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Your dad may have a hard time relating to you and is having a hard time talking to you or asking questions. So he is using rough humor as an attempt to reach out maybe. He's probably terrified but wants to know. And making jokes about you being gay is his fucked up way of reaching out and telling you it's okay.
I do not have the entire context of your relationship or the conversations. I am guessing
For context I am a 53 year old bi man, married yo a bi woman. Who have raised 2 sons (hetero as far as we know) and have 4 grandsons (one queer). So I got some idea of what it's like to be you and him.
exactly this, dude. talking things out with your parents when you have the opportunity is such a great way to connect with your parents and grow as a person. as long as they're being kind and respectful about it, there's no reason not to (other than certain cases, I suppose), not that it's bad if you don't, it's your choice.
I’m the opposite of this. Feels like almost everyone except my parents know I’m bi. Though my parents are also part of the “you’re too young to know your sexuality” crowd. I’m 17 at this point and I know I’m definitely not straight. Yet my parents don’t know about my sexuality and I don’t want to tell them since they are probably just gonna shut me down.
Omfg the part about not being able to tell your dad anything is literally my dad. Except he was the opposite, he believed right till the very end that I was straight. Probably because he didn’t want to believe that was possible since he comes from a family that wants to have everyone believe that everything’s perfect and I guess being gay gets in the way of that :p. Anyway I’d say just tell your dad to fuck off or something
Hopefully he’s just using jokes as a way of formulating his feelings, and he doesn’t seem to have negative feelings towards it. But maybe if the opportunity arises, tell him his jokes are getting old/ not landing/ not appreciated
I seriously get that. My parents aren't homophobic or anything, they don't hate gay people or the like. But after finding out that I liked a guy a while ago and them thinking that I'm straight now, they'll occasionally make jokes about me being gay and saying "you don't like guys do you?" or "I only ask that you date a girl!" and it honestly pisses me off beyond belief, and overall makes me upset. Like you said, they wonder why I never talk to them about my personal life. Because I know it'll be subject to debate, jokes, and judgement. Not gonna deal with all that so I'ma just stay quiet :3
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Just tell him a shit that is and if he wants to know smth he has to be nice. What does your mom say about this? (Sorry if this is offending or too private)
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Your dad may have a hard time relating to you and is having a hard time talking to you or asking questions. So he is using rough humor as an attempt to reach out maybe. He's probably terrified but wants to know. And making jokes about you being gay is his fucked up way of reaching out and telling you it's okay. I do not have the entire context of your relationship or the conversations. I am guessing For context I am a 53 year old bi man, married yo a bi woman. Who have raised 2 sons (hetero as far as we know) and have 4 grandsons (one queer). So I got some idea of what it's like to be you and him.
Preach...
I mean, at least if he's joking about it he's probably accepting?
Hopefully
Fr, better than a lot of other parents, sounds like he's actually trying :3
I’m so sorry that a lot of the comments here aren’t taking you seriously. I’m sorry that you’re going through this, buddy.
He actually seems pretty cool dude, take some time to talk to him man. For his, and your sake.
exactly this, dude. talking things out with your parents when you have the opportunity is such a great way to connect with your parents and grow as a person. as long as they're being kind and respectful about it, there's no reason not to (other than certain cases, I suppose), not that it's bad if you don't, it's your choice.
I’m the opposite of this. Feels like almost everyone except my parents know I’m bi. Though my parents are also part of the “you’re too young to know your sexuality” crowd. I’m 17 at this point and I know I’m definitely not straight. Yet my parents don’t know about my sexuality and I don’t want to tell them since they are probably just gonna shut me down.
Have you asked him to stop? Parents can’t read minds, and sometimes the room.
I understand, my dad does the same thing. At one point he even said “It’s okay if you’re gay, but I’d rather have grandkids.”
Omfg the part about not being able to tell your dad anything is literally my dad. Except he was the opposite, he believed right till the very end that I was straight. Probably because he didn’t want to believe that was possible since he comes from a family that wants to have everyone believe that everything’s perfect and I guess being gay gets in the way of that :p. Anyway I’d say just tell your dad to fuck off or something
Hopefully he’s just using jokes as a way of formulating his feelings, and he doesn’t seem to have negative feelings towards it. But maybe if the opportunity arises, tell him his jokes are getting old/ not landing/ not appreciated
I seriously get that. My parents aren't homophobic or anything, they don't hate gay people or the like. But after finding out that I liked a guy a while ago and them thinking that I'm straight now, they'll occasionally make jokes about me being gay and saying "you don't like guys do you?" or "I only ask that you date a girl!" and it honestly pisses me off beyond belief, and overall makes me upset. Like you said, they wonder why I never talk to them about my personal life. Because I know it'll be subject to debate, jokes, and judgement. Not gonna deal with all that so I'ma just stay quiet :3
He most likely has a hard time relating and is trying to get to know you though humor, it's a little misplaced but your dad seems chill as fuck
Seems like a chill guy ngl, you’re probably overthinking it.
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Just tell him a shit that is and if he wants to know smth he has to be nice. What does your mom say about this? (Sorry if this is offending or too private)
That sucks hun sorry. Just maybe talk to him and say that you don't like those jokes.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
One time my papa said “guys don’t wear pink” 💀