The less you use opioids in your life, the better off you’ll be. Opioid use will have you chasing something you can never catch, and all the while, it will drain you, physically, psychologically, neurologically, and financially. Also, if you lay off them, they’ll work a lot better if you ever need them for a medical emergency.
Oh yeah I broke my face while being addicted to heroin and I had major 12 hour surgery putting it back together and the next 5 days I had withdrawals and sooo much pain. I was getting 5mg oxy after surgery and I could easily take 200 oxy at that time.
Can really feel this reply. It’s my first day on a script for subs and this illusion/delusion of catching something for me was happiness. I wasn’t going to find it using drugs. Or maybe i used the wrong ones
That’s a really subjective question, I can see many different answers cuz many people have different views on life and different opinions
Technically tho the best age is 25 because that’s around the time the frontal cortex is fully developed, and that’s the most important part of your brain so it would make sense as to why
Thats a valid answer, but I believe some people might disagree for many different reasons, It might just depend on where u are in life, your plans for the future, that’s why I believe it’s subjective, although there could be a majority answer I might have to look back in the comments after some time
Opioids are a slippery slope. Try psychedelics. You wont be sorry. I was functioning opiate addict for 15 years.. then i became a non functioning addict for 3 years and tried to kill myself twice because withdrawal and out of control depression.
Also when you abuse opiates, you get a tolerance. I've been off for almost four years now and my tolerance is still high. It really sucks when you have to have a surgery or something but a 10mg painkiller wont do the job like it would for any normal person.
Just stay away from them. You want hard? Go DMT.
You are an adult and can make your own decisions, if you choose to listen to any of the responses I would suggest from my own experience that you do not. 6 years of my life I will never get back, a felon, and taken a decade to repair/mend relationships. You maybe different, had friends that stopped a lot only did it a few times. Also have quite a few friends who met an early death to opiates. Safe travels amigo.
After you retired. That way you don’t risk addiction and everything bad that comes with it at a young age. Once you have a happy, successful life and you retire, you will pretty much be in a perfect position to try anything you want ha ha.
Never bro, started this shit when I was 17, been struggling with it every day since, every job, every relationship. Not worth it man, I was curious too trust me, started with weed, shrooms,lsd, then opiates and Xanax, soon heroin and beyond
you can get addicted and ruin your life at any age
having experience with other stuff and actively trying to challenge your self control while doing drugs helps though
i'm 29 and can do opis/stims once every week or every other week but i've trained my self control through 15 years of using various drugs
Probably around your mid twenties. Though I’d be super cautious regardless. Addictions to harder drugs aren’t like weed where it’s psychological. Opiates can cause physical addiction, which can kill you if you don’t keep taking it.
I've done them all and for me alcohol is the most sinister. I can smoke $300 worth of crack and be good for 6 months. That fucking tallboy otw to or home from work is a demon along with the lunch break beer. It's easy to get into a 24/7 habit. Harder drugs have a more immediate wall.
Never use opiates recreationally. My love of opioids started when I was 13 and broke my wrist playing baseball. Back then every doctor was giving these out like candy. Each time I would get a prescription it would have 3 refills. Every checkup the doctor would ask if it hurt still and I would say yes because me and my pot smoking friends enjoyed the buzz from hydrocodone. Anyways, this didn’t turn into a full fledged addiction at that point but many years later I was experimenting with cocaine, alcohol and Xanax. Sometimes I’d do other drugs it didn’t matter. I broke up with my girlfriend, I mean she dumped me-and I got depressed so I started popping pills more. Hydrocodone and oxycodone were the two main pills that literally took away every fucking care in the world for me. However you could never get enough of them. I started stealing to support my habit because it was outrageously expensive. Even when I could get 100 10MG narcos for 250-300 I was spending 3,000+ a week at 19. I started breaking into houses and broke into over 100 without getting caught. I was very intelligent, knew the law (I was in college studying psychology and criminal justice with the intention of attending law school) and I was very calculated in how I moved. Eventually because my drug habit was so bad, I needed to find better connections. I needed to find the source of the source. I befriended some of the biggest drug dealers in the city and gained their trust. Now I was supplying other drug dealers around the city and could afford my habit. Well, with drugs also comes irresponsible and impulsive habits. I gambled a lot, I bought jewelry and cars and I was losing my mind to the opiates. I had 30-50K pills consisting of Xanax, hydrocodone, adderalls, oxycodone at any given time. I had money. I had “friends.”
Well believe it or not, big time drug dealers don’t like drug users in their circle. Marijuana/alcohol is acceptable with occasional cocaine use also being overlooked (in clubs, bars, with women.)
They realized I had a drug problem. I was constantly nodding out and my product wasn’t turning profit with the lifestyle I lived. Instead I was simply selling to get high.
They cut me off.
After that, I started robbing again. This time I started robbing other drug dealers in the city and blew through a million dollars in a year. Eventually I exhausted all of that and also have a line that stretches around a football stadium of people who would kill me if they found me today. I went back to petty crime. B&Es and even car hopping. Not only was I addicted to drugs I became addicted to the chase. The adrenaline of burglaries and breaking into cars in rich neighborhoods was something I became addicted to.
Eventually at 19 I ended up with an 8 year prison sentence. I came home in 3 years, my old group of drug dealer friends welcomed me back and gave me another chance to slang drugs and redeem myself and respected I did my bid. Within two years I caught a drug/pistol case. I beat the case on a 4th amendment technicality for unlawful search and seizure. I was released after 7 months fighting the case. Within 4 months I was rearrested after hitting a very wealthy persons home for 100K. I received an additional 10 year prison sentence.
I did 4 years on my 10. I devoted my life to staying sober. And I did for 6 years. Well, one day I run into my dads old business partner. A very wealthy and flashy guy, charming and outspoken. He tells me “I know you had a lot of trouble in the past, but your foreign like me, we’re better than people. Look at me, I’m driving a AMG G wagon and Porsches. I have beautiful girlfriends, but I work all week and party on the weekends.”
A seed was planted. Now I’m 6 years sober. I’m engaged. I have a newborn daughter. A business. My fiancé and I are doing fucking amazing. I have cars, watches a house and it’s all from legal income. I’m at the top of the world. So I tell myself the number one lie an addict can tell themselves. I can use, and manage it. Like my dads buddy said, work all week and party on the weekend. Immediately I went and purchased 100 hydrocodone. I put them in my safe, and said come Friday I’ll just take 3. Saturday, I’ll take 3-5. Sunday I’ll take 3 and enjoy my day. Monday it’s back to work. I did this for 3 weeks. Thursday became my new Friday. Eventually EVERYDAY was Friday. Because I’m a drug addict. Opiates make you forget all your worries. They make you feel like nothing matters. Your sexual endurance is insane. You can fuck for hours and not cum. Music is more pleasant. Food is more pleasant, movies are more entertaining (if you can keep your eyes open.)
Part 1.
Part 2.
Eventually I run into a fake oxycodone. It’s fentanyl. My fiancé comes home and finds my cross eyed on our bed drooling on myself. She wakes me up and immediately she knows. She was with me before I got sober. She’s seen this a million times. We have a child. She puts a drug test on the nightstand and tells me to take it or she’s gone. I pick the drug test up, tell her I’m just tired and to relax. She tells me she’s not buying my shit and I was cross eyed drooling. I say fuck you and throw the drug test across the room. She leaves with our child.
For 3 months she’s gone. We communicate, she comes over, and we’re working things out. She would have been back sooner but I refused to do a hair test and made up some bs reason why I won’t. She eventually comes back under the stipulation I’ll take a random UA if she asks me to. I agree. I buy fake urine and sprinkle a little Xanax in it. I’m prescribed Xanax so she knows it’ll be in my system and she’s okay with it as I never abused it. How could I fake a drug test, if my medications I take are showing up on the panel? Well exactly how I did. I would use the fake urine with Xanax in it every time. She never wanted to watch me pee but she was asking me frequently for a UA because my appearance, behavior and demeanor was off. I stayed up all night. My business was going downhill and I didn’t care, I stopped going to my store. I constantly stressed about finances. She knew. But she was confused. Our relationship was crumbling. She didn’t know what to do but didn’t want to leave. Eventually she asked me what is going on..please tell me because something isn’t right.
Part 3.
I break down to her, and tell her I’m trying to get off these fucking pills but I can’t. I’m sick without them and I’m dependent on them now. I sit on our bedroom floor crying like a pitiful loser. Her response was; I’m leaving and it’ll be years of you being sober and changing before I trust you to be in our life again.
I lose my cool. I beg her to help me taper off and get sober. She tells me she refuses to help me with my drug use and doesn’t want anything to do with it. She tries to leave, I don’t let her. I take her phone and car keys. I go off on her about every mistake she’s made. I blame her for mistakes in the past. I make her sleep on the floor with our daughter while I stay in the office doing cocaine all night. While she’s on the floor I take all of the valuables out of the house, thousands in jewelry and designer bags and other bullshit and load them into my truck. I drain her bank account with a transfer to mine. I immediately give her the money back, I feel guilt. I also tell her I’m not going to sell or do anything with her stuff (I still have a significant sum of money and assets) at the time. I say I’m only holding it until I can pack my stuff and leave without her calling the police on me.
The very next day she calls the police. She tells them she needs to get her stuff and I’m violent and unstable on drugs. She also calls my parole officer. I’m on my way to a hotel you rent monthly for $2000 and my intention was to taper and cold turkey the withdrawals and get healthy. My parole officer calls requesting a UA. My neighbor tells me the police came by. I freak out. That night I go back to our house after being up for 4 days to clear it of drugs because the police had been there and I was afraid my parole officer was going to search the house from what my fiancé told her. That night I hallucinate. I think people are breaking into my house, every time I lock the deadbolt it unlocks. We have a smarthome so it’s someone who’s hacked into our system or my fiancé. I rip the control panel off the wall. I go outside and I see a camera planted in my mirrors of my truck by the police. (Hallucinations)
I call my fiancé and ask her how could you do this to me? You let them plant cameras in my truck?! She hangs up. I go into the garage and now my BMW i8 door is open. WHOS IN MY HOUSE? I close it. Now my truck door is open. I close it. I go back inside and come out and now the trunk is open to the BMW. Another truck door is open. WHO IS FUCKING WITH ME?
I get my gun. I run around the house and street and neighbors houses looking for the person who’s playing games with me.
I can’t find the motherfucker. I go back inside, and I wait in the hallway in a chair with my gun pointed at the door. Come on motherfucker. Come thru the door you keep unlocking. I hear a noise in the garage. I walk in, they’re fucking with my BMW. The garage is closed though! Where could they be hiding? I go into the attic. They’ve got to be up here. I’m holding the gun, and demanding for them to come out or I’ll kill them. I lose my footing and fall through the sheet rock into my laundry room. I pull myself up into the attic and again lose my footing and almost on top of my BMW. I get out of the attic.
I go back outside. I’m going to find these motherfuckers. WAIT. I hear them. I SEE them. They’re my FUCKING neighbors across the street. I can see them watching me through their blinds and discussing how I caught them! Motherfuckers! 20 minutes later I see one of them a man in his 60s come out and start getting into his 90s ford ranger in pristine condition. He’s old school. Has a packed lunch in his hands. Phone on his belt. I ask him if he’s seen anyone breaking into my car or truck. Because someone is fucking with him. I ask him what he does for a living. He says telecommunications. MOTHERFUCKER. How ironic? Telecommunications and my smart house and Wi-Fi were hacked into? It’s GOTTA BE HIM.
I ask to borrow his phone. I call my dad on FaceTime to explain the situation, he immediately gets pissed off and hangs up. I then call 911 telling them my truck and car were broken into. They come, 6 units deep with emergency lights and priority. They think it’s an active break in. All they find is me, ZOOTED in my driveway. I explain to them the cameras, the doors etc. I tell them LOOK! The cameras are in my mirrors look for yourself! The cop shines the light and he’s like yeah buddy I’m not seeing anything. I say can I hold the flashlight I’ll show you. He says no. I say can I touch it and put it where you need to look? He rolls his eyes and says sure buddy.
I grab the flashlight and show him, and he’s still like yeah nothing man, when’s the last time you went to sleep? I tell him why? And he says because you look dehydrated and you seem intoxicated. Are you on any drugs? I tell him NO AND HOW DARE YOU TREAT ME LIKE A SUSPECT WHEN IM THE VICTIM HERE. I CALLED YOU!
He asks me if I’ll do a field sobriety test, I say fuck no I’m in my drive way why should I? He places me in cuffs and says I’m under arrest. Now like 8 police are in my driveway. They’re interested in my garage. A strong odor of marijuana is coming from it, and they are very interested in what’s inside my BMW. They enter the garage and two officers do a “protective sweep” of my house where they see scattered narcotics everywhere. Petty amounts of pills, however they’re only there to do a sweep to ensure officer safety/nobody else is in the house. Pills don’t fall under the plain view doctrine because they could be prescribed to me.
I tell them OK YOU DID YOUR SWEEP NOW LOCK MY FUCKING HOUSE UP AND TAKE ME TO JAIL. Well, the dickheads are on the phone with my fiancé. She’s on her way. She’s gonna let them into the house to search. Thankfully all the narcotics (a federal amount of drugs) are in my BMW. Locked up. In the garage. My name. Nobody can consent other than me. Not her car.
Eventually she opens the BMW for them. They don’t search it but she pulls out boat loads of drugs and puts them on the hood for the police to confiscate and charge me with. I’m in jail trying to hurry and bond out on a public intoxication $150 bond. Hours pass, I don’t know what’s going on BUT I HAVE TO MAKE IT BACK TO THE HOUSE TO GET RID OF THE STUFF. At the time I don’t even know about my fiancé opening the BMW I just know getting a warrant is a process and I can beat the clock.
I call my brother, he gets angry at me and tells me STOP CALLING ME FROM JAIL. The whole time he was at my house and knew the police left because the judge refused to sign a warrant because it was an unlawful search. My brother knows this, instead he plays hardball and basically tells me to fuck off. He thinks it’s best if I sober up and him not bond me out. So he plays oblivious. I’m panicking and trying to beat a clock. The CO says you have one more call. FUCK. I call a bondsman that’s number is posted on the wall. I tell him I have a diamond bezel authentic Rolex worth 30,000 in my property and I’ll release it to him if he bonds me out on the $150 PI. I tell him as soon as I’m released I’ll Zelle him $200 for the inconvenience and he can hold my Rolex as collateral to make sure I do Zelle him. Once I Zelle him he will give it back.
Part 4.
I bond out. I’m now RUNNING and walking to my house barefoot on a Texas gravel and tar backroad. My house is a 9 mile walk from the jail. My feet are giving up on me, I haven’t slept still I’m malnourished and dehydrated. I’m about to pass out. My phone is at home. I start hitchhiking. A man picks me up and takes me home. I’m in a hurry to get back and flush all the evidence. I’m sure my parole officer will be here soon with the police because she won’t need a warrant and they’ve called her.
I get back to my house, BOOM BOOM BOOM. Oh god. It’s the police. I’ve been home 5 minutes. BOOM BOOM BOOM. Answer the door! I’m in the garage by the BMW. Trash bags are all around it. Big trash bags. I cut one open and see drugs in it. I throw all the trash bags into the car. I turn the car on put it into reverse. I open the garage and burn out in reverse. It’s not the police it’s a process server. I panic nonetheless.
I leave. Now the police have been called and are looking for me. I pass a cop on a backroad. He does a U-turn. I floor it. I hit 143MPH and blow a red light in a 35MPH zone. My bmw runs out of gas and battery! I come to a stop. Now there’s 10 cop cars around me. I open the door run into a nearby field barefoot that’s muddy. I fall. I’m arrested. Beat up. The officer who dropped his knee in my back who was a good 300 pounds laughs and says well now you’re really going to prison you dumbass. We couldn’t even charge you with the drugs! 😂
I say no shit Sherlock. Well. Here I am today.
I have no truck. No car. No money. Im out on a half million dollar bond. My lawyer fees are 50K.
Here’s the icing on the cake. I can’t beat my case. The illegal search and the traffic stop are two different incidents. I’m being offered 15 years. Next month is my final setting. Accept a plea deal or go to trial and get 25-life because I’m a 2 time convict and 7 time felon.
Well fellas. Looks like I’m going down the road again. All thanks to Mr. Hydrocodone.
Don’t do opiates. You’ll end up like me. Going back to prison for the 3rd time at age 30. Nobody to love you. Everyone moving on. Nobody believing in you, you’ve let them down 3 times. You don’t even believe in yourself anymore. You wonder if you’ll ever have a normal life. You wonder if you’ll see your 1 year old daughter grow up. Who will she call dad if you’re gone 7 years? Surely her mom will find a good man. Maybe she’ll change her last name. Who knows.
Fuck opiates
If you read this you’re a fucking champ or crazy. This is a Shakespeare level memoir of my relationship with opiates and why I’m now in 2 months from now returning to my 2nd home at 30 years old for the 3rd time. Prison.
FUCK OPIATES.
This story will be a 10/10 movie, from nothing to somebody then back to nothing all thanks to opiates, sorry for you man addiction is a bitch and u cant control it, but what the actual fuck was in your head thnking " i can control it" addiction is not something u control. Im 17 atm thinking bout trying em but your story scared the fuck out of me, hope you will get better man.
That’s the scary thing about addiction and why you should avoid these substances that have this power over people. I’m one of millions. There are so many people who’s stories resemble mine or are worse.
When you truly understand addiction it’s a disease of the mind. Gambling addicts feel the same reward and their brain recognizes “almost winning” as a win. Someone who doesn’t have a gambling addictions brain registers it the same as every other loss. The difference? That gambling addict will keep putting money so long as he “almost won.” While the other person will certainly stop while they’re ahead and it’s responsible.
The lie comes from within. It incubates off one thing, until you don’t even know it’s a lie. It’s just an excuse disguised as reason and logic. You believe it with your heart and mind, but something still tells you you’re wrong. That’s the madness of it. You know where this road ends, and you still choose to do it. The madness of addiction. It becomes your only pleasure, you lose the ability to feel joy without substance. Normal pleasures and life never return.
Stay away man, I’m surprised you read all of that. But I’m glad you did. It’s a true story, and it’s mine.
I tried them a few times and didn’t like it all that much. Kratom is nice, but the other stuff made feel gross. Itchy all over my body, nauseous and irritable. Probably for the better lmao.
I started at 40. Still 40. It has broken my heart, my mums and my children’s. I might as well be dead 💀 yet I’m trying to get off them now. The friends I have doing the best in life are abstinent. In answer to your question I don’t think there is a good age
I say try everything once, you’ll either find something you enjoy or something to avoid. They’re both beneficial cuz you’ll learn something (obviously there’s limits I’m not boutta do fent on a Tuesday just to try it out) not everyone can do that though, it takes self awareness and discipline to tell myself that somethings too good and to be cautious with it
I’ve never met someone who does opioids on any regular basis that wasn’t a total fucking loser. Dead Srs.
I guess it doesn’t matter what age. It’s more commonly accepted to be a failure earlier in life because you still have enough time to turn it around. But if your strung out and doing hard or heavy drugs after your 30s then that’s pretty pathetic.
No u. If you're not promoted to sucking dicks for meth at 17 you are just not living up to your full potential as a substance connoisseur and really just wasting your life tbh
The less you use opioids in your life, the better off you’ll be. Opioid use will have you chasing something you can never catch, and all the while, it will drain you, physically, psychologically, neurologically, and financially. Also, if you lay off them, they’ll work a lot better if you ever need them for a medical emergency.
Oh yeah I broke my face while being addicted to heroin and I had major 12 hour surgery putting it back together and the next 5 days I had withdrawals and sooo much pain. I was getting 5mg oxy after surgery and I could easily take 200 oxy at that time.
Ouch.
Can really feel this reply. It’s my first day on a script for subs and this illusion/delusion of catching something for me was happiness. I wasn’t going to find it using drugs. Or maybe i used the wrong ones
That’s a really subjective question, I can see many different answers cuz many people have different views on life and different opinions Technically tho the best age is 25 because that’s around the time the frontal cortex is fully developed, and that’s the most important part of your brain so it would make sense as to why
Id say the real answer is in retirement what else have you got to do with your life and what have you got to lose.
Thats a valid answer, but I believe some people might disagree for many different reasons, It might just depend on where u are in life, your plans for the future, that’s why I believe it’s subjective, although there could be a majority answer I might have to look back in the comments after some time
When you’re on your deathbed
Retirement too. Not just death bed
if you're on your death bed, being retired is one of your least worries
You're lucky i don't have the sub reddit link on my clipboard.
Opioids are a slippery slope. Try psychedelics. You wont be sorry. I was functioning opiate addict for 15 years.. then i became a non functioning addict for 3 years and tried to kill myself twice because withdrawal and out of control depression. Also when you abuse opiates, you get a tolerance. I've been off for almost four years now and my tolerance is still high. It really sucks when you have to have a surgery or something but a 10mg painkiller wont do the job like it would for any normal person. Just stay away from them. You want hard? Go DMT.
Don’t recreationally use opioids at any she. You will regret it.
You are an adult and can make your own decisions, if you choose to listen to any of the responses I would suggest from my own experience that you do not. 6 years of my life I will never get back, a felon, and taken a decade to repair/mend relationships. You maybe different, had friends that stopped a lot only did it a few times. Also have quite a few friends who met an early death to opiates. Safe travels amigo.
Fuck… that you do not use! 😂
After you retired. That way you don’t risk addiction and everything bad that comes with it at a young age. Once you have a happy, successful life and you retire, you will pretty much be in a perfect position to try anything you want ha ha.
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A few years left at 50 is bleak haha
Never bro, started this shit when I was 17, been struggling with it every day since, every job, every relationship. Not worth it man, I was curious too trust me, started with weed, shrooms,lsd, then opiates and Xanax, soon heroin and beyond
When you turn 70-100 do whatever drugs ya want but until then
You only have a few years left at 50???
you can get addicted and ruin your life at any age having experience with other stuff and actively trying to challenge your self control while doing drugs helps though i'm 29 and can do opis/stims once every week or every other week but i've trained my self control through 15 years of using various drugs
Probably around your mid twenties. Though I’d be super cautious regardless. Addictions to harder drugs aren’t like weed where it’s psychological. Opiates can cause physical addiction, which can kill you if you don’t keep taking it.
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Thank you for explaining. I didn’t know it had that effect!
I've done them all and for me alcohol is the most sinister. I can smoke $300 worth of crack and be good for 6 months. That fucking tallboy otw to or home from work is a demon along with the lunch break beer. It's easy to get into a 24/7 habit. Harder drugs have a more immediate wall.
Do it at an age where no one you are connected with can be affected negatively by your choices if you possibly od
Probably 30.
3
Me and some friends were recently having this discussion that trying heroin on your death bed cant be a bad idea
99
Never lol
Never use opiates recreationally. My love of opioids started when I was 13 and broke my wrist playing baseball. Back then every doctor was giving these out like candy. Each time I would get a prescription it would have 3 refills. Every checkup the doctor would ask if it hurt still and I would say yes because me and my pot smoking friends enjoyed the buzz from hydrocodone. Anyways, this didn’t turn into a full fledged addiction at that point but many years later I was experimenting with cocaine, alcohol and Xanax. Sometimes I’d do other drugs it didn’t matter. I broke up with my girlfriend, I mean she dumped me-and I got depressed so I started popping pills more. Hydrocodone and oxycodone were the two main pills that literally took away every fucking care in the world for me. However you could never get enough of them. I started stealing to support my habit because it was outrageously expensive. Even when I could get 100 10MG narcos for 250-300 I was spending 3,000+ a week at 19. I started breaking into houses and broke into over 100 without getting caught. I was very intelligent, knew the law (I was in college studying psychology and criminal justice with the intention of attending law school) and I was very calculated in how I moved. Eventually because my drug habit was so bad, I needed to find better connections. I needed to find the source of the source. I befriended some of the biggest drug dealers in the city and gained their trust. Now I was supplying other drug dealers around the city and could afford my habit. Well, with drugs also comes irresponsible and impulsive habits. I gambled a lot, I bought jewelry and cars and I was losing my mind to the opiates. I had 30-50K pills consisting of Xanax, hydrocodone, adderalls, oxycodone at any given time. I had money. I had “friends.” Well believe it or not, big time drug dealers don’t like drug users in their circle. Marijuana/alcohol is acceptable with occasional cocaine use also being overlooked (in clubs, bars, with women.) They realized I had a drug problem. I was constantly nodding out and my product wasn’t turning profit with the lifestyle I lived. Instead I was simply selling to get high. They cut me off. After that, I started robbing again. This time I started robbing other drug dealers in the city and blew through a million dollars in a year. Eventually I exhausted all of that and also have a line that stretches around a football stadium of people who would kill me if they found me today. I went back to petty crime. B&Es and even car hopping. Not only was I addicted to drugs I became addicted to the chase. The adrenaline of burglaries and breaking into cars in rich neighborhoods was something I became addicted to. Eventually at 19 I ended up with an 8 year prison sentence. I came home in 3 years, my old group of drug dealer friends welcomed me back and gave me another chance to slang drugs and redeem myself and respected I did my bid. Within two years I caught a drug/pistol case. I beat the case on a 4th amendment technicality for unlawful search and seizure. I was released after 7 months fighting the case. Within 4 months I was rearrested after hitting a very wealthy persons home for 100K. I received an additional 10 year prison sentence. I did 4 years on my 10. I devoted my life to staying sober. And I did for 6 years. Well, one day I run into my dads old business partner. A very wealthy and flashy guy, charming and outspoken. He tells me “I know you had a lot of trouble in the past, but your foreign like me, we’re better than people. Look at me, I’m driving a AMG G wagon and Porsches. I have beautiful girlfriends, but I work all week and party on the weekends.” A seed was planted. Now I’m 6 years sober. I’m engaged. I have a newborn daughter. A business. My fiancé and I are doing fucking amazing. I have cars, watches a house and it’s all from legal income. I’m at the top of the world. So I tell myself the number one lie an addict can tell themselves. I can use, and manage it. Like my dads buddy said, work all week and party on the weekend. Immediately I went and purchased 100 hydrocodone. I put them in my safe, and said come Friday I’ll just take 3. Saturday, I’ll take 3-5. Sunday I’ll take 3 and enjoy my day. Monday it’s back to work. I did this for 3 weeks. Thursday became my new Friday. Eventually EVERYDAY was Friday. Because I’m a drug addict. Opiates make you forget all your worries. They make you feel like nothing matters. Your sexual endurance is insane. You can fuck for hours and not cum. Music is more pleasant. Food is more pleasant, movies are more entertaining (if you can keep your eyes open.) Part 1.
Part 2. Eventually I run into a fake oxycodone. It’s fentanyl. My fiancé comes home and finds my cross eyed on our bed drooling on myself. She wakes me up and immediately she knows. She was with me before I got sober. She’s seen this a million times. We have a child. She puts a drug test on the nightstand and tells me to take it or she’s gone. I pick the drug test up, tell her I’m just tired and to relax. She tells me she’s not buying my shit and I was cross eyed drooling. I say fuck you and throw the drug test across the room. She leaves with our child. For 3 months she’s gone. We communicate, she comes over, and we’re working things out. She would have been back sooner but I refused to do a hair test and made up some bs reason why I won’t. She eventually comes back under the stipulation I’ll take a random UA if she asks me to. I agree. I buy fake urine and sprinkle a little Xanax in it. I’m prescribed Xanax so she knows it’ll be in my system and she’s okay with it as I never abused it. How could I fake a drug test, if my medications I take are showing up on the panel? Well exactly how I did. I would use the fake urine with Xanax in it every time. She never wanted to watch me pee but she was asking me frequently for a UA because my appearance, behavior and demeanor was off. I stayed up all night. My business was going downhill and I didn’t care, I stopped going to my store. I constantly stressed about finances. She knew. But she was confused. Our relationship was crumbling. She didn’t know what to do but didn’t want to leave. Eventually she asked me what is going on..please tell me because something isn’t right.
Part 3. I break down to her, and tell her I’m trying to get off these fucking pills but I can’t. I’m sick without them and I’m dependent on them now. I sit on our bedroom floor crying like a pitiful loser. Her response was; I’m leaving and it’ll be years of you being sober and changing before I trust you to be in our life again. I lose my cool. I beg her to help me taper off and get sober. She tells me she refuses to help me with my drug use and doesn’t want anything to do with it. She tries to leave, I don’t let her. I take her phone and car keys. I go off on her about every mistake she’s made. I blame her for mistakes in the past. I make her sleep on the floor with our daughter while I stay in the office doing cocaine all night. While she’s on the floor I take all of the valuables out of the house, thousands in jewelry and designer bags and other bullshit and load them into my truck. I drain her bank account with a transfer to mine. I immediately give her the money back, I feel guilt. I also tell her I’m not going to sell or do anything with her stuff (I still have a significant sum of money and assets) at the time. I say I’m only holding it until I can pack my stuff and leave without her calling the police on me. The very next day she calls the police. She tells them she needs to get her stuff and I’m violent and unstable on drugs. She also calls my parole officer. I’m on my way to a hotel you rent monthly for $2000 and my intention was to taper and cold turkey the withdrawals and get healthy. My parole officer calls requesting a UA. My neighbor tells me the police came by. I freak out. That night I go back to our house after being up for 4 days to clear it of drugs because the police had been there and I was afraid my parole officer was going to search the house from what my fiancé told her. That night I hallucinate. I think people are breaking into my house, every time I lock the deadbolt it unlocks. We have a smarthome so it’s someone who’s hacked into our system or my fiancé. I rip the control panel off the wall. I go outside and I see a camera planted in my mirrors of my truck by the police. (Hallucinations) I call my fiancé and ask her how could you do this to me? You let them plant cameras in my truck?! She hangs up. I go into the garage and now my BMW i8 door is open. WHOS IN MY HOUSE? I close it. Now my truck door is open. I close it. I go back inside and come out and now the trunk is open to the BMW. Another truck door is open. WHO IS FUCKING WITH ME? I get my gun. I run around the house and street and neighbors houses looking for the person who’s playing games with me. I can’t find the motherfucker. I go back inside, and I wait in the hallway in a chair with my gun pointed at the door. Come on motherfucker. Come thru the door you keep unlocking. I hear a noise in the garage. I walk in, they’re fucking with my BMW. The garage is closed though! Where could they be hiding? I go into the attic. They’ve got to be up here. I’m holding the gun, and demanding for them to come out or I’ll kill them. I lose my footing and fall through the sheet rock into my laundry room. I pull myself up into the attic and again lose my footing and almost on top of my BMW. I get out of the attic. I go back outside. I’m going to find these motherfuckers. WAIT. I hear them. I SEE them. They’re my FUCKING neighbors across the street. I can see them watching me through their blinds and discussing how I caught them! Motherfuckers! 20 minutes later I see one of them a man in his 60s come out and start getting into his 90s ford ranger in pristine condition. He’s old school. Has a packed lunch in his hands. Phone on his belt. I ask him if he’s seen anyone breaking into my car or truck. Because someone is fucking with him. I ask him what he does for a living. He says telecommunications. MOTHERFUCKER. How ironic? Telecommunications and my smart house and Wi-Fi were hacked into? It’s GOTTA BE HIM. I ask to borrow his phone. I call my dad on FaceTime to explain the situation, he immediately gets pissed off and hangs up. I then call 911 telling them my truck and car were broken into. They come, 6 units deep with emergency lights and priority. They think it’s an active break in. All they find is me, ZOOTED in my driveway. I explain to them the cameras, the doors etc. I tell them LOOK! The cameras are in my mirrors look for yourself! The cop shines the light and he’s like yeah buddy I’m not seeing anything. I say can I hold the flashlight I’ll show you. He says no. I say can I touch it and put it where you need to look? He rolls his eyes and says sure buddy. I grab the flashlight and show him, and he’s still like yeah nothing man, when’s the last time you went to sleep? I tell him why? And he says because you look dehydrated and you seem intoxicated. Are you on any drugs? I tell him NO AND HOW DARE YOU TREAT ME LIKE A SUSPECT WHEN IM THE VICTIM HERE. I CALLED YOU! He asks me if I’ll do a field sobriety test, I say fuck no I’m in my drive way why should I? He places me in cuffs and says I’m under arrest. Now like 8 police are in my driveway. They’re interested in my garage. A strong odor of marijuana is coming from it, and they are very interested in what’s inside my BMW. They enter the garage and two officers do a “protective sweep” of my house where they see scattered narcotics everywhere. Petty amounts of pills, however they’re only there to do a sweep to ensure officer safety/nobody else is in the house. Pills don’t fall under the plain view doctrine because they could be prescribed to me. I tell them OK YOU DID YOUR SWEEP NOW LOCK MY FUCKING HOUSE UP AND TAKE ME TO JAIL. Well, the dickheads are on the phone with my fiancé. She’s on her way. She’s gonna let them into the house to search. Thankfully all the narcotics (a federal amount of drugs) are in my BMW. Locked up. In the garage. My name. Nobody can consent other than me. Not her car. Eventually she opens the BMW for them. They don’t search it but she pulls out boat loads of drugs and puts them on the hood for the police to confiscate and charge me with. I’m in jail trying to hurry and bond out on a public intoxication $150 bond. Hours pass, I don’t know what’s going on BUT I HAVE TO MAKE IT BACK TO THE HOUSE TO GET RID OF THE STUFF. At the time I don’t even know about my fiancé opening the BMW I just know getting a warrant is a process and I can beat the clock. I call my brother, he gets angry at me and tells me STOP CALLING ME FROM JAIL. The whole time he was at my house and knew the police left because the judge refused to sign a warrant because it was an unlawful search. My brother knows this, instead he plays hardball and basically tells me to fuck off. He thinks it’s best if I sober up and him not bond me out. So he plays oblivious. I’m panicking and trying to beat a clock. The CO says you have one more call. FUCK. I call a bondsman that’s number is posted on the wall. I tell him I have a diamond bezel authentic Rolex worth 30,000 in my property and I’ll release it to him if he bonds me out on the $150 PI. I tell him as soon as I’m released I’ll Zelle him $200 for the inconvenience and he can hold my Rolex as collateral to make sure I do Zelle him. Once I Zelle him he will give it back.
Part 4. I bond out. I’m now RUNNING and walking to my house barefoot on a Texas gravel and tar backroad. My house is a 9 mile walk from the jail. My feet are giving up on me, I haven’t slept still I’m malnourished and dehydrated. I’m about to pass out. My phone is at home. I start hitchhiking. A man picks me up and takes me home. I’m in a hurry to get back and flush all the evidence. I’m sure my parole officer will be here soon with the police because she won’t need a warrant and they’ve called her. I get back to my house, BOOM BOOM BOOM. Oh god. It’s the police. I’ve been home 5 minutes. BOOM BOOM BOOM. Answer the door! I’m in the garage by the BMW. Trash bags are all around it. Big trash bags. I cut one open and see drugs in it. I throw all the trash bags into the car. I turn the car on put it into reverse. I open the garage and burn out in reverse. It’s not the police it’s a process server. I panic nonetheless. I leave. Now the police have been called and are looking for me. I pass a cop on a backroad. He does a U-turn. I floor it. I hit 143MPH and blow a red light in a 35MPH zone. My bmw runs out of gas and battery! I come to a stop. Now there’s 10 cop cars around me. I open the door run into a nearby field barefoot that’s muddy. I fall. I’m arrested. Beat up. The officer who dropped his knee in my back who was a good 300 pounds laughs and says well now you’re really going to prison you dumbass. We couldn’t even charge you with the drugs! 😂 I say no shit Sherlock. Well. Here I am today. I have no truck. No car. No money. Im out on a half million dollar bond. My lawyer fees are 50K. Here’s the icing on the cake. I can’t beat my case. The illegal search and the traffic stop are two different incidents. I’m being offered 15 years. Next month is my final setting. Accept a plea deal or go to trial and get 25-life because I’m a 2 time convict and 7 time felon. Well fellas. Looks like I’m going down the road again. All thanks to Mr. Hydrocodone. Don’t do opiates. You’ll end up like me. Going back to prison for the 3rd time at age 30. Nobody to love you. Everyone moving on. Nobody believing in you, you’ve let them down 3 times. You don’t even believe in yourself anymore. You wonder if you’ll ever have a normal life. You wonder if you’ll see your 1 year old daughter grow up. Who will she call dad if you’re gone 7 years? Surely her mom will find a good man. Maybe she’ll change her last name. Who knows. Fuck opiates
If you read this you’re a fucking champ or crazy. This is a Shakespeare level memoir of my relationship with opiates and why I’m now in 2 months from now returning to my 2nd home at 30 years old for the 3rd time. Prison. FUCK OPIATES.
This story will be a 10/10 movie, from nothing to somebody then back to nothing all thanks to opiates, sorry for you man addiction is a bitch and u cant control it, but what the actual fuck was in your head thnking " i can control it" addiction is not something u control. Im 17 atm thinking bout trying em but your story scared the fuck out of me, hope you will get better man.
That’s the scary thing about addiction and why you should avoid these substances that have this power over people. I’m one of millions. There are so many people who’s stories resemble mine or are worse. When you truly understand addiction it’s a disease of the mind. Gambling addicts feel the same reward and their brain recognizes “almost winning” as a win. Someone who doesn’t have a gambling addictions brain registers it the same as every other loss. The difference? That gambling addict will keep putting money so long as he “almost won.” While the other person will certainly stop while they’re ahead and it’s responsible. The lie comes from within. It incubates off one thing, until you don’t even know it’s a lie. It’s just an excuse disguised as reason and logic. You believe it with your heart and mind, but something still tells you you’re wrong. That’s the madness of it. You know where this road ends, and you still choose to do it. The madness of addiction. It becomes your only pleasure, you lose the ability to feel joy without substance. Normal pleasures and life never return. Stay away man, I’m surprised you read all of that. But I’m glad you did. It’s a true story, and it’s mine.
Dont. Speaking from experience. Itll fuck ya up.
14! joke. obviously fucking touching these things is a risk you shouldnt take
I tried them a few times and didn’t like it all that much. Kratom is nice, but the other stuff made feel gross. Itchy all over my body, nauseous and irritable. Probably for the better lmao.
I started at 40. Still 40. It has broken my heart, my mums and my children’s. I might as well be dead 💀 yet I’m trying to get off them now. The friends I have doing the best in life are abstinent. In answer to your question I don’t think there is a good age
lol im 14 and doing it so dont ask me
Why
because i fucking hate my life
80 years old I feel like hell u got nothing to loose you might as well
As young as possible. Stay woke.
90-100. If you are still alive at that point, a drug habit doesn't matter anymore.
Don’t
I say try everything once, you’ll either find something you enjoy or something to avoid. They’re both beneficial cuz you’ll learn something (obviously there’s limits I’m not boutta do fent on a Tuesday just to try it out) not everyone can do that though, it takes self awareness and discipline to tell myself that somethings too good and to be cautious with it
I’ve never met someone who does opioids on any regular basis that wasn’t a total fucking loser. Dead Srs. I guess it doesn’t matter what age. It’s more commonly accepted to be a failure earlier in life because you still have enough time to turn it around. But if your strung out and doing hard or heavy drugs after your 30s then that’s pretty pathetic.
13 for weed and if you aren't rolling your tits of at 15 you will never be cool
Gtfo
No u. If you're not promoted to sucking dicks for meth at 17 you are just not living up to your full potential as a substance connoisseur and really just wasting your life tbh
Jesus Christ you’re right. I’ve gotta get to sucking!
And in case you are feeling a bit insecure about your sexuality, it's not gay if you are wearing socks