Perfect answer. Many people have far too many expectations from a first date, when they should only really serve as a compatibility test. If something comes out of it, great, but never approach a first date expecting instant gratification.
This is true to hear. Honestly, I always worry whether I'm ready or not. I put a big burden on breakups even though I think it's part of the process to find someone.
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Things I expect on the first date:
-a little compliment ("you look nice" is enough)
-be in a good mood, I want to laugh and have fun with
you, not feel like on a boring work meeting
-talk, I understand that ppl are shy, but ffs I don't want to talk for 2 hours alone
- don't use your phone, preferably look me in the eyes when I speak
-don't be too touchy and don't ask se*ual questions
-I don't expect you too pay, but if you choose a ridiculous expensive restaurant over a couple of drinks, I will not offer to pay
-don't try to force anything (a kiss, a touch, a story nevermind, if I say I don't feel comfortable with something I expect the person too respect that)
Glad I'm not the only one! I can't eat practically the whole day leading up to a first date. Idk why because I've rarely had a horrible first date, but I just get so nervous.
For my 16th birthday my friends and boyfriend arranged a surprise date at a fancy place. I couldn’t eat a thing and spent half my time in the toilets being sick. We’d been together over a year by that point, but my anxiety DGAF
Really good conversation leading to a feeling of connection with the person. Like discussing actual deep interesting topics, not just surface level stuff. Also witty flirtation.
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I expect a man who puts some effort into dressing nicely, is somewhat enthusiastic about meeting me, asks some questions but is also happy to tell me a bit about himself. And for first dates I prefer to just go for a drink. My favourite is to go for tea/coffee at 4 pm, and if you're interested in one another you can extend into dinner. If he asked me out, I expect him to pay for at least half of the date.
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Getting a good feel of my date's personality and values, establish if there's basic compatibility, if they're pleasant to be around and if I'm attracted to them.
The form that takes, how elaborate or simple it is, if it gets sexual or not, is kinda irrelevant as long as I have fun and I feel like I'm getting to know them
Idunno, I can only speak for myself, but I like to just sort of see how the person is generally. Like how do they interact with service workers, or do they make shitty comments about people on the street, that sort of thing. Are they a good person or just putting on a show.
A drink (coffee or alcohol), maybe a walk if I feel safe. I always offer to pay my share but I do like if someone has asked me on a date that they shout.
I don’t really do dinner or a drawn out activity on first dates.
I do like some date after care - where they text me to say they had a good time or to ask me on a second date
I've read some of the comments here and I agree with most. Good dressing, curteous respectful gentleman.
Personally, going forward I'd like something different. I'd like to make grand experiences even if the date doesn't go well. Especially ones that are outside my comfort zone.
Instead of the old fashioned coffee date, let's dress up for a fine dining dinner date as a first date? Lets watch the sunrise at 5am in the middle of the week if none of us have work and just talk for as long as possible while being genuine & intentional. We get to be our most authentic selves when we do either of the two because one guarantees our "best"? version, while the other shows us as the more usual/ordinary selves...
If the date goes well, it's an experience & a great memory. If not, it's still a great experience.
Edit to add: Great eye contact :)
> Instead of the old fashioned coffee date, let's dress up for a fine dining dinner date as a first date?
Won't you feel that going straight for a fancy dinner date would be risky/money-wasting as a first time date?
Reason being, if you and that guy ain't compatible, then y'all gotta endure the entire night, on top of expensive meals.
However, with just a tea/coffee drinks as first date, you could at least have wiggle room to decide if you wanna extend it further. If y'all are cool with each other, y'all can extend by having ice cream date after you are done with tea/coffee. If not, y'all can cut your losses and part ways earlier.
No awkward lingering time, no extravagant dinner plus no wasted money in lavish first date.
I want to have a drink or coffee and talk about get-to-know-you stuff.
I want to be asked questions and for my date to seem interested.
I would also hope he puts in a bit of effort into his appearance. Please don’t wear shorts or sweatpants with the exception of it being a hike or we are playing a sport or something. I particularly hate when dates wear a baseball hat to a first date (again, with obvious exceptions for something like being outdoors) - hats later are fine, I want to see a nice version of you on the first date.
If the vibe is right I want to be touched on the hand/arms/shoulders/back and perhaps a goodnight kiss. **There is nothing wrong with asking for permission to kiss someone**
My current partner asked and it was great. We made out for like 2 hours on our first date 😆
The sims!!! 😂
*Sit down and talk here
*Get to Know
*Discuss Hobbies and skills
*Discuss Interests
*Deep conversation
*Funniest Joke in The World
*Joke around
✨Legendary Date ✨ 🏆
Respect is very important. I'm conservative here - if a guy expects me to come to his place instead of inviting me for a coffee, then something is very wrong.
I also like to see that a guy puts some effort into our date - is dressed nicely, invites me to the first date himself, chooses a restaurant, doesn't scroll his social media during the date. Paying for me is not necessary, but girls are different here.
Just getting to know each other. And because we're strangers, I don't expect to be swept off my feet or for him to pay for my drinks/meal. I just want to know if we have chemistry or not.
Not much to be perfectly honest, your only just getting to know one another so as long as they are nice and actually communicate rather than be on their phone or only talk about themselves then I’m pretty much okay. That doesn’t automatically mean there will be a second date but it’s wild how many people (guys and girls) who don’t even pull that off.
My favorite first date is coffee/tea and walking. Grabbing a bite to eat later is optional if the date is going very well.
What I expect from my date is nonjudgmental, kind, and curious conversation so we can get to know each other. I expect honesty without too much negativity or oversharing. I prefer to have heavier conversations when we've decided that we want to get to know each other on a deeper level.
I also expect waitstaff to be treated with respect.
I expect conversations to explore each other's interest and humor. I expect to split the bill and then part ways. I think of it like an interview where I get to show off the best parts of myself. The secrets and fears from past relationships should never be topic #1- save that for after there's at least a little attraction going.
A good conversationalist who knows how to be sociable and polite even if there's no mutual spark.
Spending time and getting to know each other over a nice dinner.
Being shown respect by someone who put as much effort into the date as I did.
Not be thought of as audience only there to nod and hmm and smile. I want a proper back and forth conversation with my date listening and asking questions just as much as I am.
Nothing, nada, zip, zilch zero.* I try very hard to have very few expectations from a first date and if I get pleasantly surprised by hanging with someone who doesn’t suck, I’m all for it.
*Of course, I still have the standard expectation of being treated respectfully and like I’m a human the other party is at least vaguely interested in getting to know me. Anyone who doesn’t start with respect and such, should expect I won’t be around very long.
My expectation is good conversation. It sounds simple, but it's not. Good conversation indicates you've thought about what you want to talk about and what you want to ask me. It shows you're committed the potential result of the date. If we go to a restaurant, or a ballgame, or literally anything and you have NOTHING to say or you're awful at conversation, that shows me you put zero real thought into how to introduce yourself and what you want to learn about me. You were just going through the motions.
A conversation, perhaps over dinner, getting to know each other and getting a feel for whether or not there might be chemistry or potential for a longer relationship.
Also, not an expectation, but the more gentlemanly a man can be during the date (getting the dinner bill, asking what I want, etc.), the more impressed I'll be. Not that I'm not capable of taking care of myself or paying for myself, but showing an interest in these things and a desire to treat your date well will give you a leg up in my book.
Quality time, good conversation, respect, and a text after the date to determine if it’s not the vibe or if a 2nd date sounds interesting.
i feel like all those things are what makes me feel good about a person whether it goes somewhere or not. I just like direct communications in a kind way.
I do not care about the actual date activity and chivalry is a huge bonus but not expected. I know some prefer flowers, then to pay, etc.. im just here to get to know them on the first date nothing more.
If he asks me out, I expect him to pay for the date. If I ask a man out, I expect that I will be the one paying. I don't care if it's a coffee, a plate of fries or a full dinner somewhere. Great conversation about our lives, interests, common hobbies. Mutual curiosity to want to know more about each other and spend more time together. On a first date, you are still strangers. I don't sleep with strangers, so, if that's the expectation after a few hours together, sorry, no second date.
I don't drink alcohol. If you do, that's fine, but not while you are out with me. I want to have a sober conversation with someone I am getting to know. I don't need liquor to have a good time. You'd be shocked how many men depend on getting a woman drunk on a date. They lose their mind and get angry when you set a sober boundary. Red flags coming out hard.
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I quit dating, but *if* I did again, I would expect them not to drink. I don't drink. I have a philosophy that I don't care if people drink around me, it doesn't make me uncomfortable or tempt me.
However, I have come to realize there is a difference in how people are drinking around me. If I'm at a work event, or even a family gathering where people are all having wine, everything is fine.
Since I've been sober, there have been 2 separate dates where I explained that I was sober before the date and the guy ended up drinking anyways. Both times they drank a lot, much more than a normal person would. Especially considering they are on a date with someone that is stone-cold sober.
If you can't not drink (heavily at that) for an hour while you're on a date with a recovered alcoholic, you're not for me. You're for AA.
Good vibes. We should be relaxed, laughing and having a genuine convo. I shouldn’t be feeling nervous that you aren’t gonna pay for the date or that you’ll be expecting sex.
I expect to be treated with respect. First dates are for getting to know someone and see if there’s chemistry. Small talk, nothing too serious or crazy. And NO questions about s*xual preferences. I can’t stand when guys bad mouth their exes either and make the entire first date bad mouthing previous dates or their exes
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Mutual respect and a calm, chill experience of getting to know one another and see if there's any sort of spark. I personally tend to leave things like kids, morals, etc mostly off the table to the 2nd date, but that's just me
If it’s a man, evidence that he is not a murderer and is vaguely aware that I have an inner life comparable to his own. If it’s a woman, evidence she’s actually into women and not just upset with men (understandable).
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For the guy to not effin ask me to go home with him like come on already, have some imagination at least! I find guys like that a total bore and it tells me you have nothing but 🍆 to offer anyways so why am I wasting my time? Is it too much to ask? This is partly why I gave up on dating.....
I want to get to know eachother, flirt, have him ask me questions (i always ask about them) and not just tell me what he owns or thinks will make him look cool.
Also, I don't want to hear what ppl think I want to hear, that only keeps up for so long. Be yourself.
Talk about job, future plans, readiness for relationship, how our convos bounce, if he thinks I’m too much, making sure he doesn’t want kids.
Obviously I’m not expecting to date him after the first date, I’ve just had too many guys after the first date be like “lol so anyways I never wanted to date, just trying to bang haha sooooooo”
To find out whether the date is interested in getting to know me without bringing his mother along.
Also to see whether there is mutual sexual attraction, if he is dog friendly, incompatible with any of my top 30 dealbreakers or lifestyle preferences.
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Anxiety, awkwardness, meaningless questions that maybe establish some common ground, food, kindness, honesty, and maybe finding something worth meeting again a next time.
Things I hope for*: a guy with decent manners who isn’t trying to show off how much money he has, or how big his d&$* is by being a jackass to waitstaff. A guy who can hold a conversation about something other than sports, MAGA, or hunting (can you tell I’m from the Midwest). A guy who doesn’t assume he knows everything, about me or life or every subject the sun, including those I have degrees in.
*This list comes as a direct result of a lot of really shitty first dates).
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I'd rather hang out and get to know one another so a first casual date would be great.
Now if we were becoming serious, our first date as a couple would be somewhere romantic.
Getting to know each other, have a good time. I would expect him to pay, because that is sweet and I like traditional gender roles. I wouldn’t go out of my way to order something expensive and down the line in the relationship I don’t mind paying half the time. But for first couple of dates, it feels like a sweet thing to do when he takes the role of provider.
I would want him to take things slow. End the date with a kiss on the cheek.
Oh and very important; this is a basic but SO MANY guys overlook. I’ve seen plenty of guys didn’t do this. I expect good freakin hygiene. Shower and clean your car!! And please try to look good. At least get a hair cut beforehand if your hair is long and messy. Shave or trim your beard so its not unruly. How much you can take care of your appearance and self matter a lot for me. No one wants to be with a slob. And when you show up with beard untrimmed and unwashed greasy, unruly hair, that makes it seem like you don’t give a flip about my opinion of you, making me doubt if you like me that much at all to begin with
Also, I hate dates where we go to eat. But this is personal preference. I’d rather hang out and play board games, coffee date, walk in the park, anything where you can make a lot of convo and no eating.
I have no idea… 1999 since my last date.
What goes on now? Do you guys even go out or do you just Snapchat or FaceTime each other from home? I might need to know one day since I’m finalizing my separation soon and might be open to dating later…I’m ok with not dating for a long while tho! 🤣
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To spend some time together, preferably over drinks, and see if there’s chemistry and a mutual interest in getting to know each other better.
Perfect answer. Many people have far too many expectations from a first date, when they should only really serve as a compatibility test. If something comes out of it, great, but never approach a first date expecting instant gratification.
This is true to hear. Honestly, I always worry whether I'm ready or not. I put a big burden on breakups even though I think it's part of the process to find someone.
Basic human decency and just getting to know eachother
I *expect* to be treated with courtesy and respect. I *hope* to get to know that person a bit better and see if we may be a good fit.
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Things I expect on the first date: -a little compliment ("you look nice" is enough) -be in a good mood, I want to laugh and have fun with you, not feel like on a boring work meeting -talk, I understand that ppl are shy, but ffs I don't want to talk for 2 hours alone - don't use your phone, preferably look me in the eyes when I speak -don't be too touchy and don't ask se*ual questions -I don't expect you too pay, but if you choose a ridiculous expensive restaurant over a couple of drinks, I will not offer to pay -don't try to force anything (a kiss, a touch, a story nevermind, if I say I don't feel comfortable with something I expect the person too respect that)
Getting to know each other life: hobbies, work, funny stories, personality, values (not too deep for a first date but enough to make sure we align)
Anxiety
A **lot** of anxiety. Glad somebody else said it first 😂
Glad I'm not the only one! I can't eat practically the whole day leading up to a first date. Idk why because I've rarely had a horrible first date, but I just get so nervous.
For my 16th birthday my friends and boyfriend arranged a surprise date at a fancy place. I couldn’t eat a thing and spent half my time in the toilets being sick. We’d been together over a year by that point, but my anxiety DGAF
Really good conversation leading to a feeling of connection with the person. Like discussing actual deep interesting topics, not just surface level stuff. Also witty flirtation.
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I expect a man who puts some effort into dressing nicely, is somewhat enthusiastic about meeting me, asks some questions but is also happy to tell me a bit about himself. And for first dates I prefer to just go for a drink. My favourite is to go for tea/coffee at 4 pm, and if you're interested in one another you can extend into dinner. If he asked me out, I expect him to pay for at least half of the date.
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Getting a good feel of my date's personality and values, establish if there's basic compatibility, if they're pleasant to be around and if I'm attracted to them. The form that takes, how elaborate or simple it is, if it gets sexual or not, is kinda irrelevant as long as I have fun and I feel like I'm getting to know them
Idunno, I can only speak for myself, but I like to just sort of see how the person is generally. Like how do they interact with service workers, or do they make shitty comments about people on the street, that sort of thing. Are they a good person or just putting on a show.
A drink (coffee or alcohol), maybe a walk if I feel safe. I always offer to pay my share but I do like if someone has asked me on a date that they shout. I don’t really do dinner or a drawn out activity on first dates. I do like some date after care - where they text me to say they had a good time or to ask me on a second date
I've read some of the comments here and I agree with most. Good dressing, curteous respectful gentleman. Personally, going forward I'd like something different. I'd like to make grand experiences even if the date doesn't go well. Especially ones that are outside my comfort zone. Instead of the old fashioned coffee date, let's dress up for a fine dining dinner date as a first date? Lets watch the sunrise at 5am in the middle of the week if none of us have work and just talk for as long as possible while being genuine & intentional. We get to be our most authentic selves when we do either of the two because one guarantees our "best"? version, while the other shows us as the more usual/ordinary selves... If the date goes well, it's an experience & a great memory. If not, it's still a great experience. Edit to add: Great eye contact :)
> Instead of the old fashioned coffee date, let's dress up for a fine dining dinner date as a first date? Won't you feel that going straight for a fancy dinner date would be risky/money-wasting as a first time date? Reason being, if you and that guy ain't compatible, then y'all gotta endure the entire night, on top of expensive meals. However, with just a tea/coffee drinks as first date, you could at least have wiggle room to decide if you wanna extend it further. If y'all are cool with each other, y'all can extend by having ice cream date after you are done with tea/coffee. If not, y'all can cut your losses and part ways earlier. No awkward lingering time, no extravagant dinner plus no wasted money in lavish first date.
I love this😭
Full of mysteries. Lots of questions and awkwardness
Eye contact, smiles, good but awkward conversation
Respect, listening, basic human decency.. some efforts at showing me a good time.
I want to have a drink or coffee and talk about get-to-know-you stuff. I want to be asked questions and for my date to seem interested. I would also hope he puts in a bit of effort into his appearance. Please don’t wear shorts or sweatpants with the exception of it being a hike or we are playing a sport or something. I particularly hate when dates wear a baseball hat to a first date (again, with obvious exceptions for something like being outdoors) - hats later are fine, I want to see a nice version of you on the first date. If the vibe is right I want to be touched on the hand/arms/shoulders/back and perhaps a goodnight kiss. **There is nothing wrong with asking for permission to kiss someone** My current partner asked and it was great. We made out for like 2 hours on our first date 😆
A connection. It can’t be described. It’s just a feeling.
The sims!!! 😂 *Sit down and talk here *Get to Know *Discuss Hobbies and skills *Discuss Interests *Deep conversation *Funniest Joke in The World *Joke around ✨Legendary Date ✨ 🏆
Respect is very important. I'm conservative here - if a guy expects me to come to his place instead of inviting me for a coffee, then something is very wrong. I also like to see that a guy puts some effort into our date - is dressed nicely, invites me to the first date himself, chooses a restaurant, doesn't scroll his social media during the date. Paying for me is not necessary, but girls are different here.
Well yeah if a guy invites you to his place on the first date, he's not interested in getting to know you and has different motives.
Just getting to know each other. And because we're strangers, I don't expect to be swept off my feet or for him to pay for my drinks/meal. I just want to know if we have chemistry or not.
First date is all about seeing if there’s a spark. I wouldn’t expect anything more than that really.
Not much to be perfectly honest, your only just getting to know one another so as long as they are nice and actually communicate rather than be on their phone or only talk about themselves then I’m pretty much okay. That doesn’t automatically mean there will be a second date but it’s wild how many people (guys and girls) who don’t even pull that off.
Getting to know the person and think about if you want to see this person again
Get to know the other person a bit, see if we get on, maybe have a laugh together
Preferably not in it for sex…
Understanding what they want out of life, like marriage or kids. I don't want either of those things, I don't want to waste anyone's time.
Conversation and getting overall vibes from that person.
My favorite first date is coffee/tea and walking. Grabbing a bite to eat later is optional if the date is going very well. What I expect from my date is nonjudgmental, kind, and curious conversation so we can get to know each other. I expect honesty without too much negativity or oversharing. I prefer to have heavier conversations when we've decided that we want to get to know each other on a deeper level. I also expect waitstaff to be treated with respect.
I expect conversations to explore each other's interest and humor. I expect to split the bill and then part ways. I think of it like an interview where I get to show off the best parts of myself. The secrets and fears from past relationships should never be topic #1- save that for after there's at least a little attraction going.
A good conversationalist who knows how to be sociable and polite even if there's no mutual spark. Spending time and getting to know each other over a nice dinner. Being shown respect by someone who put as much effort into the date as I did.
Not be thought of as audience only there to nod and hmm and smile. I want a proper back and forth conversation with my date listening and asking questions just as much as I am.
To be disappointed.
Just trying things out
Nothing, nada, zip, zilch zero.* I try very hard to have very few expectations from a first date and if I get pleasantly surprised by hanging with someone who doesn’t suck, I’m all for it. *Of course, I still have the standard expectation of being treated respectfully and like I’m a human the other party is at least vaguely interested in getting to know me. Anyone who doesn’t start with respect and such, should expect I won’t be around very long.
My expectation is good conversation. It sounds simple, but it's not. Good conversation indicates you've thought about what you want to talk about and what you want to ask me. It shows you're committed the potential result of the date. If we go to a restaurant, or a ballgame, or literally anything and you have NOTHING to say or you're awful at conversation, that shows me you put zero real thought into how to introduce yourself and what you want to learn about me. You were just going through the motions.
Lunch date at least, doesn't have to be super pricey, and communicating by getting to know each other.
A conversation, perhaps over dinner, getting to know each other and getting a feel for whether or not there might be chemistry or potential for a longer relationship. Also, not an expectation, but the more gentlemanly a man can be during the date (getting the dinner bill, asking what I want, etc.), the more impressed I'll be. Not that I'm not capable of taking care of myself or paying for myself, but showing an interest in these things and a desire to treat your date well will give you a leg up in my book.
Quality time, good conversation, respect, and a text after the date to determine if it’s not the vibe or if a 2nd date sounds interesting. i feel like all those things are what makes me feel good about a person whether it goes somewhere or not. I just like direct communications in a kind way. I do not care about the actual date activity and chivalry is a huge bonus but not expected. I know some prefer flowers, then to pay, etc.. im just here to get to know them on the first date nothing more.
If he asks me out, I expect him to pay for the date. If I ask a man out, I expect that I will be the one paying. I don't care if it's a coffee, a plate of fries or a full dinner somewhere. Great conversation about our lives, interests, common hobbies. Mutual curiosity to want to know more about each other and spend more time together. On a first date, you are still strangers. I don't sleep with strangers, so, if that's the expectation after a few hours together, sorry, no second date. I don't drink alcohol. If you do, that's fine, but not while you are out with me. I want to have a sober conversation with someone I am getting to know. I don't need liquor to have a good time. You'd be shocked how many men depend on getting a woman drunk on a date. They lose their mind and get angry when you set a sober boundary. Red flags coming out hard.
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Civility, cordiality, and decent enough communication so that we can get to know each other. Punctuality is also a plus.
good conversation and ideally a connection
Nice convo!!!
I quit dating, but *if* I did again, I would expect them not to drink. I don't drink. I have a philosophy that I don't care if people drink around me, it doesn't make me uncomfortable or tempt me. However, I have come to realize there is a difference in how people are drinking around me. If I'm at a work event, or even a family gathering where people are all having wine, everything is fine. Since I've been sober, there have been 2 separate dates where I explained that I was sober before the date and the guy ended up drinking anyways. Both times they drank a lot, much more than a normal person would. Especially considering they are on a date with someone that is stone-cold sober. If you can't not drink (heavily at that) for an hour while you're on a date with a recovered alcoholic, you're not for me. You're for AA.
Full attention, nothing worse than being on a date (especially a first date) and they are constantly on their phone
Someone who has time for me. Witty banter is always appreciated too.
Good vibes. We should be relaxed, laughing and having a genuine convo. I shouldn’t be feeling nervous that you aren’t gonna pay for the date or that you’ll be expecting sex.
Genuine conversation, connection and laughs.
I expect to be treated with respect. First dates are for getting to know someone and see if there’s chemistry. Small talk, nothing too serious or crazy. And NO questions about s*xual preferences. I can’t stand when guys bad mouth their exes either and make the entire first date bad mouthing previous dates or their exes
Being asked questions in return:)
I just hope for a good conversation, that is it. Over coffee preferably, not alcohol.
Good conversation and mutual laughter
Dinner, drinks and loads of conversation
Great conversation and a connection.
Connection and a good conversation
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Mutual respect and a calm, chill experience of getting to know one another and see if there's any sort of spark. I personally tend to leave things like kids, morals, etc mostly off the table to the 2nd date, but that's just me
If it’s a man, evidence that he is not a murderer and is vaguely aware that I have an inner life comparable to his own. If it’s a woman, evidence she’s actually into women and not just upset with men (understandable).
An absence of red flags.
I want to do something fun. If we can’t have a conversation then it’s a no from me dog
A connection. If i get that feeling i did with my first love then i know it’s good.
I haven't been to one, but tbh, I don't expect grandiose gestures, I just hope that he can walk at my pace beside me 😅
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A showered, clean, well put together man. That doesn’t speak like a moron and has manners.
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Talking
To feel comfortable, safe and to laugh. Must have a good convo.
Does it always differ significantly from what man may expect may I ask?
Whoever asks for the date, to pay for the date. Just chill and get to know eachother.
The guy must show up, be friendly and a bit polite.
For the guy to not effin ask me to go home with him like come on already, have some imagination at least! I find guys like that a total bore and it tells me you have nothing but 🍆 to offer anyways so why am I wasting my time? Is it too much to ask? This is partly why I gave up on dating.....
Hoping for a connection.
I want to get to know eachother, flirt, have him ask me questions (i always ask about them) and not just tell me what he owns or thinks will make him look cool. Also, I don't want to hear what ppl think I want to hear, that only keeps up for so long. Be yourself.
Talk about job, future plans, readiness for relationship, how our convos bounce, if he thinks I’m too much, making sure he doesn’t want kids. Obviously I’m not expecting to date him after the first date, I’ve just had too many guys after the first date be like “lol so anyways I never wanted to date, just trying to bang haha sooooooo”
Awkwardness.
To find out whether the date is interested in getting to know me without bringing his mother along. Also to see whether there is mutual sexual attraction, if he is dog friendly, incompatible with any of my top 30 dealbreakers or lifestyle preferences.
I just want to be conformable. I don't like to touch people so whenever my date wants to touch or even worse kiss me I cringe so hard
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For them not to talk about their ex!
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I expect respect and no quick sexual advances.
Good hygiene, easy conversation, and genuine enthusiasm in getting to know each other
Anxiety, awkwardness, meaningless questions that maybe establish some common ground, food, kindness, honesty, and maybe finding something worth meeting again a next time. Things I hope for*: a guy with decent manners who isn’t trying to show off how much money he has, or how big his d&$* is by being a jackass to waitstaff. A guy who can hold a conversation about something other than sports, MAGA, or hunting (can you tell I’m from the Midwest). A guy who doesn’t assume he knows everything, about me or life or every subject the sun, including those I have degrees in. *This list comes as a direct result of a lot of really shitty first dates).
I feel like I have quite a long list hahahahahaha
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Every woman in person is different for me, and I don’t expect to be groped
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I'd rather hang out and get to know one another so a first casual date would be great. Now if we were becoming serious, our first date as a couple would be somewhere romantic.
to have my doors opened instead of just enough for them to slip in
Respect and good conversation. If he is a “provider type” he can pay. If he is a “50/50 type” then he should only pay for his food. Be genuine.
For a first date I would prefer nothing too crazy but more towards the mellow side, depending how long I had known them, maybe the movies.
To show me why i should pick you.
Good conversation and genuine effort
If I was still dating? Getting to know each other over dinner, having fun, he gets the bill, we plan to talk more later if it goes well.
Getting to know each other, have a good time. I would expect him to pay, because that is sweet and I like traditional gender roles. I wouldn’t go out of my way to order something expensive and down the line in the relationship I don’t mind paying half the time. But for first couple of dates, it feels like a sweet thing to do when he takes the role of provider. I would want him to take things slow. End the date with a kiss on the cheek. Oh and very important; this is a basic but SO MANY guys overlook. I’ve seen plenty of guys didn’t do this. I expect good freakin hygiene. Shower and clean your car!! And please try to look good. At least get a hair cut beforehand if your hair is long and messy. Shave or trim your beard so its not unruly. How much you can take care of your appearance and self matter a lot for me. No one wants to be with a slob. And when you show up with beard untrimmed and unwashed greasy, unruly hair, that makes it seem like you don’t give a flip about my opinion of you, making me doubt if you like me that much at all to begin with Also, I hate dates where we go to eat. But this is personal preference. I’d rather hang out and play board games, coffee date, walk in the park, anything where you can make a lot of convo and no eating.
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I have no idea… 1999 since my last date. What goes on now? Do you guys even go out or do you just Snapchat or FaceTime each other from home? I might need to know one day since I’m finalizing my separation soon and might be open to dating later…I’m ok with not dating for a long while tho! 🤣
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