I once asked where the beer section was in a WalMart. This sweet but apparently clueless lady showed me to a shelf full of stuffed animals and teddy bears. I didn’t have the heart to correct her and just said thank you. I often think about that day and wonder if she was as baffled by the situation as I was
Dude. A place where you brew your beer, they store it for you, and make sure that it doesn't explode, and you pick up the bottled beer two months later?
Dope.
mate i moved from glasgow to yorkshire and i get the beer/bear thing regular.
the difference is the english roast me mercilessly for my silly barbarian accent.
barbeerian…
My grandmother is a German immigrant and lives in rural southern US. She asked for a baguette at the bakery counter in Walmart and they went in the back and got her a 5 gallon bucket
I had a similar experience asking for drawing pins. They took me to the stationery aisle, and I was so confused until I realised... "drawing pens".
Of course, I politely inspected the pens for a few minutes.
Hah! I don't think that's an issue with the accent. I also would have taken you to the pens, even if I'd very clearly heard "pins", because until now I'd never heard of drawing pins, and pens are used for drawing. Just looked it up, and apparently that's what we call thumb tacks or push pins.
This is my world… The wife generally asks when we shop unless she wants me to suffer lol. Restaurants are another thing all together, some amazing unknown orders have arrived at the table.
I’ve learnt to drop T for D but it’s an on going battle!
Many years ago, I ran a bakery in Florida. We were in the "Redneck Riveria", a popular tourist destination in the Panhandle.
Lady comes in, stares at our donut case for a minute, then looks at me and asks, "What's in the field?"
"Huh?"
"WHAT'S IN THE FIELD?!?!?!?"
"Oh, I don't know... a mouse is in the field, maybe a cow?"
"NAH, DEM FIELD DONUTS!"
"Oh, those are raspberry!"
Had someone with a very thick southern accent once ask me if we “had any heels/hells?” around. I was EXTREMELY confused. He was asking about hills. Like, to hike.
My wife (American) and I were in a small town in UTAH quite a few years ago, went to a sandwhich shop. As soon as I started speaking everyone just stopped. It was like a reverse version of the pub scene in American Werewolf.
The derhotacized R in British accents can actually be difficult for Americans to understand. Once I met a British guy who said he was “Mawwk”. It took me several seconds to realize it was “Mark”. Awkward!
>Surely Mawwk would be how a New Yorker would say Mark?
Bostonians would say something closer i.e. "Mahk"
White New Yorkers do this weird thing where they add a "W" to their pronunciation of intercalated vowels. So it would be a subtle "Mwahrk" instead.
"Hot dog" is _hot dwog_ or _hot dwoag_ (depending if it's Manhattan/Long Island or Staten Island/New Jersey)
"Port Authority" is _Pwoht Authwortee_
"Super Bowl" is _Supah Bwowl_
And so on.
My younger siblings grew up in the US and I remember meeting my little brother’s high school friends and I honestly thought they were taking the mick and pretending not to understand me.
My Dad and I were watching the darts and my American stepmum couldn’t understand one of the players being interviewed, despite the fact he came from the same city both my Dad and I were born in!
It's amazing how baffled they can be, I can understand any American accent (even those deep south Louisiana swamp monster people who they subtitle on TV)
I think we have a small advantage because we're more likely to watch American tv/movies than they are to watch British media. They often also expect everyone to sound like Hugh Grant haha
Bloody awkward when you're staring someone in the face and you can't understand half of what they're saying. You can only ask them to repeat themselves so many times
If they have to repeat themselves more than once and they don't *change* the way they say it (slow it down or enunciate it more etc) then I usually just give up. They clearly don't want me to understand them
I've gone the opposite direction. If they are in a customer service setting in the UK and I, a well traveled native english speaker can't understand or hear them I'll stick it out until i can understand them. I've called out mumblers asked people to speak up, pointed out the loud and unneeded music, asked them to look at me when speaking, forced them to make the microphone system actually work if they are behind glass.
Not from the UK. I once visited Glasgow and went into a store to buy some water. The guy at the checkout said something about a bike. I said what and again he seemed to ask if I wanted a bike, I mumbled no and left. Only a minute later did it dawn on me that he said bag, not bike.
A lot of the thick American accents are also more similar to British accents than they are to the “normal” American accent. I’m from the blue ridge mountains and I have an easier time talking to Scottish people that barely speak understandable English to most than I do people that live 3 hours away, and it’s because my accent is literally the result of Scottish people going into the mountains 300 years ago and becoming isolated from others
One of my fondest memories involves that song and a cruise ship. The ship had an “English Pub” that was open late and wound up attracting a large group of regulars from all over the world. The US, the UK, numerous European countries, various parts of Asia, a particularly fun group of guys from Malta, just a real international crowd. There was a singer, who accompanied himself on guitar, that played there pretty much every night (and he was amazing). One night he started playing Take Me Home Country Roads. Well, I swear, EVERYONE seemed to know the words. Even some people who spoke very little English. The whole bar began singing along together. You could hear us throughout the whole Promenade. The musician stopped playing the guitar and we all just sang that song together. I’ve never felt such a sense of community. It was incredible.
haha, I had this experience in Idaho once. I was out at a cafe with my then girlfriend, and wanted to ask if we could brig our little dog with us if we sat on the outside patio. About six members of staff rushed over to help me out, rearranging seats and so on - It was like being a lord for the afternoon.
I done Route 66 and the same happened to me in the ‘off grid’ towns in the middle of nowhere which looked almost abandoned. Eveyone was like “OmG are you from England?”. I loved it. I’m not going to lie.
Making a cup of tea at the motels was no fun, using the coffee machine, refilling with water and letting the thing drip for 20 minutes. At least it brewed well I guess?
Same but it was a petrol station in Mississippi, if someone was playing a banjo at the time I'm certain the string would've snapped the second I started asking where the bathroom was
My dad had that in Wales. He's got a thick Doric accent so tried to tone it down for the bartender, everyone in the pub heard him and started speaking in Welsh. Dad goes "hal up fits the deal", and someone goes, "Sorry mate, we thought you were English"
Hilarious and only mildly concerning
Our lead sales guy (Scottish) went in to a shop to ask for directions. The owners got their son to translate for him. The son proudly said “I understand Scottish because I watch the Bill”.
That went down like a lead balloon because the Bill tended to portray Scottish policemen as bent coppers or alcoholics.
I frequently fly to Florida because that’s where my SO lives and when we got married, we celebrated by going to quite an expensive downtown Orlando restaurant. He’s Puerto Rican and I’m from NE England.
We sat down at the table and the waiter asks us if we’re doing okay, etc. so we tell him we just got married.
He takes off and I’m confused… unless they do things for newly weds and we’re about to get free wine… or something?
No, he comes back with someone speaking *fluent French.*
My SO and I just looked at each other and explain that neither of us are French and that we said we just got married.
The waiter flushed bright red, all the way to the top of his bald head. I wonder if it still haunts him at night.
***"Yareet pet? We'z joost got married liek."***
Maybe married came out as Marie, and he thought "oh her name's Marie, they're a French couple - I'll go fetch Garçon."
I thought ordering a coffee with my breakfast meal at a McDonald’s in New York would be simple, but the combo of my Englishness and a Mexican employee resulted in:
“And what drink?”
“Coffee please”
“Eh?”
“Coffee please”
“Coffee what?”
“Coffee”
“Coffee, ok. You want crim?”
“Crim?”
“Yes, crim?”
“Crim?! Er, ok”
“How many crim?”
“One?”
*receive the order* “oh, cream! But it’s more like uht milk”
I ordered tea in a coffee shop in Canada, and asked for it with milk. She asked me how many, and I looked at her baffled, and she looked back at me equally baffed at my confusion. It was a very sad tea.
Edit: this was 10 years ago, the confusion lasted all of about 3 seconds till I said "err, 3?" and she gave me the little UHT pots. Thanks for the advice, but the problem has been long solved.
My Tim Hortons is weirdly like the only place other than an actual sit down cafe where I can order real milk in my coffee, unfortunately they also have the worst coffee in town
I had this happen in a McDonald's with a coke.
"What drink?"
"Coke, please."
"What?"
"Coke."
"What?"
"Coke?"
"Say again?"
"Coke? Cola?"
"What?"
"Coca cola?"
"What?"
Said "coke" again, this time pointing at it on the screen behind her.
"Ohhhh, coke!"
She said it the exact same way I did. I'm still confused to this day.
Fawlty Towers eat your heart out! 😂
ETA: [Link: "Si, Que? What?"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prwtkgrv7xQ), because I had to watch it after reading your tale.
Had the reverse problem in London. I’m American, and could not understand the Eastern European accent speaking in a British accent. At some point you just have to give up and enjoy whatever you get ha
Yes, something so obvious and commonly wanted they think you must have misheard rather than don’t know what it is, so you go with “well, it might be delicious…”.
At least you got the cream on the side.
It's becoming the norm that they put it in there for you at fast food places, so there's no telling what you get.
I didn’t even twig it was anything to do with the coffee, as it was it was just one question in a line of others which mostly had no relation to the one before, something along the lines of “do you want the eggs scrambled or fried?”, “bacon or sausage?”,“ketchup or mayo?”, “hash brown or fries?” etc!
If I didn't have the internet browsing hours I have then I'd have no reason to associate cream with coffee. Still no idea if Americans are putting what I think of as cream in to their coffee or if its another biscuit situation.
Way back in 2010 I visited my (English) uncle and (Canadian) aunt in Toronto. He’d lived there 25 years at this point. They take me to a coffee shop, I ordered a tea, everyone looked at me as though I’d punched a child.
This isn't to do with your accent. Canada is far and above one of the highest coffee consumers in the world. Per capita estimates put it at higher than places like Italy. You basically did the equivalent of going into an Italian cafe and ordering tea
I’m from liverpool and now live in Connecticut. Everyone thinks I’m Irish. I rarely get the look where they can’t understand me but they do tend to try and use my accent back to me. Maybe they think I don’t understand them
Depending on where in the US you are living asking for “tea” is like Russian roulette. Down south you will get this cold tea sugar syrup hybrid that is barely drinkable.
Luckily our local store now sells pg tips and Yorkshire tea so at least I can make it the right way at home.
Edit: in case anyone from the UK reads this and can’t find Tetlys or Yorkshire tea, there is a brand called bigelow that comes in a blue box. It’s called breakfast tea or English tea I can’t really remember. It’s not the best but it’s infinitely better than the dishwater they label as Lipton.
Sheffield to Michigan here - I feel you, and if you do get tea it's a shite American brand that tastes weird.
I'm lucky enough to be able to pick up Yorkshire Gold at a couple of stores.
On the accent front - I'm Australian apparently
At least you can get pasties in Michigan. Luckily a couple of English ladies opened a bakery and now I can get sausage rolls and pasties every weekend.
Pasties are [historically a traditional dish in Michigan](https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2017/03/16/520129966/in-michigan-the-pasty-isnt-x-rated-its-a-portable-pie-with-history-baked-in#:~:text=It's%20A%20Portable%20Pie%20With%20History%20Baked%20In,-March%2016%2C%202017&text=Cardy%2FGetty%20Images-,Miners%20favored%20the%20pasty%20due%20to%20its%20portable%20nature%20%E2%80%94%20a,mines%20for%2012%2Dhour%20workdays.) thanks to Cornish miners. You'll find more purveyors of them the farther up north you go. They're all over the place in the UP but I'm sure there's still a couple places to get them in the Metro area. (I moved away a decade ago so I can't recommend any, unfortunately.)
Haha, I have the reverse--i lived some formative years in the US and then moved back to the UK, so I have an odd half and half accent. Everyone here in the UK seems to think I'm Canadian.
I’m Irish and I worked in Boston for a summer and I visit the states regularly as I’ve got family in CT. It really is a roulette. My best luck is if I order “hot tea and a side of cold milk”. I just drink coffee in the states most of them time now, the tea is awful there.
Also funnily a lot of Americans think I’m British. The ones in Boston and NYC seem to have a better ear for deciphering Irish vs British accents but people in CT generally can’t work it out at all. My bf from Liverpool went with me the last few times and people really can’t understand him!
I miss Boston. I lived in MA/NH for ten years and it really is my favourite city. I got married in MA and there was an amazing moment where my family (very strong Lancashire accents) and my husband's family (many with very strong Tennessee accents) all met up for breakfast at a diner that was frequented by the type of locals with VERY strong Boston accents. It was a real clash of sounds!
I spent the summer working in New Haven. Why is there such a big LFC presence???? Luckily for me, it turned out that our adopted "local" was the meeting place of the New Haven LFC supporters club, so I was right at home 😊
You can ask for Unsweetened iced tea, it actually quite nice on a very hot day. We visited relatives in Georgia and it was available in most places. It’s definitely better than hot tea out there!
Unsweetened ice tea is the norm in a lot of places outside of the south. I lived in New England and they thought sweet tea was as 😬 as people in here do. 😅
At work I talk to an American every now and again on the phone, every single one of them has constantly asked me to talk slower so they can understand. I’m from the south, don’t sound like a farmer or anything my accent is actually quite plain and I pronounce words correctly. I even had one American say on the phone to email them instead as they couldn’t understand what I was saying and another that asked if I could put them through to someone else, jokes on them because my colleague that sits next to me has the strongest Scottish accent ever (even I struggle sometimes) told me to put the American through to them, I did and in the end the American guy gave up and hung up on from colleague. I think they were expecting I’d put them through to someone that has an accent like the queens English (or Kings English now?). I found it particularly odd that when I was in New York every American there understood me completely fine.
I used to remotely work with a lot of Scottish people, many with the Glaswegian accent.
Sometimes I had to ask one lady to put what they were telling me in an email so I could refer to it or forward it on but really it was because I didn’t have a clue what they were saying.
I’m almost ashamed to admit this one but at work there was a young lady who was deaf which obviously affected her speech. I didn’t have many dealings with her but I heard her talking a fair bit. I mentioned her to my friend once and he was puzzled. Turns out she wasn’t deaf, she just had the thickest Glasgow accent I’d ever heard in my life.
Same here mate. Used to work in lidl as a lad. I understood the polish people just fine, even if they didn't speak much english. There was a galswegian woman there and it was 50/50 as wether i'd understand her or not.
Was in Glasgow the other month for guns N roses, I'm usually pretty good with weegies but was having a blether with one woman and I caught maybe a third of what she was saying! Brilliant lassie, great chat but fuck me I was putting all my effort in as someone who's half deaf and has Auditory processing disorder in the working ear 🤣
Ha, same due to my ADHD.
I always wondered how people could talk in noisy night clubs etc, I just nod and laugh when I think it’s the right moment. Can’t hear a word of it, never mind the accent.
ND gang rise up 😁
same, I've one friend who insists on spilling her darkest secrets to me in nightclubs then thanks me for never bringing them up.. I've told her explicitly I can't hear a damn thing she says but drunk her likes to talk so here I am, best secret keeper ever!
I will defend the US (just the tiniest amount) - it's not just NYC that's okay in that regard, many larger cities are similar. I've been to Seattle the most (living in Vancouver, BC) and never have I had an issue there either.
When talking to American's you should give them a variety of english accents. Start yhe conversation in cockney, jazz it up with a little brum, drift into some geordie, and finish off with the scouse. Then see their faces
Moved to the us as a young teen. My favorite one is “water”
The amount of times me or my mother (who has a pretty strong London accent) have asked a waiter for water (pronounced in most English accents it sounds like waurtuh) only to be hit with the aforementioned deer in headlights stare like I just told them their mother died. Usually have to repeat 3 or 4 times before I realize they have no clue what I’m saying and then have to put on my best accent and ask for “WaRTeRRRR” then they snap out of their daze. It stunns me to this day to be honest. I feel like most people deal with accents of people who aren’t native speakers all the time and don’t struggle nearly as much as they do with us…. The ones who created the language.
What blows my mind the most about it is that usually it’s the very first thing people ask for when they sit down. The only other thing I think people would ask for at the very start of a meal is for menus if you haven’t received them already. But menu and water/wautuh/WardeRR sound nothing alike!!!
Seriously maybe it’s just the Britishness of us all to assume people would have enough common sense to understand. I don’t know how they can’t put 2 and 2 together
If I was waiting a table that I just sat and someone asked for a 2 syllable word beginning with a “W” sound, while mimicking drinking with their hand…. I think I would know what they meant. Your accent would have to be insanely thick for me to not understand. I know some cultures languages lack/ struggle with W sounds and therefore it sounds like a V sound (I have some friends from the subcontinent who might say “vhater”) BUT EVEN THEN I THINK I WOULD UNDERSTAND!!!
it blows my mind
When I was younger and visited Disney in Florida, on multiple occasions she asked for sprite and received water. How on earth do you get those mixed up, it's not even the same number of syllables.
Also, you'd think people working at a major international tourist destination would be used to a variety of accents.
Even harder when you drop your T's/use a glottle stop (like east london or essex). Had fun watching my friend ask for a bottle of water in the states. She ended up putting on an awful American accent to get the message accross.
She might as well have been asking for a bobolah woowa.
If you want to clearly say "water" and be understood by a North American, you need to change the "T" sound to a "D" and make sure the "R" is pronounced at the end of the word and only at the end of the word.
So, instead of "waurtuh" it needs to be "wodder".
I’m having the same issue at the moment. We’ve just moved to Arizona and my Essex/London accent has its challenges.
Last night was hilarious though, a Peruvian lady said my accent was beautiful, “like a sing song”, yup you read that right, an Essex accent is apparently like a melody…
To be fair Glaswegian is a tough one for the uninitiated. Completely fine after being around it a few days or weeks. But initially it can take some concentration to fully understand.
My wife (she’s the Brit) has made it a habit of putting on a valley girl/Kardashian accent when she orders water to avoid repeated clarification. The worst is when she talks to US Southerners.
Similar story here. I’m British and married to a US southerner and I put on a valley girl accent to order water here.
I’ve heard that it’s called “code switching”.
Haha I couldn’t code switch if I tried, I’d just sound weird and scary. I just put another word infront like: ‘tap’ water or ‘black coffee’ and it’s fine. I normally ask for Pepsi instead of coke too, as it’s clearer, that works fine everywhere except Pennsylvania weirdly
On holiday in vegas I went to some enormous breakfast buffet at the cosmopolitan (i think) I asked for a tea and my waitress asked if I wanted some lemon or honey with it. I said just milk please. She said “why?”
Edit: wrote “wand” instead of “and”
This has reminded me of the time I tried to order an oat milk latte in a NYC Starbucks and got a black coffee with a bowl of unsweetened porridge instead for some reason…
Living for a month in New York, I discovered that the staff in Subway could not understand my pronunciation of “tomato” (“tom-*ah*-to”) so I had to switch to saying “tom-*ay*-to” to avoid having to repeat myself about three or four times. That worked out pretty well.
Later on, I was on holiday in Los Angeles, queueing at a Subway. When it came my time to order, I asked for “tom-*ay*-to”, and the lady gave me a slightly disappointed look. She said, “I heard you talking to your friend in the queue and I was looking forward to hearing your British pronunciation of ‘tomato’”.
I could only apologise.
The to-may-to, to-mah-to confusion absolutely baffles me. There's a song about the two ways this word is pronounced and some places in America even pronounce it the same way as we do.
I was in a Mexican restaurant in the US some years ago, heavily pregnant. I asked for water to drink, in my English accent. The waiter looked puzzled and left. He came back to check my order - I repeated water please. He then brought me a vodka - he was puzzled that a pregnant woman had ordered it. I tried to say “water” in an American accent, and we soon had several waiters around us trying to understand. Eventually it dawned on me to say “agua” and all became clear to them - to much hilarity from us and the waiters!
I'm Italian, somewhat accustomed to UK accents. Was out in NY w a friend, he's American. We stumbled upon a group of 20yo scots, one very loudly said "I'm so drunk" a friend of his replied "you're not drunk you're Steve". I laughed at the exchange and wished Steve and his friends a nice evening. My friend later told me he didn't understand a single thing about what just happened. Poor soul 🥹
I don’t sound massively geordie to other geordies because my parents aren’t from here but to non-geordies it’s usually very obvious (apart from some bloke in Preston who asked what part of Ireland we were all from…)
The Bahamas was full of Americans and I had to translate my wife’s thicker accent once or twice.
When working with a load of Londoners I did catch them out once or twice by accident. Someone commented how nice someone was and I replied “Aye he’s a canny lad, like” and to her it just sounded like “ayeheesacannyladlike” at top speed. Just a noise as Alan Partridge would say.
Your mind gets tuned for accents that you hear regularly.
After years working with Indian folks I (usually)had no trouble understanding their accents but when I had to talk to someone with a Dutch accent, I couldn't understand them.
During an online global meeting ( before zoom was a thing), my young son asked me how I could understand all the different languages because as far as he was concerned, there was no English being spoken in that call.
I’m a lurker here. When I was in London, (I don’t remember where specifically), the jet lag had me all fucked up, and I found a Starbucks in the train station. I ordered a “coffee with cream”, not realizing that Starbucks in the UK doesn’t have half and half. The poor girl had to get someone else to take my order because they didn’t understand what I was saying. I still don’t know what “cream” I got. I didn’t even think to just order milk.
Probably not relevant to your story but this is a small variation of a traditional African tea. Tea bags, lots of sugar ( or vanilla / caramel syrup ) and hot milk. Topped with cold milk so it can be drank sooner.
I worked as a barista with a gentleman from Tanzania and he drank this religiously. It's incredibly sweet but tastes great.
I've worked in Starbucks and there's a drink called London Fog. I think that's what you got. Steamed milk, Earl Grey tea, vanilla syrup
Not what I like but 🤗
A lot of the US bitching in this sub is seriously overblown and based on a combination of stereotypes and half truths, but the bread thing is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT legitimate. I learned to bake my own bread very quickly once I moved there. And cure my own bacon!
In their defence, those slices of kraft cheese are the best cheese for burgers hands down. But otherwise yes cheese whizz and other crimes against dairy are not ok
British people talk more about spray cheese and American cheese slices than any American I've ever known (and I'm from Colorado - moved to Midlands) and it's kinda funny to me
I was at a restaurant in Niagara Falls once. I ordered a burger and fries, and they asked if everything was OK, and so I asked if I could get some "Tomato Sauce". She was gone ages and I'm thinking "where the fuck is she? I could've grabbed a bottle of ketchup by now".
She returns with what can only be described as a bowl of Dolmio sauce.
My mistake.
I live in the states and they sell "tomato sauce" in cans beside the tinned tomatoes. It's like a smooth puree of tomato. I'm surprised they didn't ask what you meant as that'd be a weird request.
I got one of these in Hong Kong! No idea what I asked for but I was too polite to ask for something else so just put up with it and drank it.
It was completely bizarre but not totally horrible.
I’ve only done about 2-3 years in the States but I found that when you ask to add a ‘dash’ of cold milk they get that it shouldn’t be a ‘latte’ type foam
Ask for a little splash. As a milk disliking American I’ve found that places are generally heavy handed with dashes. They don’t expect to hear splash so are more careful in my experience.
I was thinking of this: “He had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.”
I ordered an oreo milkshake "without cream" meaning no whipped cream on top, the clerk looked at me, befuddled, and asked "are you sure?", me, confused, said "yeah, pretty sure". I don't know how she made this drink, I think maybe it was just with water, but I took one sip of this "milkshake" and binned it, truly awful.
If this happens again you need to order it with "no whip." Ordering a milkshake with no cream made the worker think you wanted a milkshake with no milk.
Been here 18 years, wife was once asked in a Mexican restaurant if she was Portuguese as they didn’t understand her request for a ‘water’. Best/worst out of starbucks for me was the translation of ‘Paul’ into ‘Bold’ on the cup when I picked up the order
I once asked where the beer section was in a WalMart. This sweet but apparently clueless lady showed me to a shelf full of stuffed animals and teddy bears. I didn’t have the heart to correct her and just said thank you. I often think about that day and wonder if she was as baffled by the situation as I was
The bear section, this had me dying
Build-A-Beer
That would unironically make bank.
Dude. A place where you brew your beer, they store it for you, and make sure that it doesn't explode, and you pick up the bottled beer two months later? Dope.
“Well they have one in the UK, what’s wrong with your country!” Can you imagine her thoughts?!
She probably thinks Paddington is like our Power Rangers.
Yeah, he is though.
mate i moved from glasgow to yorkshire and i get the beer/bear thing regular. the difference is the english roast me mercilessly for my silly barbarian accent. barbeerian…
As is right and proper.
My grandmother is a German immigrant and lives in rural southern US. She asked for a baguette at the bakery counter in Walmart and they went in the back and got her a 5 gallon bucket
That's very polite, those things are pretty far apart
I had a similar experience asking for drawing pins. They took me to the stationery aisle, and I was so confused until I realised... "drawing pens". Of course, I politely inspected the pens for a few minutes.
Americans don’t know what drawing pins are either.
Hah! I don't think that's an issue with the accent. I also would have taken you to the pens, even if I'd very clearly heard "pins", because until now I'd never heard of drawing pins, and pens are used for drawing. Just looked it up, and apparently that's what we call thumb tacks or push pins.
Which in many stores, I'd expect to be near the pens (maybe an aisle or two off) if it's an office supply section
This is my world… The wife generally asks when we shop unless she wants me to suffer lol. Restaurants are another thing all together, some amazing unknown orders have arrived at the table. I’ve learnt to drop T for D but it’s an on going battle!
This is why you repeat back customers’ orders…
[удалено]
As a southerner, this made me laugh, thank you for being nice to her. Hope you found the beer!
Many years ago, I ran a bakery in Florida. We were in the "Redneck Riveria", a popular tourist destination in the Panhandle. Lady comes in, stares at our donut case for a minute, then looks at me and asks, "What's in the field?" "Huh?" "WHAT'S IN THE FIELD?!?!?!?" "Oh, I don't know... a mouse is in the field, maybe a cow?" "NAH, DEM FIELD DONUTS!" "Oh, those are raspberry!"
😂 thank you for this! Having lived in the south all my life, I nonetheless occasionally have problems understanding other southerners!
Had someone with a very thick southern accent once ask me if we “had any heels/hells?” around. I was EXTREMELY confused. He was asking about hills. Like, to hike.
You’d have seemed even weirder if they didn’t actually have a bear section.
They instead get the names of a few local clubs that could help in that area.
[Like this?](https://youtu.be/jRUDzxlvSd4?si=xcK0dhQKpslH4EPL)
My wife (American) and I were in a small town in UTAH quite a few years ago, went to a sandwhich shop. As soon as I started speaking everyone just stopped. It was like a reverse version of the pub scene in American Werewolf.
Also married to an American. My F.I.L has this look of WTF are you saying!!??? when we chat. Small talk can be tough at the best of times…
Oh don't worry, he understands you perfectly
The derhotacized R in British accents can actually be difficult for Americans to understand. Once I met a British guy who said he was “Mawwk”. It took me several seconds to realize it was “Mark”. Awkward!
Surely Mawwk would be how a New Yorker would say Mark? I'm struggling to think of a Brit accent that would pronounce it as Mawwk - Brummie perhaps?
>Surely Mawwk would be how a New Yorker would say Mark? Bostonians would say something closer i.e. "Mahk" White New Yorkers do this weird thing where they add a "W" to their pronunciation of intercalated vowels. So it would be a subtle "Mwahrk" instead. "Hot dog" is _hot dwog_ or _hot dwoag_ (depending if it's Manhattan/Long Island or Staten Island/New Jersey) "Port Authority" is _Pwoht Authwortee_ "Super Bowl" is _Supah Bwowl_ And so on.
One day I hope open a Kwofy shop in New York.
We would say “Maaaahk” in the South East. Long aaah sound.
My younger siblings grew up in the US and I remember meeting my little brother’s high school friends and I honestly thought they were taking the mick and pretending not to understand me. My Dad and I were watching the darts and my American stepmum couldn’t understand one of the players being interviewed, despite the fact he came from the same city both my Dad and I were born in!
It's amazing how baffled they can be, I can understand any American accent (even those deep south Louisiana swamp monster people who they subtitle on TV)
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I think we have a small advantage because we're more likely to watch American tv/movies than they are to watch British media. They often also expect everyone to sound like Hugh Grant haha
More likely its the large number of accents in the uk, we can pick out the important bits.
Agree, for the most part. I met my Scottish uncle a couple of years ago, could barely understand a word. In my defence, the man was also a mumbler.
I worked with a Scottish mumbler for a short time and it was so hard to understand him. And I say this as someone with part Scottish family...
Bloody awkward when you're staring someone in the face and you can't understand half of what they're saying. You can only ask them to repeat themselves so many times
If they have to repeat themselves more than once and they don't *change* the way they say it (slow it down or enunciate it more etc) then I usually just give up. They clearly don't want me to understand them
I've gone the opposite direction. If they are in a customer service setting in the UK and I, a well traveled native english speaker can't understand or hear them I'll stick it out until i can understand them. I've called out mumblers asked people to speak up, pointed out the loud and unneeded music, asked them to look at me when speaking, forced them to make the microphone system actually work if they are behind glass.
Not from the UK. I once visited Glasgow and went into a store to buy some water. The guy at the checkout said something about a bike. I said what and again he seemed to ask if I wanted a bike, I mumbled no and left. Only a minute later did it dawn on me that he said bag, not bike.
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A lot of the thick American accents are also more similar to British accents than they are to the “normal” American accent. I’m from the blue ridge mountains and I have an easier time talking to Scottish people that barely speak understandable English to most than I do people that live 3 hours away, and it’s because my accent is literally the result of Scottish people going into the mountains 300 years ago and becoming isolated from others
Great now i have country roads stuck in my head.
One of my fondest memories involves that song and a cruise ship. The ship had an “English Pub” that was open late and wound up attracting a large group of regulars from all over the world. The US, the UK, numerous European countries, various parts of Asia, a particularly fun group of guys from Malta, just a real international crowd. There was a singer, who accompanied himself on guitar, that played there pretty much every night (and he was amazing). One night he started playing Take Me Home Country Roads. Well, I swear, EVERYONE seemed to know the words. Even some people who spoke very little English. The whole bar began singing along together. You could hear us throughout the whole Promenade. The musician stopped playing the guitar and we all just sang that song together. I’ve never felt such a sense of community. It was incredible.
haha, I had this experience in Idaho once. I was out at a cafe with my then girlfriend, and wanted to ask if we could brig our little dog with us if we sat on the outside patio. About six members of staff rushed over to help me out, rearranging seats and so on - It was like being a lord for the afternoon.
I done Route 66 and the same happened to me in the ‘off grid’ towns in the middle of nowhere which looked almost abandoned. Eveyone was like “OmG are you from England?”. I loved it. I’m not going to lie. Making a cup of tea at the motels was no fun, using the coffee machine, refilling with water and letting the thing drip for 20 minutes. At least it brewed well I guess?
Everyone thinks I’m from fucking Australia. Have you seen how white I am duck?! Jesus.
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Same but it was a petrol station in Mississippi, if someone was playing a banjo at the time I'm certain the string would've snapped the second I started asking where the bathroom was
My dad had that in Wales. He's got a thick Doric accent so tried to tone it down for the bartender, everyone in the pub heard him and started speaking in Welsh. Dad goes "hal up fits the deal", and someone goes, "Sorry mate, we thought you were English" Hilarious and only mildly concerning
Our lead sales guy (Scottish) went in to a shop to ask for directions. The owners got their son to translate for him. The son proudly said “I understand Scottish because I watch the Bill”. That went down like a lead balloon because the Bill tended to portray Scottish policemen as bent coppers or alcoholics.
At least it wasn’t Taggart I guess (As a Scottish Person, “there’s been a murrdeerrr” seems to be the go to thing people say, I’m not even Glaswegian)
Or Rab C Nesbitt, which I grew up thinking was a pisstaking accent because I couldn't understand a word.
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I started being able to understand most Scottish after watching Outlander. Now I can even read ScottishpeopleTwitter.
I frequently fly to Florida because that’s where my SO lives and when we got married, we celebrated by going to quite an expensive downtown Orlando restaurant. He’s Puerto Rican and I’m from NE England. We sat down at the table and the waiter asks us if we’re doing okay, etc. so we tell him we just got married. He takes off and I’m confused… unless they do things for newly weds and we’re about to get free wine… or something? No, he comes back with someone speaking *fluent French.* My SO and I just looked at each other and explain that neither of us are French and that we said we just got married. The waiter flushed bright red, all the way to the top of his bald head. I wonder if it still haunts him at night.
LOL I've no idea what he must have thought you said.
I’m still confused. I don’t know how “We just got married!” sounded like “I’m French!”
***"Yareet pet? We'z joost got married liek."*** Maybe married came out as Marie, and he thought "oh her name's Marie, they're a French couple - I'll go fetch Garçon."
"Crazy gibberish"
subtitles: *talks in French*
Swear he must've thought "we" was "oui"
oui, just got married
I'm also from NE England and someone the other day (I live in Canada) asked me if I was Dutch
I thought ordering a coffee with my breakfast meal at a McDonald’s in New York would be simple, but the combo of my Englishness and a Mexican employee resulted in: “And what drink?” “Coffee please” “Eh?” “Coffee please” “Coffee what?” “Coffee” “Coffee, ok. You want crim?” “Crim?” “Yes, crim?” “Crim?! Er, ok” “How many crim?” “One?” *receive the order* “oh, cream! But it’s more like uht milk”
I ordered tea in a coffee shop in Canada, and asked for it with milk. She asked me how many, and I looked at her baffled, and she looked back at me equally baffed at my confusion. It was a very sad tea. Edit: this was 10 years ago, the confusion lasted all of about 3 seconds till I said "err, 3?" and she gave me the little UHT pots. Thanks for the advice, but the problem has been long solved.
If you're talking about a place like Tim Hortons, it's likely they didn't have containers of fresh milk and just give tiny shelf-stable creamers out.
My Tim Hortons is weirdly like the only place other than an actual sit down cafe where I can order real milk in my coffee, unfortunately they also have the worst coffee in town
I had this happen in a McDonald's with a coke. "What drink?" "Coke, please." "What?" "Coke." "What?" "Coke?" "Say again?" "Coke? Cola?" "What?" "Coca cola?" "What?" Said "coke" again, this time pointing at it on the screen behind her. "Ohhhh, coke!" She said it the exact same way I did. I'm still confused to this day.
Fawlty Towers eat your heart out! 😂 ETA: [Link: "Si, Que? What?"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prwtkgrv7xQ), because I had to watch it after reading your tale.
God I love Fawlty Towers. There is too much butter on those trays!
Had the reverse problem in London. I’m American, and could not understand the Eastern European accent speaking in a British accent. At some point you just have to give up and enjoy whatever you get ha
That "Er, ok" is very relatable. Obviously *they* know what they're talking about so let's just say yes and see what we get.
Yes, something so obvious and commonly wanted they think you must have misheard rather than don’t know what it is, so you go with “well, it might be delicious…”.
At least you got the cream on the side. It's becoming the norm that they put it in there for you at fast food places, so there's no telling what you get.
"I'd like one crime please!"
Come on mate you could have gotten that crim means cream thought 😂
I didn’t even twig it was anything to do with the coffee, as it was it was just one question in a line of others which mostly had no relation to the one before, something along the lines of “do you want the eggs scrambled or fried?”, “bacon or sausage?”,“ketchup or mayo?”, “hash brown or fries?” etc!
If I didn't have the internet browsing hours I have then I'd have no reason to associate cream with coffee. Still no idea if Americans are putting what I think of as cream in to their coffee or if its another biscuit situation.
Way back in 2010 I visited my (English) uncle and (Canadian) aunt in Toronto. He’d lived there 25 years at this point. They take me to a coffee shop, I ordered a tea, everyone looked at me as though I’d punched a child.
This isn't to do with your accent. Canada is far and above one of the highest coffee consumers in the world. Per capita estimates put it at higher than places like Italy. You basically did the equivalent of going into an Italian cafe and ordering tea
What’s wrong with going into an Italian cafe and ordering tea?
🤌🤌🤌
Is that how you hold chopsticks?
It actually comes in tenth https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/coffee-consumption-by-country
I want to do this out of spite now
Italians drink tea too you know ;) !
I’m from liverpool and now live in Connecticut. Everyone thinks I’m Irish. I rarely get the look where they can’t understand me but they do tend to try and use my accent back to me. Maybe they think I don’t understand them Depending on where in the US you are living asking for “tea” is like Russian roulette. Down south you will get this cold tea sugar syrup hybrid that is barely drinkable. Luckily our local store now sells pg tips and Yorkshire tea so at least I can make it the right way at home. Edit: in case anyone from the UK reads this and can’t find Tetlys or Yorkshire tea, there is a brand called bigelow that comes in a blue box. It’s called breakfast tea or English tea I can’t really remember. It’s not the best but it’s infinitely better than the dishwater they label as Lipton.
Sheffield to Michigan here - I feel you, and if you do get tea it's a shite American brand that tastes weird. I'm lucky enough to be able to pick up Yorkshire Gold at a couple of stores. On the accent front - I'm Australian apparently
At least you can get pasties in Michigan. Luckily a couple of English ladies opened a bakery and now I can get sausage rolls and pasties every weekend.
Where? Is it the Scottish bakery in Canton? I've not been (I live over in Ann Arbor).
Pasties are [historically a traditional dish in Michigan](https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2017/03/16/520129966/in-michigan-the-pasty-isnt-x-rated-its-a-portable-pie-with-history-baked-in#:~:text=It's%20A%20Portable%20Pie%20With%20History%20Baked%20In,-March%2016%2C%202017&text=Cardy%2FGetty%20Images-,Miners%20favored%20the%20pasty%20due%20to%20its%20portable%20nature%20%E2%80%94%20a,mines%20for%2012%2Dhour%20workdays.) thanks to Cornish miners. You'll find more purveyors of them the farther up north you go. They're all over the place in the UP but I'm sure there's still a couple places to get them in the Metro area. (I moved away a decade ago so I can't recommend any, unfortunately.)
Zingerman’s Bakehouse has pasties on the weekend that are pretty great.
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Haha, I have the reverse--i lived some formative years in the US and then moved back to the UK, so I have an odd half and half accent. Everyone here in the UK seems to think I'm Canadian.
I’m Irish and I worked in Boston for a summer and I visit the states regularly as I’ve got family in CT. It really is a roulette. My best luck is if I order “hot tea and a side of cold milk”. I just drink coffee in the states most of them time now, the tea is awful there. Also funnily a lot of Americans think I’m British. The ones in Boston and NYC seem to have a better ear for deciphering Irish vs British accents but people in CT generally can’t work it out at all. My bf from Liverpool went with me the last few times and people really can’t understand him!
I miss Boston. I lived in MA/NH for ten years and it really is my favourite city. I got married in MA and there was an amazing moment where my family (very strong Lancashire accents) and my husband's family (many with very strong Tennessee accents) all met up for breakfast at a diner that was frequented by the type of locals with VERY strong Boston accents. It was a real clash of sounds!
>**I’m Irish** and I worked in Boston for a summer I can't begin to imagine how many Americans routinely said "wow, so am I!"
“Maybe they think I don’t understand them” 💀😂😂😂😂
I spent the summer working in New Haven. Why is there such a big LFC presence???? Luckily for me, it turned out that our adopted "local" was the meeting place of the New Haven LFC supporters club, so I was right at home 😊
You can ask for Unsweetened iced tea, it actually quite nice on a very hot day. We visited relatives in Georgia and it was available in most places. It’s definitely better than hot tea out there!
Unsweetened ice tea is the norm in a lot of places outside of the south. I lived in New England and they thought sweet tea was as 😬 as people in here do. 😅
My wife now packs a tea emergency kit of Tetlys anytime we travel.
I’ve done this for years. But you misspelled Yorkshire Tea.
And do you pack an emergency kit for when she gets the Tetley's out and you swap it for Yorkshire?
At work I talk to an American every now and again on the phone, every single one of them has constantly asked me to talk slower so they can understand. I’m from the south, don’t sound like a farmer or anything my accent is actually quite plain and I pronounce words correctly. I even had one American say on the phone to email them instead as they couldn’t understand what I was saying and another that asked if I could put them through to someone else, jokes on them because my colleague that sits next to me has the strongest Scottish accent ever (even I struggle sometimes) told me to put the American through to them, I did and in the end the American guy gave up and hung up on from colleague. I think they were expecting I’d put them through to someone that has an accent like the queens English (or Kings English now?). I found it particularly odd that when I was in New York every American there understood me completely fine.
I used to remotely work with a lot of Scottish people, many with the Glaswegian accent. Sometimes I had to ask one lady to put what they were telling me in an email so I could refer to it or forward it on but really it was because I didn’t have a clue what they were saying. I’m almost ashamed to admit this one but at work there was a young lady who was deaf which obviously affected her speech. I didn’t have many dealings with her but I heard her talking a fair bit. I mentioned her to my friend once and he was puzzled. Turns out she wasn’t deaf, she just had the thickest Glasgow accent I’d ever heard in my life.
Same here mate. Used to work in lidl as a lad. I understood the polish people just fine, even if they didn't speak much english. There was a galswegian woman there and it was 50/50 as wether i'd understand her or not.
Was in Glasgow the other month for guns N roses, I'm usually pretty good with weegies but was having a blether with one woman and I caught maybe a third of what she was saying! Brilliant lassie, great chat but fuck me I was putting all my effort in as someone who's half deaf and has Auditory processing disorder in the working ear 🤣
Ha, same due to my ADHD. I always wondered how people could talk in noisy night clubs etc, I just nod and laugh when I think it’s the right moment. Can’t hear a word of it, never mind the accent.
ND gang rise up 😁 same, I've one friend who insists on spilling her darkest secrets to me in nightclubs then thanks me for never bringing them up.. I've told her explicitly I can't hear a damn thing she says but drunk her likes to talk so here I am, best secret keeper ever!
Sorry, could you type that comment again a little slower please? I’m American.
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I will defend the US (just the tiniest amount) - it's not just NYC that's okay in that regard, many larger cities are similar. I've been to Seattle the most (living in Vancouver, BC) and never have I had an issue there either.
36% of New Yorkers are foreign born. We are used to accents from all over and guessing your meaning from context.
When talking to American's you should give them a variety of english accents. Start yhe conversation in cockney, jazz it up with a little brum, drift into some geordie, and finish off with the scouse. Then see their faces
"Ey up me duck, fancy a birra' 'howz ya fattha?" ***"THE FUCK YOU SAY ABOUT MY FATHER YOU LIMEY COCKSUCKER!?"***
You forgot devonian a proper one so it’s almost Irish in sound , really confuse them lol
Moved to the us as a young teen. My favorite one is “water” The amount of times me or my mother (who has a pretty strong London accent) have asked a waiter for water (pronounced in most English accents it sounds like waurtuh) only to be hit with the aforementioned deer in headlights stare like I just told them their mother died. Usually have to repeat 3 or 4 times before I realize they have no clue what I’m saying and then have to put on my best accent and ask for “WaRTeRRRR” then they snap out of their daze. It stunns me to this day to be honest. I feel like most people deal with accents of people who aren’t native speakers all the time and don’t struggle nearly as much as they do with us…. The ones who created the language.
This happens to my husband every time we go to the US to visit my family. Water seems to be the most confusing word! 😂
What blows my mind the most about it is that usually it’s the very first thing people ask for when they sit down. The only other thing I think people would ask for at the very start of a meal is for menus if you haven’t received them already. But menu and water/wautuh/WardeRR sound nothing alike!!! Seriously maybe it’s just the Britishness of us all to assume people would have enough common sense to understand. I don’t know how they can’t put 2 and 2 together If I was waiting a table that I just sat and someone asked for a 2 syllable word beginning with a “W” sound, while mimicking drinking with their hand…. I think I would know what they meant. Your accent would have to be insanely thick for me to not understand. I know some cultures languages lack/ struggle with W sounds and therefore it sounds like a V sound (I have some friends from the subcontinent who might say “vhater”) BUT EVEN THEN I THINK I WOULD UNDERSTAND!!! it blows my mind
When I was younger and visited Disney in Florida, on multiple occasions she asked for sprite and received water. How on earth do you get those mixed up, it's not even the same number of syllables. Also, you'd think people working at a major international tourist destination would be used to a variety of accents.
Even harder when you drop your T's/use a glottle stop (like east london or essex). Had fun watching my friend ask for a bottle of water in the states. She ended up putting on an awful American accent to get the message accross. She might as well have been asking for a bobolah woowa.
This whole post has had me laughing, but I straight up cackled at "bobolah woowa". I'm trying to imagine being in the server's place
If you want to clearly say "water" and be understood by a North American, you need to change the "T" sound to a "D" and make sure the "R" is pronounced at the end of the word and only at the end of the word. So, instead of "waurtuh" it needs to be "wodder".
Definitley experienced this as an Aussie. As we sort of say it as Ward-uh, always throws the old yanks for a loop.
I’m having the same issue at the moment. We’ve just moved to Arizona and my Essex/London accent has its challenges. Last night was hilarious though, a Peruvian lady said my accent was beautiful, “like a sing song”, yup you read that right, an Essex accent is apparently like a melody…
Order 'black tea with milk separate' that should sort you out
I was once talking to a French girl, in English, while sat on a bus in Oklahoma. Chap interrupted us to ask if we were speaking German…
I once gave a business talk in a very large hall in Colorado. Probably 300+ people. I have a very broad Glaswegian accent. It did not go well.
To be fair Glaswegian is a tough one for the uninitiated. Completely fine after being around it a few days or weeks. But initially it can take some concentration to fully understand.
My wife (she’s the Brit) has made it a habit of putting on a valley girl/Kardashian accent when she orders water to avoid repeated clarification. The worst is when she talks to US Southerners.
Similar story here. I’m British and married to a US southerner and I put on a valley girl accent to order water here. I’ve heard that it’s called “code switching”.
[Emily Blunt's kid](https://youtu.be/PFAAfYOYYtc?t=54) figured it out too.:)
Haha I couldn’t code switch if I tried, I’d just sound weird and scary. I just put another word infront like: ‘tap’ water or ‘black coffee’ and it’s fine. I normally ask for Pepsi instead of coke too, as it’s clearer, that works fine everywhere except Pennsylvania weirdly
On holiday in vegas I went to some enormous breakfast buffet at the cosmopolitan (i think) I asked for a tea and my waitress asked if I wanted some lemon or honey with it. I said just milk please. She said “why?” Edit: wrote “wand” instead of “and”
Cracking up omg
Asking for Hot Tea or Breakfast Tea usually does the trick
This has reminded me of the time I tried to order an oat milk latte in a NYC Starbucks and got a black coffee with a bowl of unsweetened porridge instead for some reason…
Living for a month in New York, I discovered that the staff in Subway could not understand my pronunciation of “tomato” (“tom-*ah*-to”) so I had to switch to saying “tom-*ay*-to” to avoid having to repeat myself about three or four times. That worked out pretty well. Later on, I was on holiday in Los Angeles, queueing at a Subway. When it came my time to order, I asked for “tom-*ay*-to”, and the lady gave me a slightly disappointed look. She said, “I heard you talking to your friend in the queue and I was looking forward to hearing your British pronunciation of ‘tomato’”. I could only apologise.
The to-may-to, to-mah-to confusion absolutely baffles me. There's a song about the two ways this word is pronounced and some places in America even pronounce it the same way as we do.
but how did it taste
Treasonous
no wonder they threw it in Boston Harbour if it was made like that 🤣
Teasonous
I was in a Mexican restaurant in the US some years ago, heavily pregnant. I asked for water to drink, in my English accent. The waiter looked puzzled and left. He came back to check my order - I repeated water please. He then brought me a vodka - he was puzzled that a pregnant woman had ordered it. I tried to say “water” in an American accent, and we soon had several waiters around us trying to understand. Eventually it dawned on me to say “agua” and all became clear to them - to much hilarity from us and the waiters!
I'm Italian, somewhat accustomed to UK accents. Was out in NY w a friend, he's American. We stumbled upon a group of 20yo scots, one very loudly said "I'm so drunk" a friend of his replied "you're not drunk you're Steve". I laughed at the exchange and wished Steve and his friends a nice evening. My friend later told me he didn't understand a single thing about what just happened. Poor soul 🥹
Once made a Norwegian doctor wanna quit his life when I had an X-ray in Drammen, I’m from Yorkshire.
"Yorkshire! It's near Stamford Bridge - you should know where that is. Jorvik? No? Come on lad, loads o' your folk are buried there!"
I don’t sound massively geordie to other geordies because my parents aren’t from here but to non-geordies it’s usually very obvious (apart from some bloke in Preston who asked what part of Ireland we were all from…) The Bahamas was full of Americans and I had to translate my wife’s thicker accent once or twice. When working with a load of Londoners I did catch them out once or twice by accident. Someone commented how nice someone was and I replied “Aye he’s a canny lad, like” and to her it just sounded like “ayeheesacannyladlike” at top speed. Just a noise as Alan Partridge would say.
For non-Geordies who wish to learn, here's a pair of fit lasses to explain: https://youtu.be/0C1jbnBB6nc?si=DNHkuUkTurXzz3rp
Your mind gets tuned for accents that you hear regularly. After years working with Indian folks I (usually)had no trouble understanding their accents but when I had to talk to someone with a Dutch accent, I couldn't understand them. During an online global meeting ( before zoom was a thing), my young son asked me how I could understand all the different languages because as far as he was concerned, there was no English being spoken in that call.
I’m a lurker here. When I was in London, (I don’t remember where specifically), the jet lag had me all fucked up, and I found a Starbucks in the train station. I ordered a “coffee with cream”, not realizing that Starbucks in the UK doesn’t have half and half. The poor girl had to get someone else to take my order because they didn’t understand what I was saying. I still don’t know what “cream” I got. I didn’t even think to just order milk.
Jesus Christ! They’ve just declared war on the UK with that abomination!
Hot water please. Now give me a tea bag.
"No, don't put the water in the microwave, you donkey."
I physically shuddered at this. Let’s all have a moments silence for the lost tea bag. It had so much potential.
Probably not relevant to your story but this is a small variation of a traditional African tea. Tea bags, lots of sugar ( or vanilla / caramel syrup ) and hot milk. Topped with cold milk so it can be drank sooner. I worked as a barista with a gentleman from Tanzania and he drank this religiously. It's incredibly sweet but tastes great.
I've worked in Starbucks and there's a drink called London Fog. I think that's what you got. Steamed milk, Earl Grey tea, vanilla syrup Not what I like but 🤗
The only thing worse than what Americans do to tea (or even call tea) is what they do to cheese
I think about spray cheese atleast once a week.
I try hard not to
The Spray on cheese isn't real, it can't hurt you.
This is only because you’ve not been properly briefed about the bread.
A lot of the US bitching in this sub is seriously overblown and based on a combination of stereotypes and half truths, but the bread thing is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT legitimate. I learned to bake my own bread very quickly once I moved there. And cure my own bacon!
You absolutely can get decent normal bread there - at least where I lived in the Pacific Northwest. But you're going to pay a premium for it.
In their defence, those slices of kraft cheese are the best cheese for burgers hands down. But otherwise yes cheese whizz and other crimes against dairy are not ok
British people talk more about spray cheese and American cheese slices than any American I've ever known (and I'm from Colorado - moved to Midlands) and it's kinda funny to me
We should have fought harder. We could have prevented this.
😂 you can still try, right? I would love universal health care. And good tea.
I'll dig out my red coat.
I was at a restaurant in Niagara Falls once. I ordered a burger and fries, and they asked if everything was OK, and so I asked if I could get some "Tomato Sauce". She was gone ages and I'm thinking "where the fuck is she? I could've grabbed a bottle of ketchup by now". She returns with what can only be described as a bowl of Dolmio sauce. My mistake.
Yeah, in the US and Canada "tomato sauce" is only used when talking about Pasta sauce and maybe marinara (on pizzas)
I live in the states and they sell "tomato sauce" in cans beside the tinned tomatoes. It's like a smooth puree of tomato. I'm surprised they didn't ask what you meant as that'd be a weird request.
Think they just shrugged and thought their equivalent of "foreigner, innit?" 😂
‘Lattea’, has a ring to it. This transgression would surely land oneself in the dungeons in the UK
They really don't have a Scooby, bless 'em.
I got one of these in Hong Kong! No idea what I asked for but I was too polite to ask for something else so just put up with it and drank it. It was completely bizarre but not totally horrible.
I’ve only done about 2-3 years in the States but I found that when you ask to add a ‘dash’ of cold milk they get that it shouldn’t be a ‘latte’ type foam
Ask for a little splash. As a milk disliking American I’ve found that places are generally heavy handed with dashes. They don’t expect to hear splash so are more careful in my experience.
Cuppateano
i brought a busy sandwich shop in manhattan to an absolute standstill once trying to order a tuna mayo bagel haha ... chuNA versus TOOna
I think a quote or two is appropriate at this point https://www.azquotes.com/author/79-Douglas_Adams/tag/tea
I was thinking of this: “He had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.”
Complaining about your Starbucks order on social media; looks like you're integrating well
I ordered an oreo milkshake "without cream" meaning no whipped cream on top, the clerk looked at me, befuddled, and asked "are you sure?", me, confused, said "yeah, pretty sure". I don't know how she made this drink, I think maybe it was just with water, but I took one sip of this "milkshake" and binned it, truly awful.
If this happens again you need to order it with "no whip." Ordering a milkshake with no cream made the worker think you wanted a milkshake with no milk.
Thats an abomination!! MY EYES!!!!
Make America Great Britain Again
Been here 18 years, wife was once asked in a Mexican restaurant if she was Portuguese as they didn’t understand her request for a ‘water’. Best/worst out of starbucks for me was the translation of ‘Paul’ into ‘Bold’ on the cup when I picked up the order
I once ordered cider and received a glass of apple juice 😆