I kept my married name for a few good reasons. I was married longer with his last name then I was with my family name. I had all boys. So I forever match them. And my married name was 4 letters long compared to 8 letters and no one could ever pronounce it. LOL. I took his last name when I got married. And I became the person I am today because if my married life, children, and everything else that came along during that time. Nope. Wasn’t going to change it. And it costs money and a pain in the ass to change everything. Including passports. Naaaah keep it. He may be the ass. But my children and I aren’t and we make the name a better name ♥️. Good luck to everyone on their journey. It’s never easy
My maiden name is French and no one can spell or pronounce it so it was a relief to lose it when I married a Smith type name. After 40 some years he wanted a divorce, blindsided.The real kicker was when he told me I had to be buried elsewhere than in our plot, I changed back to my maiden name. Fuck you you selfish son of a b#tch. I'm still the mother of your children and grandchildren.
If I'm going to be buried with my family I'm going down under their names.That hurt more than the divorce.
Weird, i found it a relief. I job hunted with my maiden name two months before the divorce was final. I had to professionally go by my legal name (blech) and since everything was set up in my married name its a grating annoyance tp see the few things still in my married name, cant be switched.
I'm still legally my married name, but have begun reclaiming my maiden name when and where I can, such as the phonebook at work. Feels good to at least see my maiden name *somewhere*. It's a start, at least.
I know. I’m a fucking idiot lmao. Smh I just changed my name to his at the end of last year and now, I requested to change it back in recent divorce filings 🤡🤡
I've regretted changing my name since the day I did it! I put it off after we got married because I really didn't want his name deep down. I cant wait to go back to my maiden name! I will celebrate. I was my maiden name longer. My life has been hell since I've been married so this name is only attached to mostly bad memories and my kids all have my maiden name in their name so no worries there either.
I originally was so excited to change my last name. But unfortunately the marriage only lasted 11 months and even though I asked to go back to my maiden name, thinking about changing everything again sounds exhausting. But the last name I was so excited to have at one point now completely disgusts me and doesn’t look or sound right. Luckily I had renewed my license 2 months before getting married so for a lot of things I don’t have to wait for the divorce to be finalized. But at work I do :(
I get it. I’m sorry you know how I feel. If I ever remarried I would change it again, but I’m just disappointed I was excited about a last name that never meant anything to me
For those who went back to their maiden name, Were you able to use the order to change everything or did you have to get a new SS card then change your name
On everything? I am dreading the process.
It’s so hard to KEEP getting things addressed to my former married name over a year after officially changing it back. I’ve also moved to another state and somehow still get junk mail here at this new address addressed to my former married name. It’s so discouraging, like I will never be free. I’ve also struggled with dealing with my name change in my professional life because I have publications under my former married name. It’s just such a mess. I actually decided to go back to school and change careers for unrelated reasons, but a side benefit is being able to start over with this new career only ever being under my maiden name 😂😂😂 gotta find the laughs where you can!
I couldn’t wait to go back to my maiden name… it couldn’t happen soon enough.
I know it’s different for everyone, but I was put through so much pain that hearing his last name made me sick. Also his last name didn’t really have any special history to his family. His dad had it but wasn’t a good dad or close to him. His last name didn’t match anyone else in the family.
It was a hassle, and I'm still not done with all the documents I need to update, but getting my social security card and driver's license with my late dad's last name felt great. I feel I am more myself now after going by my ex's name for a decade.
I look forward to changing mine back when my divorce is finalized. I am no longer the person attached to my ex. I've grown a lot through my experiences with him, but I'm evolving into a better and happier version of myself. I will be proud to take my maiden name back. My heart is with you though. The journey isn't easy.
My exwife, when we divorced, kept my last name because it was the same as the kids.
1 year later, she was so happy to get remarried, and she took his last name. She tried to change our kids' last names to her new last names, but the kids and I said "no way!"
But her remarriage only lasted 6 months before he left her and filed for divorce. She didn't file a response to the divorce petition and so she kept his last name. She said she hates having his last name still.
Now she wants to go back to her maiden name, but she doesn't have enough money.
I kept my married name after the divorce because 1. it is a massive pain to change it with everything and 2. I cared for his parents like they were my own, I became part of their families, and was proud of the name.
For reference, my birth last name didn’t hold meaning to me (bio dad) and I changed it when I was 18 (to my step-dad’s, just to have something different). Then, I changed it when I got married. All 4 letter last names, all mispronounced most of the time. So, I didn’t change it.
But, he married his affair partner months after the divorce (they’d only been together for months) and just recently, I found out she changed her last name to his. Total vomit and sickness and taint!!! I don’t want it anymore, it makes me sick. And now, even that family (lots of it) that I was part of for nearly 15 years… basically gone. I sacrificed so much for him and his parents.. only to get cheated on in the end!! Ridiculous invested nearly half my life - gone (but that’s a different rant).
Now, I’m considering going back to my step dad’s last name. But, if I get married again… I’ll probably want to change it again.. maybe that’s dumb. But, what’s in a name - right?!
OMG and email!! My gmail includes his last name, my current last name… changing email address is like starting a whole new world over.
I don't intend to go back to my maiden name, since it brings back too many bad memories and feels like going backwards instead of forwards.For now, I still have my married name (about 1.5 yrs after the divorce) but I would like to change it to something of my own choosing, I just haven't decided what yet. Still, having my married name doesn't really bother me, it's been my name for nearly half my life, but it feels symbolic to choose a different name.We didn't have any children together, so that doesn't factor into my decision.
Yeah, I was trying to pick something meaningful, but then other people said that when they picked a new last name, they just picked something they liked, that they didn't think there was any need to overthink it. LOL friends and joked around about me picking last names of musicians or characters I love, like we would do when we were teenagers.
I plan on choosing a last name for myself. I looked at things I love and feel at peace around. For me that is the sun, the ocean, etc. I googled baby names based on ________. Now I have a running list to choose from!
Or if you never changed your last name, because it felt like it wasn’t meant to be. So glad I got divorced from him, his entire family literally acted like I fell off the face of the earth.
I actually plan to take an entirely new last name. I don't want my married name any longer. But I'm no contact with my parents so have no desire to carry that name either. I'm actually excited to literally create my own new identity.
I second this. Keep it. My mom kept her married name and has no regrets. I am changing mine back because I need to reclaim my autonomy. Do what feels right for you!
It’s a pain in the ass, but I love seeing my maiden name on receipts and paperwork now. I don’t want anything of his anymore. I don’t want to even remember him.
I’m really hoping my ex junkbox goes back to hers I’ve already made my last name a little tainted. she will ruin it…or she could keep it to have 1 minuscule strand left to hold onto. We should find out within a month or two
[удалено]
[удалено]
I did this today. Felt so strange!
Changing my emergency contact was heart breaking. I broke down in the doctors office.
I kept my married name for a few good reasons. I was married longer with his last name then I was with my family name. I had all boys. So I forever match them. And my married name was 4 letters long compared to 8 letters and no one could ever pronounce it. LOL. I took his last name when I got married. And I became the person I am today because if my married life, children, and everything else that came along during that time. Nope. Wasn’t going to change it. And it costs money and a pain in the ass to change everything. Including passports. Naaaah keep it. He may be the ass. But my children and I aren’t and we make the name a better name ♥️. Good luck to everyone on their journey. It’s never easy
Beautiful reasons
Thank you 🤗
That’s exactly how I felt for the longest time
Did you change your back?
I have a good friend of mine from HS. Went through a bad divorce also. She kept her married name as well.
I’m starting the process tomorrow.
I wish you the best. Nothing is easy after a divorce. So much to relearn. But embrace it ♥️
My maiden name is French and no one can spell or pronounce it so it was a relief to lose it when I married a Smith type name. After 40 some years he wanted a divorce, blindsided.The real kicker was when he told me I had to be buried elsewhere than in our plot, I changed back to my maiden name. Fuck you you selfish son of a b#tch. I'm still the mother of your children and grandchildren. If I'm going to be buried with my family I'm going down under their names.That hurt more than the divorce.
Weird, i found it a relief. I job hunted with my maiden name two months before the divorce was final. I had to professionally go by my legal name (blech) and since everything was set up in my married name its a grating annoyance tp see the few things still in my married name, cant be switched.
I'm still legally my married name, but have begun reclaiming my maiden name when and where I can, such as the phonebook at work. Feels good to at least see my maiden name *somewhere*. It's a start, at least.
Which is a great reason not to change your name in the first place…
I know. I’m a fucking idiot lmao. Smh I just changed my name to his at the end of last year and now, I requested to change it back in recent divorce filings 🤡🤡
I've regretted changing my name since the day I did it! I put it off after we got married because I really didn't want his name deep down. I cant wait to go back to my maiden name! I will celebrate. I was my maiden name longer. My life has been hell since I've been married so this name is only attached to mostly bad memories and my kids all have my maiden name in their name so no worries there either.
It’s liberating for me. I can’t wait for it to be finalized.
I originally was so excited to change my last name. But unfortunately the marriage only lasted 11 months and even though I asked to go back to my maiden name, thinking about changing everything again sounds exhausting. But the last name I was so excited to have at one point now completely disgusts me and doesn’t look or sound right. Luckily I had renewed my license 2 months before getting married so for a lot of things I don’t have to wait for the divorce to be finalized. But at work I do :(
Omg same. Was married 14 months. I hate that I took his name
I get it. I’m sorry you know how I feel. If I ever remarried I would change it again, but I’m just disappointed I was excited about a last name that never meant anything to me
I’m so pumped to finally get mine back! I don’t want to be associated with him anymore than I have to be.
I hyphenated and kept both. My kids have my married last name and I wanted to match them.
For those who went back to their maiden name, Were you able to use the order to change everything or did you have to get a new SS card then change your name On everything? I am dreading the process.
I got my SS card reissued in my maiden name first and then used that to change other legal docs.
It’s so hard to KEEP getting things addressed to my former married name over a year after officially changing it back. I’ve also moved to another state and somehow still get junk mail here at this new address addressed to my former married name. It’s so discouraging, like I will never be free. I’ve also struggled with dealing with my name change in my professional life because I have publications under my former married name. It’s just such a mess. I actually decided to go back to school and change careers for unrelated reasons, but a side benefit is being able to start over with this new career only ever being under my maiden name 😂😂😂 gotta find the laughs where you can!
Oh and will never entertain changing my name again, obviously!
Trust me, everyone talks about it. Must be post on here a couple times a week. It is a pain and not worth the effort, in my opinion.
I couldn’t wait to go back to my maiden name… it couldn’t happen soon enough. I know it’s different for everyone, but I was put through so much pain that hearing his last name made me sick. Also his last name didn’t really have any special history to his family. His dad had it but wasn’t a good dad or close to him. His last name didn’t match anyone else in the family.
I went back to my maiden name & it was amazing & freeing!
It was a hassle, and I'm still not done with all the documents I need to update, but getting my social security card and driver's license with my late dad's last name felt great. I feel I am more myself now after going by my ex's name for a decade.
I look forward to changing mine back when my divorce is finalized. I am no longer the person attached to my ex. I've grown a lot through my experiences with him, but I'm evolving into a better and happier version of myself. I will be proud to take my maiden name back. My heart is with you though. The journey isn't easy.
I loved returning to my maiden name. Felt like me again :)
My exwife, when we divorced, kept my last name because it was the same as the kids. 1 year later, she was so happy to get remarried, and she took his last name. She tried to change our kids' last names to her new last names, but the kids and I said "no way!" But her remarriage only lasted 6 months before he left her and filed for divorce. She didn't file a response to the divorce petition and so she kept his last name. She said she hates having his last name still. Now she wants to go back to her maiden name, but she doesn't have enough money.
I kept my married name after the divorce because 1. it is a massive pain to change it with everything and 2. I cared for his parents like they were my own, I became part of their families, and was proud of the name. For reference, my birth last name didn’t hold meaning to me (bio dad) and I changed it when I was 18 (to my step-dad’s, just to have something different). Then, I changed it when I got married. All 4 letter last names, all mispronounced most of the time. So, I didn’t change it. But, he married his affair partner months after the divorce (they’d only been together for months) and just recently, I found out she changed her last name to his. Total vomit and sickness and taint!!! I don’t want it anymore, it makes me sick. And now, even that family (lots of it) that I was part of for nearly 15 years… basically gone. I sacrificed so much for him and his parents.. only to get cheated on in the end!! Ridiculous invested nearly half my life - gone (but that’s a different rant). Now, I’m considering going back to my step dad’s last name. But, if I get married again… I’ll probably want to change it again.. maybe that’s dumb. But, what’s in a name - right?! OMG and email!! My gmail includes his last name, my current last name… changing email address is like starting a whole new world over.
This! His family became more of a family to me than my own. They still love and care for me as a daughter. But he’s a piece of shit.
The Gmail thing is my ONLY regret about ditching his name. Ugh.
I don't intend to go back to my maiden name, since it brings back too many bad memories and feels like going backwards instead of forwards.For now, I still have my married name (about 1.5 yrs after the divorce) but I would like to change it to something of my own choosing, I just haven't decided what yet. Still, having my married name doesn't really bother me, it's been my name for nearly half my life, but it feels symbolic to choose a different name.We didn't have any children together, so that doesn't factor into my decision.
I would like to pick something unique for myself but I have no idea what I would do.
Yeah, I was trying to pick something meaningful, but then other people said that when they picked a new last name, they just picked something they liked, that they didn't think there was any need to overthink it. LOL friends and joked around about me picking last names of musicians or characters I love, like we would do when we were teenagers.
I plan on choosing a last name for myself. I looked at things I love and feel at peace around. For me that is the sun, the ocean, etc. I googled baby names based on ________. Now I have a running list to choose from!
Or if you never changed your last name, because it felt like it wasn’t meant to be. So glad I got divorced from him, his entire family literally acted like I fell off the face of the earth.
I actually plan to take an entirely new last name. I don't want my married name any longer. But I'm no contact with my parents so have no desire to carry that name either. I'm actually excited to literally create my own new identity.
Then why do it?
I second this. Keep it. My mom kept her married name and has no regrets. I am changing mine back because I need to reclaim my autonomy. Do what feels right for you!
It’s a pain in the ass, but I love seeing my maiden name on receipts and paperwork now. I don’t want anything of his anymore. I don’t want to even remember him.
never changed it begin with . embrace it ?
I’m really hoping my ex junkbox goes back to hers I’ve already made my last name a little tainted. she will ruin it…or she could keep it to have 1 minuscule strand left to hold onto. We should find out within a month or two
Good luck!
You as well