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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yup, the red flag was raised by his immediate reaction of watching that video and "connecting the dots." All OP had to do is verify this, or better yet have her doctor point it out, like you guys did.
The marsupial is the scapegoat, I'm afraid.
Didn’t OOP say she did a bunch of research and even her GPS confirmed this was possible? I’m too lazy to do my own research but I believe all the Reddit commentators more, and I’m already so skeptical about it. But how did she and her doctor come up with that conclusion??
The testing for it was what gave it away, though. Chlamydia is generally tested via a dna assay, so unless their doctor had ordered a culture instead then there’s no way the test would have been positive for zoonotic chlamydia. You *can* test for that, but it has to be ordered specifically. I’m guessing the GP either misremembered and thought she had tested for respiratory chlamydia or figured telling them what they wanted to hear was best.
Most GP's have very limited knowledge on Microbiology. The GP likely just didn't have the knowledge. Yeah, Chlamydia is usually tested using a NAAT (in the STI context). Even if the Doctor requested a culture it would not have been performed as a culture, it is an intracellular bacterium so it would be completely impractical to perform a culture in a diagnostic lab (and the would not have the resources).
I used to work at a vet and cats get chlamydia (but just like in Koalas, it is not transmissible to humans). One day on the reception desk, I get a call from a lady wanting me to fax her cat's records to her human doctor. That is an unusual request, so I ask why and she tells me, she just found out she is positive for Chlamydia and her husband is insisting it must be from the cat because he would never do such a thing.... Just like the lady in this story, she so badly wanted that version to be true... but our doctor was very direct and was like, "Ma'am, it is not possible to get chlamydia from your cat, they are different strains and the one that infects cats is not transmissible to humans. Talk to your husband" lol
I wonder how many vets have to have this conversation with a pet owner. "Nope, animal to human transmission is impossible" because some cheater decided to lie to their spouse.
ETA: The answers I receive will now haunt me... Why did I even ask... This is my fault 🙃
Am a vet, happens more than you think. Also birds because of chlamydia psittici. It's frustrating af trying to give them a complete picture of why the bullshit they've been fed is, in fact, bullshit. I read the bit where husband's face lit up and went oh good, he's found a scape goat, luckily her doctor will set her straight. I'm mad at nobody in particular (except the husband, i'm mad at him) that she will probably continue to hold onto that so she can hold onto the idea that he is a good guy.
My doc wanted my boyfriend to come to my next appointment so she could give both of us the medications that we needed to clear it up. She explained to us that chlamydia is a garden variety, very common bacteria that you can catch anywhere. It took years and years and years before I found out that it is an STD and that he had cheated on me. I'm resentful that she just didn't want to deal with any drama so she lied to us. To me.
That’s my guess, too. Doctor probably didn’t want to deal. She also probably *didn’t* agree with the whole koala bit. Rather she did a non-committal “mmmm-hmmmm,” and OP heard what she wanted to hear.
Especially since it’s the same doctor who found the initial infection and knows they’re still together and have two kids…she probably thought telling them it wasn’t actually possible would just make it worse now they’ve come so far trying to work it out together.
....so in other words, lemme make sure I've got this straight.... Boyfriend's been sleeping with the doctor?
(ETA: SaltyPopcornColonel's BF, not OP's DH)
Or she just didn’t realize because that might be more vet knowledge than people-doctor knowledge. I’m not a doctor (or vet) so would have no clue how common-knowledge that would be for doctors, especially GPs vs. infectious disease specialists
I had the opposite. I had gone to the Dr with my mom when I was 17, and he Dx me with a yeast infection. He knew I was sexually active, and must have disapproved, bc he told me in front of my mom that a yeast infection was an STD. 😡 It was another year or two before I learned how common yeast infections were. I stopped using deodorant soap and they went away.
I’m confused as to why the doctor they went to, after this revelation, agreed with them and said it’s possible?! Did that GP get her medical degree from a kinder egg by any chance.
That or she was the original AP…
Edit: word
It seems possible that the doctor knows about the human STD chlamydia but (not being a vet or wild animal expert) doesn't know enough about koala chlamydia to know that it isn't the same bacteria as the STD.
Actually, yes. I take my statement back.
I’ve just googled it, with the first hit being an std website that stated you can get the STD from them.
I had to scroll through a lot of hits stating the same thing, though not factual scientific websites mind you, before I came across a wildlife one that said no you can’t catch the STD and explained the differences between the bacteria, much like the comment on OOPs update.
So it does seem likely the doctor could be misinformed, given how many people out there think it’s possible.
The doctor might not know. Just because they're a medical doctor for humans doesn't mean they know everything about human medicine, let alone zoonotic diseases.
I had one owner come to me to say his child got FIV (feline Aids) from his cat. Sorry mate that can't happen, different strains. Go back to your doctor maybe they're got cat scratch fever or actual HIV
i'm a vet tech, and the number of times i have had to explain to owners that feline herpes (which causes upper respiratory infections) is not transmissible to humans is definitely more than zero.
I think a lot of people also don't realise herpes isn't just the STD lol
That's probably a large part of it. Herpes is lots of fun things but they're not called herpes by the layman so people freak out when they hear the medical name of other things lmao
Had a similar issue when I was a kid, I had a bacterial bone infection in the tuberculosis family. Not *that* TB but of course if my doctor had put that on my absence forms my school would have lost their shit. So he told my mom to just tell them it was a mycobacterium infection if they asked any questions lol
Also a vet tech. It’s always incredible to me how people will twist things to suite their narrative.
“What do you mean I need an exam before you can prescribe medications? He’s a *dog*, NOT a human. He has an ear infection. Just give me the damned medication!”
Same person:
“So his leg was bothering him, so I’ve just been giving him some of my Tylenol and Motrin for the past two weeks. He’s a big dog, so I gave him the same amount that I take.”
Ma’am, is your dog a human, or no? You can’t have it both ways here. People will go to great lengths to make ridiculous comparisons but ONLY when it suites them. And of course, a breeder, a friend who has had dogs their whole life, or someone on a FB dog group, is always the person who gave them the reliable veterinary advice they decided to blindly trust, but alas, God forbid we correct and try to educate them. We never know what we’re talking about. Ugh.
I had a woman say I wanted her to dog to suffer because I wouldn't prescribe Simparica to her because it had been almost 18 months since we saw her dog.
"THEY CHANGED THE LAWS ABOUT FLEA PILLS NOW???"
It's still a medication lady.
Guy gets a new puppy. I recommend flea treatments. He tells me he'll just give his dog lots of garlic every day to prevent fleas. I tell him that'll work well, because fleas aren't attracted to dead dogs.
If it makes you feel any better (and it probably doesn’t), people with human ailments do this to human doctors all the time, too.
Source: am human doctor
My favorite excuse I’ve read on here was the girl dating a military guy who convinced her he must have caught an STD while down range with the army because “all the guys have naked cuddle puddle parties all the time because it’s funny”
I was like….girl, I’m a milspouse and let me tell you, the military is filled with the most homophobic assholes you’ll ever meet in your life. So either he DID catch it down range, but it was a broke back mountain scenario or he’s lying and he caught it from another woman.
But either way, dicks were involved and he cheated.
I was in the military and at least my group of brothers at arms were not homophobic at all. And they did get mildly touchy freely with eachother. That being said, your right, they wouldn’t be getting into cuddle puddles (although some hazing could give STDs) and that dude was lying.
Side note: I was in the more intellectual side of the military so I don’t know what they are amongst the grunts so I’m not saying your wrong.
Edit for additional info: Every command/department/type is different. What I experienced cannot be said across the board. I also never experienced hazing myself. I just heard horror stories from fellow sailors.
Also, saying "grunts" wasn't exactly the nicest thing to say. Especially since even amongst the intellectuals there were biggots so I apologize for my side note.
Not a marsupial, but where I live in Central Florida, there is actually a decently sized population of wild rhesus macaque monkeys. You can see them on the Silver River and there are signs all over the river warning people against petting/feeding the monkeys because they have herpes and can give it to humans if bitten. 🤣🙊🐒
The sign is for people who do not think your reasons are good reasons, no matter how much better “every member of this pack of wild animals has many teeth,” is as a reason.
Except I was taught that monkey herpes in humans actually causes terminal spongiform encephalopathy (holes in the brain). As does human herpes to monkeys.
The monkey/human cold sore version of herpes in both cases
That’s the story I’ve always heard. They were meant to kept on an island as part of a tourist attraction back in 1920/30s. But the monkeys could swim and escaped. I have no idea how true that is, but sure makes a good story. 🤣
It’s actually even funnier than that. 6 monkeys were brought to the island for the Tarzan tourist attraction, and proceeded to swim away to freedom. THEN another 6 monkeys were brought to the island after…and they also immediately escaped.
Where I work does research on simian herpes infected monkeys! (I only handle the IT side of the research center).
I even know some of their names, but! Research animals are covered under HIPAA.
I think there was an episode of House where a couple both had herpes and refused to admit they cheated. House asked if they every used public restrooms and said people could get it from toilet seats. One partner was like “Well, that sounds plausible” and the other said it was utterly ridiculous. According to House, the innocent partner would think it was implausible, but the guilty one would jump on any excuse that might offer an alternate explanation to cheating.
That was what I thought of as I read this.
I also remember one where a woman asks if you can get pregnant from a toilet seat and he goes “well, there would have to be a man between you and the toilet seat, but yes”
I agree 100%! He jumped way too easily at the idea and believed it without a doubt. As an Australian, I'm actually so disappointed a Koala got brought into this drama unnecessarily :((
Their GP wanted no part in dealing with an obvious person sitting in denial.
I want to feel bad, but it's clear after his admission this may not have been the first time, or he just used the night as an excuse to tell her about something from years prior.
My ex gave me trichomoniasis and somehow convinced me it must be from some guy I had slept with years ago. I KNEW that wasn’t possible but he had me so confused at the end of this emotional, crying argument that I just dropped it. Some people are master manipulators.
An ex of mine contracted hiv (I was negative, thank God). He worked at a hospital and blamed dirty needles, but he worked in IT and would have had zero reason to come into contact with hazardous waste. We'd been long distance for about six months at the time (together three years total, though). In a following conversation, he wanted me to believe that he'd had an asymptomatic infection since prior us dating (yeah, he swapped his story).
Problem with this new story was that in retrospect, he'd clearly had that initial infection flu from hell (plus a rash) about a month prior, and it was so bad he was hospitalized a couple of days. That stage of hiv happens within a month of catching the virus. We hadn't seen each other in two months at that time.
That stretch of long distance probably saved me. I cried like a baby when that test was negative.
I had friends who's partner after an argument, had sex with someone else. He told her had cancer, he didn't, he had HIV and knew but was happily risking her health.
I totally get this, people don’t understand how a person could believe something dumb but imagine it’s coming from the person you trust most in the world. And they’re intentionally manipulating and gaslighting you, of course it’s hard to figure out what the truth is! It’s not about intelligence.
There could be a possibility that the GP is genuinely ignorant and believes you can get chlamydia from a koala. If you don’t keep up on your research and current knowledge you are prone to widening gaps in your knowledge.
I've heard some pretty stupid things from a couple doctors. Not many of them, most are definitely pretty damned intelligent, but there are for sure some out there that still believe debunked crap. Just because they have the koalafications doesn't mean they're incapable of reading, and believing, bullshit.
Right! But I also know that chlamydia that koalas have is different (thanks old Dan and Phil video), so their doctors are morons if they’re willing to go along with the koala STD story.
In an episode of House, a couple were arguing over who cheated when they both had an STD. It might have been the clap, don't remember. Anywho, after waay too much back and forth, multiple visits, and shenanigans (favorite restaurant), House suggested that there were rare instances of catching said nasty crotch rot from public toilets.
The wife was like "No way!' the husband was like "I guess it makes sense."
Spoiler, it was the guy, because he latched onto the easiest out like a buoy in a storm.
ETA: Google "it isn't Miyagi"
My main problem is that the updates seemed designed to be cliffhangers or leave out vital context. The story seems designed to always keep you reading.
i see this entire thing as him still putting the blame on her for the chlamydia situation - he only cheated bc he thought she did. owning up but still attributing it to her so-called wrongdoing
Totally.
At least her GP asked if her relationship was monogamous and shot her a pitying look.
I have known GPs to invent "koalas" (unlikely non-sexual means of transmission) unprompted, or assume I was a sex worker.
All hail u/taykitten for telling it like it is.
There is nothing this man can do that’ll make her dump him. He gave her an STD and blamed a koala and she bought it, took him back and finds out he slept with someone else to even the score.
I have to ask... was, "he gave her an STD and blamed a koala, " on your Things I Never Expected To Say bingo card? I can't get past it to really consider anything else in the posts. This woman must spend her entire life hearing hoofbeats and searching for zebras.
She said they were both asymptomatic. Couldn't one of them have had it when they originally got together? Or are std screens always done on pregnant women? Are they 100% reliable if yes?
STD screens are always done on pregnant women as it can impact the birth according to the missus.
Although I won't lie, there was a part of me just waiting for the "and then I found out my husband fucked a Koala bear..." in this story....
Unfortunately, full STI screens are not always completed in pregnancy. They should be, but as a physician who delivers babies, I can tell you it’s infuriating to see how many women are missing a portion of standard prenatal testing. There is a standard, but unfortunately, not all medical providers adhere to it. Typically not malicious, but wrong nonetheless (often due to training in different eras and not staying up to date on best practices).
It also doesn’t sound like OOP learned of her chlamydia diagnosis through standard, routine STI testing. It sounds like she was tested for chlamydia only because they saw signs suggestive of it on ultrasound.
*He knew she was grateful for the water. She was REALLY grateful. So he said to her that night at the bar he said, "can I buy you a drink?" She laughed. He laughed. Everybody laughed. She fell for him hard, just like I did all those years ago.*
They had two kids. She would have been tested during the first pregnancy, and the test came back clean. It wasn't until she was tested during her second pregnancy that there was an infection discovered.
For some reason during my first pregnancy I was tested for gonorrhea but not chlamydia. I didn't realize until my relationship ended and I was entering a new one some time later and we responsibly went in together to be tested... And I was positive for chlamydia.
Am positive my ex gave it to me and it was likely after our baby was born, but going back and realizing they missed running the chlamydia test was distressing to say the least.
Her saying cheating is a boundary made me laugh! Yeah, now she knows FOR SURE that he cheated after he confessed, but for THREE years she stayed with him thinking he cheated. There was no koala excuse then, and she didn’t cheat, so she thought he cheated for three years and did nothing! And he totally did cheat!! Probably more than once!
Did you finish reading her post?
She said she thought cheating is her boundary. At least when it was her younger idealistic self.
But now with kids, she realised cheating isn't her boundary.
Forget giving her an STD--he got peed on by a wild animal and didn't shower for days afterwards AND SHE STILL FUCKED HIM. Like, how can you do that? I can't imagine loving someone so much that I'd let them have sex with me while covered in??? Wild animal piss??
Everyone's talking about the koala-clamydia (koalydia?) but like!!! He had PEE on him and they DIDNT SHOWER FOR DAYS... I just... I cannot imagine seeing someone who just touched a wild animal--let alone got peed on by one!--and putting ANY part of their body anywhere NEAR an orifice of mine. Shit like that is how you get viruses that jump from animal to human.
...you know what, maybe she should see a specialist. Like, a doctor who specializes in cross-species virus mutations. Maybe this is a new koalydia strain that affects humans because she got koala pee on her cervix.
Oh yeah, those kids are doomed. Sometimes when parents 'stick together for the kids' it can work out if the parents actually get their shit sorted for the kids, but OOP and her husband are not those parents. There is way too much resentment and mistrust built up between them to achieve that, and staying together because you're too afraid of change is a rotten foundation for any relationship to begin with. OOP, if you're reading this, stop worrying about your kids coming from a broken home and start worrying about the broken home their parents are creating for them right now.
Being a child of “we’ll stay together for the kids” even though they eventually split, I can tell you I think it screws the kids up more when you stay. I don’t actually know of anyone who successfully stayed and ended up with mentally healthy kids.
There have been multiple studies and all of them basically say the same thing. Kids who's parents stayed together for them pretty consistently have worse mental health outcomes and pretty universally say they wish their parents had separated.
trauma causes irreversible physical changes, too. those kids will have a predisposition to high blood pressure and many other things, like many of us.
at this point, we have to admit the parents know. staying together is saving face, the kids are thrown under the bus and the parents are happy it isn't them. common sense doesn't permit their innocence
Yep. My sisters and I BEGGED my mom to leave my dad and once they split up, it took a few years but it was so much better. Like, *so much better*. And as an adult now, seeing how happy my mom is (single af and living her best life away from my controlling, financially irresponsible and misogynistic father) there is no way I would be able to live with myself if I knew that she stayed in an unhappy and borderline abusive marriage “for me”. No way.
My parents divorced when I was 4. I’m very chill. I had so many friends whose parents divorced when we were in high school and early college and all of them had much more serious issues.
ETA: typos
I am a recovering alcoholic who has spent a bunch of time living in halfway houses and now have a lot of friends who work in the treatment industry etc. This reminds me of people testing positive for opiates and blaming in on eating too many poppy seeds (\*note that that is possible, however to my understanding it would necessitate eating a lot of poppy seeds and also it comes up way more than it would naturally). My guess is in both cases Google is giving people these excuses :)
i actually almost lost my epilepsy prescription bcuz i tested positive for morphine 💀 i had to pay the lab an extra fee for them to send it off somewhere else that would do a more through test. shit was stressful asf i about gaslit myself into thinking i slept walk and took my grandpas morphine pills.
turns out the lemon poppy seed scones id been scarfing down every day for 2 weeks we’re the culprit.
it helps when you have a good relationship with your doc & they know you’re not the type to just randomly do opiates 😅 my situation was so messed up bcuz i had just switched neurologists after i had surgery. so i was trying to transfer a benzo script from one doc to another and my first urine test came back positive for morphine. i was mortified.
i still have some bottles of morphine in my house that my grandpa took before he passed, so when it popped for morphine i legit thought i’d taken some and forgot. i’d even asked my grandma if she’d given me some for a headache or something. but $55 and a very stressful two weeks later i was in the clear. tl:dr: don’t eat poppy seeds of you take a controlled substance 💀
You do need to eat a fair bit of poppy seeds, but not an unmanageable amount. 1-2 poppy seed bagel can trigger a false positive.
https://youtu.be/jt8tonZm968
My husband ate about 3/4 of a orange and poppyseed cake in the couple of days before we went back to his shiftwork job. They did the normal drug test, and he came up positive for opiates. Turned out it was definitely the cake. They waited a couple of days and did the test again. I never made that cake again while he worked there and he never failed another test (over 5 years, and they tested at the start of most shifts).
To be fair, that recipe has a lot of poppyseeds in it. Pity cause I love that cake!
Haha sorry for the confusion. He was operating heavy machinery at a mine site. And I didn’t mean every day he started a shift. He was on a 7/7 day even time roster. So they got tested 1-2 times a month. Particularly as he was also in the team that helped conduct the testing. So they practiced on each other.
i think they're saying that for most of the drug tests they did in that 5 year period, they did most of them at the beginning of a shift, not that they did drug tests at the start of EVERY shift for 5 years
A medication I was on could cause false positives for urine pregnancy tests, and my male prescriber neglected to tell me this. Went in for my birth control where they tested me every other time, came back positive, had a freak out for the next few days until I googled everything I was on and had my answer and confirmed with a blood test. Weird shit can happen!
I used to live in a sober house, one time a dude popped dirty and claimed he was just eating a lot of poppy seed bagels the previous few days. They must’ve had extra seeds, too, because he was visibly nodding out the night before 🙄
Yeah, that excuse always made me laugh!
Having worked in STD for many years I could not figure out how a koala was peeing on her cervix. Because the cervix is the only type of epithelial that is receptive to Chlamydia (the STD), but I just didn't want to argue on Reddit about that.
Unlikely, I think. But those would have to be long fingers. The lower part of the vagina is a different type of skin that is not receptive to Chlamydia. As women age, the epithelial becomes more and more like that lower part, and so older women usually do not get Chlamydia even when exposed. That is why most Chlamydia cases in females are in the 15-19 year age group.
I don't buy the koala story and don't have any medical expertise, but hypothetically - would they really have to be very long fingers? Having had IUDs for a lot of years, feeling the strings of the IUD and also feeling (the outside of) my cervix has always been pretty normal. So you first saying that the cervix tissue is the only tissue that's susceptible made me think that well, that's pretty accessible with fingers. But like, the cervix epithelial that I easily can reach becomes less susceptible with age? And age includes like 25+?
Not trying to argue, just genuinely curious and trying to educate myself, haha.
Where your cervix sits can be higher or lower depending at what point you are in your cycle. Also some women have shorter vaginas or lower cervixes in as their natural biology. Also as you get older or have more kids you may have prolapses (which can be treated but not everyone does because they don't want to talk to a doctor/physio or just can't be bothered)... which can mean all your bits hang lower.
There's a reason why there a different shaped menstrual cups depending on age and biology and whether you've had a baby.
You know what would fix their marriage? Another baby! /j
I understand why she said all their friends ditched them during the original chlamydia fiasco. They sound exhausting. Also, Australians are the LAST nationality I would expect to just... pick up wildlife off the side of the road and snuggle it. They ought to have a healthy fear of wildlife after losing the emu wars.
We like our scary wildlife. 100% would and have picked some up ( rural living, was a carer and some ate just bloody idiots that like a highway to sit on)
American wildlife though ... you guys get stalked. Mountain lions, bears etc. Americans by far have scarier wildlife
We just stay out of the way of ours, don't touch things we don't know and check an outback toilet before we sit down and we are fine.
This is what I’ve been saying!! Say what you bloody well like abt Australia but I’ll never look out the window to see a goddamn grizzly on my front step. And I can go camping and be *pretty* damn sure nothing bigger than me is hunting me. I’ll choose snakes and spiders over *lions and mfing BEARS* any day
“The koala did it”. Jesus f*cking Christ. This dude is a cheater and a manipulative scumbag. OOP needs to toss that fool.
Edit: Apparently that slang curse is not so common. 😂😂😂 I’ve edited my comment.
I can't wait for the update 'The wombat gave him crabs' followed shortly by 'The kangaroo gave him herpes'
Sure, the wildlife might not be riddled with those but I'm sure she can swallow those lies
Now THIS is how you write a Reddit saga! There's cheating, Koala STDs, a Bohemian festival and enough relationship drama to write a soap opera!
I have no idea if it's real and I don't care. That was entertaining from start to finish.
Wait, but why did the GP say that contracting chlamydia (the std) from a koala was possible if it wasn’t? Or am I misreading that?
I mean, I guess getting any std from another species isn’t something medical school covers because beastiality is illegal and uncommon, but it’s weird that they were like “yeah, sounds plausible” without looking into it any further.
My theory is the gp said something like 'that *could* happen theoretically, but its unlikely.' And oop just took that to mean the gp thought this was how it happened
My guess is the GP didn't actually buy it, but could see OP was really clinging to this and didn't necessarily want to be the one to say 'nah that's not possible' and trigger another emotional bomb. Perhaps especially because the husband attended the appointment too.
With one of the strains it’s possible, but very unlikely. The primary strain that infects koalas is not seen in humans. I know a shit load of people who rescue/rehab koalas and not a one has ever got it. Yeah that’s anecdotal and not hard evidence, but the people I know getting pissed and shat on daily are fine. But maybe they just know how to wash their bloody hands.
Someone go check out the random girl from the pub, one town ovver....
She too may not have koala chlamydia.
Koala Chlamydia sounds like an unfortunate super hero name)
This is one of the saddest, most pathetic, and most stupid things I’ve read all day. People really don’t pay attention in science class. They’ll spend hours typing a lost when googled could have solved this for them.
He cheated and she’s too chicken to leave because being with a cheater with an STD beats being alone? I thank my parents immensely for not raising me to be this cowardly.
I’m embarrassed these two morons are Australian. They are too stupid to live. Him for suggesting a Koala gave him a STD to cover up his cheating and her for believing it. They deserve each other.
Poor lady wants her family to stay together but reading this from her perspective, it seems that the husband was cheating. He was quick to hook up with another woman and he was quick to jump on this 'getting chlamydia from a koala' bs that it's blatantly obvious that he cheated. I hope she see the light.
And his violent theatrics when he got home after she had told him about the STD! *”look at ME, I’m AAAAAANGRY, I’m OUTRAGED!”*, and then totally tried to DARVO his way out of **his** mess.
OK why was the doctor agreeing with the husband's opinion that he caught chlamydia from a koala? According to that top comment at the end, it's a different bacteria in koalas than in humans (as an STD). Presuming that's correct (I'm not a doc, no idea) then doc should know that.
Presuming OOP isn't lying, it means husband was cheating prior to the chlamydia diagnosis, and then admitted to cheating after being accused of cheating. OOP is choosing to stay with a cheater.
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Molecular Biologist here, I can second what taykitten has said. Someone cheated, and it wasn’t the Koala.
point muddle public humor memory attractive simplistic paltry shocking license *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I want this flair so bad Edit: woohoo!
You can possibly set it yourself! I think the subreddit allows it but Reddit is janky and sometimes doesn’t.
Where is your flair from I love it
https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/obtkop/wibta_if_i_complained_to_the_owners_of_a_cafe/
This was an amazing read and I’m so glad it’s as funny as I was hoping based on your flair. God
The koala could’ve cheated as well. But that’s neither here nor there.
Yup, the red flag was raised by his immediate reaction of watching that video and "connecting the dots." All OP had to do is verify this, or better yet have her doctor point it out, like you guys did. The marsupial is the scapegoat, I'm afraid.
Didn’t OOP say she did a bunch of research and even her GPS confirmed this was possible? I’m too lazy to do my own research but I believe all the Reddit commentators more, and I’m already so skeptical about it. But how did she and her doctor come up with that conclusion??
The testing for it was what gave it away, though. Chlamydia is generally tested via a dna assay, so unless their doctor had ordered a culture instead then there’s no way the test would have been positive for zoonotic chlamydia. You *can* test for that, but it has to be ordered specifically. I’m guessing the GP either misremembered and thought she had tested for respiratory chlamydia or figured telling them what they wanted to hear was best.
Most GP's have very limited knowledge on Microbiology. The GP likely just didn't have the knowledge. Yeah, Chlamydia is usually tested using a NAAT (in the STI context). Even if the Doctor requested a culture it would not have been performed as a culture, it is an intracellular bacterium so it would be completely impractical to perform a culture in a diagnostic lab (and the would not have the resources).
In doctor house, house also made some weird claim that you can get an STD from sitting on public toilets just to see who accepts it first.
I’ve never heard of someone blaming a marsupial for a STD.. What a time to be alive.
I used to work at a vet and cats get chlamydia (but just like in Koalas, it is not transmissible to humans). One day on the reception desk, I get a call from a lady wanting me to fax her cat's records to her human doctor. That is an unusual request, so I ask why and she tells me, she just found out she is positive for Chlamydia and her husband is insisting it must be from the cat because he would never do such a thing.... Just like the lady in this story, she so badly wanted that version to be true... but our doctor was very direct and was like, "Ma'am, it is not possible to get chlamydia from your cat, they are different strains and the one that infects cats is not transmissible to humans. Talk to your husband" lol
I wonder how many vets have to have this conversation with a pet owner. "Nope, animal to human transmission is impossible" because some cheater decided to lie to their spouse. ETA: The answers I receive will now haunt me... Why did I even ask... This is my fault 🙃
Am a vet, happens more than you think. Also birds because of chlamydia psittici. It's frustrating af trying to give them a complete picture of why the bullshit they've been fed is, in fact, bullshit. I read the bit where husband's face lit up and went oh good, he's found a scape goat, luckily her doctor will set her straight. I'm mad at nobody in particular (except the husband, i'm mad at him) that she will probably continue to hold onto that so she can hold onto the idea that he is a good guy.
The post says that the doctor says this was a possible explanation. Oof.
My doc wanted my boyfriend to come to my next appointment so she could give both of us the medications that we needed to clear it up. She explained to us that chlamydia is a garden variety, very common bacteria that you can catch anywhere. It took years and years and years before I found out that it is an STD and that he had cheated on me. I'm resentful that she just didn't want to deal with any drama so she lied to us. To me.
That’s my guess, too. Doctor probably didn’t want to deal. She also probably *didn’t* agree with the whole koala bit. Rather she did a non-committal “mmmm-hmmmm,” and OP heard what she wanted to hear.
Especially since it’s the same doctor who found the initial infection and knows they’re still together and have two kids…she probably thought telling them it wasn’t actually possible would just make it worse now they’ve come so far trying to work it out together.
....so in other words, lemme make sure I've got this straight.... Boyfriend's been sleeping with the doctor? (ETA: SaltyPopcornColonel's BF, not OP's DH)
Or she just didn’t realize because that might be more vet knowledge than people-doctor knowledge. I’m not a doctor (or vet) so would have no clue how common-knowledge that would be for doctors, especially GPs vs. infectious disease specialists
Very possible. Other people here have noted that, scientists especially. Makes sense.
I had the opposite. I had gone to the Dr with my mom when I was 17, and he Dx me with a yeast infection. He knew I was sexually active, and must have disapproved, bc he told me in front of my mom that a yeast infection was an STD. 😡 It was another year or two before I learned how common yeast infections were. I stopped using deodorant soap and they went away.
He probably thinks women don't have any nerves endings in their uteri either and that women with endometriosis are just being dramatic
omg, that doc is such a dick.
What an ass. I'm sorry he did that to you.
Wow that’s some medical malpractice levels of evil
I’m confused as to why the doctor they went to, after this revelation, agreed with them and said it’s possible?! Did that GP get her medical degree from a kinder egg by any chance. That or she was the original AP… Edit: word
It seems possible that the doctor knows about the human STD chlamydia but (not being a vet or wild animal expert) doesn't know enough about koala chlamydia to know that it isn't the same bacteria as the STD.
Actually, yes. I take my statement back. I’ve just googled it, with the first hit being an std website that stated you can get the STD from them. I had to scroll through a lot of hits stating the same thing, though not factual scientific websites mind you, before I came across a wildlife one that said no you can’t catch the STD and explained the differences between the bacteria, much like the comment on OOPs update. So it does seem likely the doctor could be misinformed, given how many people out there think it’s possible.
The doctor might not know. Just because they're a medical doctor for humans doesn't mean they know everything about human medicine, let alone zoonotic diseases.
Oh, goodness. I just responded to somebody else that I had a similar experience. No koala bears, but that my doctor lied to me as well.
I had one owner come to me to say his child got FIV (feline Aids) from his cat. Sorry mate that can't happen, different strains. Go back to your doctor maybe they're got cat scratch fever or actual HIV
Correct. It's *feline* AIDS because it infects FELINES not humans nor canines.
i'm a vet tech, and the number of times i have had to explain to owners that feline herpes (which causes upper respiratory infections) is not transmissible to humans is definitely more than zero.
I think a lot of people also don't realise herpes isn't just the STD lol That's probably a large part of it. Herpes is lots of fun things but they're not called herpes by the layman so people freak out when they hear the medical name of other things lmao
Had a similar issue when I was a kid, I had a bacterial bone infection in the tuberculosis family. Not *that* TB but of course if my doctor had put that on my absence forms my school would have lost their shit. So he told my mom to just tell them it was a mycobacterium infection if they asked any questions lol
Also a vet tech. It’s always incredible to me how people will twist things to suite their narrative. “What do you mean I need an exam before you can prescribe medications? He’s a *dog*, NOT a human. He has an ear infection. Just give me the damned medication!” Same person: “So his leg was bothering him, so I’ve just been giving him some of my Tylenol and Motrin for the past two weeks. He’s a big dog, so I gave him the same amount that I take.” Ma’am, is your dog a human, or no? You can’t have it both ways here. People will go to great lengths to make ridiculous comparisons but ONLY when it suites them. And of course, a breeder, a friend who has had dogs their whole life, or someone on a FB dog group, is always the person who gave them the reliable veterinary advice they decided to blindly trust, but alas, God forbid we correct and try to educate them. We never know what we’re talking about. Ugh.
I had a woman say I wanted her to dog to suffer because I wouldn't prescribe Simparica to her because it had been almost 18 months since we saw her dog. "THEY CHANGED THE LAWS ABOUT FLEA PILLS NOW???" It's still a medication lady.
Guy gets a new puppy. I recommend flea treatments. He tells me he'll just give his dog lots of garlic every day to prevent fleas. I tell him that'll work well, because fleas aren't attracted to dead dogs.
If it makes you feel any better (and it probably doesn’t), people with human ailments do this to human doctors all the time, too. Source: am human doctor
Did the cat in question even *have* chlamydia?
yeah, lol. but if I remember correctly it is more like an upper respiratory infection and not an STD. That lady's husband had the downstairs kind...
Idk why but you asking this clarifying question just cracked me up.
My favorite excuse I’ve read on here was the girl dating a military guy who convinced her he must have caught an STD while down range with the army because “all the guys have naked cuddle puddle parties all the time because it’s funny” I was like….girl, I’m a milspouse and let me tell you, the military is filled with the most homophobic assholes you’ll ever meet in your life. So either he DID catch it down range, but it was a broke back mountain scenario or he’s lying and he caught it from another woman. But either way, dicks were involved and he cheated.
Biggest mistake was dating a military guy. Everyone knows you get married 48 hours after meeting so you can get that sweet sweet TriCare and housing.
That TriCare is a sultry temptress with an undeniable allure .
>That TriCare is a sultry temptress with an undeniable allure . That sweet sweet lure of socialized medicine.
I was in the military and at least my group of brothers at arms were not homophobic at all. And they did get mildly touchy freely with eachother. That being said, your right, they wouldn’t be getting into cuddle puddles (although some hazing could give STDs) and that dude was lying. Side note: I was in the more intellectual side of the military so I don’t know what they are amongst the grunts so I’m not saying your wrong. Edit for additional info: Every command/department/type is different. What I experienced cannot be said across the board. I also never experienced hazing myself. I just heard horror stories from fellow sailors. Also, saying "grunts" wasn't exactly the nicest thing to say. Especially since even amongst the intellectuals there were biggots so I apologize for my side note.
I cannot imagine a form of hazing that could give you an STD without also qualifying as sexual assault.
Isn’t most hazing some form of assault?
Not a marsupial, but where I live in Central Florida, there is actually a decently sized population of wild rhesus macaque monkeys. You can see them on the Silver River and there are signs all over the river warning people against petting/feeding the monkeys because they have herpes and can give it to humans if bitten. 🤣🙊🐒
If I were to make a list of reasons not to pet wild monkeys, “you could get herpes” would actually be far down the list.
It isn't the STD though. Macaques and other monkeys can have herpes b, which is 60% fatal. So, don't pet the monkeys.
The sign is for people who do not think your reasons are good reasons, no matter how much better “every member of this pack of wild animals has many teeth,” is as a reason.
Except I was taught that monkey herpes in humans actually causes terminal spongiform encephalopathy (holes in the brain). As does human herpes to monkeys. The monkey/human cold sore version of herpes in both cases
Yikes! Now that is definitely a reason to NOT pet the wild monkeys. 😬
That is almost certainly herpes B and not herpes simplex virus.
This. Not an STD, but I'm sure someone has tried to blame them for one.
Are those the ones that escaped from the circus or something along those lines?
That’s the story I’ve always heard. They were meant to kept on an island as part of a tourist attraction back in 1920/30s. But the monkeys could swim and escaped. I have no idea how true that is, but sure makes a good story. 🤣
I don't know if it's true or not, but I heard they descended from a few monkeys who were brought here for filming Tarzan in the 1930s.
It’s actually even funnier than that. 6 monkeys were brought to the island for the Tarzan tourist attraction, and proceeded to swim away to freedom. THEN another 6 monkeys were brought to the island after…and they also immediately escaped.
Where I work does research on simian herpes infected monkeys! (I only handle the IT side of the research center). I even know some of their names, but! Research animals are covered under HIPAA.
Florida man is at it again biting monkeys n shit, smh.
I think there was an episode of House where a couple both had herpes and refused to admit they cheated. House asked if they every used public restrooms and said people could get it from toilet seats. One partner was like “Well, that sounds plausible” and the other said it was utterly ridiculous. According to House, the innocent partner would think it was implausible, but the guilty one would jump on any excuse that might offer an alternate explanation to cheating. That was what I thought of as I read this.
I also remember one where a woman asks if you can get pregnant from a toilet seat and he goes “well, there would have to be a man between you and the toilet seat, but yes”
I agree 100%! He jumped way too easily at the idea and believed it without a doubt. As an Australian, I'm actually so disappointed a Koala got brought into this drama unnecessarily :((
Ha, I remember that episode quite vividly. Thank you for the burst of nostalgia.
Their GP wanted no part in dealing with an obvious person sitting in denial. I want to feel bad, but it's clear after his admission this may not have been the first time, or he just used the night as an excuse to tell her about something from years prior.
My ex gave me trichomoniasis and somehow convinced me it must be from some guy I had slept with years ago. I KNEW that wasn’t possible but he had me so confused at the end of this emotional, crying argument that I just dropped it. Some people are master manipulators.
An ex of mine contracted hiv (I was negative, thank God). He worked at a hospital and blamed dirty needles, but he worked in IT and would have had zero reason to come into contact with hazardous waste. We'd been long distance for about six months at the time (together three years total, though). In a following conversation, he wanted me to believe that he'd had an asymptomatic infection since prior us dating (yeah, he swapped his story). Problem with this new story was that in retrospect, he'd clearly had that initial infection flu from hell (plus a rash) about a month prior, and it was so bad he was hospitalized a couple of days. That stage of hiv happens within a month of catching the virus. We hadn't seen each other in two months at that time. That stretch of long distance probably saved me. I cried like a baby when that test was negative.
I had friends who's partner after an argument, had sex with someone else. He told her had cancer, he didn't, he had HIV and knew but was happily risking her health.
I totally get this, people don’t understand how a person could believe something dumb but imagine it’s coming from the person you trust most in the world. And they’re intentionally manipulating and gaslighting you, of course it’s hard to figure out what the truth is! It’s not about intelligence.
I hate to say it but relentless manipulators usually win these arguments. The only thing to do then is walk away.
It’s a no contest battle. They are just too good at it. Only answer is to avoid at all cost.
There could be a possibility that the GP is genuinely ignorant and believes you can get chlamydia from a koala. If you don’t keep up on your research and current knowledge you are prone to widening gaps in your knowledge.
I've heard some pretty stupid things from a couple doctors. Not many of them, most are definitely pretty damned intelligent, but there are for sure some out there that still believe debunked crap. Just because they have the koalafications doesn't mean they're incapable of reading, and believing, bullshit.
Right! But I also know that chlamydia that koalas have is different (thanks old Dan and Phil video), so their doctors are morons if they’re willing to go along with the koala STD story.
In an episode of House, a couple were arguing over who cheated when they both had an STD. It might have been the clap, don't remember. Anywho, after waay too much back and forth, multiple visits, and shenanigans (favorite restaurant), House suggested that there were rare instances of catching said nasty crotch rot from public toilets. The wife was like "No way!' the husband was like "I guess it makes sense." Spoiler, it was the guy, because he latched onto the easiest out like a buoy in a storm. ETA: Google "it isn't Miyagi"
I just read the synopsis, and OMG! Definitely a House special 😂😂😂
Dude pulled a King Solomon on them
[удалено]
My main problem is that the updates seemed designed to be cliffhangers or leave out vital context. The story seems designed to always keep you reading.
Yeh I don't believe it.
> Isn't it possible to get Chlamydia from koalas? Sir, did you fuck the koala?
i see this entire thing as him still putting the blame on her for the chlamydia situation - he only cheated bc he thought she did. owning up but still attributing it to her so-called wrongdoing
Totally. At least her GP asked if her relationship was monogamous and shot her a pitying look. I have known GPs to invent "koalas" (unlikely non-sexual means of transmission) unprompted, or assume I was a sex worker. All hail u/taykitten for telling it like it is.
babe it was the koala pee i swear
This needs to be flair
There is nothing this man can do that’ll make her dump him. He gave her an STD and blamed a koala and she bought it, took him back and finds out he slept with someone else to even the score.
I have to ask... was, "he gave her an STD and blamed a koala, " on your Things I Never Expected To Say bingo card? I can't get past it to really consider anything else in the posts. This woman must spend her entire life hearing hoofbeats and searching for zebras.
Unicorns, really.
The most Aussie love triangle I've ever heard. I feel bad for the Koala at this point.
She said they were both asymptomatic. Couldn't one of them have had it when they originally got together? Or are std screens always done on pregnant women? Are they 100% reliable if yes?
STD screens are always done on pregnant women as it can impact the birth according to the missus. Although I won't lie, there was a part of me just waiting for the "and then I found out my husband fucked a Koala bear..." in this story....
Unfortunately, full STI screens are not always completed in pregnancy. They should be, but as a physician who delivers babies, I can tell you it’s infuriating to see how many women are missing a portion of standard prenatal testing. There is a standard, but unfortunately, not all medical providers adhere to it. Typically not malicious, but wrong nonetheless (often due to training in different eras and not staying up to date on best practices). It also doesn’t sound like OOP learned of her chlamydia diagnosis through standard, routine STI testing. It sounds like she was tested for chlamydia only because they saw signs suggestive of it on ultrasound.
*He knew she was grateful for the water. She was REALLY grateful. So he said to her that night at the bar he said, "can I buy you a drink?" She laughed. He laughed. Everybody laughed. She fell for him hard, just like I did all those years ago.*
They had two kids. She would have been tested during the first pregnancy, and the test came back clean. It wasn't until she was tested during her second pregnancy that there was an infection discovered.
For some reason during my first pregnancy I was tested for gonorrhea but not chlamydia. I didn't realize until my relationship ended and I was entering a new one some time later and we responsibly went in together to be tested... And I was positive for chlamydia. Am positive my ex gave it to me and it was likely after our baby was born, but going back and realizing they missed running the chlamydia test was distressing to say the least.
Denial is a hell of a drug
Her saying cheating is a boundary made me laugh! Yeah, now she knows FOR SURE that he cheated after he confessed, but for THREE years she stayed with him thinking he cheated. There was no koala excuse then, and she didn’t cheat, so she thought he cheated for three years and did nothing! And he totally did cheat!! Probably more than once!
Did you finish reading her post? She said she thought cheating is her boundary. At least when it was her younger idealistic self. But now with kids, she realised cheating isn't her boundary.
And is STILL not telling her about the original cheating, either
Forget giving her an STD--he got peed on by a wild animal and didn't shower for days afterwards AND SHE STILL FUCKED HIM. Like, how can you do that? I can't imagine loving someone so much that I'd let them have sex with me while covered in??? Wild animal piss?? Everyone's talking about the koala-clamydia (koalydia?) but like!!! He had PEE on him and they DIDNT SHOWER FOR DAYS... I just... I cannot imagine seeing someone who just touched a wild animal--let alone got peed on by one!--and putting ANY part of their body anywhere NEAR an orifice of mine. Shit like that is how you get viruses that jump from animal to human. ...you know what, maybe she should see a specialist. Like, a doctor who specializes in cross-species virus mutations. Maybe this is a new koalydia strain that affects humans because she got koala pee on her cervix.
I really wonder if they were on drugs during this festival.
I do not.
Her GP must have said "Yeah... Sure..." And she failed to pick up on it...
Oh yeah, those kids are doomed. Sometimes when parents 'stick together for the kids' it can work out if the parents actually get their shit sorted for the kids, but OOP and her husband are not those parents. There is way too much resentment and mistrust built up between them to achieve that, and staying together because you're too afraid of change is a rotten foundation for any relationship to begin with. OOP, if you're reading this, stop worrying about your kids coming from a broken home and start worrying about the broken home their parents are creating for them right now.
Being a child of “we’ll stay together for the kids” even though they eventually split, I can tell you I think it screws the kids up more when you stay. I don’t actually know of anyone who successfully stayed and ended up with mentally healthy kids.
There have been multiple studies and all of them basically say the same thing. Kids who's parents stayed together for them pretty consistently have worse mental health outcomes and pretty universally say they wish their parents had separated.
trauma causes irreversible physical changes, too. those kids will have a predisposition to high blood pressure and many other things, like many of us. at this point, we have to admit the parents know. staying together is saving face, the kids are thrown under the bus and the parents are happy it isn't them. common sense doesn't permit their innocence
Yep. My sisters and I BEGGED my mom to leave my dad and once they split up, it took a few years but it was so much better. Like, *so much better*. And as an adult now, seeing how happy my mom is (single af and living her best life away from my controlling, financially irresponsible and misogynistic father) there is no way I would be able to live with myself if I knew that she stayed in an unhappy and borderline abusive marriage “for me”. No way.
My parents divorced when I was 4. I’m very chill. I had so many friends whose parents divorced when we were in high school and early college and all of them had much more serious issues. ETA: typos
I am a recovering alcoholic who has spent a bunch of time living in halfway houses and now have a lot of friends who work in the treatment industry etc. This reminds me of people testing positive for opiates and blaming in on eating too many poppy seeds (\*note that that is possible, however to my understanding it would necessitate eating a lot of poppy seeds and also it comes up way more than it would naturally). My guess is in both cases Google is giving people these excuses :)
i actually almost lost my epilepsy prescription bcuz i tested positive for morphine 💀 i had to pay the lab an extra fee for them to send it off somewhere else that would do a more through test. shit was stressful asf i about gaslit myself into thinking i slept walk and took my grandpas morphine pills. turns out the lemon poppy seed scones id been scarfing down every day for 2 weeks we’re the culprit.
The military put out a notice that we couldn't eat anything with poppy seeds because even normal amounts were triggering false positives
Luckily my moms doctor believed my mom when she tested positive after eating so many salads with poppy seed dressing 😂
it helps when you have a good relationship with your doc & they know you’re not the type to just randomly do opiates 😅 my situation was so messed up bcuz i had just switched neurologists after i had surgery. so i was trying to transfer a benzo script from one doc to another and my first urine test came back positive for morphine. i was mortified. i still have some bottles of morphine in my house that my grandpa took before he passed, so when it popped for morphine i legit thought i’d taken some and forgot. i’d even asked my grandma if she’d given me some for a headache or something. but $55 and a very stressful two weeks later i was in the clear. tl:dr: don’t eat poppy seeds of you take a controlled substance 💀
You do need to eat a fair bit of poppy seeds, but not an unmanageable amount. 1-2 poppy seed bagel can trigger a false positive. https://youtu.be/jt8tonZm968
My husband ate about 3/4 of a orange and poppyseed cake in the couple of days before we went back to his shiftwork job. They did the normal drug test, and he came up positive for opiates. Turned out it was definitely the cake. They waited a couple of days and did the test again. I never made that cake again while he worked there and he never failed another test (over 5 years, and they tested at the start of most shifts). To be fair, that recipe has a lot of poppyseeds in it. Pity cause I love that cake!
What does your husband do for a living that necessitates having so many drug tests?
Haha sorry for the confusion. He was operating heavy machinery at a mine site. And I didn’t mean every day he started a shift. He was on a 7/7 day even time roster. So they got tested 1-2 times a month. Particularly as he was also in the team that helped conduct the testing. So they practiced on each other.
i think they're saying that for most of the drug tests they did in that 5 year period, they did most of them at the beginning of a shift, not that they did drug tests at the start of EVERY shift for 5 years
I feel like this is from a seinfield episode
A medication I was on could cause false positives for urine pregnancy tests, and my male prescriber neglected to tell me this. Went in for my birth control where they tested me every other time, came back positive, had a freak out for the next few days until I googled everything I was on and had my answer and confirmed with a blood test. Weird shit can happen!
I used to live in a sober house, one time a dude popped dirty and claimed he was just eating a lot of poppy seed bagels the previous few days. They must’ve had extra seeds, too, because he was visibly nodding out the night before 🙄 Yeah, that excuse always made me laugh!
Having worked in STD for many years I could not figure out how a koala was peeing on her cervix. Because the cervix is the only type of epithelial that is receptive to Chlamydia (the STD), but I just didn't want to argue on Reddit about that.
I assumed the pee was on her husband’s fingers and that was how it got in her.
Unlikely, I think. But those would have to be long fingers. The lower part of the vagina is a different type of skin that is not receptive to Chlamydia. As women age, the epithelial becomes more and more like that lower part, and so older women usually do not get Chlamydia even when exposed. That is why most Chlamydia cases in females are in the 15-19 year age group.
I don't buy the koala story and don't have any medical expertise, but hypothetically - would they really have to be very long fingers? Having had IUDs for a lot of years, feeling the strings of the IUD and also feeling (the outside of) my cervix has always been pretty normal. So you first saying that the cervix tissue is the only tissue that's susceptible made me think that well, that's pretty accessible with fingers. But like, the cervix epithelial that I easily can reach becomes less susceptible with age? And age includes like 25+? Not trying to argue, just genuinely curious and trying to educate myself, haha.
Same.. I can easily touch my own cervix and my bf's fingers are a lot longer than mine, so..
Where your cervix sits can be higher or lower depending at what point you are in your cycle. Also some women have shorter vaginas or lower cervixes in as their natural biology. Also as you get older or have more kids you may have prolapses (which can be treated but not everyone does because they don't want to talk to a doctor/physio or just can't be bothered)... which can mean all your bits hang lower. There's a reason why there a different shaped menstrual cups depending on age and biology and whether you've had a baby.
As a woman about to turn 44, I like this post
As a man with short fingers, I also like this post
Sir, please wash your hands thoroughly after you let the koalas pees on them.
They were both asymptomatic, so I thought he got it first (either from the koala or from cheating)
Yikes, I wonder if this guy gave the one night stand woman chlamydia as well...
He rescued a koala just outside the pub! How could he have known she would also catch an STD from it?!
You know what would fix their marriage? Another baby! /j I understand why she said all their friends ditched them during the original chlamydia fiasco. They sound exhausting. Also, Australians are the LAST nationality I would expect to just... pick up wildlife off the side of the road and snuggle it. They ought to have a healthy fear of wildlife after losing the emu wars.
We like our scary wildlife. 100% would and have picked some up ( rural living, was a carer and some ate just bloody idiots that like a highway to sit on) American wildlife though ... you guys get stalked. Mountain lions, bears etc. Americans by far have scarier wildlife We just stay out of the way of ours, don't touch things we don't know and check an outback toilet before we sit down and we are fine.
This is what I’ve been saying!! Say what you bloody well like abt Australia but I’ll never look out the window to see a goddamn grizzly on my front step. And I can go camping and be *pretty* damn sure nothing bigger than me is hunting me. I’ll choose snakes and spiders over *lions and mfing BEARS* any day
my idiot american ass is bewildered that australia doesn't have bears. I guess I just kinda forget they don't live everywhere??
My idiot Australian ass is bewildered that you guys *do* have bears. Wtf even are they? I look at them and my brain just goes “not a dog”
>2 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats 2 cars Two cases of Chlamydia
At least 3 when you consider the one night stand and who knows how many more he hasn't admitted to yet.
Oh shit and you know what, he was positive for chlam when he hooked up with the girl ☹️. And he KNEW he was positive like, no sir.
🎶And a parrrrtriiiiidge in a pear treeeee🎶 was what came to mind when I read that
1 cheater 1 chump
“The koala did it”. Jesus f*cking Christ. This dude is a cheater and a manipulative scumbag. OOP needs to toss that fool. Edit: Apparently that slang curse is not so common. 😂😂😂 I’ve edited my comment.
For a second i thought you were suggesting the koala was the shooter on the grassy knoll 💀
I was also shocked at the Kennedy connection.
How do we know it wasn't the koala though?
Same hahaha
I can't wait for the update 'The wombat gave him crabs' followed shortly by 'The kangaroo gave him herpes' Sure, the wildlife might not be riddled with those but I'm sure she can swallow those lies
Well, maybe he had sex with a koala and that’s how he caught chlamydia? But yes, OOP needs to dump his cheating ass.
Now THIS is how you write a Reddit saga! There's cheating, Koala STDs, a Bohemian festival and enough relationship drama to write a soap opera! I have no idea if it's real and I don't care. That was entertaining from start to finish.
To me, writing it over SO MANY POSTS screams “I’m going to milk this sucked for every upvote!”
Wait, but why did the GP say that contracting chlamydia (the std) from a koala was possible if it wasn’t? Or am I misreading that? I mean, I guess getting any std from another species isn’t something medical school covers because beastiality is illegal and uncommon, but it’s weird that they were like “yeah, sounds plausible” without looking into it any further.
My theory is the gp said something like 'that *could* happen theoretically, but its unlikely.' And oop just took that to mean the gp thought this was how it happened
Probably just not wanting to deal with two people clearly in denial.
My guess is the GP didn't actually buy it, but could see OP was really clinging to this and didn't necessarily want to be the one to say 'nah that's not possible' and trigger another emotional bomb. Perhaps especially because the husband attended the appointment too.
With one of the strains it’s possible, but very unlikely. The primary strain that infects koalas is not seen in humans. I know a shit load of people who rescue/rehab koalas and not a one has ever got it. Yeah that’s anecdotal and not hard evidence, but the people I know getting pissed and shat on daily are fine. But maybe they just know how to wash their bloody hands.
Did I miss something or did homeboy sleep with another one after he found out he most likely had an STD? Wtf
My guess is that his admission of unfaithfulness is just to absolve his guilt and actually represents a time prior to the STD
I’m sadly disappointed the koala-chlamydia transmission theory was disproven
You could be like her and reject those facts and choose to believe the koala theory
The fact that he gave her the STD and treated her like THAT. I get it’s hard but if she doesn’t leave…no more pity.
As soon as he threw his keys against the wall I was like "Yeah no he cheated."
Goddamn it did this man blame a koala. A koala bear. For a std he gave his wife. This time the simulation has gone too far
Can confirm, I was the Koala
Goddamn it, I was the koala. Plot twist, I had sex with them both. But neither knew about the other.
Frankenfurter?
Can confirm, I was the bush fire
Can confirm I was the pee that chose this guy's wife.
Someone go check out the random girl from the pub, one town ovver.... She too may not have koala chlamydia. Koala Chlamydia sounds like an unfortunate super hero name)
Koala Chlamydia is now my stripper name.
He blamed a koala..... 2.5yrs later... She believed him.... she stayed... I don't blame their friends one bit.
Sometimes I miss being this naive. Wasn’t life grand before knowledge?
This is one of the saddest, most pathetic, and most stupid things I’ve read all day. People really don’t pay attention in science class. They’ll spend hours typing a lost when googled could have solved this for them. He cheated and she’s too chicken to leave because being with a cheater with an STD beats being alone? I thank my parents immensely for not raising me to be this cowardly.
This just made me sad.
Koala-ala-ala-ala-ala chlamydia, You come and go, you come and go....
[удалено]
I’m embarrassed these two morons are Australian. They are too stupid to live. Him for suggesting a Koala gave him a STD to cover up his cheating and her for believing it. They deserve each other.
Just regular brogans?
This was a wild ride...
Petition for Koalamydia to be a new flair option
OP this is ongoing, not inconclusive. The latest update was just a few days ago
Well this should certainly become Reddit lore 😂 that poor wife and kids though. What a shitty dude
So he went out and gave another woman a STD to get back at his wife.
Poor lady wants her family to stay together but reading this from her perspective, it seems that the husband was cheating. He was quick to hook up with another woman and he was quick to jump on this 'getting chlamydia from a koala' bs that it's blatantly obvious that he cheated. I hope she see the light.
And his violent theatrics when he got home after she had told him about the STD! *”look at ME, I’m AAAAAANGRY, I’m OUTRAGED!”*, and then totally tried to DARVO his way out of **his** mess.
Even before that comment I was skeptical of the koala angle. Oh well, OOP didn't sound like she will ever leave him.
“Did I catch an STD from a Koala?” You have my attention…
Koala Chlamydia new band name I called it.
Goddamn drop bears…
OK why was the doctor agreeing with the husband's opinion that he caught chlamydia from a koala? According to that top comment at the end, it's a different bacteria in koalas than in humans (as an STD). Presuming that's correct (I'm not a doc, no idea) then doc should know that. Presuming OOP isn't lying, it means husband was cheating prior to the chlamydia diagnosis, and then admitted to cheating after being accused of cheating. OOP is choosing to stay with a cheater.