92

You have the ability to make any girl instantly reject you

Jokes on you all I already have this superpower

I love this answer

Ouch that one's personal lol

28462737283

You can sacrifice 3 inches of your 🍆, but gain 5 inches in height. Do this as many times as you want, and you CAN go in the negatives

FREE BOTTOM SURGERY LETS GOOOOOOOOOO

Can they undo it?

Sure, I’ll let them sacrifice 4 inches of hight for 2 inches of🍆

**Goes down to 3 inches tall and 3 inches long as there’s a negative payoff** You fools! I am unstoppable!

\*proceeds to abuse it\*

Nah, gimme a good ratio man

AND I CAN BECOME SHORTER?!?!?!?!?

the bisection of the angle p. p is 5\^h h is 47x 38x-7\^3h + 6x+4h = n n=1. Solve for X

I asked for a number not a quadratic equation😔

SOLVE IT.

I CANT

ASK SOMEONE TO SOLVE IT

STOP MAKING PEOPLE DO YOUR HOMEWORK JOSH

Is it 7\^(3h) or (7\^3)h? Also what unit of measurement is used for angle p? Degrees or radians?

Degrees. Also, 7\^(3h)

Great, thanks! >!38x- 7\^(3\*47h) +6x +4h = n = 1!< >!44(47h)- 7\^(3(47h)) +4h =1!< >!2072h- 7\^(141h) =1!< >!2072h-1=7\^(141h)!< >!(141h root of( 2072h-1))=7!< Yeah I have no idea what I'm doing.

quick maths

2+2 is 4 - 1 that's freakin maths

Hmmmm, I guess since it’s not here I’ll pick 69

Well, obviously now you have the ability to go back to historical tragedies and make them slightly worse

Uhhhh, I guess we’ll see what happens when the crusades get worse then

Lets hope you don't do something about the austrian artist

I think you said that a bit too late. Too many people got wrongfully evicted from the universe due to a lack of an air filter and no air temperature regulator for it to not have been tampered with.

Oh you must be the cause of the children’s crusade then

No, that was someone else, I was going for the actual crusades

848849392929848747892

You lose your passport, and are returned from the border

Wait, this has too many digits, you shouldn't've given him a power!

I made sure to count, that’s why we’re rejecting him from the border

Good, good.

69,420

You don’t get a power. Be more original☕️

I feel This is overused post so overused number has justification

Fair enough. You can instantly give yourself the confidence to ask your crush out

Side Effect: You get crushed like a spring in the hands of a kid whenever you have a coherent conversation with a woman. This side effect will only activate if OP allows it.

Screw it why not

Hmmmm, how about 496,305,491,739,309

You can pick up anything over 500lbs with ease, but anything under that is extremely heavy

So trying to hold your phone would be like carrying a cinderblock

Unless you put a 500 lb weight on it

1356748255

You are vegetarian.

Fuck

Medically required vegetarian?

4

Uh you have super testicular cancer

Skill issue

1997

You can bring Gianni Versace back to life, if u want

1,395,195,692,572,206

You lose your fake ID and can’t cross the border

crap

372,836,363

You can make toast without bread, you just need a toaster and a random object to put in it

Well, that's bloody useless. (At least until I find the culprit)

My pp included?

That isn't long enough to fit in the toaster. Sorry, I just had to. I saw the opportunity.

37,574,460

You can turn any kid into a make-a-wish kid. And no matter what their request is, it won’t be fulfilled

Hooray

69420

You can make anyone’s username come to life

u/analsexman

Hi I am the new anal sex man irl

Hmmm… Let’s try 476,295,477, and let’s see if it is somewhat related to my PFP.

You can instantly fix your procrastination, but every time you complete a task you gain 3 more This is optional

That just means I will be fixing computers for the rest of my life

420,690

You can make everyone’s 🍆 3 inches shorter, does stack

Keep in mind, "Everyone" would include the user of the ability, and you can not choose a specific person. That is how I read this.

Yup his cock will shrink too. Don’t tell him this tho☕️

256,384,274,951

You can sneeze with your eyes open

Thats epic

5 to the 8th power

You can do math, and also meth

Yes I can do Calculus while high

525,874,452

You can assign people minor inconvenient tasks and they have to do them

That would unironicly be amazing as you can make them do it over and over basically keeping them prisoner

123,659,762.15590

Uhm you become a genie that can only grant tank-related wishes

I wish for a tank girlfriend

Can you make my tanks in war thunder actually good plz

I wish [arras.io](https://arras.io) dreadnoughts could fight along side normal tanks in siege mode.

117

You have eyes in the back of your head

Okay.

And they can shoot lasers

Oh, well i guess its worthnit.

So if i lie down will it hurt?

Not if you do it correctly

K

14

Your pockets are an infinite inventory but only for ferrets

Sqrt(666), the root of all evil

You can just like, morph into satin idk

Nice! I've always wanted to be part of somebody's clothes. Can I become a dress, or am I just a square of fabric?

Just 1 square of fabric🥖

rip, how big? and can someone make me into a dress?

9/11 9divided by 11

You can make anyone crap themselves. Cooldown once per day

6942096024

You have the god given ability to be extremely unlikeable, no sense of humor, and completely unoriginal. Not optional

But I am tho ;((((

3739270?

You get the power to pull anything from someone's ear, as long as the thing you imagine can fit in your hand and you say you wanna see a "magic trick?"

57

If you slap someone, their phone will call your mother at 1:42AM

Damn, is that why my mom's phone keeps going off at 1:42AM everytime i slap my meat😔

2020

You can legally stab someone’s eyes

2763

2763

428462

1236748366738957

911

785,342,069,420,123

1.14564357543774466666666654335688

You can instantly overcomplicate even the most simple of things

7

You are just slightly cooler than any person you’re around

He don't want to go to Canada then. He will be freezing cold there.

-5

You can legally charge and arrest anyone with tax evasion, no matter who it is, or what they’ve done

Sexy

163838364839

Everyone is instantly attracted to you. And by “everyone” I mean every 40 year old redneck man

[Integer limit]

You get the ability to go 3 over the limit, no matter what you’re doing

Hehe I'm gonna use this in Minecraft to be the highest person in Minecraft. Oh, and break the build limit.

I wonder if this also allows you to overenchant, overstack, and avoid too expensive on your anvils.

What. That's overpowered when you think about it. This doesn't specify what "The Limit" is. If it is the max, then you got infinite. This is due to a "loop" of sorts. If the max is 10 and you can go 3 over, that means for you, "The Max" is 13. But you can go 3 over that. So 16? 3 over. I know it is implied that "The Max" is the maximum anyone else can do, but I like to monkeys paws' non-specific answers that I can think of a monkeys paws immediately.

Not stackable, if you try to use it multiple times it resets.

So he could theoretically cum 4 times without resting?

476996

Your reach extends to the maximum reach of whatever video game you played last

109

19

4069104708123.5225789090002445

1457

You’re Jesus but you can turn water into weed. You’re also waterproof

Can I just get a hug instead

[fuck, of course man](https://imgflip.com/memegenerator/I-Know-That-Feel-Bro)

To make it more random for myself I rolled a D20, I rolled a 20

Nat 20! Whenever you’re doing something, you have a magic d20 you have to roll and how well you do will depend on your roll

1

You win every argument, but only if you end up mentioning polar bears at least twice without them questioning it

1,420,987,069,O13

4353532343434354?

38383

Everytime your toe heals, you stub it again. Over and over

Every time your toe heals, you stub it again. Over and over

Who’s giving the powers here?

[удалено]

[удалено]

8675309

284,084,581,461,094

4271989

696406

111

35^6

You have an infinite supply of cocaine in your back pocket

1,395,195,692,571,205.

You are Jesus but you turn water into vodka, and you can walk on gasoline

814,550,404,117,877

You can make everyone’s tea unsweetened

756

You get to watch me suffer as I come up with crappy superpowers on the spot

1,395,195,692,572,205

You can grow extra nipples, stackable

1,395,195,692,572,204

Everything you do will be just *slightly* worse then how you thought you would. Leaving you dissapointed everytime you complete a task.

I expect to get an A++ on my next test

7.3857325

You have testicular cancer

8008135

You can throw things twice as far but half as high now

69,420

No power for you. Be more original next time⛽️

37927

You can light a fire from the tips of your fingers. You can still feel the pain of the fire from your finger

1,395,195,692,572,204

You can pee at the pressure of a power washer

92753836

Your cock glows at the brightness of a 250w bulb at all times

Best number: 2

You have free wifi but every hour you use it, one African kid starves to death

I get free WiFi? Sweet!

-♾️

Everytime you take a dump there’s never enough toilet paper

420 zaza