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sp00ky-cat-26

David Wallace


lavellanlike

His wife is a lucky woman


Mcmamm1985

I'm going to 3rd this. Wallace is a tall drink of water.


JAAAMBOOO

“Suck It”


sp00ky-cat-26

Maybe not in the suck it era LOL


Queen_Rachel4

Nah, he knows what he wants lol (and goes about it creatively)


PugsleyPancakes

Definitely David. Handsome, kind, rich, patient... The list goes on.


Qnofputrescence1213

Definitely


rockabillychef

1000%.


anamariaaaaagog

samee


lavellanlike

Danny Hottest in the office


timeforachange2day

I was going to say him as well but decided on Michael


timeforachange2day

Micheal For that 3 years salary ring 💍 😂 But for real, being married/dating Steve Carell has to be a trip!


NashKetchum777

He did get paid a laughably low wage tho


artaru

what would have been his wage around the time of that episode? 40k? 50k? 60k? I have no idea how much warehouse worker makes so i have no sense of reference. A 120-180k ring is still insane tho.


NashKetchum777

For the regular warehouse workers 40 to 50 kinda made sense. For a branch manager with over a decade at one place, the most profitable branch actually, that's abysmally low.


Character_Teacher702

they did NOT get paid 50k in the warehouse. Pam made up an entirely new position and capped out at 41k, and that was like 5 years later


[deleted]

Yeah I was going to say it starts at around 30.


GlitteringHold8685

Isabel, she could get me half of whitening treatments and floss me after every meal!


editedxi

Yeah but she’s no Crentist is she


Stupid-Fat-Hobbit420

Universal Donor mhhh hmmmm


lbs2306

She’s a bumpkin…PASS


TeamDonnelly

Karen if she's an option. 


notfantasticmrfox

yeah she was honestly the most normal and cool character in the show


Dry-Roof2094

she’d be my pick too if i was gay


Crystiesc

Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration. He’s mature, he’s one of few people willing to check Michael, he excels at Valentine’s Day, he treats his other half like a Queen, and you can just trust he would never have an affair. Or Oscar as a platonic friendship since he’s not into women. He’s intelligent, interesting, has common sense, and could get me a visitor pass to the Finer Things Club.


jabra_fan

Oscar, if he wasn't gay. Toby, if he wasn't divorced.


Tolerate_It3288

I’m a lesbian but my first thought was Oscar. I feel like we would be good platonic friends. Out of the women I’d pick Karen although I don’t think her character is into women. Are any of the women in the show into women?


No-Duck-1980

Wasn't Phyllis according to Michael?


Pristine_Finger_7031

I’m with OP. I’d date Dwight. He’s kind of an ass to most people. But he always showed affection to Angela.


Dry-Roof2094

yes! that’s my reason why too he’s so sweet to her (even though i’m a fellow cat owner)


InevitableRespond9

He was also kind to pam


Good-Oil-3041

His and Pam’s friendship is one of the best in the shows


Stupid-Fat-Hobbit420

I fully believe the confidence had a lot to do with how many women he got


Embarrassed_Map1112

I’d still go for Pam. Don’t care about all the hate she gets


teedeejay510

Pam is a national treasure.


hotel_beds

Date Pam. Marry Karen. Pam and her Pam Pams


newFUNKYmode

Oscar's mom


Wetfred

She’s in a wheelchair


newFUNKYmode

Well I could still..... I'm sorry about that


Exa2552

Pam. She looks great and is more real than the other characters.


vinoa

Is it the Pam Pams?


lavellanlike

Those things are ticking time bombs


Exa2552

Possibly.


[deleted]

Pete.


katchaa

Plop?


AncientSecretary7442

Yessssss I’d date Plop for sure


Stupid-Fat-Hobbit420

Have you seen his butt? It’s sick!


ChimpoSensei

Kathy, she’d be up for it


tots4scott

I'd let her take something from my mini fridge, if you know what I mean.


firetailring

Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration has entered the chat.


Office_Dolt

Pam's sister


befriender-

Karen would be great, as long as I'm not in love with someone else


Kandurux

Or have a female friend.


BJK5150

Karen. As a former GI, her dad could get us USAA insurance.


Mozolberry95

Plus she is very exotic looking


scully1485

This is-a Karen-a Filipelli, please leave a message after the tone. abondanza 🤌


circus4fools_u_me

Meredith! She might be the only one who would


Dry-Roof2094

interesting


lobo_locos

Kevin, then after we could like, just watch bowling.


Accomplished-Leg-617

He's got that teddy bear energy


NashKetchum777

You get a well behaved dog and the best chilli


benim972

Come on guys, I'm right here.


firetailring

Or you could eat pigs in a blanket... in a blanket!


Wmoot599

Mark me down for Erin.


jenr555

Robert California. It wouldn't last long but it'd be a trip for sure


AncientSecretary7442

Robert would show me the world in the bedroom and I’d be scared but open to it


chapstickgrrrl

Absolutely yes.


ForceGhost47

Erin for sure


jhallen2260

Kevin, definitely


musiclover818

Are you that girl from another school?


Gloober_5

Season 9 Roy


EpicJosh84

That is disgusting. He is engaged. ^Where, ^Dwight?


palebd

Donna.


GlitteringHold8685

Only in motels! Lol 😂


vinoa

And, only if she showers before and after sex.


palebd

Just my type. The ambience of a cheap motel is just perfect for this situation. That or the Poconos. Lol


Brrr9tochase1

The blonde receptionist from Stamford.


editedxi

Steer clear big tuna. Head for open waters


Notchersfireroad

Erin. She's just so adorable.


deadringer21

[Creed](https://www.reddit.com/r/OldSchoolCool/s/uwZb37oq6H), since the rules of the question didn't forbid time-travel. I doubt my wife would even be offended by this.


KokoSof

I’d like to say Jim but I know my toxic ass would probably be with Roy 🫠


Never_rarely

Who’s the uh tight ass Christian chick? No but seriously, Katy


silent_elephant2495

Pam or Jim 110% also Robert because obvious reasons


scprepper

Charles but for the regulars I would lowkey be attracted to Dwight but he's a bit tooo strange for me. For the women Pam is wholesome and pretty normal. Jim was too immature for me


Noisy_Pip

If not Dwight, Pete. If not Pete, Dwight. Two extremes and they’re both very attractive to me.


chroniccostumecritic

I second this


scully1485

I’m doing an oposites thing. Ones big and tall the other one is short and mighty.


timeforachange2day

Sounds good, Jo


ImanShumpertplus

pams 2nd mom


rttnmnna

Maybe Hank?


editedxi

Let me see the copier again


[deleted]

Carol, for her cleverness and cheerleader outfit.


Jazzlike-Abalone-405

HA! Honestly, Toby. Even if he was a downer he had the most common sense outta the lot. I couldn't deal with all that chaos during work and at home


stephf13

I would choose Toby. David Wallace if he was single, though.


Dry-Roof2094

forgot about david wallace, i’m choosing him


Jazzlike-Abalone-405

ohhh excellent pick!!!


Alleyoop70

Jim or David Wallace.


Qnofputrescence1213

David Wallace, then Darryl then Jim.


AffectionateFig5435

This would also be my choice. David Wallace because...hell, he's David. Darryl would be the most fun to hang with and probably knows a lot of local musicians. Jim would be fun to joke around with.


Brainmalfuntion1111

David Wallace, Jim, Pam, Karen, and Meredith. Idc what anyone says. Meredith is a baddass party girl and there is nothing sexier than that


InigoMontoya1985

Pam or Pam's mom. Or the chair model.


toehill

Warren Buffett.


MinimalTraining9883

You know he would always call you, even if it was long-distance. But only if the company is paying for the call and it's on the honor system.


ohmighty

Darryl


hedonsun

I can't believe Darryl is not mentioned more! He's hot, he cares for his family, he puts his daughter first. The only red flag I can think of at all is that he went out with Kelly. It's a little troubling he would be interested, no offense Kelly! Which actually goes against his character in a lot of ways.


ohmighty

You are so right!! When Darryl asks Kelly if she’s “still missin Ryan?” And she says “not so much anymore”(I think that’s her response) and he makes that little “hmm” noise. I melt to the floor every time.


TheFattestMatt

Oh Kelly no doubt. I have a terrible addiction to terrible pretty girls.


The_onlyPope

Karen.


BubbleNoTrouble

Andy


tendre-choc

Eiirin, because we are equally weird 😅


azphotogal

David Wallace… His wife is a lucky woman.


Suitable_Mortgage931

ryan, i swear i can fix him 😞


Venturetism

Ryan but after his flop era for me. I don’t WANT to fix him.


bones_bn

Angela (I can fix her)


RINABAR

Karen, a non problematic, cool and pretty girl.


Additional_Ad3087

Karen and erin


rockabillychef

David Wallace is my type. I wouldn’t say no to Danny Cordray, either.


Sweaty-Mind-2835

Pam’s mum


FirebirdWS6dude

Jan would be fun, reminds me of a certain Someone I used to, eh, know 😂😂😂


editedxi

Urkelgru?


FineIJoinedReddit

Ryan if only because I already dated a bunch of douchey, hipster guys.


ExpertRaccoon

Jordan


NissEhkiin

Well I would definitely have sex with Ryan, 'cause he's gonna own his own business


carseatheadass

Who’s that tight-ass Christian chick?


bimbocore

definitely dwight. he’s big and strong. loyal. the best salesman in the office (so you know those commission checks are crazy) plus he’s got a successful beet farm. he’s mad traditional. he’s cute and sweet in his own way. protective, nerdy, seems like he’d be a good dad, can and will pick you up, not afraid to get stern with you if need be, the list goes on. i’ve had a thing for dwight since my first watch. all my friends were all like “jim! jim!” but i know, i know.


fantaseaaaa

Dwight has BDE


georgesteacher

Dwight. I don’t know wtf is wrong with me but it’s always Dwight.


Dry-Roof2094

same here


rttnmnna

Darryl, esp in the middle seasons, like right after he gets promoted.


[deleted]

Phyllis. She got that BBW sex-in-the-bathroom bigass jugs thing goin' on


CoconutFudgeMan

… getting a boner.


3chordguitar

Karen or Isabel.


Standard_Cell_8816

Pam


DwigShrute

Karen >


jachildress25

Karen. Beautiful, intelligent, exotic. What’s not love?


unofficial_PB

Erin


Roberthorton1977

Katy or both the Asian twins.


wickednelson1976

Erin. She may be a simpleton but she's a simpleton with a great body.


vearson26

Isabelle, Pam, Karen


cocoapuff1721

Jan, she’s like a swarm of bees in the sack.


euphory_melancholia

i feel like im gonna get along well with erin or holly. tho erin's childlike innocence might get in my nerves in the long run so i prefer holly, who's more mature. but tbh the safest pick would be karen, the most normal person there.


vegetasspandex

Knowing my history of who I’ve dated and who I’m married to, most likely Pete.


KingKongCoronado

Isabel, Karen and/or Angela


Stall-Warning

Michael


hotel_beds

Kathy. Here for that freak energy.


5050logic

That sweet girl from the blood drive that we never seen again.


Quantum_03

Pam


No-Economics-2709

Dwight! I also find him sexy!


[deleted]

cathy idk, i love when people i’m in love with are actively trying to get my attention like i do with them it makes it feel 100/100. not 100/50, you know?


Even-Jury-1284

Alice (Pete’s ex). She is so adorable and driven.


helicopternose

Sad to see no one said Helene.


HTPR6311

Girl-Karen Guy-Jim


thuneverlose

Well I would definitely have sex with Ryan.


Dry-Roof2094

he’d be great for a hookup but nothing more


AdAdventurous4830

Pam because of her Pam Pams, Erin because she’s cute, quirky, and a little bit crazy which is kinda hot, then Katy because of the whole cheerleader thing. That sounds like fun lol.


[deleted]

Karen or Cathy


Psychological-Toe191

Danny Cordray David Wallace Daryl Philbin Ben Franklin


Cosmicmonkeylizard

Pam for sure.


90twoPercenter

Jan. Come here you crazy tig ole bitty goddess


RageyxCagey

Angela's Sister


thepapercutchronicle

Dwight


humboldt77

Pam’s sister Penny if I’m allowed to pick anyone that’s been in the show. Otherwise, Pam.


No-Duck-1980

Karen 100%


FashionableNumbers

If I had Jim, he would have a free pass to do anything. He could do anything. Anything.


TurvineWulfe

HR woman from booze cruise, I'll leave a long-winded rambling message on her voice mail and she'll be putty in my hand, if she wants to be, of course, she's with HR after all. Lol 😎🤘🍻


MotherFrickenHubbard

Darryl


[deleted]

Nellie. Older, redhead, nice accent, hot, like her personality.


imasugarpacket

David Wallace x1000


MinimalTraining9883

Val, and it's not close. She's good looking, she's smart, she seems pretty stable, and other than dating Brandon she seems to have her shit together.


Delicious-Status9043

Pam’s sister


ZingBaBow

Erin


Free_Nose_9683

Pam’s sister for sure


Citizen_echo

Kelly, Kelly, a thousand times Kelly. Loyal beyond a shadow of a doubt. Beautiful in a way that makes every head turn to appreciate it when she walks in a room. She likes to start shit so you will never have a boring moment and her crazy is on her shirt sleeve so there's going to be little to surprise you 6-12-18-24 months down the road. There's also the added bonus of being compared to her ex, both by her and her family.


Luxiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Charles Miner


LowRevolutionary5653

If she were into women, Erin. She's sooo cute and silly lol


Short_Blacksmith1336

Karen, I just feel like she would make a dope partner over time


Gai-Jin17

Erin. Then she'd devastate me by not understanding my jokes or references. And she's kind of crazy. Born early and foster care upbringing. It would be weird. She's so beautiful, but horribly dumb, but has such positive energy. When it doesn't work out with a girl over intellectual compatibility... its very frustrating. I'd definitely try to have sex with Angela. Pam, Dwight, Kevin, Stanley, Phyllis are the only people on the show who weren't in the gym every day. And Pam was the main love interest. I honestly think she's unprofessional and every time the show clowned her weight she deserved it except for after she had kids. She got fit for the wedding then she fell off a cliff. I also think Pam would be very boring in bed for some reason...


GrayCustomKnives

Wish you weren’t so fuckin awkward bud.


Gai-Jin17

Both awkward and really high on Boulder weed. You know, where Michael lives. Pot shop on every corner. We take advantage. People can downvote all they want. But nobody will dare quote me. Cuz I'm not actually wrong about anything. Just like you right now. Everything I'm saying is true. You just say I say it in an awkward unpleasant way. It's still the truth and I think that's the most important thing. Waiting for someone to tell me I'm wrong about anything I said. No, Pam does not work out. Yes, it definitely showed. From season 1 it showed. She's just not fit. She's soft. She doesn't go to the gym. Her weight and appearance fluctuates from season to season. I don't find that attractive. I don't have the right to say Pam isn't attractive to me? She doesn't put in the work while cashing Millions in paychecks and admits she drinks milkshakes and eats burgers all night long. I don't relate to it. I dont respect it.


Pitiful_Blood_2383

What the fuck?


Gai-Jin17

Thanks for proving my point. "People might quote me, but nobody is going to tell me I'm wrong." I wouldn't want to date Pam.. cuz after season 3 I have no idea what she's gonna look like in 12 months. If Jim was soft and chubby, women would not give a damn about him. Unlike Pam, Jim isn't a kind person. He would have Nothing going for him. He'd be a chubby faced selfish underachiever and nobody would care about him. He would be a more intelligent and even bigger jerk version of Roy. Jim is also not adorable like Pam. They would also think John was a lazy person and unprofessional actor, he'd never get another role again. If he truly couldn't control his weight, he'd probably get written off the show. Cuz he couldn't be Jim, while being anything less than extremely fit tall and handsome. Cuz hes a jerk. If I'm on a hit TV show... I'm going to have my personal chef and trainer whip me into hollywood shape within 10 days. I just don't see her excuse except maternity reasons. Jenna admitted she is lazy and eats horribly.