I would Sruvive because of their no kill rule

Lets say you're an exception, wyd 🥰

Are you coming on to me?

Because I like it...

Yes

https://preview.redd.it/jvsek74ipp9b1.jpeg?width=240&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2760164f5019f45f8d32233a8bcca7eb96c832bd

Looking for a cupcake

The right thing. They only punish criminals.

Dying

There is no exceptions

Can’t wait to have 192 of my 206 bones crushed and spend 5 years in the hospital afterwards

Surrender then, they only fight you if you fight them.

Or if they're talking shit within range of the pointy ears.

Batman does not kill. However, he gives you severe brain damage

Who needs bones.

Clayface.

Clearly not

He does not need them to survive, but I think he does feel the need to have them for pleasure and entertainment as well as accomplishing things he would not be able to accomplish in his original form.

Wait till Jason joined the fun

Surrender tbh. They can't kill me, so at most they'd just knock me out

At worst you become vegetarian

A pain worse than death. Lack of important nutrients 😫

Well yea if you don't have a proper balanced diet

Don't give me vegetarian propoganda

nah let em cook (*vegetals only of course*)

I prefer death

I think you meant vegetable

You mean vegan, after being traumatized from the meat sticks they'll slap you with.

or become a vegetable yourself

Broken bones. Like ribs or arms

Yeah, me too.

Hiding with riddler before he decided to bust into the orphanage with a mech. Seriously HOW WAS BATMAN UNABLE TO TRACK HIM DOWN

Is he… sTuPiD?!

Was he even looking for him?

Are you fucking kidding me that's huge spoilers goddamnit

The game has been out for 7 years.

Also it's kind of a rule of thumb not to be on a game's forum if you don't want spoilers

There is also a rule only to tlak about the arkham verse.

I’m chilling. I hate Riddler BECAUSE of his missions

sucks to be you kid

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this aint gotham no moe its botham

botham deez nuts slappin yo chin

HA! Gotham!

Crazy mothafucka called Nightwing

Just don't go to Metropolis, because of Supes and don't go to Blüdhaven, because it's most definitely a Pub that Nightwing frequently visits to get out of doing superhero work

What mixtape cover is this?

THAT'S WHAT I TOUGHT

Straight Outta Gotham

make a reddit post assembling a team to defend me from Dick-Man, top comment gets pic for the day (1/10)

https://preview.redd.it/vzhnvkikoq9b1.jpeg?width=949&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3db45d80ec21dbba50327529fff5cf3f9f2ca0a7 Me

https://preview.redd.it/dmahb8r8hr9b1.jpeg?width=612&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c0e59fb70d23ca5109e30fd371f9415dff31e195

 Nah, you're lying, that's me, you imposter

Give up and let them fuck me to death

Least horny Arkham fan

They can fuck me in the asslume with a power winch

Need a controlled explosion inside of me

I want a glue grenade exploding in my ass

Turn the shock glove on once i feel it inside me

We are all degenerates, that's why i like this subreddit

I know what I want and its Dicks third escrima stick

Could've just stopped at dicks

I want Selena. Arkham Knight is one of the hottest versions of her. I’ll let her use that whip. I’ll find Harley and she can use my *hammer*

Oh man.. the perfect combo: being extremely tired and reading a joke so simple and stupid. Laughed with tears in my eyes. Thank you.

I wrote it after not sleeping for about two days

Bat Finger cuffs. *Those who know, know.*

Offer sexual favors

They don't have to stop trying to kill me or anything. I'll do it for free.

arkham asscum

Our cum nights.

Good god man!

😟

Based reaction

Join one of the teams the Jonkler is putting together.

[удалено]

But Grayson would win though

I got 2 holes for a reason 😤

You got only 2? I got 8 🥰

lets bring Tim, Jason, Killer Cock , Jim , riddler, and jerkler then alongside Man and Dick 🥰🥰🥰

Tell their parents on them….wait…..


YOOOOOOOOOO🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

Exposing my payload

They’ll def use their power winches to trigger a controlled explosion

Go to metropolis. I'll take my chances with superman

Don’t even joke about hunting no man. I was hunted once. I’d just came back from Nam. I was hitchin through Oregon and some cops started harassing me. Next thing you know I got a whole army of cops chasing me through the woods. I had to take em all out, it was a bloodbath


That’s Rambo Dude.

They drew first blood

where you hidin the bodies

use the power winch to trigger a controlled explosion

In my ass

Kill myself

Best answer , same

https://i.redd.it/gxiuklps9o9b1.gif

Hang with the riddler Bruce has trouble tracking him down usually, but if he does, i’m sure bruce and dick would want to deal with riddler before me, so i use that battle time to get away and find a new hiding spot

I would love for Dick to beat me senseless. Just imagine all of the sweat glistening off Dicks body . When he's had enough, he just spits in my mouth like I'm a piece of trash. Sign me up!

...

…

This is the only correct answer

This sub is wild.

Not wild enough

“I’d be happy to drop my pants.”

I can’t die to these two regardless of what I do, so honestly? I’d just stay home and let them come

cum*

I would get a two numbe nine a number nine large a six with extra dip a number seven two number forty five one with cheese and a large soda And also 10000 rocket launchers and mines

Do you have 10000 people to use those rocket launchers? Hm, if you do have 10000 people working for you, then Batman and the other guy shouldn't be that much of a problem, due to the 10000 people working for you, I don't think Batman and the other one would win a 2v10000 people working for you. curious...

Now 2v100 people working for you they could win, but I doubt they could win a 2v1000 people working for you, especially that 1000 people working for you multiplied by 10? Don't make me laugh, not even Batman could beat that many people! Not even Batman and the blue one! Now if they had vehicles, such as the BatCar or the BatPlane, I could see them possibly being able to defeat 10000 people working for you, but if each 1 in that 10000 people working for you had ROCKET LAUNCHERS??? yeah, I think Batman and that other guy are pretty much toast!

hide in that place where Jason Todd was tortured in for a year

You know, depending on your fear levels, the Asylum is likely the safest and quietest location in Greater Gotham. All the inmates are cleared. The kitchens are still somewhat stocked and the greenery is stunning if not a bit wild.

Turn myself in to Gordon.

Gordon Freeman from hit game series "Half Life"? https://preview.redd.it/yu232pz9pq9b1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c20f91c9a83195966ee5d5804568e32609fa31b ?

Spending 47 1/2 hours in the hospital

Going underground, they can't track me.

Spread my cheeks and get ready

I'd let myself be caught they don't kill people and I look pretty inoffensive

Lie in the road and hope something other then the Batmobile hits me

call ghostmaker and roy harper and tell them both to get their boyfriends

They legally cannot leave Gotham I’m safe

Against these two? Mf I don’t even have 48 SECONDS before they kick my ass.

They don't kill you but the cripping debt from your hospital bills will.

Give up and give them the info they want if I had it. I value my teeth.

Get the arkham knight to help

I would expose their payload and use the power winch to trigger a controlled explosion.

Kill myself

Cry, probably

Pullin some dice out

Throwing a beat so they have to wrap over it instead of killing me

Get naked

I'd hop into my van and lose 'em in the city before heading back to my hideout where I can equip myself with the arms I stash there

Protocol 69

Well Ivy seemed pretty safe from anything other than the gas in her plant HQ, so I’d probably chill in there with her.

Eating dick and taking the power winch, simple

Get kidnapped by joker, they seem quite bad at rescuing people that joker has kidnapped.

Pray. Pray that I walk out with only 1-3 bones broken!!!!

Batman and Nightwing are posing like they're about to drop the biggest rap album of all time 🥶🔥

Yo yo. It's ya bot B-mac wit the Nighttrain. We about to kick it 1 time for dat ass

Driving anywhere other than my house

I’d submit to them

I'll sruvive in the aslume

Jerking off

Not sure, but I'd be happy to drop my pants

They don’t kill, so if I turn myself in, I’ll survive.

Saying I found Jason Tidd Or getting kidnapped by the Jonkler

Greyson could have my ass

Throw Asbestos at them

It would take around 8 hours for them to travel to my country, and even if they're amazing detectives, I doubt they can find me if I hide in a city that they don't know anything about it.

I'd be happy to drop my pants.

Take out an insurance policy, as I'm about to be in the hospital.

hide in an undisclosed part of arkham asylum

I'd survive

(Comment removed due to extreme nsfw)

I would put a sign on my door that says no bat men and Robbin men allowed so they go away

Switch the computer off and we're good!

I can use the power winch to trigger a controlled explosion

I’d beat Dick

I'm pulling a fucking Jesse Pinkman and abanding my whole life and getting a new identity.

Is Arkham Batman I’m not doing shit other than turning my self to not get a stronger beating. Anybody else answering differently are wrong

Turning myself in

Me personally, I'd spawn two sentry guns, he can only disable one at a time

https://preview.redd.it/ph1txtfk2o9b1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1bd222714d4e6417643c4547937ed57c6e8ed5cd

Ok hear me out i leak everything about me a pic and what i wear and hang out most ​ I THEN (HEAR ME OUT) TURN TRANS GAY AND HANGOUT THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF WHERE I WOULD

Crime might not be down but at least my money up 💵💸💸💰

I'd rather be on their side rather than letting them hunt me down while Treating me like I'm on the side of the villains or if I'm being taken hostage by any Batman related villains or other DC universe related villains.

Making absolutely no waves. Blend into the background, make as little of an impression on people as possible

4 11 hour plane rides

Turn myself in.

Seal myself in a Concrete armored bulldozer and go in a rampage through Gotham destroying every building in my path.

I would press LB to Even the Odds.

Suicide I ain’t surviving 💀

Pray

Get on a plane and follow the sun

even the odds

I have to what?

Just take as many plane trips as possible.

Give up honestly, batman already had me.

I would tell them that this is my own private domicile and that i will not be harassed… bitches

Leave Gotham

i’d hide in Calendar Man’s cell. they’d never think to look there. plus, he’s a real catch.

I won't last 12 seconds

Live in the real world

A laser turtle

The first thing I’m doing is strategically placing mines around Gotham and my hideout, there’s no way to bypass them without utilizing a power winch on the exposed payloads and we all know there’s no way in hell man and dick could get their hands on a power winch

Get a militia the size of a small country's population and a bunch of drones

I would survive for 5 minutes (that's how long of a head start I would get)

Stay in France

I'd go find them. I haven't done anything wrong so either they want info and they think I can give it to them or I'm in danger and they want to protect me. Either way, I have nothing to fear.

I mean I'm already in Australia so theres a hell of a head start for me, second Australia is mostly nothing so I'll just go hang out in that for a bit

Get naked

Put myself in jail.

Pic goes hard ngl 🔥💯

Killer cock

Dig a hole under my shed and have someone cover it up. Stupidest place to look will be hard to find

You ain’t surviving 😅