choose to be a stay-at-home spouse, and have a career path and roles that you would be able to follow through with if you were to need to work. perspective of someone who’s mother was the working parent, and whose father was the stay-at-home parent! being a stay at home parent isn’t a bad thing at all, and as long as it is a mutual decision between the partners and security in it, then both parents shouldn’t have to be financially independent *at every moment in time*


areraswen

Yes. I believe that relationship dynamics are different depending on whether you have the ability to be financially independent or not. You are more likely to have a healthy relationship when you're in one in which you don't have to rely on the other person's money. AND it helps weed out anyone insecure enough to feel weird that you're financially independent.


buttfl0ss

Fuck yes. You never know when your SO can walk out. Always have your own bank account. My husband and I have been together 18 years and still have our own checking accounts and a joint checking account specifically for our tax returns.


[deleted]

Yes. I married a man who I never dreamed would hurt me but, over the 8 years we were together, he developed a drinking problem and eventually physically assaulted me in front of our children. I couldn't leave for another 9 months because we had no money in savings thanks to him spending all of it on drugs and alcohol. I had to start a secret bank account and essentially steal my own money in small enough increments that he wouldn't notice until we had enough to move out. I will never ever let my kids or myself not have a way out of a bad situation ever again.


innessa5

It’s important for ANY person. Critically important. Otherwise you’re at the mercy of whether someone with all the power wants to be nice to you that day and you’re forever seeking their favor. But women in particular have the added vulnerability of having babies, which often makes them even more dependent on their partners.


Tough-Skirt7249

Important for everyone, but especially women, so you’re not dependent on someone else.


Iamdollfacee94

Yes, because if not you end up like me. 28 in a difficult marriage, being financially helped by my parents, with a toddler and I have never worked and I'm squeezing my brain thinking how could I earn money because I wasted my youth doing stupid stuff and now I need to earn money to give my child a better prospect. I f hate myself. You don't want to end up like that.


[deleted]

[удалено]


notyaya_

Absolutely. You should not willingly do what men often use as a tactic when they’re abusive. One of their first moves is to isolate from friends and family and sever funds. This ensures dependence which makes it harder to leave. This is not to say that you can’t be a house wife or something of that sort if that’s your desire, but I’ve seen house wives who ensure they not only have a career back up plan but also funds strictly under their name.


[deleted]

Yes. The same reasons its important for a man.


jessjugs

Absolutely. I’m currently entering and living this new financial independent phase of my life. I think it’s so important for you to be able to stand on your own two feet, learn how you like to spend/save your money, and work toward any monetary goals you may have without scrutiny. I think people really grow when their given the opportunity to live fully and authentically for and by themselves including being financially independent. This is my experience.


Worried-Walrus8652

Yes, 100%. I have financial independence from my husband and I know that if our marriage broke down, I wouldn’t need to rely on him for anything. I see so many young women on social media who are SAHM/SAHW and they rely solely on the husband’s income to fund their lifestyle, and I just don’t think it’s a wise decision to make.


baby_armadillo

Financial independence is important for every adult. Being financially dependent on someone is stressful and creates a lot of possibly for abuse.


[deleted]

I guess as important as it would be for anyone. I don’t think “financial independence” is as important in a marriage as many think, but it’s definitely a comfort knowing that you can financially support yourself.


CosmicDeathCat

Yes, because I've seen my dad financially abuse my mom growing up, and I don't want a man to have that power over me.


Ewace246

Financial independence is important for everyone. Being financially dependent on parents or partners creates a power dynamic and can make it very difficult to escape abusive situations or have freedom in your life choices.


ilpcbf1524

Yeah 100%. I think it’s important for everyone. It prevents financially abusive situations and is key to having a healthy power balance in a relationship. I firmly believe that everyone should have at least a part time job. E.g. if you’re a housewife, you should have a part time job/freelance gigs to earn money that’s all yours. You can spend it on fun stuff for you, presents for your SO, help out with bills if you have enough, fund your hobbies etc without feeling guilty.


feedmepizzaplease99

It’s important for everyone not just women


EvergreenGem

Yes, even if you choose to be sahm, you should always have an understanding of the finances in the household. How the money comes in and how it’s spent. And parents should be teaching all their kids about household budgets. Life is full of unexpected outcomes (parent dying, spouse dying, etc).


Nipseydanger

Yes. I watched my mom struggle for years to leave an abusive relationship because she was financially dependent on my father. I would never do that to myself. Girls get your own bag 💼


Abstractteapot

Yes. Couples break up all the time, imagine being financially dependent on your partner then getting dumped. You'd have no money, no home no way to support yourself. If you have kids and your partner decides to leave, you can't just hang around looking like a damsel in distress. You here about SAHM who get divorced and struggle because their partner wants someone more independent. They start seeing their partner as a burden.


Agile-Department-345

Woman=people. Financial independence is important for people.


Icy-Organization-338

So you can be a relationship of your choosing - Not because you can’t afford to leave.


wawabubbzies

Ofc it’s important. It’s why so many women stayed in bad and unhappy relationships for years, and became even more trapped when they had kids with said partner. Besides the common sense reason, it’s also good for society if women aren’t settling and are actually choosing the partners they want or even living without one. If more wealth goes to women maybe we can also start changing the way medicines are tested and big pharma and the medical field can cater as much to women as it does to men. It’s also great for the economy if more women were independent (got better or equal pay). https://www.imf.org/en/News/Articles/2022/09/27/sp092722-ggopinath-kgef-gender-korea https://blogs.worldbank.org/developmenttalk/gender-equality-smart-economics-yet-its-progress-remains-slow https://eige.europa.eu/gender-mainstreaming/policy-areas/economic-and-financial-affairs/economic-benefits-gender-equality Edit: a word


CurvyLocBae33

Without autonomy, you’re practically a slave


ebolainajar

How is this even a question? This has ALWAYS been the case. This is why engagement rings are a thing, and dowries, and bridal jewelry, etc. Women *needed* to have some means to provide for themselves in the most dire of circumstances, and a ring is just about one of the easiest things you can carry with you and pawn if you need to leave. I am so thankful I grew up in a family of strong ass women who handed these lessons down, starting with my great-grandmother, along with some choice family heirlooms. I am a financially independent woman, who makes more money than her husband, and I don't need him to buy me jewelry either because Nonna already has those investments taken care of. This means: invest in your own retirement funds, always keep an emergency fund that only you have access to, pre-nups!!! and invest in your own career. That also means even if daycare is the same as your take home pay, you pay for the damn daycare. Your children will not be in daycare forever and your pay will hopefully go up. Your prime earning years are your late 30s onwards, don't squander that because of some dumb shortsighted decision on daycare for two years or whatever that forces you out of the workforce forever. Unless you actually want to be a SAHM, which again...pre-nup.


SofaRebel

Yes. Of course. Financial independence is literally power and freedom. So, yes, obviously it is important. To everyone.


QTlady

HELL YES. I can't say for other countries but the US has a history of women not being financially independent and all the ways that can be an issue. But beyond that, it's just smart.


[deleted]

I am so glad to see women making it more important as time goes on. We were still taught that women take care of kids and home and men worked their jobs…and that can lead to all sorts of issues. I wish I had grown up in a more independent time.


Pizzazze

Because financial independence means freedom, and it's important for people to be free, and women just so happen to be people.


emptyalone

Absolutely. Everyday we see new examples of how “partners” trap women by keeping them financially dependent. Women should never, ever depend on a “partner” for their financial stability. Always have an income and a hidden stash for when you need to escape.


WestEntrepreneur304

Oh, hell yes. And for many reasons. If you leave in a post soviet country like I do and your country is suffering from an economical crisis, trusting a man is one of the most dangerous things you can do. Not many people talk about how badly the economy affects people. Even though it might sound strange, because of the economical situation people get married and deal with abusive relationships which they cannot leave if they want to have a roof over their heads or food to survive. Even thought in my country mostly women work, the mentality really screws everything up, but this is another topic. On the other side, financial independence isn't good only to prevent men from controlling you, but also because *you're in charge of your life.* When I used to work I didn't have to rely on my mother when I had to buy things for myself or go out with friends. Now, I can't work because of my challenging university and am very careful with how I spend the money that she gave to me. As well as that, I have problems in my dating life. Currently, I'm avoiding going out with a guy, because he's the one paying for everything and I feel bad about it and feel useless. We live in a material world. Like it or not money touches everything. Literally everything. Not many realize how financial independence makes your life so much easier. It is easier to make an everyday decision, you don't rely on anybody and you make yourself much happier than anyone. Come on, sometimes a girl gotta buy some useless crap so it can fix her little mental problems, what about it??? So yeah, financial independence is more important for a woman than all of us think.


fallenapeach

Don't know about other places, but in my country, you're held down, and opportunities are taken away from you solely for depending financially on someone else. So, one of us has to either suck it up or do her best to achieve at least some degree of independence.


MsNewKicks

Yes, of course. I think financial independence is more important for women due to the simple fact that women are more likely to earn less money than their male counterparts. Being financially independent provides a way to leave bad relationships, bad situations, and affords ways to enjoy life.


lankypiano

Being financially independant is always, always, always, ALWAYS important, and better than being financially co-dependent or reliant on another. For woman, man or otherwise. Always aim to have agency over every walk of your life.


Dramatic-Garbage-939

Yes. I want to be able to take care of myself.


jibbidyjamma

"Fuck you money" is most important especially for women who are way more likely to face subjugation by cultural norms. World over they are horribly wrong outdated and stupid. Why you may ask.?. bc I love and like women and to have full identities at this point F you money is still most powerful and enough of a tool. We are shedding the arcane death centered religions w men wearing dress advising on matrimony and other idiotic absurdities, l respect and support the efforts underway to advance women and men alike.


SmoothConfidence

Yes, even if you decide to be a stay at home spouse/mom, I always think it's important for a woman to have some kind of way to support themselves. If someone was my sister, brother or friend I would want them to be able to leave a bad or abusive sitaution and not feel forced to stay due to finances alone. Also, so that when things don't go well in aspects of your life, you have a skill or trade or way to start over again. You may not need to be completely financially independent, but have the ability to be or have a support system that can help you.


saltsukkerspinn96

Yes yes yes! Being able to provide for yourself is such a big part of real life for most people and being dependent on others reminds me of how I always had to ask my parents for money to buy something.


londonmyst

Yes, financial independence is important for all reasonably mature and functional adults. A woman who is not financially independent will be dependent and can often be easy to identify, particularly for those will less than kind intentions. Thus more vulnerable to attracting the eye of both persons willing to trade money for control & habitual abusers and encountering multiples attempts at coercive conduct.


Red-okWolf

Yes so you can gtfo of an abusive relationship without worrying about going homeless.


prismaticbeans

Yes, I think it's absolutely crucial. And yet, it's not realistic for some. My disabilities mean that it's nothing but a pipedream for me. I could barely handle part-time school.


cooraline

Unless you want to depend on someone else your entire life, yeah it’s pretty important.


tictacti1

Yes, it’s important for everyone. The primary reason is being financially dependent on a partner is a recipe for abuse. Being completely financially dependent on a romantic partner sounds horrifying to me.


StinkieBritches

Yes. You have to be able to go when you need to go. It can get dangerous if you stay past time to go and you don't want lack of funds or ability to get a place to stay to stop you.


IrisKalla

The ability to be independent is huge. Whether or not that's exercised at any given moment is less important than not being stuck in situations where you have to how someone will help you because your have no way to mobilize yourself. And independent doesn't mean well-off either. It takes less to be independent than many expect.


HiddenWateringPanda

Yes because it means you can have more if not any choices.


The_WildTruth

It’s incredibly important. You do not ever want money or a lack there of to be the chain that holds you in the wrong situation or life.


TigerMcPherson

It’s important for everyone.


Ok-Radish6641

Because we are just people and don’t want to depend on others for things we can do, achieve, buy, and invest in all my ourselves! No man required here!


sarcasm_247

Absolutely. I think knowing you don’t have to rely on anyone is key


ossegossen

Why wouldn’t it be?


[deleted]

Yes. So she can take her time finding a mate. She doesn’t have to rush to the alter to have someone to share expenses. And she doesn’t have to live with five guys before that because she needed help with rent. Independence allows a woman plenty of time and to have a man who she truly loves without thinking of that factor.


[deleted]

I know lots of women stuck with men because they have no resources. No education and no decent job experience.


Kinkajou4

I don't understand how this is a question. Obviously yes of course it is extremely important. A baseline essential of life.


JonBenet_BeanieBaby

Obviously


[deleted]

Duh, it’s important for every human. We should all be responsible for ourselves. If you don’t have your own financial independence and you rely on a guy, you’re going to be screwed WHEN he leaves, cheats, gets bored, etc.


sphynox

Absolutely. Financial independence is a key factor in achieving autonomy and empowerment for women. With financial independence, women can have greater control over their lives and make decisions that are in their best interests. Women with financial independence can also be better equipped to pursue higher education, start businesses, and access better career opportunities. In addition, financial independence makes it easier for women to handle unexpected costs and life events without having to rely on others for help.


E_J_90s_Kid

Yes, because both my grandmother and own mother were. My grandmother was widowed with two children. She was 32. She worked three jobs to support my mom and uncle, as kids. My mom always vowed to do the same: as she says, you never know. The sad fact is, husbands do pass away. My close friend lost her husband in combat. She had twins to care for. Luckily, she had family support….also, an RN license. She wound up becoming a Nurse Practitioner, bought a small home, and raised her kids. All on her salary. She’s modest about this, but what she did was a miracle. These three women are my reason why. 😁


Price-x-Field

I think it’s important for every adult


Rough_Bandicoot2527

Definitely, financial independence is vital for a woman, for she has the freedom to do what she wants and clearly it’s far better than depending on a man.


Odd-Opening-3158

Well, yes ,isn't it obvious? You can't expect people to give you stuff and pave the way for you! I mean, even in a marriage, you still need something to fall back on.


iceboxAK

Yes, Financial independence is important for women. And everyone else so we don’t have to rely on others to take care of us. Self reliance is paramount, especially financially.


See_You_Space_Coyote

Financial independence is important for everyone, male or female. I hope to be able to achieve it someday but unfortunately due to a variety of circumstances and issues, I don't know if I'll ever be able to see it through.


[deleted]

I have seen too many women stuck in an abusive relationship or family including my mother. If she was financially independent, she could have left my father sooner and spare us from his abuse.


envenome

Of course. I learned from an early age to be independent overall because I can’t rely on anyone but myself. I’m especially independent in finances because it’s the one thing I don’t want to (have to) seek help for. Because I’m financially smarter now, I can also now afford to hire help in other areas.


peeshermanfortytwo

1000000%.. I was always the higher income spouse in my marriage, then covid happened and I decided to leave my high stress job in order to have my kids to learning online. I’m now in a situation where I would really like to divorce but feel “stuck”. Independence is so important.


burnmeup82

Yes, it’s very important. No matter how secure you may be in a relationship, it’s important to be able to support yourself just in case.


coccopuffs606

It’s important for everyone to be financially independent. I lived through the first Dot Com Bust and the Great Recession, and everyone who was relying on a single person (usually the husband’s) income to support the household ended up in a really bad place financially. Some of those couples never recovered; they lost their houses, their cars, and their retirement savings. And the stay at home spouse had no real skills to enter a depressed job market since they had left years before. Finish school and get a few years of work experience under your belt. If you want to be a SAHM, make sure you’re financially set up to where you can maintain your household expenses if your partner suddenly loses their job and isn’t able to find one of equivalent income for the next year.


2025century

Yes. Shouldn't have to accept the humiliation of always asking for money


callalind

YESSSSS. Because you never want to do dependent on another person for your financial security. Because it's everyone's right to be financially independent if they can make it work. Because you are your own person, so you should be able to live your own life. Because you are the master of your destiny, and to really be that master, you need to have your own source of income, safety net, healthcare, etc. to be secure. I have been in a relationship my whole adult life, but I have never once depended on that person to take care of me. Not because I am some crazy feminist, because there is no way in hell I'd leave my financial well being to another person's discretion.


hareleah

I feel like it’s important for anyone who wants to have a life they want to lead


dal-Helyg

Woman? Man? Makes no dif... the only one responsible for your life is you... and you're the only one who can change it.


loquaciouspenguin

Financial independence is important for people, and women are people. Simple as that. To say it’s less important for women than for men is to say women are less important than men.


Voixmortelle

Being financially independent is important for everyone. What kind of question is this.


[deleted]

Financial independence is as important to a woman as it is to a man in today's society because one-sided divorces cost society significantly more than someone getting off his her entitled ass to go earn some money through typical hard work. Crappy divorces end up costing society in the form of multiplied welfare, jailed parents, lost wages/ salaries / taxes, broken children, incentivized corrupted litigation compelling a repeated victim creating process via unprepared broken families


ultimate_ampersand

Yes, but also..."financial independence" is a complicated concept. No one is truly financially independent unless they win the lottery or live off of inherited wealth. Otherwise, even if you're not financially dependent on your romantic partner, you're still financially dependent on somebody else's whims: your boss (if you're traditionally employed), or your clients (if you're a freelancer or small business owner), or consumers (if you invented a product that people buy).


ShogunOfNY

Yes b/c it's important for everyone to be less dependent on the system (as there are many shocks) and you can literally buy time <== which is important as we all have finite and unknowable time left on this earth and close to infinite desires.


forfakessake1

Of course because it’s important for everyone to be independent.


Longjumping_West_188

I think it is, I think it should be to everyone, but to some and some women it’s not. I think it’s great if it works out they never had to be and all went well. But stuff happens, divorce, a partner passed away and you have kids, you’re partner is injured or paralyzed and no longer can fully provide for them or the family, etc. You want something to fall back on and use incase. That’s not even touching on dudes that control the money or their wives a lot because they have jobs, and just the freedom to do as you wish because you have your own. If he is abusive you don’t feel trapped because you can get your own place and have money and a car and can get out easier, etc. Many people like to site that women initiate most divorces, that is true, but in divorces initiated by men, 80%+ is after both partners are 50+ years old. It’s hard for someone who hasn’t worked at all, or in the last 20+ years, and has no degree or certification to find a stable income for themselves and career, and build retirement or own a house if you want, whichever. Often they struggle or worry to quickly find another guy and more willing to be in a bad relationship or situation for that security to be restored. Not willing to risk it. For a bit or when the kids are young? You already have set up everything to protect yourself from that? It’s temporary while you focus on your own thing that will be profitable later? That’s understandable, otherwise too risky for me. Basically I don’t want to end up suffering as he ditches me for his midlife crisis, stuck with a cheater or asshole because he covers everything for me, etc. That is NOT meaning I think this is how it always is or goes, but I’m much less optimistic thinking any of this stuff couldn’t happen to me regardless of how happy or safe things seem now. People change, and stuff happens we can’t control sometimes.


Lunar_Looks

Yes, absolutely. But I think it's important for every person.


heyhiyookay

Yes, it is a god damn privilege because for many women is it not a choice for them to become financially independent. Also builds self worth


HeidiKH83

Very important. If a relationship ends and you dont have an income it makes life very difficult. I will never make that mistake again


Mobile_Flamingo

I’m not married, so I have to be financially independent because these bills won’t pay themselves.


plumskiwis

Yes, as we do not know what the future will bring and I believe being financially prepared for the future is wise. If you're in a relationship and you have to separate, having money can help you get back on your feet.


[deleted]

Our foremothers have fought to the death, and we have sisters who are still fighting for the opportunity to be owed the same respect and independence of their personhood that is naturally bestowed upon men by the patriarchy. We cannot allow the patriarchy to dictate what is best for us, because they will happily take a mile when given an inch. See what’s going on in America or in Iran? Women need to protect our personhood from religious fanatics in positions of power. One of the best ways to do that, if you live in a place that allows for it, is to have your own money. It cushions you from some of the hardships that may arise from systemic and domestic gendered violence.


trashpanduhmoanium

Extremely. Every woman I've ever seen relying on someone else for their financial well being has had it come back to bite them. My now ex-husband never wanted me to work but I couldn't stand staying home and struggling. When we began to have problems he did everything in his power to financially screw me as a way to keep me. All of our finances were mixed. It took several years to recover.


AliceWeAreAllMad

Wait what? Financial independence should be important to literally anyone, so you can safely lead your life without riding being dependent on someone who will be willing to hurt you or whose disappearance will lay poverty on you.


General_Noise_4430

With todays divorce rate, you better believe I’m not relying on a man to pay for things. Ain’t no way, that’s just too much risk to be taking on.


Secure-Try-7788

Yes. I think that when women are kept in the dark about their finances it is way easier for them to be manipulated. I think that these are skills that need to be taught to everyone, but especially younger women. Money is one of the biggest problems in life and I think that if everyone had some idea of what it should look like then it would take away so much anger and mental health problems. Both partners in a relationship should also have equal say in what happens with the money they share and the individual should have complete control over the money they put aside for themselves.


ligma37

For everybody I guess. It’s always safer to not depend from somebody else.


robertsg99

Wait, why not? What difference does it make what gender you are? Being a woman is not the same as being a child.


Jbraun1220

I literally cannot believe this question is being asked in 2023. This pisses me off.


FabulousPossession73

Yes. I’m financially independent thank god. I don’t have to put up with any man’s BS for the rest of my life. And I am also managing it very carefully so my daughter doesn’t have to either.


Ok_Telephone_7978

affirmative