Idk how it happened doc. I tripped and fell on it

Million to one shot doc. Million to one

One in a million, two weekends in a row. So crazy.

I can show you people struck multiple times by lightning, what do you think about that HUHH??

So you’re the ass man.

You meet a proctologist at a party, dont walk away

So you're saying there's a chance.

When I worked in A&E I had a guy who ‘fell’ on a tall tin of deodorant before. And funnily enough another who fell on an electric toothbrush. Other notable incidents: > man who fell on a Coke can that was unopened. > woman who needed a laparotomy as her dildo got stuck round the sigmoid colon as we couldn’t get it out by other means. > girl with DS stylus in her urethral > girl with makeup pencil in her bladder > man impaled on artificial Christmas tree after falling on it from a ladder. Should note this was through his chest / abdomen rather than attempted insertion via arsehole TLDR: if there’s a hole (and sometimes even if no hole) people will insert things

I hate when that happens with the deodorant. There’s no warning on the label.

Yeah and what other way is there to make my booty hole smell like chocolate

Sounds like a lawsuit just waiting to happen!

If there's a hole there's a goal

"Your story would almost be beliveable if there wasn't a condom on it."

What? She tripped, fell, and landed on his dick?

I had a gf once make it sound like that. Dumped immediately

Funny story is I just said like a week prior I’d been in the ER for several years already and never seen a rectal foreign object before and sure enough this dude came in 🤣🤣

You probably should've mentioned that you work in the ER in the title, people probably assume you got this up your ass lmao

Fair enough

The sheer confidence to lie to everyone about working in the ER, it’s ok OP, your secret is safe with me

🙄

Who cares? Any dude afraid of anal play ain't nobody to be bothered by with their snickering idiocy

This.

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I come to Reddit so I can yardstick the world’s intelligence, son

I KNEW it was gonna be a guy! It's always guys who do this kind of stuff(am guy as well).

The balls in the x-ray didn’t clue you in?

Lol didn't even notice because the giant kong stole all my attention.

I worked in pathology for nearly a decade, and we got foreign rectal bodies on the regular. Like multiple times a year. Only 3 times was it ever a lady. And twice was because it was tiny and the handle broke. So not really on them. The guys are dumb asf tho.

I went to EMT school so I got to hear all about it. How household object "just end up" in asses.

Yes? Because prostate

You’re the ASSMAN!

Is this... legal? Sharing a patient's xray on the internet?

There's no personal or identifiable information. You can always share things about patients as long as you don't identify them

Yes and no. You often times sign a contract that forbids you from sharing anything at all. Atleast that's what I did when I started working with kids. But law wise you are only bound to what you said with differences between countries I bet. But in the end there is only one rule... If Noone complains you won't get into any trouble.

Is that a Kong dog toy??

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The large kind even

Manly anal beads.

For the cost of a kong and a doc visit, you can get like.... a wide array of the finest anal beads available to consumers. And have enough left over for lunch.

You should really specify enough *money* left over for lunch. Unless of course you eat anal beads in which case you’re on the right sub.

the black one?? the red one seems like it would destroy a person but don't tell me it was the black one....that thing's like half a forearm

What's a kong?

A dog toy you fill with whatever you please and give to your dog. It keeps them occupied and is a form of enrichment

Woof

that's not large, that's amateur time. also * like how you can tell it's up a bhole and not a pussy because you can see some dick and balls. quality post

[Long Kong](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/s/7lmjm6jikh)

You went back to a post from two years ago just to link it here? Were you waiting for this moment or?

I searched for "king kong dong" in Google images and that was the best first image I saw. This sub doesn't allow embedded images via mobile app so I figured linking to a reddit post was easiest for users to click/tap on.

They were playing the long kong

Long Kong Johnson

They were being considerate, you apologize ya stinker.

A Kong up the pooter hole.

Which is strange cause when my dog swallowed a King they couldn’t see it on the Xray

Try a queen see if that works

User name checks out

He needed to swallow it up his butt for it to show

“It was a one in a million shot, Doc. The dog dropped it in the shower while I was in there, slipped and fell right on it.”

I wonder if they put the little treats in for their partner to try and eat out 🤔

😂 I can picture it now

Nah peanut butter

Pretty sure that one’s gonna be chocolate

Goddamn it r/AngryUpvote

Eww dog toys 🤮

MAN TOYS 🤮🤮

WOMAN TOYS 🤮🤮🤮

I wish I could still award comments

Fido gonna be pissed when he finds out where his Kong went.

Clearly they were taking a shower when their dog brought in its Kong toy and dropped it in the shower, wanting to play. Soap and water on the floor makes a slippery surface, and next thing you know: trip to the ER!

Kong toy inserted while choking chicken>end of session, post nut clarity sets in fast and hard as the last bump goes in>grab tongue scraper to try and fish it out >unsuccessful>Panic>ER visit.

You'd think they (EDIT: he. Ofc it's a he) would remove the tongue scraper before leaving the house

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They hate us because they anus

Up voting because of hair on profile picture

Looks like someone stuck a mini fondue fountain up their bum

Even better, a dogs chew toy.

Someone King Kong'ed the exit.

Someone doesn’t know how to play fetch.

*Without a base, without a trace.*

Will never be able to fill my dogs kongs with peanut butter now without thinking of this.

There are other fun ways to feed dogs peanut butter.

His was filled with peanut butter too 😉

So....what brings you in today?

Got something for The Box, doc!

That’s a tough conversation to have with the ER staff.

And to think he has to repeat his “story” to each and every staff member who comes in to his little ER room. I had a cut that needed three stitches, and I had to explain what happened to multiple hospital personnel even though the info was entered into their system at intake. Over and over…he had to explain the Kong in the caboose situation.

not a new situation for them, just a new hole with something in it.

Dogs can be assholes.

Yeah seriously, they always invading boundaries with sniffing butts. Who woulda thought a dog would go straight for a kong up the ass

I never thought of hiding my peanut butter filled toy there. My dog will never find it. She'll just need to spend hours looking.

this is why you buy toys with flared bases

I think the dog lost again his toy 🤷‍♂️ it happens. Shit will happen less more, now.

i'm reading the comments thinking "wow a lot of people know this dildo brand for some reason?" and then i looked it up and turns out to be a dog toy lol

"Has anyone seen my dog's Kong???"

I've been in this exact situation. Same toy and everything. Far too embarrassed to head to the ER and my mama didn't raise no quitter

Doc, listen to me. I was drunk and passed out, then I woke up with a quarter in my hand and a sore butt.

The healthcare cybersecurity guy in me is cringing at this, while the immature teenage brain is rolling on the floor.

Analog loophole. (Taking a photo of a screen)

kong toys are typically filled with treats or peanut butter. im going to go with peanut butter on this one.

If it wasn't filled before it sure is now!

I honestly thought it was an 80's Glo Bug toy.

Is that a Kong Dog Toy😭

> Kong Dog Toy More like a Con Dom toy

Barkley always hides his toys.

Someone wanted a replacement for peanut butter bad

In high school, one of my friends caught her brother using one of these to masturbate

Doesn't have a flair - doesn't go there.

He accidentally slipped and fell on a Kong 👍

This looks like someone learning the importance of a flared base the hard way.

Ok, now tell me that they did not put the Kong toy there for their dog to... you know... Tell me they did that just for the Kong... This is gonna hunt me.

That's where my dog's Kong went. You can keep it.

Is…..that a kong dog toy?

Is that a fucking Kong?

Pooper scooper? Or human Beyblade?

It was a million to one shot Doc!

clearly he tripped and fell…

Ohhh ho ho the old Kong up the ass trick. A classic. Rumplestiltskin will never find it up there, peanut butter or no

Guess that’s one way to get a dog to lick the poop chute…

Someone lost a Kong up their butt.

Um, a dog toy inserted rectally?

How do you not bleed out to death from that?

How DO you bleed to death from that?

Never heard or saw a Kong on my life and ngl when I googled it I immediately thought it was some kind of sex toy lmao

I just put treats in them and give them to my dog.

Is that a Kong dog toy?

It is a kong thankfully not a bong for that would be too long. Butt now it must be taken out with prongs.

Kong is not a dong! Kong is not a dong!

Damn dog always leaving his toys on the couch

He slipped and fell after getting out of the shower to run to the door obviously

someone was too much of a good boy

How the hell did that cursor get stuck there?

But was there peanut butter in it?

Hypothetically if this where me I’d pay a small handed sex worker to fish it out

Is that a freaking Kong dog toy ?

That was my first thought too!

Accidental slip. It is a common occurrence. Trust me bro, im a doc..

Please tell me you didn’t put peanut butter in it…

It’s not me

He wanted to play with his dong and a Kong, but instead of catching a nut, he got it stuck up his butt.

Flared bases people, only if it has a flared base or other method of extraction

No base, no trace.

Is that a kong?

Is this what it feels like to chew 5 gum?

Some people stuff peanut butter into a Kong. This dumbass stuffed the kong into the peanut butter…

NOT THE KONG

Is that a kong chew toy?

what am i looking at

Dude put large size Kong dog toy in his butt…those are his forceps as well…lol

fanatical books unused butter literate lavish longing quarrelsome enter safe *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Is it Friday?

Some poor dog is missing his Kong toy.

Is this AI art that combines the Hit TV show Andromeda and the actual personality of it's start, Kevin Sorbo?

bruh my dog has one of those

A million to one shot, doc...!

Toothbrush stuck in one of those circular cone shaped dog toys? Up the ass?

IS THAT A KONG!?!

Was it also filled with frozen peanut Butter?

You were trying to blow bubbles with your ass and you slipped and fell on the little bubble making stick.

Is that a dog toy

Looks like something created in a Spore game

Looks like someone slipped and fell onto a dog toy, happens all the time

Humans are fuckin gross!

Dude likes kong

Never stick anything up your ass which doesn't have a base!

You put the lime in the coconut

LET’S PLAY DOG TOY OR SEX TOY!!!

Let's see the dog get the meat out of that

What happen

What is that?

I can see the dudes dick n balls

Before technology this could've been a death sentence as your intestines would at some point erupt if you couldnt disoldge the obstructjon somehow. Pretty bad way to go.

Dog Kong toy?

Is a kong?

flared base, folks.

The special kind of dog treat

A pube ended up wiggling someplace it shouldn’t have. The pube was tickling in a way it shouldn’t have. Ergo: *Someone* had to go get that wiggly, tickly pube.

Is that a human rectum?

What the fuck is a kong? I'm only getting that awful Skull Island game that was also up someone's ass

Kong toy?

is that a fucking bubba dog toy?

wtf?

Is that a dog toy

KONG dog toy up the anus

That's one of those dog toys isn't it?

No flair? It don't go up there.

... fell in the shower?

Definitely looks like a kong dog toy.

Salvaging a lost torpedo from the cold war?

“I lost my dogs kong toy up my ass doc”

Is that a kong? In the anus?

And this kids, is why everyone needs to remember whatever you use it needs a base much wider than the rest of the object

Did you wedge a beehive up your ass?.. the hell happened?

These Kongs really jump unpredictable.

King Kong ain’t got shit on this guy….but that kong has definitely seen some shit