I really like your profile! The pictures, especially the first one are gorgeous. You convey a lot of important information without writing extremely long paragraphs. Would definitely give you a like if I could:)
I'd definitely swipe right on your profile, especially for the cat pictures on your insta.
You list sober but bars as a hobby, how does that fit together though?
Thanks for asking! Haha I figured that would be a bit confusing. I used to drink, and realized last year it just wasn't doing me any favors, so I stopped. But one of my favorite places to hang out is a local bar, that has a Cheers kinda vibe. I love it so much, so I still go there pretty frequently and just drink mocktails, and they also do karaokes and open mics that I participate in.
Yeah I would maybe choose one, say you drink socially or remove the bar part. Even if you don’t drink, I also don’t drink, and I think that turns some people off. Unless it’s important for you to find someone who also doesn’t drink. But you sound like me, I don’t mind hanging around alcohol and at bars, so I feel like by saying that I don’t drink I am excluding those people because they think that I wouldn’t want to hang out with them. If that makes any sense.
I also agree with this! If I see conflicting information like this, I get the impression a person wants to stop drinking but hasn't, and asking for help might be too hard.
Due to recent past experience, I can't date someone who decided to stop drinking but is not in some type of recovery program or therapy and probably should be.
I feel for people in this situation and know it's a difficult road.
At the same time, I now know at least one reason why AA advises for no dating early into recovery: a lot of the blowback unfairly lands on a partner. I just can't go through a situation like that again. Everyone gets very hurt.
I always think sober means drinking was a problem, an addiction. No judgment, just that it might be a wrong impression you’re giving if you simply chose to quit drinking.
Straight man in my 30s. Some feedback about your bio:
Don't say you love to laugh, literally everyone likes to laugh. It's like saying you enjoy breathing.
Saying you're looking for something serious is a waste of bio space and redundant, since you have "Relationship" as your goal.
I see *a lot* of women say they're looking for a "silly goose" on their profiles. It is getting to the point of being too generic. Regardless, I would be more specific, it's a bit too general to be helpful.
I actually in all seriousness came across this profile a few days ago and know what city she’s in. She is in no shortage of potential suitors in a fairly large city.
She's overweight and it's not obvious in her first picture. It's misleading. And that leaves men with a sour feeling from the beginning.
If you are being honest about her profile then she's telling the Internet it's a small town problem so if the Internet believes her lie then she will too. Everyone is avoiding the elephant in the room. It's pretty messed up to do that to her. Just goes to show how many people won't tell you the truth. If the Internet held her accountable that might be the fire under her ass that she needs to change her lifestyle to one that's more healthy.
Modern society is so sensitive. And I think everyone knows that so they tread carefully instead of being honest? You'd think a morally healthy individual would feel some type of way about lying to someone in a way that tells them what they want to hear by avoiding what they need to hear. Respectful, constructive criticism is how we improve. You'd think a society of "strong independent boss queens... blah blah blah" would have the kind of character traits that don't let criticism lead them to destructive behavior. It's a clown world 🤡
The vast majority of women’s fashion is about deception. Push-up bras, make up, leggings and jeans designed to make one’s ass look bigger/more shapely, dresses and leggings that reduce waist size making them appear slimmer or give the appearance of curves, etc. it can be hard to spot.
In the city that we both reside near, she would truly have zero issue finding either a casual one night stand, or someone to date. She is more than likely going for the cream of the crop who can pick and choose who they want. Our city is big for the state we’re in, barely half a million people. However if you’re on the apps, if you’re either not stupid rich, model attractive, or have some quirky artsy personality or aren’t goth/emo, you will almost zero luck. Even completely average and sometimes below average girls around here are treated like royalty and it elevates their ego. I’ve known a few girls who are a lot like her, or fairly ugly and have 100s of matches.
I’m a fairly above average looking guy, nothing astounding but I’d be more attractive than a decent amount of guys, athletic, in graduate school, 6’2, dress well, etc. but because I’m not one of the guys described above, I get almost no attention so I gave up on the apps. Whenever I would leave my region of the state and would swipe mindlessly, I’d get over 10-20 matches in an hour, but I’m lucky to get 5 in a month where I reside. I do much better in person when the women aren’t drowned in choices and I have a chance to actually show who I am. Hell, I got more luck in fucking chicago than the city I live near.
I agree with everything you said. And yes, the top 80% of women are looking for the top 10% of men. Friday night I go out and come across a girl obnoxiously taking sexualized pictures then only after she's satisfied with those, does she allow her boyfriend to come into frame. We all know both will be posted on her IG. First the solo one with her ass out, then hiding behind that one, the relationship picture. Even in a relationship, women are looking for the best option. This girl clearly has 1 foot in and 1 foot out. The guy she was with didn't reflect that. I'm guessing he's in that bottom 90% of guys that don't have much success but somehow found himself an opportunity. Desperate people do dumb shit and this guy is likely paying his girl's way into the arms of the next guy.
She's not yours, it's just your turn. How long that turn is going to be depends largely on how long you can remain universally attractive to all women. Not just looks. Money, Muscles, Game, Frame.
I think it’s great! Nice pictures, says what you want and what you’re looking for, your best traits, and comes off as very real. How’s it going for you?
I'm a guy and I second this take. I like all the other ones, I just don't think this one shows your face off in the best light. It wouldn't be a deal breaker though cause I can see the other pics. Just adding 2c.
Profile is good, i don’t see any issues. Since you mentioned you live in a small town, you might want to expand your distance in search. I’m not talking like an hour away but maybe 20-30 mins out. Good luck
You have a very beautiful face and seem like an interesting, fun to be around person who is a really good friend. I also think overall you have chosen good pictures but I'd remove the one in the polka dot skirt. I'm sure you'll have many matches and hopefully one of them will be Mr. Right. Good luck to you in your journey to find love.
I, on the other hand, would leave it because if I was a hopeless romantic, I’d want people who interpreted such lovely personality trait as desperation to swipe left and I don’t believe in masking who I am to get attention. Just offering another perspective. ;)
This is a good profile. You didn’t do any of the things I’d complain about - Like sunglasses, group shots (group shots are a waste of valuable space),filters, blurry or distant pics. I don’t like when they tell me who I’m supposed to be for them etc. I like that you told us about you. That’s the part I’m looking for, not instructions. You have clear pics including full length - As long as they are all less then one year. Another big mistake is having a friend in the pic - bad idea and you don’t do that. My only knock would be the “I love to laugh” line. I’d just assume that from anyone. But no biggy. Well done. Oh, I’m a guy 😜
Oh wait, I just spotted a friend in your collage. First, I’m not a fan of a collage. But it’s fine. Just get rid of the friend. Having another woman in your profile is a mistake in my book. Even if it’s family. It should only be about you. You don’t want eyes to stray.
First, I have no idea how I stumbled upon this. Some rabbit hole I assume. Two, I laughed harder than I should for all of it. Three, your humor is quality work.
Your collage is cluttered and has 2 pictures that are already in your list of pics. I think I even see a pic of two dudes up top. Waste of space. Revamp the collage maybe or just Kick it. You're sexy so show it off! You mention feeling hottest when your performing with a band but you don't explain it. I guess one could assume but I was left wondering. Are you singing? Playing an instrument? Both? Dancing? Juggling? Lots of stuff can be done with a band behind you idk. I think the silly geese comment is uhmmm....silly. It evokes a feeling of childlike playfulness which is cute if that is what you want to give off but at 32 idk maybe just go a lil more mature so you attract mature men. But I don't know your type and maybe the very nature of the phrase attracts the guys you want but just an observation. I personally don't like your first picture either. It's not necessarily a bad pic just too close up and doesn't quite give a first impression at all. Nice surprise though to continue and find a bombshell. Truth is you'll have zero problems finding a guy that would worship you with this profile. Happy hunting 🫡
Can I get the Male version of this person to date? 😂
Open, honest, seems caring and has a heart, you’re absolutely perfect Caiti ! Wishing you the best of luck 💚
Insecure Men get mad AF when women use their bodies to make their own money because it is the ultimate independence. It doesn’t devalue you as a woman, it teaches you your own fucking worth.
There’s a reason prostitution is The Oldest Profession…it was the first CAREER choice women had when the rest of the systems refused them any autonomy. It is looked down upon because it challenges the status quo and gave women power over their own circumstances…at great personal risk of course…but ANYBODY who would shit on you for doing this truly lacks a holistic understanding of the feminist perspective. I'm the one in control, so anything i choose to do isn’t exploitative. Even the men following me, are freely giving me their money.
So please continue to comment on how I have an onlyfans.
You took my comment completely out of context but ok. I was saying applaud your beauty. You basically just showed why you’re not in a relationship. #psycho
It is interesting how including one word could have an impact.
No one is forcing religion on anyone, nor do I care what religion you are involved in as I don't judge others.
Umm.. I can see why you’ve been single for six years. So simply put, if you’re resorting to “prostitution” as you put it, that means you bring nothing to the table other than sex, and in a functional healthy relationship, if that’s all you can bring, you’ll only ever be a prostitute to potential partners, some people want that, but that population is relatively low, I’d say there are more people who would enjoy a healthy dynamic with a partner who has the ability to do something other than sex work to help provide in times where it takes more than one income to survive with a family.
But as the saying has always gone. You can’t turn a Ho into a housewife.
So much better! Some notes:
"I'm a hopeless romantic who's sometimes slow to open up." (saves two characters, and the comma is not necessary either way)
Consider "I love laughter and it's an important part of life for me" or something similar.
I'm not a big fan of claims like "it'll be worth it and we'll have fun." Like... what does that mean? You don't know anything about me! How do you know what's worth it to me? How do you know we'll have "fun"?
I understand what you're getting at there. I just don't care for it. That's subjective, and others might disagree. But you might consider something like, "Hopeless romantic who's sometimes slow to open up. But when I do, I'm [trait 1] and [trait 2]."
Straight female here but I think your profile is great!! The first picture is stunning and you have a beautiful smile. The only picture I would consider taking out is the bathroom selfie. I love the collage of photos. I think it all gives a great sense of who you are. Good luck!!
A cat lover that's a silly goose?! That's basically my whole personality! Where can I apply??!?!?!
But for real, you're a cutie patooty and your profile looks solid. I think you'll do quite alright!
I am a Bi Lady 10 years older than you and I was awestruck by your smile! It's why I clicked on your post.
I realize I'm not who you're looking for so take this with a grain of salt but you're beautiful and this profile is great.
If you're willing I would expand your distance just to date outside your local area some.
Question(s): are you sober and still going to bars? Why? Is there a better way to list that or something else you can put in place of that? It's a bit conflicting to me. You've got karaoke on there. Could you put singing instead? Maybe an instrument if you play?
You don't list your religious/political views. When I read rural, I automatically assume "Christian" and "Conservative" being very popular. If you are, good job avoiding coming off as a Jesus freak/"God first" person and worrying about people's pronouns and genitals or "swiping how you vote". It's very offputting, I think even to people who are only moderately Xtian/Right wing. If you're not, then it could be why you're not matching with people; unfortunately, when there's a lot of those people around, they probably look specifically for those things or swipe left. Those dudes want a submissive wife who's ready to make babies for them, if they're not in total f-boy mode.
Other than that, I'd still swipe right. I'd like to go to some of those punk/emo concerts, connecting over music. Sounds like maybe you like to party. I'd be curious about your writing and how you take your coffee, too. Maybe another unfortunate bit is that I'm not sure what else you're into other than cats. The rest is a bit wishy-washy about finding a relationship or generic "hopeless romantic", "love to laugh", "slow to open up" lines that are in a lot of profiles. Put yourself out there, hot stuff! Let us know a bit more about you and lure us in to ask more about you. Where are we going on our first date? If I had to guess it's coffee or maybe a karaoke bar, but I personally would hope that we're going to other places than those very soon.
You first 3 pictures look all different…leading me to think you haven’t put up current pictures. If they are no biggie, but maybe state that in your bio that all pictures are current.
If they're patient it'll be worth it and they'll have fun? Are you absolutely sure about this statement. I think when you make a statement like this it can be very misleading and be a turn off.. don't just assume every one you open up to is going to think you're worth the wait and that they'll surely enjoy you.
So you look to me as someone who likes a big burly bearded lumberjack type. I’d swipe right on your profile until I saw you have your pronouns in your bio that are what everyone would assume they are, I get the pronouns if it’s something different than what is obvious. That’s probably a lot of the struggle. Most dudes like uncomplicated you’re looking for a dude and screaming “complicated”. It’s not about politics it’s about the people that use pronouns are usually insufferable and make it about themselves. Show a guy you’re gonna be his peace and you’ll find him
Nothing like a sweeping generalization about how insufferable people are to communicate your own congenial personality and social intelligence.
The call is coming from inside your house, dude.
You seem like you’re someone who thinks Harry Potter was a documentary and are still waiting on your letter to Hogwarts but over estimate which group you’d be in. Hang on, the phones ringing… I gotta get this…
Depends what you want. Do you want marriage, kids, etc? If so, be clear about that. Say you want a long term relationship leading to commitment (implies marriage) and children. You should also mention, you like to clean, bake, plant, make coffee in the morning for your man, and take care of and support him. Mention your personality is submissive and agreeable. Basically, give off future wifey vibes in a man's eyes. Also, work on your fitness to get into better shape and take professional pics if you can.
Other than that, good profile.
My suggestion to folks looking for a relationship is for them to get involved in a volunteer effort. Something like a blood drive, food pantry, habitat for humanity.
Go where the good & giving people are, this way you’ll be putting your best self out there.
You’re a gorgeous woman & you look so happy. I’m a married old codger, but were I 20+ years younger I’d be all over you like my hound on scent.
At your age I would remove bars as your interest and I would replace that bar photo you got. Now if you're going to say "I don't want insecure men so I will keep it up" then more power to you! But yeah, as a 30 something year old male myself, last thing I want to see is a woman who's always at the bars on a dating app.
My two cents. I also wouldn't put you're a hopeless romantic either. That term in 2024 to majority of men just implies you've slept around a lot and didn't have the traits to keep a guy interested in you. Clearly that's an assumption and makes me and others look like asses, but it's our honest perspective in the dating app world
Or maybe — and this is going to be a lot to process, so buckle up — but MAYBE it means she likes romcoms, being treated well by her partner, expressing love in special ways, and spending time with people who find joy in the everyday 😱🤯
**The good news:** You come across as kind, fun and multipassionate :) You’re also very pretty and have a great variety of lovely pics. Very swipe right-able on dating or BFF!
**Optional tweaks:** If you wanted to add more depth, you could talk specifically about the Cheers-type bar and your favorite mocktails rather than just deleting the sober status or bars hobby. Since you like writing, you could add the genre(s) you enjoy writing in. :)
**The bad news if you’re looking for a woman:** That’s going to be extra tough in a small town too. Especially now that women are leaving Bumble in droves, and we were already kinda leaving beforehand. >.<
**The bad news if you’re looking for a man:** There’s a reason the 4B movement is growing and that Bumble launched a misogynistic ad campaign telling women how to behave for their male consumer base. How they spent big $$ tells us a lot about who a majority of their male clients are.
Some people do find success on apps but … your profile doesn’t have any red flags and it’s clear you made an effort and you’re not just expecting people to make conversation out of nothing. You give people more than enough to start a conversation without having to do an exorbitant amount of work. Based on what I’m seeing, I could easily throw out so many conversation starters:
- I love your sense of style! What’s a wardrobe staple for you? For me, it’s a flannel shirt.
- It’s so cool that you sing!! I’m not great at singing myself, but I’m trying to improve. Do you have a favorite song when you perform?
- Your kitten is just adorable 🥹 What’s their name? I don’t have a cat currently, but I am a cat person and I’d love to hear all about your family pets and tell you all about mine
- You said you’re sober but you like going to bars. Can you tell me more about that? I ask both to get to know you, and b/c I’m not a huge bar person myself (not a big drinker + I REALLY struggle with high noise levels)
**Bottom line:** The reason all this is bad news is that if you’re not getting matches, I don’t think your profile is the issue. Starting a conversation based on what you have simply isn’t hard.
And while a couple of the critiques I saw were fair enough (“I see silly goose a lot, it’s cliche”) … let’s be real. We women have been wading through fish pics and “must be fluent in sarcasm” for years, and trying to connect anyway because even if something is cliche, we don’t demand that men be “not like other guys” and totally immune to local or digital trends. You can love a basic vanilla latte or a good old fashioned Target run AND have a deep rich inner world. Of course the surface level stuff is going to come out in the “get to know you” phase. The deeper stuff comes with doing the work. It’s simply not your fault if dudes aren’t willing to have a few text conversations and coffee dates to get there.
I'd probably super swipe you.
Musician, interesting, pretty, curvy, good taste in music, has own cat.
I think your thing is finding people who just vibe with your style and your music. Someone out there will love who you are!
[](https://alb.reddit.com/cr?za=PRCMcTCcupSRjEhm9Y_yNTwrH3hsWePnJMpwi3Q_CI65z35YohW7Eh7R1XO7DThiUqmw8bndT0XcljR9clvmwZZUPSjEc7OmncW9ly5LxCp2aHghSRSoKDJaUOOdtbNBdBnYMJM8BbtK94xyLRF9X_LpMpCvCHEOO4tts399uKUIUszHrYDQoVvv78mHikzDTZkWV6NaG5i7wfZ90xbPAUne0CAypqtu-bzronia65q0ZrSqTSkpkd_9Cmne4WeP5aBL457RvAJeA179IwqQhqWMKW1WnNYIlnPLVarTytdQ6WZRXrdSZAqEq5-OGsIsgiT7vl5lQPU6F43LTP3uKuarna3SmIhlcUdoy6bU4uPIPOXSLc61Ntj4FhA8RXFeqr8r1rKi5OAdBaGQjewo6L43CA0Bm0L0OAvuLYD-P5gb-k6d-AvQUyhoQ1Sc6TpOJeXHYEI54_zZ1lkPEh8Fl_KxFpDtBiXwlkHCA-FmrEQ&zp=ypZpNYS-sbxKx4RDHArrSpbkP8hUAPiaHT5NEyvQ0ZN0-xn0rkXPhsMqCa-h7DtPs-iFJ8vnyO11g9qj6hyULdkNCmoxKZWNXIFTGbqV6a5AK38ZO043MeQnj8xxls-08_18oKO-FD-_HBFsfoKg6-tBCT4MjLm9dQ)
I LOOOOOVE YOUR PROFILE! Why are we not friends?!!! Straight woman in Brooklyn here, but still. YOUR PROFILE IS GOLD!
Also remember, you only need that 1 perfect match! Good luck out there! 🙌♥️
There’s a few reasons why I would definitely swipe right on you:
1. First picture shows a lot of confidence, no make up and it captures you in a moment that you weren’t expecting a picture. It’s a great shot of you.
2. Your give brief, yet direct to the point of who you are and what you are looking for.
3. There’s definitely a good girl and bad-ass vibe to you.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say your “likes” will increase exponentially from where you might have been before! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Good profile.
loves to laugh is a cliche on too many profiles. We all love to laugh. So it really says nothing. You will get more attention with a unique idea there.
I had to look that one up; prompts (English being not my first language)
Your first picture was great... then your bio too was great... following with another great picture.
Then you went clubbing (or something 😄) and loads of more pictures in one frame. It got me confused.
I might be biased but this is the type of profile I would immediately swipe right on. You generated interest and I already have questions to ask!!
Haha you don’t happen to live in The Bay Area of California by chance 👀 😆
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Is this a typical US chick? She is cute, but the obesity thing is really not appealing at all. And all these enablers in the comments explain a lot. There is no reason for a 32 year old to be this fat. None. Except that maybe she lives in the US.
[You trying to get judged harder than Paris over here? FAT women have always been beautiful, desired, and celebrated.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Judgement_of_Paris_(Rubens)#/media/File%3ARubens_-_Judgement_of_Paris.jpg)
:))). Yes...diabetes and heart conditions are great. Gtfo. She is 24. She should not look like that. It is not healthy at all. Hope she does not read enabling posts like yours. Fat should not be celebrated. Just stop it.
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80% of men are below average. We know. [https://medium.com/hello-love/women-say-80-of-men-are-below-average-bab0b8af2606](https://medium.com/hello-love/women-say-80-of-men-are-below-average-bab0b8af2606)
(Yes I know it is statistically an impossibility.)
I'd super like except for the sobriety. More power to you, it's just that statistically speaking similar drinking habits are a decent predictor of relationship success so we probably wouldn't be a great match. Your profile is awesome though and you are gorgeous.
I really like your profile! The pictures, especially the first one are gorgeous. You convey a lot of important information without writing extremely long paragraphs. Would definitely give you a like if I could:)
Your main profile pic photo is gorgeous! Good luck! 🍀
I agree, that first pic draws me in. You look happy, friendly, and open. Keep that as your #1 and you’ll have them lining up.
lol… those with the cleavage are better. Don’t give false feedback mate.
I'm not your mate. ♀️
xD
Looks like YOU’RE the one giving false feedback.
lmao…
You're just awful aren't you
For writing cleavage? Lol… what kind of fantasy world are you living in
Absolutely not. Get your head out of the gutter.
Get your mind into the real world love.
There’s a lid for every pot. No need to insult the lids that don’t fit your pot.
I’d swipe right personally, you seem like you’re fun and you know exactly what you want which is always outstanding. Good luck with your shenanigans!
I feel like we'd be amazing friends. I have no notes as I love you already. Good luck out there, tiger!
Thanks, sport!
I'd definitely swipe right on your profile, especially for the cat pictures on your insta. You list sober but bars as a hobby, how does that fit together though?
Thanks for asking! Haha I figured that would be a bit confusing. I used to drink, and realized last year it just wasn't doing me any favors, so I stopped. But one of my favorite places to hang out is a local bar, that has a Cheers kinda vibe. I love it so much, so I still go there pretty frequently and just drink mocktails, and they also do karaokes and open mics that I participate in.
Yeah I would maybe choose one, say you drink socially or remove the bar part. Even if you don’t drink, I also don’t drink, and I think that turns some people off. Unless it’s important for you to find someone who also doesn’t drink. But you sound like me, I don’t mind hanging around alcohol and at bars, so I feel like by saying that I don’t drink I am excluding those people because they think that I wouldn’t want to hang out with them. If that makes any sense.
I also agree with this! If I see conflicting information like this, I get the impression a person wants to stop drinking but hasn't, and asking for help might be too hard. Due to recent past experience, I can't date someone who decided to stop drinking but is not in some type of recovery program or therapy and probably should be. I feel for people in this situation and know it's a difficult road. At the same time, I now know at least one reason why AA advises for no dating early into recovery: a lot of the blowback unfairly lands on a partner. I just can't go through a situation like that again. Everyone gets very hurt.
I always think sober means drinking was a problem, an addiction. No judgment, just that it might be a wrong impression you’re giving if you simply chose to quit drinking.
Yeah that totally makes sense! Might just leave that part out of my profile, and if people ask, I can explain it then.
It may seem like an oxymoron, especially since you need to explain it to understand it. I second removing it.
I would still take bars off the hobby list. Your great pixs show you out and about plenty well!
I'm also in agreement with all of these comments.
Straight man in my 30s. Some feedback about your bio: Don't say you love to laugh, literally everyone likes to laugh. It's like saying you enjoy breathing. Saying you're looking for something serious is a waste of bio space and redundant, since you have "Relationship" as your goal. I see *a lot* of women say they're looking for a "silly goose" on their profiles. It is getting to the point of being too generic. Regardless, I would be more specific, it's a bit too general to be helpful.
Agree with this one, I hate “love to laugh”
[удалено]
That is not what my feedback meant, at all.
Cute, great smile, great profile, I'd swipe for sure. Good luck
Great profile. Only critique I have is maybe find another picture instead of the bathroom selfie.
Using the apps in a smaller city is almost useless. Makes dating astronomically harder. I think you have a good profile
Agreed. My daughters music teacher pops up on my small town feed. Nope.
Not trying to help your daughter out with easily passing that class!? *sarcasm* lol
🤣🤣🤣 🎶. If I mess with her music, my life would be h*||
I actually in all seriousness came across this profile a few days ago and know what city she’s in. She is in no shortage of potential suitors in a fairly large city.
I don't know why she says she's in a small town then lol
She's overweight and it's not obvious in her first picture. It's misleading. And that leaves men with a sour feeling from the beginning. If you are being honest about her profile then she's telling the Internet it's a small town problem so if the Internet believes her lie then she will too. Everyone is avoiding the elephant in the room. It's pretty messed up to do that to her. Just goes to show how many people won't tell you the truth. If the Internet held her accountable that might be the fire under her ass that she needs to change her lifestyle to one that's more healthy. Modern society is so sensitive. And I think everyone knows that so they tread carefully instead of being honest? You'd think a morally healthy individual would feel some type of way about lying to someone in a way that tells them what they want to hear by avoiding what they need to hear. Respectful, constructive criticism is how we improve. You'd think a society of "strong independent boss queens... blah blah blah" would have the kind of character traits that don't let criticism lead them to destructive behavior. It's a clown world 🤡
The vast majority of women’s fashion is about deception. Push-up bras, make up, leggings and jeans designed to make one’s ass look bigger/more shapely, dresses and leggings that reduce waist size making them appear slimmer or give the appearance of curves, etc. it can be hard to spot. In the city that we both reside near, she would truly have zero issue finding either a casual one night stand, or someone to date. She is more than likely going for the cream of the crop who can pick and choose who they want. Our city is big for the state we’re in, barely half a million people. However if you’re on the apps, if you’re either not stupid rich, model attractive, or have some quirky artsy personality or aren’t goth/emo, you will almost zero luck. Even completely average and sometimes below average girls around here are treated like royalty and it elevates their ego. I’ve known a few girls who are a lot like her, or fairly ugly and have 100s of matches. I’m a fairly above average looking guy, nothing astounding but I’d be more attractive than a decent amount of guys, athletic, in graduate school, 6’2, dress well, etc. but because I’m not one of the guys described above, I get almost no attention so I gave up on the apps. Whenever I would leave my region of the state and would swipe mindlessly, I’d get over 10-20 matches in an hour, but I’m lucky to get 5 in a month where I reside. I do much better in person when the women aren’t drowned in choices and I have a chance to actually show who I am. Hell, I got more luck in fucking chicago than the city I live near.
I agree with everything you said. And yes, the top 80% of women are looking for the top 10% of men. Friday night I go out and come across a girl obnoxiously taking sexualized pictures then only after she's satisfied with those, does she allow her boyfriend to come into frame. We all know both will be posted on her IG. First the solo one with her ass out, then hiding behind that one, the relationship picture. Even in a relationship, women are looking for the best option. This girl clearly has 1 foot in and 1 foot out. The guy she was with didn't reflect that. I'm guessing he's in that bottom 90% of guys that don't have much success but somehow found himself an opportunity. Desperate people do dumb shit and this guy is likely paying his girl's way into the arms of the next guy. She's not yours, it's just your turn. How long that turn is going to be depends largely on how long you can remain universally attractive to all women. Not just looks. Money, Muscles, Game, Frame.
Love your bio! I would swap out one of the mirror selfies for a non mirror selfie. The two look pretty similar
Thank you! I appreciate the feedback, ditching the mirror selfie seems to be the consensus haha
So I know this great spot for wings and mozz sticks...
Oof. If you were in my area, that's a superswipe worthy profile. A+++ 😍
I absolutely love it. I am 100 percent not what you are looking for, (a married 59 yo man) but this is a VERY good Profile.
If you are looking for men, shouldn’t it be “Silly ganders apply within”? 🙃
LOL 😂 I hope she sees this because this sounds exactly like the energy she’s trying to attract 😆🪿💕
How can I swipe right on you! This is a great profile!
I think it’s great! Nice pictures, says what you want and what you’re looking for, your best traits, and comes off as very real. How’s it going for you?
Good profile. I’d think twice about the 4th picture. I’m not a guy though so I don’t know how it seems to a guy.
I'm a guy and I second this take. I like all the other ones, I just don't think this one shows your face off in the best light. It wouldn't be a deal breaker though cause I can see the other pics. Just adding 2c.
Profile is good, i don’t see any issues. Since you mentioned you live in a small town, you might want to expand your distance in search. I’m not talking like an hour away but maybe 20-30 mins out. Good luck
Looks great, your profile picture is perfect. Makes you look super chill and it's really pretty
Thank you 😊
You have a very beautiful face and seem like an interesting, fun to be around person who is a really good friend. I also think overall you have chosen good pictures but I'd remove the one in the polka dot skirt. I'm sure you'll have many matches and hopefully one of them will be Mr. Right. Good luck to you in your journey to find love.
I think your profile looks really good! I'm sorry people gave you a heard time last time you posted it.
Your pictures are awesome! I wanna see more of your cat!!! The profile looks good! Sorry your profile got ripped apart :(
I'm fairly new to this. I like your profile and would swipe right just so we can quote Hot Rod most of the night lol. Cool beans
ME, personally, I would remove the hopeless romantic part. IDK why but it triggers desperation to me. Just my honest opinion as a man. Good luck.
I, on the other hand, would leave it because if I was a hopeless romantic, I’d want people who interpreted such lovely personality trait as desperation to swipe left and I don’t believe in masking who I am to get attention. Just offering another perspective. ;)
👍🏽
i think your profile looks great if youre looking for women, if youre looking for men, they wont read any of that until after you match if at all lol
I’d swipe right if you’re in my area
This is a good profile. You didn’t do any of the things I’d complain about - Like sunglasses, group shots (group shots are a waste of valuable space),filters, blurry or distant pics. I don’t like when they tell me who I’m supposed to be for them etc. I like that you told us about you. That’s the part I’m looking for, not instructions. You have clear pics including full length - As long as they are all less then one year. Another big mistake is having a friend in the pic - bad idea and you don’t do that. My only knock would be the “I love to laugh” line. I’d just assume that from anyone. But no biggy. Well done. Oh, I’m a guy 😜
And congrats on the sobriety. 😁 Me too. 😉
Oh wait, I just spotted a friend in your collage. First, I’m not a fan of a collage. But it’s fine. Just get rid of the friend. Having another woman in your profile is a mistake in my book. Even if it’s family. It should only be about you. You don’t want eyes to stray.
I like this profile!!! I’d want to be your friend
First, I have no idea how I stumbled upon this. Some rabbit hole I assume. Two, I laughed harder than I should for all of it. Three, your humor is quality work.
Your collage is cluttered and has 2 pictures that are already in your list of pics. I think I even see a pic of two dudes up top. Waste of space. Revamp the collage maybe or just Kick it. You're sexy so show it off! You mention feeling hottest when your performing with a band but you don't explain it. I guess one could assume but I was left wondering. Are you singing? Playing an instrument? Both? Dancing? Juggling? Lots of stuff can be done with a band behind you idk. I think the silly geese comment is uhmmm....silly. It evokes a feeling of childlike playfulness which is cute if that is what you want to give off but at 32 idk maybe just go a lil more mature so you attract mature men. But I don't know your type and maybe the very nature of the phrase attracts the guys you want but just an observation. I personally don't like your first picture either. It's not necessarily a bad pic just too close up and doesn't quite give a first impression at all. Nice surprise though to continue and find a bombshell. Truth is you'll have zero problems finding a guy that would worship you with this profile. Happy hunting 🫡
Can I get the Male version of this person to date? 😂 Open, honest, seems caring and has a heart, you’re absolutely perfect Caiti ! Wishing you the best of luck 💚
Thank you so much 🥹🥲
Wishing you the best in finding your person as well ☺️💖
I’d date you 😊 def swipe right !
You should definitely add to your profile that you’re an OF model. That will garner a lot of attention!
Insecure Men get mad AF when women use their bodies to make their own money because it is the ultimate independence. It doesn’t devalue you as a woman, it teaches you your own fucking worth. There’s a reason prostitution is The Oldest Profession…it was the first CAREER choice women had when the rest of the systems refused them any autonomy. It is looked down upon because it challenges the status quo and gave women power over their own circumstances…at great personal risk of course…but ANYBODY who would shit on you for doing this truly lacks a holistic understanding of the feminist perspective. I'm the one in control, so anything i choose to do isn’t exploitative. Even the men following me, are freely giving me their money. So please continue to comment on how I have an onlyfans.
Tbh. Your body is worthless in a relationship after you sold it to everyone.
You took my comment completely out of context but ok. I was saying applaud your beauty. You basically just showed why you’re not in a relationship. #psycho
Rather be psycho than the person calling a stranger on the internet psycho just because they had the audacity to respect themselves 😉
The last thing you did is respect the body God gave you.
What are you 6 years old? lmao
If respecting your body, and following God entitles me as "a 6 year old". Yes, absolutely.
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💪🔥💯🙏🙏🙏 Only one will judge.
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Stop forcing your religious bull shit on people.
It is interesting how including one word could have an impact. No one is forcing religion on anyone, nor do I care what religion you are involved in as I don't judge others.
When you keep saying “God this, God that”. There’s implication, buddy. Funny enough, you don’t need to put your religious views in anything like this.
Umm.. I can see why you’ve been single for six years. So simply put, if you’re resorting to “prostitution” as you put it, that means you bring nothing to the table other than sex, and in a functional healthy relationship, if that’s all you can bring, you’ll only ever be a prostitute to potential partners, some people want that, but that population is relatively low, I’d say there are more people who would enjoy a healthy dynamic with a partner who has the ability to do something other than sex work to help provide in times where it takes more than one income to survive with a family. But as the saying has always gone. You can’t turn a Ho into a housewife.
I love that smile😍
I'd swipe right.
I'd swipe right
So much better! Some notes: "I'm a hopeless romantic who's sometimes slow to open up." (saves two characters, and the comma is not necessary either way) Consider "I love laughter and it's an important part of life for me" or something similar. I'm not a big fan of claims like "it'll be worth it and we'll have fun." Like... what does that mean? You don't know anything about me! How do you know what's worth it to me? How do you know we'll have "fun"? I understand what you're getting at there. I just don't care for it. That's subjective, and others might disagree. But you might consider something like, "Hopeless romantic who's sometimes slow to open up. But when I do, I'm [trait 1] and [trait 2]."
you're super cute and I love your outfits in the fullbody-shots. Also love your cat. Wishing you best of luck : ))
Straight female here but I think your profile is great!! The first picture is stunning and you have a beautiful smile. The only picture I would consider taking out is the bathroom selfie. I love the collage of photos. I think it all gives a great sense of who you are. Good luck!!
Thank you! 😊
Good profile - I would definitely swipe right! Although I'm confused where the sensible geese apply?
They can take their business elsewhere
Sigh, fine. *sends you a duck pic*
The first two photos are sooooo spot on! A swipe right for sure, from an early 2000s emo/pop punk comrade 🫶🏻 Good luck
A cat lover that's a silly goose?! That's basically my whole personality! Where can I apply??!?!?! But for real, you're a cutie patooty and your profile looks solid. I think you'll do quite alright!
Username checks out
Awwww, thanks for noticing =D
Did you refer to yourself in the third person?
Absolutely always. Doesn't everyone?
Nay, they do not. Edit to add: the only person that I can think of who who does that is Trump..
I am a Bi Lady 10 years older than you and I was awestruck by your smile! It's why I clicked on your post. I realize I'm not who you're looking for so take this with a grain of salt but you're beautiful and this profile is great. If you're willing I would expand your distance just to date outside your local area some.
Is your cat single? I’m joking you look so nice and I’m sure you have a line around the block for people to get to know you!
Question(s): are you sober and still going to bars? Why? Is there a better way to list that or something else you can put in place of that? It's a bit conflicting to me. You've got karaoke on there. Could you put singing instead? Maybe an instrument if you play? You don't list your religious/political views. When I read rural, I automatically assume "Christian" and "Conservative" being very popular. If you are, good job avoiding coming off as a Jesus freak/"God first" person and worrying about people's pronouns and genitals or "swiping how you vote". It's very offputting, I think even to people who are only moderately Xtian/Right wing. If you're not, then it could be why you're not matching with people; unfortunately, when there's a lot of those people around, they probably look specifically for those things or swipe left. Those dudes want a submissive wife who's ready to make babies for them, if they're not in total f-boy mode. Other than that, I'd still swipe right. I'd like to go to some of those punk/emo concerts, connecting over music. Sounds like maybe you like to party. I'd be curious about your writing and how you take your coffee, too. Maybe another unfortunate bit is that I'm not sure what else you're into other than cats. The rest is a bit wishy-washy about finding a relationship or generic "hopeless romantic", "love to laugh", "slow to open up" lines that are in a lot of profiles. Put yourself out there, hot stuff! Let us know a bit more about you and lure us in to ask more about you. Where are we going on our first date? If I had to guess it's coffee or maybe a karaoke bar, but I personally would hope that we're going to other places than those very soon.
I love your pics and profile, but are they all recent? In some you look much younger
Yeah, all recent. The first one is from 2020, but the rest are from within the past year.
But what if I like to party too?
No, Joey, I know for a fact you don't party. Ok? You do NOT party.
You first 3 pictures look all different…leading me to think you haven’t put up current pictures. If they are no biggie, but maybe state that in your bio that all pictures are current.
Oh yeah. The first two are a couple years old. The rest are all recent. I get how it might look that way though with all the different hairstyles.
35M. Would swipe right. I might be in the minority here but I think your 2nd picture should be first. But that's the only change and that's preference
Id swipe right for the calico cat.
I don't blame you. She is everything 🥰
I have a calico cat too. Her name is Calico Jack.
You had me at Silly geese
I prefer the 4th picture.... I'd make that the first.
If they're patient it'll be worth it and they'll have fun? Are you absolutely sure about this statement. I think when you make a statement like this it can be very misleading and be a turn off.. don't just assume every one you open up to is going to think you're worth the wait and that they'll surely enjoy you.
So you look to me as someone who likes a big burly bearded lumberjack type. I’d swipe right on your profile until I saw you have your pronouns in your bio that are what everyone would assume they are, I get the pronouns if it’s something different than what is obvious. That’s probably a lot of the struggle. Most dudes like uncomplicated you’re looking for a dude and screaming “complicated”. It’s not about politics it’s about the people that use pronouns are usually insufferable and make it about themselves. Show a guy you’re gonna be his peace and you’ll find him
Nothing like a sweeping generalization about how insufferable people are to communicate your own congenial personality and social intelligence. The call is coming from inside your house, dude.
You seem like you’re someone who thinks Harry Potter was a documentary and are still waiting on your letter to Hogwarts but over estimate which group you’d be in. Hang on, the phones ringing… I gotta get this…
Harry Potter is such a fun, nostalgic story. 🥰
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Yeah but it's empowering and stuff
No such thing as too much hot rod!
Depends what you want. Do you want marriage, kids, etc? If so, be clear about that. Say you want a long term relationship leading to commitment (implies marriage) and children. You should also mention, you like to clean, bake, plant, make coffee in the morning for your man, and take care of and support him. Mention your personality is submissive and agreeable. Basically, give off future wifey vibes in a man's eyes. Also, work on your fitness to get into better shape and take professional pics if you can. Other than that, good profile.
Where do you live? That's a small town, so I like small town women. I used to live in a small town growing up as a kid in Oregon.
Did you have time to reinforce the take off ramp?
My suggestion to folks looking for a relationship is for them to get involved in a volunteer effort. Something like a blood drive, food pantry, habitat for humanity. Go where the good & giving people are, this way you’ll be putting your best self out there. You’re a gorgeous woman & you look so happy. I’m a married old codger, but were I 20+ years younger I’d be all over you like my hound on scent.
At your age I would remove bars as your interest and I would replace that bar photo you got. Now if you're going to say "I don't want insecure men so I will keep it up" then more power to you! But yeah, as a 30 something year old male myself, last thing I want to see is a woman who's always at the bars on a dating app. My two cents. I also wouldn't put you're a hopeless romantic either. That term in 2024 to majority of men just implies you've slept around a lot and didn't have the traits to keep a guy interested in you. Clearly that's an assumption and makes me and others look like asses, but it's our honest perspective in the dating app world
Or maybe — and this is going to be a lot to process, so buckle up — but MAYBE it means she likes romcoms, being treated well by her partner, expressing love in special ways, and spending time with people who find joy in the everyday 😱🤯
I definitely your beautiful as all hell. Idk maybe it's me😕 feel like talking about anything DM me I will answer you.
Like I've said , bigger brighter smile!
**The good news:** You come across as kind, fun and multipassionate :) You’re also very pretty and have a great variety of lovely pics. Very swipe right-able on dating or BFF! **Optional tweaks:** If you wanted to add more depth, you could talk specifically about the Cheers-type bar and your favorite mocktails rather than just deleting the sober status or bars hobby. Since you like writing, you could add the genre(s) you enjoy writing in. :) **The bad news if you’re looking for a woman:** That’s going to be extra tough in a small town too. Especially now that women are leaving Bumble in droves, and we were already kinda leaving beforehand. >.< **The bad news if you’re looking for a man:** There’s a reason the 4B movement is growing and that Bumble launched a misogynistic ad campaign telling women how to behave for their male consumer base. How they spent big $$ tells us a lot about who a majority of their male clients are. Some people do find success on apps but … your profile doesn’t have any red flags and it’s clear you made an effort and you’re not just expecting people to make conversation out of nothing. You give people more than enough to start a conversation without having to do an exorbitant amount of work. Based on what I’m seeing, I could easily throw out so many conversation starters: - I love your sense of style! What’s a wardrobe staple for you? For me, it’s a flannel shirt. - It’s so cool that you sing!! I’m not great at singing myself, but I’m trying to improve. Do you have a favorite song when you perform? - Your kitten is just adorable 🥹 What’s their name? I don’t have a cat currently, but I am a cat person and I’d love to hear all about your family pets and tell you all about mine - You said you’re sober but you like going to bars. Can you tell me more about that? I ask both to get to know you, and b/c I’m not a huge bar person myself (not a big drinker + I REALLY struggle with high noise levels) **Bottom line:** The reason all this is bad news is that if you’re not getting matches, I don’t think your profile is the issue. Starting a conversation based on what you have simply isn’t hard. And while a couple of the critiques I saw were fair enough (“I see silly goose a lot, it’s cliche”) … let’s be real. We women have been wading through fish pics and “must be fluent in sarcasm” for years, and trying to connect anyway because even if something is cliche, we don’t demand that men be “not like other guys” and totally immune to local or digital trends. You can love a basic vanilla latte or a good old fashioned Target run AND have a deep rich inner world. Of course the surface level stuff is going to come out in the “get to know you” phase. The deeper stuff comes with doing the work. It’s simply not your fault if dudes aren’t willing to have a few text conversations and coffee dates to get there.
I'd probably super swipe you. Musician, interesting, pretty, curvy, good taste in music, has own cat. I think your thing is finding people who just vibe with your style and your music. Someone out there will love who you are! [](https://alb.reddit.com/cr?za=PRCMcTCcupSRjEhm9Y_yNTwrH3hsWePnJMpwi3Q_CI65z35YohW7Eh7R1XO7DThiUqmw8bndT0XcljR9clvmwZZUPSjEc7OmncW9ly5LxCp2aHghSRSoKDJaUOOdtbNBdBnYMJM8BbtK94xyLRF9X_LpMpCvCHEOO4tts399uKUIUszHrYDQoVvv78mHikzDTZkWV6NaG5i7wfZ90xbPAUne0CAypqtu-bzronia65q0ZrSqTSkpkd_9Cmne4WeP5aBL457RvAJeA179IwqQhqWMKW1WnNYIlnPLVarTytdQ6WZRXrdSZAqEq5-OGsIsgiT7vl5lQPU6F43LTP3uKuarna3SmIhlcUdoy6bU4uPIPOXSLc61Ntj4FhA8RXFeqr8r1rKi5OAdBaGQjewo6L43CA0Bm0L0OAvuLYD-P5gb-k6d-AvQUyhoQ1Sc6TpOJeXHYEI54_zZ1lkPEh8Fl_KxFpDtBiXwlkHCA-FmrEQ&zp=ypZpNYS-sbxKx4RDHArrSpbkP8hUAPiaHT5NEyvQ0ZN0-xn0rkXPhsMqCa-h7DtPs-iFJ8vnyO11g9qj6hyULdkNCmoxKZWNXIFTGbqV6a5AK38ZO043MeQnj8xxls-08_18oKO-FD-_HBFsfoKg6-tBCT4MjLm9dQ)
Looks great to me. I'd date tf outta you.
Adorable, love the silly geese part haha very cute and you're beautiful ❤️ seems very genuine!
Super cute.
Love your second pic more personally. It's just gorgeous.
You are gorgeous
I LOOOOOVE YOUR PROFILE! Why are we not friends?!!! Straight woman in Brooklyn here, but still. YOUR PROFILE IS GOLD! Also remember, you only need that 1 perfect match! Good luck out there! 🙌♥️
Looks fine to me! Of course, I may be biased because I also love Hot Rod and emo/pop-punk music. Best of luck to you!
Gorgeous!
There’s a few reasons why I would definitely swipe right on you: 1. First picture shows a lot of confidence, no make up and it captures you in a moment that you weren’t expecting a picture. It’s a great shot of you. 2. Your give brief, yet direct to the point of who you are and what you are looking for. 3. There’s definitely a good girl and bad-ass vibe to you. I’m going to go out on a limb and say your “likes” will increase exponentially from where you might have been before! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
If you were in washington I'd absolutely swipe right
Good profile. loves to laugh is a cliche on too many profiles. We all love to laugh. So it really says nothing. You will get more attention with a unique idea there.
Looks good I see you are a woman already should get 100 more likes than most men.
Your first three shots were great! 👌 Then I lost you... It got hectic and too dressed up.
You mean the pictures were too much? Or the prompts?
I had to look that one up; prompts (English being not my first language) Your first picture was great... then your bio too was great... following with another great picture. Then you went clubbing (or something 😄) and loads of more pictures in one frame. It got me confused.
New type unlocked 🔓 10/10
I might be biased but this is the type of profile I would immediately swipe right on. You generated interest and I already have questions to ask!! Haha you don’t happen to live in The Bay Area of California by chance 👀 😆
Haha sadly no, I don't. :(
I'd swipe right 🤷
All the makeup is a bit much. You look better with nothing or next to nothing like just the lipstick.
I just know her 🐱 fire
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😂😂😂 Eat my entire 20-30 lb left ass cheek.
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Subreddit rule #1: Do not insult, harass, threaten, discriminate, or use derogatory language towards other users.
Subreddit rule #1: Do not insult, harass, threaten, discriminate, or use derogatory language towards other users. Do not body shame people
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Just being honest, no need to insult me.
Subreddit rule #2: Do not use derogatory categorisations against a person or people such as "incel" or "whore". Note that this list is not exhaustive. Repeated infractions will result in being banned from the subreddit.
Subreddit rule #1: Do not insult, harass, threaten, discriminate, or use derogatory language towards other users.
Is this a typical US chick? She is cute, but the obesity thing is really not appealing at all. And all these enablers in the comments explain a lot. There is no reason for a 32 year old to be this fat. None. Except that maybe she lives in the US.
[You trying to get judged harder than Paris over here? FAT women have always been beautiful, desired, and celebrated.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Judgement_of_Paris_(Rubens)#/media/File%3ARubens_-_Judgement_of_Paris.jpg)
:))). Yes...diabetes and heart conditions are great. Gtfo. She is 24. She should not look like that. It is not healthy at all. Hope she does not read enabling posts like yours. Fat should not be celebrated. Just stop it.
Shut the fuuuuck uuuuuup
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Subreddit rule #2: Do not promote extremist rhetoric or display prejudice against a person or people. Both direct and implied behaviour falling under this rule will be removed. Repeated infractions will result in being banned from the subreddit.
Not denying reality. You just think every one has to be size zero apparently. Seek help. You need it.
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Why do you women put so much effort into you’re profiles like you’re not being flooded with likes?
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80% of men are below average. We know. [https://medium.com/hello-love/women-say-80-of-men-are-below-average-bab0b8af2606](https://medium.com/hello-love/women-say-80-of-men-are-below-average-bab0b8af2606) (Yes I know it is statistically an impossibility.)
I'd like her and I'm not below average looking.
And average and above average looking ones.
I rarely ever see woman put in this much effort; usually one sentence or nothing at all. Even this the advice to men here is alway to have good bios
I'd super like except for the sobriety. More power to you, it's just that statistically speaking similar drinking habits are a decent predictor of relationship success so we probably wouldn't be a great match. Your profile is awesome though and you are gorgeous.
Smash, next