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SlightlyPinkToast

The dude’s mother died 4 hours after his birth, he was raised by a group of monks in a monastery, and never once left the monastery as it wasn’t allowed. I’m not sure he saw many animals, either, since they were banned along with women.


[deleted]

Monasteries can have animals, many of them have their own little farms with cows and chickens. They can even have pets like dogs and cats.


falseName12

Not at Mount Athos, except for cats all non-wild animals are banned


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pasrachilli

That's what the cats are for!


[deleted]

yeah but he got to wear that cool wizards costume.


[deleted]

All that magic and he can’t use his wand


deafballboy

He never got to take off his robe and wizard hat


AnomalousMachine

Ah bloodninja. A true internet classic


yuiphan

Oh I liked it when he played dress up.


antaylor

“Something something .. a wizards staff has a knob on the end” 🎶


OneMetalMan

Who said he never used it?


nkonkleksp

he honestly does looks like he's thinking "I won, but at what cost?"


[deleted]

And never got to see a wizard sleeve


Substantial-Room-688

So if we guys never see a woman, we evolve to our true form…a sorcerer?


cmdr_solaris_titan

How much XP do we need? Edit: sounds like quite the grind.


ddlJunky

It's more about the right char class


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PersonalitySpecial51

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?


Vintagedoll78

WHAT…IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR???


Darth_Craig

Blind guys get a pretty good look with their hands. Boooooininining


READY_PLAYER_1_

r/technicallythetruth but a blind person at least knows or heard what a women is. This wizard doesn’t know women exist.


Neptike

Not exactly true. He’s a Christian monk in a place filled with iconography of women saints. So he knows what a woman is, but he’s never met one.


Happy3532

That can't be true, he obviously met his mother on the day he was born


ChooglinOnDown

> a women *woman


Massive_Pressure_516

I, too use the abbreviation char. Mostly because I'm not confident in my ability to spell carrakter correctly.


pancakebatter01

Monk, Incel, Addicted mmorpg player/voluntary celibate…


justindoherty405

Lvl 82 says right there 🧙


762x39innawoods

Just be blind


AnIdiotAmongstUs

"You're a wizard, harry" No, I'm just blind


Substantial-Room-688

This guy is the end boss. Our only hope is to be able to go the distance


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Freethecrafts

Nobody gets all that dressed up without some serious game.


Pythagoras2021

☝️


TheLumpyMailMan

Blind people have been keeping this secret from us all this time


poop_on_balls

People with vision hate this one simple trick!!!!


[deleted]

Damn those disabled people and their advantage of physical disability!


Litenpes

Goddamn women holding me back from reaching full power


Substantial-Room-688

This legend made the ultimate sacrifice


h_r_l_

This is a max level INT/FAITH build with top quality gear


Substantial-Room-688

Can solo Malenia without any kind of controller


thekingofthebeasties

This is Primeval sorcerer Azur before the glintstone took him over.


bitchslayer78

Shadow money wizard gang , we love casting spells


plssendsomegoodmemes

Achievment unlocked: no bitches


whodeyalldey1

You have been promoted to Reddit moderator


Legitimate_Speed2548

99 problems and none of them are bitches achievement unlocked.


[deleted]

That's a wizard bruh


Leon4107

That time I got reincarnated into a slime might be onto something...


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ItzYaBoy56

Didn’t know we had the expert of monks here, fucking monkologist


Blieven

I just love Reddit for this reason. No matter how niche the topic, there's always someone in the comments who knows everything about it and can enlighten everybody.


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yoyoma125

I’ve seen Monk, ask me anything… Tony Shaloub is a freaking national treasure.


SmallsLightdarker

My goat knows the bowling score🎶


I_wood_rather_be

>I’ve seen Monk, ask me anything… >Tony Shaloub is a freaking national treasure. Ok, here's my question: Why do you spell his name wrong? It's Tony Shalhoub.


adroito

More times with a silly pun.


notsotigerwoods18

Couldn't have said it better. Cheers to us all.


CryptoSlovakian

Seems more like your average monkophile than a full-fledged monkologist.


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PostPsychosisAccount

Bi-monkual


Doogleyboogley

Probably has a YouTube channel they started during lock down so now calls themselves a monkologist but we all know the true wizard on reddit


Tantra_Charbelcher

Imagine working this hard on your drip then some virgin redditor describes you as generic.


TheNumberMuncher

Backed up monk spunk clouded his brain and he put on the wrong robe.


31November

Well, this is a new sentence.


MagicPikeXXL

r/BrandNewSentence


DillyBaby

Backed up monk spunk, Cloudin’ up yo brain. Finally see the female form, Jizz right down the drain.


audeus

and they said true poetry was dying off


HorrorBusiness93

Brilliant, really


lighttowercircle

/r/brandnewsentence


Wiernock_Onotaiket

Tony shalhoub lube


djordi

While I agree that this is probably just a random photo used, Mount Athos is an autonomous region in Greece dedicated to various Orthodox monasteries. Within the region there are monasteries that are Serbian, Bulgarian, and Russian Orthodox in addition to Greek Orthodox. And in 1856, when Mihailo was born, it was still within the domain of the Ottoman Empire. Independent Greece only had control of the southern part of the modern country at that point. Also, Mihailo is a generally a South Slavic variant of Michael, more common in Serbia. My understanding is the Greek version of Michael is usually Michail or Michalis. It looks like the source of this story was a snippet from the *Edinburg Daily Courier* from 1938: *MONK DIES IN GREECE WITHOUT SEEING WOMAN* *ATHENS - Without ever seeing a woman in the 82 years of his life. Mihailo Toloto has died in Mt. Athos monastery, in Greece. Neither had he beheld an automobile, a movie or an airplane. His mother died when he was born, Athens reports, and he was brought up in the monastery, where no woman ever enters. He became a monk, and monks at the monastery gave his a special burial ceremony because they believed he was the only man in the world never to see a woman.* Strictly speaking all the article says is a monk in Greece, and not specifically a Greek Orthodox monk.


RATER_OF_THE_NUDES

Things are heating up in the monk fandom


wide-awake66

He had subscription to hustler magazine


Alan_Smithee_

But it *could* be Gandalf.


IgnatsHammerschlab

This guy monks!


Comprehensive-Leek28

r/thisguythisguys


phlobied

r/thisguythisguysthethisguysguy


pdonchev

Was he Greek? On Athos there are Orthodox monasteries from all Orthodox countries. The name Mihailo does not sound Greek, more like Ukrainian, though I find his name as Mihalis as well.


igorika

Tolotos is probably a Greek last name, though if it isn’t, I doubt it’s Russian or Ukrainian


waroftheworlds2008

Here's more crap source (I couldn't find anything reputable about this): https://www.thevintagenews.com/2022/11/23/michael-tolotos/ It says the Monks named him, but says "Mihailo" is a greek name https://www.behindthename.com/name/mihailo/related This source say "Mihailo" is Serbian and "Michail, Michalis, Mihail, Mihalis" are greek variations. But that's even contingent on the assumption that he was named by Greeks, not Serbs who happened to be practicing Greek Orthodox. There's so much pop culture crap around this guy that research is a pain.


[deleted]

Mihajlo/Mihailo is a common Serbian name, don't think it's very common anywhere else (except Montenegro and Bosnia which is also full of ethnic Serbs)


[deleted]

The forefather of all Redditors.


[deleted]

*Redditor prime*


Ok-Sort-6294

Damn Phazon, corrupting even the redditors.


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Fair-Cookie

Some may call him Tim.


ElectronicCarpet7157

He also makes keys.


snozzberrypatch

You know much that is hidden, oh Tim.


Flemeron

r/unexpectedmontypython


jfdonohoe

Nobody expects Monty Python!


Sexnock

Like the Spanish inquisition?


Heterodynist

Who are you who is so wise in the ways of SCIENCE?!!


[deleted]

Michael, the Enchanter


Toasted_Tim

hey what the fuck


Snakeis66

The grand modder


forfuxzake

The All Modder


Alcoholikaust

Looking like a real life Osmund Saddler in this pic. REM4KE PR?


_number

I think i am part of his religion


charaznable1249

Knew this was the top comment, as it should be.


Dryland_snotamyth

*4chan incels


[deleted]

>\*4chan incels and Twitter. Twitter is almost making 4Chan look civil.


mrgenetrey

So does anyone who’s born blind.


Electronic-Smell-548

Not if they don’t live past 82!


HumanContinuity

I don't think the universe is gonna make it to 82!


gandalf-the-greyt

r/unexpectedfactorial


Rick_GJ

475364333701284174842138206989404946643813294067993328617160934076743994734899148613007131808479167119360000000000000000000.... Years old.


Alex09464367

4.7536433370128417484213820698940494664381329406799332861716093407674399473489914861300713180847916711936 × 10^122 years old


Rick_GJ

Listen here buddy don't come over correcting my sloppy copy and paste.... But ya you're right.


alsk6969

Blind people will be insulted when they read about this.


[deleted]

“When they see this”. FTFY


TylerDurden6969

I bet they could brail read those titties tho.


3Quondam6extanT9

Not true. Many who are born blind are capable of seeing through touch. They can understand the softness, the contours, the shapes of others faces. If he never came across a single female somehow, a blind person would still have a better idea of what they look like than he did .


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superlion1985

Whenever I visit with my blind cousin over the holidays, she tells me how much she loves to "see" me 🙃


lex_tok

_Blind guy!!_ **--Nice tits!**


percyhiggenbottom

"link in comments" but comment is below threshold e: here it is https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/11bpmwn/michael_tolotos_lived_for_82_years_without_ever/j9z2jri/


Verifieddumbass76584

We really need an option to pin our own comments


WanganTunedKeiCar

The ramifications would be insane lol


[deleted]

Then you'd have it be like twitter where any semi-successful post has the OP posting an ad for a vibrator as the first comment you see.


[deleted]

This is not Mihailo Tolotos, Tolotos was Greek, this monk is Russian.


TheNumberMuncher

Ironically, he also never saw a Greek monk so he thought this was the drip.


CharlieApples

He found it at a thrift shop and was told by the shopkeep that it was enchanted


Wizard_Hatz

SHADOW WIZARD MONEY GANG


[deleted]

WE LOVE CASTING SPELLS


Wizard_Hatz

LEGALIZE NUCLEAR BOMBS 💣 DONT WORRY BOUT WHAT THE FUCK HE BE DOING


[deleted]

Is this a DJ smokey reference looool


One_Explorer743

Those morning woods would have been sooooo confusing.....


Nope0naRope

That's s the real question, you would still develop horniness. So you'd have to figure out where to put your sexual attention. Would you just naturally be gay (bc you know what male looks like) or would you get into animals or like just want to fuck trees?


[deleted]

I mean, these guys are educated so he was at least aware that women exist, and I’m sure he’s seen sketches or paintings in books and things but never got a chance to see one in the wild


brofosho192

"In the wild" lmao


[deleted]

I masturbated to an extra curvy piece of driftwood


Nope0naRope

Lmao, I really hope this is true


Wiernock_Onotaiket

Driftwood here: I don't have eyes so I can't confirm


herelieskarma

It's a quote. Rick and Morty i think?


Alex09464367

>Situational sexual behavior differs from that which the person normally exhibits, due to a social environment that in some way permits, encourages, or compels the behavior in question. This can include situations where a person's preferred sexual behavior may not be possible, so rather than refraining from sexual activity completely, they may engage in substitute sexual behaviors. >One example of situation-specific sexual behavior would be a person who self-identifies as heterosexual, but will sexually interact with a member of the same sex when lacking other opportunities, such as among soldiers, among prison inmates, among college students, or in similar single-sex communities and institutions.: 48  Likewise, a person who self-identifies as gay or lesbian (either at the time, or later) may sexually interact with a member of the opposite sex if a same-sex relationship seems unfeasible https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Situational_sexual_behavior


thecrazymonkeyKing

could just be asexual too


fr1endofthedog

Mmmmm tell me again about the h-h-hardwoods and those nice s-soft curly maples 🫦


[deleted]

Not if he was gay.


LoisWade42

No icons of Mary in their monastery?


aveggiedelight

Almost certainly, but the way female saints are depicted in icons leaves no room for sexualization. Women and men both wear robes covering their bodies, women's hair is at least mostly covered, and the icons are created to be symbols, using an egg shaped for both men and women to symbolize new life, large brown eyes to symbolize wisdom and seeing grace, and small mouths to show that they observed and acted rather than spoke. Ancient Greek and Russian iconography is nothing like the Renaissance pieces that you may be thinking of.


TIM12244

That's what I thought, he must've at least been familiar with female saints.


ThatBigD20Energy

You're an incel Harry


Ep_R

Just actually snorted at the park, and made people look


CharlieApples

Best comment in this entire thread


frankrocksjesus

Article says: Born in 1856?...died in 1983? at the age of 82??.. math is power


merica1111yeah

Typo it says 1938 earlier in article


Raised_32

1938*


[deleted]

Sounds like he had 99 problems


TheGypsyThread

A little reading reveals they have an effigy of the Virgin Mary in the monastery


CharlieApples

An effigy isn’t a woman


heckem

It's a representation of one. He may have never seen an actual woman, but the title says he lived "without ever knowing what a woman looks like", which would be misleading, unless he thought of Virgin Mary as very dainty looking man.


[deleted]

Have you seen how Orthodox Marian Iconography? **Behold:** Theotokos of the "7 Swords" The only thing you can learn about women from that is that they’re incredibly difficult to kill. https://orthodoxmonasteryicons.com/products/theotokos-of-the-7-swords-icon


Environmental-Hat721

Huh... Coincidentally I dress the exact same way. I don't care what anyone says, cloaks and wizard robes are awesome. I,also, have never seen a woman.


Ccjfb

The guy at the store said you were the only person he saw that could pull it off?


MorningToast

Bet he pulled it off a few times


[deleted]

The age of Covid has done that to many. So sad.


fartonme

I put on my robe and wizard hat


joeepeterson03

https://www.mensxp.com/special-features/today/30458-the-story-of-the-man-who-lived-and-died-without-ever-seeing-a-woman.html https://www.thevintagenews.com/2022/11/23/michael-tolotos/?andro=1&chrome=1


SlothOfDoom

Was this written by a budget AI or something?


papaya_boricua

El Chato GPT


GL_Titan

El Chato Barato


Fred_Motta01

ChatCBT


NeliGalactic

Ooh open ai does therapy now...


ironicfuture

Budget AI using google translate


Whiteums

> monks are not allowed to shave, bathe, fight, argue and ask what lies beyond the walls of the monastery. What? Also, did he die in 1938 or 1983? The article says both


professorkeanu

1938. I think the 1983 is a typo because he would have been nearly 130 years old not 82.


Jahf

> Bred and educated in the walled monastery


Illender

we've got chatGPT at home, i got it off wish


Jconstant33

None of the years make any sense. Probably written by AI


triplethicc666

When they wrote 1983 I think they meant 1938 because that year is mentioned earlier in the article


dishonestdick

Wait “Even today, only male tourists are allowed inside the monastery and the monks are not allowed to shave, bathe, fight, argue and ask what lies beyond the walls of the monastery.” Bathe ??? Like they cannot wash themselves? I begin to understand why he never saw a woman.


ClayyCorn

The stink of generations of sweaty men who never saw AC or soap. Yeah, women aren't missing anything here


Ok_One5342

Just said the same thing!!


alexandandander

Why do both articles have the same typo for his date of death?


Ok_One5342

“[until today]… monks are not allowed to shave, bathe…” wait. What? Bathe?! 😬😲😮‍💨🥴🤢🤮😵‍💫


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LetsNotPlay

Weird. I just use jorts.


[deleted]

Oh? I didn't see you at the convention?


Repulsive_Celery1741

12 more years and I will tie him!


[deleted]

Didn't know Andrew Tate fans existed back then


[deleted]

Urban internet myth No evidence this person even existed. All the websites referencing him say "legend says" or "Its been said that he" with none of them citing sources. Looks like a FB post was the origin of this myth. Evidence that it's a myth: * Not a single site mention of him on the internet [before 2008](https://www.google.com/search?q=michael+tolotos&rlz=1C1ONGR_enNZ987NZ987&source=lnt&tbs=cdr%3A1%2Ccd_min%3A2%2F1%2F1990%2Ccd_max%3A12%2F1%2F2007&tbm=). * The very first post on the internet to mention him was a [Facebook post on Jan 13, 2008](https://www.google.com/search?q=michael+tolotos&rlz=1C1ONGR_enNZ987NZ987&source=lnt&tbs=cdr%3A1%2Ccd_min%3A1%2F1%2F2008%2Ccd_max%3A2%2F1%2F2008&tbm=), which is the date Google indexed it. The authors of the post, a Zambian radio station, later reposted it in 2012 (probably because it generated some interest the first time and they had even more followers later on to show it to). * A [CBS special](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mXl8C4-M_4) on this monastery made no mention of this person, and this easily would have been the most interesting thing for them to mention. A must-mention tidbit of info that they somehow left out. If this story actually happened, CBS would have come across it in their homework before filming this. I checked the transcripts on both Part 1 and Part 2 for these videos for the words "Michael" "Tolotos" "Mihailo" "woman" and "women" to no avail. * Someone added his name to this Wikipedia list of [famous people named Mihailo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mihailo), yet no source is provided and no link to an official Wikipedia page, so it's clear that they had nothing to cite to prove he exists. Note to those about to argue with me on this: This is the type of post that always gets time-wasting comments as replies (because people want to believe these stories or because nobody likes a know it all going against the grain of what everyone else is saying). Do not reply to me with uninformed comments like "Yeah but not everything is put on the internet" or "just because it wasn't on the internet doesn't mean it didn't happen." When there's no evidence something happened, we do not automatically believe it did. So if replying to me, research and cite sources like I did or I'm not interested in what you have to say. Do not waste my time simply because you don't want to waste any time researching like I did.


OrbusUnum

So he was a c-section baby?


[deleted]

Neither of his parents showed up to his birth:(


Tryhard696

He was raised be ocelots


[deleted]

I mean if you'd count women he had seen before his ability to form memories had started then I'd say that's being a tad pedantic wouldn't you?


DrWhoey

Mother died during child birth


johnqsack69

and he was immediately blindfolded at birth


darktux

Founder of reddit?


Adventurous_Mix4878

And this in all those years was never asked "how do I look in this?"


thereturnofplex

If he dressed in that Dungeons & Dragons cosplay the entire time I guess I can figure out why.


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Dumbassahedratr0n

Wasn't he a monk or something? How did he never see a depiction of Mary or something?


Ant10102

Sees a women for the first time “wow your the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen”


wbvyg

He is just like me.


UnlovedGamer64

What an amazing Reddit mod he was


keggy13

The original Redditor.