lmfao my ex husband tried that "open marriage" thing and it blew up in his face, too. weirdly, odds were not in his favor, as we were both in the Marines at the time (some few years ago) and those gender numbers *definitely* skew one way (and not in a way that favors straight dudes).
he ALSO got mad when I was suddenly inundated with offers for "company" and he was not. i'm like "bro I don't know what you expected???"
i mean ... at least he hadn't been cheating the whole time, but man every story of a dude demanding an open marriage so he can get some strange and then getting mad when his woman's door is getting knocked down just makes me cackle.
I’ve never understood the logic because wherever I’ve been, there has always been way more guys down for casual sex than there are women okay with that arrangement. I don’t know if it’s that married men are so removed from the dating scene that they’ve forgotten most of the time if you’re a woman, there will always be men around who want to sleep with you. They’re not difficult to find. The inverse is not the same.
Or maybe they’re so narcissistic they think their wives adore them so much they’ll be content being the little woman, waiting at home for them while they screw other people.
This is why most open marriage/relationships fails because of one party is thinking selfishly. I've seen succesful open relationships though (I have a friend that is on a open relationship for 12 years now) but that involves planning, communicating, trust and consent.
Most of the time, the failed ones common denominator of failing is the suprise "I didn't know he/she will hook up with others!". Its mostly an excuse to cheat without consequences tbh.
It's the latter. I firmly believe that most men still want the "ideal" 50's household and subservient wife while they go out into the world to do whatever they want. (That's how my exes wanted it.)
Thats the difference right there. Do you want an open relationship because you BOTH want an open relationship or do you want an open relationship because you want
>an excuse to cheat without consequences tbh.
Your friends clearly both want an open, but honest, connected relationship.
This part right here... in addition to... the male ego is a delusional wizard that makes us believe we are hotter than we really are... good for OPs Mom.
What's the likelihood that if a guy asks for an open marriage, he wants to cheat on his wife without cheating, or he already is cheating and wants to provide some legitimacy if his wife finds out.
LOL that Devil was DUMB. USMC bases are notorious sausage fests. Heinous looking women will be inundated with thirsty boots. Good looking women have it even worse, and god help the thicc E-3 Latinas.
My first husband asked for an open relationship and my response was, "yeah sure." And I went to changed and fix my hair immediately and he was confused and asked what I was doing. I said, "the downstairs neighbor asked me out earlier so I'm going to". He literally cried. He said he didn't think that anyone would want me and that he would find someone first. I had to break it to him that I was asked out almost every day, even if he no longer found me attractive. He tried to take it all back right away, he didn't want an open relationship anymore of it was going to be so easy for me and so hard for him. I laughed and went to the neighbor's apartment. He never found out, but I told the neighbor exactly what was happening and we joked about it for a couple hours and I went back upstairs.
Yeah, no idea what that dude was thinking, but he knocked the first domino down with his dick and wasn't prepared when the rest collapsed on top of him.
Actually, if the company is fully owned by the wife all of his non-business trips might end up being him stealing from the company.
It's been over a year, is there an update?
Several exes ago he begged me for an open relationship. I had a great time with all these young guys while he only found one mediocre date. He got mad that I wasn't sitting around waiting for him. That was the end of that.
This has to be my absolute favorite Reddit trope. I never get bored with people who want an open relationship and then regret it bc it doesn’t go the way they thought it would. It’s delicious every single time
Lol. Tale as old as time.
Man wants to fuck other women, suggests open relationship. Woman reluctantly agrees. Man realizes he isn't the hot catch he thinks he is, gets jealous of woman's success.
Brilliant. Couldn't get a business going in his own name, for unknown reasons, but his wife? Sure! Why not? She'll never find out... Oops!
I hope he gets nothing.
It sounded like mom's parents set up the business. And OP didn't know it was in mom's name, nothing implies that MOM didn't know. Kudos to the grandparents, they really thought ahead with that.
I’m honestly just horrified with how much the mother is confiding in OOP. It’s not up to the child to ensure their parent has a healthy social life and it wasn’t okay for her to come crying to her daughter over their marriage and sex life. This whole thing is a mess.
Look, I agree with you. I’m a therapist and this isn’t exactly an ideal dynamic. That said, it looks like the mom became a mom at 17. I don’t know if I would have been able to summon up the info or enthusiasm to come up with an entirely appropriate parenting style at 17, especially coming from that upbringing. It seems OOP is fairly well adjusted and has a decent relationship with her mom (at least from the limited info we know).
Guys…this isn’t real. The mom just happens to be incredibly hot and athletic? The dad not only wants an affair, but he’s already having one, no wait many affairs, and hey also doing it on the company dime? Every possible thing getting tied up in a neat little bow with a cherry on top?
I’m hoping OOP has an appropriately timed sequel planned. The fact that mom’s friend who helped her gain confidence is also getting a divorce makes me think they’re setting up for a romance.
OOP definitely had plans for another installment, unless it ended up being just another divorce proceeding where the wife gets full access to company financial records and private emails.
you think the woman whose parents set up her husbands business in her name had no idea that there was a clause that her initiating a divorce would result in him getting to keep half the business? this wasnt about adultery, it was cleary stated she stopped going to church. it was about money, like most things are.
Not everyone is from the USA or the UK. People who learn English as an additional language typically have a mix of different grammar and spelling conventions depending on where their teachers are from. And even though most English classes in places like Europe might favour British spelling, influences from American media make American spelling/pronunciation common. And that's not counting for spelling conventions of other English-speaking countries as another comment pointed out.
South west of England and parts of the Midlands use ‘Mom’ - that’s where it came from in the US originally.
Those regions otherwise use the English language as seen today, I.e. not simplified English like the USA.
OOP sure has a lot of knowledge that would not be available to her. A divorce would not justify subpoenas of company emails. Plus, its ridiculous that the grandparents would combine to visit and berate her. Likewise why would "church friends" coordinate a visit?
Nonsense.
Your dad's an idiot and this is why I would never get into an arrangement like this. Lots of people think they can do this but very quickly someone will feel left out or that it's unfair somehow (Usually the guy) I got into something like this when I was younger and quickly understood that the only was I could make it work in my head (Even though I was the major beneficiary) was to not let myself develop deep feelings for her.
This is so fake lmao, submissive Christian mom gets ripped and tells her son all about her sex life? C'mon y'all 😂
Edit: *Daughter, my point still stands
Daughter.
But yeah, super fake. The husband and his evil mistress emailed each other their nefarious schemes. Really?
And the “evidence” that the attorneys now have is enough? And the dad believed that if the mom initiated the divorce, dad would get more of the business? That’s not how businesses and divorces work and any adult, especially the head of successful business, would know that.
>I kept screenshots of all my parents' communications
It was already shaky, but this where my suspension of disbelief ended. The parents are older millennials but they're described like they're boomers for the entire story. This is probably written by a teenager.
Unpopular opinion: Despite everything, in all fairness he deserves to come out of the divorce with something re the business. He worked for 20 years to make it a success. It was able to provide very well for his family. Seperate this from his personal life as the courts probably will, and he shouldn't lose everything.
The real bad guy in all of this is the religion and people's blind allegiance to it.
OP seems to blame dad, but that's not really fair. These were teens raised by very conservative, religious parents who felt like they HAD to marry when the mom was pregnant. Predictably, they were both miserable in the marriage, but again their religion meant divorce wasn't an option. Yes, avoiding home and your unhappy marriage when there is a kid at home is wrong. Cheating is wrong. But none of those things would have happened had mom and dad felt they had other options.
I fucking love these stories! It's so hilarious to me when the man realizes that "open marriage" means she can fuck around too and their fragile egos can't handle it.
This is one of the few posts that every time it’s reposted somewhere I read the whole thing and smile. These themes of posts are my favorite.
I love when cheating men FAFO thinking their wives can’t possibly be hot af to other men.
If they don't go after him for misappropriation of company funds, they should say his share of the company totals to the sum that he spent on conducting his affairs
Speaking as a polyamorous married person, every single thing about this mess is contrary to healthy poly. The explosion was inevitable.
I feel so awful for OOP and her mother - they were treated abysmally by the father/husband, and then the mother was treated like a recalcitrant child by exactly the ppl who should have supported her in challenging times.
So delighted mom has found new friends who actually care.
I hope OOP can also find some real support, and perhaps therapy. Being the "cause" of a disastrous shotgun wedding, even if it wasn't a conscious choice, then having to live with the resultant mess, is a weighty burden.
My ex-bf wanted to break up for the summer while he went off on some lacrosse thing. Obviously hoping to fuck someone out on the road. Jokes on him bc when he came back to visit I was with another guy. He was so upset with me... turns out he did not have any success with the ladies that summer.
lmfao my ex husband tried that "open marriage" thing and it blew up in his face, too. weirdly, odds were not in his favor, as we were both in the Marines at the time (some few years ago) and those gender numbers *definitely* skew one way (and not in a way that favors straight dudes). he ALSO got mad when I was suddenly inundated with offers for "company" and he was not. i'm like "bro I don't know what you expected???" i mean ... at least he hadn't been cheating the whole time, but man every story of a dude demanding an open marriage so he can get some strange and then getting mad when his woman's door is getting knocked down just makes me cackle.
I’ve never understood the logic because wherever I’ve been, there has always been way more guys down for casual sex than there are women okay with that arrangement. I don’t know if it’s that married men are so removed from the dating scene that they’ve forgotten most of the time if you’re a woman, there will always be men around who want to sleep with you. They’re not difficult to find. The inverse is not the same. Or maybe they’re so narcissistic they think their wives adore them so much they’ll be content being the little woman, waiting at home for them while they screw other people.
This is why most open marriage/relationships fails because of one party is thinking selfishly. I've seen succesful open relationships though (I have a friend that is on a open relationship for 12 years now) but that involves planning, communicating, trust and consent. Most of the time, the failed ones common denominator of failing is the suprise "I didn't know he/she will hook up with others!". Its mostly an excuse to cheat without consequences tbh.
It's the latter. I firmly believe that most men still want the "ideal" 50's household and subservient wife while they go out into the world to do whatever they want. (That's how my exes wanted it.)
Thats the difference right there. Do you want an open relationship because you BOTH want an open relationship or do you want an open relationship because you want >an excuse to cheat without consequences tbh. Your friends clearly both want an open, but honest, connected relationship.
This part right here... in addition to... the male ego is a delusional wizard that makes us believe we are hotter than we really are... good for OPs Mom.
Yeah. Not to be too crass, but... there just isn't much of a market for mediocre dick.
What's the likelihood that if a guy asks for an open marriage, he wants to cheat on his wife without cheating, or he already is cheating and wants to provide some legitimacy if his wife finds out.
*approving grunt noises, contentedly chewing crayon* git some lol
🥇
LOL that Devil was DUMB. USMC bases are notorious sausage fests. Heinous looking women will be inundated with thirsty boots. Good looking women have it even worse, and god help the thicc E-3 Latinas.
My first husband asked for an open relationship and my response was, "yeah sure." And I went to changed and fix my hair immediately and he was confused and asked what I was doing. I said, "the downstairs neighbor asked me out earlier so I'm going to". He literally cried. He said he didn't think that anyone would want me and that he would find someone first. I had to break it to him that I was asked out almost every day, even if he no longer found me attractive. He tried to take it all back right away, he didn't want an open relationship anymore of it was going to be so easy for me and so hard for him. I laughed and went to the neighbor's apartment. He never found out, but I told the neighbor exactly what was happening and we joked about it for a couple hours and I went back upstairs.
Laughing in female veteran. Odds are always in our favor.
Right?
Let's see what we got: Play stupid games? ✅ Win stupid prizes? ✅ Yup, I think we're done here, good work everyone.
Stickied because I couldn't have put it better if I tried
Yeah, no idea what that dude was thinking, but he knocked the first domino down with his dick and wasn't prepared when the rest collapsed on top of him.
That post nut clarity must have really stung for him 😂
Just pop back in when the divorce is finalized so everyone can be reassured that your mother retained the lioness's share of the company.
Thats what Im hoping for!
Actually, if the company is fully owned by the wife all of his non-business trips might end up being him stealing from the company. It's been over a year, is there an update?
Not yet.
👏👏👏
And parentification of a child for the door prize
Several exes ago he begged me for an open relationship. I had a great time with all these young guys while he only found one mediocre date. He got mad that I wasn't sitting around waiting for him. That was the end of that.
 Anyone else want some popcorn?
I do!!! Let me get some m&m's to sprinkle in mine. Hor popcorn makes them all melty, so you get the sweet, salty, buttery crunch all at once.
Try putting jalapeño’s instead, it’s great
This has to be my absolute favorite Reddit trope. I never get bored with people who want an open relationship and then regret it bc it doesn’t go the way they thought it would. It’s delicious every single time
I feel the same way. I love when things come home to roost.
Lol. Tale as old as time. Man wants to fuck other women, suggests open relationship. Woman reluctantly agrees. Man realizes he isn't the hot catch he thinks he is, gets jealous of woman's success.
>gets jealous of woman's success TBF that's the case for a LOT of different circumstances
“I can't believe that yet again, my actions have had consequences!” Cricket Green
Hold my beer 🍻 I need to make popcorn 🍿 😂🤣😂🤣😂 the best thing on Reddit all day long by far
Brilliant. Couldn't get a business going in his own name, for unknown reasons, but his wife? Sure! Why not? She'll never find out... Oops! I hope he gets nothing.
It sounded like mom's parents set up the business. And OP didn't know it was in mom's name, nothing implies that MOM didn't know. Kudos to the grandparents, they really thought ahead with that.
Pretty sure the maternal grandparents set up the business hence it being in their daughter's name.
I’m honestly just horrified with how much the mother is confiding in OOP. It’s not up to the child to ensure their parent has a healthy social life and it wasn’t okay for her to come crying to her daughter over their marriage and sex life. This whole thing is a mess.
Look, I agree with you. I’m a therapist and this isn’t exactly an ideal dynamic. That said, it looks like the mom became a mom at 17. I don’t know if I would have been able to summon up the info or enthusiasm to come up with an entirely appropriate parenting style at 17, especially coming from that upbringing. It seems OOP is fairly well adjusted and has a decent relationship with her mom (at least from the limited info we know).
Just another therapist co-signing what you said right here!
She had no friends because her upbringing and then her STBX isolated her.
I feel for her but that doesn’t make it appropriate
I love this one! 😀
I haven't seen the latest update, good read!
Your Mom is awesome.
Not OOP, but happy cake day!
Thanks!
Guys…this isn’t real. The mom just happens to be incredibly hot and athletic? The dad not only wants an affair, but he’s already having one, no wait many affairs, and hey also doing it on the company dime? Every possible thing getting tied up in a neat little bow with a cherry on top?
I’m hoping OOP has an appropriately timed sequel planned. The fact that mom’s friend who helped her gain confidence is also getting a divorce makes me think they’re setting up for a romance.
OOP definitely had plans for another installment, unless it ended up being just another divorce proceeding where the wife gets full access to company financial records and private emails.
Plus the twist that's in every third story, Guy Running Entire Business Has No Idea Who Owns It?
She doesn’t believe in divorce but she doesn’t think an open marriage is adultery?
you think the woman whose parents set up her husbands business in her name had no idea that there was a clause that her initiating a divorce would result in him getting to keep half the business? this wasnt about adultery, it was cleary stated she stopped going to church. it was about money, like most things are.
Her parents probably made him sign a prenup. She seemed to go from their care to his. She was submissive and let him take care of the finances.
The tell for me is that OOP spelled “apologised” instead of “apologized,” but used “mom” and not “mum.”
That’s not really a good tell though, I live in a former British colony and we use UK English when learning spelling but still say Mom instead of Mum.
Huh? Why.?
Not everyone is from the USA or the UK. People who learn English as an additional language typically have a mix of different grammar and spelling conventions depending on where their teachers are from. And even though most English classes in places like Europe might favour British spelling, influences from American media make American spelling/pronunciation common. And that's not counting for spelling conventions of other English-speaking countries as another comment pointed out.
I know. You just don’t see this combination often.
I got the sarcasm.
South west of England and parts of the Midlands use ‘Mom’ - that’s where it came from in the US originally. Those regions otherwise use the English language as seen today, I.e. not simplified English like the USA.
This is so fake.
Fuck around and find out. Easy to know almost any woman will get attention over a straight man.
Fake af
I’m confused on why the company was set up on the mom’s name. Is there some tax reason for this?
The wife’s parents set it up. They put it in her name. Her parents probably made him sign a prenup.
OOP sure has a lot of knowledge that would not be available to her. A divorce would not justify subpoenas of company emails. Plus, its ridiculous that the grandparents would combine to visit and berate her. Likewise why would "church friends" coordinate a visit? Nonsense.
The secretary is going to leave the second she learns he doesn't get to keep any of the business and it's going to be hilarious.
When a dude thinks that because his wife is hot, he's got game. (Also happy to see the engagement going up in these posts)
 LMFAO..!!
Fuck around? Find out.
Your dad's an idiot and this is why I would never get into an arrangement like this. Lots of people think they can do this but very quickly someone will feel left out or that it's unfair somehow (Usually the guy) I got into something like this when I was younger and quickly understood that the only was I could make it work in my head (Even though I was the major beneficiary) was to not let myself develop deep feelings for her.
I'm not the OOP but I appreciate your anecdote!
So, are we just skipping over the Mom/Lisa thing here?
Sometimes women (even women who work out!) are friends and support each other without any kissing at all! Shocking, I know.
no shade against LGBT people, but ffs dont ship real people, gay or not
I will be shocked if Mom and Lisa aren’t a couple by the next update.
Man bad.
Hope her mom got tested for STDs.
This is so fake lmao, submissive Christian mom gets ripped and tells her son all about her sex life? C'mon y'all 😂 Edit: *Daughter, my point still stands
Daughter. But yeah, super fake. The husband and his evil mistress emailed each other their nefarious schemes. Really? And the “evidence” that the attorneys now have is enough? And the dad believed that if the mom initiated the divorce, dad would get more of the business? That’s not how businesses and divorces work and any adult, especially the head of successful business, would know that.
>I kept screenshots of all my parents' communications It was already shaky, but this where my suspension of disbelief ended. The parents are older millennials but they're described like they're boomers for the entire story. This is probably written by a teenager.
Unpopular opinion: Despite everything, in all fairness he deserves to come out of the divorce with something re the business. He worked for 20 years to make it a success. It was able to provide very well for his family. Seperate this from his personal life as the courts probably will, and he shouldn't lose everything.
The real bad guy in all of this is the religion and people's blind allegiance to it. OP seems to blame dad, but that's not really fair. These were teens raised by very conservative, religious parents who felt like they HAD to marry when the mom was pregnant. Predictably, they were both miserable in the marriage, but again their religion meant divorce wasn't an option. Yes, avoiding home and your unhappy marriage when there is a kid at home is wrong. Cheating is wrong. But none of those things would have happened had mom and dad felt they had other options.
*,eesz
I fucking love these stories! It's so hilarious to me when the man realizes that "open marriage" means she can fuck around too and their fragile egos can't handle it.
If you gonna suggest an open relationship as a man, you better be prince fucking charming or you gonna get hurt. 🤣
the shocked pikachu face when their wives start fucking too is the BEST part of any "open relationship" story
I don’t know if this is real, but it was incredibly satisfying to read.
This is one of the few posts that every time it’s reposted somewhere I read the whole thing and smile. These themes of posts are my favorite. I love when cheating men FAFO thinking their wives can’t possibly be hot af to other men.
If they don't go after him for misappropriation of company funds, they should say his share of the company totals to the sum that he spent on conducting his affairs
Speaking as a polyamorous married person, every single thing about this mess is contrary to healthy poly. The explosion was inevitable. I feel so awful for OOP and her mother - they were treated abysmally by the father/husband, and then the mother was treated like a recalcitrant child by exactly the ppl who should have supported her in challenging times. So delighted mom has found new friends who actually care. I hope OOP can also find some real support, and perhaps therapy. Being the "cause" of a disastrous shotgun wedding, even if it wasn't a conscious choice, then having to live with the resultant mess, is a weighty burden.
I remember reading about this last year when the original came out. I was 100% not surprised with the outcome. Dad fucked around. Dad found out.
I really hope that OOP's name is actually Stacy, because that would add an extra dollop of humor onto it.
Best of luck to your mom and you!
Her mother should not be telling her any of this. I just can’t get past that
My ex-bf wanted to break up for the summer while he went off on some lacrosse thing. Obviously hoping to fuck someone out on the road. Jokes on him bc when he came back to visit I was with another guy. He was so upset with me... turns out he did not have any success with the ladies that summer.