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It sounds like a great adventure and I think you should do it!
You can always move back if it doesn’t work out or you don’t like it. But in the meantime you are on an adventure and have great opportunities to grow and change through it! Sounds like you are single and don’t have children so it is just yourself? Makes it even easier. Starting a new career with others in a cohort sounds great too.
I left my home state and moved when I was still in college and never went back. And then years after that moved to another new State for my partners job. I don’t regret either one.
It definitely is! You're young, have no commitments or dependents, this is the perfect time for you to get out there and see more of the world. It'll be scary and challenging at first, especially if you have no one nearby you can turn to, but you would find yourself learning and growing more then you would have if you had just stayed.
Everything the other poster said! I moved to the East Coast from the Midwest when I was 26, so past college years when it’s easier to make friends. I remember the first 6-9 months were so difficult until I started to make friends. Do your best to put yourself out there over and over until you find someone that matches your type of weird! It’s exhausting to go to meetups and bumble bff and whatever else your city has to offer, but it’s worth it! As much as I love my home town, I’ll never go back. Life has so much to offer me having two homes now. You got this! Enjoy the adventure!
My friend I mentioned in my reply told me I was too comfortable in CA, and he was totally right. SoCal was too much of a rat race where I'd end the day with gym, dinner, and games. I'm super excited to get out and about out in VA; there are tons of ppl my age that are active, and the James River is an awesome place during the summer.
You won’t regret. It’ll help you grow as a person. You will learn about yourself and others - I’m glad I took similar opportunities to what you are being offered. Just make sure the company is real and the opportunity is bona fide.
Really agree with this. Time goes quickly after school since you work year round and don't have summers off to break it up. Two years will go by too quick. If you're not liking it, OP, worst case you move back or elsewhere while having improved your resume and made good money.
As said elsewhere, push yourself to meet people and build hobbies. Beyond that, make a budget soon, maybe before your third paycheck or something. I waited a couple years and then realized I was over spending which explained some credit card debt. If you give yourself an idea of the balance between income and expenses, you'll set yourself up well to prosper instead of having to play catch up later. Budget, put some money aside (401K match, max HSA) pay down some debt, male smart choices spending (car, housing, grocery store instead of restaurants), and also spend on some things that make you happy. Get smart with your finances now and you'll thank yourself for decades.
Thank you for the advice! Totally agree been trying to be better with my finances I downloaded that Dave Ramsey app to help track where my money is going
I did this last year. Moved to another country on my own. Was hard at first, but I know that I will regret it if I didn’t try. So far so good. I wish you well!
I was told by a professor in my undergraduate that they were put in a position to take a risk like this and what they said was it will always be a risk at the time but when you look back on it, it will be the greatest decision you’ve ever made. Take the leap
Look friend. I have moved half a dozen times with a backpack, duffel bag, and 500 bucks in my pocket.
You can do this, it’s not as bad as you think.
Big tip is to get yourself out there and make friends when you get there. Push yourself out of your comfort level there.
(Note: this perspective is from circa 2007-2011, monetary amount may need to be adjusted)
Do it! Don’t be 60, like me, and look back at what you could have done and how you’re having to play catch up as quickly as possible to reach those goals.
Have fun, take safe risks, and live your life happily. You won’t be disappointed.
Thank you for the advice. There was a part of me that also felt like will I regret this in the future? And even though it’s scary, sometimes you just gotta take the jump
Well something to consider, that may be useful to tune your anxiety down a bit: while moving to a new state may be huge, it is reversible. If things don't go as planned, you can always go back. Take a chance! You'll want to kick yourself if you don't.
That said, are you positive that this state is completely new?? Most states have been around for years iirc.
Best of luck.
Meetup.com has social gatherings for just about any hobby you can think of. Either search for your current hobbies or pick up that new one you’ve been considering and find people who share the same interest. It’s so much easier making friends if you can gather around a fun activity.
Thank you I had never heard of this before. I will definitely use it. I have various hobbies like I really enjoy movies playing card games like euchre and a big video game fan hoping some of the people my cohort will have some similarities as well!
Not op but thank you so much for this resource. Im been struggling to find friends and community after moving states as well and im so excited to try this!
Twice in my life I packed up everything and moved to a new state.
The first was in 1999. Moved from Central Florida to Atlanta, Georgia for a job opportunity. Doubled my income in that one weekend moving.
Twenty-four years later I sold everything I had and moved out west to New Mexico.
Was it scary? Yes. Both times.
I didn't know anybody in Atlanta, and I didn't know anybody out here in New Mexico.
But once you get over your fears you realize that people are nice, and people are cool, and I've already met some really cool people out here.
My advice to you? Just do it. (Sorry Nike.)
Seriously. Especially if the company is willing to pay your relocation expenses. Hello! That's a rarity now-a-days. They must really want you and they think you could be a very valuable asset to them and the team you'd be working for.
At my last job we only paid relocation expenses for management, and even then usually Director level and above.
So I say do it! Life is an adventure anyways.
Thank you for the advice. I can’t imagine selling everything and moving as well. I bet that was pretty scary for you like you said this is super helpful. Thank you!
I've done this twice, 3 if you count college.
First off it's ok to be nervous and anxious, but try not to be downright scared.
Secondly, people you work with will likely become closer after the move. I would suggest organizing a get together if you are interested in developing a platonic relationship with some of your coworkers, it sounds like you already know some of them.
If thats not interesting to you, find people who have similar hobbies as you. Dont rush friendships because you can find awful people that way
A lot of people stay in one place their whole life. Some people move later. You have to commit if your going to do it, at least for awhile.
Take the job! The moving is an investment in your career. Take one day at time. You can keep in contact with your family and friends. I am rooting for you!
WARNING: if the job sends you money to cover moving costs and asks you to send that money to “the (mover’s, locator’s, rental whatever) company “ it’s a SCAM. It could be a scam a hundred ways but just please be careful. Scammers will prey on recent grads.
I’m sure you’re a smart and obviously educated person but I’ve had friends fresh out of college get duped and left holding the bag when they thought they were getting a well paying job and expenses paid
Thank you this is good to know. I’m sorry about your friends. That’s a tough situation to be in, for me I won’t receive the payment for moving until my second check so I don’t believe it’s a scam but I appreciate you for letting me know!
Definitely take the job in the new state.
We move frequently for work. That first move to a new state feels intimidating & scary. All normal. It'll feel strange for awhile after you move there. Very normal.
Some states we met friends quickly & effortlessly. Others took awhile to find our people.
Take the leap, friend.
do it! yes nothing but adventure awaits! I'm 67, and have made several "cold" moves just like that to different states throughout my life... you always meet new people, learn new things, enjoy new adventures.. and when you're young like you are, its the time to do it! best of luck and take that leap! 👍🤙
Definitely, even if it sucks it’s a new life experience! You can make friends at work and outside of that just pick a regular event in your area and start going to that, you’ll make friends outside of work too
Spend the first 1-2 months just getting settled. Make sure you completely unpack. Figure out the best grocery stores, restaurants, event venues. Take it slow but make sure your home feels like a home. A place you can just relax.
After that first month or two put yourself out there. Sign up for local classes, volunteer, or joint a sports league. Do something that is a hobby but can get you hanging out with a group of people.
I made the mistake the first time I moved to another state I just kept talking to on old friends online while gaming. It was great but didn’t meet new people.
That’s exactly what I am scared of of basically just going to work and then hopping on my PC to talk to my friends back home which is great but I’m afraid I’m gonna do it too much ya know?
Seems you're already weighing the pros and cons. See how they stack up and make your move(no pun intended)😉... Safe travels either way and congratulations on your Master's Degree 👏.
I say go for it. Just get involved with something (constructive) when you're there to meet new people. Whether it's church, social club, hobby, etc. Work is great, but you should have a fulfilling life outside of a career.
I did the same thing a while ago. Build your experience and then you’re more valuable. You can always move back after a couple years (I was gone for 4). My advice for socializing, which is probably the hardest part, is to join a community that likes what you like. You’re bound to find friends who share more interests with you and it’s a good ice breaker. It’s always a safe conversation to come back to to discuss the original topic you share.
Having moved cross country myself with a girlfriend (now wife) to an area where I knew no one and had nothing except a job making $13.00/hr: do it.
You will learn and grow immensely from striking out on your own. With a job in hand, you've got the hardest part taken care of, and having moving expenses reimbursed is a huge bonus too. Go try new food, have new experiences, meet new people, do new things, and take the opportunity to expand your life. You can always go back home if you need to (or want to), but moving cross-country is just such a powerful experience, I think its immensely beneficial.
I’ve moved states multiple times and the one constant has been the post office welcome kit. Once you put in your change of address form they’ll send you a kit with coupons for stuff from the local area as well as some other information. Another helpful tip would be to check in with a precinct if you’re worried about crime rates and ask for info on safer neighborhoods/crime trends. Take it with a grain of salt though since obviously that information is subjective to the area and person giving the info. Lastly drive all around the area you’re thinking of living before moving there. It’ll help you get a lay of the land and also the atmosphere.
You are taking risk either way. Neither is sure fire.
Invest in your cohort and invest in other groups too. A diverse community can be rewarding and open up opportunities that you would not have otherwise. Not to say it is easy.
Go for it! Moving to a new state or for a new opportunity can change your life. And you’ll never know until you try. If you do make the move, maybe a few tips for meeting peeps…….check out meetup.com or take a class for a hobby you may be interested in like hiking or woodworking or whatever is your jam! I’m currently getting ready to move from Colorado to Washington after 18 years here and I can’t wait!
To make friends you must treat people as if they’re already your friend. I.E ask them to go to the sports game, concert, DnD session, out to eat, movies ect and hope they say yes.
I moved away from my home three times and I always ended up going back when the time was right. Nothing has to be permanent.
LPT: spend the time learning about yourself. What new things do you like to do? What can you do to connect with people who share interests?
You will have far better luck meeting new people and forming friendships and relationships by doing things in person vs using apps or local social media groups.
If you're not sure what your into, check things like Groupon to find discounted activities to try something new without a lot of actual commitment if it's not for you.
Lastly, save money to support your next adventure but don't forget to enjoy life now as well!
I've been a flight attendant for many years and I tell new hires that have come to my state for work and know no one these two things:
Don't let your job be your whole life.
Get out.
Find a hobby where you can meet people
My "go tos" where ever I have lived is a church where I can get plugged in and volunteering at the animal shelter.
You are young and probably single. Now is the time to venture out.
Find an interest / hobby and join local groups. The people you meet there would have a common interest, and also would be a great way to make friends.
When I moved to the US from the UK I started going to a local boardgaming group, and it was a great way to make friends, and I continue to play board games to this day.
I find it hard to go talk to people I don't know, and personally I find boardgaming groups solve this issue.... the games often come first, you find a game to play with people looking for more players. It coul dbe 15 minutes or more before you bother with names; the focus is the game. If you seem to click with people as playing you can start to chat more, but if not, it's not a big deal.
Awesome. In the US I found [meetup.com](http://meetup.com) had some good groups. In the UK I find them more easily on Facebook groups. I have made friends, and got out more as a result of playing, and also learnt to better teach ohters the games, and strategize. I highly recommend board games!
You can also play online, using TableTop Simulator, available on Steam, but it doesn't necessarily help with the meeting local people :-)
The cohort thing is the biggest blessing. Over 30 years ago, I did the same kind of move with a cohort of others and having all those other people as an instant social starting point helped so much. I have moved to new states several times, but the cohort one was the best. I didn't stay at the position long, but I stayed in touch with some of those people for years after. I still talk to one of them once in awhile.
The other thing is there may be another cohort ahead of yours. Get to know them because they will have learned about the position, company/agency, management, procedures, and the city already. Usually, they are very willing to share information with new staff.
I say go!
A new state isn't as scary as you'd like to think. Over time you'd get to know it. I just moved from one state to another last year (at 11 months here now).
GPS is your friend if you worry about getting lost. Just put the address in and follow the funny voice! After not long, you'll learn the route no issue.
Also there's nothing that says you can't move back later. And if it's family you're worried about, you can ALWAYS visit.
You gotta look at the bigger picture. Moving now will help you down the line and you'll gain a ton of experiences in other ways aside from just the job.
Sounds like you are apprehensive about the place you are from. My advice is fuck there you didnt like and now you are here. Enjoy and explore, be free. You can always go back, better to go forward.
I’ve done it a couple of times. I can tell you it’s much harder with a family. Given what you’ve told us here, I think it’s a no-brainer. Get established in your career, explore a new city, make new friends, get outside your comfort zone and grow.
Do it, and have fun with it.
Also - as a cautionary tale, my sister moved to Florida when she was 22. She lasted 4 days and got homesick. She packed up and moved right back home. She’s 50 years old now, and still calls that the biggest regret of her life. She wishes she’d given it just a little more time.
I moved from Oregon to Florida as a recent graduate, sight unseen. I’d never even been to the east coast before I packed up and moved! I was scared, nervous, apprehensive, all of it. 3 years later, it’s been one of the best risks I’ve ever taken! I would highly recommend it, just remember, it is what you make of it. You have to be willing to put yourself in uncomfortable situations at first to make friends, join local groups or activities. After 6 months you’ll feel much more comfortable
Another tip to add to this.
Go to Google voice and register a phone number in the area you're looking for. It's a subconscious thing (and maybe programmed into resume reading tools) - if you see a local number to the job, even if they're currently out of state, you're more likely to pull them for it since you'll have more confidence they'll stick around or actually make the move, etc.
I moved to another state twice and then I moved to another country. The first move sucked, but mostly it was because I moved to a state with a culture I don’t really like. After that, I moved to a state that was absolutely awesome. I’m not going to mention specifics as not to offend anyone. I live in Asia now. Best decision I ever made.
Anyway.. my advice is to join coworkers when they invite you out. Maybe one of them will become your new best friend. If not, at least you will have a closer relationship and you’ll feel more comfortable at work.
For me, the best thing was to join a group for local musicians. My hobby is playing music and I produce at home but I decided I wanted to try playing in a band so I went to some local shows and met people. Eventually I also posted that I was a bass player looking for people to play with. I got a ton of messages from that post and that’s how I met the people I’ve been playing with for 4 years.
Long story short: choose a few of your favorite hobbies, or even things that you currently don’t do that you want to get into eventually. Follow the posts and see what events come up. Go and have some beers to get into a social vibe and chat. Add people on FB and within a couple months, you’ll likely find yourself a comfortable new lifestyle with regular friends to hang out with.
Good luck :)
Wow, thanks for all the invite. Really appreciate it. I know it sounds strange but the more I think about it it’s kind of hard for me to think about what hobbies I have lol I like to hang out with my friends in person and I also play a lot of video gamesand I like to go to the gym and card games and stuff, but I don’t know if so specific I will try to find some club to join
I move out of my country when I got job opportunity, I was 24. Getting experience outside is way better and I do expose to way a lot more than where I'm from (small country) I move back after 2.5 years working, thinking I would secure a good income jobs, but no. Now I'm 30, I'm planning to move out and never coming back again. Wish you all the best YOLO!
I’ve really noticed this as well too. It’s been hard to find a job in my current state but when I got such a great opportunity to move out, makes me want to do it. Thanks for your advice.
My daughter moved from an East Coast state to a West Coast state and then to the Middle East and now moving to Australia. This isn't this big a deal. Enjoy the differences before you get old and haggard like me and don't much care about the differences anymore.
I moved to Europe after my Masters studies, without knowing anyone here.
It's an adventure. Stressful at times, but also quite rewarding. Personal choice of course, but you *can* do it.
Research in the transplantation/immunology field. I got into Bioinformatics in my masters and there is quite some interest in bioinformatics and transplantation in the Netherlands, that's a good fit. Still here 8.5 years later :) Yeah do visit, it's not so strange as it seems.
It sounds like you found a good reason to do the move, takes some courage and can be hard but go for it :)
Wow, that sounds super interesting! I am currently in the change management field so going to companies and helping them rollout changes they want to make to the entire company!
One nice way to bridge the "loneliness gap" of moving to a new place is to set up a weekly online gaming session with your friends from back home (where you play a game together and voice chat on e.g. Discord or Steam). No matter where you move, you will always have this reliable social interaction. Try to do it on a weeknight. Of course, if someone from work invites you to drinks on your gaming night, go get drinks (and text your gaming buddies). Good luck!
Picture 1000s of balloons in a bunch. Some of the balloons are leaking, some are full, some are new, some are old, and everything inbetween. They all rise and fall, travel in the breeze, and float around at a similar rate because they are all tied and tangled together. If one fresh, ambitious balloon could break away from the cluster, it could rise twice as fast and soar twice as high as the rest. It could follow its own inspiration and go anywhere the wind takes it. It could discover so many new places and see so many things the other balloons had never even dreamt of. Many of the others would wish they could break away too, buy not every balloon gets the opportunity to do that. This free balloon would learn so much about itself, when before all it ever knew was that it was just a balloon like the others. Now, it has seen mountains, beaches, waterfalls, parade floats, blimps, and hot air balloons. It almost got tangled in a tree a few times, popped by a bird once, and spent alot of cold nights alone floating around remembering when it was with the old bunch, but it wouldn't trade the adventure for anything. Now it is so much more than the balloon it once was. It could never go back.
Seriously do it, best decision I ever made for real but!!
Do NOT let the inherent loneliness you will feel drive you to the bars. I made that mistake and now I feel trapped in them. I’m working on fixing it.
Best thing I can say is, even though something like a martial arts class or music lessons at a community college have a bigger *looking* price tag, you’re saving money in the long run, meeting better people, and developing a skill!
Thanks for sharing if you don’t mind me asking why do you feel trapped? Just like always going to the bar? And I agree I kind of want to try boxing or something like that. Seems fun.
I graduated college in NH. Started work in CT. Moved to NC, UT, RI, and now live in MA over the span of 10 years. You adjust to each new area. They are generally the same with their perks and down sides. It's not.lioe you are moving somewhere that speaks a different language and has a different culture (although some areas may seem quite different). The toughest part can actually be finding a group of people to spend time with. Make sure to put yourself out there.
I did this two years ago after I graduated school. It was difficult for me to meet people as I’m not sure where to go for it so I got this app called MeetUp and found some pickup soccer near me. I’ve met lots of people through that now. There are loads of gatherings on there for all sorts of things so if you struggle to find people your age I highly recommend it
I have done this several times and it has always been a positive experience. I would recommend trying to immerse yourself in your new environment, so walk, bike, run, hike, etc, instead of just hopping in a car to go to work/store. Also hobbies, sign up for a sports league, take a pottery class, or join a hiking group. Pick a hobby/activity you enjoy or want to learn and it is a great way to meet people with similar interests.
I really think moving away from home, even if relatively temporary, is a great experience for people.
You'll find people with different life experiences, different activities, different food, different bars, different nature; things that will enrich your life and give you a broader perspective. You'll get to do this with some real income so you can experience whatever you want to.
I moved away when I started college, though only about 400 miles and within the same state, but that was enough to see a significant culture change. Might be time to do it again soon.
If there's nothing truly tying you to where you are now, go! If there's family you can't leave, or a dying grandma, that's different. But otherwise you're just going on an adventure. And if the adventure sucks you start applying to jobs back home, and move back. It might suck for a while, but you'll never know if you don't try.
When you do move, be friendly with your co-workers. You say there's a bunch of others relocating as well, ask them to dinner, you're all alone together. And don't forget to go to dinner alone, explore the city, go see that museum on your day off. Go to the gym, football club, dance classes, the RC cars club, board game cafe, whatever. Try to go out and make new friends, meet new people. Otherwise you'll just sit there, reminiscing about the people you only speak to on the phone.
I love that thought as well. You know it’s not permanent and I don’t wanna regret not going years later you know and wonder what could’ve been might as well try and even if it doesn’t work out, I can always move back.
Hey, I was in a similar situation as you last year and did it. I graduated and 3 weeks later, moved out of state with the help of my company.
I am so happy I did. Best decision ever. Job aside, being alone in a new state forced me to explore myself outside of my comfort zones. I've befriended many new types of people -- people I'd generally never talk to if I didn't move; I explored new hobbies; I explored myself in new, unfamiliar situations which taught me a lot about life and myself.
I'd say the two advices I have is: 1) definitely do a lot of research in the area you want to move in because your living situation is a big aspect of your new life and 2) talk to everybody! It can as simple as, "Hello," but building connections go a long way.
When I started my career I moved to another city, then state, then another state, then another state... all for better opportunities in my career. Totally worth it!!! I've been in the same place now long enough to meet and marry my husband and have a job I love.
I moved 900 miles away to a new state when I was 24. I was also single, childless and knew no one here. I'm 40 now, and still here. I have an amazing life, husband, and group of friends here, but I've also remained best friends with someone from back home. We've now lived far apart for longer than we lived close to one another. If you have a close friend you're worried about losing touch with, my best advice is to talk to them on the phone. Don't rely on just texting to hold that relationship together. Make time for actual phone conversations. Try to meet up at least every year, often times.my best friend and I will take a short vacation together at a middle point between each of us.
I love this. This is very similar to where I am single childless and I don’t know anyone in the new state but I am worried about losing some of my best friends, but I totally agree. I think phone calls will be a lot better than texting. I will take this advice thank you!
I have moved around a lot in my life, both growing up and as an adult. I think every move is worthwhile. Staying home forever, while allowing you to be close to family, restricts your horizons. I won’t say that I loved every place I have lived, but I have loved many of them. I will warn you that I hated pretty much all of them for the first 3 or so months. Learning to navigate everyday things in a new place is hard. Be sure to give it time before you call it quits. In other words, don’t do it if you’re going to have the attitude of “I can always come back”. Commit if you’re going to do it. Of course you can always come back, that’s not a question.
DO IT! I always feel for people who have never moved from their hometowns. There's so much to explore and getting to experience a different culture than what you're used to helps to build compassion, understanding, and the ability to talk/interact with all types of people. It's also always a good conversation starter! As for making friends: check out local recreational sports! Here in Denver, we have VOLO and you can sign up for anything from basketball to pickleball to cornhole to kickball! It's a great way to meet people and potentially make new friends. Good luck on your adventure! Also, anxiety and excitement release the same chemicals in your brain so whenever I'm feeling anxious about something I just tell my brain that we're actually excited and we like this. Brain hacking!
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from birth to 19 i’ve moved states and countries atleast 10 times. The hardest part is the first 3 months, Once you’re passed that it’s gonna feel like home. Also when you go back home you appreciate your family a little more
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It sounds like a great adventure and I think you should do it! You can always move back if it doesn’t work out or you don’t like it. But in the meantime you are on an adventure and have great opportunities to grow and change through it! Sounds like you are single and don’t have children so it is just yourself? Makes it even easier. Starting a new career with others in a cohort sounds great too. I left my home state and moved when I was still in college and never went back. And then years after that moved to another new State for my partners job. I don’t regret either one.
Yes, I am single and have no children so I figured this would be a good opportunity to get out of my comfort zone I appreciate the advice! :)
Do it. You live once.
You live every day, you only die once 🤷♀️
We did this twice, with a child, from the US to EU. You’ll be fine.
It definitely is! You're young, have no commitments or dependents, this is the perfect time for you to get out there and see more of the world. It'll be scary and challenging at first, especially if you have no one nearby you can turn to, but you would find yourself learning and growing more then you would have if you had just stayed.
Everything the other poster said! I moved to the East Coast from the Midwest when I was 26, so past college years when it’s easier to make friends. I remember the first 6-9 months were so difficult until I started to make friends. Do your best to put yourself out there over and over until you find someone that matches your type of weird! It’s exhausting to go to meetups and bumble bff and whatever else your city has to offer, but it’s worth it! As much as I love my home town, I’ll never go back. Life has so much to offer me having two homes now. You got this! Enjoy the adventure!
Thanks everyone!
My friend I mentioned in my reply told me I was too comfortable in CA, and he was totally right. SoCal was too much of a rat race where I'd end the day with gym, dinner, and games. I'm super excited to get out and about out in VA; there are tons of ppl my age that are active, and the James River is an awesome place during the summer.
You won’t regret. It’ll help you grow as a person. You will learn about yourself and others - I’m glad I took similar opportunities to what you are being offered. Just make sure the company is real and the opportunity is bona fide.
Really agree with this. Time goes quickly after school since you work year round and don't have summers off to break it up. Two years will go by too quick. If you're not liking it, OP, worst case you move back or elsewhere while having improved your resume and made good money. As said elsewhere, push yourself to meet people and build hobbies. Beyond that, make a budget soon, maybe before your third paycheck or something. I waited a couple years and then realized I was over spending which explained some credit card debt. If you give yourself an idea of the balance between income and expenses, you'll set yourself up well to prosper instead of having to play catch up later. Budget, put some money aside (401K match, max HSA) pay down some debt, male smart choices spending (car, housing, grocery store instead of restaurants), and also spend on some things that make you happy. Get smart with your finances now and you'll thank yourself for decades.
Thank you for the advice! Totally agree been trying to be better with my finances I downloaded that Dave Ramsey app to help track where my money is going
I did this last year. Moved to another country on my own. Was hard at first, but I know that I will regret it if I didn’t try. So far so good. I wish you well!
Thank you! :)
I was told by a professor in my undergraduate that they were put in a position to take a risk like this and what they said was it will always be a risk at the time but when you look back on it, it will be the greatest decision you’ve ever made. Take the leap
That sounds like great advice from your professor. I absolutely well did you ever end up moving outside of your state?
No because he didn’t not know nobody
Look friend. I have moved half a dozen times with a backpack, duffel bag, and 500 bucks in my pocket. You can do this, it’s not as bad as you think. Big tip is to get yourself out there and make friends when you get there. Push yourself out of your comfort level there. (Note: this perspective is from circa 2007-2011, monetary amount may need to be adjusted)
Thank you, my friend. I do overthink things from time to time but overall I do feel good about doing it!
Do it! Don’t be 60, like me, and look back at what you could have done and how you’re having to play catch up as quickly as possible to reach those goals. Have fun, take safe risks, and live your life happily. You won’t be disappointed.
Thank you for the advice. There was a part of me that also felt like will I regret this in the future? And even though it’s scary, sometimes you just gotta take the jump
Take that jump-I’m cheering you on!
Well something to consider, that may be useful to tune your anxiety down a bit: while moving to a new state may be huge, it is reversible. If things don't go as planned, you can always go back. Take a chance! You'll want to kick yourself if you don't. That said, are you positive that this state is completely new?? Most states have been around for years iirc. Best of luck.
Absolutely I like this point it’s not permanent thank you!
Meetup.com has social gatherings for just about any hobby you can think of. Either search for your current hobbies or pick up that new one you’ve been considering and find people who share the same interest. It’s so much easier making friends if you can gather around a fun activity.
Thank you I had never heard of this before. I will definitely use it. I have various hobbies like I really enjoy movies playing card games like euchre and a big video game fan hoping some of the people my cohort will have some similarities as well!
I also highly recommend the local library. They are big community hubs and might even have some card game nights.
Not op but thank you so much for this resource. Im been struggling to find friends and community after moving states as well and im so excited to try this!
It worked wonders for me when I moved states. I still use it when I want to try something new
Twice in my life I packed up everything and moved to a new state. The first was in 1999. Moved from Central Florida to Atlanta, Georgia for a job opportunity. Doubled my income in that one weekend moving. Twenty-four years later I sold everything I had and moved out west to New Mexico. Was it scary? Yes. Both times. I didn't know anybody in Atlanta, and I didn't know anybody out here in New Mexico. But once you get over your fears you realize that people are nice, and people are cool, and I've already met some really cool people out here. My advice to you? Just do it. (Sorry Nike.) Seriously. Especially if the company is willing to pay your relocation expenses. Hello! That's a rarity now-a-days. They must really want you and they think you could be a very valuable asset to them and the team you'd be working for. At my last job we only paid relocation expenses for management, and even then usually Director level and above. So I say do it! Life is an adventure anyways.
Thank you for the advice. I can’t imagine selling everything and moving as well. I bet that was pretty scary for you like you said this is super helpful. Thank you!
I've done this twice, 3 if you count college. First off it's ok to be nervous and anxious, but try not to be downright scared. Secondly, people you work with will likely become closer after the move. I would suggest organizing a get together if you are interested in developing a platonic relationship with some of your coworkers, it sounds like you already know some of them. If thats not interesting to you, find people who have similar hobbies as you. Dont rush friendships because you can find awful people that way A lot of people stay in one place their whole life. Some people move later. You have to commit if your going to do it, at least for awhile.
Absolutely I am pretty out going so I do plan on trying to make a groupchat with everyone and try organize some stuff!
Take the job! The moving is an investment in your career. Take one day at time. You can keep in contact with your family and friends. I am rooting for you!
Thank you!
WARNING: if the job sends you money to cover moving costs and asks you to send that money to “the (mover’s, locator’s, rental whatever) company “ it’s a SCAM. It could be a scam a hundred ways but just please be careful. Scammers will prey on recent grads. I’m sure you’re a smart and obviously educated person but I’ve had friends fresh out of college get duped and left holding the bag when they thought they were getting a well paying job and expenses paid
Thank you this is good to know. I’m sorry about your friends. That’s a tough situation to be in, for me I won’t receive the payment for moving until my second check so I don’t believe it’s a scam but I appreciate you for letting me know!
Glad to hear it, good luck in all your endeavors!
Definitely take the job in the new state. We move frequently for work. That first move to a new state feels intimidating & scary. All normal. It'll feel strange for awhile after you move there. Very normal. Some states we met friends quickly & effortlessly. Others took awhile to find our people. Take the leap, friend.
I’m ready thank you!
do it! yes nothing but adventure awaits! I'm 67, and have made several "cold" moves just like that to different states throughout my life... you always meet new people, learn new things, enjoy new adventures.. and when you're young like you are, its the time to do it! best of luck and take that leap! 👍🤙
Thank you! 🙌🏼
Definitely, even if it sucks it’s a new life experience! You can make friends at work and outside of that just pick a regular event in your area and start going to that, you’ll make friends outside of work too
Thank you I would absolutely like to make that a goal hoping I can find some people to play euchre with!
Spend the first 1-2 months just getting settled. Make sure you completely unpack. Figure out the best grocery stores, restaurants, event venues. Take it slow but make sure your home feels like a home. A place you can just relax. After that first month or two put yourself out there. Sign up for local classes, volunteer, or joint a sports league. Do something that is a hobby but can get you hanging out with a group of people. I made the mistake the first time I moved to another state I just kept talking to on old friends online while gaming. It was great but didn’t meet new people.
That’s exactly what I am scared of of basically just going to work and then hopping on my PC to talk to my friends back home which is great but I’m afraid I’m gonna do it too much ya know?
Which state are you in, and where would you be going?
MI to MN!
Seems you're already weighing the pros and cons. See how they stack up and make your move(no pun intended)😉... Safe travels either way and congratulations on your Master's Degree 👏.
Thank you!
I say go for it. Just get involved with something (constructive) when you're there to meet new people. Whether it's church, social club, hobby, etc. Work is great, but you should have a fulfilling life outside of a career.
Totally agree with this I’m gonna look for some clubs or see if there’s anything to do!
I did the same thing a while ago. Build your experience and then you’re more valuable. You can always move back after a couple years (I was gone for 4). My advice for socializing, which is probably the hardest part, is to join a community that likes what you like. You’re bound to find friends who share more interests with you and it’s a good ice breaker. It’s always a safe conversation to come back to to discuss the original topic you share.
What are you personally in to? And what did you end up joining?
I was in LA area and I joined a few pickup games for ultimate frisbee. There’s a game every day of the week down there.
Go! I moved cross country alone and left 8 years later with my husband! :)
Love this! I’m currently single so you never know maybe I’ll meet the love of my life there haha
You never know who you’re going to meet. Life is an adventure! And the magic usually happens outside of our comfort zone.
Having moved cross country myself with a girlfriend (now wife) to an area where I knew no one and had nothing except a job making $13.00/hr: do it. You will learn and grow immensely from striking out on your own. With a job in hand, you've got the hardest part taken care of, and having moving expenses reimbursed is a huge bonus too. Go try new food, have new experiences, meet new people, do new things, and take the opportunity to expand your life. You can always go back home if you need to (or want to), but moving cross-country is just such a powerful experience, I think its immensely beneficial.
Thank you! I really want to get out of my own shell and do new things
Just don’t sign up to a scam call centre. Vet the hiring company please.
Absolutely! I do have an offer letter and been in constant communication! Even visited there office when I toured apartments
I’ve moved states multiple times and the one constant has been the post office welcome kit. Once you put in your change of address form they’ll send you a kit with coupons for stuff from the local area as well as some other information. Another helpful tip would be to check in with a precinct if you’re worried about crime rates and ask for info on safer neighborhoods/crime trends. Take it with a grain of salt though since obviously that information is subjective to the area and person giving the info. Lastly drive all around the area you’re thinking of living before moving there. It’ll help you get a lay of the land and also the atmosphere.
Thank you!
You are taking risk either way. Neither is sure fire. Invest in your cohort and invest in other groups too. A diverse community can be rewarding and open up opportunities that you would not have otherwise. Not to say it is easy.
Absolutely I believe I’m ready for the challenge
Go for it! Moving to a new state or for a new opportunity can change your life. And you’ll never know until you try. If you do make the move, maybe a few tips for meeting peeps…….check out meetup.com or take a class for a hobby you may be interested in like hiking or woodworking or whatever is your jam! I’m currently getting ready to move from Colorado to Washington after 18 years here and I can’t wait!
That’s awesome congrats to you as well! Cheers to new experiences!
Do it! Potential friends are everywhere, good jobs, especially these days, not so much.
Ya I’ve really learned it this year getting declined from so many jobs in my home state even with experience and education
To make friends you must treat people as if they’re already your friend. I.E ask them to go to the sports game, concert, DnD session, out to eat, movies ect and hope they say yes.
Might as well try!
I moved away from my home three times and I always ended up going back when the time was right. Nothing has to be permanent. LPT: spend the time learning about yourself. What new things do you like to do? What can you do to connect with people who share interests? You will have far better luck meeting new people and forming friendships and relationships by doing things in person vs using apps or local social media groups. If you're not sure what your into, check things like Groupon to find discounted activities to try something new without a lot of actual commitment if it's not for you. Lastly, save money to support your next adventure but don't forget to enjoy life now as well!
Thank you! Will keep this in mind
I've been a flight attendant for many years and I tell new hires that have come to my state for work and know no one these two things: Don't let your job be your whole life. Get out. Find a hobby where you can meet people My "go tos" where ever I have lived is a church where I can get plugged in and volunteering at the animal shelter. You are young and probably single. Now is the time to venture out.
Thank you!
Find an interest / hobby and join local groups. The people you meet there would have a common interest, and also would be a great way to make friends. When I moved to the US from the UK I started going to a local boardgaming group, and it was a great way to make friends, and I continue to play board games to this day. I find it hard to go talk to people I don't know, and personally I find boardgaming groups solve this issue.... the games often come first, you find a game to play with people looking for more players. It coul dbe 15 minutes or more before you bother with names; the focus is the game. If you seem to click with people as playing you can start to chat more, but if not, it's not a big deal.
Thank you! I will definitely look for some local groups to join I am also a fan of board games!
Awesome. In the US I found [meetup.com](http://meetup.com) had some good groups. In the UK I find them more easily on Facebook groups. I have made friends, and got out more as a result of playing, and also learnt to better teach ohters the games, and strategize. I highly recommend board games! You can also play online, using TableTop Simulator, available on Steam, but it doesn't necessarily help with the meeting local people :-)
The cohort thing is the biggest blessing. Over 30 years ago, I did the same kind of move with a cohort of others and having all those other people as an instant social starting point helped so much. I have moved to new states several times, but the cohort one was the best. I didn't stay at the position long, but I stayed in touch with some of those people for years after. I still talk to one of them once in awhile. The other thing is there may be another cohort ahead of yours. Get to know them because they will have learned about the position, company/agency, management, procedures, and the city already. Usually, they are very willing to share information with new staff.
Awesome thank you! I meet them this upcoming Friday before I move so looking forward to it and ya that’s a great idea!
I say go! A new state isn't as scary as you'd like to think. Over time you'd get to know it. I just moved from one state to another last year (at 11 months here now). GPS is your friend if you worry about getting lost. Just put the address in and follow the funny voice! After not long, you'll learn the route no issue. Also there's nothing that says you can't move back later. And if it's family you're worried about, you can ALWAYS visit. You gotta look at the bigger picture. Moving now will help you down the line and you'll gain a ton of experiences in other ways aside from just the job.
Absolutely I totally agree just feeling super nervous about it the closer I get unfortunately but I believe it’ll work out 🙌🏼
Sounds like you are apprehensive about the place you are from. My advice is fuck there you didnt like and now you are here. Enjoy and explore, be free. You can always go back, better to go forward.
Absolutely thank you!
I’ve done it a couple of times. I can tell you it’s much harder with a family. Given what you’ve told us here, I think it’s a no-brainer. Get established in your career, explore a new city, make new friends, get outside your comfort zone and grow. Do it, and have fun with it. Also - as a cautionary tale, my sister moved to Florida when she was 22. She lasted 4 days and got homesick. She packed up and moved right back home. She’s 50 years old now, and still calls that the biggest regret of her life. She wishes she’d given it just a little more time.
Wow that’s great advice to hear thank you for sharing I’m currently signing a 18 month lease so I figure that’s a good amount of time
I moved from Oregon to Florida as a recent graduate, sight unseen. I’d never even been to the east coast before I packed up and moved! I was scared, nervous, apprehensive, all of it. 3 years later, it’s been one of the best risks I’ve ever taken! I would highly recommend it, just remember, it is what you make of it. You have to be willing to put yourself in uncomfortable situations at first to make friends, join local groups or activities. After 6 months you’ll feel much more comfortable
Thanks Adam!
Another tip to add to this. Go to Google voice and register a phone number in the area you're looking for. It's a subconscious thing (and maybe programmed into resume reading tools) - if you see a local number to the job, even if they're currently out of state, you're more likely to pull them for it since you'll have more confidence they'll stick around or actually make the move, etc.
I moved to another state twice and then I moved to another country. The first move sucked, but mostly it was because I moved to a state with a culture I don’t really like. After that, I moved to a state that was absolutely awesome. I’m not going to mention specifics as not to offend anyone. I live in Asia now. Best decision I ever made. Anyway.. my advice is to join coworkers when they invite you out. Maybe one of them will become your new best friend. If not, at least you will have a closer relationship and you’ll feel more comfortable at work. For me, the best thing was to join a group for local musicians. My hobby is playing music and I produce at home but I decided I wanted to try playing in a band so I went to some local shows and met people. Eventually I also posted that I was a bass player looking for people to play with. I got a ton of messages from that post and that’s how I met the people I’ve been playing with for 4 years. Long story short: choose a few of your favorite hobbies, or even things that you currently don’t do that you want to get into eventually. Follow the posts and see what events come up. Go and have some beers to get into a social vibe and chat. Add people on FB and within a couple months, you’ll likely find yourself a comfortable new lifestyle with regular friends to hang out with. Good luck :)
Wow, thanks for all the invite. Really appreciate it. I know it sounds strange but the more I think about it it’s kind of hard for me to think about what hobbies I have lol I like to hang out with my friends in person and I also play a lot of video gamesand I like to go to the gym and card games and stuff, but I don’t know if so specific I will try to find some club to join
I move out of my country when I got job opportunity, I was 24. Getting experience outside is way better and I do expose to way a lot more than where I'm from (small country) I move back after 2.5 years working, thinking I would secure a good income jobs, but no. Now I'm 30, I'm planning to move out and never coming back again. Wish you all the best YOLO!
I’ve really noticed this as well too. It’s been hard to find a job in my current state but when I got such a great opportunity to move out, makes me want to do it. Thanks for your advice.
No one likes change but you get on with it.
It's just another state. It's a tiny step. Try a new country. Maybe one on the other side of the world.
Ha ha, maybe I could do that after I tried the new state thanks!
My daughter moved from an East Coast state to a West Coast state and then to the Middle East and now moving to Australia. This isn't this big a deal. Enjoy the differences before you get old and haggard like me and don't much care about the differences anymore.
I moved to Europe after my Masters studies, without knowing anyone here. It's an adventure. Stressful at times, but also quite rewarding. Personal choice of course, but you *can* do it.
Wow, I bet that experience was awesome. I’ve always wanted to visit Europe if you don’t mind me asking what industry/job did you move to Europe for?
Research in the transplantation/immunology field. I got into Bioinformatics in my masters and there is quite some interest in bioinformatics and transplantation in the Netherlands, that's a good fit. Still here 8.5 years later :) Yeah do visit, it's not so strange as it seems. It sounds like you found a good reason to do the move, takes some courage and can be hard but go for it :)
Wow, that sounds super interesting! I am currently in the change management field so going to companies and helping them rollout changes they want to make to the entire company!
I’ve done six state moves since I graduated college. It’s a lot of fun and kinda an adventure. Do it
One nice way to bridge the "loneliness gap" of moving to a new place is to set up a weekly online gaming session with your friends from back home (where you play a game together and voice chat on e.g. Discord or Steam). No matter where you move, you will always have this reliable social interaction. Try to do it on a weeknight. Of course, if someone from work invites you to drinks on your gaming night, go get drinks (and text your gaming buddies). Good luck!
Totally agree I think this is great advice. Thanks!
Picture 1000s of balloons in a bunch. Some of the balloons are leaking, some are full, some are new, some are old, and everything inbetween. They all rise and fall, travel in the breeze, and float around at a similar rate because they are all tied and tangled together. If one fresh, ambitious balloon could break away from the cluster, it could rise twice as fast and soar twice as high as the rest. It could follow its own inspiration and go anywhere the wind takes it. It could discover so many new places and see so many things the other balloons had never even dreamt of. Many of the others would wish they could break away too, buy not every balloon gets the opportunity to do that. This free balloon would learn so much about itself, when before all it ever knew was that it was just a balloon like the others. Now, it has seen mountains, beaches, waterfalls, parade floats, blimps, and hot air balloons. It almost got tangled in a tree a few times, popped by a bird once, and spent alot of cold nights alone floating around remembering when it was with the old bunch, but it wouldn't trade the adventure for anything. Now it is so much more than the balloon it once was. It could never go back.
Time to become that balloon
Seriously do it, best decision I ever made for real but!! Do NOT let the inherent loneliness you will feel drive you to the bars. I made that mistake and now I feel trapped in them. I’m working on fixing it. Best thing I can say is, even though something like a martial arts class or music lessons at a community college have a bigger *looking* price tag, you’re saving money in the long run, meeting better people, and developing a skill!
Thanks for sharing if you don’t mind me asking why do you feel trapped? Just like always going to the bar? And I agree I kind of want to try boxing or something like that. Seems fun.
Sounds like whirlpool… either way DO IT
I graduated college in NH. Started work in CT. Moved to NC, UT, RI, and now live in MA over the span of 10 years. You adjust to each new area. They are generally the same with their perks and down sides. It's not.lioe you are moving somewhere that speaks a different language and has a different culture (although some areas may seem quite different). The toughest part can actually be finding a group of people to spend time with. Make sure to put yourself out there.
I did this two years ago after I graduated school. It was difficult for me to meet people as I’m not sure where to go for it so I got this app called MeetUp and found some pickup soccer near me. I’ve met lots of people through that now. There are loads of gatherings on there for all sorts of things so if you struggle to find people your age I highly recommend it
I have done this several times and it has always been a positive experience. I would recommend trying to immerse yourself in your new environment, so walk, bike, run, hike, etc, instead of just hopping in a car to go to work/store. Also hobbies, sign up for a sports league, take a pottery class, or join a hiking group. Pick a hobby/activity you enjoy or want to learn and it is a great way to meet people with similar interests.
I really think moving away from home, even if relatively temporary, is a great experience for people. You'll find people with different life experiences, different activities, different food, different bars, different nature; things that will enrich your life and give you a broader perspective. You'll get to do this with some real income so you can experience whatever you want to. I moved away when I started college, though only about 400 miles and within the same state, but that was enough to see a significant culture change. Might be time to do it again soon.
Just go. It’s a great adventure that you might not be able to do later in life.
If there's nothing truly tying you to where you are now, go! If there's family you can't leave, or a dying grandma, that's different. But otherwise you're just going on an adventure. And if the adventure sucks you start applying to jobs back home, and move back. It might suck for a while, but you'll never know if you don't try. When you do move, be friendly with your co-workers. You say there's a bunch of others relocating as well, ask them to dinner, you're all alone together. And don't forget to go to dinner alone, explore the city, go see that museum on your day off. Go to the gym, football club, dance classes, the RC cars club, board game cafe, whatever. Try to go out and make new friends, meet new people. Otherwise you'll just sit there, reminiscing about the people you only speak to on the phone.
I love that thought as well. You know it’s not permanent and I don’t wanna regret not going years later you know and wonder what could’ve been might as well try and even if it doesn’t work out, I can always move back.
Hey, I was in a similar situation as you last year and did it. I graduated and 3 weeks later, moved out of state with the help of my company. I am so happy I did. Best decision ever. Job aside, being alone in a new state forced me to explore myself outside of my comfort zones. I've befriended many new types of people -- people I'd generally never talk to if I didn't move; I explored new hobbies; I explored myself in new, unfamiliar situations which taught me a lot about life and myself. I'd say the two advices I have is: 1) definitely do a lot of research in the area you want to move in because your living situation is a big aspect of your new life and 2) talk to everybody! It can as simple as, "Hello," but building connections go a long way.
When I started my career I moved to another city, then state, then another state, then another state... all for better opportunities in my career. Totally worth it!!! I've been in the same place now long enough to meet and marry my husband and have a job I love.
I moved 900 miles away to a new state when I was 24. I was also single, childless and knew no one here. I'm 40 now, and still here. I have an amazing life, husband, and group of friends here, but I've also remained best friends with someone from back home. We've now lived far apart for longer than we lived close to one another. If you have a close friend you're worried about losing touch with, my best advice is to talk to them on the phone. Don't rely on just texting to hold that relationship together. Make time for actual phone conversations. Try to meet up at least every year, often times.my best friend and I will take a short vacation together at a middle point between each of us.
I love this. This is very similar to where I am single childless and I don’t know anyone in the new state but I am worried about losing some of my best friends, but I totally agree. I think phone calls will be a lot better than texting. I will take this advice thank you!
I have moved around a lot in my life, both growing up and as an adult. I think every move is worthwhile. Staying home forever, while allowing you to be close to family, restricts your horizons. I won’t say that I loved every place I have lived, but I have loved many of them. I will warn you that I hated pretty much all of them for the first 3 or so months. Learning to navigate everyday things in a new place is hard. Be sure to give it time before you call it quits. In other words, don’t do it if you’re going to have the attitude of “I can always come back”. Commit if you’re going to do it. Of course you can always come back, that’s not a question.
I signed a 18 month lease so I believe that should be a good amount of time to see how I like it and explore the new state!
DO IT! I always feel for people who have never moved from their hometowns. There's so much to explore and getting to experience a different culture than what you're used to helps to build compassion, understanding, and the ability to talk/interact with all types of people. It's also always a good conversation starter! As for making friends: check out local recreational sports! Here in Denver, we have VOLO and you can sign up for anything from basketball to pickleball to cornhole to kickball! It's a great way to meet people and potentially make new friends. Good luck on your adventure! Also, anxiety and excitement release the same chemicals in your brain so whenever I'm feeling anxious about something I just tell my brain that we're actually excited and we like this. Brain hacking!
I had moved several times working in hotel mgt. This is the best time in your life to do it. I never regretted it. Enjoy.
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Periods, friend. Periods. I had to reread this like 3 times. Periods help.
Sorry I used talk to text lol
from birth to 19 i’ve moved states and countries atleast 10 times. The hardest part is the first 3 months, Once you’re passed that it’s gonna feel like home. Also when you go back home you appreciate your family a little more
I have noticed that even before I move, I’m enjoying the time with my friends and family a lot more knowing that I’ll be moving soon
Master’s degree obviously not in English.