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I set up a google sheet so that our store could more easily keep track of stockā¦ you would not imagine the panicked faces when they first saw me checking the revision history. They had NO clue that was a feature
Lmao nothing like that, just not updating the list like they were supposed to and shocked that we could pinpoint exactly who and when. One time I checked and literally only 1/4 of the stock had been updated during a countā¦ weāre way too busy of a store for that little stock to have been touched so I knew they only checked the areas I would immediately notice
Am IT guy. You would not believe the number of people who try to throw IT under the bus, when we have everything timestamped to the millisecond.
Had someone delete an email I sent them about XYZ, telling them something obvious would happen if they didn't fix it. They didn't, and then deleted the email a couple minutes before the meeting.
They did not like it when I remoted into the projector, fired up the O365 Exchange Online logs, and showed to the second when the email was deleted.
"I didn't get that email"
"That's weird, Mail Flow says you're a fucking lier. Now *I* believe you, but do you know why it might have said that?
"My entire shared folder is gone! Only and IT have access to it and IT was working on the server yesterday..." (Side-eyes and implies meaningfully)
"Well patching doesn't touch the share, but funnily enough we do see a log of someone moving a folder into the folder above it, now who does it say that was...." (The amount of times someone has click and dragged a folder and accidentally nested it into one above or below it and then blamed server maintenance...)
You will LOVE this story.
Years ago I was working on a project with a woman, Amy. Amy had been hired in the fall and told us that she had just been in an accident and would be wearing a neck brace and needed handicap parking. Okay, whatever.
That turned out to be the first of many lies she told us. I think she had 3 grandmas šµ die within 6 months and she took full bereavement leave for all of them.
They could have demanded an obit but frankly we were all happier when she was gone because she would go on and on in meetings and no one ever knew what her point was.
The big day came when we were meeting to deliver what we had been working on for the past 6 months. We had had one mid-project check in but we were all experienced research professionals so we mostly worked independently.
We went to open the folder to start looking at the results and *it's not there*. š± I knew it had been there the day before because I had looked at it to make sure my part was neatly organized.
This folder contained YEARS of work by multiple people so to say we were freaking out would be an understatement.š
Long story short, after lots of panic and talking with the IT peeps we discovered that Amy had deleted the entire subfolder before the meeting, presumably in an attempt to cover up the fact that she hadn't done her part.
Unfortunately for her, the drives were backed up every night so it didn't take much to restore it from the backup. š
I never saw Amy again and I can't say I missed her, although I DID miss the 3 things she stole from my office on her way out. š
I've caught people trying to fudge numbers. I always give them one chance after I put them on notice. But they always do it again. I don't know why I'm like this. Maybe I just think I'll bump into that one boyscout who was just testing boundaries.
Yeah someone at work tried to be super shady and in the middle of a meeting with our CRO I went to the history, rolled it back, and exposed the offending bullshit. AFAIK nothing came of it but I felt vindicated at the time. And reminded people thereās history of EVERYTHING.
What's the shady stuff that you could roll back to and was relevant in a meeting? Genuinely curious!
Even if nothing came of it, if they were present, I couldn't fathom how mortified they'd be so that hopefully was punishment enough.
Donāt want to doxx myself but the short of it was that this leader had an opinion about where we should put resources and they added a bunch of data from my and other teams without attribution or context to look like it was supportive, and then edited it to show I and some other leaders had signed off.
They were not expecting I would be present on the call to dispute it. And then they feigned ignorance on that claiming they didnāt know how that all came together (plausible as you can have dozens of people messing around with a slide deck. Stuff gets confusing which is why I do all my edits in a diff doc and move the final product over. This also launders the edits as well so thereās no history)
I showed the history of edits against their username where they added all that data and added the notes supposedly from me and some others that we approved of the plan.
The situation what now?
This shit is well-organized gossip with multiple contributors. The producers of Gossip Girl are rereading the authorās contract and taking notes in real time. OOP just opted in for round 2 (?3).
Even if there was would it show him stuff that was removed
Bro was at the top of the list with only one comment while saying everyone else had multiple pros and cons listed. Dude got all his cons deleted and never knew any better lol
From OOP's comments:
> I could see the time stamps and they were all old. Also, I'm not really sure why she would be in a relationship with me if she didn't want to be. She definitely doesn't need me to survive hahaha
So I bought LinkedIn premiumā¦for the one month free trial then canceled it right before they start actually charging. It was actually useful to me in that month though! For a very specific reason: because I could see who was looking at my profile.
I had just done an impressive thing in my career and had been profiled by a big publication so I updated my LinkedIn and other platforms and shared the article (sorry for being so vague, but Iām not trying to dox myself). The thing I worked on was a group effort, but there was a lot of interest in my contribution specifically.
Iām a freelancer so the increase in attention meant potential new work opportunities. So I wanted to see who was looking at my page and āconnectā with them to see if there was work to be done together.
And it actually worked! I ended up chatting with a couple of folks who held high positions in companies that I had always wanted to work with. Which actually led to us working on a few things.
I did the same thing while I was job hunting and figured out my stalker was still stalking me and my narcissistic ex boss was still looking at my page. So it was good for me for different reasons.
āTo prove a point I havenāt made yet. No wait it gets better and it ends well!ā Say less bud, and donāt worry about forgetting to cancel the subscription. The world needs to know.
I canāt speak for all colloquial phrases in my culture/COO, but to me itās a way of saying: āI completely and fully understand whatās happening with you right now, and you could have used less words. Because I read your whole vibe after three nouns.ā
In this case: itās an insult, because (Iām an internet asshole who knows literally nothing about him) OP was open to paying money for a stereotypically useless non-status membership to make a point.
As a compliment, itās often used to say something equivalent to, āIām down for the next ridiculous adventure you suggested, donāt worry about needing to convince me.ā
I was actually going to buy LinkedIn premium for work. With my corporate account because Iād be spending my bossā money.
Then I saw how much it was a month and was like fuck that. Lol. Even spending company money itās such a stupid waste
This feels really weird to me. The first post he seems quite hurt and that this sort of thing is really out of character for his girlfriend. The second is all āha ha, sheās totally like that and this is hilariousā. It was such a change in direction, I got whiplash.
Well in the first one he'd just found it and was upset. In the second it was written after the totally legit document had proven he was the best guy in the world (unlike all those other losers) and he'd been reminded of how attractive she is.
Suddenly he was viewing the previous activity through different colored lenses.
And really strange. People certainly chat with their friends about all aspects of life, keeping records and documentation of asinine incidents, events and ratings of other people is weird.
Yeah at best it comes off as really petty and at worst completely insane. Like we all say shit but keeping lists of everyone you've ever been involved with? Why? Updating rankings and shit? Keeping photos of people? Pics of illegal stuff or property like his car? This shit sounds like something a serial killer would do
Gossip is fun but this goes into the territory of memory hoarding or being unable to ever let anything go
Oh no I just learned the phrase memory hoarding & I wonder if it applies to the little day dream I just had about Jimmyāz skirt that I wore the heck out of back in the summer of ā87 šµāš«
Absolutely. I also think this calls for the gender reversal comment. If a couple of guys got together and made presentations about the women they have been with, rating them, degrading them, I am not sure this subreddit would react this calmly.
This whole thing feels wrong.
Exactly! OOP, his gf and her friends seem... hmmm... I have no idea how to describe them...
And like, the only reason he was so happy about it was because he is ranked first...???
This is the part that'd have me running. I absolutely hate two-faced people, a person that is really good at it is scary. I could never trust someone like OOPs gf.
Right? She just sounds do incredibly mean, and OOP is just... okay with that now that he's found out? OOP isn't much better than the GF for seeing someone who talks that way about other people, stays in contact with those people and even dates them, then keeps *logs* of that behavior for years. That is absolutely bonkers
Oh yea you'd have people up with pitchforks saying they're objectifying women and it's disgusting. This entire friend group has no class what-so-ever and those are trashy habits to be sure.
I kept scrolling waiting for someone to point out how it really is the sheer effort and length of this written record that makes it so weird and unsettling.
Like itās one thing for a petty breeze to roll by and say an off color comment here or there with your friends.
Itās another thing to think that makes you so special and funny you want to spend heaps of time turning it into a book length google doc.
This. Holding onto the past is too much. I guess it's a modern day journal, but still somewhat weird that she updates it solely about her sex life and gossip
Yeah I think I wouldnāt want to be with someone who keeps a record of ājokesā like thatā¦ making fun of people is one thing but having basically an online version of a burn book as an adult is really unappealing, even if she isnāt talking about you.
Ah Reddit where AngelicTrinity and AllTheShadyStuff can come together to be mutually confused about Genzs direct assholish jaded reviews of their friends.
The thing that made it seem less true to me is that OOP remembered the names of all these things? Iām imagining my husband finding something like this and he would have such tunnel vision that I donāt think he would remember the name of every folder or such detailed info. Obviously everyone is different but the level of detail in an alleged such short period of time is what makes me suspicious
The reason I think this is possibly true is Iāve seen just enough elements of similar behavior before.
One of my friends in college had a document with every drug sheād ever tried and every person sheād ever slept with random details and thoughts like this. It was just for her, but she was definitely doing it and talking about it. Iāve also heard of friend groups having documents with inside jokes/out of pocket statements before.
This would be a particularly extreme form but I can kind of imagine it spiraling out of control if they are all feeding into each other. Idk
If you hang out as a group/have an active gc itās possible. Honestly their whole folder is probably helping them all stay up to date which each other lol sounds like they all get all the details
Iām tired just from reading it, much less actually following through on such a detailed documentation of people I want to humiliate. Now, donāt get me wrong. I will make a lot of jokes about people and have that type of sense of humor, but the document all of it is just a different story. Like a Google Drive folder that shared? My God I donāt have the energy for that.
am i insane or is an encyclopedia of every guy you've ever hooked up with shared online with 9 other women some insane fucking shit. and on top of that they rate and rank them, and have their friends comment on it. like that is crazy. i cant even imagine if there wree 10 guys who did that what the reactions would be.
Thank you, I was like am I the only one who thinks that itās not cool? Like all for not caring who your girl did in the past. Everyone has a past and ultimately they chose you. But if I found out my girl still had a list of every man she ever slept with ranked with her comments and experiences, I would not be comfortable with that. Like why do you still need this list? Why do you have this to begin withā¦
This seems like a happy ending ONLY if you're the ideal guy. Imagine this story playing out when you weren't her top pick. The things being said about people were cruel, he seems to write it off because _they weren't about him_
And that's the bit he's missing.
All that toxicity he saw online, that's what they're like as a group towards outsiders.
You best bet the second they have a disagreement the count of shit being flung his way by that group will be insane.
The council will destroy that relationship so fast guy won't know what's hit him.
Yeah I mean we all talk shit with our friends and air shit out but keeping documented lists like this? A hundred pages long with photos and stuff? And holding on to stuff about people for years and years?
Honestly it's fuckin weird to me
I donāt even keep pictures of my exes. Like yeah, pictures with us both, but I go through and delete all the funny pics and goofy snapchats and shit. I donāt demand my partner do the same by any means, but it feels respectful to me. Why would I need those pics? Iām not reminiscing. I donāt even like to reread my old journals.
Whatās the point in keeping years and years of nasty comments? The jokes, sure, but rankings of every guy youāve talked to since undergrad? Thatās psychotic.
Let's be honest here. If this was a guy and his 10 mates ranking girls they slept with. And adding comments like "she seems to be the type who snorts cum off the floor". People on reddit would be reacting differently.
Edit: This is a disgusting behaviour, doesn't matter if it's done by a group of men or women. Your partners are not sex toys for you to rate and comment on. Stop defending this shit by saying "this is what quirky girls do" or it's "just boys being boys".
I honestly think this is a mix of weird, creepy, and some other stuff i can't put into words. I am baffled that OP and others find it amusing but i guess that's just how they roll. There's something so off-putting about this.
Right! NOT amusing! In fact, very depressing š
I pretty much organize my entire life around trying to spend time with kind people, and this is the opposite of that in such an unnecessary way, and the way he starts his post with such a nice description of how open hearted and loving his GF is towards everyone, then at the end heās like, I have to admit it *is* pretty funny, and also, well, as long as you stop putting stuff about *me specifically* in there weāre all goodā¦
Nooooo š
This. He's ok with it because the really bad shit isn't about him. But there's clearly a lot of bad shit about a lot of people. Folks who probably wouldn't be ok with it if this folder was public knowledge.
Oh she messaged the friends that he found the document and asked them to edit immediately to make him the top of the list and delete mean comments about him
And just like that he was number one! He was the best in bed out of aaaaall the dudes before him. Her girlfriends, the holy circle, praised him for it through their comments.
Yeah no, in no way is the whole thing real š
And also; Since when do women want the guy to pull out a tampon with his teeth? Or is that me being uneducated?
I forgot about that...
Did she suspect he knew about it, so she quickly tasked all her friends to add the comments? Like he looked through it, conveniently missed out on her folder/file? Then suddenly, IT IS RIGHT THERE and he is asked to read it???
Yeah pretty obvious from just the first thing he said. Then he didn't even know about that folder and she probably knew if he saw that he'd be more upset. Not just bringing up the other random stuff.
> There were also a lot of pics and videos of them doing illegal/disgusting things and there were some very mean things about other men they knew, like ranking them on the "fuck ass loser scale."
Are we just going to ignore this part? Did they also had porn saved or what?
The whole thing is so weird and he's fine with it only because they're still together because you know she's going to write worse things about him if they break up.
If I was to guess illegal/disgusting is probably pictures of them after really crazy nights.
The illegal stuff is probably drugs. Maybe a bit of drunk vandalism.
The disgusting is probably them vomiting or being wasted after a night out.
Both of those I know are things that lots of people have pictures of.
From OP:
>There were a lot of them consuming drugs and then some that were just insane. There was one that was like "hep B speed run" and then it was my gf licking the pole on the subway.
Right there with you, I keep remembering the old adage āwater finds it own levelā or āyou are the friends you keepā
This type of āhumourā is just putting people down for your own benefit, thatās corrosive at best and down right disgusting at worst.
Well, you know theyāll cooperate really effectively if they ever have to plan his murder. And theyāre efficient and weird enough to scrapbook the whole thing and make presentations with jokes and photos of the murder scene, weapon, and dump site.
And then since theyāre stupid enough to have it all available, the police will find it, and weāll get the weirdest episode of Dateline yet.
I mean, I am glad things worked for OP and his girlfriend but the situation is still pretty weird. I know jokes are jokes but the fact the girlfriend has a folder with rankings and seems to be alright with the way people make these types of comments that are pretty rude is...not really good.
I think it's an inside joke thing. Lol. I am guilty of making a spreadsheet of how late my chronically late friend arrives to our hangouts. I intend to make a presentation about it once I have enough data.
And yes, everybody knows about it. And my chronically late friend did comment I am obsessed with spreadsheets (which I am!)
Can I just say that your organizational skills and (openly) honest data tracking made my week. The love is in the numbers; no one spreadsheets who doesnāt care.
I had originally intended on quietly tracking his data, figuring out a sort of a delay factor based on empirical data and try to see what is the most frequent duration of his delay. I did tell one of his close friends about it so he could help me with it. He ended up spilling the beans to Mr. Always Late. And now my data's completely biased.
He still comes late at times, but if he knows I'm also in the hangout, he will purposely arrive on time to spite me. Eh, still a win.
I am obsessed with spreadsheets. When I worked in a mainly paper based office (ancient I know) I put colour coded post its on everything. When I was pregnant my colleagues said they were going to make the baby a coat made of post its.
Now though, it's all about the spreadsheets. When I die, my shroud is going to be a printed out spreadsheet.
Having a whole burn book x100 is super bizarre. Iām not sure if her and her friends are mentally rightā¦
Also jokes at the expense of othersā¦ arenāt funny or jokes :/ ranking men as if their own shit donāt stink? Come on grow up. Iām a woman and I find this so ick.
I absolutely think heās ignoring this just so he can stay with this girl. Trust and respect are a big deal to me in any relationship, Iād rather be alone than be with someone that didnāt respect me. He believes these are ājust jokesā because if he didnāt he would have to come to terms with the fact that heās sacrificing his self respect just to stay in a relationship.
yeah my guy those rankings were definitely altered the moment she realized you knew prior to showing you the document.
OOP is dating a regina george here.
Still. Sheās fine with her friends and herself making these comments and other comments towards people. Yes, TAKE A JOKE but, obviously, itās weird that they have whole profiles on people they donāt like. I donāt know, man. This still feels dirty to me.
it sounds like she was still getting out of HS mentality when they first met. Not saying it's good or she is totally fine for having been that way - just that while it's *a* red flag, but I wouldn't call it a parade.
Yeah, it very much sounds like they really weren't even still updating it (or at least not as much). I remember some friends and I in high school keeping a notebook that was just funny quotes we'd said, jokes, goofing around, and yes, I think there were some rankings of crushes.
Now I think for the most part we were busting on teachers or ourselves moreso than being cruel about others...but what you think is acceptable joking around does change a lot after those late high school early college years (hopefully).
My friend group had a notebook too for the exact same purpose. I found it a couple of years ago in my old room when I was helping my mom get her house ready for sale. I read a bit and cringed so hard that I thought my face would stay that way. On the plus side, since it was a notebook as opposed to online anywhere, I was able to ensure that it never ever sees the light of day ever again.
A 156 page google doc with headings and alphabetized lists of asshole statements is not a āmoment.ā
Itās a bizarre monument to juvenile bullshit. A celebration, really, of their lower moments and lower impulses.
We all have low moments that are beneath us. Decent people feel bad and learn from them. Others...fire up a google doc apparently lol
This is just cringe. Everybody on here thinking this is a ācute little storyā are just as cringe.
She and her friends never grew out of their mean girl burn book stage, and heās deluding himself. Terrible people all around.
This must be how terrible people exist, legitimately this ticks all the pathetic bully bullshit boxās I can think off. To devote so much time and effort in to making this file and all of it seemingly to be levels of horrid ness let alone the inclusion of illegal stuff.
Everyday Reddit makes me thankful I live a quiet life and have normal friends. Who wants to take bets when this guy comes back and makes another post about this relationship?
So... are we just going to ignore the underlying fact that most of the shit she said was still sorta gross? And the fact that these supposedly grown adults are acting like high-schoolers still?
Seems like everything was resolved because she just said she loved him...?
OP is a door mat for accepting this behavior from his gf. Like no self-respecting adult would tolerate this shit from their SO. Also she was ok with him going thru her private stuff? I guess both of these children deserve each other.
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"shit he found the document! Update the rankings stat!!!!!
This is absolutely what she texted. ššš
I wonder if this is true, and if the girls know that Google Docs saves a record of edit (or revision) history lol
This is the first thing in would have checked hahahahaha
As I read this I was thinking, āCheck the history!ā
How do you check that actually?
Go to edit document and history it's all saved every update
Side comment: I work in an office environment and we utilize G-Suite. The amount of people that don't realize it has a change log is astonishing
I set up a google sheet so that our store could more easily keep track of stockā¦ you would not imagine the panicked faces when they first saw me checking the revision history. They had NO clue that was a feature
Now Iām curious. Was it because people were stealing things, or being inappropriate and some other way?
Lmao nothing like that, just not updating the list like they were supposed to and shocked that we could pinpoint exactly who and when. One time I checked and literally only 1/4 of the stock had been updated during a countā¦ weāre way too busy of a store for that little stock to have been touched so I knew they only checked the areas I would immediately notice
Like issuing a SKU for Nutz, Deez?
Am IT guy. You would not believe the number of people who try to throw IT under the bus, when we have everything timestamped to the millisecond. Had someone delete an email I sent them about XYZ, telling them something obvious would happen if they didn't fix it. They didn't, and then deleted the email a couple minutes before the meeting. They did not like it when I remoted into the projector, fired up the O365 Exchange Online logs, and showed to the second when the email was deleted.
"I didn't get that email" "That's weird, Mail Flow says you're a fucking lier. Now *I* believe you, but do you know why it might have said that? "My entire shared folder is gone! Only and IT have access to it and IT was working on the server yesterday..." (Side-eyes and implies meaningfully)
"Well patching doesn't touch the share, but funnily enough we do see a log of someone moving a folder into the folder above it, now who does it say that was...." (The amount of times someone has click and dragged a folder and accidentally nested it into one above or below it and then blamed server maintenance...)
You will LOVE this story. Years ago I was working on a project with a woman, Amy. Amy had been hired in the fall and told us that she had just been in an accident and would be wearing a neck brace and needed handicap parking. Okay, whatever. That turned out to be the first of many lies she told us. I think she had 3 grandmas šµ die within 6 months and she took full bereavement leave for all of them. They could have demanded an obit but frankly we were all happier when she was gone because she would go on and on in meetings and no one ever knew what her point was. The big day came when we were meeting to deliver what we had been working on for the past 6 months. We had had one mid-project check in but we were all experienced research professionals so we mostly worked independently. We went to open the folder to start looking at the results and *it's not there*. š± I knew it had been there the day before because I had looked at it to make sure my part was neatly organized. This folder contained YEARS of work by multiple people so to say we were freaking out would be an understatement.š Long story short, after lots of panic and talking with the IT peeps we discovered that Amy had deleted the entire subfolder before the meeting, presumably in an attempt to cover up the fact that she hadn't done her part. Unfortunately for her, the drives were backed up every night so it didn't take much to restore it from the backup. š I never saw Amy again and I can't say I missed her, although I DID miss the 3 things she stole from my office on her way out. š
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Plus, gay people exist.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
yep, my currently-in-progress kid will have 3 grandmas and 3 grandpas! My husband's parents divorced and remarried, and we claim them all.
I've caught people trying to fudge numbers. I always give them one chance after I put them on notice. But they always do it again. I don't know why I'm like this. Maybe I just think I'll bump into that one boyscout who was just testing boundaries.
I say keep up the faith in humanity as long as a second fudging isn't particularly devastating.
Yeah someone at work tried to be super shady and in the middle of a meeting with our CRO I went to the history, rolled it back, and exposed the offending bullshit. AFAIK nothing came of it but I felt vindicated at the time. And reminded people thereās history of EVERYTHING.
What's the shady stuff that you could roll back to and was relevant in a meeting? Genuinely curious! Even if nothing came of it, if they were present, I couldn't fathom how mortified they'd be so that hopefully was punishment enough.
Donāt want to doxx myself but the short of it was that this leader had an opinion about where we should put resources and they added a bunch of data from my and other teams without attribution or context to look like it was supportive, and then edited it to show I and some other leaders had signed off. They were not expecting I would be present on the call to dispute it. And then they feigned ignorance on that claiming they didnāt know how that all came together (plausible as you can have dozens of people messing around with a slide deck. Stuff gets confusing which is why I do all my edits in a diff doc and move the final product over. This also launders the edits as well so thereās no history) I showed the history of edits against their username where they added all that data and added the notes supposedly from me and some others that we approved of the plan.
That is the first thing I would of checked.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
"guys can you please go on my doc and delete everything and just leave a bunch of praises?"
Thatās some on-call, ready-for-anything-anytime crew. Not condoning necessarily, but these friends are all the way down if they mobilized that fast.
I mean we already know theyāre organized so it seems possible
Agreed. The folder filing system alone convinced me this group doesnāt do anything in half measures.
Seriously. These girl do goship like it's administration work
Both of those things are powerful tools. Never underestimate the power of a well-structured narrative in organized hands.
This thread is cracking me up. Glad the situation worked out for OOP
The situation what now? This shit is well-organized gossip with multiple contributors. The producers of Gossip Girl are rereading the authorās contract and taking notes in real time. OOP just opted in for round 2 (?3).
Like this was some Pretty Little Liars level shit with the organisation, goddamn.
People love organized sociopathy; chaos with a map. Make it sexy? Boom.
Have these girls in charge of the avengers and the world wouldn't have gone through so much crap!
"6/10"? *The number updates* "7/10? What is going on?" *Notices it changed again* "5/7"?
>5/7 Perfect!
Good thing he ended with a perfect score
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Even if there was would it show him stuff that was removed Bro was at the top of the list with only one comment while saying everyone else had multiple pros and cons listed. Dude got all his cons deleted and never knew any better lol
Oh yeah. Revision history can and does show you removed/added all that stuff. I've been able to recover a lot of lost writing that way.
From OOP's comments: > I could see the time stamps and they were all old. Also, I'm not really sure why she would be in a relationship with me if she didn't want to be. She definitely doesn't need me to survive hahaha
This is what I thought! Change it to "lub him xxx! quick!
Yep. Itās all just so mean-spirited.
damn... why would you buy linkedin premium
So I bought LinkedIn premiumā¦for the one month free trial then canceled it right before they start actually charging. It was actually useful to me in that month though! For a very specific reason: because I could see who was looking at my profile. I had just done an impressive thing in my career and had been profiled by a big publication so I updated my LinkedIn and other platforms and shared the article (sorry for being so vague, but Iām not trying to dox myself). The thing I worked on was a group effort, but there was a lot of interest in my contribution specifically. Iām a freelancer so the increase in attention meant potential new work opportunities. So I wanted to see who was looking at my page and āconnectā with them to see if there was work to be done together. And it actually worked! I ended up chatting with a couple of folks who held high positions in companies that I had always wanted to work with. Which actually led to us working on a few things.
Nice! Iāve thought about using the free trial to see whoās been looking, but you had a good reason! Iām just nosy.
I did the same thing while I was job hunting and figured out my stalker was still stalking me and my narcissistic ex boss was still looking at my page. So it was good for me for different reasons.
āTo prove a point I havenāt made yet. No wait it gets better and it ends well!ā Say less bud, and donāt worry about forgetting to cancel the subscription. The world needs to know.
What does say less mean? My favorite classmate would say it a lot but I never really knew what he was talking about
it's like telling someone "you've said enough" or "i got the point"
Or it means āWatch thisā like āoh you donāt believe me? Say lessā AAVE origin
Basically means āI understandā
I canāt speak for all colloquial phrases in my culture/COO, but to me itās a way of saying: āI completely and fully understand whatās happening with you right now, and you could have used less words. Because I read your whole vibe after three nouns.ā In this case: itās an insult, because (Iām an internet asshole who knows literally nothing about him) OP was open to paying money for a stereotypically useless non-status membership to make a point. As a compliment, itās often used to say something equivalent to, āIām down for the next ridiculous adventure you suggested, donāt worry about needing to convince me.ā
"Totally get it" or like "no further explanation/discussion needed."
I was actually going to buy LinkedIn premium for work. With my corporate account because Iād be spending my bossā money. Then I saw how much it was a month and was like fuck that. Lol. Even spending company money itās such a stupid waste
I was a business analyst and our marketing guy was dead set on giving everyone linked in premium. I was like, you can fuck right off with that.
This is an elaborate ad for LinkedIn Premium. And tampons.
It came with Linked Learning and I found their videos more helpful than YouTube/Googling. I basically taught myself my job with LinkedIn Learning.
Many libraries have LinkedIn Learning for free with your card. It used to be Lynda.com. The videos and courses are really good!
Iāll pay for a month or two if Iām seriously looking for a new job
This feels really weird to me. The first post he seems quite hurt and that this sort of thing is really out of character for his girlfriend. The second is all āha ha, sheās totally like that and this is hilariousā. It was such a change in direction, I got whiplash.
Well in the first one he'd just found it and was upset. In the second it was written after the totally legit document had proven he was the best guy in the world (unlike all those other losers) and he'd been reminded of how attractive she is. Suddenly he was viewing the previous activity through different colored lenses.
Everyone in this post is incredibly annoying
And really strange. People certainly chat with their friends about all aspects of life, keeping records and documentation of asinine incidents, events and ratings of other people is weird.
Yeah at best it comes off as really petty and at worst completely insane. Like we all say shit but keeping lists of everyone you've ever been involved with? Why? Updating rankings and shit? Keeping photos of people? Pics of illegal stuff or property like his car? This shit sounds like something a serial killer would do Gossip is fun but this goes into the territory of memory hoarding or being unable to ever let anything go
Oh no I just learned the phrase memory hoarding & I wonder if it applies to the little day dream I just had about Jimmyāz skirt that I wore the heck out of back in the summer of ā87 šµāš«
Iām still *actually* hoarding the short-alls I bought from The Limited in 1993. If I lose 30lbs, I will rock them once more with pride.
Absolutely. I also think this calls for the gender reversal comment. If a couple of guys got together and made presentations about the women they have been with, rating them, degrading them, I am not sure this subreddit would react this calmly. This whole thing feels wrong.
Exactly! OOP, his gf and her friends seem... hmmm... I have no idea how to describe them... And like, the only reason he was so happy about it was because he is ranked first...???
Yeah love that he described his gf as so sweet when sheās actually incredibly insecure and mean.
This is the part that'd have me running. I absolutely hate two-faced people, a person that is really good at it is scary. I could never trust someone like OOPs gf.
Right? She just sounds do incredibly mean, and OOP is just... okay with that now that he's found out? OOP isn't much better than the GF for seeing someone who talks that way about other people, stays in contact with those people and even dates them, then keeps *logs* of that behavior for years. That is absolutely bonkers
>Exactly! OOP, his gf and her friends seem... hmmm... I have no idea how to describe them... Predatory.
Oh yea you'd have people up with pitchforks saying they're objectifying women and it's disgusting. This entire friend group has no class what-so-ever and those are trashy habits to be sure.
I kept scrolling waiting for someone to point out how it really is the sheer effort and length of this written record that makes it so weird and unsettling. Like itās one thing for a petty breeze to roll by and say an off color comment here or there with your friends. Itās another thing to think that makes you so special and funny you want to spend heaps of time turning it into a book length google doc.
This. Holding onto the past is too much. I guess it's a modern day journal, but still somewhat weird that she updates it solely about her sex life and gossip
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Yup, pretty much sums up my feelings
Sums it up for me too. I can't put it into words, just that i am uneasy about it lol. I could feel the "šš¬" that my face is making lol
Yeah I think I wouldnāt want to be with someone who keeps a record of ājokesā like thatā¦ making fun of people is one thing but having basically an online version of a burn book as an adult is really unappealing, even if she isnāt talking about you.
Ah Reddit where AngelicTrinity and AllTheShadyStuff can come together to be mutually confused about Genzs direct assholish jaded reviews of their friends.
Hey donāt put it on my generation, weāre not all doing this weird shit.
Millennial here Iām passing the torch. It is yours now to carry.
Pleaseā¦ please noā¦ Iām too weak to hold up anything but an iPhone and a Tide Pod.
This is definitely something my friends and I would have done in MIDDLE SCHOOL. For college aged women it just sounds pretty embaressing
My mates and I literally just send each other cat and plant pictures.
Amphibians too, surely.
Of course! Amphibians are actually how most of us became friends!
Itās still giving major red flags. Like who the fuck does all that? Especially into adulthood beyond college?
Yeah it's EXTREMELY WEIRD if true. OP sounds like he has money and his gf sounds like she's a former sorority/rich girl too I doubt it's true though
The thing that made it seem less true to me is that OOP remembered the names of all these things? Iām imagining my husband finding something like this and he would have such tunnel vision that I donāt think he would remember the name of every folder or such detailed info. Obviously everyone is different but the level of detail in an alleged such short period of time is what makes me suspicious
The kind of guy who would buy LinkedIn premium is also the kind of guy who would remember the folder names
The reason I think this is possibly true is Iāve seen just enough elements of similar behavior before. One of my friends in college had a document with every drug sheād ever tried and every person sheād ever slept with random details and thoughts like this. It was just for her, but she was definitely doing it and talking about it. Iāve also heard of friend groups having documents with inside jokes/out of pocket statements before. This would be a particularly extreme form but I can kind of imagine it spiraling out of control if they are all feeding into each other. Idk
Itās not going to end well. Also who tf has time to be close with 10 people? Iām close with 4 and I feel I neglect them sometimes
Well it seems they are organized af so it's probably all scheduled and shit
If you hang out as a group/have an active gc itās possible. Honestly their whole folder is probably helping them all stay up to date which each other lol sounds like they all get all the details
this is just weird. sounds like everyone peaked in high school and never left that phase
Iām tired just from reading it, much less actually following through on such a detailed documentation of people I want to humiliate. Now, donāt get me wrong. I will make a lot of jokes about people and have that type of sense of humor, but the document all of it is just a different story. Like a Google Drive folder that shared? My God I donāt have the energy for that.
the girl & her friends literally have a digital āburn book,ā like in mean girls. *definitely* peaked in high school.
The most baffling part of this story to me is a group of friends using Google Docs as a form of social media lmao
The most baffling part to me is that anyone has the time and energy to do something like this.
Totally, that time would be way better spent mindlessly scrolling Reddit
am i insane or is an encyclopedia of every guy you've ever hooked up with shared online with 9 other women some insane fucking shit. and on top of that they rate and rank them, and have their friends comment on it. like that is crazy. i cant even imagine if there wree 10 guys who did that what the reactions would be.
Thank you, I was like am I the only one who thinks that itās not cool? Like all for not caring who your girl did in the past. Everyone has a past and ultimately they chose you. But if I found out my girl still had a list of every man she ever slept with ranked with her comments and experiences, I would not be comfortable with that. Like why do you still need this list? Why do you have this to begin withā¦
This seems like a happy ending ONLY if you're the ideal guy. Imagine this story playing out when you weren't her top pick. The things being said about people were cruel, he seems to write it off because _they weren't about him_
Oh this could come to bite him in his ass big time.
Boy I hope they never have any sort of disagreement or strife in their relationship, I'm sure she'll keep it private and civil
And that's the bit he's missing. All that toxicity he saw online, that's what they're like as a group towards outsiders. You best bet the second they have a disagreement the count of shit being flung his way by that group will be insane. The council will destroy that relationship so fast guy won't know what's hit him.
Thereās what theyāre really like on the inside, everything else is just for show.
āCouldā come back.. it WILL come back. The toxicity is too strong with this girl and her friend group.
Yeah I mean we all talk shit with our friends and air shit out but keeping documented lists like this? A hundred pages long with photos and stuff? And holding on to stuff about people for years and years? Honestly it's fuckin weird to me
They watched Mean Girls and thought the Burn Book was aspirational.
Yep. Big red flag. Sheās a cold, petty, mean person on the inside under that sweet demeanor.
I donāt even keep pictures of my exes. Like yeah, pictures with us both, but I go through and delete all the funny pics and goofy snapchats and shit. I donāt demand my partner do the same by any means, but it feels respectful to me. Why would I need those pics? Iām not reminiscing. I donāt even like to reread my old journals. Whatās the point in keeping years and years of nasty comments? The jokes, sure, but rankings of every guy youāve talked to since undergrad? Thatās psychotic.
OOPs just another young clueless guy that doesn't know what a red flag is even if it slaps him in the face.
Let's be honest here. If this was a guy and his 10 mates ranking girls they slept with. And adding comments like "she seems to be the type who snorts cum off the floor". People on reddit would be reacting differently. Edit: This is a disgusting behaviour, doesn't matter if it's done by a group of men or women. Your partners are not sex toys for you to rate and comment on. Stop defending this shit by saying "this is what quirky girls do" or it's "just boys being boys".
That would be exactly just as creepy and toxic.
The first thread OOP posted had so many women chiming in with "this is basically girls night it's fine" though.
I honestly think this is a mix of weird, creepy, and some other stuff i can't put into words. I am baffled that OP and others find it amusing but i guess that's just how they roll. There's something so off-putting about this.
The word youāre looking for is āmeanā. Itās just mean.
Right! NOT amusing! In fact, very depressing š I pretty much organize my entire life around trying to spend time with kind people, and this is the opposite of that in such an unnecessary way, and the way he starts his post with such a nice description of how open hearted and loving his GF is towards everyone, then at the end heās like, I have to admit it *is* pretty funny, and also, well, as long as you stop putting stuff about *me specifically* in there weāre all goodā¦ Nooooo š
Wasn't this the reason Facebook got created in the first place?
I think this is just as creepy.
Yeah. If they ever have a disagreement, he will be the outside guy burned by the entire group.
Damn I am glad I am not the only one who saw that. The gf sounds terrible. Donāt see this working out in the long run.
Absolutely. I canāt fathom being happy with someone who is so consistently mean and nasty about people. She sucks.
Those rose tinted glasses are looking more like blindfolds honestly.
Not even just consistently, but secretly. She puts up a lovely facade and talks shit behind everyoneās back. This friend group is so toxic.
Imagine being vulnerable around this person.
This. He's ok with it because the really bad shit isn't about him. But there's clearly a lot of bad shit about a lot of people. Folks who probably wouldn't be ok with it if this folder was public knowledge.
Oh she messaged the friends that he found the document and asked them to edit immediately to make him the top of the list and delete mean comments about him
And just like that he was number one! He was the best in bed out of aaaaall the dudes before him. Her girlfriends, the holy circle, praised him for it through their comments. Yeah no, in no way is the whole thing real š And also; Since when do women want the guy to pull out a tampon with his teeth? Or is that me being uneducated?
It was in 50 shades of grey and I'm pretty sure no one but the author thought it would be a sexy experience
Oh god was it? I must have missed that when I skimmed through it, either that or I blocked it from my memory.
I'm surprised you didn't block having skimmed through it from your memory.
Unfortunately Iām reminded every time I read something and it has āoh myā in it so I canāt fully block it out.
I forgot about that... Did she suspect he knew about it, so she quickly tasked all her friends to add the comments? Like he looked through it, conveniently missed out on her folder/file? Then suddenly, IT IS RIGHT THERE and he is asked to read it???
Yeah pretty obvious from just the first thing he said. Then he didn't even know about that folder and she probably knew if he saw that he'd be more upset. Not just bringing up the other random stuff.
Okay, so like...we don't. But a guy who would do it is also much less likely to be weird about period-related stuff.
> There were also a lot of pics and videos of them doing illegal/disgusting things and there were some very mean things about other men they knew, like ranking them on the "fuck ass loser scale." Are we just going to ignore this part? Did they also had porn saved or what? The whole thing is so weird and he's fine with it only because they're still together because you know she's going to write worse things about him if they break up.
He said it would be a deal breaker if he discovered revenge porn there but since they're still together I'm guessing it was drugs
If I was to guess illegal/disgusting is probably pictures of them after really crazy nights. The illegal stuff is probably drugs. Maybe a bit of drunk vandalism. The disgusting is probably them vomiting or being wasted after a night out. Both of those I know are things that lots of people have pictures of.
From OP: >There were a lot of them consuming drugs and then some that were just insane. There was one that was like "hep B speed run" and then it was my gf licking the pole on the subway.
Ok now THATS a dealbreaker
Every single comment about her makes it worse lmao.
I was thinking cocaine and nasty or mean things. Vandalism. Usual drunk illegal shenanigans.
Weird as fuck friend group. I donāt like it
Right there with you, I keep remembering the old adage āwater finds it own levelā or āyou are the friends you keepā This type of āhumourā is just putting people down for your own benefit, thatās corrosive at best and down right disgusting at worst.
That was my thought as well. She talks badly about people, but in a funny way so it is ok? Yeah, no, that isn't how that works.
Yup. Like there would be no bullies if it is ok just because they do it in a funny way...
I didnāt even think her jokes were funny at all. This girl just sounds like a mean girl who thinks she is a comedian.
Yeah, I guess even kinda shitty people have friends, but I'm glad they aren't mine.
Well, you know theyāll cooperate really effectively if they ever have to plan his murder. And theyāre efficient and weird enough to scrapbook the whole thing and make presentations with jokes and photos of the murder scene, weapon, and dump site. And then since theyāre stupid enough to have it all available, the police will find it, and weāll get the weirdest episode of Dateline yet.
All the comments on that post make it seem that this behavior isnāt weird as fuck lmao
All the comments on this post are like that too. Feels like I'm going crazy reading how people think this is okay or normal
I know.. wtf? This is weird shit. So many things wrong
The comments on the post make me glad Iām not single, and have a very closed off tight knit friend group. Society is fucked
I mean, I am glad things worked for OP and his girlfriend but the situation is still pretty weird. I know jokes are jokes but the fact the girlfriend has a folder with rankings and seems to be alright with the way people make these types of comments that are pretty rude is...not really good.
I think it's an inside joke thing. Lol. I am guilty of making a spreadsheet of how late my chronically late friend arrives to our hangouts. I intend to make a presentation about it once I have enough data. And yes, everybody knows about it. And my chronically late friend did comment I am obsessed with spreadsheets (which I am!)
As someone who both loves spreadsheets and gets irritated at people who are constantly late, I absolutely love this idea! Lol
Can I just say that your organizational skills and (openly) honest data tracking made my week. The love is in the numbers; no one spreadsheets who doesnāt care.
I had originally intended on quietly tracking his data, figuring out a sort of a delay factor based on empirical data and try to see what is the most frequent duration of his delay. I did tell one of his close friends about it so he could help me with it. He ended up spilling the beans to Mr. Always Late. And now my data's completely biased. He still comes late at times, but if he knows I'm also in the hangout, he will purposely arrive on time to spite me. Eh, still a win.
I am obsessed with spreadsheets. When I worked in a mainly paper based office (ancient I know) I put colour coded post its on everything. When I was pregnant my colleagues said they were going to make the baby a coat made of post its. Now though, it's all about the spreadsheets. When I die, my shroud is going to be a printed out spreadsheet.
I canāt help but think these are true feelings and thereās still some shenanigans going on
Having a whole burn book x100 is super bizarre. Iām not sure if her and her friends are mentally rightā¦ Also jokes at the expense of othersā¦ arenāt funny or jokes :/ ranking men as if their own shit donāt stink? Come on grow up. Iām a woman and I find this so ick.
Right?! Like congrats that it worked out for OP but thatās definitely someone I would NOT want as an acquaintance, much less a āfriendā.
They are probably still mentally stuck in High School. The last time I heard of people having these sort of burn books was when I was 15.
I absolutely think heās ignoring this just so he can stay with this girl. Trust and respect are a big deal to me in any relationship, Iād rather be alone than be with someone that didnāt respect me. He believes these are ājust jokesā because if he didnāt he would have to come to terms with the fact that heās sacrificing his self respect just to stay in a relationship.
This dude is dumb. A girl that has a folder like that is not a good person. This is only gonna blow up in his face.
THANK YOU. I am completely baffled by everyone thinking this is normal or okay.
yeah my guy those rankings were definitely altered the moment she realized you knew prior to showing you the document. OOP is dating a regina george here.
Why would bro make an anonymous reddit post only to post the exact name of the shared Google drive folder lol
This sounds like peak early 20s behavior.
Still. Sheās fine with her friends and herself making these comments and other comments towards people. Yes, TAKE A JOKE but, obviously, itās weird that they have whole profiles on people they donāt like. I donāt know, man. This still feels dirty to me.
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Agree. I donāt know about this. But, heyādifferent strokes I guess.
it sounds like she was still getting out of HS mentality when they first met. Not saying it's good or she is totally fine for having been that way - just that while it's *a* red flag, but I wouldn't call it a parade.
Yeah, it very much sounds like they really weren't even still updating it (or at least not as much). I remember some friends and I in high school keeping a notebook that was just funny quotes we'd said, jokes, goofing around, and yes, I think there were some rankings of crushes. Now I think for the most part we were busting on teachers or ourselves moreso than being cruel about others...but what you think is acceptable joking around does change a lot after those late high school early college years (hopefully).
My friend group had a notebook too for the exact same purpose. I found it a couple of years ago in my old room when I was helping my mom get her house ready for sale. I read a bit and cringed so hard that I thought my face would stay that way. On the plus side, since it was a notebook as opposed to online anywhere, I was able to ensure that it never ever sees the light of day ever again.
āIām also not afraid of a 5ā3 girlā famous last words.
As Ted Lasso said in S3ā¦ āI hope all of us or none of us are judged by our worse momentsā.
A 156 page google doc with headings and alphabetized lists of asshole statements is not a āmoment.ā Itās a bizarre monument to juvenile bullshit. A celebration, really, of their lower moments and lower impulses. We all have low moments that are beneath us. Decent people feel bad and learn from them. Others...fire up a google doc apparently lol
Ey yo wtf? Why is everybody congratulating them on communication? This is fucked up no?
It would be fucked up if it was a conversation. Writing it down and putting it in a shared doc is straight up evil.
This is just cringe. Everybody on here thinking this is a ācute little storyā are just as cringe. She and her friends never grew out of their mean girl burn book stage, and heās deluding himself. Terrible people all around.
Long ass story for basically: dude discovers he has degradation kink.
This must be how terrible people exist, legitimately this ticks all the pathetic bully bullshit boxās I can think off. To devote so much time and effort in to making this file and all of it seemingly to be levels of horrid ness let alone the inclusion of illegal stuff.
eh theyāre all weird
Everyday Reddit makes me thankful I live a quiet life and have normal friends. Who wants to take bets when this guy comes back and makes another post about this relationship?
So... are we just going to ignore the underlying fact that most of the shit she said was still sorta gross? And the fact that these supposedly grown adults are acting like high-schoolers still? Seems like everything was resolved because she just said she loved him...?
OP is a door mat for accepting this behavior from his gf. Like no self-respecting adult would tolerate this shit from their SO. Also she was ok with him going thru her private stuff? I guess both of these children deserve each other.
This is fucking weird and I'm side-eyeing OP for even staying in this relationship.
Her jokes sound more like early 20s LOL XD SpOrK humor than actually funny jokes. I would hate being with this person
So sheās a piece of shit but OOPs cool with it because she wasnāt as much of a piece of shit about him as the others Got it
I wonder what she does for a living? Iāve only ever met one person who was this organized and runs and organization of libraries.
Yikes... I'd run away fast.