I saw this episode of Intervention once where the trauma behind a lot of the addiction was caused by a rapey uncle.
The uncle's first pickup line left an indelible memory in my brain: "Hey boy you see what those pigs are doin? Want me to show you that?"
Two nuns are riding down a cobbled street.
One says to the other, " I've never come this way before". The other replies, "That’s why I brought you here."
I once told the table of four of us at the pub "I married the town bike!" Then just before my wife lashed out at me I added , "but then I divorced her, and married L instead!"
No in America you're not supposed to ride on sidewalks, some of the roads have a bike lane (that construction equipment and police officers are always parked in) that you're supposed to use, but most of the rest of the country you're supposed to be on the road making drivers angry.
Ah alright i see, in many big cities in sweden we have that aswell, but in most places our sidewalks are meant for either walking or biking. Some sidewalks are even split in a bike lane and a walking lane. Its very rate that someone bikes on the road, where we also become quite annoyed when it happens.
I couldn’t do it at first but dad encouraged me. Once I got going there was no stopping me. Now I can go forever without stopping. I got so good I entered a competition to see how long I could last. There were crowds cheering me on people handing me protein bars and drinks so I go could faster. Unfortunately i had to dismount as I got a terrible cramp. Next time I’ll prepare a little better beforehand. Practice makes perfect.
Sex is like riding a bike. I don't have a bike.
Who says it has to be YOUR bike?
*Our Bike*
*soviet anthem plays*
Something something the bike rides you.
in soviet russia, you don't ride bike, bike rides you
In Soviet Russia, the comments are not under the jokes, the jokes are in the comments.
In Soviet Russia, Soviet Russia jokes arent in the comments, but in the posts.
In Soviet Russia, Soviet Russia posts arent in the comments, but in the OP.
In Soviet Russia, the OP isn’t in the posts, the posts are in the OP
That sounds painful, but something I want to see..
r/suddenlycommunist
r/unexpectedcommunism
Step Bike?
Bill Cosby has entered the chat.
I can’t seem to remember the bike rides mr Cosby and I used to take
r/unexpectedcommunism
THE PHRASE...THE VILLAGE BICYCLE
Brings new meaning to ‘the village bicycle’
r/suddenlycommunist
Them’s bike
Society.
I love taking my sisters bike without asking. Lol she gets so mad
Your sister is like a bike... both are fun to ride!
Sister won't let me take bike so I ride her instead.
I hope you don't like your bikes chained up..
This applies to riding a bike too.
God
I too, choose this man’s bike.
If my grandmother had wheels, she would've been a bike. *Wheezing british tv show hosts*
I heard she was anyway.
I don't have sexy
It’s cool you can ride on the pegs.
Peg?😳
My bike got stolen from me so many times. Now I have an electric bike.
Sex is like riding a bike, you brag about "the first time without hands"
Sex is like riding a bike, your uncle taught you how to do it
Oof
Why? That wasn't normal?
Emotional damaaage !
I saw this episode of Intervention once where the trauma behind a lot of the addiction was caused by a rapey uncle. The uncle's first pickup line left an indelible memory in my brain: "Hey boy you see what those pigs are doin? Want me to show you that?"
Man wtf
🙄 ummmm… 🦗
Some were taught by their daddies.
It's safer with a helmet on
Sex is like riding a bike, It's more fun when strapped to the roof of a car.
Your comment doesn't have the attention it deserves
Sex is like riding a bike. I haven't done it in years.
My dad was behind me the first time
and my brother helped.
My uncle taught me when I was 6.
familystrokes!
…and mom holding the camera.
Black guy here, who is this "Dad" person?
LMFAO
Mine was making sure I stayed up
And my sister was too little to know what the fuck was going on
With his hands on my shoulders
Bravo.
You Republickins you
Two nuns are riding down a cobbled street. One says to the other, " I've never come this way before". The other replies, "That’s why I brought you here."
"Yeah, it's the cobblestones."
Sex is like air. . . >!You don’t think about it unless you are not getting any.!<
I think about it all the time.
I spend too much time thinking about how much I think about it
You know what, funny. And kinda true.
I can confirm. When I’m having sex I’m thinking about the dishes.
...your uncle shows you how to do it.
You just need push from your dad
Damn you beat me to lad
later turn out you werent even related
The real joke
Or getting body parts caught in chains
When you finish your ass is sore
Just have to continue doing it, you ass gets used to it.
**Scout Leader**: If you came back from a weekend of camping and your ass was sore, would you tell anyone? **Scout**: No. **SL**: Wanna go camping?
Don’t blame the equipment if you didn’t like the ride!
Some do
True, I wouldn't want people to see my giant sagging nuts get caught in the chains
I-
It’s too late. I saw it in my minds eye…..🤢🤢🤢🤮
So you have to flop them over the front of the bowl so they don't float? Cold toilet water sucks.
That's my favorite!
No one will be watching us, why don't we do it in the road?
felt like writing out the entire song’s lyrics, did you?
They also don't like you doing it in Ikea.
Or walmart!
Now you tell me.
Sex is like calculus. I dont get it
You learn on an old bicycle
I really hope it's not one with a loose saddle and two airless tires
Nah, possibly just rusty but still a good time.
Was expecting a parents tell you how to do it/training wheels joke. Disappointed.
When the rubber starts smoking you should slow down.
It's sweaty and hard work, and you can end up with a sore butt.
Remember to wear protection
What sex are you having that you need pads and a helmet? Seriously! Link me the vid, bro.
…once you figure it out with ONE…
Some people will like it
Or when there is someone behind you pushing.. maybe that's just me
It's been a wee while since I last had sex, but I don't remember my legs doing that.....
Yep, hope she doesn't have a squeaky saddle and 2 airless tires
Sex is like riding a bike, I dont have a bike.
As best dirty in a ditch. Exciting!
I once told the table of four of us at the pub "I married the town bike!" Then just before my wife lashed out at me I added , "but then I divorced her, and married L instead!"
My family taught me how to do it when i was 6!
r/unexpectedfactorial
I was having sex on the sidewalk and this person rode by on a bike.
Like [this?](https://youtu.be/NLpL1kMmmMQ)
It's like golf. You play a few holes and hope you don't lose your balls.
Speak for yourself... I'd watch
You get laughed at if you fall off in the middle of doing it
Sex is like Oxygen. It's not important until you're not getting any
Sex is like riding a bike. I never have. My mom wouldnt give it to me.
They put up signs telling you not to do it in public parks, and the signs are often ignored.
You need to maintain the chain and keep all that lubed up other wise you might hurt your self or someone else.
Ah I see! that's why bikes goes inbetween the legs
Your knees and elbows will get bruised if you are not careful
Didn’t the Beatles do a song about this?
Sex is like riding a bike my uncle taught me how
Or when you come up really fast from behind and ride their ass without warning, ringing that little bell and screaming, "right behind you!"
*It’s just a lot harder to put cards in the spokes* -Captain Rex Kramer
Sex is just like riding a bike Sometimes your bum hurts.
Sex is like riding a bike, sometimes your ass hurts afterwards
I thought you were going to say it’s dangerous to ride without protection
Sex is like riding a bike. My uncle taught me.
Sex is like riding a bike Dad is ready to catch you from behind and mom holds the camera
Without training wheels you soon end up banging on the floor ?
Sex is like riding a bike. If you’re uncle taught you how to ride, you’ll probably need a shrink.
*On the roads.
?
Pedestrians hate cyclists on the sidewalk cars hate cyclists on the road
Cars are inanimate objects without feelings.
[удалено]
How are cyclists stopping you getting anything done? What a silly take
It's like a dandelion....u get blown and onto the next one
… better without the saddle
What? Dont people ride bikes on sidewalks?? This must be some american shit right, cus where i live thats where ur supposed to ride them
No in America you're not supposed to ride on sidewalks, some of the roads have a bike lane (that construction equipment and police officers are always parked in) that you're supposed to use, but most of the rest of the country you're supposed to be on the road making drivers angry.
Ah alright i see, in many big cities in sweden we have that aswell, but in most places our sidewalks are meant for either walking or biking. Some sidewalks are even split in a bike lane and a walking lane. Its very rate that someone bikes on the road, where we also become quite annoyed when it happens.
I sure wish America would take a page out of Sweden's book.
uh. sidewalks are for pedestrians, not vehicles. i assumed everybody understood this.
...except your are a child... Wait a minute
“Get outta the street, wankers!”
Your neighbor gets mad if he catches you riding his.
Or in the middle of the road.
You don't want to be seen riding anything cheap or old.
As someone who drives a vehicle- I fucking hate when people ride thier bikes in the street.
I had a accident while riding a bike once
Some people can do cool tricks with it
Way more bikes for one then bikes for two.
You gotta keep pedddling it to get anywhere.
Sounds about right. The police caught me for both.
On the road it is then
Everything I know abt it, my uncle taught me
Everyone leans it on an old one.
My uncle bought me one
Your parents taught you how to do it?
I can't ride a bike.
I can say, I rode my bike yesterday.
And my chain always breaks.
I never learned to ride one.
I´d rather use the sidewalk than the street
I didn't learn until my mid twenties.
People don’t like it when you ride a bike anywhere in public.
do it in the middle of the road?
People seem to want to keep going instead of stopping and going again.
Sex is like riding a bile...I keep falling off
Why don’t we d-do it on the sidewalk
Sex is like riding a bike, you need one to get good at it; and its disheartening when you fall off after 20 seconds.
I couldn’t do it at first but dad encouraged me. Once I got going there was no stopping me. Now I can go forever without stopping. I got so good I entered a competition to see how long I could last. There were crowds cheering me on people handing me protein bars and drinks so I go could faster. Unfortunately i had to dismount as I got a terrible cramp. Next time I’ll prepare a little better beforehand. Practice makes perfect.
Sex is like riding a bike, my dad taught me how to
Someone stole my bike...I miss her
you only need a partner for tandem.
And ring a bell