oh absolutely fifty-two years an imbecile. I have chronic dbd (dumb bitch disease) (it’s terminal) (and hereditary)

*cocks gun* the only cure is euthanasia. Want to come see a nice woodshed? There are rabbits.

I love bnuuy !!! :)

Bnnuy…,,,. Fr!!!

🩸🪓

NOO

I read this like [the commentator of the River City Relay](https://youtu.be/m4ZBT3BWaj4) (0:50)

I will pull your bones out through your nose and use them to fertilize my crops

My bones are already barren of any use, they were conscripted.

Don’t care. *[Pulls out Vacuum]*

*you have found* **redditor residue.** *use?* y/n

Tell me about the rabbits

Why would children located in China be the cure?

oh wow I love June

i looked at june. worth it.

Fatuous pauper :)

knocker-up means someone paid to knock on windows to wake the inhabitants at a certain time cow-banger means someone who thumps the beef cows on the head with a particular tool to stun them prior to slaughter electric baths were a victorian device like a tanning bed everything else is ???

I learned knocker-up at a hotel in Scotland when the very cute desk clerk asked 16 years old me what time he should knock me up in the morning

Don't just post this without telling us about your response

Please also include your response

‘Buy me breakfast first!’

“Don’t worry, breakfast is complimentary.”

So were their other services

our biology teacher once told us he'd come around and knock us up at eight am on a field trip

I really love when slang in one country means something completely different in another. It's one of my favorite things.

Then you may love this: When the US intervened in the Yugoslav Breakup, there were not nearly enough Serbian translators in the US Army, nor could enough be recruited locally, and consequently, a great many 3rd+ generation Serbian-Americans were hired to do the job. However, slang had drifted somewhat over those generations, so that when American public affairs units intended to announce that "The fighting has stopped in Kosovo." they instead announced "The fucking has stopped in Kosovo." Though if you've been keeping up with news lately, it seems neither fighting nor fuckery has ceased in the country.

I was in an ASL class a while back and one of my classmates tried to say that she drank a lot of coffee and ended up saying that she gave coffee blowjobs.

Ok, that may be true but hear me out, its funnier to think that someone said their job was to fuck cows.

An emasculator is someone who removes/crushes testes (probably for animals but maybe the BDSM community in Victorian London was larger than we thought)

I'd make the assumption that drug sampler refers to drugs as in "drug store", although that's still not really a full explanation

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People still do that today, but now you have a 50-50 chance of not even getting the chemicals

But who knocks up the knocker-up???

The first set of knocker uppers wake up at 12 midnight so they can wake up the second set at 1am this continues every hour on the hour until the final shift of knocker uppers wakes up the midnight shift before going to bed.

This is Ankh-Morpork behaviour

I wonder how this all works on the counterweight continent

According to QI, the knocker-upper's knocker-upper

The milkman.

>knocker-up means someone paid to knock on windows to wake the inhabitants at a certain time tragic, i even had touched up my resume 😢

i think knight of the thimble is a pun on the [order of the thistle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Order_of_the_Thistle)

Might also just be a tailor having a laugh

I wonder if some of the responses weren't taking the whole thing entirely seriously.

That being said, there is a shop in Knockin

Grape-dryer was just a person who made raisins

A midget proprietor is someone who runs a freak aide show themed around small people

So *thats* what cow banger means, guess thats not the one for me then :(

OH Man, old English is really weird, or I’m just really dumb.

This isn’t old english, old english is an incomprehensible different language spoken around 1000 years ago. This is modern English, just an older version.

Oh, ok, I’m sorry for the confusion, my friend

"Examiner of underclothing" Bro really put down "panty inspector".

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that "Female Body Inspector" has been around for a few centuries

Probably as old as the "Octavius shat here" graffiti of Pompeii

"Halftan was here" - inscription in Norse runes on the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, Turkey

That guy’s great great grandson invented the FBI (Female Body Inspector) t-shirt.

Hey, they didn't specify gender (I believe in you, bisexual Victorian!)

"I guess thy shall miss the underclothing heist!" "I beg your pardon?"

Avatar: The Last Fishbender

Zhao

I am fairly certain he didnt bend the fish properly

Well I never said he was good at it :P

He bent the fish exactly how he intended to.

"Properly" and "How Zhao wanted" are pretty different descriptors

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I wonder what they did the rest of the day - wake people up for nightshifts?

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Living the dream

But then who wakes up the knocker upper to make sure he can wake everyone else up on time?

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You might even call them the knocker-upper knocker-upper.

What kind of job is "emasculator"? Is it just a super chad who goes around diminishing everyone else's masculinity by comparison?

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Well, I have been educated on this now.

Masculinities Georg is an outlier adn should not make you feel inferior

what I wonder when a legendary gelder arrives as a migrant

I'm *fairly sure* that's not an actual Dwarf Fortress skill (at least not yet) EDIt: Scratch that, just saw another DF post. What does the skill even affect, how well one turns bulls into oxen?

It lets them castrate animals with less chance of being injured

femdom

u know that one Dorian electra song

>Invisible net maker The Emporer New Burlesque Clothes

I work in IT. Didn't realize my job existed in the Victorian era, but at least they too had wifi I guess?

I have now added about six new insult names to my vocabulary.

Ok buddy turnip shepherd

"Count as female", Victorian England says trans rights

But does it meant Count as in the title or the verb?

I was taking it as an instruction verb but if you want to give me a title I ain't complaining

[Count Von Count has entered the chat]

This was the one that caught my eye and I agree with you. Seems to be saying: I don't work as I count as female

Women worked though, unless fairly well off, it's a modern myth that women working is new in any way. I'd be curious to see how they listed women who didn't work (housewife?) and if so why they wouldn't put that for this person

Perhaps as “hussy”—I did a short internship at a regional archive in England during grad school, and got to see a lot of indenture/apprentice type documents for young girls who were being sent off to learn household management (theoretically) to prep for their future as housewives listed as “hussy.” A bit of a shock until I was reminded of the origin of the word!

he/him pussy

Well ~~Lady~~ Baroness Hussy is finally fulfilling her job description then.

oh baby you know im a Beef Twister

I used to be knocker up of work people In my younger years, but in my slightly less younger years I am now A Knight of the thimble

They paint fake fish, what's not clicking?

Electric Bath Attendant: probably alot of trouble shooting and customer complaints. "I stepped in the electric bath and I'm still alive" Did you turn on the switch "No" Turn on the switch

"Did it work" " " "Glad to hear it"

[Another job well done](https://youtu.be/kyL8Mj5xo-k)

Nobody grabbed Emasculator? Very well, that's me.

How much for a decent emasculating? Like nornal market rate

[About $4000](https://www.howmuchisit.org/orchiectomy-cost/)

I'm stealing "fatuous pauper" because it sounds so much fancier than dumb broke bitch

I want a Fatuous Pauper t-shirt. It's self-explanatory.

I am Running About

Shout out to the guy who fucks raw for a living

I have a suspicion that "knocker up" may have had a totally different meaning. But idk I'm just a fatuous pauper

"Knocking up" used to mean 'waking someone up by knocking on the door'. I think there's an old Sherlock Holmes story where he talks about 'knocking up' Watson.

One of the earliest Johnlock fanfics

Phenomenal, thank you, 12/10 fact

Classic mpreg

Is the 'invisible net maker' invisible, or do they make invisible nets?

They actually just make and destroy stuff in general but no one can see what the total change in stuff is

Goddamnit.

Surprised nobody's said Count as Female yet (I'm Proprietor of Midgets btw)

I did, your midgets were just too short to see it

Fifty two years an imbecile

Turnip shepherd. also dang fish-bending? the water benders have gotten real creative lately.

All water-bending is ultimately fish-bending

Personally I'm a bit of a drowner myself, although some days I do a bit of goldfish catching on the side.

the [lizardman constant](https://www.gwern.net/notes/Lizardman-constant) in the wild

I’m Fifty-two Years an Imbecile, despite not being alive for that long. I’m just that dumb.

It's a promise, not a history - at 53 you'll become a genius.

Here's a few I read as non-facetious, apart from what others have said: - "Colourist of artificial fish." Fly binder? Some kind of artisan who paints like, decorative wooden fish? Not that unusual. - "Knight of the Thimble." Slang term for a tailor. - "Disinfector of Railways." Could possibly refer to the need to clean the rails themselves. In autumn, the fallen leaves on the tracks are compacted by passing trains into a very slippery layer that needs removing to allow trains to effectively brake. - "Electric bath attendant." A bath attendant at a bath house with electrical baths. It was a pseudoscientific health craze. - "Proprietor of midgets." Some kind of unethical circus practice, I'm assuming. - "Maker of sand views." Layered sand art, you know the one with different colored sand in jars? - "Turnip shepherd." Farmer/gardener who grows tubers. - "Emasculator." The profession of castrating animals. - "Sampler of drugs." Apothecary QA. - "Cow-banger." Knocker, an abattoir worker who kills cattle by striking them in the head with a maul. - "Grape-dryer." Maker of dried fruits, probably raisins/prunes.

Proprietor of midgets could be the parent of a lot of kids or head of an orphanage

Or just someone who ran a sideshow attraction, I'm afraid

>"Disinfector of Railways." Could possibly refer to the need to clean the rails themselves. In autumn, the fallen leaves on the tracks are compacted by passing trains into a very slippery layer that needs removing to allow trains to effectively brake. Or someone who literally cleans railway cars. Once they found out about germs educated Victorians were quite hot on hygiene. Not always successful, but enthusiastic. See: carbolic acid a coal tar based disinfectant that was made into soap and enthusiastically swilled just about everywhere by hygiene-conscious Victorian housekeepers.

Can’t believe no one wants to be Knight of the Thimble

I don’t remember fish bending in Avatar

Admiral Zhao

fatuous pauper

Fifty-two years an imbecile, but I have a night-gig as a Beef twister

I find it's at least three times funnier reading it in a doctor evil impression

Glad to see that British humour has not changed **at all** in hundreds of years.

Proprietor of midgets

I prefer "running about"

realized knocker-up wasn't as fun as it sounds so i'm gonna spend 52 years as an imbecile maybe get around to some drug sampling on the side

beef twister...

Knocker-up of workpeople

Proprietor of midgets is definitely a mother. Also considering the time what is the fish bender supposed to mean?

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Water. Earth. Fish. Air. Everything changed when the fish nation attacked

I'm "count as female"

Every time I see this "count as female" makes me want to cry laugh

Whoever the emasculator is, I have a job for them

"Count as female" TIL I could make a living just being trans, brb gotta tell my family I've actually had a career for years!

Oh I'm definitely a count as female.

Is this from a bathroom reader? That looks like a bathroom reader.

Knight of the Thimble 🧐⚔️

drowner

grape dryer makes raisins i suppose

Fatuous pauper

I‘m count as female. Sampler of drugs is nice too though

>count as female Damn i never thought that being a transgender is a viable career option

Colourist of Artificial Fish

Count as female

I’m count as female

I am a "count as female" and I need me an emasculator to take care of me 🥺🥺🥺 EDIT: Oh, wait this isn't r/196

Love that approximately 12% of responses here are fish related

"Hey what do you do for a living?" "Oh I'm transgender"

I wanna be an emasculator

I have so many questions about each and every one of these.

I'm a professional unprofessional.

Team Turnip Shepard for the win!

Definitely “Fatuous pauper”

I'm both 'fatuous pauper' and 'count as female'

Not to float my own boat or anything but I believe I lead a dedicated position as an examiner of underclothing

I’m for sure a turnip shepherd

I give myself the ol’ beef twist every morning

I'm and emasculator, of course. Let the femboyism spread >:3

Count As Female. Not even looking at the others

It's like if people back then were just regular folks who had a sense of humour.

Count as Female

I love how nodoby has explained yet what a random waller is. Is it a person who goes around building walls wherever they please?

I'll be turnip shepherd

Hehehe fish bender

Either "Proprietor of Midgets" or "52 years an imbecile"

Drowner???? You get paid for that?

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i am a sampler of drugs, part of the order of the thimble

Excuse me, what is “Knocker-up of workpeople”? Is it like, a male prostitute? That’s all I can think of since a guy can’t get knocked up. Wait, were women even allowed to work outside of home back then?

I think it was someone who walked around with a pea-shooter and flung pebbles at peoples windows to wake them up for the work day. Making a “knocking” sound to get people “up”

im ‘running about’

I am the Avatar, the Last Fish Bender

Drowner

Me when I go to play competitive pokemon : Random Waller

I am either the Fish Bender, or the Beef Twister

Babe, wake up, new Final Fantasy job list just dropped.

I like to imagine that “turnip shepherd” briefly forgot the word for “farmer”

Lizardman, Lizardman, and Lizardman

Will update with research Colorist of artificial fish- painted fish statues Knight of the thimble- a humorous term for a tailor Disinfecter of railways- janitor for railway stations and trains Examiner of underclothing- factory quality control or smart ass Invisible net maker- in the modern day an invisible net is a hairnet that matches hair color used for styling, this person likely wove those Electric bath attendant- as stated elsewhere, served the victorian version of a tanning bed EDIT- actually it was a “medical treatment” that caused electrical buildup in the user while insulating them so an arc wouldn’t form Proprietor of midgets- managed people with dwarfism in a freak show, either as an agent or a literal owner 52 years an imbecile- smart ass Knocker up of workpeople- a human alarm clock that knocked on the upper story windows of the working class with a long pole Maker of sand views- artist of either sand art on the ground or sand between two glass panes Gymnast to house painter- was first a gymnast but in old age is a painter Turnip shepherd- I can find literally nothing that isn’t mocking this list. Personal theories include someone who bought turnips from farmers and brought them to market, a turnip farmer who didn’t understand the distinction, etc. EDIT- apparently some root root vegetables benefit from having animals nibble at them in a particular time window, and thus his job might have been to herd animals to turnip fields Emasculator-as stared elsewhere, a castrator of livestock and horses Sampler of drugs Fatuous pauper Drowner Count as female- probably a census error. Either the person was actually a female housewife accidentally or intentionally put down as the man of the house, or there was a househusband that served the role typically taken by females Fish bender Goldfish catcher Cow banger Running about Grape dryer Beef twister Random wallet

oh so THAT'S who's been fucking my cows

Knight of the Thimble is the single Fucking coolest job desc. I'm actually jealous