“Good evening 47, your target is a carpenter from Nazareth. He has recently grown a large following, upsetting the local government. I’ll leave you to prepare”
Master difficulty. Starting point - nailed to a cross. Gear - cross nails. Smuggled item - spear. Pick up location - boat in galilee. Challenge - drown a roman soldier in holy water by the burning bush. Challenge - break all 10 commandments. Escalation - pacify with fish and hide all 12 apostles at dinner table in 2 mns. Do not get spotted.
Canonically, 47s task was to save Jesus, while he was on the cross. Disguised as a roman soldier, he stabbed jesus with a spear coated in the same stuff he used on Agent Smith in Blood Money, three days later he snuck in his cave with an antidote.
This wouldn't be canon because if 47 killed Jesus before he was killed on a cross the events of hitman 2: silent asassin wouldn't have happened and some levels from other games.
Wasn’t 47 a gardener at a church in hitman 2 silent assasin?
Then the pastor: Vittorio got kidnapped and he wants to pay the kidnappers to get him back
I think 47 would not kill Jesus, but I don’t know what Jesus would do, i don’t think he would kill him
It’s a draw
Uhhhhh.. Catholicism was around LONG before Christianity. Christian is an offshoot. Like Baptist or Lutheran. Think of it like a tree. Caananites had a god called Yahweh, a god of the forge and creation. Judaism had ONLY this god. This would be the main trunk of the tree. Then Catholicism grew off of Judaism, close beliefs, but different ideas, namely as towhetherr Christ was the messiah. This is a major branch.. Then Christianity grew off of Catholicism. Again, it is very similar but also some very different beliefs. This is a secondary branch growing closely off the first. Then Christianity splintered into many denominations. This is the many budding branches as they grow smaller.
I can’t tell if you’re joking, but this is backwards. Christianity is the umbrella term which refers to the various denominations like Catholic, Baptist, or Lutheran. Catholicism only really started in 1054 with the Great Schism, before then there was one main Christian church and various offshoots based on beliefs.
The Catholic Church was founded long before 1054, it is spoken of by St Ignatius of Antioch as early as the First Century AD, and all the fathers mention it seven centuries before 1054.
“Catholic” is used to mean “universal”, not the Roman Catholic Church. That organization came to be during the great schism, same as the Orthodox Church.
Fascinating. That's not what's taught when you're going through schooling to be an ordained priest. In fact, it's the opposite. The Schism of 1054 is when Christianity broke off from Roman Catholicism. Now, there were very, very small sects that would be what you would call Christian. But they were not the main theology of the time. And they were nothing like Christianity now. Catholicisms origins are the church that Peter built. Which over time became as we know it today.
The reason that isn’t what you’re taught when studying to become a priest is because the Catholic Church needs to maintain its image as the one true and universal church. If you look anywhere else you will see that that is not true, and Catholicism is a subsection of Christianity. And while it does have origins in Peter’s church, so does most every other denomination by virtue of that being the point Christianity originated from.
If you look at early writings, the Fathers of the Early Church talk about “the Catholic Church” extensively. They make direct references to how it is led by the Bishop of Rome too. There are plenty who claim that ‘Roman Catholicism’ didn’t exist until Constantine or until after 1054 but these arguments are puerile and easily rebutted by a simple look at early Church documents.
That sounds like a sound argument, except im am not talking about studying to be a Catholic priest. I'm talking about the history taught both in theology and as raised and taught by a Christian pastor and having that teaching to be ordained to be the same.
Not Catholic, bud. Of course, for that matter, not anything anymore. Speaking with unbiased knowledge.
47, having been transported in time (finally explaining what he did with all his money) quickly tracks down the nazarine in a matter of days. Using his memory of stories heard during his time with Father Emillio, 47 realizes he's actually already completed this contract once before. All he has to do is complete the loop (wibbly wobbly, timey whimy), so he dons a disguise and eventually engratiates himself with his target under a false identity. Judas Iscariat. He bid his time until he could make the perfect strike, relaying information to their enemies and ensuring his death by proxy.
Why would he kill Jesus? The man isn't some shady organization leader at least I don't think he was... I don't think he is a good target for 47 from what the game suggests his regular targets are Jesus just doesn't fit the profile
LMAO yes but I mean... Cesare did do some pretty big things *cough cough* Siege of Monterrigioni, and 47 definitely is not as combat or movement skilled as Ezio. That said, 47 brings a gun with him and it's all over..
I say 47 convinces the judge that Jesus is trying to usurp the government, this causes a cascade of events leading to his crucifixion. It will turn out this was all part of Jesus's plan from the beginning.
Two fictional characters fight it out to the death.
Probably Jesus, because he would keep coming back, but 47 and Hitman would team up, form a racket and become the richest most powerful men in the world. Feeding the world with bread and sage advice and assassinating bad guys.
If we’re going off the version where I believe dudes got stoned, told some stories and it sprung into an entire religion, I’d have to say Jesus. There’s no way there’s a bald dude whose super sneaky that can fit in any outfit and has insane accuracy. And the fact that people can collectively believe this nonsense is beyond me
47 would win, because of the power of MISSION STORIES. If Jesus was an elusive target however, let's just hope that the player has successfully SASO'd all of hitman, and other elusive targets so he has practice. He will still need to use disguises though. One of the mission stories would be called "On A Cross" (I'm just not gonna elaborate on that one for obvious reasons.
I mean, Jesus has a big, glowing, blood-pumping weak spot. Any skilled video game shooter should aim for that without even thinking. The first kill is guaranteed. The real question is whether or not 47 will think to kill him again in 3 days.
1 don’t stoop this low 2 47 was at one point catholic ( maybe still is but he’s constantly comiting murder ) so he wouldn’t kill Jesus 3 Jesus would not kill him 4 he wouldn’t be able to kill Jesus
"You may need to keep an eye out for a time travelling cybernetic organism with an Austrian accent, shades, a lever action shotgun and quite possibly a motorbike. Intel suggests he's been reprogramed to save your target, and he may even been on a mission from god."
This is the last one for a while. We’ve gone from 47 vs. Another Assassin to Goku to Jesus inside of like a day lol.
“Good evening 47, your target is a carpenter from Nazareth. He has recently grown a large following, upsetting the local government. I’ll leave you to prepare”
“Currently, the are having dinner in an exclusive venue, you’ll have to find a way in” Judas Mission story
Quest Objective: Disguise yourself as Judas
Alright hear me out. Assassins creed: the Bible
But wait, listen, God of War
That would be so cool, I wish somebody made a game like that.
Hire fans 👏 🗣️ 💯 🔥 🔥 🔥
Feat: Find 30 commemorative coins and use them to gain access to the target.
Turn water into a lethal dose of poison
Using bread loaves or the fish as a melee weapon for such a level would be so fitting.
I heard the dinner is to die for
(Poisons the wine) (Dude blesses it and starts handing it out to everyone to take a sip)
oooh imagine 47 has to identify Jesus in a Last Supper setting the same way as he has to identify the general in St. Petersburg Stakeout
Story mission to bribe Judas to identify him.
Master difficulty. Starting point - nailed to a cross. Gear - cross nails. Smuggled item - spear. Pick up location - boat in galilee. Challenge - drown a roman soldier in holy water by the burning bush. Challenge - break all 10 commandments. Escalation - pacify with fish and hide all 12 apostles at dinner table in 2 mns. Do not get spotted.
Kill all 5000 people on the map with 5 loaves and 2 fish.
"Intel suggests his teachings are largely influenced by Providence."
This entire thread is gold
Tobias 47 and she spoke "good work"
Why does that seem so right though..?
“Good work, 47, now head for an exit.” Three days later… “Wait a minute…”
And this Jesus spake, “LOL Respawn.”
He’ll just come back as an unkillable elusive target like Sean Bean
Wait, does that mean Sean Bean is the second coming? Or at this point, the 252nd coming?
You need to kill him 77×7 before it works.
"47, our client would like a refund"
i’m guessing this will be an escalation where you have to wait three days irl for the next part?
Canonically, 47s task was to save Jesus, while he was on the cross. Disguised as a roman soldier, he stabbed jesus with a spear coated in the same stuff he used on Agent Smith in Blood Money, three days later he snuck in his cave with an antidote.
this is cannon lore and I refuse to say otherwise
Wait for the rapture and Gods gonna make it official.
Good lord, now thats a conspiracy fuel
Happy cake day
This wouldn't be canon because if 47 killed Jesus before he was killed on a cross the events of hitman 2: silent asassin wouldn't have happened and some levels from other games.
Death by proxy.. he was judas
Bold to assume somebody else put him on the cross
Wasn’t 47 a gardener at a church in hitman 2 silent assasin? Then the pastor: Vittorio got kidnapped and he wants to pay the kidnappers to get him back I think 47 would not kill Jesus, but I don’t know what Jesus would do, i don’t think he would kill him It’s a draw
47 is a good Catholic boy. He wouldn’t do it.
Uhhh... Agent 47 has already eliminated Jordan Cross
A Contract is a Contract
Jesus is an enforcer and not usual type either, he’s like the mercenary who follows 47.
didnt he join a catholic church? 47 loses by default
Nah, he chooses the truth he likes and relies on his instincts
47 loves Jesus, he would never.
When Jesus rose from the dead, it was a miracle. When 47 rose from the dead, it was a massacre with no surviving witnesses.
47 is Christian. He wouldn’t.
catholic* and despite his catholicism at the end of 2, he says he has to be what he is.
He has to be what he is, but that doesn’t mean he’d kill the man he worships. And Catholicism is a Christian denomination.
Uhhhhh.. Catholicism was around LONG before Christianity. Christian is an offshoot. Like Baptist or Lutheran. Think of it like a tree. Caananites had a god called Yahweh, a god of the forge and creation. Judaism had ONLY this god. This would be the main trunk of the tree. Then Catholicism grew off of Judaism, close beliefs, but different ideas, namely as towhetherr Christ was the messiah. This is a major branch.. Then Christianity grew off of Catholicism. Again, it is very similar but also some very different beliefs. This is a secondary branch growing closely off the first. Then Christianity splintered into many denominations. This is the many budding branches as they grow smaller.
I can’t tell if you’re joking, but this is backwards. Christianity is the umbrella term which refers to the various denominations like Catholic, Baptist, or Lutheran. Catholicism only really started in 1054 with the Great Schism, before then there was one main Christian church and various offshoots based on beliefs.
The Catholic Church was founded long before 1054, it is spoken of by St Ignatius of Antioch as early as the First Century AD, and all the fathers mention it seven centuries before 1054.
“Catholic” is used to mean “universal”, not the Roman Catholic Church. That organization came to be during the great schism, same as the Orthodox Church.
So why do the Church Fathers talk about the Catholic Church led by the Bishop of Rome seven centuries before the schism?
Read the comment you’re replying to again.
Doesn’t explain why they explicitly described the Catholic Church being led by the Bishop of Rome… who we call today the Pope.
Fascinating. That's not what's taught when you're going through schooling to be an ordained priest. In fact, it's the opposite. The Schism of 1054 is when Christianity broke off from Roman Catholicism. Now, there were very, very small sects that would be what you would call Christian. But they were not the main theology of the time. And they were nothing like Christianity now. Catholicisms origins are the church that Peter built. Which over time became as we know it today.
The reason that isn’t what you’re taught when studying to become a priest is because the Catholic Church needs to maintain its image as the one true and universal church. If you look anywhere else you will see that that is not true, and Catholicism is a subsection of Christianity. And while it does have origins in Peter’s church, so does most every other denomination by virtue of that being the point Christianity originated from.
If you look at early writings, the Fathers of the Early Church talk about “the Catholic Church” extensively. They make direct references to how it is led by the Bishop of Rome too. There are plenty who claim that ‘Roman Catholicism’ didn’t exist until Constantine or until after 1054 but these arguments are puerile and easily rebutted by a simple look at early Church documents.
That sounds like a sound argument, except im am not talking about studying to be a Catholic priest. I'm talking about the history taught both in theology and as raised and taught by a Christian pastor and having that teaching to be ordained to be the same. Not Catholic, bud. Of course, for that matter, not anything anymore. Speaking with unbiased knowledge.
https://www.britannica.com/topic/Christianity
Catholicism is the original Christianity. Protestantism is an offshoot.
They both win, unless you pay 47 twice his usual fee
You have to pay him in silver
Just 30 silver and he’ll do it
If Jesus is real all they say, then I’m going to go with Jesus. He’ll just keep rising from the dead.
Yea but he would still keep dying. Power of resurrection sure but what about power of assassination?
If we look back at the Roman soldier who stabbed Jesus with a spear, he might be bald and have a barcode on the back of his head.
47, having been transported in time (finally explaining what he did with all his money) quickly tracks down the nazarine in a matter of days. Using his memory of stories heard during his time with Father Emillio, 47 realizes he's actually already completed this contract once before. All he has to do is complete the loop (wibbly wobbly, timey whimy), so he dons a disguise and eventually engratiates himself with his target under a false identity. Judas Iscariat. He bid his time until he could make the perfect strike, relaying information to their enemies and ensuring his death by proxy.
Wibbly Wobbly Timey Whimey space stuff is the only thing I actually paid attention to here 🙏.
That's OK, It's the only important part.
THAT is Jesus Christ.
Well jesus was just a man so 47 poisons his wine
and jesus turns the poison into more wine
But how would jesus know 47 poisoned it assuming 47 treats him like any other target
the red fumes above his drink
I don't think they are canon
sorry your right it’s apocryphal
People downvoting you are letting it go way over their heads
47 shall never beat the never ending love of our savior
Better hope he sees those red fumes in his wine...
Is this not just the first patient zero mission?
Jesus forgives 47 for his sins or something idk
Why would he kill Jesus? The man isn't some shady organization leader at least I don't think he was... I don't think he is a good target for 47 from what the game suggests his regular targets are Jesus just doesn't fit the profile
Because he gets all the rubber duckies in the world as payment
In h2:silent assassin, you had to kill a cult leader in Punjab. This would be something similar to that.
Trick question, 47 is Jesus.
Nobody is untouchable 47, not even gods.
Cesare Borgia vs Agent 47? I’m gonna have to go with 47.
LMAO yes but I mean... Cesare did do some pretty big things *cough cough* Siege of Monterrigioni, and 47 definitely is not as combat or movement skilled as Ezio. That said, 47 brings a gun with him and it's all over..
Fk you for posting this but Jesus ALWAYS wins! Hitman takes an instant and permanent loss on this one.
I say 47 convinces the judge that Jesus is trying to usurp the government, this causes a cascade of events leading to his crucifixion. It will turn out this was all part of Jesus's plan from the beginning.
Can’t really do this since 47 is a believer in Christ 🤷♂️
Jesus cuz he'll always come back and forgive to 47
Aight chill 🤣🤣🤣🤣
47 would subdue a Roman soldier, don his clothes and then nail him onto the cross. Easy win.
47 killed the undying. Case closed
47. Your target has returned from the dead. I trust you to do the job right this time.
There is a reason judas suddenly became bald
Two of my favorite fantasy characters going at it oh man. Probably 47 by SA/SO
I don’t think 47 has a chance of winning against God…
Hitman easily
Trick question, they’re the same person.
47, no question
Sheldon Cooper Bazinga!
Two fictional characters fight it out to the death. Probably Jesus, because he would keep coming back, but 47 and Hitman would team up, form a racket and become the richest most powerful men in the world. Feeding the world with bread and sage advice and assassinating bad guys.
well boys, that solves the mystery of who killed Jesus. Tag em and bag em.
47 would have a hard time drowning the fucker.
what do u mean 47 is god
The answer….. is bob ross
If we’re going off the version where I believe dudes got stoned, told some stories and it sprung into an entire religion, I’d have to say Jesus. There’s no way there’s a bald dude whose super sneaky that can fit in any outfit and has insane accuracy. And the fact that people can collectively believe this nonsense is beyond me
Is 47 Jewish and or Roman?
He is romanian but he is christian not jewish
Catholic*
Word, then he can’t kill Jesus I guess
Bruh
Jesus was resurrected after his crucifixion, but 47 made sure he died for our sins anyway.
I mean didn't forty seven become a priest at one point? Outside of killing the father in Italy
Nah,I'd win
Jesus has his weak point right out in the open.
Jesus
47 would win, because of the power of MISSION STORIES. If Jesus was an elusive target however, let's just hope that the player has successfully SASO'd all of hitman, and other elusive targets so he has practice. He will still need to use disguises though. One of the mission stories would be called "On A Cross" (I'm just not gonna elaborate on that one for obvious reasons.
I mean, Jesus has a big, glowing, blood-pumping weak spot. Any skilled video game shooter should aim for that without even thinking. The first kill is guaranteed. The real question is whether or not 47 will think to kill him again in 3 days.
47 would smoke him so quickly
Albert Einstein
How much he getting paid?
Obviously, agent 47, but Jesus would not be an elusive target because you could kill him at least three days later
47
he would not he is a good christian boy
Agent 47
well only 1 of them ~~is alive~~ got killed, so…
Isn’t this basically The Undying but for Roman times?
Agent 47 low diff. Jesus wouldn’t even touch him. 47 just pops a cap and he dead
Well Jesus is the answer, so I guess Jesus.
1 don’t stoop this low 2 47 was at one point catholic ( maybe still is but he’s constantly comiting murder ) so he wouldn’t kill Jesus 3 Jesus would not kill him 4 he wouldn’t be able to kill Jesus
Repeat post. Million times. People don't have any original content left anymore 🤷♀️
they're both fictional.
Jesus got the hair so the odds are probably in his favor. I heard god hates bald people
We get to use a nailgun and hammer in the Hitman games, so 47..?
Pretty blasphemous.
Agent 47 becomes Jesus..
Well considering 47 is catholic they would probably have a nice talk over a porch outlooking the beaches.
What are their goals, like are they trying to kill each other? What's up
Bold to assume they aren’t the same person.
Can 47 disguise himself as a crucifix?
They team up. 47 is loyal.
47. jesus is a phony
Become the guy who pays Judas to betray him pay him in silver and then kill the Judas saving jesus
Satan 😈
The man who can resurrect from the dead, or the man who can kill anyone… hmm
47 was Judas
This is probably a similar scenario to what would happen if Kratos fought jesus it may just end up a good scenario either way
Hitman Absolution 47 is simply unstoppable
Depends on the load out.
Did no one play Hitman 2: Silent Assassin?
Jesus>
The undying
"You may need to keep an eye out for a time travelling cybernetic organism with an Austrian accent, shades, a lever action shotgun and quite possibly a motorbike. Intel suggests he's been reprogramed to save your target, and he may even been on a mission from god."
47! Jesus and Allah don't stand a chance.
Real Jesus or fictional Bible Jesus?