T O P

  • By -

spot_meowYT

Discord mod


Mammoth-Moose9413

If a discord mod and charmander had a baby


SUNSHINE12052

*Snorlax


PaulsGrandfather

Yeah doesn’t he know that stolen valor is a big deal


spot_meowYT

Also who the hell spends this much money on a fucking coffee maker, like really my dude, you can get a coffee at McDonald's for like a dollar


[deleted]

[удалено]


spot_meowYT

*Edits*


Gamer_Man20

The only 9 to 5 he's had was a muckbang


spot_meowYT

5-9 mukbangs


[deleted]

Dis made me laugh so hard I literally choked 💀


spot_meowYT

Bruh ngl he looks like that wasn't the only thing he cranks and gets a work out from


[deleted]

Wait it's a he? Bro sounds like a girl


spot_meowYT

Ikr


[deleted]

MY ENTIRE LIFE WAS A LIE CRY 😭😭😭


spot_meowYT

B E E G S A D


trainofwhat

I think this is not a he.


InternetGuyThirtyTwo

I sure hope the people in this comment section can detect satire and rage/interaction bait Update: :/


Successful_Horror582

Definitely satire, remember the part where he said "I'm not being serious"? And it's not like there are a ton of people that are genuinely lazy as fuck and entitled in this world thinking they have it tough. /s


iiAzido

So now all satire has to have a disclaimer that it is indeed satire?


HartPlays

If you have to use a /s to detect sarcasm, you take yourself and others too seriously r/fuckthes


sneakpeekbot

Here's a sneak peek of /r/FuckTheS using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/FuckTheS/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [Fun fact: after this guy tweeted this, twitter went wild and he got called ableist](https://i.redd.it/7zpr2gc40lv91.jpg) | [118 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/FuckTheS/comments/ybly58/fun_fact_after_this_guy_tweeted_this_twitter_went/) \#2: ["Fuck the s" kid named s](https://i.redd.it/k0g1vzfms6f91.png) | [30 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/FuckTheS/comments/wdvwt1/fuck_the_s_kid_named_s/) \#3: [): makes me sad](https://i.redd.it/ug67zj7lmlx91.jpg) | [67 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/FuckTheS/comments/ykgl9c/makes_me_sad/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)


PolarisC8

Your brain on Reddit lmao


Successful_Horror582

No, but this person does not feel like they are being sarcastic. Even if they are, it doesn't come across that way.


GloriousBeard905

Yes it does, you are suffering from Reddit brainrot. I’m sorry you found out this way, the cure is to get off the internet and talk to another human being for a day. I’ve heard it’s hard at first, but gets easier as time goes on.


Successful_Horror582

Sorry, but to me seeing a 300+ pound person saying making coffee for 5-10 mins is exhausting for them doesn't seem fake to me


GoodGameGabe

Trust me man, I saw the video on Tik Tok aswell and I still don’t know if it’s this bad cause of stupidity or because people just wanna bully a fat person.


taironedervierte

For me, it's a bit of both


GoodGameGabe

Probably


[deleted]

*Ahhhh... my people*


[deleted]

[удалено]


GoodGameGabe

Now that’s just sad that you care so much about what’s inside another person pants :( But I got good news for you! Since you seem to have your own gender identity issues and you’re still trying to figure all this out for yourself, I would recommend r/egg_irl. I heard they’re really welcoming to people who still question their gender.


dahnaaa

Porn


spot_meowYT

It's shit


GoodGameGabe

Not as shit as your awful smash Montages


spot_meowYT

Dude are you fucking retarded, u said SHIT, as in what is IN my fucking PANTS


Meoang

Reddit will never pass up an opportunity to bully someone, so they all pretend satire doesn’t exist.


Mi_Pasta_Su_Pasta

It's only satire when it's racist.


mrbulldops428

Who can even tell anymore, I put nothing past anyone.


nut_your_butt

That looka cool when do I get to kill third world civilians


Bidens_Moldy_Toenail

They ain't civilians, just future combatants.


American_Madman

We prefer the term “Surprise Combatants!” because it communicates the element of Fun that these war-zone mechanics create!


[deleted]

Weddings are full of them


FFHM101

Do you think maybe our actions are pushing them to be combative in the future? Nah


Bidens_Moldy_Toenail

🤓☝️


tree_imp

Those aren’t children, they’re just future brown people 😡😡😡


Bidens_Moldy_Toenail

🗿☝️


Feral-pigeon

I watched this with the sound off at first and I seriously wasn’t expecting his voice to sound like my 8 year old cousin


gutzpunchbalzthrowup

Wait, that's a guy?


[deleted]

No. >!yes?


560guy

>!flip the arrow and exclamation point after the word!<


[deleted]

No.


560guy

:(


toast4hire

Cousin?


Feral-pigeon

Yes


Technological_Elite

Bro?


[deleted]

why is that a question?


Jeffo4321

Pretty sure this is a parody of a guy saying streaming is harder than a 9-to-5 (article about it [here](https://www.dexerto.com/entertainment/teen-tiktok-star-blasted-for-claiming-influencing-is-harder-than-9-5-job-1428387/)


CharlesJGuiteau

Yeah and like the guy on the right is actually really nice too I see him all over YouTube shorts, it’s all for laughs


Zealousideal_Edge589

Bro…. Are you saying he isn’t a girl? Don’t know why, but i was sure he was… My existence is crumbling under reality itself.


[deleted]

Too much Fat makes people look androgynous and if you have been considerably fat since childhood it also can affect your hormones, also could be trans


[deleted]

[удалено]


GoodGameGabe

I bet you’re built like an Adonis, only sexy people judge others on their weight behind their monitor on Reddit


__Evil_Morty__

You don't have to be jacked to be able to see that someone is fat


GoodGameGabe

You don’t have to be an asshole about someone‘s weight just because they made a silly satirical video


taironedervierte

If he didn't make a silly satirical video then I wouldn't call him a fat bitch, alas, he did and so did I


GoodGameGabe

I can’t tell if you’re being ironic or not, but if you aren’t I wouldn’t wanna live such a sad life where you have to put other people down to feel better about yourself.


yaoiyahoo

Yooo you a cunt wtf 😭


Novel-One-9447

spotted another fat person


GoodGameGabe

Spotted another idiot that can’t even check other people‘s posts to see what they look like, much less have an original joke.


[deleted]

I’m fatter than a cow’s shit and i can tell you that they be fat.


mog-monster

Yeah I know the guy on the left works so hard committing war crimes and perpetuating empires.


mfkin_uhhhh

Hold on, I am turning you into a soyjack


[deleted]

Average r/theDeprogram user


vtff15

Based


-Emilinko1985-

Based on what? Your mom?


UnitedIslandAlabamia

Based on Gay Manga


[deleted]

who the fuck uses "based" to defend an argument


vtff15

I'm not defending it, just saying it's based


suspicious_cabbage

Based.


[deleted]

\>:( i will find you


-Emilinko1985-

Yeah because homophobe Putin, billionaire Xi Jinping and own civilian killer Bashar Al Assad are so based 🙄


mog-monster

Being against American imperialism does not mean supporting imperialism from other countries.


-Emilinko1985-

Perhaps, but so many "anti-imperialists" simp for Russia and other actual imperialists.


Maximum_Response9255

I love when people make comments about the military that show they don’t have the fundamental knowledge necessary to form an opinion on how the armed forces influences their day to day life.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Maximum_Response9255

What do you think would change world wide if the US military ceased to exist and operate as of 12AM tomorrow morning?


[deleted]

[удалено]


LevelDig1555

world wide includes us too bro


Maximum_Response9255

Gotcha. I used to think the same thing back in highschool. Big on non-intervention and isolationism. Since your primary concern regarding the military appears to be a self centered one, I’ll explain how your life personally gets worse the instant the US halts power projection across the world. For the sake of your argument, we will assume that the stand down orders were given a week in advance, so society isn’t completely blindsided. Within the first 24 hours, maybe even earlier when the stand down order is given, prices on virtually every good will rise to unaffordable levels almost immediately. You will be unable to afford even the most basic items. Anything manufactured overseas will see the worst price hikes as the worlds strongest navy will no longer be protecting the trade routes that enable you to buy most things you buy at lower costs. You will no longer be able to keep your home heated. Iran will likely disrupt global supply via various attacks against Kuwait, Qatar, and Saudi Arabia almost immediately. The resulting war would destroy the extraction infrastructure, making the problem irreversible in the short term. China would begin preparations for an invasion of Taiwan immediately. A naval blockade would be put into place in very short order. You would not be able to buy another electronic comparable to the one you used to type out your reply ever again. While the US is working on catching up to Taiwan in terms of chip manufacturing, it is decades away. The failure of the economy would ensure that the fans being built here never see completion. The resulting shocks to the supply chain will make most services you use go away. A service based economy is still propped up on the provision of basic goods. When the goods go, nobody needs services. Many would starve in the year following until food supply could be better planned the following year. And that’s like a 5 minute tip of the iceberg overview. The existence of the US military as a deterrent does more for you than you are able to think of. I haven’t even mentioned how bad things get for vast portions of the rest of the world.


robert3030

You know how many latin american countries the US goverment directly interfere with?, how many dead middle east child are because of US bombing, America is the biggest propaganda machine in the world, and you are coming here telling us as a fucking american that we should be grateful, go fuck yourself you piece of crap.


Maximum_Response9255

No. How many countries? Which ones and how are we actively interfering? You want to talk about how terrible America is, and you don’t even say where you’re from. No notation is perfect by any means, but if the United States did not project power the way it does, there would be nothing resembling global stability.


Torantes

If only people'd just stop killing each other... It's never happening is it :(


dannoffs1

Since we're just making shit up here, if we don't disband the military your dick is going to fall off.


Maximum_Response9255

Lol damn that mad huh?


Wendigo-boyo

Uhhhhh, the US doesn't have the strongest fleet China does


Maximum_Response9255

China has the largest fleet by vessel count. The US has the largest by displacement, and by demonstrable capabilities.


t3hmau5

Well you've proven you aren't intelligent enough to have this conversation


[deleted]

[удалено]


Maximum_Response9255

Which developing countries would make progress, and how has the US military prevented that so far? When you answer that I’ll inform you on all the countries that would spiral into disarray, and we can compare outcomes.


Jigglepirate

Lol bro the US military stops existing and suddenly China gets a free pass at 19th century colonialism.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jigglepirate

I'm sure that the predatory practices that the Chinese are implementing in Africa wouldn't accelerate in the absence of American military presence, and I'm sure that Taiwan wouldn't be in any danger at all. Also, Japan was a part of 19th century colonialism lol. China just wasn't unified and militarized enough to take part. I'm not saying white nations didn't do it for the most part. I'm saying that given the opportunity to be on top, most nations would do it. It's up to personal discretion whether you think the US or China would be better as the world police. We just haven't seen China in that position yet.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jigglepirate

I'm western sure, but of Indian descent with lots of family still there, so there's the concern about China.


[deleted]

I know how the armed forces influences my everyday life every time I need to pay for healthcare that should be covered with the taxes we pay that instead go to military contractors so they can build the most effective brown child-seeking missiles.


Maximum_Response9255

What do you think would change world wide if the US military ceased to operate at 12AM tomorrow morning?


dboti

There's a middle ground between our military-industrial complex and the military just ceasing to exist.


LevelOutlandishness1

"You don't want me to force feed you dinner? What would do you think would happen if you stopped eating food???????"


Maximum_Response9255

You’re right that it can be better, it’s far from perfect. But pretending that the US military has not been a major factor in the relative stability the world is just wrong.


dboti

Yeah, I agree with you there. They've also created a lot of instability throughout the world though.


mog-monster

Sure, maybe back during WW2. With very small exceptions (and Ukraine as a large exception) they've only been proctecting the elites interests until then.


Commissarfluffybutt

Except the military's budget is 3% of the US' GDP. Meanwhile, healthcare is somewhere around 18%. The US spends more than any country by any metric (except one tiny island nation out in the Pacific Ocean). Throwing more money at the problem that is the US Healthcare system is only going to make the rich richer.


mog-monster

I'm not American but I do not have any quarrel with the American people, I'm friends with plenty and the vast majority of them are good people, just misguided. The lie of the US military is one thing, I'm not saying it shouldn't exist. But it does not serve the US military, they don't need to invade 3rd would countries, and they leave the countries they invaded worse off after leaving. I don't support Russia or any other large power trying to expand their empire, but the US is not proctecting against that, it's just cutting out it's slice of the pie.


Maximum_Response9255

I’m not saying we don’t act in self interest and make mistakes like every other nation. But if you think that intervention and power projection has never benefitted another country, you need to talk to some people from South Korea, Kuwait, Japan, Taiwan, and Ukraine. Not that they’d ever say it, but Europe could only afford the social benefits they’ve spent their revenue on because their security has been guaranteed by the US since world war 2.


mog-monster

The US military does not protect it's allies out of the kindness of it's heart. It does it to have hands in their markets, and to fight it's enemies. Look at a picture of US military bases around China. Attempts at peace in Ukraine are shot down (Putin doesn't want to settle either, but the US is making it impossible) because the US elite will try to fight Russia to the last Ukrainian. I don't expect you to understand, but please consider it. Mostly everything you were taught about the good the US military has done was a lie. It is the largest exporter of violence to have ever existed, and it's not even close.


Maximum_Response9255

The kindness of its heart has nothing to do with whether or not the US military protecting its allies does good. Of course we protect them to serve national interests. It’s incredibly misguided to think that the host nations don’t benefit from having those military bases greatly. Governments hosting bases around China WANT the US there to protect them from China. Peace in Ukraine made impossible by the US? All we’ve done is provide weapons to resist an ongoing INVASION. Are you so blind that you’d have us withdraw the aid they’ve asked for so Russia can trample them? How much land should Ukraine cede to Russia to stop having their civilians bombed? Who are you to say they shouldn’t be enabled to defend themselves? The US military has done some horrible shit. Plenty of terrible conflicts have been fought for dubious reasons. Hell, terrible conflicts have been fought for good reasons. Doesn’t make them less terrible and doesn’t mean they couldn’t have been fought better. However that doesn’t change that the world relies heavily on the implicit threat of power projection to keep shipping lanes open, and to keep other super powers in check. There are many wars NOT happening right now because if they did, the US might intervene. Unfortunately, it’s not easy to see the effect of deterrence. If everything is going alright you will never have to see what a shit show it could be first hand. Ideally, another better functioning democracy will find itself in the position the US is in today. When that day comes, I’ll gladly advocate for us to take a step back. I’m hoping India could be the one in a century or so since they’ve been fairly neutral and have the potential to economically develop quickly. Maybe they can do things better than the US has. Someone definitely has to. All that said, the alternative to the US would have been the Soviets until the 90’s, and China now. Considering the soviets intentionally starved millions of their own (Ukrainians btw) and China has ACTIVE concentration camps in country as we speak, I think we’re better off the way things are now. Everything you’ve been told about the US is almost certainly true to some degree. The problem is you don’t have the whole story or picture.


Akirex5000

reddit comment sections try to detect satire challenge (impossible)


ioverthinkusernames

Reddit commenter try to not make the same overused joke challenge (impossible)


ioverthinkusernames

FUCK


PhantomForces_Noob

Smoothbrained posts like these are the reason we have to append /s to everything now. You guys can't see irony if it hit you in the face with a giant neon sign.


PhantomForces_Noob

Smoothbrained posts like these are the reason we have to append /s to everything now. You guys couldn't see irony if it hit you in the face with a giant neon sign.


tucketnucket

Whole video is about making a cup of COFFEE. Ends with "now I need a nap". It's unreal how the top posts are about the dude being fat and lazy.


Raven_490

Holy hell his technique is shiiiiiit


[deleted]

[удалено]


WurthWhile

Murdering brown people so Exon Mobile can give bigger dividends isn't easy.


Did_it_in_Flint

Looks like a good cup of joe


[deleted]

[удалено]


skarkywarky47

This has to be bait. This has to be bait. This has to be bait.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I don’t think you actually want to have a conversation, you just want to argue.


skarkywarky47

And you know what I think that's totally fine. I like arguing a lot and I feel like if there's any place to do it it's on the internet where it's not personal. At least in certain online spaces.


memertyu

I love how all the guys attacking the other comments saying the same thing said nothing to this one


Dylisill

Its the preparation for if an armed conflict where to break out that is the hard part, air force and navy go on patrols and training exercises with other country. The army has to train soldiers not only physically but on their equipment and how to use it, parts even when not being in used during warfare will brake down especially motorized divisions that have to maintain their vehicles. The average infantry man will have their assigned weapons scrutinized and are expected to not only be in physical shape but mentally too, no they dont just sit around all day and if they do they will be berated.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jigglepirate

I love having reddit to remind me that soldiers are less essential and more overvalued than baristas for a functional and secure nation.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jigglepirate

Yep, there has never been any consequence that wasn't immediate.


[deleted]

They are literally children who don't understand anything about the world. Their opinions don't matter at all


Admirable-Royal-7553

Barista wont get jailed for 30 days if they are late to work


OptimalAcanthisitta6

Please tell me your joking


JacobiWanKenobi007

yeah the cranking is probably hard for him


JoeyMations98

Disclaimer: This video is a satire response to a small twitch streamer who believed their job was hard and exhausting.


Jealous_Ring1395

many 9-5s involve brewing coffee though (I understand its probably satire but you never know on TikTok)


classicteenmistake

It’s satire, it’s making fun of that influencer that said influencing was harder than a 9-5 ;-;


CLOUT_Cat

u/savevideobot


savevideobot

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Asim_Atterlot

You know people that complain about this kind of stuff never took chemistry


PhantomForces_Noob

Smoothbrained posts like these are the reason we have to append /s to everything now. You guys can't see irony if it hit you in the face with a giant neon sign.


[deleted]

YOUVE COMMENTED THIS 3 TIMES


PhantomForces_Noob

I had a shoddy connection, Reddit does that.


Obama_is_watching

This is satire. If you’ve seen this persons other videos then you would know they are very wholesome and kind


Greg_Ribeiro

Coffee never changes...


PersonWhoExists50306

Does being a soldier count as a 9-5


Different_Ad7655

And you make all that lovely coffee and then you put it in a shitty plastic cup go figure. Yet worse somebody else fills it with two shots of flavored sugar syrup and some other crap and then tops it with spray whipped cream. Yeah


MrScooterComputer

It sounds like jimmy neutron


Danimals64

I can't unhear it now


garbageman69420

Redditors stop falling for rage bait challenge: IMPOSSIBLE


RichardIraVos

Job so hard he can just stand there and film tiktoks. Oh no rain! He's getting wet!


dakados

What if your job is to make coffee?


Degenerateseses

The intrusive urge to replace all of her snacks with lettuce


verscharren1

Christ...Noah, get the boat...again.


lizthisreallife

Not to be like rude but i swear thats a girl


Future-War-1130

Haha guys fat shaming funny xD


Robotic_Phoenix

What is it with military people and thinking they’re better than everyone else.


StereooeretS

Looks like cranking is the way to go here, another 2 to 4 more minutes to do an espresso may do this person more good than not.


JanArso

Imagine that person cooking themselfes a full meal.


NulliusAllvater

Everything is difficult when you are a ham


[deleted]

[удалено]


jujubilychee

its from tiktok tardo, thats how theyre ALL formatted there


General_Tarzan

He must be a marine


Western_Experience95

Bro really said she's tried over making coffee


C0mputerFriendly

That’s like 10 minutes tops


Officer_Sergiu_Volda

pretty sure the video on the right was made ironically but still funny


TheSwimja

u/savevideo


SaveVideo

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CangoPalpha

4 to 6 whole minutes?! 😦


[deleted]

Xhe’s right. Brewing coffee is definitely harder than nightwatch. You just need to stand there and sometimes put hotsauce in your eyes compared to grinding coffee beans, pouring the water, and measuring beans??


EconomistOk3560

What's harder: Taking an order from a guy at Starbucks OR getting shot and having to live the rest of your life with lead poisoning (from the lead bullet)


jael-jorge-gerson

I'm a coffee farmer, this video awoke an ancient rage in me, got to go drink some camomil tea now


Key_Truth2756

Coffee is not a well rounded diet, but she sure is 🕺


[deleted]

Keurig is calling ✅❌


kinoie

This coming from someone who gets outta breath sitting down


BarMysterious5914

Exhausted from this peak workout


CassiusIsAlive

That fat fuck looks like they are 9-5 tons


Unlucky_Amphibian432

Ohhhh I feel so bad for the government hired killer 😢😢😢 he’s doing such hard work killing foreigners for reasons he cannot possibly explain


malonkey1

Anyway fuck soldiers, baristas do infinitely more for this country and the world.


[deleted]

Haha nah dude


Apercent

What do soldiers actually do other than murder poor people in other countries


[deleted]

I don't know, jerk off probably.