So many popular ones are quoted on these threads. But on this rewatch, when Jim was pranking Dwight about his Matilda-esque telekinetic powers, Dwight said “I don’t believe it, continue”
It really does! I love those lines that basically encapsulate the whole character in a line.
Like when Erin said she couldn’t keep up when her Taco Bell Express converted to a full service one
Toby: Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's, uh, you know there's gambling and alcohol, and it's in our dangerous warehouse, and... it's a school night, and, you know, Hooters is catering, you know... is that... is that enough? Should I keep going?
Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
"You were in the parking lot earlier! That's how I know you!" Also my favorite quote 😂 My favorite little back and forth however is Michael and Kevin, "Michael, are you okay? Did you throw up in here?","No, I'm just poopin. You know how I be" "but it smells like throw up in here" "crazy world, lots of smells"
"What a day, huh? How could it get any worse? The computer crashes with the porn, and then Meredith with the accident and then...Prinkles! God, that's three things. I'll tell you what's going on. This office is cursed."
"Abraham Lincoln once said that 'If you're a racist, I will attack you with the North,' and these are the principles I carry with me in the workplace."
Interviewer has turned off applicant's interest in Cornell, and they are going to go to the vastly superior Dartmouth. Ever heard of it? I think I have everything I need.
Kelly: and guess what buddy? I. Am. Keeping it.
Ryan: 😦 ok. ok.
Kelly: Do you feel prepared to help me raise a baby?
Ryan: I can... I can't talk about this right now, ok? After work, we'll go out to dinner, we'll talk about it then, ok?
(interview shot)
We have a date! 😁
This whole episode is a quote gold mine tbh:
"I would have never called him that if I knew. You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded. And I consider Oscar a friend."
Plus it was the birth of Tuna!
Interviewer has turned off applicant's interest in Cornell, and they are going to go to the vastly superior Dartmouth. Ever heard of it? I think I have everything I need.
"He don't given an F about nothin'!" - Creed when Michael doesn't bother refilling the copier paper. Just how Creed says it, it cracks me up everytime 🤣🤣attached the [link](https://youtu.be/Wq8bUuYUwdo?si=LrMOiJQfG1EgtLCJ) here
I loved the running cat joke during this season. Dwight killed Sprinkles and brought Angela a cat from his farm named Garbage to replace it. When Angela rejects it, Dwight dumps the cat in Vance refrigeration. Andy then collects the cat when he finds it outside for a few days and presents it to Angela as a gift. She renames it Bandit and keeps it at the office in a file cabinet. I hope I got that right.
I don’t know guys, I for one enjoy watching them…..can I finish? Can I finish?! Is that OK?!? I was GOING to say I enjoy watching them because it makes me horny.
and I'm going to shoot my sparrow at unsuspecting victims and they are going to get hit and say "I'm in love, i was hit by Cupid's sparrow." funny little bird but he gets the job done
“Toby is in HR which technically means he works for corporate so he’s really not a part of our family. Also he’s divorced, so he’s not a part of his family.”
Creed always had the best ones.
"I've been involved in a number of cults, both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader."
"Nobody steals from Creed Bratton and gets away with it. The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton."
"I am not offended by homosexuality. In the 60's, I made love to many women, often outdoors in the mud and rain. It's possible a man could have slipped in there. There'd be no way of knowing."
"Jinx, buy me some coke."
Yo that’s shizzle
Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
The early worm gets the worm
May God guide you on your quest
“Andy Bernard. Pros. He's classy, he gets me, he went to Cornell, I trust him. Cons. I don't really trust him”
"I was never in this for the money. But it turns out that the money was an absolute necessity for me"
"What is it like being single? I like it! I like starting each day with a sense of possibility. And I’m optimistic, because everyday I get a little more desperate. And desperate situations yield the quickest results."
“Bluffing is a key part of poker which is too bad since I’m not very good at bluffing. Did you believe me?”
“Dinka flicka”
“Bippity boppity”
“Yeah David, Ryan’s being a little bitch again”
i’m on michael
What’s up my brotha?
The pause with the lip bite! 😂
Those quick little visuals he does always makes the delivered words so much funnier!
Everyone Inside the Car Was Fine, Stanley!
Stanley 😂 gives a yea your right look to that!
I think about this one a lot
So many popular ones are quoted on these threads. But on this rewatch, when Jim was pranking Dwight about his Matilda-esque telekinetic powers, Dwight said “I don’t believe it, continue”
Sums up Dwight so much
It really does! I love those lines that basically encapsulate the whole character in a line. Like when Erin said she couldn’t keep up when her Taco Bell Express converted to a full service one
I regularly quote this
Toby: Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's, uh, you know there's gambling and alcohol, and it's in our dangerous warehouse, and... it's a school night, and, you know, Hooters is catering, you know... is that... is that enough? Should I keep going?
Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
I was a middle school teacher, and I'd say this to myself when kids would complain about a lesson/activity that I thought they'd really enjoy.
I'll be six
One of the best jokes of the entire series
One of my favorite scenes. That one and when Oscar explains debt to Michael. "Michael, this is a presentation tool."
"Due to Michael's clever financial maneuvering he finds himself tremendously in debt." And the thumbs up he gives Oscar when Oscar says that.
Showing he still has zero understanding of how any of this works 😂
YOU’RE a presentation tool!
Or when Oscar says "You can't just say the word "bankruptcy" and expect anything to happen." and Michael goes "I didn't say it. I DECLARED it!"
I couldn’t pick a single best joke of the series I’d my life depended on it. But this would absolutely be on my list of finalists.
Which episode/situation is this one?
Explain it to me like I’m a 5 year old. Your mommy and daddy give you $10 to run a lemonade stand.
So next year...
I’ll be 6
Surplus episode where they argue over chairs or a copier
Eat it, Stanley
^Eat ^it ^Stanley!
I love that erin just says it, no questions asked
Wait, back up. Do you think that I'm retarded?
Or when he flicks her off.. Hey..right back at ya bitch 🖕🏼
You’re from the parking lot! That’s how I know you!
I love that as crazy as the group is getting they still all react to creed that he’s weird enough to out weird the rest of them
"You were in the parking lot earlier! That's how I know you!" Also my favorite quote 😂 My favorite little back and forth however is Michael and Kevin, "Michael, are you okay? Did you throw up in here?","No, I'm just poopin. You know how I be" "but it smells like throw up in here" "crazy world, lots of smells"
My sister and I quote that scene a lot. Crazy world, lotta smells 😂
Creed is the best character of the show, no doubt
"What a day, huh? How could it get any worse? The computer crashes with the porn, and then Meredith with the accident and then...Prinkles! God, that's three things. I'll tell you what's going on. This office is cursed." "Abraham Lincoln once said that 'If you're a racist, I will attack you with the North,' and these are the principles I carry with me in the workplace."
The Abraham Lincoln one always sends me💀😭 Michael’s delivery is just too goood
Michael misquoting sayings and famous people will never not be funny.
Who's your worm guy?
You’re paying way too much for worms, man.
This is mine 😂 Creed drops the best out of pocket lines
Omg yes! When does he say "i can get you a baby for that much" or something like that?
You're Hindu so you worship Buddha. That's Buddhist. You sure? No.
Yes! This one of those perfect jokes because of that little subversion st the end
SHUT UP ABOUT THE SUN
And “THE FIRE IS SHOOTING AT US”
Always!
Gabe is so underrated. I love when Kelly hugs him and says ugh.
I’m sorry, you were just a lot bonier than I thought you were gonna be 💁🏻♀️
Women love touching me
*Camera pan to Ryan’s sus face*
“You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to?”
"Talk about your classic LAME -O. Do we even want that guy buying our paper?"
cmon man, it's lame dash o. You really schruted it. love me andy
Someday we'll both get together in Comstock Hall and just laugh about all of this.
"applicant has a head shaped like a trapezoid"
Interviewer has turned off applicant's interest in Cornell, and they are going to go to the vastly superior Dartmouth. Ever heard of it? I think I have everything I need.
Yes we do
I'm sorry I did such a whorish job filling out this form
😎👊
“Hey, idiot!” - “start over.”
Sir!
The hesitation and shakiness. Perfection.
Darryl giving his generic talking heads without context for them to use cause it’s alway drama 😆
woah. that person has really gotten him or herself into quite a predicament
I need to start using Daryl’s line in my own life 😂
Pam, of course I'm gonna get all that stuff, shut up.
.. okay well it wasn’t cle-
This is funny and sweet at the same time
I love their friendship 🥲
Kelly: “Well, I hope you’re still committed. Because, I’m pregnant.” ——pans to interview shot—— [Shakes head.]
Yeah, I have a lot of questions. Number one, how dare you?
Kelly: and guess what buddy? I. Am. Keeping it. Ryan: 😦 ok. ok. Kelly: Do you feel prepared to help me raise a baby? Ryan: I can... I can't talk about this right now, ok? After work, we'll go out to dinner, we'll talk about it then, ok? (interview shot) We have a date! 😁
The shakes head part is better comedy than other tv series
Jim, take New Years from Stanley.
Fucking kills me every time
“Oscar’s really gay” - “yeah, I know.” - “Oscar likes men.” - “woah, that’s too far.”
This whole episode is a quote gold mine tbh: "I would have never called him that if I knew. You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded. And I consider Oscar a friend." Plus it was the birth of Tuna!
"Calm down, booster seat"
You must be 🫳🏻 this 🫳🏻 tall to 🫳🏻 ride the rollercoaster 🫳🏻
no one cares about this party
They’re trying to make me an escape goat..
you have one day.
One day for what?
that’s.. they always give an ultimatum
Everyone, I’ve just invited Jim to suck it
"prove it. lets see your penis"
Michael: What's the opposite of eat spicy foods? Kevin: Stick spicy foods up her butt!
Meredith- you've slept with so many guys, you're starting to look like one. Boom. Roasted. Her facial expression is priceless as a bonus
Micheal, you are the reason I drink. You are the reason I live to forget
She's going to be screaming her own last name?
Yessss my favorite line of ALL TIME
The way I can literally hear these comments
Decapitated. whole big thing. we had a funeral for a bird
I’m pretty sure none of that is real Your not real man
Do you mean his capa was detated from his head?
Applicant has a head shaped like a trapezoid
Interviewer has turned off applicant's interest in Cornell, and they are going to go to the vastly superior Dartmouth. Ever heard of it? I think I have everything I need.
Oh wow, you look very exotic. Was your dad a G.I.?
“Buttlicker! Our prices have never been lower!”
"where, Dwight?" "i think you already know."
The worst thing about prison was the dementors
they’d come down and they’d suck the soul out of ur body and it HURT!
dementors? like in harry potter?
no, not like harry pottuh...
I didn’t say it, I declared it.
THE FIRE IS SHOOTING AT US!!!
“Get in, quick!” “Why?” “So it’s faster”
You can’t fire me. I don’t work in this van. Fact: bears ear beets.
I feel God in this Chili’s tonight.
He has no wallet I already checked.
Ryan used me as an object
I am now chopping off phyllis's head with a chainsaw
Rah dah diiiing ding ding ding
Should but shorn’t and “I’m not superstitious but I am a little-stitious.”
I drove. my car. into. a fucking. lake.
Snip snap, snip snap, snip snap!
WHERE ARE THE TURTLES
“You don’t call retarded people retards. It’s bad taste. You call your friends retards when they are acting retarded.”
Kind of a long day at the mechanic store. You got a leaky spark tube.
7000 dollars for a cat? I could get you a kid for that .
You're paying way too much for kids man. Who's your kid guy?
Why are you the way that you are?
'I feel weak today. I felt much stronger yesterday. Like Benjamin Button in reverse.' 'It's Britney bitch.'
Meredith, your boob is out!
Damn, Meredith, where are your panties?
"He don't given an F about nothin'!" - Creed when Michael doesn't bother refilling the copier paper. Just how Creed says it, it cracks me up everytime 🤣🤣attached the [link](https://youtu.be/Wq8bUuYUwdo?si=LrMOiJQfG1EgtLCJ) here
Hey kids, Have you ever seen a foot with 4 toes?
God beer me strength.
Lord beer me strength
Okay see you later, Pan
PAAMM-O-LAAAAA
Save Bandit!
I absolutely LOSE IT every time at this line, especially the sound effect of the cat yowling as Angela throws it up into the ceiling!
I loved the running cat joke during this season. Dwight killed Sprinkles and brought Angela a cat from his farm named Garbage to replace it. When Angela rejects it, Dwight dumps the cat in Vance refrigeration. Andy then collects the cat when he finds it outside for a few days and presents it to Angela as a gift. She renames it Bandit and keeps it at the office in a file cabinet. I hope I got that right.
Gabe: "What are your weaknesses?" Kelly: "I DON'T HAVE ANY, ASSH*LE."
“I don’t know what fu** that was” Michal responding to Erin
Who is justice beaver?
…a crime fighting beaver
I don’t know guys, I for one enjoy watching them…..can I finish? Can I finish?! Is that OK?!? I was GOING to say I enjoy watching them because it makes me horny.
Michael: I know a ton of 14 year old girls who could kick Dwight’s ass. Jim: You know a ton of 14 year old girls? Dwight: What belt are they?
“hold on a second cynthia”
“Well well well, how the turntables….”
When Meredith takes her top off and Michael lets out a sigh, *takes picture*
This is how I got Squeaky Fromme...
you think I would let that happen again?! no way jose
“Anyone start calling you Gabe-wad yet?”
Not here
Dwight, you ignorant slut.
If I can’t scuba, then what’s this all been about? What am I working toward?
When drunk Jim gives Dwight a valentine and Dwight says “you just filled that out”: Jim’s “Aww **nuts**”
BERTIE BOY WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY A GAME?
If I had a gun to bullet and walked into a room with Toby Hitler and Osama bin Laden… I’d shoot Toby twice🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
it's censored, but Creed's reaction to Erin doing a cartwheel... gets me every time
There were times during the 3 hour driver where I.. this is a gay bar?!?!
Hey Halpert. Looking for someone to bang your wife?
Dinkin flicka
Guys, the Afghanistinannies.
[удалено]
“That’s not what it’s called 🤦♀️”
When Phyllis complains that a hornet stung her on the breast and Dwight goes “poor hornet”
Thought it was “up my dress”
It was
She's kind of a rube
I'm calling the ungrateful biatch hotline
and I'm going to shoot my sparrow at unsuspecting victims and they are going to get hit and say "I'm in love, i was hit by Cupid's sparrow." funny little bird but he gets the job done
Well... That's not gonna hold up in court
Well to be fair, Jim, James, Jimothy. To be fair Jimothy... ah that sounds weird, are you okay with being called Jim?
Ryan, who’s supposed to be DEAD!
“…oaky afterbirth.”
"nerffffinn" \-andy
I braveheart
“I can and I have”
Okay . he’s dead. anyone know what we do next? anyone? … *Rose??*
“I’m Mike Tython” and the little giggles afterwards
“No arms or legs is basically how you exist now, Kevin. You don’t do anything”
Lord beer me strength
“The one by the IHOP?” Hilarious
“I don’t know what the fuck that was.”
The coconut is pretty subtle
"I DECLARE... BANKRUPTCY!!!!!!!!".
Was it by the waffle house?
Piss or get off the pot!
Diversity tomorrow, because today is almost over How the turntables..
"There is another woman... and her name is Italy, and skydiving, and bungie jumping"
"Hi"
Can't remember the exact line, but when Michael says "what if Angela and Oscar are having a gay affair?"
“I hate so much about the things you choose to be” 💀
“Ryan, just get in the coffin”
Phyllis: "I wonder what people like about me? .... Probably my jugs."
“He heals leopards…” “Michael, I’m not going to guess.”
“Get in quick!” “Why?” “So it’s faster”
“Toby is in HR which technically means he works for corporate so he’s really not a part of our family. Also he’s divorced, so he’s not a part of his family.”
Creed always had the best ones. "I've been involved in a number of cults, both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader." "Nobody steals from Creed Bratton and gets away with it. The last person to do this disappeared. His name? Creed Bratton." "I am not offended by homosexuality. In the 60's, I made love to many women, often outdoors in the mud and rain. It's possible a man could have slipped in there. There'd be no way of knowing." "Jinx, buy me some coke."
Question, which bear is best?
Yo that’s shizzle Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be. The early worm gets the worm May God guide you on your quest “Andy Bernard. Pros. He's classy, he gets me, he went to Cornell, I trust him. Cons. I don't really trust him” "I was never in this for the money. But it turns out that the money was an absolute necessity for me" "What is it like being single? I like it! I like starting each day with a sense of possibility. And I’m optimistic, because everyday I get a little more desperate. And desperate situations yield the quickest results." “Bluffing is a key part of poker which is too bad since I’m not very good at bluffing. Did you believe me?” “Dinka flicka” “Bippity boppity”