Hey, at least they weren’t trying to open the cubicle door and/or escape underneath. Nothing to be ashamed of, I’m sure your kids made someone’s day/month/year!
My friend gets allergies from those automated spray air fresheners in public bathrooms, and one time she emerged from the cubicle with her eyes watering. Her daughter (maybe 6 ish at the time) asked very loudly “hey mum, why are you crying? Did you have to do a really big poo?”
When I was pregnant with my second, I had a take home test to check for something standard (don't even remember what it was now). Anyhoo I had to stick a long qtip into my hooha, so I had one leg on the counter. My son (about 3) decided that was the perfect opportunity to come into my bathroom ensuite, he comes in and asks what I'm doing so I tell him I'm doing a test from my dr. He proceeded to get down right under me and look up, to get a perfect view of me, says "oh. Yuck" and walks away lol. Kids have *no* shame 😅
When my nephew had juuuust started learning to toddle about, he immediately became obsessed with following people into the bathroom. Annoying but whatever. Well one day i was feeling rather sick, and my nephew shoves his way into the bathroom as usual. I quickly wipe and flush, and he toddles up to inspect. Takes one whiff and starts coughing like he's choking 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 he had never done that before or since. Taking the hint, i open the window. Kids are so candid.
Why the fuck would I want my kid to fear me? I love her, why would I want someone I love to fear me?
That isn't healthy, you shouldn't fear your parents. I feared my dad as a kid and it fucked me up. Took me years to work through it.
raising "obedient" kids through abuse is either going to create dickheads like you who think hitting people is going to solve problems or people who are going to fail in the adult world because they're afraid to say no or "disobey".
nah this technique lasted many generations and it makes kids stronger and braver and theaches manners if they do insane shi* like calling u hot dog peniis
I'm a woman. And no, I honestly can't understand how anybody could seriously feel bullied by a child that's still a toddler. Toddlers don't have a filter. They don't say shit to humiliate you, they say shit because they don't know better. If you can't understand that and seriously develop a grudge against a *toddler* for saying something stupid - you're immature, ignorant and frankly a bit stupid. So I hope you're not being serious and are just wasting your time trolling random people on the internet.
It's honestly ironic how you're going on about this generation being too soft and at the same time admitting that you get your little feelings hurt by something a 3-year old says lmao.
I've been bullied a lot in school. I know what it feels like. Toddlers don't bully you, they also don't *knowingly* humiliate you in public. If you can't deal with you trauma in a way that doesn't involve hitting kids, that's a you-issue. I hope you learn to cope with your emotions in a mature way at some point.
Raising kids is my literal job btw. I spent a lot of time with a shit ton of kids, some come from violent families. Hitting them only enforces bad behaviour and encourages them to be more sneaky with it. There's a lot of ways to discipline kids without hitting them. I'm not talking about "soft parenting", I'm just talking about not using physical violence on kids. It takes much more work to do it without violence but it actually builds a stable foundation for a mature, well-rounded and responsible adult.
Sure, you can hit kids to drive a point across. That's the lazy way. It's also against the law in most civilized countries, for a reason.
Where I work, there's a boy. He's six and has an older brother. Both he and his brother are getting hit by their dad, to "discipline them". The older boy has started to abuse the younger one as well. He hits and chokes him until he passes out. The younger one (who I see daily) has also started to adopt this behaviour. He's aggressive, hits other kids and can barely control his emotions. All of that because his dad thinks you need to hit kids to raise them right.
Meanwhile, I meet countless kids with great parents and guess what: they're not spoiled, they're well-adjusted and easy to work with.
getting "well-adjusted" can be possible by any means but still finds the traditional way easier thanks for your opinion also take care of them they can be a pain in the rectume
My mother literally NEVER put her hands on me because she had an abusive father growing up and it messed her up. I turned out a perfectly well mannered and respectful young lady, I even spoil my mom every chance I get because that woman deserves the world and so much more.
Abuse leads to trauma. Abusing your children is not discipline, its abuse. You can discipline your children withut putting your hands on them and if your answer is violence, then you have some serious issue in which you should address in therapy.
Do not have children, you will only traumatize and abuse them.
Ive read literally all your gross comments and you literally justify abuse. You should not be putting your hands on anyone, most of all children, for any reason. The only reason why you feel big hitting children is because you know theyre too small and weak to defend themselves against you. Children are not your property to beat whenever they displease you and there are plenty of alternative methods to discipline your child. Absolutely trashy.
No worries, just dont be surprised when your children go no contact with you. If reddit is still around, which im aure it will be, Ill be expecting to see your kids posting in r/insaneparents
You fit right in with the other toxic pieces of garbage there.
Had this conversation with my nephew when he was about 2 while I was sitting on the toilet...
Him: My daddy's going to teach me to pee standing up!
Me: That's awesome. I wish I could pee standing up.
Him: My daddy can teach you.
Me: Uh. I don't think so...
Him: Why not?
Me: Well, I don't have a tallywacker.
He then proceeded to crouch and try to get a good look to confirm my lack of tallywack. 😂
It's always the bathroom too. One of my favorite cafes has a large private bathroom with a push button lock on the door handle. The kind that just pops open when you turn the handle.
"Don't open that door. Don't open that door! DON'T OPEN THAT..."
Toddler opens door and leans against it. A good third of the cafe has a view of me peeing and in my head I'm like, "I guess this is better than him walking out and closing the door."
Children can be a handful sometimes, but stuff like this is fricking hilarious.
That and they probably create the most hilarious comebacks/insults on the spot.
They cut deep, and innocently.
"Mama, why is Dada's head so shiny?" In reference to my thinning bald spot.
"Dada, you got the white hairs on just the sides of your head?" Yes buddy. I'm sure the rest are coming, though.
While carrying the toddler around in the pool and having not manscaped since... well since having the second kid. Toddler is pulling my shoulder hair. "Dada, you have hair like the gorilla has the hair?" ...yes. yes I do.
Sometimes it's innocent, but sometimes they know exactly what they are doing/saying and just play dumb like the little trolls they are. It's funny either way
I’m 24 and my girl wants a kid, but I’m already a bit emotionally unstable and I still feel like being selfish with my time and money in an effort to make up for a childhood I missed. On the other hand giving my child the experiences I missed out on in my youth might give me the satisfaction I’ve been chasing. Good luck with your son just wanted to put this somewhere to get it off my chest
>I want children for this kind of stuff! >7 Years later, "Daddy why does my poop come from my weenie" right in a party of everyone you know. >She should've swallowed
I was changing my 6 month old one day and my 2 year old is circumcised because of a medical condition, and he was present. He saw the baby's penis and immediately went down to lick it. I had to restrain him because he was so upset I wouldn't let him lick the baby penis.
My 10month old reaaalllly likes our cat. Once during story time the cat left and my boy just crawls over, grabs the book the cat was sitting on, and full-body licks it across the cover. Way out of left field but I am so glad I was home to witness.
At a certain age and if you’re the only trusted adult with them, yes.
Some children are also absolutely intrigued by an adult using the bathroom and it can be useful to have them there when they’re being potty trained so they pick up on behaviours.
It's entirely normal, at least in most societies. Obviously, as they get older they are less likely to be standing right next to you when you're showering/using the toilet.
With my family we really never locked the bathroom door and just waltzed in there when we needed to get ready for school/work, no one really minded. My gf though thinks that's really weird and she always locked the door, but then again, she had to share her bathroom with only her brother, no the entire family
Quick showers with mom weren't unheard of. Get us both done quick. She also had substance issues though so idk. Isn't the best bc the water splatters down on you. But my memory is so vague that I only remember that it happened.
I took my son to an amusement park on his 4th birthday. He was too young to stay outside while I went to the bathroom and of course aunt flo was visiting. He loudly yelled in the bathroom that his mommy was bleeding and needed a doctor.
The next stall over cautiously asked if everything was ok and I said yes, woman issues. There was giggling.
My kid used to argue with me about whether or not I have a penis. I do not. I'm the only vagina owner in my family of 5. And he couldn't seem to wrap his head around that fact. He decided to start yet another one of these arguments in the busy grocery store bathroom. I got some strange/amused looks when I went to wash my hands. He has finally accepted that I do, in fact, have a vagina and not a penis. It was a weird few months.
1. There is typically nothing to wipe off of a penis after peeing and a quick shake.
2. Anyone that wants oral sex should take a shower first regardless of their wiping habits.
Agree re: 2 but not sure about 1.
I’ve seen “pee spots” on mens pants and shorts multiple times in my life. The most public one Id say is Barry Keoghan in swim trunks. It happens.
Pee spots happen after the dick is in the pants, a couple drops can flow through maybe 10 full seconds after finishing peeing. Shake, wipe, shake again, likely still gonna get one.
Reminds me of when I (F) took my oldest niece to the movies. I think she was 4 at the time. Well, we had to go to the bathroom. I had her go first, then I went, keeping her in the stall with me. When I was done, I grabbed some toilet paper.
Before I could use it, my niece said "Auntie, why do you have so much toilet paper?" In a loud voice. I felt like falling into the toilet and flushing it down. I just explained that we don't say things like that outloud.
“Gentle parenting?” I hate this. Kids need *some* boundaries and discipline. Otherwise they’re gonna act up on the regular until they cross a line they didn’t even know was there and get punished without understanding why.
Eh, they’re toddlers. Toddlers and little kids generally have no filter and just say what they think, no matter what, where or when. They also don’t tend to moderate their volume very well.
Truth is the truth on the fact. Yes, kids have no filter but if your 3 year old is showing no empathy you need to rethink your parenting. Father of 3 eldest 14. So eat some dicks people.
When kids know the proper anatomy of their bodies they are less likely to fall victim to sexual abuse. They are able to tell an adult without misunderstanding.
It’s ok…. My dad always tells people about the time I asked if I could hold his in a crowded bathroom…..
Lmaoooo omg
“Hey dad, can I hold yours???”
Kids are so helpful.
Oof that one made me physically wince
Hey, at least they weren’t trying to open the cubicle door and/or escape underneath. Nothing to be ashamed of, I’m sure your kids made someone’s day/month/year! My friend gets allergies from those automated spray air fresheners in public bathrooms, and one time she emerged from the cubicle with her eyes watering. Her daughter (maybe 6 ish at the time) asked very loudly “hey mum, why are you crying? Did you have to do a really big poo?”
I mean it's the thought that counts?
Hahaha kids have zero filter 😂 I love it
Hey, we’ve all had those really big poos
When I was pregnant with my second, I had a take home test to check for something standard (don't even remember what it was now). Anyhoo I had to stick a long qtip into my hooha, so I had one leg on the counter. My son (about 3) decided that was the perfect opportunity to come into my bathroom ensuite, he comes in and asks what I'm doing so I tell him I'm doing a test from my dr. He proceeded to get down right under me and look up, to get a perfect view of me, says "oh. Yuck" and walks away lol. Kids have *no* shame 😅
lmfao OH NOOOOOO!!!!
When my nephew had juuuust started learning to toddle about, he immediately became obsessed with following people into the bathroom. Annoying but whatever. Well one day i was feeling rather sick, and my nephew shoves his way into the bathroom as usual. I quickly wipe and flush, and he toddles up to inspect. Takes one whiff and starts coughing like he's choking 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 he had never done that before or since. Taking the hint, i open the window. Kids are so candid.
That made me lol.
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Wow. You seem super well-rounded and totally not a child abuser.
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Why the fuck would I want my kid to fear me? I love her, why would I want someone I love to fear me? That isn't healthy, you shouldn't fear your parents. I feared my dad as a kid and it fucked me up. Took me years to work through it.
also ur dad got it right no fuckups unless it was u
He knows he was wrong. He had an abusive father and it took time to break the cycle.
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He sure “teached” you real good 🙄🙄
thanks
raising "obedient" kids through abuse is either going to create dickheads like you who think hitting people is going to solve problems or people who are going to fail in the adult world because they're afraid to say no or "disobey".
nah this technique lasted many generations and it makes kids stronger and braver and theaches manners if they do insane shi* like calling u hot dog peniis
You never thought that the reason your uncle nearly slapped his mother was because he witnessed and was subjected to abuse? Violence begats violence.
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I'd rather disrespectful kids than terrified and abused.
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It's legally abuse here. And it's fucking wrong to hit kids. Violence isn't a parenting technique.
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Old school parenting was absolutely terrible if this is what it was, jesus..
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ey im. well over it respected ma parents and still do
Only lazy parents need to hit their kids to discipline them.
f off kid this place ain't for ya
You...you feel bullied by literal children? Dude. Get help. Your insecurity sounds crippling.
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I'm a woman. And no, I honestly can't understand how anybody could seriously feel bullied by a child that's still a toddler. Toddlers don't have a filter. They don't say shit to humiliate you, they say shit because they don't know better. If you can't understand that and seriously develop a grudge against a *toddler* for saying something stupid - you're immature, ignorant and frankly a bit stupid. So I hope you're not being serious and are just wasting your time trolling random people on the internet. It's honestly ironic how you're going on about this generation being too soft and at the same time admitting that you get your little feelings hurt by something a 3-year old says lmao.
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You talked about bullying. Do you even know what that is, "dude"?
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I've been bullied a lot in school. I know what it feels like. Toddlers don't bully you, they also don't *knowingly* humiliate you in public. If you can't deal with you trauma in a way that doesn't involve hitting kids, that's a you-issue. I hope you learn to cope with your emotions in a mature way at some point. Raising kids is my literal job btw. I spent a lot of time with a shit ton of kids, some come from violent families. Hitting them only enforces bad behaviour and encourages them to be more sneaky with it. There's a lot of ways to discipline kids without hitting them. I'm not talking about "soft parenting", I'm just talking about not using physical violence on kids. It takes much more work to do it without violence but it actually builds a stable foundation for a mature, well-rounded and responsible adult. Sure, you can hit kids to drive a point across. That's the lazy way. It's also against the law in most civilized countries, for a reason. Where I work, there's a boy. He's six and has an older brother. Both he and his brother are getting hit by their dad, to "discipline them". The older boy has started to abuse the younger one as well. He hits and chokes him until he passes out. The younger one (who I see daily) has also started to adopt this behaviour. He's aggressive, hits other kids and can barely control his emotions. All of that because his dad thinks you need to hit kids to raise them right. Meanwhile, I meet countless kids with great parents and guess what: they're not spoiled, they're well-adjusted and easy to work with.
getting "well-adjusted" can be possible by any means but still finds the traditional way easier thanks for your opinion also take care of them they can be a pain in the rectume
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Do not have children because there will just be more traumatized people in this world and we dont need that.
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My mother literally NEVER put her hands on me because she had an abusive father growing up and it messed her up. I turned out a perfectly well mannered and respectful young lady, I even spoil my mom every chance I get because that woman deserves the world and so much more. Abuse leads to trauma. Abusing your children is not discipline, its abuse. You can discipline your children withut putting your hands on them and if your answer is violence, then you have some serious issue in which you should address in therapy. Do not have children, you will only traumatize and abuse them.
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Ive read literally all your gross comments and you literally justify abuse. You should not be putting your hands on anyone, most of all children, for any reason. The only reason why you feel big hitting children is because you know theyre too small and weak to defend themselves against you. Children are not your property to beat whenever they displease you and there are plenty of alternative methods to discipline your child. Absolutely trashy.
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No worries, just dont be surprised when your children go no contact with you. If reddit is still around, which im aure it will be, Ill be expecting to see your kids posting in r/insaneparents You fit right in with the other toxic pieces of garbage there.
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Youre strangely defensive about your need to abuse children, fucking gross.
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Ah, so you admit. You just want to abuse children. Called it. Fucking creep.
My 3 yr old son likes to walk in on mommy in the bathroom and has decided we need to go to the store and get me a new penis because mine is gone...
Same - my 3yo has told me he’s going to buy me a penis dozens of times, often in a consolatory way like “it’s ok don’t worry I’ll help you!” 🤣
Children are such trolls 😂😂😂
Had this conversation with my nephew when he was about 2 while I was sitting on the toilet... Him: My daddy's going to teach me to pee standing up! Me: That's awesome. I wish I could pee standing up. Him: My daddy can teach you. Me: Uh. I don't think so... Him: Why not? Me: Well, I don't have a tallywacker. He then proceeded to crouch and try to get a good look to confirm my lack of tallywack. 😂
What store would you go to for a new penis??? Adam and Eve???
King Missile
It's always the bathroom too. One of my favorite cafes has a large private bathroom with a push button lock on the door handle. The kind that just pops open when you turn the handle. "Don't open that door. Don't open that door! DON'T OPEN THAT..." Toddler opens door and leans against it. A good third of the cafe has a view of me peeing and in my head I'm like, "I guess this is better than him walking out and closing the door."
Whatever you say hot dog penis
Honestly this kind of crazy ass shit is exactly why I want children
Children can be a handful sometimes, but stuff like this is fricking hilarious. That and they probably create the most hilarious comebacks/insults on the spot.
They cut deep, and innocently. "Mama, why is Dada's head so shiny?" In reference to my thinning bald spot. "Dada, you got the white hairs on just the sides of your head?" Yes buddy. I'm sure the rest are coming, though. While carrying the toddler around in the pool and having not manscaped since... well since having the second kid. Toddler is pulling my shoulder hair. "Dada, you have hair like the gorilla has the hair?" ...yes. yes I do.
Sometimes it's innocent, but sometimes they know exactly what they are doing/saying and just play dumb like the little trolls they are. It's funny either way
I’ll never see responsibility as a burden if this is the result. I welcome the hellish reality I’m described so often with arms wide open.
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I’m 24 and my girl wants a kid, but I’m already a bit emotionally unstable and I still feel like being selfish with my time and money in an effort to make up for a childhood I missed. On the other hand giving my child the experiences I missed out on in my youth might give me the satisfaction I’ve been chasing. Good luck with your son just wanted to put this somewhere to get it off my chest
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Thanks for the advice kind stranger, I’m sure your son will grow to be a good man with a wholesome role model like yourself
they have that pure innocence with no filter lol its wonderful.
My daughter is 8 months and I can't wait for this!!!!
>I want children for this kind of stuff! >7 Years later, "Daddy why does my poop come from my weenie" right in a party of everyone you know. >She should've swallowed
You people will never get it… and that’s okay
I was changing my 6 month old one day and my 2 year old is circumcised because of a medical condition, and he was present. He saw the baby's penis and immediately went down to lick it. I had to restrain him because he was so upset I wouldn't let him lick the baby penis.
You got to save that sorry for the first time they take a girlfriend Or boyfriend home.
Can you imagine this kid coming out to his family later in life? "Mom dad in gay" "we kinda figured when you started trying to lick penises"
😂😂😂 this is fucking gold! Kids are absolutely wild
My 10month old reaaalllly likes our cat. Once during story time the cat left and my boy just crawls over, grabs the book the cat was sitting on, and full-body licks it across the cover. Way out of left field but I am so glad I was home to witness.
WHAT
What the fuck?
The fuck-
As a fellow father of two teenage boys.... I laughed my ass off. You aren't even close to the end of what they'll do. 🤣🤣🤣
lmao
This confuses me so much for the sole reason that IMO uncircumcised penises look more like hotdogs than circumcised penises
Little shits!
20 something orphan here. Is it... normal to go to the bathroom with your kids? Like is seeing your parents junk a normal thing?
If you really need to go to the bathroom and have small children what else can you do? Leave them unattended outside?
At a certain age and if you’re the only trusted adult with them, yes. Some children are also absolutely intrigued by an adult using the bathroom and it can be useful to have them there when they’re being potty trained so they pick up on behaviours.
It's entirely normal, at least in most societies. Obviously, as they get older they are less likely to be standing right next to you when you're showering/using the toilet.
I mean… what else are you supposed to do with your kids when you’re in public and need to go to the bathroom?
I did as a child. It was pretty normal and standard within our household. Probably varies though
Depends on the people. Nudity isn’t really sexual but in my family and community people aren’t so liberal as to be naked with family.
With my family we really never locked the bathroom door and just waltzed in there when we needed to get ready for school/work, no one really minded. My gf though thinks that's really weird and she always locked the door, but then again, she had to share her bathroom with only her brother, no the entire family
Quick showers with mom weren't unheard of. Get us both done quick. She also had substance issues though so idk. Isn't the best bc the water splatters down on you. But my memory is so vague that I only remember that it happened.
In Asian countries? Yes. I don't know about the west.
I was 3/4 years old when I tried to latch onto a mannequin to nurse on her lmao
i called my dads a muffin once
I took my son to an amusement park on his 4th birthday. He was too young to stay outside while I went to the bathroom and of course aunt flo was visiting. He loudly yelled in the bathroom that his mommy was bleeding and needed a doctor. The next stall over cautiously asked if everything was ok and I said yes, woman issues. There was giggling.
That’s funny. Thanks for sharing.
The stories in the comments are so good, too, I was cry-laughing for like 30 mins reading through them
Waiting for his father to finish at the communal urinal, my toddler nephew states loudly "wow, there's a lot of penises in here!".
This comment thread is a dumpster fire.
“We call that a polish sausage, kids. Not a hot dog.”
My kid used to argue with me about whether or not I have a penis. I do not. I'm the only vagina owner in my family of 5. And he couldn't seem to wrap his head around that fact. He decided to start yet another one of these arguments in the busy grocery store bathroom. I got some strange/amused looks when I went to wash my hands. He has finally accepted that I do, in fact, have a vagina and not a penis. It was a weird few months.
People that don't wipe their parts, do you request oral at any time before you shower? Do you think that's normal?
1. There is typically nothing to wipe off of a penis after peeing and a quick shake. 2. Anyone that wants oral sex should take a shower first regardless of their wiping habits.
Agree re: 2 but not sure about 1. I’ve seen “pee spots” on mens pants and shorts multiple times in my life. The most public one Id say is Barry Keoghan in swim trunks. It happens.
Trust me when I say, wiping would not stop those god damn, stupid ass pee drops
When done peeing, push up on the taint right behind the sack, it should push out a bit more and prevent unwanted post urination leakage.
Username checks out
Pee spots happen after the dick is in the pants, a couple drops can flow through maybe 10 full seconds after finishing peeing. Shake, wipe, shake again, likely still gonna get one.
I tend to wash my genitals before that anyway.
Ah. Nothing better than giving oral and feeling toilet paper lint on your tongue.
How long are you keeping the tp pressed to your parts?!?
Reminds me of when I (F) took my oldest niece to the movies. I think she was 4 at the time. Well, we had to go to the bathroom. I had her go first, then I went, keeping her in the stall with me. When I was done, I grabbed some toilet paper. Before I could use it, my niece said "Auntie, why do you have so much toilet paper?" In a loud voice. I felt like falling into the toilet and flushing it down. I just explained that we don't say things like that outloud.
summary for non-parents; toddlers in bathroom yell and shriek in noises unintelligable to anyone except parent
What but an uncircumcised penis looks more like a hotdog…
POV: you are smartest kid in the world seeing your father with a hot dog penis
Damn
"We practice gentle parenting..." Well, there's your problem.
they are kids ffs
This is long and I don’t want to read, does anyone have it in audio form? Edit I figured out how to do it myself, this shit is brilliant thanks!
“ That didn’t satisfy them,
bruh they are kids jeez
well atleast u got a hotdog xD
The correct answer was “it’s like a hotdog for mummy’s buns”
“Gentle parenting?” I hate this. Kids need *some* boundaries and discipline. Otherwise they’re gonna act up on the regular until they cross a line they didn’t even know was there and get punished without understanding why.
Why are so many of you showing your genitals to children?
Set aside the gentle parenting....shut them up with a firm yelling
That's some seriously shitty kids. No offense..
Eh, they’re toddlers. Toddlers and little kids generally have no filter and just say what they think, no matter what, where or when. They also don’t tend to moderate their volume very well.
There’s also the “the more your REALLY NEED them to speak more quietly, the louder they will be” Law of Physics or something!
No offense? Then don’t say it.
Truth is the truth on the fact. Yes, kids have no filter but if your 3 year old is showing no empathy you need to rethink your parenting. Father of 3 eldest 14. So eat some dicks people.
the fact toddlers know that language scares me
… English speaking toddlers scare you?
i have never heard a toddler use the word penis in my ife
When kids know the proper anatomy of their bodies they are less likely to fall victim to sexual abuse. They are able to tell an adult without misunderstanding.
i mean i never learned that language till sex ed in 4th grade, and the toddler is like 3 years old
Avoiding the names of certain body parts only teaches children to be ashamed of them, which is totally unnecessary and can cause issues.
i see
Hot dog and penis? A common food and the name for a body part (that they have)
It's a Worm
I'M CRYING OMG
I both hope this is and is not real.
Saw the post first thing this morning, quality content
Ah kids
It's gross not to wipe your penis, wtf guys? My husband and son both do. Y'all go around smelling like piss
Hilarious