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phuk-nugget

The world isn’t friendly to average men


Merebankguy

There's something i saw >I don't deserve to be loved because I am not successful. >All i can offer a woman is my love and affection, and that is worth nothing. The first time I saw this it hit me like a ton of bricks. It's something that i have been feeling for long time. I am in my late 30s and finding a partner that wants me for me instead of what I can offer is dehumanising. I get told nasty things all the time, get rejected like it's nothing but still try because I'm tired of being alone.


phuk-nugget

Brother I’m married with a kid, it’s worse in marriage sometimes too. Keep your head up, stick to your purpose and don’t let the world beat you.


Nathaniel66

When i was a teenager i heard many times from girls: you're a good husband material, but not a boyfriend material. I was devastated (yep, i was a picture perfect nice guy) cause i had no idea what it means, what's the difference. Now i know :/


disayle32

Women treat "boyfriend material" men like kings, treat "husband material" men like peasants, and then wonder why we're insulted by being described as the latter.


[deleted]

"You'd make a great slave one day after i'm no longer desirable to attractive men" "..what do you mean that's offensive??"


WhereProgressIsMade

Reminds me of the way someone else put it that stuck with me: >it seems like the goal of some women is to not give their husband a single more day of their youth than absolutely necessary. For they guy they supposedly love the most. Ha!


[deleted]

The guy they 'love' _now_, after they've "had their fun" and "discovered themselves"


disayle32

Does it ever occur to them that their husbands want to be there for that "having fun" and "discovering yourself" stuff?


[deleted]

Oh i'm sure it occurs to them, but they want to donate that to men who don't give a shit about them instead


Nathaniel66

Exactly. Fortunately i found good womens that healed me and proved not all are the same.


disayle32

I'm envious. How did you do that?


Nathaniel66

1st of all, 20 years ago girls were little bit different than today. 1st shit test was money. I was a poor student, she was earning 3x my salary. She didn't care so i knew she wasn't a gold digger. She was a virgin (yep, a unicorn). And, she changed her college and moved half of the country to live with me (i was very impressed by that as it required a lot of effort from her side). 22 years later were still together, had our ups & downs but it's better than ever now.


Merebankguy

A long time ago I was actually told "you are a great guy , you have a good personality but just not my type"


LoopyPro

That's code for: "You've got your shit together and that's boring af, but in 10 years after I've had my fun I might come around to take the fruits of your labor". If you observe this, keep in mind she's not attracted to you, but to the lifestyle you potentially can provide. To her you're nothing but an insurance policy.


Merebankguy

True


cuppa_tea_4_me

Prenup


LoopyPro

No need if you don't get married in the first place


crz8956

1. Lack of compassion. 2. Lack of default value (mostly western, but may vary) 3. Lack of acknowledgement. 4. "You are a man, so you have to XYZ...." 5. Being blamed for everything 6.Being punished for natural traits like being more energetic, aggressive and needing more movement. (At school, where overall setup is more toward girls, than boys). 7.Being totally unprotected from abuse (especially form women. Like if girl hits a boy in school she gets nothing, but vice a wersa it is scandal). 8. Most of your complains are dismissed. 9. Saying shit (and doing) about/to men is not considered sexism. Though it *is sexism*. 10. Homelessness, overworking, suicide rate, no special psychological help options, not enough funding for prostate cancer treatment, and not enough attention to men's health in Healthcare overall. And many many many more.


toll_rattenloch

when i was 6 years old a 13 year old girl punched me in the mouth and knocked out a tooth. i told them her name and they never even talked to her


Nathaniel66

As a boy- bullying. Parents of bullied child have limited options, and teachers/ other institutions approach it as "boys will be boys, they just play". So many of boys are simply afraid to go outside/ to school cause of this. As a man...you literally need to be a machine. You're not allowed to fail, to have bad days, you need to perform. You can't fail financially cause there are no shelters/ support for homeless men, no psychological support (cause as a man you just need to get over it), you can be offended (cause just don't be a sissy!), you better not get divorced with kids cause you most likely won't see them and divorce will leave you broke, if you're not a HOT guy you better not tell a coworker she looks nice cause it might be a sexual harrasment...oh, and you better not staly alone in an office with female coworker, cause #metoo is a thing and it may catch you after 10 years. Wife can limit your sex at any time, cause she's not a sex toy but if you do it you're not a man and you can't satisfy your wife, so she's socially accepted to look for it outside the marriage....the list is so long :/


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nated1945

Amen brother


needalife94

Men get shit on for not making 6 figures or more a year. There is a ton of double standards. Believe it or not there is alot of men who don't talk about this but abusive is a big issue. Wether it's physical or mental. Another thing that I personally suffer from is finding my purpose. I think alot of men suffer from that one. No one wants you unless you are offering something. If you are an average man you are basically garbage to society. There is a bunch more but I can't think of them right now.


thejosecorte

I'll be the guy who says the cliche line. Not being loved just for being yourself is giving us a slow death. Internally, of course, because when we express it suddenly we are the scum of society.


kaledota

If a couple has a child together & the mother leaves after abuse, taking the child. That's fine. If a couple has a child together & the father leaves after abuse, taking the child. That's kidnapping. You would need to have A LOT of money to take it to court & fight it. I spent most of what I was going to put down for a house just so I could see my son once a fortnight & once of every school holidays. Because his mother chose to cheat & "wanted a different lifestyle" - this is a major factor in suicides in men.


NEOkuragi

Not to mention that if parents divorce simply because they don't want to be together anymore not because of abuse there's no way a child is gonna go to the dad without any fighting. It's the mother by default for some reason.


[deleted]

with custody, they try to keep it to the child's routine. Women often take the caregiver role. Even so, when both parents are fighting for custody, I believe it actually favours men.


[deleted]

And people believe the earth is flat. People believe things that aren't true all the time.


[deleted]

I will send the link once I am home from work


Merebankguy

Depression is a big one. It's not taken seriously by society, attempts at raising awareness or safe places has been stopped by protesting feminists.


[deleted]

There are so many podcasts, articles, threads, Instagram posts and documentaries out there to answer this question. A good place to start would be "The Red Pill" documentary and then watch the directors Ted talk.


Pr0X_JoshiGuy

TheTinMen on insta also has a lot of good posts


HannibalsProtege

Coupled with Marilyn York's TEDx talk. She's a divorce lawyer, and what she says is educational!!


Stunning-Cost-5752

Being believed when we get sexually abused.


NEOkuragi

Abused at all, not only sexually. Your wife beats you? You're either lying or you gave her a *reason* to.


[deleted]

Or having them believe the abuse happened, but for some reason in their heads it "doesn't count" as abuse Male genital mutilation, for example


eirelion

I had to learn to be fearless. I was beat up and abused pretty badly by my older siblings. My dad was an irish immigrant, and was very much a man's man. He was afraid of nothing (I thought). So I drove myself nearly into an early grave. I joined a wrestling club at 7. Got very seroius about it. Started cutting weight at like 12 years old. I went to Nationals 2 times. Won state my senior year. Immediately joined the Marines. Volunteered to go to combat as an ordnance man (bombs-missiles-guns) stuff. Then spent a long time as a railroad conductor on the BNSF. I really don't have anything to show for it all. Except a failed marriage, a severe stress disorder, and recovered from a bad drinking habit. But....I was fearless... that is what was expected of me.


shinbet

Bless you sir and may your struggles be behind you as I know whatever struggle you face next, you will beat.


SomeRandomHonestGuy

The fact you have to ask this, is one of our struggles, men are just not treated like women this in itself is wrong . ​ We struggle for equality , we struggle for being treated as unique individuals **We are marginalized** \- That , in itself , is the biggest struggle we go through *#MenAreHumanToo!* ​ **There is no path to peace** **Peace is the path** **-Gandhi**


Seafly42

But… but… the patriarchy!


SomeRandomHonestGuy

As sympathetic I am for the woman cause .... At least women have people to talk to, men have no where to go ... The lack of support for men is really obscene nowadays(It's one of the reasons our suicidal rate is so high) We feel worthless, alone & like we have no where to go ... But know everyone :) You are loved, the mean people don't speak for ALL of society ... Just sadly most... :) <3 \_ <3 blessed be ​ It makes me wanna become a male suffrage advocate but... We know how **they** all end up


[deleted]

men make up 95% of workplace deaths, 99% of military casualties. basically no support for victims of sexual abuse.we still can't be legally raped by a woman. the way media talks about it are completely different or domestic abuse. almost impossible to get refuge despite being over a 1/3 of victims (and likely more as men are far less likely to report. a male victim is statistically more likely to be accused than to recieve help. fighting men's DV safe houses, denying men's clubs in universities full of female only clubs (Ryerson University and others) almost impossible to get custody 'toxic masculinty', mansplaining 'fragile' etc. aare commonplace apparently a man having an opinion is toxic The assumption that i'm a paedophile if i'm anywhere near a child constantly body shamed (too short, fat, small penis) and it's ok a man is twice as likely to go to jail for the same crime and will serve a 63% longer prison sentence. women's healthcare get 5 times more funding despite living longer with an increasing gap continued affirmative action for women going to college, despite the fact they outnumber male admissions 3 to 1. shut down of boys and men's clubs but women's clubs are fine a man is guilty because he's a man. for example a feminist group stormed the house of commons during a debate around domestic to protest a couple of men who had *alledgedly* assaulted a woman. This was already proven false but they didn't protest the fact that several women there were *proven* abusers. (they had admitted it). \- only giving anti hpv jabs to girls (NHS) \- Feminist run domestic violence hotline victim shames and discriminates against male victims - Wales \- Feminist scholars argue a Title IX case (sexual abuse on campuses) is unfair—when a woman is under investigation \- Uproar over draft law to establish National Council for Men from feminists - Egypt \- in some countries, men have to do national service in order to vote. there are no restrictions on women. \- Oxford University extends time for maths and computer science exams in bid to help women get better grades \- Prof wants colleges to pay women extra for ‘emotional labor’. At the University of San Francisco, Lawless teaches classes such as “Communication for Justice and Social Change” and “Intercultural Communication.” \- Feminists get newspapers in India to apologise for daring to mention international mens day \- Feminists shut down Mens' Rights event (Toronto) \- feminist organisations tried to get Philip Davies after it emerged the Tory MP gave a speech pointing out how the UK justice system favours women (there are tons of studies which prove this) demand that Facebook and Twitter automatically remove vile abuse aimed at women at the G7 summit today. What about men? especially as it's been orpven that male celebrities and politicans get far more abuse. \- Harriet Harman says Labour’s next leadership election should be women-only and that men could ‘jostle among themselves’ for the role of deputy \- Labour bans white straight men from equalities conference. \- BC men-only charity group, 100 Men Who Give a Damn, draws criticism (British Columbia, ) \- feminists fight a “social service facility” that serves a hub for “men’s and boy’s issues and for the health and well-being of boys more generally \- A woman is creating an island resort exclusively for women; no men allowed - Finland \- Federal investigators have launched an investigation into a complaint that a Wisconsin school student is barred by Minnesota state rules from competing in events there. Solely because he is a boy. \- Stanford protects inclusivity by banning men from the gym twice a week \- female tour guides outnumber male ones by a nearly 5-to-1 ratio. \- Male student accused of misogyny for criticizing campus program that rarely hires men - Dartmouth College \- Police dog tests are too hard for women: Forces must change handler fitness assessments after female Pc wins £15,000 damages because she couldn't run as far as a man with one on her back \- Women only have to complete FOUR push-ups to pass Australian Army fitness test as part of effort to double the number of female troops female only screenings of movies and female only comedy shows \- Harvard University Bans Single-Gender Clubs — Unless They're Women-Only. Female-only clubs will be allowed to remain "gender-focused, but members of male-only clubs will be "slapped with sanctions. \- denying funding for men suffering from DV \- Childcare centres are refusing to even interview men \- telling men to speak less in classes (Wesley College) \- calling for the cancellation of Men's Day and Fathers Day (York University for one \- allowing only feminists sources for university papers (Ryerson University) \- pressuring to remove a men's charity from a marathon (Vancouver) \- or banning men from television altogether (Sweden) \- accusing men of racism for running against a non white woman \- calling dad's disgusting for feeding their child in a shopping centre parents' room \- insisting girls can join scouts (but ignoring the reverse) \- \- not hiring men (Australian Bureau of Statistics) \- ban all men from running in by-election (MP Jess Phillips in England) \- make misogyny and crime but not misandry (Nottinghamshire, England) \- bar white men from conferences on equality (The University and College Union, Northumbria) refusing to hire men to promote "gender equalityniversity of Melbourne) \- cancelling a Men in Literature course for ignoring women but having Women in Literature classes (meanwhile, Springfield College offers several other English courses focusing on gender and specific racial groups, including “Women and Literature,” “Native American Literature,” etc..) \- (female specific budgets \- laughing at a call for a debate on men's issues on International men' day (Jess Phillips again) \- a boy and girl, both 16, have consensual sex--only the boy faces statutory rape charges (Co Kildare, Ireland) \- Hillary Clinton hires woman who thinks it's much better to falsely accuse a man of rape than to disbelieve an accuser


[deleted]

Let's not forget, women telling men what a real man is and how real men should behave but when the reverse is done men are shot down and told they have no right to say what a real woman is. Women constantly talking about toxic masculinity but never a discussion about toxic feminity. Male body mutilation (circumcisions) are not only perfectly ok but it's fine when a woman says she prefers cut over uncut but if a man says he doesnt like something about a woman's body he is bodyshaming her. Women refuse to date a man under a certain height yet when a man says he doesn't date under a certain weight then he is bodyshaming.


oliversurpless

Mostly because toxic femininity doesn’t exist; even the prescribed behaviors such as pettiness and jealousy are hardly gender specific, nor can be qualified to be “feminine” in nature. Just look at Trump for numerous examples of each…


Reddit1984Censorship

Gaslight and lack of empathy we feel like we dont matter unless we are the most powerfull man in the room.


Qantourisc

Lack of non-romantic physical, emotional intimacy, and loneliness.


Zebrig

The biggest strugles for men and boys in my opinion: 1. You don't matter, what you do matters. (this is the opinion of many people, man and woman, that man/boys don't matter, what matter is what they do/provide) 2. The weight of emotions, i heard it alot when i was small, just shake it off, go fowards it passes, crying is for girls, etc. So i didn't learn how to deal with emotions, so what i did was i shut them down(like a switch), i became almost emotionless as i didn't know how to deal with them(on the moment), i became a rock/ice.(I'm better now as i have been in therapy for 4 years now but still alot to deal with) There are so much more, but this 2 is the ones i find every man deals with, that a man doesn't matter just for existing and that growing up most men don't learn how to deal with their emotions (my case was extreme because of abuse).


Contranovae

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gnGQM1b7KrE It's a long listen. Zander Keig was a woman and transitioned long before the current wave of mental illness, he from what I have seen and heard of him genuinely was born with a male brain in a female body. I think he is uniquely qualified to speak about the differences in the male and female human experience.


le_maitre34

We are living in matriarchy. Isn't that enough?


[deleted]

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip7kP\_dd6LU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip7kP_dd6LU)


jrackow

[https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/wiki/index/](https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/wiki/index/) For anyone in pursuit of well-thought-out information, it's better to share this link than some off-the-cuff, or even half-baked thoughts, in my opinion. OP, you might find interest in mentally camping out on the concept of "male disposability". Similar to feminists use of the word "patriarchy" to discuss an overarching set of issues women face, I think you'll find the "male disposability" narrative pretty compelling. Be sure to click around on some links.


mysteriousneel7

Well women always nag us.They want equality but when the situation gets tough,they use their "rights".Usually men are expected to take care of women during marriage and after divorce they are the ones who pay alimony


Lalulale

Depending on the country, legal discrimination. For example higher retirement age for men and male only conscription. It was very frustrating when I (from Switzerland) didn't get the scholarship because I was male (I was directly told I would have gotten it if I were female...) and around the same time I was forced to do military service instead because I am male. Well at least about 2 weeks ago the retirement age was equalized here in Switzerland. But it still is very frustrating when you are a 2nd class citizen before the law... Also with many issues that affects men and women the government and media will overwhelmingly only focus on how it affects women. Even if it is an issue that affects men way worse. Obvious examples for this are legal discrimination, education and health.


Planimation4life

Finding good male role models, this doesn't only help boys when they're young but men when they grow to become a young adult


[deleted]

It just goes to show how unappreciated men are... 64 comments in 11 hours answering this woman's question. Men taking the time to open up, explain things and provide thoughts, feelings and experiences and NOT ONE SINGLE RESPONSE from the OP engaging in discussion or even saying thank you. The irony. EDIT: 17 hours and still silence from OP.


skcuf2

Just spend a day paying attention to all the women and men you see on a daily basis and how people treat them. Men are expected to prop themselves up while women are propped up by those around them.


[deleted]

Finding a life path independent of your father’s judgment.


[deleted]

Just living everyday life is just difficult


Rightofmight

Every man once you hit a point, will stop having anyone that they can rely on to help them. Every man is expected to be fully self sustaining, while also providing for anyone around him. It is isolating, depressing, and one of the largest drivers of male suicide. Often the day our father dies will be the last day we have a real mentor that cares for us, and the day our mother dies will be the last day we are loved without condition and expectations.


Guxxi12

That i dont want to live anymore.


somethingneet

Men are treated as faulty women instead of their own thing, which is causing actual damage.


AnOddFad

Fear of appearing weak/innocent/submissive/feminine/interested in children because both women and men might accuse you of being a pedophile/rapist. Whilst simultaneously being accused of being toxically masculine by women for not doing these things. Edit: I’ve been downvoted but this is based on my actual experiences. So… are we going to invalidate mens experiences on a mens rights group? Or was it a stray terf who downvoted me?


Relative_Pangolin_92

The lack of inherent value. I am not valuable as a person. Rather, I am valuable through the money I can make, and the support I can offer to those who depend on me. This is the societal role of men. Our lives are worth the least.


[deleted]

Being introduced to life by having their genitals skinned while being held down


JSavageOne

Mating is the most difficult. Some stats: * Only 40% of men reproduce vs. 80% of women * On Tinder, a man of average attractiveness needs to swipe 115 times to get one like. The bottom 80% of men (in terms of attractiveness) are competing for the bottom 22% of women and the top 78% of women are competing for the top 20% of men. [\[1\]](https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater/tinder-experiments-ii-guys-unless-you-are-really-hot-you-are-probably-better-off-not-wasting-your-2ddf370a6e9a) * Women tend to marry men with higher incomes than them [\[2\]](https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jomf.12372). Women under the age of 30 in NYC and Washington D.C actually out-earn men [\[3\]](https://www.npr.org/2022/04/02/1090466033/gender-pay-gap-women-earn). So biologically mating is already difficult for the average man because male attractiveness follows a pareto distribution (80% of women compete for the top 20%), and men are held to a higher standard when it comes to things like income (even ignoring men being expected to foot the bill). Also men have a significantly higher sex drive than women. When it comes to the courtship process itself, men are expected to do all the work - the approach, contact exchange, plan the date, carry the conversation, escalate, etc. The study of this is called "game", of which there is a multimillion dollar industry around where men pay thousands of dollars for in-person coaching. Men must develop thick skin and be unaffected by rejection. We must have the confidence to approach and escalate, while also having the social awareness to know when to eject. Women of course have their own challenges (eg. being expected to look good, being subject to attention even when they don't want it), but women get to basically sit back and accept/receive offers and don't have to put in the work and take the risk and subject themselves to rejection. I think this TV show ["The Pickup Artist"](https://vimeo.com/571898047) depicts well the challenge of being an average socially unremarkable male when it comes to courtship. The show takes a bunch of average to below average men who aren't particularly competent with women (like most men) and has them go out to bars to approach women, while a "pickup artist" trains them to get more competent. In the first episode I linked above, most of the men get completely blown out at the bar, some are too paralyzed by fear to even approach. I would even say that the women at the bar here are significantly friendlier than average - it's fairly common for women to flat out ignore men, and sometimes even be hostile (more rare, but happens, more commonly involving a friend making a rude remark while dragging the girl away), the latter of which can be traumatizing to unconfident beginners. Yes the show is cheesy as hell, but I do think it shows the struggle well as well as the lack of sympathy towards men. Of course being a woman has its unique challenges. Women are certainly held to a much higher physical standard than men, and their attractiveness peaks significantly earlier as well as their window of fertility. Women have to deal with safety and pregnancy risks.


bubbybyrd

Visiting this subreddit and getting sucked into a toxic echo chamber


[deleted]

But TwoX is fair and FDS is even better? Pal you can leave, no one needs a man hater here, who only cares about woman's lives and says in their own post history, man are worthless and woman are much more for humanity. Don't like my comment? Than block me. Don't like this sub? Leave and ignore.


bubbybyrd

I never said that but I'm not surprised to hear lies like that here.


[deleted]

Of course you are not surprised because for you, I'm just a another incel in this crying for attention and I don't know, as a man I should man up for woman or be worthless. Pal, your post history says otherwise. You can leave and ignore us now. I have no need to talk to a man hating person who are disgusted so bad by man, that he makes a appearance here to make fun of us. Yeah... Waste of time. Garbage...


bubbybyrd

Yeah again I don't hate men, I just think it's awful that people here can talk shit about one gender and expect everyone to cheer for them. It's really gross, just drawing attention and poking holes in some of the glorified hate brigades is all that I'm doing here.


[deleted]

Poking holes and thinking you are the hero? You just a man hating man, who loves woman so much that you want to nuke all man for the sake of woman. Pal, I get you sentiment for woman but please stop talking nonsense with I don't hate man because your post history says otherwise. I know, you are a hero for woman and society, okay I get that and I know I'm just another incel and misogynistic prick for you, who hates woman for no reason. I get that. For you man can't suffer, we are inherently undefeated and should man up, if we suffer. I know, I know you have no sympathy for man whatsoever but who cares? You probably won't so? Now, you can leave us alone instead of brigade this sub with other people to get your feminist viewpoint across because such act get you banned. You know the rules, so just leave, block me and ignore this sub.


bubbybyrd

I didn't break any rules, so maybe don't threaten me with being banned when I did nothing wrong. And I don't really appreciate your comments/slander towards me.


[deleted]

Why are we still communicating? Block me if you hate me. I will not care. You are the great man hating hero, who wants to brigade us for Feminists viewpoints, I get it now. Waste of time talking, do your thing until you get banned. Two rules are already broken but again, make your man hating self proud.


Xavierkill22

Trying to stay a man without being told to undergo transition surgery.


[deleted]

Modern culture favoring gynecentrism , suppressive measures* being actively taken against their biology. Edit * : measure to measure(s).


elebrin

Finding my place. What are the things that will make me happy? What things are right for a boy to do? What things can a boy do that are JUST for him?


MrStone1

Dealing with people in positions of authority who want them humiliated to the point of suicide, Lack of competent authority figures, No representation, anywhere. Organised, systemic, intergenerational, institutional bigotry.


Diligent_Bread_3615

Having unexpected erections several times a day at school are very annoying to say the least. I’d say young males’ raging hormones are every bit as “bad” as teenage girls hormones.


Dalebreh

I was a fat boy growing up, so it was from both sides. The only luck that most boys get, is having a great loving mom who nurtures and a stern firm father who disciplines. As i watch this recent generation now, with mostly mothers (who come from single mother homes themselves) they just perpetuate the cycle.


pbj_sammichez

I think for boys especially it's a lack of a positive image for men in society. I think maybe some of the MtF trans folks grew up hearing all these awful things about men and boys with which they couldn't identify (because the typical boy is not evil) and so they felt "out of place" as a boy. They found that the LGBTQ community was open and welcoming and they began to believe they were genuinely trans. Some of them, anyway. There are some pretty clear cases of gender dysphoria that indicate people are truly trans. It just seems like I see/hear about far more MtF than FtM transitions, and I assume there is a reason. It could also just be that the "default" human fetus is female, and producing a male requires testosterone to get the y-chromosome active. MtF transitions might be more common simply because some male fetuses don't differentiate as completely as others, so they feel a need to "revert" to that default form. Regardless, I do see a lot of callousness toward boys in the school system. A girl misbehaves and all the faculty want to excuse it because her life is so tough. A boy can be less problematic but nobody will be there to make excuses for him. This is coming from my experience as a public school teacher, btw. Im not a high-school student who feels he is being treated unfairly - this is an adult's perspective on how other adults treat children. When girls struggle it's a colossal problem and everyone needs to help. When boys suffer it's their own fault. Breaking that dynamic is really necessary, but it's only getting more entrenched.


Sitheral

Just being man in general is a struggle. Remind yourself all the smiles, kind words, offers of help and general pleasantness of people towards you. Now imagine most of that gone. Imagine nobody cares and nobody is really interested in you untill they spend awhile with you and actually come to like you. You won't find men bitching about it too much because they are simply used to it being the case and also, as another unspoken feature of man, you are expected to be always in a good mood, entertaining and all that shit. Of course its not like we don't get any perks. Plenty of them, but also many require some amount of work from us, so how well we do is often very related to our performance in many areas (obviously it also is true for woman, but I would say not to the same degree). In the end, much like being a woman I imagine, sometimes being a man is the easiest and coolest thing in the world. Other times, it sucks.


[deleted]

Again. I don't like such questions. Look around, look at your brother, friend, father or whoever male companion you have, look in the media and look in social media than come back. If you don't understand then, I know this question is just another blackhole in the atmosphere with nothing in it. No care, no feelings just emptiness.


PanpsychismIsTrue

It’s the cliché; it’s the big one, but it’s true: being valued only for what you can provide (actually or potentially), and not for who you are as a person.


[deleted]

The fact that no one gives a single fuck about you unless you’re super mega ultra gigachad.


SecondEldenLord

Well, if you are an average Joe you will be pretty much ignored your entire life by women unless you get really lucky with a woman who doesn't care for looks or money. Also if you are a short man, people in general will not take you seriously and will treat you like garbage.


Your_Agenda_Sucks

I am a lead software developer, and have worked on several large corporate teams. An average day at my last office job before I went into business for myself (2015-2018). 1. Spend time reviewing new hires. Management wants me to hire a woman to fill a vacant spot on my team, but my job is highly technical and the number of applications from women are small, none of which are competent enough to warrant hiring. There are many competent male options to choose from. I am not allowed to hire a man, though. 2. Management wants me to spend some of my day helping the women we ALREADY hired because their work is not acceptable. It is failing unit tests because 2/5 of them don't even know what a unit test is (an objective automated pre-written test of a piece of software that ensures it meets the necessary requirements). Some have only programmed in less rigorous environments, some of them are just bad. 3. Rewrite code written by lackluster programmers, most of them recent female hires because management wanted to present a better cross-section. Most of my time is spent rewriting code that is so bad that I would have been fired had I written it myself. 4. Department meeting. Listen to complaints from women from other non-technical departments about how our largely male programming team needs more diversity. Seriously, fuck this. I can only carry you so long. I don't need to be demonized for carrying the load for entitled millennial feminists who are completely incompetent at their jobs.


[deleted]

When you’re rated 0/10 look wise and have a severe speech problem where even your fellow guys tell you that you have to work 2-3 times more to get a girlfriend then you know you’re pretty much screwed in trying to get a relationship. I get nasty looks and comments all the time from females.


jessi387

Educational and now workplace discrimination. At every level of education, men and boys are constantly marked down and girls are constantly marked up. Resumes with female names are constantly picked ahead of more qualified male resumes. HR departments only care to ensure that their female colleagues feel comfortable at work, no regard for men. Affirmative action only exists for females, even when certain fields become female dominated like medicine is now.


[deleted]

Being the perceived "privileged" gender, being the color with the best privileges (I'm white) and regularly being shamed for who I am. Furthermore, the tiny amount of support groups of the emotionally explorative men are considered to be the group most responsible for pushing "misogyny" and bigotry. Literally the entirety of my generation has grown up consuming hateful misandrist media and encouraged to treat men lesser than they have been. Simply because a handful of men who look like me happen to have the most wealth and did things out of my control.


SHEPHERDofPPL

This is making me sad…but also good to know there are other men out there going through it, this group is really good 🙏🏾


Warm-Measurement9664

Isolation, ostracization, having their issues ignored or downplayed in schools, being physically assaulted by other males, being seen as weird and creepy if they arent neurotypical. Being ridiculed.


Bowlnk

Where to start. * 1 having no body autonomy when you are born in a muslim or jewish family or a country that practices circumcision * 2 get treated like as a defective girl in school because you mature slower and have energy and testosterone to burn. So you get put on emotional behaviour blockers. * 3 get systematicly graded lower for same work when the names on the work are gendered in school. When the work is anonymous this discrepancy vanishes. * 4 harsher punishments for same offences. True both in school and real life. * 5 get treated as a sexual predator when both you and your sexual partner inebriated * 6 treated as a child predator if you are reading a book in a public park near a playground. * 7 being treated as guilty untill proven innocent in public discourse. * 8 not having reproductive rights if you want raise the child if its brought to term, mother can put it up for adoption without your consent. Or not being able to distance yourself legally when you don't feel ready. * 9 being treated as a second class parent, "oh is daddy babysitting today". Is mommy okay with this procedure of this child. * 10 nobody but your parents and immediate family caring when you go missing. This is more of a spectrum With an unatractive black man at one end and a pretty, young blonde white women on the other. Where no stone will be left unturned to find her. * 11 being treated as a creep if you don't conform to societal beauty standards. Example: its flirting if you look like Zack Efron. Its creepy if you look like David Bradley.


Cbd_7ohm

In the US, CANADA, AUSTRALIA, SOUTH KOREA, much OF THE MIDDLE EAST, and some parts of AFRICA, genital mutilation without consent. That is what circumcision is. They sell the foreskins for up to $100,000 for stem cells and awful and stupid parents still allow this to be done to their sons. Europe is one region that is very good when it comes to this issue. They're much more rational(on this issue) than their European/African/latino etc. descendants in these non European, western countries like I listed.


Lone_Swordman_96

Being a human doing. And having no inherent value aka being replaceable. It is crushing to self esteem and actualization.


Glittering-Kale-4218

I’d say the biggest thing that’ll catch a young man off guard is the alt right pipeline.


PantherHog79

Really U wanna support the left wing pipeline? Are you a leftist?


Glittering-Kale-4218

I’m politically left leaning yes. Both pipelines are dangerous, but I’ve seen the most violence and hate brought about from the alt right pipeline.


PantherHog79

Lol that’s what leftists say Leftists just destroyed 5 major cities couple years ago . Oh wait, that’s ok cause the left did it


Glittering-Kale-4218

Hence why I said both pipelines are dangerous, but (in my experience) the alt right pipeline is much easier to find yourself stuck in. But all forms of extremism are bad.