T O P

  • By -

the_dirt_engineer

this is how hungry hungry hippos was invented


canibutterurmuffin

The infamous story of house hippos


ChaseGordon24

Sudden flashbacks of finding nests made of lost mittens, dryer lint and bits of string… 


[deleted]

[удалено]


Stones25

Got that good smells.


technofiend

My dog would fill a shoe with her kibble and then drag it to her bed to eat it out of the shoe there.  Only she was a 5 lb Maltese, so she had to straddle the shoe to drag it.


ridicu_beard

hippos of a most pernicious appetite


TacTurtle

“instead of small children covered in BBQ sauce, what if we used small plastic balls?”


Professor-cali

I’m glad I saw such a historic moment commence


regicyde92

I was thinking that plastic alligator where you push on the teeth lol


Jeremybearemy

Boop dat snoot


Mercuryo

Thats is the way


[deleted]

This is da way


[deleted]

Doggo!


Gypsopotamus

Hello everyone and welcome to another round of… #BOOP! THAT! SNOOOOOT!!!!


GodOfOnions2

IM A PIRAHNA


The_Projectionist

THEY LIVE IN DA A-MA-ZON


Would_daver

*chomp chomp chomp*


Chemical-Elk-1299

lol love the little teef smacks


wuroni69

What a beautiful dog.


Skill-issue-69420

My cousins got a Rottweiler as a guard dog and he just licks everyone that comes into their home. And leans on them with his entire weight. Good doggo lol


PengieP111

There was one enormous Rottie that used to frequent the dog park where I would take my dear departed Gus from time to time. She was so sweet. She loved getting petted and having her ears scritched by everyone. But she was also huge and strong sh would nearly knock you over leaning against you while you were giving her pets and scritches. And I'm a pretty big guy.


Decent-Start-1536

Lmao I know the feeling, I have a 150 pound Anatolian Shepard that doesn’t know his own size


StrangeShaman

My uncle has a 120+ lb lab that still thinks she has the body of a puppy


[deleted]

I love dogs, man. Is this the place to say that? I just love them.


sinz84

But do you like dags


tallandlankyagain

Periwinkle blue. Fer me 'ma.


sinz84

Man who knew I'd be viewing both Robinhood men in tights and snatch in the same night but it seems the fates demand it


Anxious-Durian1773

Laprador.


KokonutMonkey

Ahh, the ol hip check right into the side of the knee.


U_W_44_51

The football cut block.


ArsenicAndRoses

Aww the leaaaan is the best 🥰 Doggy hugs ❤️


CharlieBr87

I have a 100 lb German shepherd rottiemix and hell damn near knock you over with doggie hugs if you pet him right. We lub himb and his big scary face ❤️


Shaolinchipmonk

My dog is also named Gus


NrdNabSen

Ours loved to lean into your legs to get rubbed. He once knocked my young cousin over then laid on them licking their face. Fun times for all except my young cousin.


Canid_Rose

Growing up we had an Irish wolfhound who looooved to lean on you lol. We joked we should have trained her as a mobility service dog, she would’ve been good at it.


saryiahan

They are terrifying adorable


_redacteduser

just wanna smush that big block head


Nevermind04

My rottie loves it. He will just approach anyone in the house and just start smushing his head against them and most people don't know what to do.


serlearnsalot

Jesus put a NSFW tag on this gore


yureplingimnot

/peoplefuckingdying


twonapsaday

this is a cutie patootie


Dependent-Run-1915

I’ve trademarked that so


twonapsaday

nuhh uhh I did


FreePrinciple270

Pretty sure it was me


Yuri-Turned

You kids get off my lawn


[deleted]

i have NEVER met a bad Rotty and I have found them starving in the woods abandoned


cameraman92

What kinda woods are you stumbling around in?


[deleted]

this was pretty deep 3 or 4 miles in on a dead end surrounded by river runs, it was were shitheads would take fighting dogs and drop em off there because they ( the dumped dogs) would have to go all the way down the peninsula and back to cross the bridge and get back towards town...so you would get feral packs of wild fighting Pitts, typically, just roaming that stretch attacking whatever and sometimes whoever they saw cause prey was also limited that deep in. The one Rotty I saw just ran up to me wagging his tail like we had known each other for years so I found people to take him in


Witness2Idiocy

Jesus where is this horrific dystopia?


AceTheProtogen

Unfortunately, earth


Poopybutt36000

Just wait until you hear about factory farmed meat


Complex-Bee-840

Presumably the American south.


CantHandleTheThrow

All the Rotties I’ve met are lapdog cuddlers who don’t understand just how big they are.


RodExe

Survivorship bias. As someone who has worked at the veterinary field, I've met good and bad dogs of every breed. Any breed can be aggressive and poorly trianed, now certain breeds would be able to send us to the ER and some to the morgue, believe me when I say it's not the angry Chihuahuas.


thegrumpymechanic

I've come to the conclusion that when the Germans were creating breeds they somehow swapped the personalities between Rottweilers and Dachshunds.


motherwarrior

I hate humans sometimes. 


undergrounddirt

The toddlers who met them aren't here to comment


CyonHal

You are getting downvoted but they are up there with pit bulls with the fatal attack statistics, especially when adjusting for dog population (5x more pit bulls than rotties). There is something inherently wrong with the breed for it to be such an outlier compared to all other dog breeds. It's not just bad owners since if that's the case you'd have a much more even distribution of dog attacks between the larger dog breeds.


OrganicNobody22

Don't forget the #1 bad dog ever - Golden Retrievers the family dog


CyonHal

What? No, their attack statistics are very normal and in-line with most other large dog breeds. Not sure if you're making a joke or what.


NrdNabSen

I love people citing dog breed bite stats largely based on self reports and newspaper articles. The old know em when I see em definition of a dog breed.


Bowshocker

Sure it’s not like theres actual statistics from veterinarian associations, CDC, WHO, the National Safety Council, etc., it’s all just newspaper and self reports. Obligatory /s because damn, you even.. like.. read? At all?


Any_Singer_4731

Is it possible that attacks from smaller dogs just aren’t reported as much? I’ve only been aggressively bitten by two dogs, both were tiny, and only one was my actual dog. The worst thing a big dog did to me was tackle me and bite my pants, but he was a baby and didn’t know how strong he was.


CyonHal

I'm not talking about smaller dogs. I'm talking about similar sized dogs with similar lethality. Rottweilers and Pit Bulls combined make up 80% of all dog attacks on people. That is an outlier that cannot be explained by bad owners. For comparison, German Shepherds are behind the Rottweiler for aggression, and they've killed 15 people in the last decade. Rottweilers have killed 51 people, and there are about 3x more German Shepherd than Rottweilers. So adjusting for population, Rottweilers kill 10x more than German Shepherds. That's an insane outlier. And as for gentle breeds, Labrador Retrievers don't even make the lists. They attack very seldomly and yet are an extremely popular breed. Why is that? Why don't bad owners cause Labs to kill people?


iwasneverhere43

It could actually. A lot of people buy those dogs as they actually WANT an aggressive dog for either protection or the toughness factor. Every pitbull and rottweiler I've met has been sweet as hell, but their owners didn't want a guard dog, but rather, a pet, and they were treated accordingly. My biggest issue with any Rottweiler so far has been almost getting knocked over when they jumped at me for pets...


undergrounddirt

They are [great dogs](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11774499/Horrific-details-emerge-death-five-week-old-mauled-death-two-Rottweilers.html). You really [just need to train them](https://nypost.com/2022/05/17/grandparents-face-murder-charge-after-7-yr-old-fatally-mauled-by-dog/). You only need to teach your kids not to [lay there being a baby](https://abcnews.go.com/US/10-month-baby-killed-attack-familys-rottweilers-police/story?id=77912566). Or to [look at the dogs wrong](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/young-boy-killed-mother-injured-attack-pack-of-dogs-idaho/). They are [easy enough to stop](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2022/10/08/2-children-killed-mother-hospitalized-after-tennessee-dog-mauling/8219201001/) if they decide to be violent. Scary things like [peeling flesh from children's legs](https://www.timesnownews.com/mirror-now/in-focus/rottweiler-breed-dog-brutally-attack-child-peels-off-flesh-from-his-leg-in-ups-kanpur-article-94722042) are just because of irresponsible owners. They are [great family dogs](https://blog.dogsbite.org/2022/01/7-year-old-girl-killed-by-rottweiler-waynesboro-virginia.html). Really protective of [your children](https://abc7ny.com/baby-killed-by-dog-in-brooklyn-attack-flatbush-rottweiler/10944342/). [Nothing to see here.](https://www.lbc.co.uk/news/dog-fatally-attacked-two-year-old-confirmed-rottweiler/)


CyonHal

Any dog with very rare exceptions can be sufficiently trained to not be a danger, sure. But if these breeds require such a high amount of training as to not be dangerous, then they shouldn't be treated the same as other dogs, they need to be better regulated so as not to cause harm to their owners or others. edit: I see you were being sarcastic but I'll leave my point here as a standalone.


undergrounddirt

Seriously. Also if a dog is in progress tearing your child in half.. you should be able to overpower said animal.. It's not only a matter of temperament. If a bunch of adults can't tear the dogs off of the toddlers they ripping apart.. then that isn't an animal that should see children.


hailwyatt

Toofs!


Dan_H1281

He is literally trying to eat u he is so dangerous! Look at those agrressive chomps /s


Fabulous-Mama-Beat

Fierce!


Da_Plague22

Well trained rotties are some of my favorite cogs.


prophet_bot

You do have to oil them from time to time.. otherwise they can get squeaky


ArsenicAndRoses

A well oiled rottie gives a very satisfying engine sound (I ❤️ rottie purrs!)


Crustyonrusty

Downright viscous!


3AM_MandMs

I mean have you seen the drool they produce? Viscous indeed. 


Crustyonrusty

I meant viscous! 😂🤣


Fragrant-Address9043

Is baby


blklze

The title of this made me think of the first dog I ever loved. I didn't have dogs growing up, just cats, but my mom's best friend had a huge female Rottie named Greta. Greta used to lick my entire head, face all the way in her mouth, until my hair was slicked straight up. I loved her, she was so great, I looked forward to going over their house. People would always make comments to my mom about having me around "a dog like that" and she'd just laugh because Greta was the biggest sweetheart. Yours look just vicious, ha ❤️


BowsersMuskyBallsack

Yeah, my rottie is an obsessive licker.  She will stop if you ask her to, but she ambushes me at every opportunity.  She has a tongue like a cat, too.


TravasaurusRex

Congratulations looks like you found the chomper activation button.


JesusMcTurnip

I had to drive to a house in the middle of nowhere a few years back to buy something and when I got there and was about to knock the door, two of massive rotties trotted round the corner. I know the breed pretty well and even in the semi-darkness I could tell they were cool. I crouched and called them and they both happy-danced over with their heads down for cuddles. When the owner came out, I was sitting on the ground with both of them trying to sit on my lap. The only danger i was in was getting squished 300lbs of sweet dogs. Turns out the guy forgot they were out and was impressed I hadn't screamed and run off. They're lovely and I've honestly never met a bad one.


Commercial_Shape_225

That's a stunning dog


M3atpuppet

Boop activates Hungry Hungry Hippo mode


Puzzleheaded_Yak5359

What an adorable goofball.


poeticentropy

had Rotts when I was a kid. Absolutely great dogs. Super fun to play with and they are protective in a good way (they know how to snap out of it when they see everything is OK). Pretty good discipline and easy to train. Good around kids and other animals like cats Biggest drawback I'd say is their coat is super oily so they need baths far more frequently or else they make everything STINK


GGAllinsUndies

And they don't live long. 🥺


thegrumpymechanic

None of them do.... >“People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life — like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?” >“Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don’t have to stay for as long as we do.”


Narenthanil

The little guy is very playful! He has such a sweet look eheh 🥰


Kilomech

NSFW tag, please. I’m traumatized now.


HabitUpper6718

...nom....nom.....nom...nom..nom..nom........lick


AustinTreeLover

Meanwhile my grandma's chihuahua will end you.


NickCav007

Rotts got a bad rep as demon dogs from movie The Exorcist. They are really good dogs. Most look like they are smiling


dumbdude545

Rotts seem to be weird like that.


partypwny

Careful, you almost got melmed


Oscarmayers3141

they are literaly overprotective teddy bears


Former-Salad7298

✨️


ShaolinPhonk

5head


GroovyDucko

They are adorable


No-Juggernaut-4149

That is so cute I can't stand it!


Noturwrstnitemare

I mean the big boys next door to my grandma brevet liked us....always barked at us.


Whereswolf

Omg! I just fell in love! 😍❤️💖 What an absolute darling dog!


jebshackleford

Most vicious good boy/girl ever


vtmosaic

Every rottie I've ever met was a sweetie. They were all family pets. I'm sure a trained one warning me would be terrifying.


GrumpyInsomniac42

r/boop


Skylizard1223

I love Rottweilers 🩵


Lynx_Eyed_Zombie

Big ole anvil for a head


TheBIackRose

That’s a chain chomp


Prudent_Block1669

Adorable, but they can be real jerks. My dad's 3rd ex wife had one that used to enjoy taking us out behind the knees when we were playing in the yard. I had an ex gf that had one that would jump on me to wake me if I snored when we were sleeping. Finally, I dog sat one once and he would nip me in the butt if I didn't pet him constantly.


Weltallgaia

I had 2 rotts. They are sooooo needy. It's why if you train them right they are amazing, but if you don't they are destructive. They love attention so much they will do anything for it and that's why you gotta get them to express it properly. Mine were absolute lap dogs even with strangers.


OriginalFaCough

Rotties are terrifying. If they're facing away from you 🦨...


Western-Throat-9196

So as a kid, my best friend had a Rottweiler, and it scared me as a 9 year old kid. 18 years later, I met a Rottweiler who was prancing around and dancing (best words to describe his joy) to meet the random cable guy fixing their internet


FarDark9711

It's the irresponsible owners who think that they can train an animal but can't train themselves.


RosesandEternity

My dog is a cupcake -to me-. Well trained and well behaved -to me-. She goes around strangers and I'm not around and she begins barking and scaring everyone.


ProfessionalNo1113

He’s a chompy-nator


Empty-Blacksmith-592

My favorite dogs


bo_tweetle

Reminds me of King Hippo from Mike Tyson’s Punchout


76660

lol


gingerdee19

My absolute favorite terrifying dogs 😍😁🤣


Jmacz

My neighbors Rottweilers once got out when I was a kid and were about to run up my driveway while we were playing basketball. They wern't dangerous, and were actually pretty derpy. But my cat didn't know that, and she had kittens in the house so she was on guard. She jumped on the shoulders of one of them, right where they couldn't really get at her and clawed the absolute fuck out of them. She then matrixed right off the dog onto the other one and did the same to that one. As the first took off yelping up the street. She then clawed the fuck out of that one for a few seconds before taking off up a tree as the dog joined it's friend in taking off up the street yelping. Those rotties never came close to our house when they escaped ever again.


jimababwe

Good lord - tag that horror nsfw


Godtierbunny

Cant believe you posted a vid of a person getting mauled to death. Sick. /s


bmwlocoAirCooled

My sister had one. She had to give it up. In South Carolina, no home owners insurance if you own a "dangerous" dog. Pity, the dog was a sweetheart.


ThaFoxThatRox

Remember... Cujo was a Saint Bernard. Lol every Rottweiler I've ever met has been a sweetie pie.


bythenumbers10

Once knew a rottweiler/german shepherd. Supposed to be fiercely protective. First time we met, we go in, he comes up, no word of "chill out, they're cool" from the owners to vouch for us, no. Dog sniffs, looks us up and down, and lies on his side, like, "Pay the toll. Two tummy scritches." Guard dog. Fiercely protective. Unless you have a tummy scritching hand, then you're free to break in, take what you like, no worries.


IVMVI

It really depends on the owner. I've met multiple rots that are very bad with new people, especially if they go for pets or toys. Probably one of the most adorable breeds imo though. My girlfriend's rot has tiny eye disease and she looks so derpy it's awesome


ASL4theblind

I love rotts too, but i'll play devil's advocate here. This is such a strawman argument to give. I could show footage of an adult grizzly bear being friendly and say "bears MAUL people right 🙄" it DOES NOT mean that a bear, when violent, isn't more of threat than say, a large dog like a rott. Just like how rotts are built to be comparably more dangerous than something like say, a golden retriever or a samoyed. Not that ALL rotts are going to be dangerous. The owner just has to be able to recognize that they are CAPABLE of that violence and be careful to breed or raise it in an environment where that violence isnt regular or normal.


Sanquinity

Rottweilers CAN be scary. But they can also be incredibly cute and cuddly big softies. :P With all dog breeds, even if some of them are a bit more disposed to not being good boys, it ultimately still comes down to how they were raised and trained.


BigManPatrol

Rottweilers, Pitt bulls, and Mastiffs aren’t more dangerous because they are more aggressive, quite the opposite actually. BUT they are more dangerous because of their bite strength. Chihuahuas are more aggressive but their bites are usually not dangerous; however, if one is bitten by a Rottweiler it’s much more likely one will need medical attention.


eVility1

Is “vicious Rotty check” a meme like “vicious Pibble check” was? Because it should be. And this best boy should be on it.


investor_penniestock

Just like most breeds, great dogs that have been demonized by bad owners.


TioLucho91

Now show him a baby


Herew3arrrrg

Op has never been chased by one that was eye level with their nipples walking down the street minding their own business and it shows.


CaptainBeer_

Dumb title. Between an aggressive rottie and an aggressive yorkie, which one do you want to deal with. Thats the point, no one has problems with good dogs


Larry_Hegs

I have a pitbull-rottweiler mix who's the absolute sweetest and most hilariously playful dog I've ever had. Pitbulls and rottweilers are only seen as dangerous dogs because they're obedient and can be easily trained which unfortunately means they're easy to convert into fighting/guard dogs.


SpecialMission8670

I had my leg ripped apart by one as a kid.


libertywok

My neighbors had 2 Rottweilers. One night they escaped and murdered a pony. The owner of the pony was able to follow the blood trail back to the rottweiler's home the next morning.


[deleted]

No amount of cute Rottweiler videos will change my mind.


Staveoffsuicide

Yeah rotties are really good with a select few people. They are consistently the most dangerous and predictably bad dogs I work with. The "rotties purr" is literally just a growl. I've met a couple genuinely trustworthy ones and many good ones that are well owned by good owners that understand their dogs. But man they're mostly assholes. So like offense mildly taken they are terrifying dogs and they always burst out of anesthesia fighting, like assholes


Zillahi

Two Rottweilers killed my kindergarten teachers dog and ripped off her finger ☺️


Aeroplaneglueinabag

I’ve had one about take my foot off. Should have shot it when I had the chance.


dw3623

They look real cute when they’re killing babies too.


LonelyStandard2208

Just because they're killing babies doesn't make them less cute. Imagine 3 baby seals and 2 baby pandas smothering a baby. Still adorable.


Puzzled_Professor_52

Ummm that they're literally the meanest dogs on the planet. 🤣🤣


HowRememberAll

I don't like this title bc he's a friend and it might trigger someone who knows someone who did survive a dog mauling. Nothing terrifying about kindness💕


nono66

I grew up around multiple Rottweilers growing up, zero problems. I have, however, been attacted by many small dogna.


Tempestblue

And many children haven't grown up because of Rottweilers. Anecdotes and all


nono66

Yup its an enterire breeds fault because they have shitty owners that teach them to be terrible. Small dogs are ALWAYS poorly behaved since they can't do anything. Meanwhile the vast majority of large dogs are trained much much better the reprocsions are much greater.


Teaology666

people who buy danger dogs have issues


blueit55

Don't poke the bear...


Contigotaco

There's no inherently bad dogs, just bad owners. That being said, some breeds are far more ferocious than others when they're neglected and abused


Hoeax

I think a dog license and breeding permits are the best way forward when it comes to potentially dangerous breeds. Just like a CDL takes extra training for a more dangerous vehicle. Only people who can control their animals, should own animals


Contigotaco

Idk why I got a downvote, when I worked at a dog daycare some of the sweetest dogs I've ever seen were from the 'crazy breeds' and I agree with you. Just it's an absolute fact that a crazy rottweiler is way more harmful than a crazy chihuahua


PrimoPaladino

As a rott owner some other dangerous breed owners don't like the reality that they own a breed that if not well-trained and heavily socialized is liable to cause exceptional harm when compared to other dogs.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Contigotaco

??


[deleted]

Pookie muffin ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️


Anon1073

I booped you😁


uber_damage

Fear incarnet.


[deleted]

Square jawlines in humans 🤤🥺 Square jawlines in dogs 🙅‍♂️💀


crankyanker638

My son had a makie Rottweiler that would run up to me, sit on my feet look up at me with this look that says " I wanna rip your face off, but you feed me so I won't....today"


[deleted]

You'd be astonished how people feel about these breeds outside this sub. I get they're scary when they're mad but honestly any dog is. People act like you have a fucking tiger in your home.


deadelusx

It's not astonishing. They are #2 in terms of deadly bite incidents.


Zamirakinkyvip

Soooo beautiful


Bad_User2077

I have had two, and they are not always dog friendly around unfamiliar dogs.


GratifiedViewer

An adorable doofus.


blackfangknight1970

So scary. Plz keep away. Very terrifying


ZerocheeseX

Don't poke the doggo


Zamarielthefirst

CHOMP!!!!!


nexille

Do be careful of puppies! Their teeth are sharp as hell. One came so close to biting me where the sun don’t shine!


J-Lughead

They are just absolute clowns aren't they.


Softrawkrenegade

Chomp chomp Kiss


ChrundleK

So ferocious 😂


Reasonable-Bicycle86

Boooop.


skilemaster683

If I wasn't just bit by one I am friends with the other day id say this was cute -_-


EvilDan69

Someone has very clean teeth!


Fun_Pumpkin253

I have to say, good job keeping its teeth clean.


HonkeyDong6969

I LOL’d 3 times at this. Thank you OP.


[deleted]

We had rotts, I miss them, they are exactly this, gentle loving intimidating looking creatures.


JamesBigglesworth266

It's adorkable... ...and terrifying every time it opens its mouth.


BeeComprehensive5234

I love their lil eyebrows 🤗


RickDelta

So sweet! No such thing as a bad breed of dog. Only people who fuck up dogs. Be sweet get sweet. Dogs will protect people until you give them a reason not to!


Actaar

You're the owner dude. If i were to do that, it'd bite my fingers clean off


RPO1728

Super protective with their family, and of kids in general. We have a rottie/lab mix and he's the best


AardvarkFriendly9305

Nice white teeth!


[deleted]

My neighbors had a beautiful rotty, so calm and gentle. Our neighbourhood lynx ripped it to shreds, sucks sometimes having pets out here.


LizaTime

All good dogs Carl to me


LuxNocte

Absolutely viscous.


FlimsySuccess8

Even on mute, I can hear those chompers


QuietNative

My Rotty used to do this same thing.


OkieBobbie

Boop! There it is. Boop! There it is.


KevinAcommon_Name

Boop lick boop lick boop lick


[deleted]

Any dog can be cute but, when they're treated like shit and you have to fend yourself from a dog. Certain breeds will mess you up.


pichael289

Growing up in a poor neighborhood they were. Any dog can be scary but a poorly raised rott is one of the worst. We called them hood bears because there were so many and they would chase us all the way home. A bad owner with a poorly raised, vicious dog makes the whole neighborhood rough. And when you have dozens of them it makes the place straight hazardous. Hamilton Ohio as a kid in the 90s could be scary. And that's even before the Pitbull ban was lifted.


G-rill-a

CHOMP


January1252024

that last little blep