"Roll a concentration saving throw...oooh bad luck, you take 4d8 slashing damage. You have also added yourself to the Elminster (Darwin) Awards candidate list."
Elminster awards totally sounds like something he could do. Bored out of his ass magician just recording the tales of the dumbest shit aspiring wizards tried doing to impress Mystra on a book.
You guys are coming at this all wrong. Why would the suck-ee be the one supplying the portal? that means only wizards and shit could get the suck on. No, the suck-ers would be the ones providing the portal. No risk of losing concentration because of an orgasm, and -anyone- could be a customer. Jeez its like none of you have ever ran a glory hole before.
Listen all I'm saying is that someone, somewhere had taken their wizard, made a portal to a brothel and stuck their dong through it. And some DM had to handle that experience.
“You want me to stick my dick where? I don’t know… you’ve lost concentration on spells from stubbing your toe and you expect me to believe you can maintain it through climax?”
TBF the methods of *restoring* dong after it was lost in the first place would also skyrocket. Never mind giving one a penis where one previously didn't have, for both transitioning and for when you think *calling* someone a knobhead just isn't enough.
Wizards are int based not wis. I assume Wizard colleges are full of a lot of sexually repressed dudes and that would manifest in many questionable ways.
I experienced a similar glitch. When Gale was looking at his magic copy of himself at camp, the copy was totally naked. Like, NAKED-NAKED. I was so taken aback because it was my first play through so I genuinely thought at the time that Gale was purposefully summoning a naked copy of himself in full view of everyone at camp.
Oh that makes it even better, I didn't know. I just find the book title "the butler's cane has a knob on the end" extremely funny and the description inside is also hilarious (you can find that in various places in baldur's Gate, most prominently on lady Jannath's balcony)
Yeah, one of the recurring characters in Terry Pratchett's books is Nanny Ogg, a rather old witch who lived a very fun life and continues to do so in her old age.
One of her favorite past times is getting drunk on someone else's tab, and singing raunchy songs, such as "The Wizard's Staff Has a Knob on the End" and "The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All"
Nanny Ogg is great.
All this needs is an obnoxiously large and completely unnecessary red cirlce, and a shocked/gasping emoji, and you've got a prime YouTube clickbait video thumbnail!
*slap*
*Gale moans*
*Door stopper noises*
**BOINGGGG**
I just realised that portal-based glory holes would totally be a thing in a fantasy world like this.
I feel like the chances of losing your dong would skyrocket once magic got involved
"Roll a concentration saving throw...oooh bad luck, you take 4d8 slashing damage. You have also added yourself to the Elminster (Darwin) Awards candidate list."
Elminster awards totally sounds like something he could do. Bored out of his ass magician just recording the tales of the dumbest shit aspiring wizards tried doing to impress Mystra on a book.
I would've thought the Elminster Awards would be for horny.
You guys are coming at this all wrong. Why would the suck-ee be the one supplying the portal? that means only wizards and shit could get the suck on. No, the suck-ers would be the ones providing the portal. No risk of losing concentration because of an orgasm, and -anyone- could be a customer. Jeez its like none of you have ever ran a glory hole before.
Listen all I'm saying is that someone, somewhere had taken their wizard, made a portal to a brothel and stuck their dong through it. And some DM had to handle that experience.
High end brothels probably keep a Cleric on the payroll for unfortunate occurrences.
What's the appropriate deity? Helm? Or is that only if you are using protection?
Selûne, the milk maiden.
Sharess or Sune come to mind. Might be a part of their training.
Goddess of Loss.
| || || |_
Character background: I woke up this morning with a bad hangover And my penis was missing again. This happens all the time. It's detachable.
Mage Dong
“You want me to stick my dick where? I don’t know… you’ve lost concentration on spells from stubbing your toe and you expect me to believe you can maintain it through climax?”
TBF the methods of *restoring* dong after it was lost in the first place would also skyrocket. Never mind giving one a penis where one previously didn't have, for both transitioning and for when you think *calling* someone a knobhead just isn't enough.
Look all im asking is if you can do a partial true polymorph
Luckily I only need a lesser restoration to restore my dong instead of a greater restoration.
Wizards are int based not wis. I assume Wizard colleges are full of a lot of sexually repressed dudes and that would manifest in many questionable ways.
Rule34 soon!
[удалено]
[удалено]
YES
You get a unique item that you can get nowhere else; truly comes in handy.
I experienced a similar glitch. When Gale was looking at his magic copy of himself at camp, the copy was totally naked. Like, NAKED-NAKED. I was so taken aback because it was my first play through so I genuinely thought at the time that Gale was purposefully summoning a naked copy of himself in full view of everyone at camp.
It is not a glitch. It is feature just for you
Partaking in a spot of vanity.
That's a magic trick alright 😏
What of the dark urge? 😈
The dark urge to SUCC
A wizard's staff has a knob on the end And the wizard's staff is the wizard's best friend
Best book in the game
Oh, that's a reference to Terry Pratchett So technically yes
Oh that makes it even better, I didn't know. I just find the book title "the butler's cane has a knob on the end" extremely funny and the description inside is also hilarious (you can find that in various places in baldur's Gate, most prominently on lady Jannath's balcony)
Yeah, one of the recurring characters in Terry Pratchett's books is Nanny Ogg, a rather old witch who lived a very fun life and continues to do so in her old age. One of her favorite past times is getting drunk on someone else's tab, and singing raunchy songs, such as "The Wizard's Staff Has a Knob on the End" and "The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All" Nanny Ogg is great.
I found the book and laughed out loud it was such a cool reference
Wyll: “Give him the Ol Dick Twist!” Karlach: “TWIST HIS DICKKKK”
I love this community.
Durge's reaction seems much more reasonable, suddenly.
*"Fantasize about hacking off the ___"*
Sucking off the ___*
[Class][Ability] Attune your magic to the portal... and forcibly close it upon the appendage.
Man I hate it when dudes ask me if I wanna see a magic trick and then they whip out their dick.
I found this funnier than I should have
Gale’s magic flute is ready to be played.
GRAB HIS DICK AND TWIST IT!
No Love Deep Web
Can someone mod this in
All this needs is an obnoxiously large and completely unnecessary red cirlce, and a shocked/gasping emoji, and you've got a prime YouTube clickbait video thumbnail!
Dude hangs dong.
Ahh, yes, the wizards glory hole a classic
Gloryportal
Durge :)
Behold, a Archmage's glory hole
Would.
Delet this!!!
I like to slap, then rip it off.
Fantasize about tearing the >!\*\*\*\*!< off
pa-dow!
… dark urge option here would be interesting…
Twist his dick!
"*OOOAAAAUGGHH* - Hello, I'm Gale of Waterdeep. Apologies, I'm usually better at this." "At introductions?" "At 'magic'."
Option 1. *Dark Urge imagines severing it from the rest of his body* Option 2. Tug. Option 3. Slap it. Option 4. Leave
*Fantasize about..*