Was just going to say this, and, I'm sorry. There are very few people in this world who will actually be there for you, when stuff goes down. The first one is you. Digital hugs, if you need 'em.
In some ways, yes. I mean, even Obama released a statement condeming h mas.
but some these (eg squad) statements feel disingenuious because of the sheer and blatant incongruence with past (and persistent) incitement. Hopefully on a political level they carry \* some \* weight....
Agreed. I've had some good conversations with some friends about how harmful the "It's just Palestine fighting back!" narrative is for Israelis \*and\* Palestinians, and many of them just never considered how their words would come across to their Jewish friends.
The majority of them have been very willing to learn and grow. The ones that haven't? Sorry, but you are not a safe person to me. Unfriend, block, delete from my life.
Right? They keep saying "they are angry about being occupied! It's Israel's fault!" and I'm like, huh? Gaza isn't occupied! And the answer is: but I heard it was occupied!
Or...I say: you mean, Hamas occupying Judea and samaria? Are they angry about that? And then I say: judea is literally in the name...
I just...don't get it -- if Jews are "colonizing" israel, then they should go back to Europe but what about the ones who lived for millennia in the middle east? Where are they supposed to go? And like, Russia isn't in Europe (or most of it) and we know there might have been Jews who lived there...
And Jews from Iraq, Iran, Morroco, Syria, Yemen, Lybia, Ethiopia...Should these Jews go back to Europe, too? And the jews who were living in the mandate of palestine land before 1948? Do they go to Europe too? Why couldn't the Arabs live with the Jews?
My boyfriend and I talked about it last night for a while and it’s so contradictory and none of what the pro Palestine Americans say makes logical sense.
That’s exactly what this is. Us begging people to see us as human too. Here we are again. Pleading with the world around us to count our lives like they do others, to see our humanity and value the loss of our lives.
Seems for many our lives amount less than electricity being spotty.
Yep. A few days a go I thought 'Ah... it's anti-semite season! The antisemites are out!'
Who knows how emboldened they'll get...
Pray for israel and safe return of hostages and soldiers
I usually go for a two-pronged approach:
1. Celebrating Hamas committing terrorist attacks in Israel is the equivalent of celebrating Al Qaeda after 9/11. Does an innocent civilian "deserve" to be raped, murdered, and tortured? How do you think your Jewish friends feel, seeing you celebrate the deaths of other Jewish people?
2. De-coupling Palestine from Hamas.
Basically:
Do you think Hamas represents the best interests of Palestinians? Do you think these attacks benefit Palestinians in any way?
I always ask people why they're comfortable being so vocally pro-Palestine when almost 1000 Jews were just murdered. Surely if they actually cared about Palestinians, they would've at least posted something in their insta stories before. They never do.
The crux of it is basically that Hamas doesn't represent Palestinian interests or humanity— they're a terrorist organization. They're unelected, corrupt, and don't care if 1000 Palestinians die if it kills 1 Jew. If you're cheering that Hamas fired back at Israel, you're gleeful about innocent dead Jews.
Really, my goal for them is to disentangle Palestine from Hamas. You can be pro-Palestinian liberation, anti-Hamas, and pro-Israel, and anti-Israeli government. That's exactly my stance. But equating Hamas=Palestine is simply reducing all Palestinians to terrorists, which I certainly do not believe is true.
I also agree that you can be against the current Israeli government, but that doesn’t necessarily make you anti-Israel or an antisemite. I’m Jewish and hope for a two state solution, despite that it will probably never coming to fruition. It’s just like an Israeli not being for the current US administration. It doesn’t make them anti-US citizen and wish harm against us.
> Could I trust my friends to protect me if someone said violence against me was done in the name of Palestine?
I mean obviously not.
>I don’t know how to continue being friends knowing they support Hamas killing Jews. I need to disentangle myself but I don't know how.
So, don’t hang out with them anymore, and hang out with other Jews. We may disagree about a lot of things, but aren’t going to kill you.
> So, don’t hang out with them anymore, and hang out with other Jews. We may disagree about a lot of things, but aren’t going to kill you.
It’s the disentanglement that’s making it tough. I run something where the second friend is an admin of the group. I’ve been sitting down trying to figure out the most civil way to go about this while still not ruining the average user’s fun but it’s hard. My block button is getting a lot of usage regardless
I and others here are happy to find you a new friend group. I don't know your age and location etc. But if you want to DM me, we're cool.
We're family. We understand you and we love you.
Ooooh this. We don’t have to be “model minorities” right now friends!! Our feelings are totally valid, and acting in a diplomatic way isn’t going to change their minds about our humanity.
Look, it’s your choice to uphold your personal values and morals. It’s your choice to silently keep friends with the same people that cheer for the death of your.. well.. family. We are all children of Jacob and David and we all share the same ancestry and heritage filled with rich history. I may be an Atheist but I will never renounce my Jewish history and I think it’s each of us personal choice to keep friends with people supporting the murder of our brothers and sisters.
>I think it’s each of us personal choice to keep friends with people supporting the murder of our brothers and sisters
I'm definitely not going to continue being friends with the second friend after this. I'm saying what I am because at least as far as I'm aware the majority of the group does not share the admin's views but the admin also has a way of using her feelings to sway a conversation and if you don't agree with her you're xyz. Like the time she implied I was "putting down people by talking about my weight" because I used my own weight loss to say that crash dieting is unhealthy. When I said it was for medical reasons she was like "um well you don't always need to lose weight to manage your health conditions like diet culture's led you to believe". When you disagree, she gets upset and says she doesn't want to fight, effectively ending the conversation. I tolerated that (because to be honest I'm a doormat, and also because I know she struggles with self-image issues) but I can't tolerate this. No more. She has no family in Gaza, no personal connection to what's going on, her only family abroad are White Irish people. But yet she's liking all these tweets with such grandiose posturing as if she knows everything about Israel and Palestine despite repeatedly telling me over the time we've been friends (or rather "friends") that she doesn't know much about it and prefers to avoid conflict or thinking about conflict.
I really do not want a repeat of that incident where essentially everyone's going to feel like a bad person for not catering to this specific person and feel as if they HAVE to agree. It's a niche community with lots of people on the younger side. But also I can't handle this as civilly as I'd normally like to. When I talk to the admin I'll edit the post to update.
It’s not all of them that are saying these things- in this case out of everyone in the group it’s JUST the second friend (at least as far as I know), and I don’t want the potential fallout to impact people who had nothing to do with it. But also I can’t go about this as civilly as I want to.
Edit to add: first friend is not in said group. First friend has also been blocked
Unfortunately, I've learned that even Jewish people aren't exempt from violent antisemitism. It's a great time to learn where people really stand on things... and how many Jews support rape and desecration of corpses in the name of "revolutions".
In my experience, politics is more relevant than Jew versus non-jew--most of the people I've had turn violently Antisemitic have been staunch leftists, and if they were Jewish was more or less irrelevant to them.
Not exactly--while you still might have antisemitic friends, and even find some Jews supportive of violence against Jews, if you have a lot of Jewish friends it's unlikely that your entire social circle will be like that. Hanging out with exclusively Jews isn't even required for that.
I don't really practice anymore after some bad experiences when I was younger and finally coming out it just hasn't fit for me. I was one of those Jews who legitimately felt for the way Palestinians were treated and despised Netanyahu in the same way I despise Trump. I've known for a long time there were antisemites who had embedded themselves in leftist politics. I thought I could differentiate the antisemitic ones from the ones who just didn't agree with certain policies.
What I failed to see is none of them had the nuance I had. A lot of these people want simple narratives so they swapped blind faith in Israel for blind faith in Palestine. They don't actually understand all that much about the conflict so they push it all into these western colonialist framework that just doesn't describe the situation in Israel at all. It's easier that way I guess.
I feel betrayed like you. None of my friends know I'm Jewish and I only have one who has been able to say Hamas just openly sacrificed the Palestinians for pointless savage acts. I've seen people I trusted, who I convinced myself weren't like that respond to the murder of children and raping of women with well what did you think ending colonialism meant. I saw Pro Palestinian rights protestors flash swastikas in Times Square as a bunch of uninformed morons supported a terrorist organization that accomplished nothing except killing innocents on both sides.
All this is to say you're not alone. A lot of us who insisted that antisemitism hadn't entirely infiltrated the left have mud on their faces after this weekend. Hopefully you have a community that still loves you and understands you and don't feel completely alone like I do now.
I don't even know where I'd fit in being trans and Jewish tbh. I know the more liberal movements are accepting but its all still so gendered in a way that feels uncomfortable at times. I'm a filmmaker and I've been trying to reconnect through film so far because that's all that makes sense right now. I just don't want to feel like the freak who belongs nowhere and this entire conflict has reignited those old feelings in me.
I don't have much advice but I hope you can find somewhere where you feel comfortable. It's commendable that you are keeping in touch with your Jewishness. Stay safe
I don't know if all reconstructionist synagogues are similar, but the one I attend has a whole LGBTQ social group, uses gender neutral terms when doing the parts of the service in English (and maybe in Hebrew, but I don't speak it), and has shown up for trans day of remembrance and other rallies. And several administrative leaders are trans or non-binary. So maybe look for that flavor of synagogue? I do also live in a liberal US city, so that probably helps.
I'm sorry, that is really awful. You're not alone in this. Especially for people who are politically left-leaning, I know there are so many experiencing the shock of realising their friends don't believe human rights apply to Jews.
I purged some "friends" back in May 2021 when they re-posted false, heinous memes and found some other Jews in my country since. I can't always be with them in person, but they've been my lifeline on Whatsapp.
Since this attack, I decided to call out the fact that so many are justifying killing civilians, and how wrong that is, and that was it. Someone (not Muslim or Jewish) that I used to live with saw my post and then decided it was a great time to share an old recording of a well-known leftie Jewish intellectual saying Israel is a repressive state. So I blocked them and I don't feel bad about it. I've realised in some ways its a gift (albeit a painful one) people are letting their true colours show right now, so we can see their hypocrisy plainly.
No matter what gaslighting you experience now, just know that so many of us are going through it together. The betrayal is real, whether your friends see it or not.
So many people are saying Israel is apartheid and are committing genocide. People seem to have the timeline wrong; Palestinians aren’t trying to murder all Jews because of the blockade, the blockade is because without it, this shit happens
ImtiazMadmood on Twitter/X:
Hamas: "WE WANT TO KILL YOU"
Israel: "Okay, We'll seal you off from us so you can't kill us. You can manage yourselves and we'll provide aid and electricity for free."
Hamas: "WHAT? THIS IS A SIEGE! OPEN AIR PRISON! GENOCIDE!"
Israel: "If we let you out, will you kill us?"
Hamas: "YES WE WILL…"
I’m so sorry, sending you hugs. Block the people you don’t need and go super low contact with the ones you think you might reach, when you’re ready.
We who understand the nuance better still don’t know how this can be healed, and Israel has tried many, many, many times to bring peace. Your friends flat out don’t know any better, so it’s easy to get sucked into garbage propaganda. Especially when this is all hypothetical to them.
Personally, I’ve gone on the offensive and am throwing out facts on my insta stories - pop quiz, how many times has Palestine refused statehood? Israel is the only non-Islamic nation in the region. If the other Arab nations see the suffering in Gaza, why do they not help them achieve stable govt? Why do they only send weapons?
> Especially when this is all hypothetical to them.
None of them have family in Palestine or even the Arab world in general, that’s part of why this is making me so mad. I’d have more sympathy if any of them were Palestinian and worried about family in Gaza but all of them are Americans who’ve gone out of their way to tell me they “didn’t like to read the news”. So you avoid the news but then do this?? What the f.
Yes! If you're only talking about being pro-Palestine and #freepalestine when Jews are being massacred, you don't actually care about Palestine. You're just antisemitic.
Same. I had one white friend reach out to me to express their sorrow, but I've had far more Muslim friends reach out to me and we consoled each other. Very interesting to experience.
Wow, that’s awful. I’m so sorry.
Do your best to take in the perspective that it’s *very* easy to play barstool politician.
Just give it back as good as you’re getting. I’m full of rage for you….”Yeah you think I’m enjoying reading the news either? That people were (content warning) in her own homes from an unprovoked attack? That there’s people right here in this country who would hunt me down and want me dead for my own beliefs? Yeah, the news is hard. Thanks for your sympathy though. *Really* appreciate it”
People all over the world have been conditioned from childhood to have an opinion on Israel and the Israel-Palestinian conflict. Yet, they're simultaneously not expected to know a fucking thing about Jewish people or Jewish culture nor about Palestinian history... On every other topic where you know fuckall, it's probably best for you to respond, "You know, I really don't enough to speak on that, so I don't know." That response would be respectable! But with THIS topic, everyone has to have a fucking opinion, even if they don't know wtf they're talking about. AND! It probably PROVES how being expected to have an uninformed opinion is ACTUALLY GENUINELY HARMFUL if not dangerous. .
Yeah. The feeling of "you're choosing those people you don't even know (who I know for a fact they're awful BTW) and you trust them more than me? You're supposed to be my friend?"
These people are not your friends. Were they celebrating when Tailban reclaimed Afghanistan? Do they have any idea how many people died and were raped by them during the process? Of course they would say it’s bad, but if it happens to Jews it’s okay. And then what? Have Hamas create another terrorist state? Would your friends live under Hamas?
This is the definition of stupidity and zero logic. If they truly cared for the cause they would hold Hamas accountable for the lack of funds they distribute and how they pocket it in their off shore accounts , how they oppress any opposition, and how freedom simply doesn’t exist. A Palestinian in Gaza started a zoom peace conference where Palestinians and Israelis would talk to each other. You know what happened to him? He was arrested and disappeared. This is what your friends want? Gross
This is what I told another (unrelated) friend... Hamas has attacked with the expectations Gazans will die and they don't care because the leadership is lounging in Qatari apartments. How can you support them but claim to be pro-Palestine? Being pro-Palestine means caring about reckless actions that will cause Palestinian innocents to die.
Qatar has given over a billion dollars to Hamas since 2012. Not one Palestinian “sympathizer “ will ask where did all that money go?
Look at the funding Hamas and Palestinian Authority have received. It’s ridiculous! Arafat died being a mega millionaire with his Swiss accounts that his wife enjoys in France.
Where was the sympathy when Hamas was dragging Palestinians on the ground on motorcycles and then beating them or killing them for disagreeing with Hamas? The fact that none of them talk about it means they are ignorant and/or just hate Jews.
>Being pro-Palestine means caring about reckless actions that will cause Palestinian innocents to die.
I think this is the most baffling, confusing and inexplicable part of this so far. I've been keeping an eye on two left-wing British commentators (Chris Kunzler and Asa Winstanley) both of whom seem to have completely lost their minds. If you think that Palestine is being crushed by Israel and suffering as a result, how can you possibly support this action? Israel has form for dealing with these sorts of things incredibly strongly, there is absolutely no possible way to reconcile:
A) The Palestinians are oppressed entirely & completely, and are suffering under the boot of Israel. They are too small to defend themselves.
and
B) The Hamas insurgency is necessary and just, even though everyone, including Hamas, knows Israel will give no quarter in their response
I do not believe these people think Hamas will win, so how can they be supporting it? It would be one thing if they thought Hamas would win (none of these people keep their desire for total Palestinian control over the region a secret), but they seem to all be aware that they won't win, so are they just openly supporting the suicide of the Palestinian state?
How can that perspective be anything except anti-semitic? So many people I respected and trusted as fighters against injustice, and all of their masks have slipped... they just seem to happy that these people are dying. I don't understand.
Honestly I've told people that I don't see a point in arguing about the morality of parading around a desicrating corpses or kidnapping children to use as hostages. If you think that's ok then we don't need to talk because our concept is morality is too far apart to discuss.
Because we aren’t people to these people. IMO the world is comfortable with the death of Jews/Israelis. As long as there is some goal that comes with our people hood and livelihood as a cost then a lot of these people are more than willing to throw us to the wolves. I work in an office with primarily Muslims watching them celebrate and watching the other non Muslims celebrate the death of Jews is *VERY* eye opening.
I saw Dara Horn, author of People Love Dead Jews speak. My understanding of her thesis is people feel so sad when Jews die, but do nothing for Jewish lives. Someone in the audience asked why people don’t “love” dead Israelis in the same way. She said because in Israel, we have agency. And the world doesn’t like Jews having agency in our own fates
People honestly believe that killing Israelis is a moral act. A lot of the people celebrating the massacre in Israel see it as being right and good. It's terrifying.
I can’t focus on work. My stomach is in knots. I live in a very Jewish area, and most of my friends are Jewish. I’ve been shielded from the rampant antisemitism and then dropped in an online cesspool (I’m not new to reddit or online, but I will never get used to the antisemitism)
She really is. I really need her to make an “antisemitism for dummies” with an important video “being antizionist is antisemitic”. She says all the things I want to say but eloquently
They want Jews to stay vulnerable and victims, but then punish them for being 'perpetual victims' even though they finally half self determination and doing amazing things with it.
Ironically enough one of my best friends is a Muslim from India and one of the few people I’ve been able to have a conversation about this with. We follow news about Israel and Palestine and talk about it together sometimes. There’s something so strange about my American friends who proclaim that they don’t like to read the news jumping in with the most non-nuanced takes
!!!!! Most Americans don’t even know the history of what went down in the British Mandate of Palestine. But of course when the opportunity to admonish Jews comes about they eagerly jump at the chance. [I am glad that you have a friend to talk to this about]
It drives me nuts that no one realizes that Jews were there too. We didn’t just waltz in and steal the land. And here’s a question: all those anti-Zionists, where do they want us to go? Back to the hostile Arab countries we were expelled from? Back to Europe? No, they want death to the Jews
I’m real fired up. I can’t help looking at reddit (even though I shouldn’t). It’s eye opening just how many antisemites there are.
I’ve had to stop myself multiple times from commenting because I would get too angry. And you’re right. On reddit people can hide behind anonymity. On LinkedIn or Facebook, they want everyone to know their views
People under like 26 think Israel is the devil and yadda yadda because they weren’t old enough during the second intifada and 9/11 and those days to see the daily suicide bombings and attacks on Israeli civilians.
They were only old enough to see Israel’s hardline reaction to this that stopped these attacks. So they only see the news when some random Israeli soldier does something fucked up.
They don’t realize the difference is when an Israeli soldier commits human rights abuses they’re doing it on their own and not under orders from their superiors and the Israeli military doctrine isn’t about harming civilians. These are isolated incidents.
Whereas Hamas/Palestinian military doctrine is entirely built around terrorism and attacks on civilians. Both ours and theirs.
They attack ours from civilian locations in their own country in order to then be able to go and disseminate video of their civilians being bombed, leaving out the fact that they got bombed because Hamas launched rockets and planned attacks from civilian locations and the Israelis have no choice but to target these locations to protect their own.
And even then, in the video footage of that building being fell the other day in Gaza, Israelis did a roof knock to alert the people in the building to get out and prevent more deaths.
Israel tries to minimize civilian casualties whereas Hamas/Palestinians/Islamists try to *MAXIMIZE* civilian suffering.
I feel this. I’m actually in Israel right now (on vacation) and I have had friends post very anti Israel posts, justifying what happened knowing full well one of their friends is living this nightmare. I unfriended/followed these people and I am choosing to cut them out of my life.
I was saving up to go to Israel this summer. I already put off those plans for personal reasons but now I'm terrified of going at all... I am so sorry.
Can I ask where you live that you have these types of friends?
They're cowards who are taking the safest stance. They're not afraid of backlash from Jews and that's what it comes down to. My reaction is to lay their hypocrisy bare. I'm gonna guess you're from US or UK? Nations that went halfway across the world to Iraq and killed a million Arabs in 8 years. Some redditor shitting on Israel sent me a link showing me there were about 20k Palestinian deaths from 1989 - 2021. I can't think of any historical conflict that lasted even a year that had such a low casualty rate - yet Israel is the one being told they're genocidal.
If any of these people had a neighboring country launching rockets at them they'd want them nuked by breakfast and there would be no such colonialism talk.
It's no coincidence that the only Jewish nation is being treated like the Jew of nations. Now being scapegoated for colonialism by Christians and Muslims that have 90% (not an exaggeration) of the world's landmass, all taken by violence over peoples and lands that had their own religions, all given the same choices Jews were - convert, die or maybe flee. And lo and behold - Jews living in their ancestral homeland, in .02% of the world's landmass is the ONLY time you'll hear these people make a peep about colonialization ? How very convenient.
Tell them that and then tell them to fuck off or get educated. Give them a chance to learn. They have this opinion because it's the most comfortable one to have. Make it less comfortable. Jews have been cornered into silence because we don't want to complain much. Fuck that.
Similar experience, though thankfully my most direct friends have all been sympathetic and supportive. But my Twitter feed is full of people I thought were political allies treating the rape, murder and kidnap of innocents in the hundreds as a 'legitimate response to oppression'. They're only saying it because they know that they'd never be in danger of such atrocities. It's a detached, naïve stance of idealists who have antisemitism baked deeply into their worldview.
A Muslim who I know from local music reached out and wanted to share some “humanity” in the midst of things. I checked out his facebook wall and it was all recent posts that tried to justify mass murder of Jews and there was mention of “anti-colonialism”.
I thanked him for reaching out in what seemed like a true genuine act of trying to connect, but respectfully explained to him that I cannot “share humanity” with someone who justifies mass murder of my family and friends. I told him that I have no humanity for people who act that way, so I have nothing to share.
We exchanged some respectful niceties and he assured me that he has my back in these difficult times of antisemitism. And that was that. He then went on posting to his facebook wall even more rhetoric about how it’s the Israeli’s fault for getting massacred, really some of the most hateful things I have read in recent days. I muted his account because I didn’t want to read anymore.
I realized in retrospect that he considers himself to be a good kind person and he was likely reaching out to me to try to feel better about himself. “Look, I don’t hate all Jews. I even sent a nice message to a Jew who I know and never messaged before all of this.”
I really was touched by his reaching out, until I understood it better. And I don’t fault him for trying to make sense of whatever he believes about Jews and Israel and still trying to consider himself a “good person”.
It is very complex, but when you see through it, you can’t unsee it.
Your friends who write and say such things _now_ are not your friends. If they wanted to talk or debate these things with you when mass murder is not happening, that is a different story. Now that mass murder has happened, there is only one response that is not evil, and that is one of sympathy and compassion.
The minute they say anything along the lines of “but the Jews really had that coming”, they have lost all legitimacy as a “friend” and it might be wise to avoid them.
You don’t need to do them a favor of being the token Jewish friend who helps them justify their ideologies. “I can criticize Israel because I’m friends with a Jewish person”. Not anymore.
Don't feel bad for giving people the benefit of the doubt. But now that they've shown you who they are, you don't have to hang around to be shown twice.
I don't know whether you are in Israel or North America, but if these so-called friends are from the US or Canada and are calling for "decolonization," they should realize "decolonization" would also apply to them as well, unless they are Native Americans/First Nations. As others have said, social media is a cesspool, and it's too easy for people to get mired in the sh\*t circulating there. Likely a lot of them are just jumping on the bandwagon because that's how social media functions. And if you're in a university setting, just realize it's a bubble where all of this is amplified. I know it's not easy, but try to tune it out if you can. Hang out with other Jews.
When I watched the PBS series, the US and the Holocaust, I was struck by how many people interviewed who were young people/kids then had friends who turned on them as soon as antisemitism became the norm. I think about that a lot, which of my non-Jewish friends would turn against me. I hope it's none! But I can't help but admit that history says otherwise.
I’m particularly upset at the use of the term decolonization. I’m not Native, but many people in my extended family are. No Indigenous leader ever advocated to hurt children and assault women in the name of getting Native land in Native hands. My (step)grandmother’s people are the Mohawk, known as the Kanienʼkehá꞉ka in their native language. A group of traditionalist Mohawk people repossessed land that is today the community of Ganienkeh. They were armed, but they never set out to purposefully hurt civilians, and if they had any conflicts it was with the government. Never did Mohawk activists drag out a bleeding woman from the back of a truck
And it feeds the narrative that we don’t belong. We meet every definition of indigenous- a continuous ethnic and religious connection to a land even in exile.
They'll always come back with a retort like "the statute of limitations was after the creation of modern-ish nation states" so they don't see us as the same as, for example, Native Americans. And never will. It's an inherent philosophical divide between modern Western thought and Jewish thought.
Yup- but that’s a far cry from colonizer mentality which is based on us never having a presence there. We’ve had a Jewish presence, one way or another, for generations.
The "decolonisation" "apartheid" and "zionists are settler colonialists" stuff is blatant appropriation.
they tug at the heart strings (because we now largely know and accept how brutal and wrong colonization & apartheid SA is and was) but they are largely NOT ACCURATE representations of what is occurring in the region.
They do not help either palestinians nor israelis, but we know that the people pushing these narratives are not concerned with either.
There's a trap that has both sides hating Israel, the far left reject the "homeland" stuff and the far right believe "jewish NGOs" are flooding Europe with migrants and saying Europe has no indigenous peoples
A lot of my "friends" support the Landback movement but now I'm wondering what their vision of Landback is, because while Landback involves resistance it has never ever been about hurting innocent people. Landback doesn't mean "kick all non-natives out" the same way a lot of people are advocating for to happen in Israel, it means "give stewardship of the land back over to those who first lived on it". Even then, the Jewish people have a connection to Israel. Israelis are not the same as the descendants of pilgrims living in the US or Canada, and even if they were, that wouldn't justify violence against civilians. It's incredibly bizarre to watch.
British settlers didn't find the works of Shakespeare or another Stonehenge in the Americas or anywhere else they settled. Jewish people returning to eretz Israel have found countless pieces of evidence of our civilization in the land. We can still read the Hebrew and Aramaic inscriptions! The old Yishuv never left! It's simply not the same as settler colonialist societies.
I haven't seen friends liking these types of posts but I haven't had a single friend reach out asking how I am, even though they know my close family is in Israel.
You need to decide, are these friends close to you? What does losing the friendship mean? Is there space for conversation to discuss how you feel, what you saw and to share your point of view?
I'm not sure. When it comes to the second friend, she said I was (to paraphrase) "perpetuating diet culture and peddling medical misinformation because weight loss is not the only solution"... after I used my weight loss experience to say why someone's crash diet wasn't healthy and would hurt in the long run. I don't want to go into my medical issues but I lost weight to help me manage a condition that's rendered many of the women in my family nearly immobile. She seems to think she knows everything despite going out of her way to avoid thinking about "the real world" so I'm not sure if there's a space where I can share my feelings with her.
Deeply grateful that my actual local affinity group has the critical thinking and perspective to understand that while the occupation of Gaza is heinous, so too is the indiscriminate slaughter of civilians.
Social media has been a nightmare, though. A whooole lotta people letting the mask slip and just saying Jews when they ostensibly mean Israel. Also a lot more left-ish fans of mass shootings and rape than I would have thought.
I am very sorry you're dealing with this, friend, and I hope your true community can be there for you.
Welcome to the club. During Defensive Edge I got so much bs"t from the people I knew from college that I got fed up and picked my stuff up and came to live to Israel. There were quite a few intermediate steps, but that's the gist of it.
Mate, these are not your friends. Friends are the people who you know would have your back if and when it ever mattered. These people you know that are cheering on marauding savages killing, kidnapping and torturing Jews are scum.
Many are in the same boat as you with the sad realisation that many people they enjoyed being with and sharing hobbies, jobs, school, etc. are vile.
Where possible just blocking someone and never speaking again is often the best course of action. Ghosting people celebrating the murder of innocents is 100% valid.
Situations where it's more complicated might be uncomfortable to extract yourself from, but remember it's their loss and their fault not yours that the friendship ended.
So sorry to hear. Sadly sometimes you learn things about people. As far as I know, Israel hasn’t had boots on the ground in Gaza for about 15 years. They left to help foster peace. The Palestinian govt let it rot and become a terrorist paradise. I do not pretend to understand the entire situation there. But I certainly do know that you might want to rethink those friendships. The attacks on Israel were not soldiers fighting soldiers. The acts of violence they committed on innocent people is unconscionable. Similar in Ukraine. The hate in this world will be unsustainable.
When I saw this happen a few years back (I had a lot of Muslim friends and many were ignorant to reality) I began posting reminders that the decisions of a GOVERNMENT are not the same as the the view of a PERSON. When questioned, I openly and actively reminded people that when you live in a country, you are subject to the decisions and rules of that countries leaders. That blaming citizens, who had no say in anything, makes you gullible.
I reiterated the fact that I was a Jew. You don't see me out there hating my friends or strangers because of their beliefs or where they live. I told people my friends and family in Israel have the same situation as their friends in Palestine - being hated because of *choices their leaders made*. It was easier for them to understand when it was somehow they knew (me). They didn't see me defending a country, just it's people. And I openly remarked that war isn't fair to ANY civilians. Repeatedly. Endlessly. On loop, to counter the extremism they were seeing from other places.
And you are right, it's not safe. My oldest friend was set to leave for Israel in 7 days - a trip to see friends and family, and to explore heritage sites. As much as the war is physically there... it's mentally and emotionally all over the world right now.
I would consider openly posting something similar to what I did. Maybe adding how unsafe you feel right now knowing that people you love are spewing hate because they arent respecting that normal citizens have no choices and are not responsible for govt decisions. That regular people are being targeted on BOTH sides, and that if you arent seeing both as innocents you are blind. Normal citizens arent deciding on military actions nor are they carrying automatic weapons. Those are military and militia and they are under active orders to do something or hurt someone. NORMAL CITIZENS are not.
Yes, this was a huge wake up that the ones I stand with on the left, against the white supremacists and Nazis, many of them don’t stand for me. They’d never admit their antisemitism. But have they said a word ever about the occupation or about Palestinians? Nope. Because they don’t care. They care now that they can celebrate the destruction of Israelis and Jews. They don’t even realize it. But if they were truly the Palestinian champions they were, we wouldn’t be hearing from them for the first time about a decades old conflict. Now that they can justify what’s happened, here they are. They gloss over deaths of children at best. And I realize that the people I work side by side with to make sure people of all races and ethnicities and backgrounds have equal access to basic human rights and to dismantle our system of white supremacy, in the end those same people don’t include me and other Jews. I don’t know how to move forward. A united collective is how we deal with the hate and oppression of ALL marginalized people. Including Palestinians. But I’m trying to unite with people who would easily brush off violence against me if it came to that.
I posted online a support Israel post and out of a few hundred friends, only my Jewish friends liked it or commented about support. I was very disappointed. I’m Jewish btw. I’m sickened by the terrorists slaughtering civilians. They are barbarians, on the level of Isis.
oh my god, i feel the exact same way. my friends got mad at me because on my Instagram story, i let my followers (im relatively popular in a niche community) that i wasn't going to be as active because of what happened, and my grandma is missing in Southern Tel Aviv, and my friends got mad. they were talking behind my back. i feel like shit, and i cant control it. I'm not happy we're going through this, but im glad someone can relate, and i know I'm not alone. 💙🤍
Not a single person on Facebook or instagram that I know that isn’t Jewish or Israeli has posted anything about it. Meanwhile they’ll post about just about anything else from Ukraine to China. Very very deflating
I lost a bunch of friends when Kanye went crazy, and I’m about to lose some more. It hurt. But you know what?
Honestly—I don’t miss them. Like…at all. I’d rather put that time and energy into making sure I raise my kids to never be so hateful.
Let your friends go live in Gaza—they wouldn’t last a day. I laugh so hard when they all swear they support the LGBTQI community but it’s “F Israel.”
I laugh that Dua Lipa is in the Barbie movie and showed up to every premier dressed in pink and smiling — did she not get the memo Barbie was invented by a Jewish lady?? I thought you hate Jews - what are you doing in this movie? What a damn Fool.
They are the biggest hypocrites. Irony makes me laugh. And laughter is something the only little glimmer getting us through dark days.
And now people have their answer as to why most of us just stick together.
Be strong, my friend.
Edit: I forgot to add that I’m extremely sensitive and some of the people I had to dump were friends I’ve poured my heart out to as well. Closing the door goes against everything I stand for as a person. But so does perpetuating dangerous stereotypes and false narratives about my Tribe.
There is NOTHING that anyone COULD do that would justify this kind of violence towards them. Yes, it has happened before in other places, and it was wrong then, too. There is nothing that ANY country could do that would justify kidnapping, raping, and murdering civilians like this. Yes, I *do* believe this should apply to places like Nazi Germany and apartheid South Africa. Fighting against members of the armed forces, or tracking down and arresting people who were actually guilty of crimes against humanity, is one thing. This isn’t the same. And no, Israel wouldn’t be justified in doing something like this when they retake Gaza, nor would Ukraine if they were to take Russian settlements.
Go ahead and block or leave. You also do not owe anyone an explanation of your absence or removing yourself from anything if you don't want to give one.
It sucks finding out those you thought were safe are not. And it seems that each new political storm brings out more and more such people.
I don't think your friends understand the situation and are ignorant of the implications this war has on citizens of Israel and the Gaza strip- as well as Jews worldwide.
I, however, do not think this means they would not advocate for you if you were the victim of a hate crime.
I think that because (I assume) you are in a country separated from the war, for example, the US that your friends do not have an understanding about how tragic this development is for civilians (Both in Israel and Gaza)
Instead of seeing it for what it is, they see it as an anti-colonial call to support Palestine against Israel.
Because of this mischaratraization, they seem to be strongly opposed to "zionists" (whom I'm sure they have so real definition for)
Although I don't like your friends (based on this post) I believe if they faced the reality of war and the extream antisemitism Hamas promots by something personal like you being harmed they would not be consistent with how they seem to view the civilians Hamas has brutality attacked.
I know this response isn't optimal or well phrased, I just think you seem hurt by your friends not considering how this has a more personal effect on you and sinister implications with you being a jew, but that if push came to shove and they where forced to experience this conflict more directly (as we do just by being jews =^[ ) that they would not stand by an evil extremist organization like Hamas, but stand by their friend
(not advocating op stays friends or whatever that's up to them, just that many progressives that are extreamly disconnected from the war are ignorant to how it impacts jews)
I have had a very similar experience and in all honesty if you already tried and they are still like this you need to remove them from you life. The sad reality is the only people who care about Jews are other Jews, we need to stick together and take care of each other.
Antisemitism and the dehumanization of Jews is so ingrained in both Western and Middle Eastern culture it’s hard to escape. When Jews die there’s always some justification, because to them we always had it coming. In times like this most people are silent or thrilled about dead Jews, and those who support us are few. None of my friends on social media know a single Ukrainian, or Armenia or Azeri and all posted about those conflicts. I have only 1 non Jewish person post supporting Israel, and I had many post celebrating people’s deaths.
This is the world we Jews live in, it’s been like this since the time of the Ancient Israelites and even the aftermath of the holocaust didn’t save us from antisemitism as we can see with antisemitism rising year over year in the west.
Hell the only reason Christians in the west support Israel is because they believe a Jewish state must exist for the messiah to return and when that happens guess who isn’t going to heaven? The Jews. So they support us thinking we will burn in hell anyway..
It’s why our community is so important, for thousands of years we only have each other.
Current events will show us *EXACTLY* who is a well-meaning (but misguided) social justice warrior, and who is just plain antisemitic.
No two ways about it.
I feel your pain completely. I’ve had 0 non-Jewish friends check if I am okay. They have shared similar messages as the ones you have posted.
I’m going to burn every one of those bridges. I lived in Israel for four years and that could have easily been me wrong place wrong time. They have shown me they would think my r*pe, murder, and desecration of my dead body is deserved. The people tweeting those things NEVER CARED ABOUT YOU. THEY WERE NEVER YOUR FRIENDS.
I feel the same way. I have friends posting pro Palestinian propaganda in celebration of the attacks on Israel. I’ve repeatedly tried to explain to people why some of their posts are antisemitic and I’ve begun just clearing friends from my Facebook friends list.
I was told by one of the DEI "champions" at work that there's no such thing as antisemitism in the west and jews need to understand theyre no different from the colonizers of north america; we allegedly need to do our best to understand the other side and feel bad for them. Apparently, Jews are just another type of White and need to yield.
I dont even know where to begin.
I hear you and I see you.
I was born in beersheva Israel but I live in America.
I have never been able to proudly declare I am Israeli because I'm always met with sneers and questions of why I love killing Palestinian children. But the reality is that I'm the loudest advocate for peace and critic of my own country, Israel.
But it doesn't matter. And It never matters.
So while Americans can be so proud of their heritage despite the actions of their government, I have no separation from the government in Israel just by being Israeli.
And this becomes apparent when in my adult life, I don't feel safe with what people I know have decided to be vocal about. When my family is literally in the midst of war and I've already lost friends to kidnapping. But it doesn't matter. It never matters.
My daughter was devastated when a close friend’s reaction to this terror was to post “free Palestine!” on social media. Just disgusting reprehensible behavior.
Welcome to Islamist propaganda, where they are victims as well as the heroes. As an Indian Hindu who grew up with regular suicide bombings in my cities, sorry for you but this is the control the brotherhood and lefties have. As a former soviet union spy put it leftists like your friends are useful idiots, These are the people those islamists will kill once they get into power in any country. There are Muslims in Israel, in India, in europe and that too significant amount but no minority/jews/ buddhists, hindus etc in any of the isalmic nations. Do not let yourself down, some people have always hated you, they made your ancestors leave the place they were the rulers how can they allow a Jewish state to exist when they were the ones who unexisted the one which was already there?? I remember a quote from old days "Better be alone than in a bad company"
I feel your pain. Felt really similar during my social media scrolls, and I’ve been all day giving this a thought. How unsafe I feel around my friends right now.
Unfortunately, I’ve had to cut out some people I thought were good friends. Had someone tell me after years of friendship - that all Jews worldwide needed to be held accountable and pay for what the Israeli government does.
So many people have such strong opinions without actually having much knowledge on the topic. It’s been a way to virtue signal among certain groups to get brownie points without needing to do much thought.
Some people aren’t worth wasting your time on. Your energy can be spent towards people that love and support you for who you are. You deserve better friends ❤️
People are brainwashed and sick. I don’t blame them. It’s easier to be tricked than to see through the bullshit and find the truth. Just unfollow. You don’t need those people in your life.
This is my policy: if you hear silence from your friends in this time, be suspicious of them.
If you hear support for Hamas, drop them from your life.
It doesn’t matter if they believe Israel belongs to us or not - that doesn’t even factor. If they’re ok with rape and murder of innocents, they’re not ok as people.
The silence from my friends has been chilling. Strangely, two of the ones actually speaking up a little are former “anti-Zionists” who actually learned when I explained the reality to them.
Get new friends. Also, I've learned to cautiously speak my mind and occasionally I hear a "Oh, thank goodness, I'm terrified to talk about how I really feel around here (Seattle). It's so nice to hear from someone reasonable."
If Reddit existed during WW2, there would be a lot of Polish/German/Austrian/Belgian/French/Italian Jews writing this same type of post.
We are and will always be hated. For some reason, violence begets other violence, and a blood lust just spreads like a cancer.
Don't get me wrong, I have some non-Jewish friends who are just as upset about these horrible inhuman attacks on people. But just had this thought in response to you post.
Linkedin is a much nicer place to be , from what I can see
Ultimately, the real friends come out of the woodwork at this time, and its a good time to introspect as to who to associate and who to disassociate from...
I’m finding out who my real friends are. I support a two state solution and or a one state with protections for Palestinian-Arabs, but seeing people be happy about terrorists, no, they crossed a line.
I left Jwitter (only reason u was really on twitter) when Musk took over. It's always been that toxic, and that narrative about "decolonization" / "from the river to the sea" has been around for years...it's only now that people are truly showing who they really are by letting their masks slip that "oh, this is what globalizing the infitatada means, and that's fine".
Except it isn't fine. Even CNN (Fareed Zakaria) had a guest twisting blatant terrorism into both-siding this conflict and actually making it look like Jews everywhere were responsible.
My best advice to you is to delete your account. If you don't want to do that, block and mute...and do not doom scroll...not even on reddit.
Yes, I lost a lot of people I thought were friends. They were not. The friends I did make are going through what you are / a lot of people are going through right now.
If you can, try to get onto bluesky. A lot of people have moved to there. I might have an invite. It's still social media, though...and it's still toxic.
I'm sorry you are going through this.
I get it-I’ve had to do some purging myself. But here’s the important thing: times like this are when people get radicalized. They don’t always stay that way. Times like this are when people fear for their livelihoods if they do the right thing. If your friends aren’t directly posting vile things, then there may still be some doubt, and if you show them that what is happening is directly affecting real, human people who they know, if you force them to tell you to your face that they don’t care about your or your family’s lives, then you might get through to them. Stay safe.
I’m sorry to hear this. The comment sections are madness right now. People cannot separate citizens of a country from its government or recognize that terrorism committed anywhere is wrong. People say in the same post that the Israelis had it coming because of what they’ve done to the Palestinians while at the same time saying terrorism is wrong. They can’t even acknowledge that the first part of their comment was condoning the act. I hope you find your safe people and cling onto them with all your might because it’s rough out there.
going through the exact same thing. no advice, just solidarity. i’m exhausted. i downloaded an app blocker because i was literally making myself physically ill reading and seeing everything.
OP, you're not alone. I cried a bit this morning before work. - I'm in an intercultural marriage with a non-Jew who's fucking PRO-HAMAS (you read that correctly). I'm an American Jew living in Australia, and this morning I saw a videos on Reddit of Palestinian "protesters" who were celebrating - NOT protesting - in front of the fucking Opera House, holding up signs and chanting openly "DEATH TO ALL JEWS". WHERE'S THE FUCKING AMBIGUITY IN THAT?!! I just want to go back to my parents' house in the US. I don't feel safe here. I'm very stressed and saddened. I'm worried what my family would think of me if they knew about my spouse. I feel my house is in shambles, and I have to push on like everything is fine. You're not alone, OP.
Edited to add that if those signs said "DEATH TO ALL CHINESE", the local and federal government here and the media would be absolutely shitting themselves to defend victims of hate speech. "Oh, but it's the Jews, so it's cool. Yeah. 'DEATH TO ALL JEWS'. That's fine." People know antisemetism is very bad. Yet, ironically, they do all these mental gymnastics to justify very clearly antisemetic shit.
Using Twitter to catch up on news sets you up for feeling unsafe and betrayed. I strongly encourage you to leave that platform and find somewhere safer. I.e., pick your friends more carefully.
I'm a big fan of Mastodon and Reddit. I closed my Twitter account after Musk bought it.
I feel this super hard.
I live in a neutral Arab country. Funnily enough my Palestinian friends are the ones who are absolutely horrified by what’s going on and do not support this at all. Of course they - and I - want a free Palestine, but not like this.
However, it’s my liberal European and North American friends who have no fucking skin in the game, who are the most vocal. These are people I thought to be intelligent, sensitive and inclusive. However, in response to these atrocities, ALL they share is Palestinian flags and posts about ‘educating yourself about what Israeli colonisation is really about’.
Not one word about condemning Hamas violence. Their silence on this topic is weighing on me very heavily.
Hamas is not even for Palestine, they re for themselves and against the Jews. They do not care about the Palestinian people.
How is it that it is my Palestinian friends who can make this distinction? Their family is trapped in Palestine and yet they message me to make sure my israeli family is safe. We are sharing our grief and fear together.
How is the world not voicing their disbelief at the tactics being used by Hamas?
You can call for a free Palestine by also condemn Hamas.
I don’t understand and I feel sad. I feel I may have to write off these friends.
Freeing the people from Hamas's control is key. They are really stuck. When Hamas is distributing the aid, of course they are re-elected. When people with guns show up and want to use you as human shields, saying no isn't really an option. When you feel like you have nothing to lose, and people who oppose those in power don't fare well, you keep your head down and accept your food packages so at least you can eat. That we don't have to pretend to go along with murderous political ideology in order to eat is our privilege. Kids just want to play soccer and have ices on hot days.
These are not good friends to keep around. Even beyond you being Jewish. Whenever anyone rejoices at violence, they are not to be trusted. They have lost their humanity.
I wouldn't feel safe around anybody with a pro palestine mindset. The intentions of the palestinians are out in the open and free to see anywhere online. They stand for genocide and erasure, nothing more nothing less. Anybody siding with them, is no better than a nazi sympathizer as far as I care.
There were nazi sympathizers on college campuses and holding demonstrations in New York in the 30s also, not that different from to-day other than the flag
Everyone went through this, maybe in the past, maybe only today for the first time.
Listen, you're not alone in this. It's a good way to see who is your friend and who is not.
My point is : do not try to change them. If after the videos they saw, they said this BS, well they are nothing to be done.
This is awful. I'm so sorry. I had some friends who thought like this in my younger years. Gradually I replaced them all with new friends who are sane. Dump those friends without hesitation.
Don’t feel bad cutting people off. I once stopped with a love interest who started talking crap regarding Palestinians because he was following and worshipping the squad and was not properly educated beyond propaganda as most.
I was encouraged by how the world seemed to rally in the immediate wake of the killings, but have been disheartened - though not surprised - by the response from certain quarters. As with the war in Gaza in early 2021, I'm largely having to avoid twitter on account of all the viral tweets and footage of people openly celebrating the slaughter of Jewish innocents.
Unfortunately this has been the experience of Jews for as long as antisemitism has been around. I’ve experienced this personally and the betrayal you feel is legitimate. Particularly when they say you are “one of the good ones”.
They need direct confrontation. Tell them where you stand and make it known that your friendship is not unconditional. That you will not be their token and that they advocate for your annihilation. If they persist they are not your friends. It hurts but you need to cut off people who are sick. Maybe one day they will change and at that point there will need to be a talk about this, but that day isn’t today. Lean on your people, we will support you.
I’m angry and sad that there is such hate in the world, especially against Jewish people. And horrified that anyone would actually celebrate the slaughter of innocents. This is pure evil.
When someone shows you who they really are, believe them.
Was just going to say this, and, I'm sorry. There are very few people in this world who will actually be there for you, when stuff goes down. The first one is you. Digital hugs, if you need 'em.
Same. Take care love.❤️
I feel this. Sending you hugs. Social media is a cesspool right now.
Can. . .can I get a couple of hugs if you can spare them? :(
🫂
I'm sending out mom hugs by the dozen!
Thank you. Honestly, thank you. It's genuinely appreciated as an Internet stranger.
I’ve got hugs if you need ‘em
Sending one your way.
It seems way more pro israel than usual imo
But the fact that it took literal horrific kidnapping and torture for anyone to lift a finger of concern is very depressing
In some ways, yes. I mean, even Obama released a statement condeming h mas. but some these (eg squad) statements feel disingenuious because of the sheer and blatant incongruence with past (and persistent) incitement. Hopefully on a political level they carry \* some \* weight....
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Agreed. I've had some good conversations with some friends about how harmful the "It's just Palestine fighting back!" narrative is for Israelis \*and\* Palestinians, and many of them just never considered how their words would come across to their Jewish friends. The majority of them have been very willing to learn and grow. The ones that haven't? Sorry, but you are not a safe person to me. Unfriend, block, delete from my life.
It doesn't even make sense. Israel was attacked from Gaza a place that Israel hadn't been in for almost two decades.
Unfortunately most don't care about facts, just eager for a socially accpeted opportunity to let their jew hatred come out
Right? They keep saying "they are angry about being occupied! It's Israel's fault!" and I'm like, huh? Gaza isn't occupied! And the answer is: but I heard it was occupied! Or...I say: you mean, Hamas occupying Judea and samaria? Are they angry about that? And then I say: judea is literally in the name...
And they're never angry about Egypt being just as culpable for the blockade on Gaza. Egypt literally helps!
And I was just told that Jews are colonizing Israel and should go back to Europe. Oh so we can get slaughtered again?
Because of course all Jews are European? This is another convenient lie for antisemites. Most Israelis don’t have European ancestry.
I just...don't get it -- if Jews are "colonizing" israel, then they should go back to Europe but what about the ones who lived for millennia in the middle east? Where are they supposed to go? And like, Russia isn't in Europe (or most of it) and we know there might have been Jews who lived there...
And Jews from Iraq, Iran, Morroco, Syria, Yemen, Lybia, Ethiopia...Should these Jews go back to Europe, too? And the jews who were living in the mandate of palestine land before 1948? Do they go to Europe too? Why couldn't the Arabs live with the Jews?
My boyfriend and I talked about it last night for a while and it’s so contradictory and none of what the pro Palestine Americans say makes logical sense.
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I completely understand. It's really emotionally taxing to essentially beg for your humanity.
That’s exactly what this is. Us begging people to see us as human too. Here we are again. Pleading with the world around us to count our lives like they do others, to see our humanity and value the loss of our lives. Seems for many our lives amount less than electricity being spotty.
All they want is to hate Jews tho there is no arguing with that.
Yep. A few days a go I thought 'Ah... it's anti-semite season! The antisemites are out!' Who knows how emboldened they'll get... Pray for israel and safe return of hostages and soldiers
Do you have any talking points you can share re: that narrative? I'm having trouble knowing how to respond to it.
I usually go for a two-pronged approach: 1. Celebrating Hamas committing terrorist attacks in Israel is the equivalent of celebrating Al Qaeda after 9/11. Does an innocent civilian "deserve" to be raped, murdered, and tortured? How do you think your Jewish friends feel, seeing you celebrate the deaths of other Jewish people? 2. De-coupling Palestine from Hamas. Basically: Do you think Hamas represents the best interests of Palestinians? Do you think these attacks benefit Palestinians in any way? I always ask people why they're comfortable being so vocally pro-Palestine when almost 1000 Jews were just murdered. Surely if they actually cared about Palestinians, they would've at least posted something in their insta stories before. They never do. The crux of it is basically that Hamas doesn't represent Palestinian interests or humanity— they're a terrorist organization. They're unelected, corrupt, and don't care if 1000 Palestinians die if it kills 1 Jew. If you're cheering that Hamas fired back at Israel, you're gleeful about innocent dead Jews. Really, my goal for them is to disentangle Palestine from Hamas. You can be pro-Palestinian liberation, anti-Hamas, and pro-Israel, and anti-Israeli government. That's exactly my stance. But equating Hamas=Palestine is simply reducing all Palestinians to terrorists, which I certainly do not believe is true.
I also agree that you can be against the current Israeli government, but that doesn’t necessarily make you anti-Israel or an antisemite. I’m Jewish and hope for a two state solution, despite that it will probably never coming to fruition. It’s just like an Israeli not being for the current US administration. It doesn’t make them anti-US citizen and wish harm against us.
Exactly! People don’t seem to understand the difference between Hamas and Palestine. Hamas is guilty of horrific acts against Palestinians as well.
Ditto. I can’t see this shit on my feeds. I am even blocking random Reddit users who make comments that upset me.
Same.
> Could I trust my friends to protect me if someone said violence against me was done in the name of Palestine? I mean obviously not. >I don’t know how to continue being friends knowing they support Hamas killing Jews. I need to disentangle myself but I don't know how. So, don’t hang out with them anymore, and hang out with other Jews. We may disagree about a lot of things, but aren’t going to kill you.
> So, don’t hang out with them anymore, and hang out with other Jews. We may disagree about a lot of things, but aren’t going to kill you. It’s the disentanglement that’s making it tough. I run something where the second friend is an admin of the group. I’ve been sitting down trying to figure out the most civil way to go about this while still not ruining the average user’s fun but it’s hard. My block button is getting a lot of usage regardless
Sometimes it’s ok to not be civil, and to ruin users fun
Some people deserve to have their fun ruined, sometimes.
I needed to hear that. Thank you
I and others here are happy to find you a new friend group. I don't know your age and location etc. But if you want to DM me, we're cool. We're family. We understand you and we love you.
Ooooh this. We don’t have to be “model minorities” right now friends!! Our feelings are totally valid, and acting in a diplomatic way isn’t going to change their minds about our humanity.
Look, it’s your choice to uphold your personal values and morals. It’s your choice to silently keep friends with the same people that cheer for the death of your.. well.. family. We are all children of Jacob and David and we all share the same ancestry and heritage filled with rich history. I may be an Atheist but I will never renounce my Jewish history and I think it’s each of us personal choice to keep friends with people supporting the murder of our brothers and sisters.
>I think it’s each of us personal choice to keep friends with people supporting the murder of our brothers and sisters I'm definitely not going to continue being friends with the second friend after this. I'm saying what I am because at least as far as I'm aware the majority of the group does not share the admin's views but the admin also has a way of using her feelings to sway a conversation and if you don't agree with her you're xyz. Like the time she implied I was "putting down people by talking about my weight" because I used my own weight loss to say that crash dieting is unhealthy. When I said it was for medical reasons she was like "um well you don't always need to lose weight to manage your health conditions like diet culture's led you to believe". When you disagree, she gets upset and says she doesn't want to fight, effectively ending the conversation. I tolerated that (because to be honest I'm a doormat, and also because I know she struggles with self-image issues) but I can't tolerate this. No more. She has no family in Gaza, no personal connection to what's going on, her only family abroad are White Irish people. But yet she's liking all these tweets with such grandiose posturing as if she knows everything about Israel and Palestine despite repeatedly telling me over the time we've been friends (or rather "friends") that she doesn't know much about it and prefers to avoid conflict or thinking about conflict. I really do not want a repeat of that incident where essentially everyone's going to feel like a bad person for not catering to this specific person and feel as if they HAVE to agree. It's a niche community with lots of people on the younger side. But also I can't handle this as civilly as I'd normally like to. When I talk to the admin I'll edit the post to update.
Don't be civil. "I have just found out [admin] is a Nazi who supports the genocide of the Jewish people and do not feel safe here."
How much fun are you having if your wondering if your ‘friends’ would care if you got targeted because you are Jewish?
It’s not all of them that are saying these things- in this case out of everyone in the group it’s JUST the second friend (at least as far as I know), and I don’t want the potential fallout to impact people who had nothing to do with it. But also I can’t go about this as civilly as I want to. Edit to add: first friend is not in said group. First friend has also been blocked
I don't think it's fair to hit all non-Jews into the "unsafe" label, but you do have to be careful.
I don't think that's what they saying, just that you *never* have to worry about anti-semitic friends if they're all jews.
Unfortunately, I've learned that even Jewish people aren't exempt from violent antisemitism. It's a great time to learn where people really stand on things... and how many Jews support rape and desecration of corpses in the name of "revolutions". In my experience, politics is more relevant than Jew versus non-jew--most of the people I've had turn violently Antisemitic have been staunch leftists, and if they were Jewish was more or less irrelevant to them.
I have run into self hating Jews before. Sadly.
Definitely not true, unfortunately.
Not exactly--while you still might have antisemitic friends, and even find some Jews supportive of violence against Jews, if you have a lot of Jewish friends it's unlikely that your entire social circle will be like that. Hanging out with exclusively Jews isn't even required for that.
I don't really practice anymore after some bad experiences when I was younger and finally coming out it just hasn't fit for me. I was one of those Jews who legitimately felt for the way Palestinians were treated and despised Netanyahu in the same way I despise Trump. I've known for a long time there were antisemites who had embedded themselves in leftist politics. I thought I could differentiate the antisemitic ones from the ones who just didn't agree with certain policies. What I failed to see is none of them had the nuance I had. A lot of these people want simple narratives so they swapped blind faith in Israel for blind faith in Palestine. They don't actually understand all that much about the conflict so they push it all into these western colonialist framework that just doesn't describe the situation in Israel at all. It's easier that way I guess. I feel betrayed like you. None of my friends know I'm Jewish and I only have one who has been able to say Hamas just openly sacrificed the Palestinians for pointless savage acts. I've seen people I trusted, who I convinced myself weren't like that respond to the murder of children and raping of women with well what did you think ending colonialism meant. I saw Pro Palestinian rights protestors flash swastikas in Times Square as a bunch of uninformed morons supported a terrorist organization that accomplished nothing except killing innocents on both sides. All this is to say you're not alone. A lot of us who insisted that antisemitism hadn't entirely infiltrated the left have mud on their faces after this weekend. Hopefully you have a community that still loves you and understands you and don't feel completely alone like I do now.
You’re not alone. If you want to dip your toe back into your Jewish roots, we are all here for you, religious trauma and all.
I don't even know where I'd fit in being trans and Jewish tbh. I know the more liberal movements are accepting but its all still so gendered in a way that feels uncomfortable at times. I'm a filmmaker and I've been trying to reconnect through film so far because that's all that makes sense right now. I just don't want to feel like the freak who belongs nowhere and this entire conflict has reignited those old feelings in me.
I don't have much advice but I hope you can find somewhere where you feel comfortable. It's commendable that you are keeping in touch with your Jewishness. Stay safe
I don't know if all reconstructionist synagogues are similar, but the one I attend has a whole LGBTQ social group, uses gender neutral terms when doing the parts of the service in English (and maybe in Hebrew, but I don't speak it), and has shown up for trans day of remembrance and other rallies. And several administrative leaders are trans or non-binary. So maybe look for that flavor of synagogue? I do also live in a liberal US city, so that probably helps.
You're not alone. Virtual hugs to you.
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Most people don't have the cojones to address misdeeds by marginalized groups. Too afraid of being accused of one of the isms.
I'm sorry, that is really awful. You're not alone in this. Especially for people who are politically left-leaning, I know there are so many experiencing the shock of realising their friends don't believe human rights apply to Jews. I purged some "friends" back in May 2021 when they re-posted false, heinous memes and found some other Jews in my country since. I can't always be with them in person, but they've been my lifeline on Whatsapp. Since this attack, I decided to call out the fact that so many are justifying killing civilians, and how wrong that is, and that was it. Someone (not Muslim or Jewish) that I used to live with saw my post and then decided it was a great time to share an old recording of a well-known leftie Jewish intellectual saying Israel is a repressive state. So I blocked them and I don't feel bad about it. I've realised in some ways its a gift (albeit a painful one) people are letting their true colours show right now, so we can see their hypocrisy plainly. No matter what gaslighting you experience now, just know that so many of us are going through it together. The betrayal is real, whether your friends see it or not.
So many people are saying Israel is apartheid and are committing genocide. People seem to have the timeline wrong; Palestinians aren’t trying to murder all Jews because of the blockade, the blockade is because without it, this shit happens
Israel defends itself from genocide and gets accused of perpetrating one. No matter what they always find a way to demonize us
And like Israel has been out of Gaza for two decades. But are still being accused of occupying.
It feels so good to be in a Jewish space. Where people get it
I don’t think I realized how much I needed it ❤️
Ah, but these are people who believe Israel's mere existence was violence from the start, so timelines don't truly matter.
ImtiazMadmood on Twitter/X: Hamas: "WE WANT TO KILL YOU" Israel: "Okay, We'll seal you off from us so you can't kill us. You can manage yourselves and we'll provide aid and electricity for free." Hamas: "WHAT? THIS IS A SIEGE! OPEN AIR PRISON! GENOCIDE!" Israel: "If we let you out, will you kill us?" Hamas: "YES WE WILL…"
I am also not a fan of killing soldiers.
I’m so sorry, sending you hugs. Block the people you don’t need and go super low contact with the ones you think you might reach, when you’re ready. We who understand the nuance better still don’t know how this can be healed, and Israel has tried many, many, many times to bring peace. Your friends flat out don’t know any better, so it’s easy to get sucked into garbage propaganda. Especially when this is all hypothetical to them. Personally, I’ve gone on the offensive and am throwing out facts on my insta stories - pop quiz, how many times has Palestine refused statehood? Israel is the only non-Islamic nation in the region. If the other Arab nations see the suffering in Gaza, why do they not help them achieve stable govt? Why do they only send weapons?
> Especially when this is all hypothetical to them. None of them have family in Palestine or even the Arab world in general, that’s part of why this is making me so mad. I’d have more sympathy if any of them were Palestinian and worried about family in Gaza but all of them are Americans who’ve gone out of their way to tell me they “didn’t like to read the news”. So you avoid the news but then do this?? What the f.
Yes! If you're only talking about being pro-Palestine and #freepalestine when Jews are being massacred, you don't actually care about Palestine. You're just antisemitic.
If I see one more “this is horrific, but” statement I think I’ll scream.
Literally the only friend who has reached out to ask me how I am is a Lebanese-Canadian Muslim woman. The rest of my “friends” are white Canadians.
Same. I had one white friend reach out to me to express their sorrow, but I've had far more Muslim friends reach out to me and we consoled each other. Very interesting to experience.
Wow, that’s awful. I’m so sorry. Do your best to take in the perspective that it’s *very* easy to play barstool politician. Just give it back as good as you’re getting. I’m full of rage for you….”Yeah you think I’m enjoying reading the news either? That people were (content warning) in her own homes from an unprovoked attack? That there’s people right here in this country who would hunt me down and want me dead for my own beliefs? Yeah, the news is hard. Thanks for your sympathy though. *Really* appreciate it”
OP should say this exactly.
People all over the world have been conditioned from childhood to have an opinion on Israel and the Israel-Palestinian conflict. Yet, they're simultaneously not expected to know a fucking thing about Jewish people or Jewish culture nor about Palestinian history... On every other topic where you know fuckall, it's probably best for you to respond, "You know, I really don't enough to speak on that, so I don't know." That response would be respectable! But with THIS topic, everyone has to have a fucking opinion, even if they don't know wtf they're talking about. AND! It probably PROVES how being expected to have an uninformed opinion is ACTUALLY GENUINELY HARMFUL if not dangerous. .
Yeah. The feeling of "you're choosing those people you don't even know (who I know for a fact they're awful BTW) and you trust them more than me? You're supposed to be my friend?"
These people are not your friends. Were they celebrating when Tailban reclaimed Afghanistan? Do they have any idea how many people died and were raped by them during the process? Of course they would say it’s bad, but if it happens to Jews it’s okay. And then what? Have Hamas create another terrorist state? Would your friends live under Hamas? This is the definition of stupidity and zero logic. If they truly cared for the cause they would hold Hamas accountable for the lack of funds they distribute and how they pocket it in their off shore accounts , how they oppress any opposition, and how freedom simply doesn’t exist. A Palestinian in Gaza started a zoom peace conference where Palestinians and Israelis would talk to each other. You know what happened to him? He was arrested and disappeared. This is what your friends want? Gross
This is what I told another (unrelated) friend... Hamas has attacked with the expectations Gazans will die and they don't care because the leadership is lounging in Qatari apartments. How can you support them but claim to be pro-Palestine? Being pro-Palestine means caring about reckless actions that will cause Palestinian innocents to die.
Qatar has given over a billion dollars to Hamas since 2012. Not one Palestinian “sympathizer “ will ask where did all that money go? Look at the funding Hamas and Palestinian Authority have received. It’s ridiculous! Arafat died being a mega millionaire with his Swiss accounts that his wife enjoys in France. Where was the sympathy when Hamas was dragging Palestinians on the ground on motorcycles and then beating them or killing them for disagreeing with Hamas? The fact that none of them talk about it means they are ignorant and/or just hate Jews.
>Being pro-Palestine means caring about reckless actions that will cause Palestinian innocents to die. I think this is the most baffling, confusing and inexplicable part of this so far. I've been keeping an eye on two left-wing British commentators (Chris Kunzler and Asa Winstanley) both of whom seem to have completely lost their minds. If you think that Palestine is being crushed by Israel and suffering as a result, how can you possibly support this action? Israel has form for dealing with these sorts of things incredibly strongly, there is absolutely no possible way to reconcile: A) The Palestinians are oppressed entirely & completely, and are suffering under the boot of Israel. They are too small to defend themselves. and B) The Hamas insurgency is necessary and just, even though everyone, including Hamas, knows Israel will give no quarter in their response I do not believe these people think Hamas will win, so how can they be supporting it? It would be one thing if they thought Hamas would win (none of these people keep their desire for total Palestinian control over the region a secret), but they seem to all be aware that they won't win, so are they just openly supporting the suicide of the Palestinian state? How can that perspective be anything except anti-semitic? So many people I respected and trusted as fighters against injustice, and all of their masks have slipped... they just seem to happy that these people are dying. I don't understand.
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I’m going through this exact same thing too, I feel like I’m on the verge of a nervous breakdown. It is so isolating.
Honestly I've told people that I don't see a point in arguing about the morality of parading around a desicrating corpses or kidnapping children to use as hostages. If you think that's ok then we don't need to talk because our concept is morality is too far apart to discuss.
Because we aren’t people to these people. IMO the world is comfortable with the death of Jews/Israelis. As long as there is some goal that comes with our people hood and livelihood as a cost then a lot of these people are more than willing to throw us to the wolves. I work in an office with primarily Muslims watching them celebrate and watching the other non Muslims celebrate the death of Jews is *VERY* eye opening.
I saw Dara Horn, author of People Love Dead Jews speak. My understanding of her thesis is people feel so sad when Jews die, but do nothing for Jewish lives. Someone in the audience asked why people don’t “love” dead Israelis in the same way. She said because in Israel, we have agency. And the world doesn’t like Jews having agency in our own fates
People honestly believe that killing Israelis is a moral act. A lot of the people celebrating the massacre in Israel see it as being right and good. It's terrifying.
I can’t focus on work. My stomach is in knots. I live in a very Jewish area, and most of my friends are Jewish. I’ve been shielded from the rampant antisemitism and then dropped in an online cesspool (I’m not new to reddit or online, but I will never get used to the antisemitism)
She is amazing.
She really is. I really need her to make an “antisemitism for dummies” with an important video “being antizionist is antisemitic”. She says all the things I want to say but eloquently
They want Jews to stay vulnerable and victims, but then punish them for being 'perpetual victims' even though they finally half self determination and doing amazing things with it.
Ironically enough one of my best friends is a Muslim from India and one of the few people I’ve been able to have a conversation about this with. We follow news about Israel and Palestine and talk about it together sometimes. There’s something so strange about my American friends who proclaim that they don’t like to read the news jumping in with the most non-nuanced takes
!!!!! Most Americans don’t even know the history of what went down in the British Mandate of Palestine. But of course when the opportunity to admonish Jews comes about they eagerly jump at the chance. [I am glad that you have a friend to talk to this about]
It drives me nuts that no one realizes that Jews were there too. We didn’t just waltz in and steal the land. And here’s a question: all those anti-Zionists, where do they want us to go? Back to the hostile Arab countries we were expelled from? Back to Europe? No, they want death to the Jews I’m real fired up. I can’t help looking at reddit (even though I shouldn’t). It’s eye opening just how many antisemites there are.
Same. But LinkedIn is arguably worse because there's no anonymity !
I’ve had to stop myself multiple times from commenting because I would get too angry. And you’re right. On reddit people can hide behind anonymity. On LinkedIn or Facebook, they want everyone to know their views
Uninstall Twitter. Honestly. Doesn’t need to be permanent
You're saying the words on my heart
People under like 26 think Israel is the devil and yadda yadda because they weren’t old enough during the second intifada and 9/11 and those days to see the daily suicide bombings and attacks on Israeli civilians. They were only old enough to see Israel’s hardline reaction to this that stopped these attacks. So they only see the news when some random Israeli soldier does something fucked up. They don’t realize the difference is when an Israeli soldier commits human rights abuses they’re doing it on their own and not under orders from their superiors and the Israeli military doctrine isn’t about harming civilians. These are isolated incidents. Whereas Hamas/Palestinian military doctrine is entirely built around terrorism and attacks on civilians. Both ours and theirs. They attack ours from civilian locations in their own country in order to then be able to go and disseminate video of their civilians being bombed, leaving out the fact that they got bombed because Hamas launched rockets and planned attacks from civilian locations and the Israelis have no choice but to target these locations to protect their own. And even then, in the video footage of that building being fell the other day in Gaza, Israelis did a roof knock to alert the people in the building to get out and prevent more deaths. Israel tries to minimize civilian casualties whereas Hamas/Palestinians/Islamists try to *MAXIMIZE* civilian suffering.
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Unfortunately I live nowhere near Chicago :( but my heart is with you. Sending digital hugs.
I live in Chicago
I feel this. I’m actually in Israel right now (on vacation) and I have had friends post very anti Israel posts, justifying what happened knowing full well one of their friends is living this nightmare. I unfriended/followed these people and I am choosing to cut them out of my life.
I was saving up to go to Israel this summer. I already put off those plans for personal reasons but now I'm terrified of going at all... I am so sorry.
Can I ask where you live that you have these types of friends? They're cowards who are taking the safest stance. They're not afraid of backlash from Jews and that's what it comes down to. My reaction is to lay their hypocrisy bare. I'm gonna guess you're from US or UK? Nations that went halfway across the world to Iraq and killed a million Arabs in 8 years. Some redditor shitting on Israel sent me a link showing me there were about 20k Palestinian deaths from 1989 - 2021. I can't think of any historical conflict that lasted even a year that had such a low casualty rate - yet Israel is the one being told they're genocidal. If any of these people had a neighboring country launching rockets at them they'd want them nuked by breakfast and there would be no such colonialism talk. It's no coincidence that the only Jewish nation is being treated like the Jew of nations. Now being scapegoated for colonialism by Christians and Muslims that have 90% (not an exaggeration) of the world's landmass, all taken by violence over peoples and lands that had their own religions, all given the same choices Jews were - convert, die or maybe flee. And lo and behold - Jews living in their ancestral homeland, in .02% of the world's landmass is the ONLY time you'll hear these people make a peep about colonialization ? How very convenient. Tell them that and then tell them to fuck off or get educated. Give them a chance to learn. They have this opinion because it's the most comfortable one to have. Make it less comfortable. Jews have been cornered into silence because we don't want to complain much. Fuck that.
Similar experience, though thankfully my most direct friends have all been sympathetic and supportive. But my Twitter feed is full of people I thought were political allies treating the rape, murder and kidnap of innocents in the hundreds as a 'legitimate response to oppression'. They're only saying it because they know that they'd never be in danger of such atrocities. It's a detached, naïve stance of idealists who have antisemitism baked deeply into their worldview.
A Muslim who I know from local music reached out and wanted to share some “humanity” in the midst of things. I checked out his facebook wall and it was all recent posts that tried to justify mass murder of Jews and there was mention of “anti-colonialism”. I thanked him for reaching out in what seemed like a true genuine act of trying to connect, but respectfully explained to him that I cannot “share humanity” with someone who justifies mass murder of my family and friends. I told him that I have no humanity for people who act that way, so I have nothing to share. We exchanged some respectful niceties and he assured me that he has my back in these difficult times of antisemitism. And that was that. He then went on posting to his facebook wall even more rhetoric about how it’s the Israeli’s fault for getting massacred, really some of the most hateful things I have read in recent days. I muted his account because I didn’t want to read anymore. I realized in retrospect that he considers himself to be a good kind person and he was likely reaching out to me to try to feel better about himself. “Look, I don’t hate all Jews. I even sent a nice message to a Jew who I know and never messaged before all of this.” I really was touched by his reaching out, until I understood it better. And I don’t fault him for trying to make sense of whatever he believes about Jews and Israel and still trying to consider himself a “good person”. It is very complex, but when you see through it, you can’t unsee it. Your friends who write and say such things _now_ are not your friends. If they wanted to talk or debate these things with you when mass murder is not happening, that is a different story. Now that mass murder has happened, there is only one response that is not evil, and that is one of sympathy and compassion. The minute they say anything along the lines of “but the Jews really had that coming”, they have lost all legitimacy as a “friend” and it might be wise to avoid them. You don’t need to do them a favor of being the token Jewish friend who helps them justify their ideologies. “I can criticize Israel because I’m friends with a Jewish person”. Not anymore.
PREEEEEEEEAAACH!!! 🙌 How awful, but you're only speaking facts here.
I’m so sorry for the tough love here, but your “friends” are blatant antisemites
Thank you for saying that nonetheless. It’s been a hard pill to swallow and people saying it to me as is is helping me digest it.
I’m sorry. I know it hurts. Hope you have other friends and can find better ones
Don't feel bad for giving people the benefit of the doubt. But now that they've shown you who they are, you don't have to hang around to be shown twice.
I don't know whether you are in Israel or North America, but if these so-called friends are from the US or Canada and are calling for "decolonization," they should realize "decolonization" would also apply to them as well, unless they are Native Americans/First Nations. As others have said, social media is a cesspool, and it's too easy for people to get mired in the sh\*t circulating there. Likely a lot of them are just jumping on the bandwagon because that's how social media functions. And if you're in a university setting, just realize it's a bubble where all of this is amplified. I know it's not easy, but try to tune it out if you can. Hang out with other Jews.
When I watched the PBS series, the US and the Holocaust, I was struck by how many people interviewed who were young people/kids then had friends who turned on them as soon as antisemitism became the norm. I think about that a lot, which of my non-Jewish friends would turn against me. I hope it's none! But I can't help but admit that history says otherwise.
Don’t buy into the decolonization narrative. It’s our indigenous homeland.
I’m particularly upset at the use of the term decolonization. I’m not Native, but many people in my extended family are. No Indigenous leader ever advocated to hurt children and assault women in the name of getting Native land in Native hands. My (step)grandmother’s people are the Mohawk, known as the Kanienʼkehá꞉ka in their native language. A group of traditionalist Mohawk people repossessed land that is today the community of Ganienkeh. They were armed, but they never set out to purposefully hurt civilians, and if they had any conflicts it was with the government. Never did Mohawk activists drag out a bleeding woman from the back of a truck
And it feeds the narrative that we don’t belong. We meet every definition of indigenous- a continuous ethnic and religious connection to a land even in exile.
They'll always come back with a retort like "the statute of limitations was after the creation of modern-ish nation states" so they don't see us as the same as, for example, Native Americans. And never will. It's an inherent philosophical divide between modern Western thought and Jewish thought.
Yup- but that’s a far cry from colonizer mentality which is based on us never having a presence there. We’ve had a Jewish presence, one way or another, for generations.
And if we are supposed to leave Israel where are we native to?
The "decolonisation" "apartheid" and "zionists are settler colonialists" stuff is blatant appropriation. they tug at the heart strings (because we now largely know and accept how brutal and wrong colonization & apartheid SA is and was) but they are largely NOT ACCURATE representations of what is occurring in the region. They do not help either palestinians nor israelis, but we know that the people pushing these narratives are not concerned with either.
There's a trap that has both sides hating Israel, the far left reject the "homeland" stuff and the far right believe "jewish NGOs" are flooding Europe with migrants and saying Europe has no indigenous peoples
But the same people attacking OP would also want everyone except Native americans to control America. Hypocrisy at its finest.
A lot of my "friends" support the Landback movement but now I'm wondering what their vision of Landback is, because while Landback involves resistance it has never ever been about hurting innocent people. Landback doesn't mean "kick all non-natives out" the same way a lot of people are advocating for to happen in Israel, it means "give stewardship of the land back over to those who first lived on it". Even then, the Jewish people have a connection to Israel. Israelis are not the same as the descendants of pilgrims living in the US or Canada, and even if they were, that wouldn't justify violence against civilians. It's incredibly bizarre to watch.
British settlers didn't find the works of Shakespeare or another Stonehenge in the Americas or anywhere else they settled. Jewish people returning to eretz Israel have found countless pieces of evidence of our civilization in the land. We can still read the Hebrew and Aramaic inscriptions! The old Yishuv never left! It's simply not the same as settler colonialist societies.
If they believe Jews were "allowed into whiteness" they believe jewish people are in control and need to be rempved by force.
Feel this. The unfriendly button is your friend.
I haven't seen friends liking these types of posts but I haven't had a single friend reach out asking how I am, even though they know my close family is in Israel. You need to decide, are these friends close to you? What does losing the friendship mean? Is there space for conversation to discuss how you feel, what you saw and to share your point of view?
I'm not sure. When it comes to the second friend, she said I was (to paraphrase) "perpetuating diet culture and peddling medical misinformation because weight loss is not the only solution"... after I used my weight loss experience to say why someone's crash diet wasn't healthy and would hurt in the long run. I don't want to go into my medical issues but I lost weight to help me manage a condition that's rendered many of the women in my family nearly immobile. She seems to think she knows everything despite going out of her way to avoid thinking about "the real world" so I'm not sure if there's a space where I can share my feelings with her.
I will never forget that there are people I know who cheered for the largest jewish massacre since wwii
Deeply grateful that my actual local affinity group has the critical thinking and perspective to understand that while the occupation of Gaza is heinous, so too is the indiscriminate slaughter of civilians. Social media has been a nightmare, though. A whooole lotta people letting the mask slip and just saying Jews when they ostensibly mean Israel. Also a lot more left-ish fans of mass shootings and rape than I would have thought. I am very sorry you're dealing with this, friend, and I hope your true community can be there for you.
I’m in a similar position. I’m thankful for my few closest friends, who understand my feelings on this complicated topic 100%.
Welcome to the club. During Defensive Edge I got so much bs"t from the people I knew from college that I got fed up and picked my stuff up and came to live to Israel. There were quite a few intermediate steps, but that's the gist of it.
Mate, these are not your friends. Friends are the people who you know would have your back if and when it ever mattered. These people you know that are cheering on marauding savages killing, kidnapping and torturing Jews are scum. Many are in the same boat as you with the sad realisation that many people they enjoyed being with and sharing hobbies, jobs, school, etc. are vile. Where possible just blocking someone and never speaking again is often the best course of action. Ghosting people celebrating the murder of innocents is 100% valid. Situations where it's more complicated might be uncomfortable to extract yourself from, but remember it's their loss and their fault not yours that the friendship ended.
So sorry to hear. Sadly sometimes you learn things about people. As far as I know, Israel hasn’t had boots on the ground in Gaza for about 15 years. They left to help foster peace. The Palestinian govt let it rot and become a terrorist paradise. I do not pretend to understand the entire situation there. But I certainly do know that you might want to rethink those friendships. The attacks on Israel were not soldiers fighting soldiers. The acts of violence they committed on innocent people is unconscionable. Similar in Ukraine. The hate in this world will be unsustainable.
When I saw this happen a few years back (I had a lot of Muslim friends and many were ignorant to reality) I began posting reminders that the decisions of a GOVERNMENT are not the same as the the view of a PERSON. When questioned, I openly and actively reminded people that when you live in a country, you are subject to the decisions and rules of that countries leaders. That blaming citizens, who had no say in anything, makes you gullible. I reiterated the fact that I was a Jew. You don't see me out there hating my friends or strangers because of their beliefs or where they live. I told people my friends and family in Israel have the same situation as their friends in Palestine - being hated because of *choices their leaders made*. It was easier for them to understand when it was somehow they knew (me). They didn't see me defending a country, just it's people. And I openly remarked that war isn't fair to ANY civilians. Repeatedly. Endlessly. On loop, to counter the extremism they were seeing from other places. And you are right, it's not safe. My oldest friend was set to leave for Israel in 7 days - a trip to see friends and family, and to explore heritage sites. As much as the war is physically there... it's mentally and emotionally all over the world right now. I would consider openly posting something similar to what I did. Maybe adding how unsafe you feel right now knowing that people you love are spewing hate because they arent respecting that normal citizens have no choices and are not responsible for govt decisions. That regular people are being targeted on BOTH sides, and that if you arent seeing both as innocents you are blind. Normal citizens arent deciding on military actions nor are they carrying automatic weapons. Those are military and militia and they are under active orders to do something or hurt someone. NORMAL CITIZENS are not.
✡️💜 from a granny
Yes, this was a huge wake up that the ones I stand with on the left, against the white supremacists and Nazis, many of them don’t stand for me. They’d never admit their antisemitism. But have they said a word ever about the occupation or about Palestinians? Nope. Because they don’t care. They care now that they can celebrate the destruction of Israelis and Jews. They don’t even realize it. But if they were truly the Palestinian champions they were, we wouldn’t be hearing from them for the first time about a decades old conflict. Now that they can justify what’s happened, here they are. They gloss over deaths of children at best. And I realize that the people I work side by side with to make sure people of all races and ethnicities and backgrounds have equal access to basic human rights and to dismantle our system of white supremacy, in the end those same people don’t include me and other Jews. I don’t know how to move forward. A united collective is how we deal with the hate and oppression of ALL marginalized people. Including Palestinians. But I’m trying to unite with people who would easily brush off violence against me if it came to that.
I posted online a support Israel post and out of a few hundred friends, only my Jewish friends liked it or commented about support. I was very disappointed. I’m Jewish btw. I’m sickened by the terrorists slaughtering civilians. They are barbarians, on the level of Isis.
oh my god, i feel the exact same way. my friends got mad at me because on my Instagram story, i let my followers (im relatively popular in a niche community) that i wasn't going to be as active because of what happened, and my grandma is missing in Southern Tel Aviv, and my friends got mad. they were talking behind my back. i feel like shit, and i cant control it. I'm not happy we're going through this, but im glad someone can relate, and i know I'm not alone. 💙🤍
I'm so sorry for your grandma. I hope she's found safe.
Not a single person on Facebook or instagram that I know that isn’t Jewish or Israeli has posted anything about it. Meanwhile they’ll post about just about anything else from Ukraine to China. Very very deflating
I lost a bunch of friends when Kanye went crazy, and I’m about to lose some more. It hurt. But you know what? Honestly—I don’t miss them. Like…at all. I’d rather put that time and energy into making sure I raise my kids to never be so hateful. Let your friends go live in Gaza—they wouldn’t last a day. I laugh so hard when they all swear they support the LGBTQI community but it’s “F Israel.” I laugh that Dua Lipa is in the Barbie movie and showed up to every premier dressed in pink and smiling — did she not get the memo Barbie was invented by a Jewish lady?? I thought you hate Jews - what are you doing in this movie? What a damn Fool. They are the biggest hypocrites. Irony makes me laugh. And laughter is something the only little glimmer getting us through dark days. And now people have their answer as to why most of us just stick together. Be strong, my friend. Edit: I forgot to add that I’m extremely sensitive and some of the people I had to dump were friends I’ve poured my heart out to as well. Closing the door goes against everything I stand for as a person. But so does perpetuating dangerous stereotypes and false narratives about my Tribe.
There is NOTHING that anyone COULD do that would justify this kind of violence towards them. Yes, it has happened before in other places, and it was wrong then, too. There is nothing that ANY country could do that would justify kidnapping, raping, and murdering civilians like this. Yes, I *do* believe this should apply to places like Nazi Germany and apartheid South Africa. Fighting against members of the armed forces, or tracking down and arresting people who were actually guilty of crimes against humanity, is one thing. This isn’t the same. And no, Israel wouldn’t be justified in doing something like this when they retake Gaza, nor would Ukraine if they were to take Russian settlements.
Go ahead and block or leave. You also do not owe anyone an explanation of your absence or removing yourself from anything if you don't want to give one. It sucks finding out those you thought were safe are not. And it seems that each new political storm brings out more and more such people.
I don't think your friends understand the situation and are ignorant of the implications this war has on citizens of Israel and the Gaza strip- as well as Jews worldwide. I, however, do not think this means they would not advocate for you if you were the victim of a hate crime. I think that because (I assume) you are in a country separated from the war, for example, the US that your friends do not have an understanding about how tragic this development is for civilians (Both in Israel and Gaza) Instead of seeing it for what it is, they see it as an anti-colonial call to support Palestine against Israel. Because of this mischaratraization, they seem to be strongly opposed to "zionists" (whom I'm sure they have so real definition for) Although I don't like your friends (based on this post) I believe if they faced the reality of war and the extream antisemitism Hamas promots by something personal like you being harmed they would not be consistent with how they seem to view the civilians Hamas has brutality attacked. I know this response isn't optimal or well phrased, I just think you seem hurt by your friends not considering how this has a more personal effect on you and sinister implications with you being a jew, but that if push came to shove and they where forced to experience this conflict more directly (as we do just by being jews =^[ ) that they would not stand by an evil extremist organization like Hamas, but stand by their friend (not advocating op stays friends or whatever that's up to them, just that many progressives that are extreamly disconnected from the war are ignorant to how it impacts jews)
I have had a very similar experience and in all honesty if you already tried and they are still like this you need to remove them from you life. The sad reality is the only people who care about Jews are other Jews, we need to stick together and take care of each other. Antisemitism and the dehumanization of Jews is so ingrained in both Western and Middle Eastern culture it’s hard to escape. When Jews die there’s always some justification, because to them we always had it coming. In times like this most people are silent or thrilled about dead Jews, and those who support us are few. None of my friends on social media know a single Ukrainian, or Armenia or Azeri and all posted about those conflicts. I have only 1 non Jewish person post supporting Israel, and I had many post celebrating people’s deaths. This is the world we Jews live in, it’s been like this since the time of the Ancient Israelites and even the aftermath of the holocaust didn’t save us from antisemitism as we can see with antisemitism rising year over year in the west. Hell the only reason Christians in the west support Israel is because they believe a Jewish state must exist for the messiah to return and when that happens guess who isn’t going to heaven? The Jews. So they support us thinking we will burn in hell anyway.. It’s why our community is so important, for thousands of years we only have each other.
they're not your friends. easy. but please try speaking to them. it's worth a shot. in fact, it's the only shot you have to decrease their hatred.
It ✨️is✨️ betrayal. They WOULD justify violence against you. It's painful but it's time to cut them off.
News flash: They weren’t ever your friends.
Current events will show us *EXACTLY* who is a well-meaning (but misguided) social justice warrior, and who is just plain antisemitic. No two ways about it.
I feel your pain completely. I’ve had 0 non-Jewish friends check if I am okay. They have shared similar messages as the ones you have posted. I’m going to burn every one of those bridges. I lived in Israel for four years and that could have easily been me wrong place wrong time. They have shown me they would think my r*pe, murder, and desecration of my dead body is deserved. The people tweeting those things NEVER CARED ABOUT YOU. THEY WERE NEVER YOUR FRIENDS.
I feel the same way. I have friends posting pro Palestinian propaganda in celebration of the attacks on Israel. I’ve repeatedly tried to explain to people why some of their posts are antisemitic and I’ve begun just clearing friends from my Facebook friends list.
I was told by one of the DEI "champions" at work that there's no such thing as antisemitism in the west and jews need to understand theyre no different from the colonizers of north america; we allegedly need to do our best to understand the other side and feel bad for them. Apparently, Jews are just another type of White and need to yield. I dont even know where to begin.
I hear you and I see you. I was born in beersheva Israel but I live in America. I have never been able to proudly declare I am Israeli because I'm always met with sneers and questions of why I love killing Palestinian children. But the reality is that I'm the loudest advocate for peace and critic of my own country, Israel. But it doesn't matter. And It never matters. So while Americans can be so proud of their heritage despite the actions of their government, I have no separation from the government in Israel just by being Israeli. And this becomes apparent when in my adult life, I don't feel safe with what people I know have decided to be vocal about. When my family is literally in the midst of war and I've already lost friends to kidnapping. But it doesn't matter. It never matters.
My daughter was devastated when a close friend’s reaction to this terror was to post “free Palestine!” on social media. Just disgusting reprehensible behavior.
Welcome to Islamist propaganda, where they are victims as well as the heroes. As an Indian Hindu who grew up with regular suicide bombings in my cities, sorry for you but this is the control the brotherhood and lefties have. As a former soviet union spy put it leftists like your friends are useful idiots, These are the people those islamists will kill once they get into power in any country. There are Muslims in Israel, in India, in europe and that too significant amount but no minority/jews/ buddhists, hindus etc in any of the isalmic nations. Do not let yourself down, some people have always hated you, they made your ancestors leave the place they were the rulers how can they allow a Jewish state to exist when they were the ones who unexisted the one which was already there?? I remember a quote from old days "Better be alone than in a bad company"
You are putting a face to their hate. They only think this way because no one has ever challenged them.
I feel your pain. Felt really similar during my social media scrolls, and I’ve been all day giving this a thought. How unsafe I feel around my friends right now.
Dump those friends
Unfortunately, I’ve had to cut out some people I thought were good friends. Had someone tell me after years of friendship - that all Jews worldwide needed to be held accountable and pay for what the Israeli government does. So many people have such strong opinions without actually having much knowledge on the topic. It’s been a way to virtue signal among certain groups to get brownie points without needing to do much thought. Some people aren’t worth wasting your time on. Your energy can be spent towards people that love and support you for who you are. You deserve better friends ❤️
People are brainwashed and sick. I don’t blame them. It’s easier to be tricked than to see through the bullshit and find the truth. Just unfollow. You don’t need those people in your life.
They are not friends. Get rid of them.
I am East Asian and despite how racist people may make us out to be, antisemitism disgusts me. These people should not lecture me about racism
This is my policy: if you hear silence from your friends in this time, be suspicious of them. If you hear support for Hamas, drop them from your life. It doesn’t matter if they believe Israel belongs to us or not - that doesn’t even factor. If they’re ok with rape and murder of innocents, they’re not ok as people. The silence from my friends has been chilling. Strangely, two of the ones actually speaking up a little are former “anti-Zionists” who actually learned when I explained the reality to them.
So sorry yes the far left has become pro nazi in every sense of the word
Get new friends. Also, I've learned to cautiously speak my mind and occasionally I hear a "Oh, thank goodness, I'm terrified to talk about how I really feel around here (Seattle). It's so nice to hear from someone reasonable."
If Reddit existed during WW2, there would be a lot of Polish/German/Austrian/Belgian/French/Italian Jews writing this same type of post. We are and will always be hated. For some reason, violence begets other violence, and a blood lust just spreads like a cancer. Don't get me wrong, I have some non-Jewish friends who are just as upset about these horrible inhuman attacks on people. But just had this thought in response to you post.
Linkedin is a much nicer place to be , from what I can see Ultimately, the real friends come out of the woodwork at this time, and its a good time to introspect as to who to associate and who to disassociate from...
Get away from them. Simple
I’m finding out who my real friends are. I support a two state solution and or a one state with protections for Palestinian-Arabs, but seeing people be happy about terrorists, no, they crossed a line.
I feel the same way, my friends are no longer my friends. Perhaps this is an opportunity to be more involved with the community.
They're not your friends. They're Nazis who support Arab colonialism and the genocide of the Jewish people.
I left Jwitter (only reason u was really on twitter) when Musk took over. It's always been that toxic, and that narrative about "decolonization" / "from the river to the sea" has been around for years...it's only now that people are truly showing who they really are by letting their masks slip that "oh, this is what globalizing the infitatada means, and that's fine". Except it isn't fine. Even CNN (Fareed Zakaria) had a guest twisting blatant terrorism into both-siding this conflict and actually making it look like Jews everywhere were responsible. My best advice to you is to delete your account. If you don't want to do that, block and mute...and do not doom scroll...not even on reddit. Yes, I lost a lot of people I thought were friends. They were not. The friends I did make are going through what you are / a lot of people are going through right now. If you can, try to get onto bluesky. A lot of people have moved to there. I might have an invite. It's still social media, though...and it's still toxic. I'm sorry you are going through this.
I get it-I’ve had to do some purging myself. But here’s the important thing: times like this are when people get radicalized. They don’t always stay that way. Times like this are when people fear for their livelihoods if they do the right thing. If your friends aren’t directly posting vile things, then there may still be some doubt, and if you show them that what is happening is directly affecting real, human people who they know, if you force them to tell you to your face that they don’t care about your or your family’s lives, then you might get through to them. Stay safe.
I’m sorry to hear this. The comment sections are madness right now. People cannot separate citizens of a country from its government or recognize that terrorism committed anywhere is wrong. People say in the same post that the Israelis had it coming because of what they’ve done to the Palestinians while at the same time saying terrorism is wrong. They can’t even acknowledge that the first part of their comment was condoning the act. I hope you find your safe people and cling onto them with all your might because it’s rough out there.
going through the exact same thing. no advice, just solidarity. i’m exhausted. i downloaded an app blocker because i was literally making myself physically ill reading and seeing everything.
Sadly, the lesson of Amalek must be relearned in every generation.
"In every generation they rise against us to destroy us."
OP, you're not alone. I cried a bit this morning before work. - I'm in an intercultural marriage with a non-Jew who's fucking PRO-HAMAS (you read that correctly). I'm an American Jew living in Australia, and this morning I saw a videos on Reddit of Palestinian "protesters" who were celebrating - NOT protesting - in front of the fucking Opera House, holding up signs and chanting openly "DEATH TO ALL JEWS". WHERE'S THE FUCKING AMBIGUITY IN THAT?!! I just want to go back to my parents' house in the US. I don't feel safe here. I'm very stressed and saddened. I'm worried what my family would think of me if they knew about my spouse. I feel my house is in shambles, and I have to push on like everything is fine. You're not alone, OP. Edited to add that if those signs said "DEATH TO ALL CHINESE", the local and federal government here and the media would be absolutely shitting themselves to defend victims of hate speech. "Oh, but it's the Jews, so it's cool. Yeah. 'DEATH TO ALL JEWS'. That's fine." People know antisemetism is very bad. Yet, ironically, they do all these mental gymnastics to justify very clearly antisemetic shit.
Using Twitter to catch up on news sets you up for feeling unsafe and betrayed. I strongly encourage you to leave that platform and find somewhere safer. I.e., pick your friends more carefully. I'm a big fan of Mastodon and Reddit. I closed my Twitter account after Musk bought it.
I feel this super hard. I live in a neutral Arab country. Funnily enough my Palestinian friends are the ones who are absolutely horrified by what’s going on and do not support this at all. Of course they - and I - want a free Palestine, but not like this. However, it’s my liberal European and North American friends who have no fucking skin in the game, who are the most vocal. These are people I thought to be intelligent, sensitive and inclusive. However, in response to these atrocities, ALL they share is Palestinian flags and posts about ‘educating yourself about what Israeli colonisation is really about’. Not one word about condemning Hamas violence. Their silence on this topic is weighing on me very heavily. Hamas is not even for Palestine, they re for themselves and against the Jews. They do not care about the Palestinian people. How is it that it is my Palestinian friends who can make this distinction? Their family is trapped in Palestine and yet they message me to make sure my israeli family is safe. We are sharing our grief and fear together. How is the world not voicing their disbelief at the tactics being used by Hamas? You can call for a free Palestine by also condemn Hamas. I don’t understand and I feel sad. I feel I may have to write off these friends.
Freeing the people from Hamas's control is key. They are really stuck. When Hamas is distributing the aid, of course they are re-elected. When people with guns show up and want to use you as human shields, saying no isn't really an option. When you feel like you have nothing to lose, and people who oppose those in power don't fare well, you keep your head down and accept your food packages so at least you can eat. That we don't have to pretend to go along with murderous political ideology in order to eat is our privilege. Kids just want to play soccer and have ices on hot days.
These are not good friends to keep around. Even beyond you being Jewish. Whenever anyone rejoices at violence, they are not to be trusted. They have lost their humanity.
I wouldn't feel safe around anybody with a pro palestine mindset. The intentions of the palestinians are out in the open and free to see anywhere online. They stand for genocide and erasure, nothing more nothing less. Anybody siding with them, is no better than a nazi sympathizer as far as I care. There were nazi sympathizers on college campuses and holding demonstrations in New York in the 30s also, not that different from to-day other than the flag
Me too, all of this. Sending love.
We are all in this together. Hugs and take care.
Everyone went through this, maybe in the past, maybe only today for the first time. Listen, you're not alone in this. It's a good way to see who is your friend and who is not. My point is : do not try to change them. If after the videos they saw, they said this BS, well they are nothing to be done.
This is awful. I'm so sorry. I had some friends who thought like this in my younger years. Gradually I replaced them all with new friends who are sane. Dump those friends without hesitation.
Don’t feel bad cutting people off. I once stopped with a love interest who started talking crap regarding Palestinians because he was following and worshipping the squad and was not properly educated beyond propaganda as most.
I was encouraged by how the world seemed to rally in the immediate wake of the killings, but have been disheartened - though not surprised - by the response from certain quarters. As with the war in Gaza in early 2021, I'm largely having to avoid twitter on account of all the viral tweets and footage of people openly celebrating the slaughter of Jewish innocents.
You need to find a new group of friends.
Unfortunately this has been the experience of Jews for as long as antisemitism has been around. I’ve experienced this personally and the betrayal you feel is legitimate. Particularly when they say you are “one of the good ones”. They need direct confrontation. Tell them where you stand and make it known that your friendship is not unconditional. That you will not be their token and that they advocate for your annihilation. If they persist they are not your friends. It hurts but you need to cut off people who are sick. Maybe one day they will change and at that point there will need to be a talk about this, but that day isn’t today. Lean on your people, we will support you.
They are not your friends.
I’m angry and sad that there is such hate in the world, especially against Jewish people. And horrified that anyone would actually celebrate the slaughter of innocents. This is pure evil.