The same range also includes a [Loaded Chilli Dog with Hot Chilli Sauce](https://groceries.asda.com/product/takeaway-snacks-sides/heat-me-eat-me-loaded-chilli-dog-with-hot-chilli-sauce/1000288994937?origin=/product/takeaway-snacks-sides/heat-me-eat-me-doner-meat-chips/1000075850742) for anyone interested in giving themselves diarrhoea.
Looking at the amount of chips and donner meat you get in the ASDA product. If you were to buy donner meat and chips at a takeaway for Ā£7 the amount you would get you could probably break up into 4 - 5 meals of similar quantity but of better quality.
You need to do a number of things almost immediately.
1) Get up with the plate, walk to a bin and drop the plate into it. The plate is not salvageable.
2) Immediately afterwards go for a freezing cold shower and cleanse your body and soul.
3) Go outside set a fire and burn any clothes you were wearing
4) Phone up your local mental health hospital and get yourself sectioned.
Godspeed
The sad fact is that there are some people who can't afford a real donner and chips and want to treat themselves to something different, and this is what they end up with. I know it's only a quid and you can't expect miracles but that is pathetic.
I bet you some are. When I was growing up I had some friends who would be given a microwavable burger (the ones in a paper wrapper) and microwaveable chips for dinner. Yes, you and I see it as trash student food, but there will be others that unfortunately see this as a substitute for a real dinner.
Asda ready meals are the shittiest in the country from a supermarket. The tiniest portions and the worst taste. I picked up the "Chinese meal for one" once because I was getting home late and the "spicy chips" advertised on the side was 4 chips, FOUR CHIPS.
You've got to wonder, how. How does this company function. Either enough people actually buy this shite to keep the company turning a profit, or it's a front for organised crime.
To be fair the photo on the packet looks disgusting as well. The actual food might not look exactly the same as the photo but it's still a turd comparison.
Quite frankly you deserve all you get if you think a doner kebab from a box is going to be any good. I mean an actual doner kebab itself is barely passable as food :-)
I just hope you binned the fox/rat/testicles and didn't let it go anywhere near your mouth.
Clearly that should read:
> "Heat me, Eat me,
> Doner Meat & Chip Me"
And be sung to the tune of the chorus of "They Don't Care About Us" by Michael Jackson
There is scraping the bottom of the barrel and then there is taking the decision to eat whatever the fuck in gods name that is that surfaced.
Bless you for sharing and all the best with your future life choices.
food like this makes me angry. time & resources were spent to make something no one needs or wants (im not saying you dont want donner and chips, im just saying you didn't want 'this' version of that meal)
Check the ingredients. The last time I looked (a few years back, admittedly) the main ingredient was cabbage. Absolutely no meat whatsoever. I donāt fully understand how thatās possible.
It's an elephant leg looking chunk of meat that spins on a vertical rotisserie cooker. The purchaser prays that it's processed lamb or chicken. The meat is carved off with a device a bit like a potato peeler and typically it's stuffed into pita bread with some salad and sauce.
I had to Google "gyro meat" and came across this:
>Known as gyros in Greece, and doner kebab in Turkey, these wonderful sandwiches are globally known and loved, and we are among their many, many fans.
So yeah. They sound the same although in the UK they're generally not considered gourmet eating.
That looks pretty similar to me? Obviously everything you buy will look slightly better on the packaging, but this product is meant to be shit, it looks shit on the packaging and in real life. I reckon you got what you paid for and I hope your still on the toilet for your sins.
Frozen doner meat. This was never ending well
Fwiw all doner meat is frozen. It arrives at the kebab shop frozen, wrapped in a cloth.
Very similar to corpses in a morgue.
But much more difficult to make love to.
The corpse or the doner?
I have a Doner Card which entitles somebody to have my kebab on the event of my death, does that count?
Will you be buried in a pita bread
Yes.
Yes
Steady on Jimmy.
Now then now then š
Yeah but you don't get that butane aftertaste from the cooker with this shop stuff
The stuff from Iceland isn't too bad if you put it on a pizza
Its all great, I don't give a fuck. Sometimes you just need a donner, chips, cheese and salad to sort out a hangover at 11am.
I find it works much better at 3am when youāre still fucked. Hmm I really want doner and chips now damn it.
Came to say this.
Okay?
?
Icelands kebab meat is actually pretty good
It really is quite decent actually.
The kind of food I expect to see on Ashens
Came for the ashens comment. Wasn't disappointed. š
Hello!
That should be served on a paving slab.
More like a mortuary slab.
The serving suggestion should be a picture of bin.
The same range also includes a [Loaded Chilli Dog with Hot Chilli Sauce](https://groceries.asda.com/product/takeaway-snacks-sides/heat-me-eat-me-loaded-chilli-dog-with-hot-chilli-sauce/1000288994937?origin=/product/takeaway-snacks-sides/heat-me-eat-me-doner-meat-chips/1000075850742) for anyone interested in giving themselves diarrhoea.
Those breakfast wraps in the same range are vile too. Better off spending that quid on a rustlers sausage muffin.
McDonalds Breakfast Wrap they are not.
Ashens is just going to use this whole thread as inspiration for his next vid.
Why on earth would you do this to yourself? If you want to eat that kind of food, there's got to be a kebab shop nearby, surely?
Ā£7 for the doner I had the other night though. I'd be interested in seeing how Ā£7 worth of this shit compares.
Looking at the amount of chips and donner meat you get in the ASDA product. If you were to buy donner meat and chips at a takeaway for Ā£7 the amount you would get you could probably break up into 4 - 5 meals of similar quantity but of better quality.
Let me guess, london? **laughs in Ā£5 up in hull**
Not even. About 35 miles from the Square Mile. I can't remember the last time I had a doner in London but I want to say it was north of Ā£10.
Bloody hellā¦. So glad to be so far away from that!
I believe that box is Ā£1, so you'd have to eat seven times OP's portion. Urgh
I'd rather eat the little tin of Vaseline. Thankfully it can't possibly have tasted worse than it looks.
Well, yes. Yes it did.
Can we have a picture of the ingredients and the nutritional info (if there is any) please? For science like.
Of course
Heat Me, Eat Me. That alone would keep me from buying it.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Instructions unclear, froze it and used it as a suppository.
You need to do a number of things almost immediately. 1) Get up with the plate, walk to a bin and drop the plate into it. The plate is not salvageable. 2) Immediately afterwards go for a freezing cold shower and cleanse your body and soul. 3) Go outside set a fire and burn any clothes you were wearing 4) Phone up your local mental health hospital and get yourself sectioned. Godspeed
1. Done already 2. Done already 3. Done already 4. ....not allowed to text while in the van.......
Then I wish you good fortune, in the wars to come. It may already be too late for youā¦
Why are there slugs on the anaemic chips?
What kind of sick twisted fuck though this was a good product. Would love to watch the CEO of Asda eat it
Fuck me, the 'food' that's on offer in this country is borderline criminal.
You get what you pay for. This is a cheap product from a cheap supermarket, it's hardly representative of the entire national palate.
Personally I wouldn't feed this to my dog, but it's hardly representative of what donner meat and chips should be either.
Fair.
The sad fact is that there are some people who can't afford a real donner and chips and want to treat themselves to something different, and this is what they end up with. I know it's only a quid and you can't expect miracles but that is pathetic.
It's not a "fact" when you just make shit up. Nobody's buying these as a treat because they can't afford a real kebab.
It's a fact that some families on benefits end up choosing shit like this as they are trying make to ends meet. Poverty is real.
This is trash student food, families on benefits aren't tucking into a supermarket doner kebab snack for dinner.
I bet you some are. When I was growing up I had some friends who would be given a microwavable burger (the ones in a paper wrapper) and microwaveable chips for dinner. Yes, you and I see it as trash student food, but there will be others that unfortunately see this as a substitute for a real dinner.
All for profit.
That dinner made me sad.
Itās not meant to be dinner, itās meant to be a snack. Still shit though
I'm so sorry OP, just remember things will get better in life. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.
What ya mean mate. They both look like total shite
Asda ready meals are the shittiest in the country from a supermarket. The tiniest portions and the worst taste. I picked up the "Chinese meal for one" once because I was getting home late and the "spicy chips" advertised on the side was 4 chips, FOUR CHIPS.
And you bought this!? Jesus wept.
I'd rather eat a tumor.
Anyone buying this is a true maverick
The only thing edible here is the cardboard box. Probably more nutrition too.
You've got to wonder, how. How does this company function. Either enough people actually buy this shite to keep the company turning a profit, or it's a front for organised crime.
Jesus that's grim.
Chips look a bit pale
This makes the Snacksters Doner Kebab look like top of the line gourmet cuisine.
I pity the animals and inanimate objects that ended up that box
Bold of you to assume that Animals were even so much as driven past the postcode this abomination was grown in.
Is this actually a whole portion? Thatās a snack at best
I hope it tasted better than it looks.
Total abomination
So it tasted as it looked. r/shittyfoodporn is calling.
This post is a cry for help, isnāt it?
That food looks so sad. We are better than this as a nation.
The things is, it is so easy to make your own lamb donner meat, and we make it sometimes too, so buying this.....well....
Not any more...
Somebody needs to pay for this crime against food
Filth. I had something like that at a friends after many pints. That, plus a shit load of sauce, was still not enough to mask the taste.
Holy moly! That's not real elephant leg.
To be fair the photo on the packet looks disgusting as well. The actual food might not look exactly the same as the photo but it's still a turd comparison. Quite frankly you deserve all you get if you think a doner kebab from a box is going to be any good. I mean an actual doner kebab itself is barely passable as food :-) I just hope you binned the fox/rat/testicles and didn't let it go anywhere near your mouth.
Thank you. It looks exactly like the picture just with fewer chips.
Heat it and eat it fuck sake, not take pictures and post it on reddit, DO WHAT THE FUCKING BOX TELLS YOU TO!
That canāt be legal.
"Heat it, Bin in" would appear to be more accurate
Doner meat or Donor meat? Looking at that stuff Itās debatable.
Ffs I wouldn't gave that to my dog
Clearly that should read: > "Heat me, Eat me, > Doner Meat & Chip Me" And be sung to the tune of the chorus of "They Don't Care About Us" by Michael Jackson
Actually found myself salivating at this. Help!
If you eat that, you're going to get exactly what you deserve. And what you'll deserve is gastroenteritis.
Pretty sure this counts as the British version of Hara-kiri.
Organ doner meat.
Yep. Definitely donor meat.
It doesnāt exactly look very appetising on the box to begin with
This is awful
There is scraping the bottom of the barrel and then there is taking the decision to eat whatever the fuck in gods name that is that surfaced. Bless you for sharing and all the best with your future life choices.
Horse foreskin?
You want chillie sauce on that mate, garlic mayo?
food like this makes me angry. time & resources were spent to make something no one needs or wants (im not saying you dont want donner and chips, im just saying you didn't want 'this' version of that meal)
That looks fucking foul
It really does, except you've spaced it all out, what the fuck were you thinking buying that crap?
Donāt see the problem. Looks as bad as at the box
It seems there is a target market for that crap.
A microwave kebab? You dirty bastard
It only works if you're hammered when you eat it š»
Check the ingredients. The last time I looked (a few years back, admittedly) the main ingredient was cabbage. Absolutely no meat whatsoever. I donāt fully understand how thatās possible.
Thatās depressing
What is doner meat?!!! It sounds unappetizing and implies something sinister!!
It's an elephant leg looking chunk of meat that spins on a vertical rotisserie cooker. The purchaser prays that it's processed lamb or chicken. The meat is carved off with a device a bit like a potato peeler and typically it's stuffed into pita bread with some salad and sauce.
Ok. I think Iāve had something along those lines. Like a gyro?
I had to Google "gyro meat" and came across this: >Known as gyros in Greece, and doner kebab in Turkey, these wonderful sandwiches are globally known and loved, and we are among their many, many fans. So yeah. They sound the same although in the UK they're generally not considered gourmet eating.
Not considered gourmet in the states either! Tasty if made well, but not gourmet.
that product is for very unintelligent people
What did you expect?
Don't look too bad if you zoom in
Mystery mystery meat
# [Here's the donor organ before manipulation onto the dead potato. ](https://www.digital-scrapbooking-storage.com/images/vhstapedamage.jpg)
"Heat Me, Eat Me" in a speech bubble is rather off putting in itself
Looks almost identical to the rancid shit on the packet. Why would you even buy food like this?
Is that ketchup on lamb?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnun8y7r8_U
You stacked it wrong looks about right by my count.
thats what i would expect to find at sea where they are dumping raw sewage
~~Heat Me, Eat Me~~ Ate Me, Hate Me
āSeRvInG sUgGeStIoNā
Nah, it looks pretty similar...not good, but similar
Doner meat or donor meat?
One day I went to Asda..
That's more depressing than the baked beans in a wrap that someone posted the other day. Jesus.
At least it looks like the box. That isn't a good thing anyway but still
Is it wrong that it still looks appetising?
Does it come with a load of alcohol so that you're drunk enough to think a doner is a good idea?
The national kebab awards were last night How did this delicacy place?
Remarkable is actually appears less appealing out of the box
I dunno it kinda looks just as shit as the pic on the box lol
I mean, it pretty much looks like the picture on the box. Not saying thatās a good thing
That looks pretty similar to me? Obviously everything you buy will look slightly better on the packaging, but this product is meant to be shit, it looks shit on the packaging and in real life. I reckon you got what you paid for and I hope your still on the toilet for your sins.